Fictitious GW store website

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**sing your life**

Medium of Death wrote:
I wonder why GW hasn't had facebook take this page down? Is it protected under some kind of "parody" thing, or something?

Maybe they're just biding their time..

**Grimtuff**

Medium of Death wrote:
I wonder why GW hasn't had facebook take this page down? Is it protected under some kind of "parody" thing, or something?

Maybe it's got the same parody protection as Twitter has. If you state outright it's a parody account on Twitter, they cannot touch you. This is the reason things like @FillWerell, @WWECreative_Ish @DumbKellykelly and @CrankyVince for example continue to exist.

**Chrissy_J**

Fantastic work, well done to whoever is behind it. Gave me a chuckle, anyway.

**Sledgio**

Haha, hilarious!

**OrlandotheTechnicoloured**

Games Workshop: Fulchester

In honour of the release of The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug, we'll be taking full advantage of our Lord of The Rings license and be hosting a 'Paint a Space Marine' contest.

Yes, that doesn't make sense, but why should we start now?

**Kroothawk**

They have been busy:
23rd November:

In case you're wondering where the publicity and media frenzy was for Warhammer 40K during it's 25th Anniversary, we had loads of things planned, but our PR department was busy on an 18 month course learning how to juggle their own bollocks.

They're still not very good at it.

29th November:

We would like to remind customers that we still have copies of both the original HeroQuest game in stock. Sadly, all the cards are in Spanish, but what can you do?

1st December:

After a long and extensive search for the brightest new genre talent, and after reading through the submissions of countless talented writers, we can happily announce that the new weiters for our Black Library Warhammer and Warhammer 40K novels are:

Phil Kelly, Graeme Lyon, Mat Ward and Laurie Goulding.

Yes we know, we searched the world and it turned out they were right on our doorstep. Who would have thought it? We have a secret formula we apply to work out who will write the best novels for us; one day we'll let you into the secret.

18th December:

The ravening hordes come, day after day. We are tired and weary, and no matter how hard we try to repel, still they come, the unrelenting horde.

Of confused parents. Asking for 'little men' for Christmas. We're getting bored of re-directing them to Steve's Midget Emporium.

19th December:

Dear Confused Looking Shoppers,

We.Do.Not.Sell.Video.Games.

Nor do we sell Monopoly. Yes, we know it's confusing that they are games other than the latest FPS DeathFest and "that boring one with the money and the scotty dog" but there you go.

Yes, we sit round playing games all day; that's exactly right. And yes, if you ask us one more banal question, we are allowed to ground you down for paint.

20th December:

No Madam, we do not a sell an Aryan supremacy magazine for racist midgets. You may be thinking of a fantasy and sci-fi modelling magazine that we do sell.

22st December:

Apparently a recent post really upset @LaurieGoulding We would like to apologise. Sadly, our window for apologies is now closed, so we can't

24th December:

Top Tip for Parents this Christmas:

Screw it, buy them a big box of Space Marines. You can't go wrong with Space Marines.

27th December

Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha.
No.

As a special post-Christmas offer, you may exchange the gift your loved ones carefully bought for you for something you might actually want.

We will still stare at you in a slightly disapproving way though; all part of the service.

6th January:

Another day spent peddling plastic crap to rich idiots.

I mean selling high quality collectible plastic crap to a dedicated audience who are both money and time rich.

7th January:

The official Twitter Feed, @Voxcaster has been down for since February.We didn't forget the password though - we just didn't feed the intern

9th January:

So then, a small confession. We misunderstood the communication from Head Office regarding the cancellation of White Dwarf.

Anyone know how to dispose of midget corpses?

**fishy bob**

They don't stop delivering

**Harriticus**

Can't believe GW hasn't tried to shut this down yet. Above all else they're spiteful and petty

**Azreal13**

Harriticus wrote:
Can't believe GW hasn't tried to shut this down yet. Above all else they're spiteful and petty

Which, fortunately for GW, isn't in the least bit illegal.

**Pacific**

Harriticus wrote:
Can't believe GW hasn't tried to shut this down yet. Above all else they're spiteful and petty

Actually think it's pretty light hearted and amusing. Although, I guess it's probably subjective (and more of a British thing?)

The fact that it hasn't been shut down shows that there are still some human beings (and not just corporate cronies) working at the HQ in Nottingham.

**jonolikespie**

Pacific wrote:
Harriticus wrote:
Can't believe GW hasn't tried to shut this down yet. Above all else they're spiteful and petty

Actually think it's pretty light hearted and amusing. Although, I guess it's probably subjective (and more of a British thing?)

The fact that it hasn't been shut down shows that there are still some human beings (and not just corporate cronies) working at the HQ in Nottingham.

I think that the fact this hasn't been shut down has nothing to do with GW not being

s and entirely with FaceBook not being

s.

**Eldercaveman**

Pacific wrote:
Harriticus wrote:
Can't believe GW hasn't tried to shut this down yet. Above all else they're spiteful and petty

Actually think it's pretty light hearted and amusing. Although, I guess it's probably subjective (and more of a British thing?)

The fact that it hasn't been shut down shows that there are still some human beings (and not just corporate cronies) working at the HQ in Nottingham.

To be fair to GW, working in Nottingham would be enough to suck the human out of anyone.

**barnstapleben**

I don't think it does any harm ti gw, it isnt promoting anyone but them, albeit not necessarily positively

**Tigurius**

Destinct apathy from Facebook and GW, if either had a desire to shut it down, they would.

GW has it's critics, these's are satirical rather than malicious, so I see no reason why they'd bother!

**Kilkrazy**

There's no way GW could legally shut down this page. They aren't selling anything, and their use of GW terminology is obviously done for the jokes and criticism.

**farmersboy**

Eldercaveman wrote:
Pacific wrote:
Harriticus wrote:
Can't believe GW hasn't tried to shut this down yet. Above all else they're spiteful and petty

Actually think it's pretty light hearted and amusing. Although, I guess it's probably subjective (and more of a British thing?)

The fact that it hasn't been shut down shows that there are still some human beings (and not just corporate cronies) working at the HQ in Nottingham.

To be fair to GW, working in Nottingham would be enough to suck the human out of anyone.

I once lived and worked in Shottingham for six months...

The horror! Oh, the horror...

**Grimtuff**

I've said it before in the thread, but parody accounts (if they are marked as such) are protected on Twitter. I don't see why the same should not be true on FB.

**Kroothawk**

It is with a heavy heart that we have to announce that due to the massive dip in recent profits and our rapidly plummeting share price that CEO Tom Kirby has had to deal with the problem directly.

We aren't sure why sending the boss to our sister branch, Games Workshop Summerisle during the Wicker Man Festival will help with the current crisis, but we are assured that it will.

**doc1234**

Harriticus wrote:
Can't believe GW hasn't tried to shut this down yet. Above all else they're spiteful and petty

You mean as opposed to the paragons of fair play and free spirit that GW are?

**Harriticus**

I was actually saying GW is mean and spiteful. This fictitious store site is hilarious.

Keep in mind in GW's legal terms they say nobody is even allowed to get a tattoo with their IP (seriously I'd love to see how they enforce that. Rip it from peoples flesh?) and if you use their IP in a forum/chat avatar you better give them credit (OR ELSE). I'm not making it up, this is 100% true. How this site still exists is impressive.

**doc1234**

Ah my mistake then, misinterpreted you. In fairness i'm equally surprised this thread hasn't attracted more "don't be mean to gw your just jealous" types.

Still that sounds a little sever. Slightly tempted to tattoo an aquila to myself and show them mind but.

**Eldercaveman**

Rumours are flying around that we will soon stop supporting the Wood Elves range of models.

These rumours are not true. We NEVER supported the Wood Elves range of models.

**filbert**

Zing!

Like all good satire there is a kernel of truth at the centre too.

**Scipio Africanus**

this is a lark. How can you sit here with a straight face and report on it?

Thanks for the laugh, Kroot. You never disappoint.

**alex2781**

"Rumours are flying around that we will soon stop supporting the Wood Elves range of models.

These rumours are not true. We NEVER supported the Wood Elves range of models."

so true

As a special post-Christmas offer, you may exchange the gift your loved ones carefully bought for you for something you might actually want.

We will still stare at you in a slightly disapproving way though; all part of the service.

Wish this was my local store

**master of ordinance**

The WE models may never have been supported, but the firepower they can bring? Thats another thing.

**Kroothawk**

2nd February:

No madam, 40,000 is the year that this game is set in. Not how much it costs. Though you may have a point.

4th February:

Due to a poorly worded letter from head officer and a very keen key timer, the store now has no metal in at all.

We get new shelves on Thursday. Please be careful when entering the store, as the door has no handle. Or hinges.

10th February:

We are an entirely fictional, nostalgia fuelled store that looks at Games Workshop's output with rose-tinted glasses.

And even we think that Zoats were a bit crap.

14th February:

Dear Customer,

Feel free to loudly and proudly explain what non-GW products are available on the market when we claim to have heard of ManticHordes or Mauli-Infinity or whatever.

Us claiming to have never have heard of them is not some short-sighted sales tactic to allow us to point out our own superior market position. We genuinely have no idea what you're talking about. We also have our names sewn into the back of our uniforms and occasionally forget that it isn't the nineties any more.

17th February:

We do not stock Forge World products in store and that goes double for the Horus Heresy Character Series.

Except for Alpharius. We have boxes and boxes of Alpharius models and they're even in plastic.

**OrlandotheTechnicoloured**

Games Workshop: Fulchester

Oh no fair. We can't take the piss out of Imperial Knights, they've always been awesome.

**sing your life**

Kroothawk wrote:
2nd February:

No madam, 40,000 is the year that this game is set in. Not how much it costs. Though you may have a point.

This is just beautiful.

**Kroothawk**

GW Fulchester wrote:Pre-orders for the Warhammer 40K eighth edition rule book are now available. We have no firm date as yet; we should have a better idea six weeks after the seventh edition comes out.

Remember we only get 12 editions before it runs out of regenerations.