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 Kriswall wrote:
Worst case of cheese I ever saw was during a 'Beginner's Tournament'. The rules were simple. Players had to build an army using a single Combined Arms Detachment and no more than 500 points. The idea was that most people would bring an HQ, 2x Troops and maybe one other unit depending on how much their HQ/2x Troops cost.

A dude showed up with this list...

HQ Chaos Sorceror w/no upgrades
Troops Min-sized Cultists w/no upgrades
Troops Min-sized Cultists w/no upgrades
Fast Attack Heldrake
Fast Attack Heldrake

Sigh. We actually spent time thinking about it and nobody could come up with a douchier list.

Spiritseer
3x Windriders
3x Scatbikes
Wraithknight?

497 points.

Back in fifth edition, I played in a tournament against a Sister's player. The table was a standard RoB board, with the hills in the back corners. His Exorcists were 3rd edition Whirlwinds, and he parked modern rhinos crossways in front of them. A third one was likewise parked in the middle of the board.

So, being perched on the hill, that gave the missile launchers of the Exorcists great view of the battle field, but they were the only thing visible over the rhinos blocking them. The hull was completely obscured, except for very extreme angles along the board edge. I forget what was in the rest of his army. A lot of Immolators, IIRC.

I was actually playing Sisters too, and thought I would have some fun with it, and who would expect someone to show up with Penitent Engines and Repentia. IIRC, that's the game I managed to score zero kill points on before getting table.

ERJAK wrote:

 Peregrine wrote:
Some guy was talking about this ridiculously cheesy C:SM free transport spam list:

Gladius Strike Force Battle Company:

Pedro Kantor
Captain with boltpistol and power fist
Chaplain

2 - 5 man devastator squads. Each has 3 missile launchers with flakk and 1 lascannon
6 - 5 man tactical squads. 4 have missile launchers; 2 have plasma cannons
2 assault squads on foot. Each has a meltabomb sarge and 2 flamers

1st company task force: 4 - 5 man sternguard veteran squads

Free rhinos, 2 of which have dozer blades.

Sorry bro but this list is actually just a terrible version of way better battle company lists. if this is your cheese you need to hit up some better gt's

By the current standards of 40k, that list is fairly tame...

Don't get me wrong, it'll beat the snot out of CSM and IG, but so does everything else.

I played against an Iron Warriors player in 30k with three Medusas, 9x Quad Mortars with Phosphex Cannisters and a whole bunch of Tyrant Siege Terminators.

It was long, incredibly boring and very one sided.

 Selym wrote:

ERJAK wrote:

 Peregrine wrote:
Some guy was talking about this ridiculously cheesy C:SM free transport spam list:

Gladius Strike Force Battle Company:

Pedro Kantor
Captain with boltpistol and power fist
Chaplain

2 - 5 man devastator squads. Each has 3 missile launchers with flakk and 1 lascannon
6 - 5 man tactical squads. 4 have missile launchers; 2 have plasma cannons
2 assault squads on foot. Each has a meltabomb sarge and 2 flamers

1st company task force: 4 - 5 man sternguard veteran squads


Free rhinos, 2 of which have dozer blades.

Sorry bro but this list is actually just a terrible version of way better battle company lists. if this is your cheese you need to hit up some better gt's

By the current standards of 40k, that list is fairly tame...

Don't get me wrong, it'll beat the snot out of CSM and IG, but so does everything else.

Actually that list is better than it looks at a glance. 10 objective secured units in rhinos are going to take a lot of objectives, and 14 rhinos are going to create a lot of obstacles and block Los. I can see a lot of double unit objective camping and winning through victory points massing up, rather than going for a turn two tabling.

 Selym wrote:

ERJAK wrote:

 Peregrine wrote:
Some guy was talking about this ridiculously cheesy C:SM free transport spam list:

Gladius Strike Force Battle Company:

Pedro Kantor
Captain with boltpistol and power fist
Chaplain

2 - 5 man devastator squads. Each has 3 missile launchers with flakk and 1 lascannon
6 - 5 man tactical squads. 4 have missile launchers; 2 have plasma cannons
2 assault squads on foot. Each has a meltabomb sarge and 2 flamers

1st company task force: 4 - 5 man sternguard veteran squads

Free rhinos, 2 of which have dozer blades.

Sorry bro but this list is actually just a terrible version of way better battle company lists. if this is your cheese you need to hit up some better gt's

By the current standards of 40k, that list is fairly tame...

Don't get me wrong, it'll beat the snot out of CSM and IG, but so does everything else.

Peregrine is having a bit of a joke as that's the list Traditio runs. I'm sure he's well aware that it isn't the cheesiest thing in existence and is just poking a bit of fun at Traditio's expense.
Most likely in response to this comment:

 Traditio wrote:
The most memorable cheese list I had the misfortune of playing against. Not the cheesiest I've played against, but it's the one that's most memorable for the sheer raeg it induced.

White scars bikers (with grav, as I recall). Sternguard in drop pods with combimeltas. Thunderfire cannons.

Which is also a pretty tame list.

 Traditio wrote:

chalkobob wrote:Maybe. Though what I listed, with perhaps the exception of khan, are not auto-takes.

Suicide melta sternguard aren't considered auto-takes?

No - too expensive for suicide - lots of wasted points. Never use your special bolter ammo. 2 attacks in cc never used. Command squad does it better for cheaper - so does a skyhammer dev squad with 4 MM.


Automatically Appended Next Post:

 Otto Weston wrote:
A friend of mine has begun modelling and painting the following list -- not sure if its full cheese but it feels cheesy to me xD

1.5kpts
Ghostkeel Wing (3 Ghostkeels)
Heavy Retribution Cadre (The one with 2x Stormsurges and a Ghostkeel)

Upgrades include the massive guns for the Stormsurges, interceptor, shields and BS2 overwatch.

What's the verdict? Cheese or not?

This is what actual cheese looks like.

This was 6th edition, about 2 years ago, and a learning game. Unlike many stories, this is my own list.

My opponent brought a cool, fluffy Ultramarine list. It had Marneus Calgar, and lots of units I don't normally see.

I brought 3 Wave Serpents, one with Wraithguard, one with Fire Dragons, and one with Dire Avengers, a Wraithknight, a Crimson Hunter, some Dark Reapers, and a 2+ rerollable Autarch on jetbike.

I was an complete and utter ass who posted stupid crap insulting people on the internet at the time, and ran cheese against everything because I couldn't win any other way. I'm surprised I wasn't slapped for that stunt. The game was over so quick that we played another game, this time bringing my Nids. I got utterly rolled.

Anyway. That was one of the experiences that made me semi-aware that I was being a douche, and I stopped playing Eldar after that game. I still write up some cheesy lists, but only as theory or for games where cheese is expected.

Don't be like me back then. Be a good person.

I can now safely update mine.

Mission: Spoils of War, modded to be played short edge to short edge
Armies: IG (me) SM (opponent)

Preface note: My opponent claimed that I had been spamming tanks (I use six) and using cheesey lists and said that he wanted me to bring a none-cheese list.

I have a Macro Cannon as my back line schwereplunkt occupied by two Veteran sections, my Company Command section and a Conversion Beamer inquisitor. Two Exterminators for fire support, three units of Storm Troops for objective taking, a termy libby and six termies (the old plastic ones) for objective taking and threat distraction and a 5 man scout unit.

Opponent brings triple Vindicator linebreaker, Libby Conclave with 2 termy libbies and Sevrin Loth, 10th company formation with Telion, dual Las Preds, a Landraider Terminus Ultra with Chronus, jumppack micro smashfether chapter master, Vanhuard and multimelta/melta Tacs in a Rhino.

His libbies get Invisibility, Shifting Worldscape, Earthblood, Endurance, etc....

So turn one and I find my bunker buried in ruins that magically appear before it whilst the Conclave hides behind the now invisible Triple Vindicator unit. The Teminus Ultra thankfully fails to do much (that ruin may have blocked my LOS but it also gave me cover) and thankfully dies early on, but both my tanks die almost immediately and I am unable to move anything out of the bunker for the rest of the game, for fear that it will simply evaporate. The scouts vanish to amassed sniper fire and none of the deep striking units do anything of significance, the tomr troopers all dying within a turn of coming in and the termies managing to last a whole two turns before being wiped by Endurance Iron Arm libby might and mister mini smashfether.
The best part? My opponents "fluffy list" was a Charadons chapter army.
Better than the best part? He cheated and had over 2660 points in a 2K game. thankfully it is someone elses turn next time round.

Though, that dude's more being an ass than a cheesemonger.

 master of ordinance wrote:
I can now safely update mine.

Mission: Spoils of War, modded to be played short edge to short edge
Armies: IG (me) SM (opponent)

Preface note: My opponent claimed that I had been spamming tanks (I use six) and using cheesey lists and said that he wanted me to bring a none-cheese list.

I have a Macro Cannon as my back line schwereplunkt occupied by two Veteran sections, my Company Command section and a Conversion Beamer inquisitor. Two Exterminators for fire support, three units of Storm Troops for objective taking, a termy libby and six termies (the old plastic ones) for objective taking and threat distraction and a 5 man scout unit.

Opponent brings triple Vindicator linebreaker, Libby Conclave with 2 termy libbies and Sevrin Loth, 10th company formation with Telion, dual Las Preds, a Landraider Terminus Ultra with Chronus, jumppack micro smashfether chapter master, Vanhuard and multimelta/melta Tacs in a Rhino.

His libbies get Invisibility, Shifting Worldscape, Earthblood, Endurance, etc....

So turn one and I find my bunker buried in ruins that magically appear before it whilst the Conclave hides behind the now invisible Triple Vindicator unit. The Teminus Ultra thankfully fails to do much (that ruin may have blocked my LOS but it also gave me cover) and thankfully dies early on, but both my tanks die almost immediately and I am unable to move anything out of the bunker for the rest of the game, for fear that it will simply evaporate. The scouts vanish to amassed sniper fire and none of the deep striking units do anything of significance, the tomr troopers all dying within a turn of coming in and the termies managing to last a whole two turns before being wiped by Endurance Iron Arm libby might and mister mini smashfether.
The best part? My opponents "fluffy list" was a Charadons chapter army.
Better than the best part? He cheated and had over 2660 points in a 2K game. thankfully it is someone elses turn next time round.

Dude makes all of us Space Sharks look bad. Besides he had an Ultramarine and a Red Scorpion character in the army he calls "fluffy"? Yeah, not so much chees as an ass. I would have packed up and walked away.

When you play those players, you encourage them. Exercise your right to say "Go feth yourself."

But do it nicely and shake their hands!

And look them in the eye and smile!

Exactly!

Or take the most overpowered stuff in the game, get away with cheating, stomp their ass and then explain to them why being a douche isn't fun.

Or walk away, w/e.

 Selym wrote:
Or take the most overpowered stuff in the game, get away with cheating, stomp their ass and then explain to them why being a douche isn't fun.

Or walk away, w/e.

Given that he has just asked me for a 3K game i a week on Monday I am choosing this option. I reckon I can hit 5-6K if I grab a couple of new tanks.

Y'varah spam is pretty annoying. But these days its hard to even say.

 master of ordinance wrote:

Given that he has just asked me for a 3K game i a week on Monday I am choosing this option. I reckon I can hit 5-6K if I grab a couple of new tanks.

Just run a couple of War Conclave formations and you should be set

 master of ordinance wrote:

 Selym wrote:
Or take the most overpowered stuff in the game, get away with cheating, stomp their ass and then explain to them why being a douche isn't fun.

Or walk away, w/e.

Given that he has just asked me for a 3K game i a week on Monday I am choosing this option. I reckon I can hit 5-6K if I grab a couple of new tanks.

This time I'm not trying to be an ass. You need platoons on the field to complement your tanks. Seriously. Personally when we do army swaps, I run 2 demolishers, 2 vanquished and a pair of wyverns. 2 vendettas, heavy weapon teams and melta/plasma vets should be plenty for knocking down heavy infantry / armor. Meanwhile my blobs block DS sites and tarpit CC units. Bodies mate. Bodies. I've seen platoon Las guns delete 6 man hammernator units in one round of shooting with FRFSRF (in rapid fire range). More points of fragile tanks is an unwise investment.

The most cheese I've ever played (other than aspect warrior 3.5 ed elder with Ra and Fuegen with WS spam) is probably when I lost my temper with the cheeselists for apoc that the WAAC players were building abusing the removal of the 0-1 limits.

so my 3000pt list was:

1 imperial guard psyker in an autocannon chimera. with the invun save and camcloak with fw probably around 100pt back then.
2900 points of the artillery strikes from FW IA1.

a demolisher strike was 50pt, battlecannon 25pt the most expensive was IIRC 75pt

the artillery strikes rules were basically, place on T1, roll a die on a 5+ they come in that turn, then 4+ reducing by 1 each turn to a 2+ minimum. they come in after that every turn and scatter 2d6.

I turned the board into a re-enactment of the Somme.

jediknight129 wrote:
The most cheese I've ever played (other than aspect warrior 3.5 ed elder with Ra and Fuegen with WS spam) is probably when I lost my temper with the cheeselists for apoc that the WAAC players were building abusing the removal of the 0-1 limits.

so my 3000pt list was:

1 imperial guard psyker in an autocannon chimera. with the invun save and camcloak with fw probably around 100pt back then.
2900 points of the artillery strikes from FW IA1.

a demolisher strike was 50pt, battlecannon 25pt the most expensive was IIRC 75pt

the artillery strikes rules were basically, place on T1, roll a die on a 5+ they come in that turn, then 4+ reducing by 1 each turn to a 2+ minimum. they come in after that every turn and scatter 2d6.

I turned the board into a re-enactment of the Somme.

My god. That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard of.

mine was against 500pts of Admech

6 Cataphron destroyers with rapid fire plasma cannons aand grav cannons, a Tech priest and a war chicken.

jediknight129 wrote:
The most cheese I've ever played (other than aspect warrior 3.5 ed elder with Ra and Fuegen with WS spam) is probably when I lost my temper with the cheeselists for apoc that the WAAC players were building abusing the removal of the 0-1 limits.

so my 3000pt list was:

1 imperial guard psyker in an autocannon chimera. with the invun save and camcloak with fw probably around 100pt back then.
2900 points of the artillery strikes from FW IA1.

a demolisher strike was 50pt, battlecannon 25pt the most expensive was IIRC 75pt

the artillery strikes rules were basically, place on T1, roll a die on a 5+ they come in that turn, then 4+ reducing by 1 each turn to a 2+ minimum. they come in after that every turn and scatter 2d6.

I turned the board into a re-enactment of the Somme.

for 8th I just want to spam conscripts and plasma scions. 500 bodies in 1500 points leaves room for commanders, commissars and other goodies when the limit ups

I've got a batrep about it.
https://www.dakkadakka.com/dakkaforum/posts/list/729779.page

Scion commander with a plasma pistol
Regular commander
6 scion command squads all with plasma guns
4 basilisks
20 conscripts

1000 pt game.

In my case it was a huge blob of invisible wulfen with rerollable stormshield saves and all the other buffs you could ever imagine (to be fair the player was practicing for ETC). They had a space wolves librarian conclave that could dish out 6d6 S7 twin-linked ignores cover shots in the psychic phase. There also was a squad of GK interceptors that would shunt turn 1, then the wolfstar would electrodisplace and multicharge your whole army turn 1. There were a lot of people that got tabled first turn without getting to do anything..

I managed to beat the list once using some Tau though! I had:

- Etheral
- 1 Crisis
- 10 Kroot
- Imperial Bastion, Escape Hatch

- Drone Net Formation with 16 marker drones

- Heavy Retribution Cadre Formation, 3 Ghostkeels, 2 Stormsurges

- 5 Sisters of Silence

Blasted away the units he used for electrodisplacing using SMS and interceptor and stripped his buffs with the sisters of silence thanks to the escape hatch. I still lost an entire stormsurge to the psychic shooting though, and the game was very close in the end.. I also demolished 2 Imperial Knights in a single turn, 2 times, felt great.

I just played 750 pts against the following

Magnus
Ahriman
2x Exalted Sorcerer on Disc

I would even have won on objectives, but I decided to fight everything... because it would have been boring otherwise.

Just armies build around lots of multiple Wraithknights and invisibility and heals. Biggest bullcrap lists ever.

Or Duo/Triptides below 1/1.5K points in "casual" games.