Idris Elba and Tilda Swansen as a Djinn and a literature professor, as he tries to get her to make 3 wishes and she points out how that never ends well.
Doesn't quite stick the landing but some amazing visuals and fun history.
Something that really bugged me...
Spoiler:
Early we see Sawnsen's character hallucinating magical figures and she later talks about creating an imaginary best friend. But this set up never pays off, if the Djinn is supposed to be her hallucination/fantasy (which would be a huge let down for the audience) it's never followed up on.
This is an incredibly funny, campy, and downright self-aware monster flick. The opening is agonizingly slow and gimmicky and runs for way to long, but once 'Hero' shows up things just take off to the races and this is everything you want in a good fun B-Movie.
Finally got around to Cronos (1993), Guillermo Del Toro's feature debut. It is his take on a vampire story and like much of his work is a mix of dark and sentimental. It reminded me of those old Steven Spielburg's Amazing Stories from back in the day, just a bit longer, though it goes by at a brisk pace. Watched the trailer for it afterward and it makes it seem like this big grand story with sweltering, operatic music but the film is actually very quiet and personal. It is a very nice little story and worth watching if you are a fan of del Toro and want to see some of his earlier work.
You'll never believe this but Ron Pearlman is in the movie.
FWIW Apple TV resurrected Amazing Stories and it's pretty good. Doesn't seem to have progressed past 1 season, although it also hasn't been officially cancelled.
Still, it's a handful of quality episodes that obviously all stand alone thanks to the format.
This is a Vin Diesel vehicle that pre-dates the F&F films. It also has Michelle Yeoh in it.
There is a plot and a story about a magical girl macguffin. The setting is mostly in Russia and former Soviet Republics as the main characters try to get across into America. Honestly, the movie barely holds together and makes very little sense, but the setting is kind of interesting if you are into Zona Alfa.
Spoiler:
This film is notable in that ......
serious spoiler here......
Vin Diesel dies! I think that is against his contract now.
It’s another “Are You Afraid Of The Dark” with bells on youth fright fest. And the Wikipedia shows it to be a spin off/elaboration on a V/H/S/ short film. Like Hobo with a Shotgun first debuted on one of the Grindhouse movies as a faux trailer.
It’s…OK, I guess. The young cast are pretty impressive, and it’s not one for kids due to some gore, body horror and a lot of swearing.
Actually, I’m going to upgrade the “OK, I guess” to “surprisingly good fun”. It’s not reinventing a genre or pushing boundaries, but I’ve been hooked throughout.
Our heroes are solid, the villain could compete with 90’s Dudebro Douches, the douchiest of all Dudebro Douches in cinema history.
Importantly? All practical effects. Not necessarily good practical effects, but plenty good enough to convince with just a mild suspension of disbelief.
If like me you grew up with Are You Afraid Of The Dark and Goosebumps, I think you’ll get a kick out of this, as it has their feel without having to pull any punches.
Minor complaints noting huge. Wasn't a fan of the kids or even any of the characters at all for the most part. Teens, yuck.
However, I enjoyed that the Deadites have rules as in how they are written and behave. The Deadites were the best part of this movie along with the swimming pool worth of blood.
I didn't like how the Necronomicon was found in their sub basement, which had been a bank vault at one point. But you do have to put the elements for the movie in the movie so it is what it is. I prefer the reboot to this new one if I were to put them in order but that's still 4th and 5th place for my list. Honestly what ever keeps these movies coming is fine so long as I get to see them.
You might enjoy it.
It was ok.
They used so much fake blood it was about a quarter of a million dollars of the films budget.
warhead01 wrote: didn't like how the Necronomicon was found in their sub basement, which had been a bank vault at one point.
Apparently the filmmakers are going with the approach that the part in Army of Darkness when Ash finds the three different Necronomicons wasn't just two decoys and the real one but three separate versions with this one being one of those other two; it is a different copy and not the one from the other films. Of course the director also said that with Bruce Campbell doing the voice on the record he liked to think that was Ash when he was still bouncing around time, which isn't canon so who knows?
I didn't consider that. Not sure what's cannon and what's not any more. But it was just a small gripe really, the story needed a Necronomicon to get that party started after all. Hadn't considered the other two either.
I will be buying it on DVD for sure to go with the others. I think the end was wild, the characters were so bloody.
More blood than a GWAR concert!
A well done Wild West shoot-em-up with an absolutely all star cast. The movie gives the main protagonists a lot of character while at the same time making them somewhat unsympathetic.
Somehow, a college project seems to have been accidentally released as a commercial film.
While I applaud any attempt to try something new, I felt this fell flat on its face. The off kilter camera angles and muffled dialogue, coupled with the grainy effect on the footage just seem to get in the way.
Weirdly, after around 20 minutes, where I already had my doubts, the power cut out.
Once everything was back up, I googled some other reviews to see if things picked up. The consensus was a resounding "not really," so I left it there.
This is one of those instances where just even skimming reviewers would have helped. Every bit I'd read about Skinamarink pretty much stated that it was an art house film made on a shoestring budget and would absolutely not be for everyone, or probably even most. It is more of an experiment than a conventional story.
Calling that movie arthouse is (to be generous) licking someone's bum.
I watched it all the way through out of sheer morbid curiosity, and in its case 'arthouse' is code for 'lazy.' Shoestring budget yes, but it's like they didn't have budget for anything but a camera and some marketing.
Idris Elba and Tilda Swansen as a Djinn and a literature professor, as he tries to get her to make 3 wishes and she points out how that never ends well.
Doesn't quite stick the landing but some amazing visuals and fun history.
A well done Wild West shoot-em-up with an absolutely all star cast. The movie gives the main protagonists a lot of character while at the same time making them somewhat unsympathetic.
Aye, I happened to catch that one again some night on TV a few months ago. As I had read stuff on Johnny Ringo late last year that added to the enjoyment. They seem to have taken their research seriously.
I'm not one to sit around reading credits or following the comings and goings of Hollywood actors, so I'm quite often faced with the recognition of "Wait, isn't that...?" Newly noticed on this viewing are Tom Hardy and Nikolaj Coster-Waldau.
LordofHats wrote: Calling that movie arthouse is (to be generous) licking someone's bum.
I watched it all the way through out of sheer morbid curiosity, and in its case 'arthouse' is code for 'lazy.' Shoestring budget yes, but it's like they didn't have budget for anything but a camera and some marketing.
I never said it was good. Still for as much as you both vehemently disliked it I've seen others who thought it was interesting in how it created mood and atmosphere with so little. Again, I'm not saying I agree with that but the one constant on the film is how polarizing it is, with the vast majority not taking to it. It is certainly an oddity and in the end will just be a footnote at best not some lost hidden gem. It has been a bit funny that reviewers have consistently pointed out that most people will not like it, including themselves, and yet people watch it and say "man I really didn't like that". It is like I said "this milk has soured" so you grabbed the glass, took a drink and recoiled saying "omg that milk has gone bad". Yeah, no kidding.
Edit: I had been trying to figure out why it did get even a limited release and the best I can come up with is that it was cheap and the hope was it might be another Paranormal Activity or Blair Witch Project that bizarrely went from tiny to huge, ensuring big returns.
LordofHats wrote: Calling that movie arthouse is (to be generous) licking someone's bum.
I watched it all the way through out of sheer morbid curiosity, and in its case 'arthouse' is code for 'lazy.' Shoestring budget yes, but it's like they didn't have budget for anything but a camera and some marketing.
I never said it was good. Still for as much as you both vehemently disliked it I've seen others who thought it was interesting in how it created mood and atmosphere with so little. Again, I'm not saying I agree with that but the one constant on the film is how polarizing it is, with the vast majority not taking to it. It is certainly an oddity and in the end will just be a footnote at best not some lost hidden gem. It has been a bit funny that reviewers have consistently pointed out that most people will not like it, including themselves, and yet people watch it and say "man I really didn't like that". It is like I said "this milk has soured" so you grabbed the glass, took a drink and recoiled saying "omg that milk has gone bad". Yeah, no kidding.
Edit: I had been trying to figure out why it did get even a limited release and the best I can come up with is that it was cheap and the hope was it might be another Paranormal Activity or Blair Witch Project that bizarrely went from tiny to huge, ensuring big returns.
Thing is, as a horror fan, "this won't be for everyone" is a constant refrain. Certainly when you plumb the depths and bring titles like The Human Centipede or A Serbian Film into the conversation it basically goes without saying.
By and large (A Serbian Film was my personal line in the sand) I've always been happy to watch and make my mind up.
What sets Skinamarink apart from those is that "it's not for everyone" in this context means "not for people who wouldn't sit and watch the menu animations on a DVD for an hour and a half, or aren't high." It lacks the very bones a movie needs to be a coherent creation. I get it, I can see what the point of the experiment is, to try and create a pervasive mood rather than tell a story, but that experiment fails IMO.
An unusual and interesting take on the whole Batman thing, and probably one of the best of these little animated films they've done in a while. A big part of that is probably down to them using an older animation style (I just can't get used to the style they use on the newer stuff), but it's also a genuinely decent movie that doesn't really have the usual run-time issues.
Azreal13 wrote: Thing is, as a horror fan, "this won't be for everyone" is a constant refrain. Certainly when you plumb the depths and bring titles like The Human Centipede or A Serbian Film into the conversation it basically goes without saying.
By and large (A Serbian Film was my personal line in the sand) I've always been happy to watch and make my mind up.
What sets Skinamarink apart from those is that "it's not for everyone" in this context means "not for people who wouldn't sit and watch the menu animations on a DVD for an hour and a half, or aren't high." It lacks the very bones a movie needs to be a coherent creation. I get it, I can see what the point of the experiment is, to try and create a pervasive mood rather than tell a story, but that experiment fails IMO.
That's great but absolutely changes nothing I said though I'm sure you feel better harping on a movie that really isn't worth it over and over just to let everyone know how little you think of it. We'll put a note on you're bio that you were a horror fan and yet somehow really, really didn't like a movie.
Azreal13 wrote: Thing is, as a horror fan, "this won't be for everyone" is a constant refrain. Certainly when you plumb the depths and bring titles like The Human Centipede or A Serbian Film into the conversation it basically goes without saying.
By and large (A Serbian Film was my personal line in the sand) I've always been happy to watch and make my mind up.
What sets Skinamarink apart from those is that "it's not for everyone" in this context means "not for people who wouldn't sit and watch the menu animations on a DVD for an hour and a half, or aren't high." It lacks the very bones a movie needs to be a coherent creation. I get it, I can see what the point of the experiment is, to try and create a pervasive mood rather than tell a story, but that experiment fails IMO.
That's great but absolutely changes nothing I said though I'm sure you feel better harping on a movie that really isn't worth it over and over just to let everyone know how little you think of it. We'll put a note on you're bio that you were a horror fan and yet somehow really, really didn't like a movie.
Whilst there are good ideas and concepts at play here, the acting is, sadly, pretty awful. And the end result is tellingly amateurish.
However, it’s not without its peculiar charm. I’d say just a bit of spit and polish could’ve elevated this somewhat, and for that I can genuinely respect it. If you can push past its overall low quality, I think you’ll appreciate this as a bold, if flawed, attempt at film making.
Certainly I’ve seen far, far worse movies come from Actual Budgets. And it feels like those behind this tried their best.
Just had a shot at arraying my DVDs, so my Amicus collection are properly ordered.
In doing so, I found a movie I didn’t know I had, called House of Witchcraft. Probably picked it up whilst drunk shopping on Amazon. Seems it’s an Italian one, so rather looking forward to sticking it up the spout.
Got two more ready for tomorrow. Both are interesting bits of movie trivia.
First? Ghosthouse. Another Italian classic. Second? Witchcraft.
What’s interesting about that? Well, in Italy, they’re known as Casa 3, and Casa 4.
But they’re not, as you might expect, claiming it be sequels to House and House 2. But claiming to be sequels to Evil Dead and Evil Dead 2, which were known as Casa and Casa 2.
Apparently, House 2 and House 3 are Casa 5 and Casa 6.
Oh Italy, you crazy!
Automatically Appended Next Post: Aaaaannnnd then I looked into the Zombi series.
Zombi is Dawn of the Dead, albeit an alternative cut. Then it goes crazy, with different territories releasing different movies under the Zombi/Zombie naming convention.
Scary thing is? I genuinely think I’ve seen most, if not all of them at some point.
Automatically Appended Next Post: Anyways.
House of Witchcraft
Somewhat unremarkable. Enjoyable if you’re into your 70’s and 80’s Italian no-budget horror films, but that’s about it. Curiously though, a noticeable lack of knockers wobbling about for no discernible reason.
A movie called House of Witchcraft from Italy made in the 70's and early 80's with no T&A? Typically if I see a witchcraft tie-in for any 70's or 80's movies I assume stupid amounts of T&A. I avoid the sub-genre now to some extent because of it. I mean it really feels like the perfect sub-genre for T&A and sleaze, YMMV of course.
I wonder if it is just the cut/version you have? It actually seems inconceivable to me that this movie is pointless T&A sleaze-free.
It could be a cut version, as it’s an old Vipco DVD, where the picture is set for non-widescreen TVs, and has the top and bottom banding. So a straight print transfer with no jiggery pokery/
Jumanji - 1995
Just watched this again for the first time in many many years.
It was ok, not traffic. It reminds me of a weird spin on Gremlins. The one feature I dislike the most was it has that Hollywood small town setting that feels like it's the same town as Gremlins or Monster Squad or Moral Oral for that matter. I didn't hate it but I think a better remake of the original would have been acceptable, just cleaned up a little. I did like the Jumanji board, it reminds me of Dr. Seuss. I like that a lot. I did enjoy the ending.
The Big Game hunter was really good as well. At the guns and Ammo shop. Asking for bullets for his gun finding out they have been out of production for like forever and all he says is " Damn" .
Genius.
We were hoping for something charming and heartwarming along the lines of Totoro. While this movie did have charm, it also had several flavors of nightmare fuel and some gross out stuff. While we enjoyed it, it wasn’t what my wife wanted to watch right before bed. And with the writers strike, there was no late night monologue to fall asleep to.
Easy E wrote: I was feeling a bit blue, so I decided to watch some animation. That usually cheers me up!
When the Wind Blows An elderly British couple in the country experience the after effects of a nuclear war.
.... well, that did not make me feel any better. Onto the next one.....
The Plague Dogs Two dogs escape from an animal testing facility. With the aid of a wily fox, they try to evade re-capture.
..... you have to be kidding me. I am feeling worse now than when I started watching animation! What is with this British Animation, Jerry?
With 'when the Wind Blows' at least you have the consolation that it could not happen the minute you get up from the sofa after watching the movie... can't imagine how much harder that stuff must have hit when it was hanging over everyone's heads in a quite literal sense. Legit stuff of nightmares.
Plague Dogs, on the other hands, is just torturous. It's gotta be hands-down one of the bleakest movies ever made or even imaginable, i watched it exactly once and probably will never do so again, gak is just too heavy for me, in that bad way that gets intrusive and clings to you for days. It's not even graphic or anything, just bleak and sad and getting worse every minute of runtime.
Taking a leave from sanity-blasting horror, i'm currently watching the BBC remake of All creatures great and small, which is set in the mid-1930s and is a slice-of-live light drama/light comedy mix about a young veterinarian that gets his first job in the practice of a slightly excentric old hand at the trade in the yorkshire dales. It is a remake of the popular BBC series that ran in the 1970s and has great production values and period costumes, as well as a refreshingly un-modernized script with small-stakes drama and a generally pleasant atmosphere. It's a 'slightly-worn flanell slippers' kind of show, you won't get cravings for it or be on the edge of your seat with tension, but i find it nicely relaxing.
This weekend somebody mentioned someone being called Rowena. I was very, very, very much tempted to get up and do the little Absurdly-Mocking-Rowena dance.
@BobtheInquisitor: Spirited Away is awesome (and I do not use that word lightly). And gets even better the more often one watches.
Right, as you were all watching cartoons, I watched a film for proper grown-ups.
Emanuelle (1974)
Young lady (Sylvia Kristel) is brought to Thailand by her husband who works for the French embassy. Their (husband and wife, not the French embassy's) goal for her is to learn about love, I suppose.
So this came on and I hadn't seen it in ages. As the film went on I realized how well I remember it (yes, even beyond the sex scenes). Must have seen it several times, but not in a while. But I watched a documentary on the film last year, so that gave it another layer. Not that there's all too many layers to the whole thing, obviously. Sylvia Kristel really isn't a great actress. But really well cast for the role.
But it's a classic, right? Gotta have seen Emanuelle. Don't bother with the "sequels" (I think 2 still had something to do with the first one in some way?), most of which are in name only. During the 80s, Emanuelle was to erotic films what Django was to Westerns - any film publisher would just plaster the name on their film willy-nilly.
But it's a classic, right? Gotta have seen Emanuelle. Don't bother with the "sequels" (I think 2 still had something to do with the first one in some way?), most of which are in name only. During the 80s, Emanuelle was to erotic films what Django was to Westerns - any film publisher would just plaster the name on their film willy-nilly.
Just for the fun of it, and to show how very much you are understating this, have a partial list from german wikipedia (figures that they had something to say on the matter ):
Emmanuelle mit Sylvia Kristel et al.
Emmanuelle (dt. Emanuela / Emmanuelle – Die Schule der Lust, 1974), mit Sylvia Kristel
Emmanuelle 2 – Garten der Liebe (Emmanuelle l’antivierge, übersetzt „Die Anti-Jungfrau,“ 1975), mit Sylvia Kristel in der Hauptrolle, die spätere „Emanuelle“ Laura Gemser in einer Nebenrolle
Goodbye Emmanuelle (1977), wieder mit Sylvia Kristel in der Hauptrolle
Emmanuelle 4 (1984), Sylvia Kristel teilt sich die Hauptrolle mit ihrer Nachfolgerin Mia Nygren; Emmanuelle gibt sich mit Hilfe der plastischen Chirurgie ein völlig neues Aussehen, die verwandelte Emmanuelle wird dann von Nygren gespielt
Emmanuelle 5 (dt. Emmanuelle – Im Harem des Prinzen, 1987), mit Monique Gabrielle
Emmanuelle 6 (dt. Emmanuelle – Amazone des Dschungels, 1988), mit Natalie Uher
Emmanuelle 7 (dt. Digital Love, 1993), wieder mit Sylvia Kristel
Emmanuelle mit Marcela Walerstein
Marcela Walerstein als „junge Emmanuelle“ in einer siebenteiligen französischen TV-Filmreihe aus dem Jahre 1993. Sylvia Kristel tritt in einer Nebenrolle auf.
Emmanuelle in Tibet (Éternelle Emmanuelle, 1993)
Emmanuelle in Afrika (La revanche d’Emmanuelle, 1993)
Emmanuelle in Venedig (Emmanuelle à Venise, 1993)
Emmanuelles Freundin (L'amour d’Emmanuelle, 1993)
Emmanuelles Zauber (Magique Emmanuelle, 1993)
Emmanuelles Parfüm (Le parfum d’Emmanuelle, 1993)
Emmanuelles Geheimnis (Le secret d’Emmanuelle, 1993)
Emmanuelle mit Krista Allen („Emmanuelle in Space“)
Krista Allen spielt die Emmanuelle in einer siebenteiligen TV-Filmreihe mit Science-Fiction-Aufhängern aus dem Jahre 1994, im englischen Original Emmanuelle in Space genannt:
Emmanuelle – Botschafterin der Liebe (aka First Contact/Queen of the Galaxy, 1994)
Emmanuelle 2 – Im Rausch der Sinne (Emmanuelle 2: A World of Desire, 1994)
Emmanuelle 3 – Lektionen in Liebe (Emmanuelle 3: A Lesson in Love, 1994)
Emmanuelle 4 – Geheime Wünsche (Emmanuelle 4: Concealed Fantasy, 1994)
Emmanuelle 5 – Wilde Träume (Emmanuelle 5: A Time to Dream, 1994)
Emmanuelle 6 – Ein tiefes Verlangen (Emmanuelle 6: One Final Fling, 1994)
Emmanuelle 7 – Was ist Liebe (Emmanuelle 7: The Meaning of Love, 1994)
Emmanuelle mit Holly Sampson
Holly Sampson spielt die Emmanuelle in einer US-amerikanischen Video-Filmreihe:
Emmanuelle 2000: Aus nächster Nähe (Being Emmanuelle, 2000)
Emmanuelle 2000: Nackte Tatsachen (Emmanuelle and the Art of Love, 2000)
Emmanuelle 2000: Zurück im Paradies (Emmanuelle in Paradise, 2000)
Emmanuelle 2000: Ein heißes Weekend (Jewel of Emmanuelle, 2000)
Emmanuelle 2000: Intime Begegnungen (Emmanuelle’s Intimate Encounters, 2000)
Emmanuelle 2000: Eine Frage der Lust (Emmanuelle’s Sensual Pleasures, 2001)
Emmanuelle 2000: Pikante Lektionen (Emmanuelle Pie, 2003)
Emmanuelle 2000 (2001)
Die Reihe wurde auch als DVD-Sammelbox Emmanuelle: Ultimate Erotic Selection – Lust auf Abenteuer veröffentlicht.
Emmanuelle mit Natasja Vermeer
Natasja Vermeer spielt die Emmanuelle in einer US-amerikanischen Video-Filmreihe:
Emmanuelle the Private Collection: Sex Goddess (2003)
Emmanuelle the Private Collection: Emmanuelle vs. Dracula (2004)
Emmanuelle the Private Collection: Sex Talk (2004)
Emmanuelle the Private Collection: The Sex Lives of Ghosts (2004)
Emmanuelle the Private Collection: Sexual Spells (2004)
Emmanuelle the Private Collection: The Art of Ecstasy (aka Die Kunst der Ekstase, 2006)
Emmanuelle the Private Collection: Jesse’s Secret Desires (2006)
Emmanuelle Tango (2006)
Emmanuelle mit Allie Haze
Allie Haze spielt die Emmanuelle in einer siebenteiligen US-amerikanischen Video-Filmreihe:
Emmanuelle Through Time: Emmanuelle’s Skin City (2011)
Emmanuelle Through Time: Emmanuelle’s Sexy Bite (2011)
Emmanuelle Through Time: Sex, Chocolate & Emmanuelle (2011)
Emmanuelle Through Time: Rod Steele 0014 & Naked Agent 0069 (2011)
Emmanuelle Through Time: Emmanuelle’s Supernatural Activities (2011)
Emmanuelle Through Time: Emmanuelle’s Sex Tales (2011)
Emmanuelle Through Time: Emmanuelle’s Forbidden Pleasures (2011)
Andere Emmanuelle-Filme / Plagiate / Parodien / Dokumentationen / daran angelehnte Filme
Frankreich:
Emmanuelle (auch Mi-vie, 1968), Kurzfilm-Drama
Emanuele – Im Teufelskreis der Leidenschaft (Je suis frigide... pourquoi? auch Im Garten der Wollust – Pourquoi?, 1972), für Erwachsene[2]
Perverse Emanuelle (Tendre et perverse Emanuelle, 1973), Thriller mit Norma Kastel
Nea – Ein Mädchen entdeckt die Liebe (Néa auch A Young Emmanuelle, 1976), Drama mit Ann Zacharias (Frankreich, Deutschland)
Emanuela 77 (La marge, 1976), Drama mit Sylvia Kristel
Emanuelle und Lolita (Emanuelle e Lolita, 1978), mit Nieves Navarro als Emanuelle
Emmanuelle geht nach Cannes (Emmanuelle à Cannes, 1980), mit Olinka Hardiman als Marilyn, f. Erw.
Emmanuelle – Im Teufelskreis der Leidenschaft (Le Journal érotique d'une Thailandaise auch Emanuele 3, 1980), Abenteuerfilm f. Erw. mit Sylvie Cointre (Frankreich, Italien, Hongkong)
La vie érotique de la grenouille (2003), TV-Film mit Agathe de La Boulaye als Emmanuelle
An Erotic Success: The Making of 'Emmanuelle' (2007), Video-Dokumentation
Italien:
Io, Emmanuelle (1969), Drama mit Erika Blanc als Emmanuelle
Black Emanuelle, eine italienische „Emanuelle“-Filmreihe
Foltergarten der Sinnlichkeit (Emanuelle e Françoise le sorelline, 1975, Regie: Joe D’Amato) Thriller mit Rosemarie Lindt als Emanuelle
Laura (Laure auch Emmanuelle für immer, 1976), Drama mit Annie Belle und Emmanuelle Arsan (Italien, Frankreich)
Annie Belle – Zur Liebe geboren (La fine dell’innocenza auch Blue Belle/Teenage Emanuelle, 1976), Drama mit Annie Belle (Ital., Gbr.)
Emanuela – Dein wilder Erdbeermund (Inibizione, 1976), Drama mit Claudine Beccarie
Ecco lingua d’argento (engl. Emmanuelle’s Silver Tongue, 1976), Komödie mit Nadia Cassini als Emmanuelle[3]
Die Zuchtfarm der Sklaven (Emanuelle bianca e nera, 1976) Mit Malisa Longo als „White Emanuelle“[4]
Yellow Emanuelle (Il mondo dei sensi di Emy Wong auch Emanuelle – Die Sucht der Sinne, 1977, Regie: Bitto Albertini) Drama mit Chai Lee
Intime Beichte einer Frau (Il mondo porno di due sorelle auch Emanuelle And Joanna, 1979), Drama mit Sherry Buchanan als Emanuela
Quella porcacciona di mia moglie (engl. Teenage Emmanuelle, 1981), mit Catherine Ringer als Emanuelle (Ital., Frankr.), f. Erw.
Tradita a morte (engl. Lady Emanuelle, 1989), Drama mit Malù als Emanuelle
Deutschland – 3 Komödien, die mit dem Charakter Emmanuelle nichts zu tun haben:
Liebesmarkt (engl. Emanuelle Meets the Wife Swappers, 1973), Komödie
Nackt und keß am Königssee (auch Emanuelle in Oberbayern, 1977), Komödie für Erwachsene[5]
Blutjunge Biester … zu allem bereit (auch Prall und drall in Oberbayern/Emmanuelles Töchter, 1984), Komödie
Großbritannien:
Emmanuelle Goes Greek (griech. Roxani, i odysseia tou sex, 1976), Drama mit Natalie Danika
Mach’ weiter, Emmanuelle (Carry on Emmanuelle, 1978), Komödie mit Suzanne Danielle als Emmanuelle Prevert
Emmanuelle in Soho (1981), mit Angie Quick als „Emmanuelle of Soho“
Emmanuelle: A Hard Look (2000), Dokumentation über die Emmanuelle Filme mit Sylvia Kristel, Laura Gemser etc.
The Dark Side of Porn – Hunting Emmanuelle (2006), Dokumentations-Serie mit einer Emmanuelle Episode (Staffel 2, Folge 3)
USA:
Emanuelle im Lustschloß der Sinnlichkeit (The Journey of O, 1976), f. Erw.
Daughters of Emmanuelle (1983), f. Erw.
Die verdorbenen Mädchen vom Mars (Bad Girls from Mars auch Emmanuelle in Hollywood, 1990), Komödie mit Edy Williams als Emanuelle
The Joys of Emmanuelle, Parts 1–3 (2001), Video-Kurz-Dokumentationen zu den ersten drei Emmanuelle-Filmen[6]
Emmanuelle in Rio (2003), TV-Drama mit Ludmilla Ferraz als Emmanuelle
Soft Sell: Emmanuelle in America (2007), Video-Dokumentation
Emmanuelle in Wonderland (2012), Komödie mit Allie Haze als Emmanuelle (USA, Thailand, Ägypten, Brasilien)
Today is Yesterday Tomorrow (2012), Komödie mit Allie Haze als Emmanuelle
Hong Kong:
Li san jiao wei zhen di yu men (auch The Dragon Lives Again, 1977); Action-Komödie, in der Bruce Lee (gespielt von Siu-Lung Leung) neben anderen Film-Figuren auch Emmanuelle trifft[7]
Heung Gong Ngaai Maan Nau (auch Hong Kong Emmanuelle/Xiang Gang Ai Man Niu, 1977), Drama mit Deborah Dik
In den Klauen des C.I.A. (auch Kung Fu Emanuelle/Ai man niu huo bing gong fu liang, 1982), Action – hat nichts mit dem Charakter der Emanuelle zu tun (Hong Kong, Spanien)
Emmanuelle in Hong Kong (Heung Gong ngaai maan nau ji sau sing pui yuk, 2003), Drama mit Crystal Sun als Emmanuelle
Japan:
Tôkyô Emmanuelle fujin: kojin kyôju (1975), mit Kumi Taguchi
Wilde Emmanuelle im Paradies der Lust (auch Emmanuelle in Tokyo/Tokyo Emmanuelle fujin, 1976), mit Kumi Taguchi
Koko Emanuelle: nureta doyobi (1978), Drama
andere:
The Daughter of Emanuelle (La fille d'Emmanuelle, 1975), mit Greta Vayan als Emanuelle (Belgien, Frankreich, Italien), f. Erw.
Emanuelle Tropical (Brasilien, 1977)
Madame O und ihre ganz teuren Mädchen (Agent 69 Jensen i Skorpionens tegn auch Emmanuelle in Denmark, DK, 1977), Komödie f. Erw.
A Filha de Emmanuelle (Brasilien, 1980), Drama
Brown Emmanuelle (Philippinen, 1982), mit Myrna Castillo
Las orgías inconfesables de Emmanuelle (Spanien, 1982), Drama mit Muriel Montossé als Emmanuelle
Seoul Emmanuelle (Südkorea, 1993), Thriller
Well that's 2 hours I'm not getting back, utter utter drek
To be honest, I have the same amount of sympathy for you here as I would an Ancient Greek who decided, against all myth, legend, advice and that, to have a peep at Medusa.
It really is a terrible movie. Most in the second and third thirds. Like, the first third of the movie isn't bad. Except for their decision to 'let's just go to this random planet we know nothing about with tens of thousands of lives at stake because religion metaphors or some banal gak we hope you won't look too hard at.'
...and I haven't seen it a single time! Life's not fair.
@Easy E: Quite probably so. I was thinking if I'd ratehr watch all the Marvel films in a row or all the Emanuelle films. Pretty sure I'd go for the second option.
Pretty sure I wrote about this one before. It's about a group of boys aged 16 or so during the last weeks of the war. They sign up for military service, because that's what they were brought up to do and eventually they even get called in. After woefully short training they are moved to a combat unit, along with old veterans and more kids. A well-meaning company commander is able to have the group stationed to guard a tiny little bridge in their home town.
Powerful film, that. It's pretty much like Starship Troopers, if Starship Troopers wasn't a satire on propaganda, militarism and all of that. Other than Starship Troopers they also got a bunch of good actors. Despite the heavy subject it's surprisingly "easy to sit through". 98 minutes, and more action-y than I remembered it to be. The best part though is the establishing scenes about the boys, how they interact with each other, about their home lives. It's interesting to see how all the adults try to either cope with the situation of the front lines drawing nearer or try to flee, but the boys don't even seem to notice as they're busy being teenagers.
Watch It. It's really good.
Apparently there's a remake from 2008 by a German private tv channel, and from what I read it's about as good as these factors would imply. So do watch the original. Back then it won a golden globe and was nominated for an Academy Award too.
LordofHats wrote: It really is a terrible movie. Most in the second and third thirds. Like, the first third of the movie isn't bad. Except for their decision to 'let's just go to this random planet we know nothing about with tens of thousands of lives at stake because religion metaphors or some banal gak we hope you won't look too hard at.'
It has Matrix sequel Syndrome: between the already-not-stellar, but passable Prometheus and this, about three movies worth of exposition and material was put out in comics, none of which the average moviegoer had any idea about. As a result of this, a script that barely clears the bar as a typical stalker monster movie dissolves into an unintelligible mess overladen with deep philosophical discussions nobody understands because half the argument happened off-screen. The end result is a dumb movie with predictable twists and confusing dialogue.
Was looking forward to this one, I'm a big fan of the original (as in 2013, not the original originals which goes without saying.)
After a typically brutal Evil Dead opening, we step back 24 hours, and relocate, in one of the big departures from the previous installments, to the city. LA to be precise.
After an establishing period where we get to know the protagonists, we transition into what I felt was the weakest part of the film, not only because the sequence of events is tenuous at best (forgivable, especially as essentially any story becomes a story because unlikely things occur) but also because we see Peter Parker get bitten by the spider again. (Figuratively speaking.)
At this point I was bored, it all felt a bit like the film was going to rely on its new location and simply tell the same story we've seen many times before.
To a point, this is true, but thankfully the execution of the back half of the movie is worthy of the Evil Dead mantle. At this point, that almost means two things, the almost camp, OTT nature of the Campbell era, and the far darker, more brutal modern films.
Rise manages to keep a foot in both camps though. The gore, including a tribute to The Shining, is excessive to the point of bordering on hilarity. The violence, especially the malicious glee the deadites inflict on their own host bodies, is enough to make your toes curl (although thankfully no fingernail stuff which is my own personal pain point.)
It's not perfect, but Rise does enough in the end, it's just a shame it treads a little more old ground than I'd like to get there. Hopefully it isn't another decade before the next one.
LordofHats wrote: It really is a terrible movie. Most in the second and third thirds. Like, the first third of the movie isn't bad. Except for their decision to 'let's just go to this random planet we know nothing about with tens of thousands of lives at stake because religion metaphors or some banal gak we hope you won't look too hard at.'
It has Matrix sequel Syndrome: between the already-not-stellar, but passable Prometheus and this, about three movies worth of exposition and material was put out in comics, none of which the average moviegoer had any idea about. As a result of this, a script that barely clears the bar as a typical stalker monster movie dissolves into an unintelligible mess overladen with deep philosophical discussions nobody understands because half the argument happened off-screen. The end result is a dumb movie with predictable twists and confusing dialogue.
No amount of extra material would ever pull whatever nonsense that movie was trying to make together.
In comparison, Prometheus was a medicore film that at least put real effort into trying to be deep. It didn't come together at all sure, but it tried. Covernant was just lazy.
This is good, really really good. I’ll admit the opening credits mentioning “The Litecoin Foundation” very nearly put me off, as I’m stupidly adverse to crypto as a rule.
But I’m glad I didn’t. Because as said, this is really, really good. And definitely worth a watch.
LordofHats wrote: It really is a terrible movie. Most in the second and third thirds. Like, the first third of the movie isn't bad. Except for their decision to 'let's just go to this random planet we know nothing about with tens of thousands of lives at stake because religion metaphors or some banal gak we hope you won't look too hard at.'
It has Matrix sequel Syndrome: between the already-not-stellar, but passable Prometheus and this, about three movies worth of exposition and material was put out in comics, none of which the average moviegoer had any idea about. As a result of this, a script that barely clears the bar as a typical stalker monster movie dissolves into an unintelligible mess overladen with deep philosophical discussions nobody understands because half the argument happened off-screen. The end result is a dumb movie with predictable twists and confusing dialogue.
No amount of extra material would ever pull whatever nonsense that movie was trying to make together.
In comparison, Prometheus was a medicore film that at least put real effort into trying to be deep. It didn't come together at all sure, but it tried. Covernant was just lazy.
If you want actually-good alien movie things, and can't wait for Alien:Romulus which is now supposedly filming, i can recommend the handful of short stories that emerged as the result of am competition held on occasion of the Alien franchises' 40th birthday. These are actually good, and legally available on Youtube for free:
It's perfectly OK. In 2 days I will remember nothing about this though. It feels rather disjointed and direct-to-video. Or like a youtube special or something (not the least due to the digital look). The actors all do a fine job and are well cast for their roles. First time I saw the Louise Belcher voice lady in anything non-Bob's-Burgers, but I find he voice to make things endearing (probably because I like Bob's Burgers a whole lot). The robot looked like it would suck, but it ended up being a rather fun addition. So basically they do all the things the writers considered people expecting them to do and the song in the end was rubbish.
It's an OK film though. Which probably makes it all the more evil, because it's feeding off nostalgia and it's okay? Somehow I'm pretty sure that's rather evil, but I can't quite put my finger on it yet. Anyway. It's okay. But also utterly unremarkable.
I have to add that I watched this on Netflix, which seems to make me like films less than if I'd caught them on TV by accident. Are you familiar with this? Watching films on netflix always feels a bit stale and like doing a chore as opposed to linear tv, which weirdly feels like having more of a choice. Like being allowed to turn it off and then it's gone and not one more thing added to the digital to-do/consume pile half-finished.
Sigur wrote: Watched Cross of Iron. As good as it ever was.
Bill and Ted Face the Music (2020)
It's perfectly OK. In 2 days I will remember nothing about this though. It feels rather disjointed and direct-to-video. Or like a youtube special or something (not the least due to the digital look). The actors all do a fine job and are well cast for their roles. First time I saw the Louise Belcher voice lady in anything non-Bob's-Burgers, but I find he voice to make things endearing (probably because I like Bob's Burgers a whole lot). The robot looked like it would suck, but it ended up being a rather fun addition. So basically they do all the things the writers considered people expecting them to do and the song in the end was rubbish.
It's an OK film though. Which probably makes it all the more evil, because it's feeding off nostalgia and it's okay? Somehow I'm pretty sure that's rather evil, but I can't quite put my finger on it yet. Anyway. It's okay. But also utterly unremarkable.
I have to add that I watched this on Netflix, which seems to make me like films less than if I'd caught them on TV by accident. Are you familiar with this? Watching films on netflix always feels a bit stale and like doing a chore as opposed to linear tv, which weirdly feels like having more of a choice. Like being allowed to turn it off and then it's gone and not one more thing added to the digital to-do/consume pile half-finished.
Whilst I don’t disagree with your summary of Face the Music?
I submit a Defence that it didn’t try to reinvent the the wheel, and the important beats were all there. Sadly not quite the sum of its parts, it remains a decent enough Latter Day Sequel, and as is important with such things, didn’t take a big old dump on the originals. And to be honest, it not being quite as good as it’s predecessors, given how good those are, is not a massive crime
Most importantly? It was made with love for the material, and not a somewhat cynical attempt to keep hold of the rights
Sigur wrote: Watched Cross of Iron. As good as it ever was.
Bill and Ted Face the Music (2020)
It's perfectly OK. In 2 days I will remember nothing about this though. It feels rather disjointed and direct-to-video. Or like a youtube special or something (not the least due to the digital look). The actors all do a fine job and are well cast for their roles. First time I saw the Louise Belcher voice lady in anything non-Bob's-Burgers, but I find he voice to make things endearing (probably because I like Bob's Burgers a whole lot). The robot looked like it would suck, but it ended up being a rather fun addition. So basically they do all the things the writers considered people expecting them to do and the song in the end was rubbish.
It's an OK film though. Which probably makes it all the more evil, because it's feeding off nostalgia and it's okay? Somehow I'm pretty sure that's rather evil, but I can't quite put my finger on it yet. Anyway. It's okay. But also utterly unremarkable.
I have to add that I watched this on Netflix, which seems to make me like films less than if I'd caught them on TV by accident. Are you familiar with this? Watching films on netflix always feels a bit stale and like doing a chore as opposed to linear tv, which weirdly feels like having more of a choice. Like being allowed to turn it off and then it's gone and not one more thing added to the digital to-do/consume pile half-finished.
Whilst I don’t disagree with your summary of Face the Music?
I submit a Defence that it didn’t try to reinvent the the wheel, and the important beats were all there. Sadly not quite the sum of its parts, it remains a decent enough Latter Day Sequel, and as is important with such things, didn’t take a big old dump on the originals. And to be honest, it not being quite as good as it’s predecessors, given how good those are, is not a massive crime
Most importantly? It was made with love for the material, and not a somewhat cynical attempt to keep hold of the rights
No, you're absolutely right there, and I liked the film overall, I just disliked everything else in the world at the time I wrote that stuff above I think. The film is fine as just what you described above.
Listened to the first few hours or so of Matthew Perry's autobiohgraphy. Slightly annoying. But it's interesting to see how much of Chandler Bing is actually autobiographical.
Curiosity got the better of us. Turns out it was delightfully cheesy. We got a lot of laughs out of the film. My one complaint is that the film didn’t tone down the score and zoom in on the actress giving her terrible “Indianapolis” monologue.
Mad Doc Grotsnik wrote: So autobiographical, that when the “great comedic actor” Matthew Perry tells a joke, nobody present has ever laughed?
Oh, you. I think he's a talented dude in his field. Being a comedic actor must be weird. Actor to begin with, but specializing in comedy must be extra weird.
Being a lumpy grumpys blerk this sort of thing isn't really my cuppa but I watched the first one with my Mum as part of a vague attempt to balance the being 2-0 down in the providing grand children game so we did Disney and Disney like movies instead
This one is a bit of a lazy cash grab, there are a few moments of narrativium based pokes at story telling but really nothing that hasn't been done before, although Ms Adams is watchable in almost anything
Jungle Cruise
Emily is purty, The Rock is funny, Jack Whitehall needs feeding into a wood chipper, passable enough but clearly an attempt to do a Pirates re-boot without the hassle of Depp
Jack Whitehall needs feeding into a wood chipper on sheer principle.
I’ve no idea how that scrawny streak of unfunny micturant has a career, let alone was nominated and inexpiclably won king of comedy on multiple occasions.
Mad Doc Grotsnik wrote: Jack Whitehall
I’ve no idea how that scrawny streak of unfunny micturant has a career,
I watched him live once. Aside from amateurs at the comedy club, he's the least funny person I've personally witnessed on stage. And I paid to see him! I wanted him to be funny. He wasn't.
Mad Doc Grotsnik wrote: More an observation that none of the cast laugh at Chandler’s jokes - it’s only audience reaction
Oh, that. Surely there must have been some random cut to Monica or Rachel at least smirking about his jokes at some point. Or maybe his friends are rather annoyed with his constant joking around all the time.
Didn't watch Disenchanted (until halfway through I thought you meant the Matt Goenig tv show), but I did watch Enchanted a bunch of years back and found it alright.
Jack Whitehall. Yeah, I have no idea why he shows up everywhere, or used to during the latter 2010s. First I saw him was on QI, then I watched a few episodes of the show in which he travels with his father. I guess he works if he's a sort of 'relateable straight guy with boyish charm' when put next to some wacky person's antics? No idea. What I do know is that the Germans (private TV ones too, so the worst sort) did a rip-off of that with a complete tit of a former comedian a few years back. That was proper crap.
Perhaps the first movie in a long time where Ryan Reynolds did not annoy me to the point of disliking the movie. Overall, a harmless little family film that is fun enough.
The Mr. Mime interrogation is priceless and worth watching the rest of the movie.
That is a film which sits in my list of “Films With No Right To Be As Good As They Are”.
Now, that list doesn’t mean the film is necessarily good, let alone a classic (but it can, ref A Knight’s Tale), just that by all rights it should’ve been a massive steaming pile (ref Suicide Squad) but somehow turns out perfectly entertaining (ref Detective Pikachu).
I think it's a perfectly fine movie. Reynolds is another one of those actors that performs best when the director keeps tight reins on them (ref Jim Carey), and since it's only his voice in this movie then they picked his best work and ditched the baggage.
Yes, Detective Pikatchu was perfectly OK. I just can't bear to see more films coming along with an interesting premise for the first half or so, then run out of ideas and go with a "hollywood film plot with fight/explosion in the end" story for the second half. Just feels like a let-down.
Suzume. Latest from Makoto Shinkai(your name, weathering with you). More action packed and maybe bit less humour than previous ones though cracked me still up. Music score less memorable overall.
Once again struct how japanese stories give out questions but don't spell out. Who was the talking cat? God like one guy said?
Have my suspicion but if right new questions born.
Overall enjoyed it though. Style felt different enough to previous ones to feel fresh but still Makoto style.
Now to wait blyray with hopefully pile of making of bonuses etc. Maybe script like i got for weathering with you.
Just watched Quantumania. Entertaining and on a similar level to Ragnarok. I find Paul Rudd to be entertainingly charming, and greatly enjoyed his schtick again.
Amazing visuals, little to no plot that makes sense and massive and constant deus ex machina. I can confidently say that some things happened and there was punching involved
I now want to 3D print some of the houses. They were so cute!
After the triple hit of Fast 5, 6, and 7 they've never been able to reach those heights. 8 was inferior to 7 in every way, and whilst 9 was perhaps better, it was almost the most ridiculous and insane.
Fast X dials the absurdity levels back to Fast 6 levels (Fast 7 for the final bit on the dam at the end), and gives us tons of returning character (even two you would not expect), a few new ones, kills a few off, and also gives us the series' best villain.
Momoa as Dante is just out of this world good. In fact, without him I doubt the film would work at all.
Action sequences are mind blowing, and Dom's invincibility aside (he's been a Terminator for a long time now, so this is noting new), the stakes are huge and the fights feel tense.
Fair warning: It ends on a huge cliffhanger. Something happens, we cut to Dom, and then we hit the credits. There is no resolution for this story, that'll have to be in the next one (or the next two, depending on what they do).
There is a mid-credits scene, and it's... so much fun. Totally answered my query about why Dante is just coming after Dom. He's not!
But yeah, blisteringly good thrill-ride from start to finish, some emotional moments, not enough Letty, a half-way decent arc for Roman this time around (I wish they'd give Tej more to do), Brie Larson's character isn't horrible, Alan Richardson is monstrously huge, there's a lot of Charlize Theron in this one - far more than I was expecting - but at the same time not enough Shaw (though I imagine we'll pick up with his story in Fast 11).
Fine installment, a bit darker than the first two. A large part is about Rocket's origin and has some ghastly animal experimentation and Frankenstein-style animal creations. Glad I didn't bring the kids.
Spoiler:
Some new characters die, but all the core Guardians live. The team breaks up but everyone is in a place where their stories can continue. A post credits scene promises the return of Star Lord. I would watch the heck out of Momma Nebula and her planet of super kids, or the New Guardians consisting of Rocket, Groot, Cosmo, that guy with the arrow, Adam Warlock and super girl. Of course I would watch Karen Gillan read the phone book so there's that.
I was a bit irked at how people keep forgetting technology they have, like Star Lords instant space helmet. It would be so easy to explain why he doesn't have it (they took it when they searched him) so please proofread your scripts before approving a final cut.
A fun movie with heart. The animation sometimes reminded me of Into the Spiderverse. I would put it tied with Shrek 2 as the best in the franchise.
That one flew completely under the radar (at least for me), but I heard good things about it.
I kinda would have liked to go to the cinema to watch that new Three Musketeers film. That looked half-decent in the trailer (despite it being all brown. Sheesh.).
Instead I stayed in last night and for the first time in my life I watched a Fast and Furious film. Part 7.(2015)
I have no idea what the story was. Or the stories? Kurt Russel tells Vin Diesel and friends to recover a very pretty hacker lady from the grasp of evil people (one of whom is Tony Jaa! He's good, isn't he), so she can tell him where some sort of super-surveillance software is. And it's really, really funny how nobody ever even raised an eyebrow or asked questions about this central piece of software which basically does the same thing that Batman did in Dark Knight, where every single camera and bit of data is cross-referenced to keep tabs on pretty much anybody or anything in the world. Sure, they don't even pretend it's got anything to do with the real world, because the computer looks like what they use on the submarine in Matrix and the software doesn't come in a USB stick, but some futuristic looking plastic and metal thing (okay, that's a usb stick, but you know what I mean ).
That they do by means of cars and one-liners. I'm not sure if there even is any dialogue in that film, it's all an exchange of one-liners. There's lots of action going on, most of the "what will they do next?" kind rather than the "wow" kind. It's a bit like a jump scare vs. a built-up scare with context and such. The scariest thing in the film was when Vin Diesel stood at the very edge of a very tall building, because that was relateable.
Overall, this whole thing plays out like one of the bad AAA videogames which try to be like bad hollywood films. It's funny how these two genres seem to love each other.
There's several people in there whom I like, like Michelle Rodriguez, who improves every film she's in and Jason Statham. It was also rather nice seeing Kurt Russel again. With Vin Diesel I'm on the fence. I have yet to see a film I like him in (closest was the one in which he's friends with the mafia youngster played by the guy who's interesting and played John F.Kennedy's brother in the miniseries about the Kennedys, but it was still not that good), but I kinda like Vin Diesel as a concept. He's such an odd-looking man. He's not a good actor, he isn't likeable or charismatic, and yet he's still there. He seems to be kinda passionate about certain projects and roles, he seems to be a bit outside of Hollywood, but without getting or wanting any interesting roles, but he's not one of the direct-to-streaming c-action-stars either. "A different kind of cat", one might say, but not an interesting cat.
Funny thing is how careful the film is with its characters. Nobody ever dies. They fall off tall buildings or bridges or elevator shafts, but nobody dies, beause they have to show up in sequels again. So there are no real stakes, no connection to reality or anything else. There is no state, there is no society, there are no bonds outside of their little nerdy group of people who solve problems by means of car. Oh, and of course everybody is very trained and groomed, but nobody has sex. Michelle Rodriguez is around, but she's married to Vin Diesel and more of a secondary dad to the group. It's a weird dynamic.
That was the one during which Paul Walker died and the send-off was rather heart-warming.
Don't Watch.
I was thinking - is there still an equivalent to c-grade direct-to-video action films? What we see with streaming (especially Netflix) is those multi-million direct-to-streaming action films featuring three big names and a painfully by-the-numbers plot. Are those replacing the "crap action films"? Because to the consumer the investment is the same anyway.
I am sure just about everyone here as seen this or read it. I had not. This was brand new to me, but I knew the premise.
It was surprisingly engaging, and I can see why the main actress who's name is escaping me has become a big star. She is pretty good. Once the "Games" get going it is a bit by-the-numbers but the lead up is solid work.
Someone did their homework on the Roman Coliseum and why/how it worked within the context of Roman culture, and then tried to extrapolate it into a different setting. I also approve of the work they did on understanding totalitarianism and how it functioned in the few scenes we got with President Donald Sutherland.
I am actually looking forward to seeing the next one in the trilogy.
“Are there C-grade, direct-to-video action films?”
Yes. Only, it’s more complicated now.
There are a lot of absolute trash movies churned out to make a profit before any audience ever sees them, often starring big names like Bruce Willis. Studios like Asylum also put out cheap imitations of every big name film, and most are just terrible. They also make a lot of attempted so-bad-it’s-good films, trying to catch that Sharknado lightning in a bottle.
However, there are some that must’ve testing grounds for up and coming directors, because some of them are quite good. For example Netflix had a film with Pedro Pascal as a claim jumper with trust issues who teams up with a young woman in order to survive…in space.
There are also some micro budget films that use humor and self-awareness to their advantage, like Manborg, Kung Fury, Space Cop, and presumably Psycho Goreman and Kids vs Aliens.
Sometimes action movies with tiny budgets still make it to the big screen. Upgrade and Sisu can stand up with action films with 10x or 20x their budgets. I’ve heard good things about Gerard Butler’s latest action film, Plane, too. Even EEAAO probably counts, as it is a low budget Sci-fi-martial-arts-comedy.
Since Sturgeon’s Law still applies (95% of any genre is crap), I tend to look for films with at least some good reviews before just watching.
Re watching Candyman 2021.
I think I was unfair to this movie if I mentioned it before in one of these reviews. It's much better than I remembered. This is only the second time I have seen it. I missed part of the story the first go round and I think there are layers to it I am just now picking up on.
BobtheInquisitor wrote: There are a lot of absolute trash movies churned out to make a profit before any audience ever sees them, often starring big names like Bruce Willis.
Only in Bruce's case there was kind of a reason why he was doing those films, and not a happy one.
Easy E wrote: I am actually looking forward to seeing the next one in the trilogy.
The Hunger Games (and there are 4 films, don't forget, and a prequel on the way this year) is a series that I was predisposed to dislike. More YA garbage from a time when that type of film was everywhere. I also set it against the Harry Potter films, a series which I was predisposed to like.
I came out of both with the opposite view: I really don't like the Harry Potter films, and I really liked the Hunger Games films (they go to some dark places in parts 3 and 4!).
I'm honestly fairly convinced The Hunger Games was meant to be a New Adult or just straight Adult novel, but the editors convinced the author to key the first book to YA, which is why subsequent books go incredibly dark places and are very different from the typical YA novel.
Maybe they were meant to be NA. The books came out around the same time publishers were waffling on trying to pitch NA as a genre and finding it easier to just age the books down slightly into YA instead.
Pretty much more of the same and suffers from Sequelitis. Everything in the first 1, BUT BIGGER!
However, any scene set in District 12 is good. Also, the dodgy "Victor's Village" was a nice nod to how the authorities really viewed the games and the winners.
Most of the plot points were telegraphed for me, a veteran movie watcher. That said, I couldn't help but feel engaged with the film and I do not know why. Perhaps it was Donald Sutherland as President Snow, Jennifer Lawrence's performance, the slow-growth and realization of what is happening due to the one act of defiance, or just the neo-Roman Dystopia setting. I do have a soft-spot for Gladiator flicks (Insert obligatory Airplane! reference here).
I am looking forward to watching the Mockingjay duology next.
A murder mystery comedy that is more chuckle-worthy than laugh out loud funny. The cast is brilliant as an ensemble of selfish, possibly-murderous bastards. I’d put it about halfway between Clue and Colombo.
Watch it.
Matilda. The Danny DeVito version
I let my son choose this and the next movie. This is definitely geared towards kids. The movie is very Roald Dahl, in that it is filled will child neglect and abuse while being just off-kilter enough to get away with it. Almost. I have to admit, the confessed-murderer and child-torturer’s comeuppance felt woefully inadequate, with five minutes of goofy hijinks not balancing an hour and twenty minutes of human misery for me.
Do not recommend.
Ernest Goes to Africa
Hoo-boy. This movie…. There are no laughs in this film, but Ernest has two drag scenes (only one of them as the old lady) and two uncomfortably long scenes in brown face, and those aren’t even the worst parts of the movie. Ernest looks so tired and done that if this had been made in the age of Twitter, I would wonder if he wasn’t trying to cancel himself.
A murder mystery comedy that is more chuckle-worthy than laugh out loud funny. The cast is brilliant as an ensemble of selfish, possibly-murderous bastards. I’d put it about halfway between Clue and Colombo.
Watch it.
Ya, It was good. Didn't hear the same sort of praise for the 2nd movie though.
BobtheInquisitor wrote: Ernest looks so tired and done that if this had been made in the age of Twitter, I would wonder if he wasn’t trying to cancel himself.
Jim Varney was diagnosed with lung cancer in 1998 (a year after Ernest Goes to Africa was released) and died at the age of 50 in 2000. I wouldn't be surprised if the cancer wasn't already affecting him at that time.
BobtheInquisitor wrote: Ernest looks so tired and done that if this had been made in the age of Twitter, I would wonder if he wasn’t trying to cancel himself.
Jim Varney was diagnosed with lung cancer in 1998 (a year after Ernest Goes to Africa was released) and died at the age of 50 in 2000. I wouldn't be surprised if the cancer wasn't already affecting him at that time.
For some reason I thought there was more time between this movie and his death. What a disappointing way to finish his career.
BobtheInquisitor wrote: Ernest looks so tired and done that if this had been made in the age of Twitter, I would wonder if he wasn’t trying to cancel himself.
Jim Varney was diagnosed with lung cancer in 1998 (a year after Ernest Goes to Africa was released) and died at the age of 50 in 2000. I wouldn't be surprised if the cancer wasn't already affecting him at that time.
For some reason I thought there was more time between this movie and his death. What a disappointing way to finish his career.
We’ll always have Goes to Jail.
He had several more releases before his death (and a few after). Some of those 'straight to DVD' films don't take much time to film,
So this is pretty rad. Whilst not a cinematic masterpiece, it’s kind of everything a Mario movie should be.
It’s bright, colourful, buckets of fun and just…exactly what it should be. Definitely made for a younger audience, but plenty here to keep the older amused.
A murder mystery comedy that is more chuckle-worthy than laugh out loud funny. The cast is brilliant as an ensemble of selfish, possibly-murderous bastards. I’d put it about halfway between Clue and Colombo.
Watch it.
Ya, It was good. Didn't hear the same sort of praise for the 2nd movie though.
Yes, because it's meandering (which the first film was as well, but it felt so much more interesting and made for grown-ups) and has a very, very lame ending. The second film very much feels like it's been made by either studio execs or algorithms. And it sure looks like it too! The first film has this huge house, which is almost like a character in itself, and it has some mud and cars in it. The second film has Edward Norton's CGI palace and poolside stuff that looks like straight out of instagram (I'll also always remember the scene on the balcony in which the lady contacts the genius detective to hire him. The whole scene looked incredibly fake.) Yes, it was supposed to be more of a cartoon and whatnot, but at a time in which most films are made to look like a cartoon, how is that in any way interesting? The whole thing looked so neat and digital and filtered, it was weird.
Spoiler:
Yes, it's got the one twist, and it got me too. Before that I just thought that the lady was a very bad actress. Turned out she's a good actress playing bad and whatnot. So the twist is cute, but ultimately also is a very convenient way of stretching out a film.
There are some okay characters in there, like Kate Hudson. At least she was relateable. Craig obviously has a lot of fun playing that character, and it's all fine, but he also often seems a bit more like a smug bystander (ie the audience) than a "genius detective", because there isn't really a classic whodunit. And the satisfaction of "insane tech billionnaire gettings whats coming to him", delivered by pretty, rich people in a theatric manner seemed more annoying than relateable.
I think I was just in a bad mood when watching it, but I enjoyed the first film so much more. Oh, and now I remember the first 15 minutes of the film with that little riddle box, which achieves nothing and very much feels like a teaser or trailer for the actual film. Because the characters are introduced right afterwards and much more efficiently.
This might be a thread unto itself, but some of my favourite film Original Music Soundtracks. In no particular order.
Picked by “if I hear such a track, I immediately think of that film and the warm and fuzzies said film gave me”.
1. Flash Gordon. AAAAHH-AHHHH! (Football Fight seriously needs be used for a Star Fighter raid scene in a movie)
2. Star Wars (any/all)
3. Indian Jones
4. Superman (the Christopher Reeves ones)
5. Batman (the Michael Keaton ones)
6. OK not actually an Original Soundtrack but my post my rules I’ll break them if I wanna, and I do wanna, Transformers The Movie.
I haven't even seen the Transformers film, but I know the soundtrack and it rocks.
.) Streets of Fire (Because the film starts and ends on absolute BANGERS and in between we got the weirdly nice Count-Down to Love, and I even like to give One Bad Stud a go every now and then. ) .) Conan the Barbarian (from beginning to end possibly the best soundtrack soundtrack) .) Harold and Kumar go to Whitecastle (classics, reinterpreted or repurposed for niceties) .) Jackie Brown (same as the above, but even better) .) of course bloody Drive! (well. What can I say. Brilliant. And over the years I developed a special fondness for Riz Ortolani's Oh My Love. Such an impressive interpretation, with such weird pronounciation of things, which makes it a bit interesting. Add to that the visuals of the film during those scenes. Can't listen to the song without seeing the driver with that weird mask looking into the restaurant, Ron Pearlman having the time of his life making stupid jokes, the pretty lady looking entirely detached and bored... just brilliant. Love that film. And then there's all the other big hit songs and the atmospheric track. This film is all about adding to the amount of splendour in the world.) .) Rocky IV (classics) .) The Graduate (don't like Simon and Garfunkel much, but that film makes me like them)
...I'm sure there's more. Friday? I like that soundtrack, I like that film.
There's some songs like Air's Playground Love or Bjork's I've seen it all that remind me of films I've never seen, but I know they're heavily connected to them. I also guess that these date me pretty accurately.
Now the music itself is a bit above merely passable, but not necessarily as memorable as the greatest hits of cinema.
But….but. Such a big butt I’ve restrained Sir Mixalot momentarily?
There are elements to the main theme which are added and removed as Murphy loses and regains his humanity.
It’s the addition and removal of the anvil sound. Before Murphy’s Mishap, strings and brass. Largely organic sounds. Robocop on patrol? Anvil is part of the percussion. As Murphy re-emerges, the Anvil is dropped.
So subtle. So incredibly subtle it’s not until Fact Fiend explained it that I even noticed. And I’m pretty sure I saw that film before they were born 🤣🤣
Ghaz wrote: I haven't seen the film that this is from, but it brings back memories of the old cartoon and is one of my favorite film soundtracks...
Spoiler:
Oof. That hit me right in the seven-year-old.
Pacing is a little fast, but I definitely remembered more and more of that as it went on. I didn't think I remembered much of anything beyond the intro of the main theme.
@Mad Doc Grotsnik: That Robocop. I'll pay attention to the soundtrack next time. But I got a lot of admiration for that film in general. It's so compact and efficient. Like a robot police officer.
Pretty decent horror flick. Didn’t rewrite the book or offer much of anything new, but it was a fun ride. Gory, savage and some laughs throughout.
I respected that the movie got right down to business from the jump. Crazy opening, a little exposition to get us familiar with the cast and boom, demonic hijinks ensue.
Meh.
I could overlook it being entirely unnecessary if it brought anything new or exciting to the franchise but it doesn't. It's also weirdly subdued compared to the earlier films, lacking any real oomph in it's rather sparse action scenes.
Just... underwhelmed entirely by it. It was entirely tropes from beginning to end, all played exactly by the book. The actors were playing meat puppets with 2-3 character traits (rather than fleshed out characters), riding in a straight line through boring (and fake looking) landscapes, and a bizarrely unimaginative standard plot with a scattering of creature cameos.
The good stand outs were the background things that they didn't shout out (like the Tears of Selune, the little asteroids around the moon).
The really bad stand outs were the non-human species (like the tabaxi, dragonborn and bird-people) which were bizarrely substandard fursuits with no costume or CGI work done to make them look even passable. No idea what happened there, beyond perhaps the final fight eating all the FX money.
Michelle Rodriguez, her performance at first bugged me then I realized this was her audition to play Drax the destroyer.
The fights were flashy but nothing got me excited because they were too energetic and something about that bothered me. I have no idea why. I did like the plot they came up with to get into the vault using the tools at hand which was fun and I liked that they establish rules for their universe and stuck with them.
It was a fun throw away movie and visually better than the movies that came before it.
I could take it or leave it. But I wouldn't say don't watch it if if it's the only thing to watch or some reason that day.
On a side note this is my youngest nephew's favorite movie, he's 7.
What I don't like is that it's too clean. Which I don't like but it's eventually the modern world not the ancient world so I guess it works.
Sakura Killers - 1987.
Not what I expected at all. At first I thought it was going to recycle a bunch of footage from Ninja Warriors based on the opening but it did not. Not even close. The plot wasn't that far off. The bad guys stealing research and using it for their own ends but the characters were very different more in line with the US specal opps unit from Pray for death.
The best character is easily the Col. Who never leaves his ranch in the States and is seemingly set upon by Ninjas every few days. He easily smokes them every time they show up. for him they're just a nescience, like roaches or something. And I love the concept of some shadow organization of spies that are ever in the background keeping the world or at least the US safe from organized evil doers. Very 80's, kinda fun.
The ninja action was a little weird as our heroes use flash bombs costume changes after becoming trained to fight like ninjas but they use Oni masks which was a silly but fun and unexpected change to a ninja movie.
It's cheesy fun.
So. It is indeed possible to have a Pretty Decent Live Action Transformers Movie.
But other than “hurr durr Bay am the hack”, what actually makes it standout amongst its predecessors?
1. Bit of Stan Bush. Just a snippet, but welcome all the same.
2. The overall visual design, the Transformers aren’t just big blurs of steel coloured robot. Bright, Primary colours let us tell one from the other during fisticuffs.
3. My God! Cameras Totally Can Zoom Out, which means when it is fisticuffs we can actually see quite clearly what’s going on.
4. Angela Bassett. Just like Danny Trejo, you always get points for Angela Bassett.
5. For nerds of a certain vintage? Honest to goodness “wasn’t broken, didn’t need to be fixed” G1 Stylings.
6. The Hoomans are hooman. Not comedy relief. Not somehow the key to it all because reasons. And sorry Mr La Boeuf, a decent actor goes a long way in that.
7. Overall the cast is stripped back and the scale smaller. More time with fewer characters is almost inevitably going to let us give more of a damn about them.
I’m…I’m actually now a bit enthused for Rise of the Beasts.
Doc, have you only just gotten around to Bumblebee? For viewers of our age this is a love letter to our youth. This was the transformers we should have had from the start. I'm not going to claim it's perfect, but when Stan Bush sings "You go the touch!" and it fits so beautifully with the scene, I go to jelly.
I can’t say I’m a fan of that franchise. But, at the same time? The few I’ve seen have been nothing less than in the words of Pinky? Silly willy fun fun fun
It's one of those film series that weirdly got better as it went on (the Mission Impossible series has done this as well, but for vastly different reasons).
Fast 1 is just a Point Break rip-off with cars, but with good energy from its two leads - Vin and Walker. Plus I like Michelle Rodriguez.
Fast 2 has the best title of the whole series but is a convoluted undercover cop/cartel movie that has its moments, but it's more like a generic sequel that had the Fast name slapped on it.
Fast 3 has... nothing to do with any of the others until Dom shows up as a cameo at the end. As a completely standalone film it's... ok, I guess. I thought it was dull. It does pay off in a larger way in Fast 6 and 9.
Fast 4 is where they started to get their act together, bringing the two main characters from the first film back together. It's not a great film, but having rewatched it more recently I can appreciate what they were trying to do. It also allowed them to make the next one.
Fast 5 is the Citizen Kane of the Fast franchise. It is easily the best one, has some incredible action sequences (including the vault dragging scene which is amazing!), a wonderful ensemble cast, and introduces The Rock to the series. It also transitions the show from "street racing" to "international heists and hijinks".
Fast 6, while not as good as Fast 5, is still a worthy follow-up, has more international hijinks, introduces more villains, we get our first returning dead character (won't be the last!), and Dom is slowly turning into an invincible Terminator.
Fast 7 is a monumental film from a production standpoint. Paul Walker died halfway through filming, leaving the director in an extremely difficult position of how (or even if) to finish the film without him. Watching the film, other than some sketchy compositing during the film's emotional farewell, you'd be hard pressed to tell that Walker isn't in half of it, even though his character is in all of it. I think this one is better than 6, and has my fav action sequence of the entire series (the attack on the convoy to rescue Ramsey). Plus Jason Statham rocks!
Fast 8 represented a breaking point, as it's when Vin and The Rock's beef came to a head and the two never appear in scene together (other than clever editing). It's obvious too, which gives the whole film an uncomfortable tension. Plus Dom's storyline has him betraying the team (for good reason) which just gives it a weird vibe. The action in this one is good, but it doesn't hit the heights of Fast 5/6/7.
Hobbs & Shaw is a straight up action movie staring a bunch of charismatic leads (Rock, Statham, Kirby and Elba) in a kinda-sorta related plot that is perhaps too long and too hamstrung by ego (like actor contracts that dictated how much they could be punched without getting a good hit in return). It's fun, but not the greatest film ever.
Fast 9 is an absurd film that basically does everything that people kept daring them to do over the years (they finally go to space). Yes, it's stupidly silly and over the top (moreso than Fast 8), but it is still a lot of fun. The Rock is conspicuous in his absence here. The way the team is split up in this one isn't the best, but Dom's sister has a bigger role and we get another dead character returning under circumstances that stretch credulity. This one is dumb fun, but emphasis on the dumb.
And then Fast 10 brings it all together. The absurdity is down to Fast 6/7 levels rather than 8/9 levels, there's tons of call-backs and payoffs from past films, even homages to other films in the series, lots of returning characters, another from-the-dead reveal which is insane. Plus a post-credits scene that promises to fix the problems of the last few films and hopefully give us a real complete ensemble finale (assuming the next one is the finale).
What about Tokyo Drift? Or is that the second one?
To be fair, I think I’m snobby about it for stupid reasons. Stupid reason being Oiks In “Souped Up” Ford Escorts being a nuisance on the high street with their laughable exhaust amplifiers which fooled precisely no-one I to think a performance car was approaching, blaring our whatever “Ayebeeefaaa banger” was on heavy rotation on Radio One that week, giving me a very low opinion of car enthusiasts.
Automatically Appended Next Post: John Wick 4
Got to admit. Much as I enjoyed John Wick 3, it was feeling a bit too close to shark jumping. And so it was with some trepidation I put on John Wick 4.
Now don’t get me wrong. I’ve absolutely nothing against brainless actioners. Indeed I even have a soft and squishy spot for The Expendables. However, John Wick and John Wick 2 were gloriously stripped back.
3 very, very nearly slipped away from its more grounded nature. 4 has stepped quite confidently away from that precipice.
The Rangers have been on for 30 years+ just doing their thing of appropriating Japanese shows and erasing any traces of Japanese actors or culture.
(Funny how the usual suspects never added the Rangers to their $%@+ list. Maybe because the Japanese owners sold and continue to sell them the rights to do it?
Or maybe erasing Japanese people is fine.)
Point being it's an open question if a reboot really adds anything when the latest version of the show (Power Rangers Mega Ninja Dino Turbo Steel in Space?) is on the air.
This dark and gritty reboot of the Power Rangers is more of an overcast and dusky reboot, moving the Rangers from PG to PG-13 at best. Or maybe G to PG even depending on what you think of the show.
The Pink Ranger turns rebellious and in a shocking act of rebellion cuts her hair! Like 2" off. Shoulder length. If it wasn't for the reaction shots I wouldn't have noticed. The Yellow Ranger might be bisexual but never does anything! The Blue Ranger is on the spectrum but it never impedes his ability to pilot giant mecha or fight Space Witches!
And so on.
Probably the most shocking thing is how they played with the color coding, the Black Ranger is Asian, the Blue Ranger black, the Yellow Ranger Latina! I'm sure someone somewhere thought that was subversive.
It's like they wanted to go Dark and Realistic but just couldn't do it.
I finished off the Hunger Games by watching The Mockingjay. What is really interesting to me about these films is that they are "action" films, but the heroine doesn't really play a role in the world deciding events, except as a witness to them. It is actually kind of interesting that way.
Everyone sees her and knows who she is, and sees her as a symbol. However, she isn't the one leading the armies, winning the battles, Negotiating world peace, etc. Instead, her mission is pretty much a failure that gets a bunch of people killed, and she acknowledges that fact.
In the end, there is a bit of a face-to-face showdown with President Snow, but it is nothing like what you see in a normal action movie. Plus, the ending it relatively downbeat and relatively realistic.
As an aside, every Star Wars movies starts with a pan down to something in space like a planet or a starship. In the Hunger Games, every movie begins with an attack of PTS as the trauma of the events they are part of kicks in and causes some emotional/spiritual attack. I liked that.
For a sci-fi, young adult, action series.... it was kind of light on action, down beat, and "realistic" in how these events might impact a person. Strong acting from Jennifer Lawrence and good support from Julianne Moore, Donald Sutherland, Seymour Hoffman (RIP), and others help to ground these films. Also, great set and art direction too.
These were discontinued 2 decades ago, if you've got a problem with people being anti social in them currently I suggest the nearest classic car club may have gone feral. Or you desperately need to update your references.
That's the third one, although in the timeline it is technically the 6th one, as 4, 5, and 6 take place before it (except the post-credits scene in 6, which takes place during 3... it's very simple! ).
Easy E wrote: I am honestly shocked at how much I enjoyed them.
I had the very same reaction at the end of it all.
HBMC, thanks for that recap. Sounds like I might want to just start at Fast 5.
Sharknado 3: Oh Hell No
I finally figured out what this series reminds me of: that Simpsons episode where Bart and Lisa wrote Itchy and Scratchy. Sharknado feels like the writers take every “awesome” idea a grade school class can throw at them, then run with the silliest. The sub-Corman budget gives it that Threat Level Midnight charm. Then add in some actors who fully commit (Ian Ziering and David Hasslehoff, and Tara Reid half the time) and some who are full ham (most of the cameos*), and you get something an Airplane! coming from the other direction on the dram-comedy spectrum.
The end of part 3 is so ridiculous that it slingshots around awful and rockets back into hilarity.
*There are so many great cameos. Teal’c gets eaten by a shark. Tuvok apparently lives. Malcolm in the Middle’s fate is just brutal. This film also has some pretty unfortunate cameos, such as Anthony Wiener, Michelle Bachman, and Jared from Subway, so there is a dark side.
BobtheInquisitor wrote: HBMC, thanks for that recap. Sounds like I might want to just start at Fast 5.
The issue with that is that so many of the main characters are introduced in the other films - Tej and Roman in Fast 2, and Gisele in Fast 4. Plus there are callbacks in later films, and as I said, Fast X does do a lot to make these films more important.
I wrote about it at length I think. I have nothing to do with Power Rangers, I caught the film on tv, thought I'd give it a go until it gets too annoying, it never really did, ultimately I ended up enjoying it. It's a pretty silly kids' film about the Power Rangers. And for that it's way better than it has any right to be based on the premise I thought. I also like the motivation of the baddie and the fact that the power ranger kids very clearly stated at least twice that their goal was to KILL the baddie made me giggle.
Do not much care about the thing that the show's been doing for 30 years ("erasing Japanese people"), because if anything it shows the contempt in which the companies involved hold American audiences, and that's a fact that can't be pointed out often enough. The subversive thing of course would have been to have the black guy be the black ranger and so on, but I think they just switched it up because otherwise there'd have been Twitter-screaming and who needs that.
Concerning the "Fastiverse" - watched my first F&F film the other week, and I think that'll be enough for me for now.
Do not much care about the thing that the show's been doing for 30 years ("erasing Japanese people"), because if anything it shows the contempt in which the companies involved hold American audiences, and that's a fact that can't be pointed out often enough. The subversive thing of course would have been to have the black guy be the black ranger and so on, but I think they just switched it up because otherwise there'd have been Twitter-screaming and who needs that.
To be clear I don't think the world needs more Twitter screaming or cancelling, effective action to combat racism and foster mutual understanding would be SO MUCH more useful. (I say this after a more than a decade working in international education, I ain't seen no problems solved by screaming on Twitter.)
And even with 1 and 2 halfs of my family being Japanese I don't feel "offended" by a show whose whole rationale is a Japanese show but without those pesky Japanese people. Japan and Japanese Americans seem to be doing fine and if they try to herd my family into camps it won't be because of Sabin and Disney.
But amidst all the other things people are screaming about (did you catch the story that the Hawaiian voice actress from Moanaa is not Polynesian enough to play her in the live action film?) Power Rangers seems positively retro in its racial attitudes and it seems to get a pass.
Besides the PR movie has already cancelled itself through mediocracy.
Do not much care about the thing that the show's been doing for 30 years ("erasing Japanese people"), because if anything it shows the contempt in which the companies involved hold American audiences, and that's a fact that can't be pointed out often enough. The subversive thing of course would have been to have the black guy be the black ranger and so on, but I think they just switched it up because otherwise there'd have been Twitter-screaming and who needs that.
To be clear I don't think the world needs more Twitter screaming or cancelling, effective action to combat racism and foster mutual understanding would be SO MUCH more useful. (I say this after a more than a decade working in international education, I ain't seen no problems solved by screaming on Twitter.)
And even with 1 and 2 halfs of my family being Japanese I don't feel "offended" by a show whose whole rationale is a Japanese show but without those pesky Japanese people. Japan and Japanese Americans seem to be doing fine and if they try to herd my family into camps it won't be because of Sabin and Disney.
But amidst all the other things people are screaming about (did you catch the story that the Hawaiian voice actress from Moanaa is not Polynesian enough to play her in the live action film?) Power Rangers seems positively retro in its racial attitudes and it seems to get a pass.
Besides the PR movie has already cancelled itself through mediocracy.
Power Rangers is pretty much the old 'United Colours of Benetton' approach, instead of today's version that gets a bit too excited about sorting people into distinct categories that they're not allowed to act outside of...
A 2020 Vin Diesel superhero film based on the Valiant comic. It's hard to say if it disappeared due to COVID or from being mediocre but it vanished down the memory hole until the Netflix algorithm coughed it up for me.
The opening is a string of cliches, Vin is a super duper special forces dude whose wife is murdered by a terrorist/serial killer/bad dude and then he's killed. But he is rebuilt by an Evil Corporation given superpowers. He escapes and hunts down the Bad Guy.
But then the twist! The wife, the psycho, all are false memories to motivate him to kill Evil Co's rivals. Mr Evil even points out what a cliche the opening was.
And then it's by the numbers, recover true memories, turn against Evil Co, kill Mr Evil, gets the girl. Comic relief sidekick even points out this such a cliche are they sure it's not another simulation? Fade to black.
The twist was good, even if it led to d!ck joke. If they'd revealed the final scene was in fact another Evil Co sim I'd have been impressed. Otherwise, as forgettable as it was forgotten.
And worth noting... Evil Co? You invented technology that. (checks notes) revives the dead, makes them immortal and unkillable, and gives super powers, and can rewrite memories and your grand plan for that tech is (checks notes) sell super soldiers to the army?
Guys? How is that more useful than say, selling it to people to make them immortal and unkillable? If you think this is a good plan I've got a Bloodshot movie to sell you.
My kid and I were riffing on where the Fast series should go next, after never really watching one.
We decided there are two ways to go:
1. Prequel: Where Dom tells the story of how his ancestors raced with Henry Ford in the first cars against another evil industrialist, and helped invented the assembly line. Featuring cars vs. horses scenes.
2. Cross-Genre lines: MCU films are doing a great job putting superheroes in other genres, like Ant-man being a Heist movie. Therefore, it is time for the FF series to cross into more new genres beyond heists, globe-trotting, and car racing. We decided that the new genre should be a mash-up of musicals, dance movies, and car movies. Therefore, making a car ballet movie with singing.
I know, I know. Someone get my agent on the phone!
Easy E wrote: My kid and I were riffing on where the Fast series should go next, after never really watching one.
We decided there are two ways to go:
1. Prequel: Where Dom tells the story of how his ancestors raced with Henry Ford in the first cars against another evil industrialist, and helped invented the assembly line. Featuring cars vs. horses scenes.
2. Cross-Genre lines: MCU films are doing a great job putting superheroes in other genres, like Ant-man being a Heist movie. Therefore, it is time for the FF series to cross into more new genres beyond heists, globe-trotting, and car racing. We decided that the new genre should be a mash-up of musicals, dance movies, and car movies. Therefore, making a car ballet movie with singing.
I know, I know. Someone get my agent on the phone!
The next instalment can introduce Channing Tatum for Fast Step Up 2 the Furious Streets.
A 2020 Vin Diesel superhero film based on the Valiant comic. It's hard to say if it disappeared due to COVID or from being mediocre but it vanished down the memory hole until the Netflix algorithm coughed it up for me.
The opening is a string of cliches, Vin is a super duper special forces dude whose wife is murdered by a terrorist/serial killer/bad dude and then he's killed. But he is rebuilt by an Evil Corporation given superpowers. He escapes and hunts down the Bad Guy.
But then the twist! The wife, the psycho, all are false memories to motivate him to kill Evil Co's rivals. Mr Evil even points out what a cliche the opening was.
And then it's by the numbers, recover true memories, turn against Evil Co, kill Mr Evil, gets the girl. Comic relief sidekick even points out this such a cliche are they sure it's not another simulation? Fade to black.
The twist was good, even if it led to d!ck joke. If they'd revealed the final scene was in fact another Evil Co sim I'd have been impressed. Otherwise, as forgettable as it was forgotten.
And worth noting... Evil Co? You invented technology that. (checks notes) revives the dead, makes them immortal and unkillable, and gives super powers, and can rewrite memories and your grand plan for that tech is (checks notes) sell super soldiers to the army?
Guys? How is that more useful than say, selling it to people to make them immortal and unkillable? If you think this is a good plan I've got a Bloodshot movie to sell you.
If they want to expand the fast franchise even more, how about getting that one guy from the first film that they have never mentioned since, and have him in a street racing film?
Or a prison break when we find out he was the one guy they caught and he's been in jail this whole time.
Tamereth wrote: If they want to expand the fast franchise even more, how about getting that one guy from the first film that they have never mentioned since, and have him in a street racing film? Or a prison break when we find out he was the one guy they caught and he's been in jail this whole time.
You joke, but the 5th film see's a character not seen since the 1st film show up, and in the 6th film they have to infiltrate a jail where a character from the 4th film is to get information.
This is what I mean about Fast 9 being them just doing everything people have said about since the start, up to and including them going to space. Also means that they don't have that nonsense hanging over them for the remainder of the series. No more articles about "When will the Fast series finally go into space?" because they've done it.
But, and I mean this sincerely, has anyone jumped a shark yet? Because I get the feeling if any movie series can get away with such a scene, it’s this one.
A 2020 Vin Diesel superhero film based on the Valiant comic. It's hard to say if it disappeared due to COVID or from being mediocre but it vanished down the memory hole until the Netflix algorithm coughed it up for me.
The opening is a string of cliches, Vin is a super duper special forces dude whose wife is murdered by a terrorist/serial killer/bad dude and then he's killed. But he is rebuilt by an Evil Corporation given superpowers. He escapes and hunts down the Bad Guy.
But then the twist! The wife, the psycho, all are false memories to motivate him to kill Evil Co's rivals. Mr Evil even points out what a cliche the opening was.
And then it's by the numbers, recover true memories, turn against Evil Co, kill Mr Evil, gets the girl. Comic relief sidekick even points out this such a cliche are they sure it's not another simulation? Fade to black.
The twist was good, even if it led to d!ck joke. If they'd revealed the final scene was in fact another Evil Co sim I'd have been impressed. Otherwise, as forgettable as it was forgotten.
And worth noting... Evil Co? You invented technology that. (checks notes) revives the dead, makes them immortal and unkillable, and gives super powers, and can rewrite memories and your grand plan for that tech is (checks notes) sell super soldiers to the army?
Guys? How is that more useful than say, selling it to people to make them immortal and unkillable? If you think this is a good plan I've got a Bloodshot movie to sell you.
I watched that today too.
I wish I hadn’t.
Ah, Bloodshot. Just yesterday I barely refrained from posting to call it the movie you wish you hadn't seen. But I keep getting tempted and my will is only so strong.
I was done with the movie when the professional soldier discovered that he can just beat people to death with his bare hands instead of saving time and effort by using firearms like normal people.
Mad Doc Grotsnik wrote: But, and I mean this sincerely, has anyone jumped a shark yet? Because I get the feeling if any movie series can get away with such a scene, it’s this one.
It seems to me that shark movies have become more more popular in recent years. If ever there was a time...
Bonus points for Jason Statham playing both Shaw from Rapidos y Furiosos and Jonas from The Meg in the same movie.
Mad Doc Grotsnik wrote: But, and I mean this sincerely, has anyone jumped a shark yet? Because I get the feeling if any movie series can get away with such a scene, it’s this one.
Literally, no. Figuratively, you could argue several times over (including the dam stunt at the end of Fast X). But the Fast series has, over time, made itself immune to such things.
If there was a literal definition of "unstoppable force", the Fast series would be it.
I stumbled upon S13 of Mystery Science Theatre 3000 on some random channel where they just stream MST3K back-to-back-to-back.
In Season 13, the new host is Holly and she is joined by the Bots. However, they are all voiced by different folks I think. Kinga and her sidekick (Patton Oswald) are still there doing their thing.
The movie was the Charles Band pre-MCU NOT-Dr. Strange movie Doctor Mordid which stars Jeffrey Combs. I had seen the movie before without the bots, so settled in to get their take. As usual, the "skits" are not great, but some of the one-liners are true crowd pleasers, the longer you watch the funnier it gets.
I won't go out of my way to find more of S13, but if I run into it I also won't turn it off! After watching S12 - The Gauntlet with my family; my wife has put her foot down and will not watch more with me. It is not her thing.
I do get it’s appeal, but it’s creators should be aware I’m entirely capable of ripping the piss out of crap films all on my own
Doesn’t mean the show is worthless of course. Just it feels superfluous to my own peculiar needs. And I’ll happily concede they may spot stupid, laughable stuff I missed!
Just... underwhelmed entirely by it. It was entirely tropes from beginning to end, all played exactly by the book. The actors were playing meat puppets with 2-3 character traits (rather than fleshed out characters), riding in a straight line through boring (and fake looking) landscapes, and a bizarrely unimaginative standard plot with a scattering of creature cameos.
Everyone I know that has seen it, like it or not, agrees fat dragon was the best bit.
Guardians 3 .
I don't know if I enjoyed it or not, it hit similar notes as the previous two but I didn't enjoy the fight scenes much at all. The one in the big ship near the end just felt really mechanical and very much like a bad cut scene from a game. Not overly impressed I guess.
Been house sitting for Sis so no PC so binged D+ like a madman
Terminator Dark Fate
Some how worse than Genisys, 1/10
Nightmare Alley
Interesting slice of Noir from Del Toro, excellent cast with a very dark unsettling tale of woo=woo peddling and humans general awfulness 8/10
Shape of Water
You want Deep One hybrids, this is how you get them, not really my cuppa of team but well made and quality turns from all the cast 7/10
Lightyear
Stunningly average, felt like a big budget version of the spin off cartoon 5/10
Deadpool 2
Because of course removing the one redeeming feature of the first one early on meant it wasn't going to be a good time for me as the forced kookiness is really grating 4/10
Plane - Dakka/10 Gerard Bulter plays a man with an aggressively stupid fake movie/TV show name (Brodie Torrance) who is a pilot of a low-rated airline on a small flight, going to visit his daughter who is in Hawaii. On the way there the plane is struck by lightning and they lose power, forcing them to do an emergency landing on an island in the Philippines (or Indonesia... I wasn't 100% on that). But it's an island held by separatist forces to take, random and execute foreigners, so he has to team up Mike Colter, a convict (and ex-French Foreign Legionnaire) who was on his plane being extradited for a murder he committed 15 years ago.
There's nothing too complex about this film. It's pretty simple from start to finish, with decent action ("Brodie" is not a super-hero super agent - he can handle himself, but he's not some secret navy seal or anything stupid like that), and a satisfying ending. The plane scenes are pretty tense.
Air - Shoes/10 The second film in our One Word Title Double Feature is the Amazon movie Air, about Nike signing Michael Jordan and inventing a shoe for him. It's a very funny film, exceptionally well acted, and really quite good from start to finish. I'd recommend everyone see it. Also interesting is that they never really show young Jordan, he's either just out of frame, in near darkness, has his back to the camera, has maybe one line of dialogue (over the phone), and he really isn't a character in this because he is this larger than life figure. It was an interesting choice. Cast is great.
Stunningly average, felt like a big budget version of the spin off cartoon 5/10
The strangest part about Lightyear is that it begins with a title card saying that Andy, from Toy Story, saw a Buzz Lightyear film when he was a kid and that this film was that movie. I don't think most kids of Andy's age circa Toy Story 1 would have much fun with a movie as dour and serious as Lightyear. Seems that neither did anyone else, given how badly the movie did.
This was a pretty cool Sci Fi action flick back in the day. The monster effects aren’t great, but for me it didn’t matter due to the story telling and acting. I’d sum up with “it still holds up, check it out” if it weren’t for the Vin Diesel of it all.
In retrospect, this comes across as a Vin Diesel vanity film (complete with black tank top), wherein he is the edgy badass the whole film circles around, to the point that when he isn’t on screen everyone is asking, “where’s Vin Diesel?” I don’t know if he had his famous ego back in the day, or if this was its origin story. Either way, this adds a layer of fascination to the movie that makes it a must watch.
Sharnado: The 4th Awakens
Whichever kid is smashing together toys in the writers’ room has just discovered Star Wars and superhero movies. The writing is still at the Itchy-and-Scratchy level of ridiculously stupid violence, but this has a lot more reference humor than the previous movie, rather than pure absurdity. There aren’t as many great deadpan line readings, either. I’d rate is as still hilarious, but not up to the redonkulous finale of the previous film.
Clue
This is a classic. I can’t be objective about this film. I love it soooo much, it…laughs. Laughs on the side of my face. Heaving,,, breathless heaving..
Automatically Appended Next Post: While I don’t think we’d agree on the politics or casting of Lightyear, I think we’re on the same page that child Andy would never have sat through that film, and certainly wouldn’t have wanted the toy.
This is a classic. I can’t be objective about this film. I love it soooo much, it…laughs. Laughs on the side of my face. Heaving,,, breathless heaving..
Automatically Appended Next Post: While I don’t think we’d agree on the politics or casting of Lightyear, I think we’re on the same page that child Andy would never have sat through that film, and certainly wouldn’t have wanted the toy.
If you like Clue, you'll probably like the lesser-known Murder by Death, a black comedy that relies on the conceit of getting a bunch of stand-ins for well-known detectives from literature and movies together at an isolated country house, on invitation by a maniac who wants them to determine who is the best among them - or die in the process. I find it humorous enough, although it needs to be said that it's weirdly racist in places, mostly due to some of the parodied detectives being laden with racist clichees in the original material, but still, some of the jokes did not age that well. I watched it in the german translation first, which adds another layer of abstraction and comedy, as some of the punchlines etc. were translated rather freely (read weird monkey-cheese non-sequiturs) as it was customary at the time.
I want to see Murder By Death, but when we finally sat down to watch it, the trailer started playing, including some of the racist humor, and my wife overruled the film. We don’t want our son to accidentally get in trouble for repeating a “funny joke” at school. And Ernest Goes to Africa was really painfully awkward to watch and then discuss afterwards.
Hopefully we’ll get to see it in a couple years, when judgement has matured a bit more.
I’m also on the lookout for Haunted Honeymoon, which I remember feeling somewhat similar in tone, but can’t find it anywhere.
H.B.M.C. wrote: So the next film you'll be watching is, I presume, Blazing Saddles?
I think we’ve already seen it. Either way, we find there’s an important distinction between movies that find racism funny and movies that make fun of racism. Blazing Saddles is in the latter category, whereas EGTA was in the first category. Big difference.
BobtheInquisitor wrote: I want to see Murder By Death, but when we finally sat down to watch it, the trailer started playing, including some of the racist humor, and my wife overruled the film. We don’t want our son to accidentally get in trouble for repeating a “funny joke” at school. And Ernest Goes to Africa was really painfully awkward to watch and then discuss afterwards.
Hopefully we’ll get to see it in a couple years, when judgement has matured a bit more.
I’m also on the lookout for Haunted Honeymoon, which I remember feeling somewhat similar in tone, but can’t find it anywhere.
Understandable, and probably the right call. The movie relies pretty heavily on the audience being familiar with the whole Whodunnit genre, and some of the specific detectives, for its humour, so somebody who is not at least passingly familiar with e.g. Miss Marple, Hercule Poirot or various hard-boiled detectives will probably don't find it that funny anyway, so it's definitely more geared toward older audiences.
BobtheInquisitor wrote: None of us are familiar with those characters or the genre in any depth.
Then i recommend you skip that movie, it will either bore you to death or about 75% of the jokes will go over your head. Combined with the other problems, there's not really any reason for you to watch it, you can probably enjoy your time much better with other fare.
I still want to see it. Sometimes movies that aren’t “for” me open my eyes to new opportunities. But maybe I’ll wait until the others are asleep and watch it on my own.
This was a pretty cool Sci Fi action flick back in the day. The monster effects aren’t great, but for me it didn’t matter due to the story telling and acting. I’d sum up with “it still holds up, check it out” if it weren’t for the Vin Diesel of it all.
In retrospect, this comes across as a Vin Diesel vanity film (complete with black tank top), wherein he is the edgy badass the whole film circles around, to the point that when he isn’t on screen everyone is asking, “where’s Vin Diesel?” I don’t know if he had his famous ego back in the day, or if this was its origin story. Either way, this adds a layer of fascination to the movie that makes it a must watch.
Its a great B movie up until the point there is too much diesel, culminating in him trying to do his Khhhaaannn moment.
Not without its charms. They’re just…..really dubious charms.
The acting is awful, the plots cheesy. The effects, such as they are, laughable.
The soundtrack is probably the best thing about it, and even then only because it’s cheesy post-disco cheapness.
Yet….it still appeals. Against all sense you still get a largely enjoyable bit of nonsense.
Automatically Appended Next Post: Expendables 2
I did watch the first, but commenting on this one as I feel it’s when the series was at its dubious best.
All-Star-Of-Yesteryear-Cast. Everyone seems to be having a good time and delivering perfectly acceptable performances.
The action is a pleasing mix of Action Silly Tropes, and fairly decent restraint - finite ammo, short controlled bursts, but also some gratutious “I think he’s dead already” daftness.
Jean Claude Van Damme shows a taste for the scenery as the villain named…erm…Vilain. Chuck Norris cameos in a fairly cringe inducing scene. Terry Crews is of course Bonus Points.
As a movie equivalent of a Rock Super Group Album, this absolutely delivers. It doesn’t try to be something it was never going to be. Instead focusing on “what made our heyday movies fun”. Whilst also poking fun at its own genre.
MST3k - Love it. Haven't seen a single episode of the new seasons, but since they seem to be on the youtube channels which show mst3k all day....maybe worth looking into that.
Murder by Death is great fun. Funny thing - Pretty sure Clue is WAY less known than Murder by Death 'round here.
Expendables 2 - Uhm. I was okay with it. Back then I loved the first film, the second left me colder, and I assume I wouldn't like the 1st one any more as much either. Norris was weird in that film, but the one thing I won't forgive is that of all the Chuck Norris jokes he could have told he steals one from William Riker!?
I felt the first Expandables film was a largely joyless exercise, and the third suffers from them not being a group for most of the film (and trying to introduce "younger" people), even if Antonio Banderas is fantastic in it.
The second film though? That's where all the elements were right. Fantastic action, fun villain, good characters, and they're having fun doing it.
Yeah. Just on the third one now. Whilst not crap, it just doesn’t gel as well as the other two.
It is nice to have Wesley Snipes back on screen, and Mel Gibson is….ok as the main villain. But it’s just sort of lacking the same oomph, particularly compared to the second movie.
But hey. All three are part of Stallone’s Late Career Hurrahs (the others being Escape Plan, Rambo late sequels and Rocky Balboa) which whilst hardly revolutionary, at least don’t pretend he’s not ageing nor invincible. Indeed particularly the Rambo ones really strip it back from the silliness of Rambo 3.
The main problem? We’re given scant time to get to know the newbies. And so we….just don’t get to connect with them. As such, all their own scenes are largely forgettable.
But…highlights! There are highlights!
Indiana Solo piloting his chopper with the style and aplomb we’d expect. Arnie having a low-effort-required blast. Antonio Banderas being awkward but charming! Wesley Snipes being excellent.We even have a vague explanation for why the final battle site is well set up for all sorts of Got To Admit Pretty Cool Stunts - it’s the training area Mel Gibson uses.
Now that’s not a great nor even really persuasive reason, but I appreciate the effort.
Whilst the weakest of currently three films in a never truly brilliant franchise, it still hits the right beats for fans of 80’s and 90’s action film nonsense. Not as loudly or accurately as its preceding entries, but they are there.
Best of all? No Steven Seagal. I could go into details of why that pleases me and what a ridiculous joke that man is, but I’ll let Space Ice, a YouTuber who I recently discovered take that strain. Because frankly, they’re much funnier than I am (I know, not a tall order but shush) and just…..nail it.
Date Night A Steven Carell and Tina Fey vehicle that is close, but never quite makes it to being worth a damn. It has some things to say, and the three stand-outs parts are:
1. Tina Fey explaining her sexy fantasy.
Spoiler:
Basically to spend all day alone in a hotel room and have lunch with no interruptions.
2. Marky Mark's character never wears a shirt. I've known fella's like that.
3. Robot dance pole-dance. Yeah, you read that right. It could have been better, but was an inspired idea.
Not Okay A woman pretends she was at the scene of a French terror attack. She leans into the lie, and is eventually outed. This is supposed to be a comedy, but it is not funny. None of the characters are likable.
I'm Totally Fine A consideration about grief and loss with some comedy moments, and low-budget, indie vibes all over it.
A entrepreneur's friend and partner dies just on the cusp of them signing a big deal. At a get-away, the friend returns, but it is an alien with the friends memories coming to test the abilities of humans. It is left ambiguous if this is a delusion or an actual alien.
I’d rank Date Night around Dinner For Schmucks in terms of entertainment value, being an enjoyable experience that left no real long term impression on me.
i've seen Date Night due to some weird reasons and under weird circumstances, I vaguely remember. Maybe in a hotel room. Anyway, it seemed fine. Wahlberg's character was funny.
Last night, instead of going to bed, I watched American Hustle for some reason. It's still a fun showcase of actors acting out funny characters with ups and downs. Bale is a league to his own, Amy Adams is really, really good, Bradley Cooper almost seems like the odd one out. Maybe BIG ACTING isn't his thing and instead he's about the little things? I never got the stuff around Jennifer Lawrence, but she gets to play a funny character, gets some good lines, but also an unnecessary sequence later on. Jeremy Renner is himself. Both his and Jennifer Lawrence's characters (her less so, but he definately) feel like they should be played by older actors. Anyway, it's still good fun. Afterwards I was surprised to read that that American Hustle got 10(!) oscar nominations. Didn't win a single one, but the number of nominations surprised me.
American Hustle is an odd film because it has this great big twist at the end that's meant to throw everything you've seen into question as a big "Ah-hah!" moment. Except... if you've ever watched Hustle (a truly excellent show), then that twist was old hat, and quite plain by that show's standards.
H.B.M.C. wrote: American Hustle is an odd film because it has this great big twist at the end that's meant to throw everything you've seen into question as a big "Ah-hah!" moment. Except... if you've ever watched Hustle (a truly excellent show), then that twist was old hat, and quite plain by that show's standards.
Yeah, the "twist" is rather uninteresting.
Spoiler:
And basically just what Adams' character told Bale's character what she would do in the beginning if I got that right?
It really just is enjoyable as a showcase of these actors wearing period clothes and hair and do their thing very well.
It’s not good, but as a time capsule to the 80’s it’s kind of fun. Richard Pryor brings a lot of charm to the film, as does Reeves (especially as drunk Superman). Unfortunately it drags most of the way through to a climax without much action or spectacle.
I’m curious if they moved much of the movie to smallville with Lana Lang for budgetary reasons or to minimize Margot Kidder’s role. Also, the film disproves Man of Steel, Woman of Kleenex.
Horror movie, about the vengeance of two black American farmers framed for murder on the centenary of their execution and seizure of their land.
This is a pretty decent horror flick - though the horror side is somewhat subdued. There are kills, and they are gory but it seems….dreamlike. I’m not sure if that’s a limitation of film making talent, or a deliberate stylistic choice. But our killers are pretty dispassionate, with a calm precision to their killing. It’s not quite working for me, but perhaps it’ll tickle another’s pickle.
Why did they ha to wait a hundred years rather than get vengeance on those who ringed them? Is this supposed to be a reparations allegory or some other bad idea?
An old man and his son live in the hills, earning a living through farming and spending their time bickering about the youth's approaching manhood. The arrival of a near to death stranger with a satchel full of money, closely followed by a shifty trio wearing sheriff's badges, foreshadows a bloody showdown.
It's not an overly complex movie or challenging for the actors, but the atmosphere and build up make it a worthwhile waste of an evening.
The Old Way
It's Nic Cage playing a psychopath in a western! What more do you want?
A man with no emotions settles down to raise a family. When his past catches up with bloody consequences, he sets out with his remaining kin to exact vengeance.
It's strange to say that watching emotionless scenes between Nic and his young co-star were at times very moving. I very much enjoyed this.
BobtheInquisitor wrote: Why did they ha to wait a hundred years rather than get vengeance on those who ringed them? Is this supposed to be a reparations allegory or some other bad idea?
The land seized from them is up for sale, gathering the descendant of their aggressors back to the small town.
I had a pair of Dr appointments today with a considerable gap between.
Not enough time to go home/retun & nothing better to do in the area to kill time other than read a book.
So I went & saw the current Fast & Furious movie.
(It was the only thing playing that fit the time gap.)
That was a mistake. I should have just found someplace comfortable & read my book.
I wasnt expecting anything good (especially after the last one.).
But this one was actually WORSE! Just sequences of pointless crap, sprinkled with cameos, & topped off with stupid. All setting up a Fast X part II.
BobtheInquisitor wrote: The reviews I’ve seen said it was good but not great, and that the early hype of “best superhero movie ever” did it no favors.
To be fair it was never possible for it to be the "best superhero movie ever".
How can you tell? They had to put Keaton's Batman in it to get anyone to give a about it.
Having greatly enjoyed the Rocky series, including the latter day sequel Rocky Balboa, now giving Creed a spin.
What strikes me about these films is just how good they are. Given Stallone’s career when I was first of age was Dumb Action Films, to find the Rocky series is less about the fight, and more about the fighter and what shapes them, I was genuinely impressed.
I was honestly surprised it won best picture. It looks gorgeous, in a Tim Burton-esque way. The story is pretty "by-the-numbers" to me, even if it is dripping with Cold War subtexts and themes. However, the all sign language lead dialogue and the performance of the lead villain is pretty mesmerizing.
The Equalizer 2 Denzel rules. He owns this role. Plus, I would watch anything directed by Antoine Fuqua
That said, even though the Equalizer handles the main antagonists, that gets him no closer to the BBEGs that kicked off the whole sequence of events.
Honestly, if you like John Wick you should like these too. A bit less stylized though.
We watched the Sphere - 1998 last night.
Much better than I had expected. I can't recall having seen it before.
Based on a report paid for by the US government a team is assembled to solve a first contact mystery deep under the ocean.
From there it is a little like event horizon, just a little bit but not too much.
warhead01 wrote: We watched the Sphere - 1998 last night.
Much better than I had expected. I can't recall having seen it before.
Based on a report paid for by the US government a team is assembled to solve a first contact mystery deep under the ocean.
From there it is a little like event horizon, just a little bit but not too much.
Like most of the Michael Crichton stuff that does not involve Dinosaurs, come for the interesting concept that stimulates your brain, stay for the most asinine denouement imaginable
I enjoyed some of the dialog quite a bit especially that the paper was crap and admitting it to the government constituted fraud. I enjoyed the cast over all.
warhead01 wrote: We watched the Sphere - 1998 last night.
Much better than I had expected. I can't recall having seen it before.
Based on a report paid for by the US government a team is assembled to solve a first contact mystery deep under the ocean.
From there it is a little like event horizon, just a little bit but not too much.
Like most of the Michael Crichton stuff that does not involve Dinosaurs, come for the interesting concept that stimulates your brain, stay for the most asinine denouement imaginable
Indeed. This might have been the book that made me stop reading Crichton.
However, even Jurassic Park (the book) had a Crichton-style ending.
warhead01 wrote: We watched the Sphere - 1998 last night.
Much better than I had expected. I can't recall having seen it before.
Based on a report paid for by the US government a team is assembled to solve a first contact mystery deep under the ocean.
From there it is a little like event horizon, just a little bit but not too much.
Like most of the Michael Crichton stuff that does not involve Dinosaurs, come for the interesting concept that stimulates your brain, stay for the most asinine denouement imaginable
Indeed. This might have been the book that made me stop reading Crichton.
However, even Jurassic Park (the book) had a Crichton-style ending.
For me it was Timeline That one got a very bad movie too, iirc.
It’s the third one popping up on Amazon Prime which got me watching.
Currently on Creed II. And I’m loving Creed and Rocky’s relationship. It’s warm, and genuine.
And let’s face it, it’s the relationships between the characters which make the Rocky films work - especially compared to OTT impersonators, such as the various Van Damme movies. Don’t get me wrong I enjoy those, but they just don’t hold a candle to Rocky.
I also like how they’re not overly glamorous movies. Yes we see our titular characters rise in wealth and fame, but it’s never that easy for them.
Everything about the films is just…good. Ok maybe not Rocky V.
Preparing to see the new Flash movie, we’re catching our son up in some films:
Batman (89)
It’s good. We all know it’s good. It’s a classic.
I hadn’t taken the time before to appreciate how well-realized Gotham city is in this film.
Man of Steel
I generally enjoy this more as an alien invasion film than a Superman film. It’s got a lot of good stuff in it yet feels dour and joyless.
My son said the final battle was “like a thousand 9/11’s” and asked if we could watch a fun Superman movie afterwards. We only had one of those left, so as a palate cleanser:
Superman IV: The Quest for Peace
It’s bad. We all know it’s bad. But it’s so fun.
It takes so long to get to the action, but never drags due to the cheesy TV-writing (business banter! Hammy villains! Clark and Superman on a double date!). And Nuclear Man. I love Nuclear Man. You gotta love that swimsuit-tabard, that coif and glam nails, his constant scream-mugging and his silly powers. And his theme music is unapologetically badass.
Burton definitely redefined Gotham, giving it a certain timeless quality. Kind of modern, but the Art Deco/Art Noveau stylings, 40’s/50’s fashions but entirely modern technology. That of course carried over to the Animated Series, which may well be the best thing on celluloid ever.
A decent Tom Cruise vs Aliens film (this is number... 3 for him? War of the Worlds and Oblivion, have I missed any?) but let down by the meaningless title. The Manga's title - All you need is Kill - or the tagline in the poster - Live Die Repeat - would have served much better.
The short version, Tom Cruise and his exo-skeleton are fighting aliens and Tom dies within 10 minutes of the start of the battle. But in the process he's splashed with ALPHA ALIEN BLOOD which puts him in a time loop where with each death he resets to the start of the day. The middle of the movie is entertaining as he relives and learns combat skills and tries to figure out the mystery. In the end he learns how to beat the aliens just as he loses the power and now must use his last life to win.
The ending is a total let down, feeling like a happy ending tacked on for no reason. If they'd resisted temptation and followed their own damn rules it would have been a lot stronger. As is... I dunno, 3 stars? maybe 2? Not bad but other than the Exo Suits and D Day style battle is there anything to remember here?
It was movie night in the Flinty household and daughter of 8 warms up her kids Netflix profile for some weekend frivolity. This wee gem is front and centre. Looks cute so we put it on.
Cute pets, so far so good. Reality glitch making all humans disappear. A bit deep maybe but the pets are cute and wisecracky, so no harm no foul. Multi dimensional shenanigans, whatever.
Then the cute soft toy looking characters make an appearance and it all starts to escalate dramatically. The squirrel states it wants to wear the main characters skin, happy tree friends style. Well hopefully daughter missed that in all the cuteness. Oh another dimensional shift. For the love of… so now they are zombies wanting to eat the characters brains… “daddy can we stop this. It’s kind of freaking me out”
What were they thinking!?
Oh yeah, it’s also an Interactive thing. And one of the choices is to save the cute cat main character, or save the universe. And so universe is saved and we get a lovely rendition of “it’s ok, I have had a good life and I love you, drop me and save everyone else”.
Automatically Appended Next Post: And the meatball character that literally gets splattered across the landscape moments after being introduced.
Hopefully the post horror my little pony will be able to keep the nightmares at bay tonight.
Gave it a whirl was it reminded me of the truly wonderful Grim Fandango, a game I'm a tad proud of beating in the more or less pre-Internet days, the film is visually awesome with a few kick in the feels on par with Up, utterly worth a watch
Dark Water
I'm fairly sure I saw the original at some point and this one just seemed ahem watered down, I suspect if it wasn't for cuddlesome Jen and the much missed Pete Postelwait I would have given up, it's okay but feels like an overlong Outer Limits
I'll also 2nd Edge of Tomorrow, kind of fun and seeing wee Tommy C splattered over and over is fun, also has a local connection as the beach assault was meant to be filmed at my nearest beach but the studio changed its mind but the studio set is extended with CGI hijinks of said beach (and most of them down here was used a actual D-Day training locations)
Why did I do this to myself? What an utterly wretched movie. Utterly devoid of charm, two extremely racists characters. Even Megan Fox wobbling in slow motion is scant reward for this awful mess of a movie.
I don’t think anyone is expecting Shakespeare here. I mean, it’s a Transformers movie. But it’s not even much fun. They even made Devastator lame.
Worse, having watched the first movie yesterday, I now feel obliged to watch the third one.
It’s not good. I melted the eyes in my face holes.
Watching The Sand instead. Horror film about a carnivorous beach….
So…yeah. This alright, I guess. If like me you’ve seen Creepshow 2, and are familiar with the segment of that entitled The Raft? You’ve pretty much seen this movie. Except unlike The Sand, The Raft rattled through its premise and story in maybe 30 minutes.
I don’t dislike this movie as such, and I dare say had I’d not seen its obvious influence movie, it would be an enjoyable enough bit of hokum. It does suffer from obvious and not very good CGI, but given its low budget thats kind of understandable. The use of it is oddly uneven though. Pretty impressive in one kill, super ropey on others.
Might be one for a shonky horror movie night with friends and a few beers. Definitely one I think I’d have felt cheated if it wasn’t a free view, but something I’d specifically paid for.
I wasn't sure which thread this would fit in best.
Ok, Evil Dead the Musical.
You can find it on Youtube I think.
We watched Evil Dead the musical last night. They bashed evil dead 1 and 2 together with an army of Darknes ending. So in a way it seemed like it would be a reasonable back story for the show.
There's a song about Jake, the red neck who carries the luggage up to the cabin for 100 dollars in the movie, the man is a saint.
Running song - is look who's evil now. It's a train wreck.
2020 horror movie, starring Maisie Williams and Sylvester “Greatest Incarnation Of The Doctor Ever” McCoy. Based on the comic book “Une nuit de pleine lune” which I can’t say I’m familiar with.
After my usual descent into utter, utter crap? This is good. Like, objectively good. Williams and McCoy are impressive in this. McCoy in particular is channeling a bit of his Doctor, without being a pastiche of that character.
Whilst billed as a horror, it’s on the psychological side of things. Heavy on creepy vibes, and you’re never quite sure where the characters stand.
I’m not gonna say much more, as I’m going to file this under “really enjoyable films you can only recommend but not explain why”. The same category Cube and let’s be honest, any decent psychological horror belongs in.
Give it a watch.
Automatically Appended Next Post: Do you know me?
It’s another thriller! This time, the plot is kicked off by a 20 something discovering a lookalike of her as a kid on a Milk Carton.
Her friend calls the number for a laugh….and it all spirals from there.
This is….pretty enjoyable to be honest. The performances are good, and the plot isn’t too hokey, at least for my tastes. And hey, the premise is nothing if not interesting. Certainly I’m not aware of such a tale being a thriller.
Downside? I feel this could’ve been part of a Police Procedural TV show. Whilst it’s not dragging, and comes in at just under 90 minutes, I think a shorter format maybe have been to it’s benefit. I guess the crucial thing is I am not bored.
Automatically Appended Next Post: Soldier
1998 Kurt Russell flick, direct by Paul W S Anderson.
Not a terribly well regard movie, certainly for its budget it feels a bit cheap. But. It is fun. And given its peculiar vintage, perhaps one of, if not the last sci-fi actioners made with practical effects instead of CGI.
Wiki suggests it’s a “sidequel” to Blade Runner, as they share a writer, and there are Easter Eggs. For my sins I’m just not familiar enough with Blade Runner to confirm or deny in my own opinion.
If anything, I’d say it feels very Rogue Trooper. Oh, and the vehicles in it really remind of the Votann’s wheels. Well. The Votann wheels really remind of these vehicles.
But hey. It is enough fun in itself, and one I do like to watch every now and again.
An unnecessary sequel that turns the bad guy from the first movie into the almost hero offering him a Darth Vader style redemption at the end.
I don't know if there was any deeper meaning to this flick, not much past be nice to your dogs.
Didn't care for the ending but it's not a poorly constructed movie.
I think the first one was better or at least interesting as a concept.
Renfield- Are you a fan of the unique acting stylings of Nic Cage? Do you like old school splatterhouse fights, with buckets of blood and limbs flying everywhere?
Then this is the bizarre action comedy for you. The cast does a wonderful job. Shohreh Aghdashloo is far more frightening than Dracula, and Ben Schwartz is perfect as her bumbling son.But the real appeal for me was the ridiculously over the top violence. When you see a man's arms torn off, used to beat him and then thrown across the room to impale another dude- it's just delightfully weird. It is just a fun, blood soaked popcorn flick- kind of reminds me of the same tone as Idle Hands.
I bloody love Robocop, me. But this is one of the TV movies pretty much nobody even knew, let alone cared, that got made.
Didn’t realise it was part three of an ongoing series, so arresting it here to go find the others. For the brain is evil and it must be punished.
But…surely…surely they can’t be worse than Robocop 3?
Right?
Automatically Appended Next Post: Oh god there’s not three of them. There’s four.
Oh no.
It's always a good sign when the cast is basically
Cast
Page Fletcher as Officer Alex Murphy / RoboCop
Maurice Dean Wint as Commander John T. Cable / RoboCable
Maria Del Mar as OCP Executive Sara Cable
Anthony Lemke as OCP Executive James Murphy
Leslie Hope as Ann R. Key
Geraint Wyn Davies as David Kaydick
Kevin Jubinville as OCP Executive Damian Lowe
Anthony J. Mifsud as Chuck Conflagration
Eugene Clark as Carver RH
Marni Thompson as Abby Normal
Françoise Yip as Lexx Icon
Do you want to know what is an even better sign?
Prior to being cast, Fletcher had not seen the RoboCop feature films, and no effort was made to mimic Peter Weller's original movements. Fletcher instead worked out a RoboCop movement system for himself that he felt was appropriate for where the character was, physically and emotionally.
It’s not good. But. It’s not as outright awful as I was expecting.
It is a TV Movie, so managing expectations accordingly, the effects are…OK. Robo’s suit certainly looks the part, but the face makeup is dire.
However, it has a decent level of violence. And includes at least attempts at the satirical news inserts. They’re a bit too on the nose to work for me, but I appreciate the effort.
It’s all painfully average though. Nothing utterly awful. Nothing truly decent or above par. You can certainly tell someone gave a damn, but that most were just in it for a pay cheque or holding on to the rights.
If we were living in the pre-streaming days, I don’t think I’d consider my evening wasted if I stuck this on. But, we don’t, and so I’m afraid I’m going to bow out gracefully and stick the original on.
was that the one with the invisible truck ? One of the most wonderfully WTF moments ever
The Neon Demon
Surely it can't be as unsettling and wackdoo as Only God Forgives, okay so I was wrong, really strange and a bit like Sucker Punch I suspect the joke regarding (far too) young flesh is sort of on the viewer but without all the pop video action bits, with an ending that might top ‘The Perfection’ in its bonkers bonkerness
Watched this over 2 nights with Mrs Aash now that it’s on Disney plus. We both enjoyed it a lot more than we expected to. I think it’s better than the first one, maybe because it felt like a more original story. I was always in the camp that the first one was just dances with wolves in space.
The film looks fantastic, as expected and the underwater scenes with the wildlife are really quite relaxing and serene. You could imagine David Attenborough narrating it.
Overall it was good, if overlong, and I find that I’m surprisingly looking forward to the next instalment. Considering that after seeing the original I wasn’t bothered about the prospect of a sequel.
British horror comedy, in which 4 young idiots on a Duke of Edinburgh course are hunted across the Scottish Highlands by a demented upper class twit.
This is good fun. Not much in the way of gore or violence so far, with the comedy coming from the ineptitude of the main characters. And the Police’s own ineptitude.
Automatically Appended Next Post: Dead Again
What happens when you’ve seen Shaun of the Dead, Hot Fuzz and Worlds End, and reckon you can do that? But in fact, you can’t do that?
You get this soulless knock-off cash in. No tension. No laughs. No discernible talent anywhere.
To top it off, a bloody awful “song” for the credits which has nothing to do with the theme of the film.
This is a very charming movie about a naive, childlike bear sent to do hard time for a crime he didn’t commit. Lots of excellent use of set-up-and-pay-off blended into quirky character moments. Hugh Grant is captivatingly despicable, and also plays a good villain in the movie. Worth watching for the prison sequences alone.
Watch it!
Sharknado 5: Global Swarming
This film is the Infinity War to the next movie’s Endgame. In itself, it is less satisfying than previous entries. However, they’ve upped their comedic stunt-casting to new heights.
I watched a lot of films this weekend. No idea why.....
Across the Spider-verse I like the style and feel of the first one alot. This one builds on that and has some good moments. Very self-referential and "mate".
However, I must have been the only idiot in the cinema that did not realize that it ended on a cliff hanger set-up for the next movie. That is bad form movie. Bad form!
Conan The Jason Mamoa re-boot in 2010 or so.
You know, there is a reason these Sword-and-Sorcery flicks do not click. Perhaps it is the casual misogyn, the rinse-and-repeat plots, or the badly edited fight scenes. Jason Mamoa (and the other actors really) does his best and is a strong Conan, but the "plot" is so by-the-numbers that it ultimately feels stale.
Now You See Me A group of magicians pull of some big magic tricks, with a bit of theft on the side. An FBI agent and a magic de-bunker try to chase them down. All-star cast in this one.
This movie is not half as clever as it really wants to be. They make a big mistake by explaining the first "trick" to the audience, and then so armed, it is easy for the audience to predict every move after that. At least, I thought so.
Knight and Day Cameron Dias and Tom Cruise vehicle where Tom gets to play his manic-self and Dias gets to do her schtick too. It is exactly what you think it is as an action-comedy of the vintage. I would think it is a Mr. and Mrs. Smith knock-off, but I am not sure what came first.
This is the type of movie that Hollywood barely makes anymore, because it is a mid-budget romance/adventure flick not based on source material from a book, play, comic, etc. After watching the film, I am not sure Hollywood skipping on these types of movies anymore is a bad thing. However, it seems tailor made for modern streaming!
Despite seeing a lot of movies, I ma not sure i would really recommend any of them. <shrug>
Pretty dang bad. Helmsworth is completely wasted and for the life of me I cannot remember another actor in it.
What if Snow White was an action movie? And what if catapults caused explosions? And the what if the magic mirror turned into a CGI monster for the final fight?
I won't say it should be burned out of space and time but I will say skip it.
Oh my word, there's a sequel.
And I only have till June 30 to see it on Netflix!
Pretty dang bad. Helmsworth is completely wasted and for the life of me I cannot remember another actor in it.
What if Snow White was an action movie? And what if catapults caused explosions? And the what if the magic mirror turned into a CGI monster for the final fight?
I won't say it should be burned out of space and time but I will say skip it.
Oh my word, there's a sequel.
And I only have till June 30 to see it on Netflix!
The first Extraction was an out-of-nowhere surprise film. Not especially great, and certainly not a classic for the ages, it did distinguish itself with inventive action scenes including some exhilarating one-shot chase and fight scenes with fantastic stunt work. Seriously, look into the behind-the-scenes stuff on how they did some of the vehicle scenes, it's incredible. It was quite a bit of fun.
The sequel starts with that energy. We get the immediate aftermath of the first film (which serves to justify why the story is continuing) and we get a lot more from the main character's support team. Then we get into the movie-proper and we get an even more elaborate and well-stage action/chase sequence that has to be seen to believed. It's 21 minutes of good non-stop action, and whilst there are camera cuts using clever screen wipe background/foreground element tricks, it is put together as one continuing shot that takes us from the bowels of a prison to a tumbling cargo train fighting off helicopters.
The problem is that after that sequence, it never reaches the same height. The siege of the multi-story building is interesting, and it's nice that the bad guys both have a good plan of attack and are heavily geared up for the fight, but it's done in a conventional manner that makes it just another action sequence. The finale is similar to that, only shorter and less satisfying. Also everyone is bullet-proof, and it eventually gets rather silly when the main bad guy and the main girl both empty most of a pistol mag into one another and still aren't dead. Yes, they're wearing armour, but it's still stupid.
Overall it's better than above average simply because of the good and inventive action, and it's nice to have people talking in their natural accents/languages for the entire film, but it doesn't have he energy of the first.
The Covenant - Duty/10
The strangest thing about The Covenant is that if no one told you it was a Guy Ritchie film, you wouldn't know! It is completely devoid of his usual visual flare, none of his cross-cutting and tightly intertwined plotting, clever use of flash back and voice-over, and certainly none of his dark humour. If that sounds like a criticism, it actually isn't, both because all those flourishes would be completely out of place/inappropriate for the subject matter of this film, and because The Covenant feels like a deeply serious passion project that the director wanted to tell. It's outside of his wheelhouse, and I think that makes it a better film. He can't rely on the stuff he normally uses, because it would cheapen and worsen the film as a whole.
If you have never heard of this film before then I don't blame you. As Extraction 2 is a Netflix film, The Covenant is an Amazon film. It stars Jake Gyllan... Gillan... Jigglypuff. Jake Jigglypuff as a US army sergeant tasked with hunting down IED factories in Afghanistan (2018 I believe?). He's dissatisfied with what he's doing because he and his team are turning up empty every time. At a routine checkpoint a bomb goes off, killing a member of his team as well as their local interpreter. As a result they get a new interpreter, who is a bit of a hard-case and he doesn't really gel with Jake Wigglyworm's character. The first half of the film centres on the interpreter saving them from an ambush, and then saving Jake Gigglefits' life and dragging him by hand cross-country after his unit is wiped out. But the main part of the film is what happens after that, with Jake Wiggleroom back at home and eaten up by the guilt and the debt that he owes this man, a man who has gone into hiding from the Taliban and wasn't given the promised visas for him, his wife, and his newborn son. Eventually Mysterio decides enough is enough, and goes back himself (and with money to get some help from a private contractor group... and boy do they bring the rain!) to rescue the man and his family.
It's a very serious film with some fantastic action sequences and great character work from Jake Gyllenhaal and from Dar Salim, who plays the interpreter (and has a passing resemblance to a younger Temura Morrison). Definitely worth watching, both because of the performances, the subject matter, a very different style of film from Guy Ritche, and because I doubt we're going to get many serious Afghan war films, so this is somewhat unique.
This is a weird movie. It’s clearly a vanity project for Vin Diesel, but it’s also an attempted franchise and a cargo cult Sci Fi epic. It feels like it was constructed from the first book of a five part series, with half the pages torn out for time.
One area where it shines is production design. It has a specific look that makes every set, every spaceship, every costume (other than the black tank top) distinctive to the Riddickverse. It feels like Lynch’s Dune in that regard. It’s worth watching just for the sets and props.
And that’s a good thing because the acting is stiff and stilted. Even Karl Urban comes off badly in this film. Only the Lord Marshal makes the pseudo-gravitas work for him.
If you’re looking for a good movie, this isn’t it. If you’re looking for an enjoyably flawed ambitious failure, this is the film for you.
H.B.M.C. wrote: Come on now: Seagal's an awful person. Don't put that stink on Vin.
Fair point. I only meant it in the sense that he comes across as an Egomaniacal action star with a clause in his contract outlining how few punches his character may receive in a film. The first time I saw the film, I wasn’t sure whether he was genuinely oblivious or just committed to the bit. After seeing Riddick, I was sure.
Poochie would also have been a good comparison, as when he’s not on screen, everyone is asking, “Where’s Riddick?”
For me? Chronicles of Riddick should’ve been an awful film.
But it’s just pulpy enough to work and turn out enjoyable. Yes it rips off elements of Dune, Conan and a bunch of other movies and tropes? But somehow….it just sort of works.
This is a weird movie. It’s clearly a vanity project for Vin Diesel, but it’s also an attempted franchise and a cargo cult Sci Fi epic. It feels like it was constructed from the first book of a five part series, with half the pages torn out for time.
One area where it shines is production design. It has a specific look that makes every set, every spaceship, every costume (other than the black tank top) distinctive to the Riddickverse. It feels like Lynch’s Dune in that regard. It’s worth watching just for the sets and props.
And that’s a good thing because the acting is stiff and stilted. Even Karl Urban comes off badly in this film. Only the Lord Marshal makes the pseudo-gravitas work for him.
If you’re looking for a good movie, this isn’t it. If you’re looking for an enjoyably flawed ambitious failure, this is the film for you.
Vin Diesel didn't get the rights to the Riddick character until after The Chronicles of Riddick, but he was a producer in the film. He got the rights for his cameo in Tokyo Drift instead of being paid. If anything was a vanity project it was the film Riddick.
Chronicles was definitely a love letter from him and Twohy to the character, with a ton of Vin’s nerdy rpg ideas mixed in. While it’s not as obnoxious as Riddick in that regard, it’s still blatantly self-indulgent. It counts as a vanity project.
I absolutely adore me a Horror Anthology flick, or Portmanteau. Have done ever since I saw the occasional Amicus production cluttering up the late night schedule as a nipper.
And this is a pretty solid one. Indeed a cursory google shows this is in fact….based on Clive Barker short stories.
If you’re in the U.K., and you’ve got Disney+, give it a watch. Being Clive Barker in origin the thrust is mostly from the atmosphere, rather than a ton of gore.
A mid 80’s catastrophe. A diet Rambo clone, where a not-actually-dead-cop is recruited to become some kind of Kung-Fu assassin type wot can run on water.
This film has many flaws. Not only does his trainer have a proper Charlie Chan accent? But yellow face.
The right scenes are lame. The effects are non-existent.
I’m only watching this because I recognised the name from when I was much younger.
It does have Fred Ward in it though.
Automatically Appended Next Post: Nope. I can’t. I can’t finish it. It’s too awful.
On with…
Young Sherlock Holmes
This? Is a belter. Some of the earliest 3D CGI used in a film, but plenty of practical and stop motion effects.
Whilst not that warmly received on release, it’s one I can watch over and over and over. As a kid some of the scenes were genuinely scary. As an adult, I can marvel at just how bloody good they are.
Now it’s not one for very young children because those scenes are so effective. But for tweens and up, this is a solid adventure romp.
On one hand I’m sad it never got a sequel, but on the other, sequels are comfortably in “be careful what you wish for” territory.
And thought I type this on Midsummer’s Day? Save this for the colder months. Fire on, popcorn in bowl, hot chocolate in mug, and enjoy.
A mid 80’s catastrophe. A diet Rambo clone, where a not-actually-dead-cop is recruited to become some kind of Kung-Fu assassin type wot can run on water.
This film has many flaws. Not only does his trainer have a proper Charlie Chan accent? But yellow face.
The right scenes are lame. The effects are non-existent.
I’m only watching this because I recognised the name from when I was much younger.
It does have Fred Ward in it though.
The film makes more sense if you're familiar with the source material. It's based on The Destroyer series of novels first published in 1971 (therefore predating Rambo by a decade) and still going with over 150 books in the series. It's a bit of a mash-up of various pulp genres (as can be seen in his rogue's gallery) and should be read with tongue firmly planted in cheek.
Hopefully the planned TV series will do a better job of telling the story then the film did.
I fondly remember repeats of the original TV show and it's movies and missed this at the cinema so gave this a look at on Prime over the weekend. And it's.... OK? Ish? I don't know if it was a failed attempt at new franchise but it didn't really grab me. It was all 'cool sixties' but it didn't seem 'Man from UNCLE-y' that often, although the scene where the torturer burns to death in his own chair while the Solo and Kuryakin discuss what to do with him was funny (OK when I write it out like that, it doesn't sound funny... but it was).
Cavill was a good Napoleon Solo, Hammer was completely different to David Macallum (I guess they were going for a 'chalk and cheese' set up) so it didn't hit home with me. Hugh Grant probably would have made a good 'new' Waverly, but I guess I wasn't the only one who thought 'meh'.
For some inexplicable reason Remo Williams has a cult following. I blame the fact that it was on UHF TV channels in the 90's every. single. Saturday.
Man from UNCLE should be way better than it is. The component pieces are good. The actors are good. The story is solid. However, I think it is let down by a by-the-numbers climax.
Young Sherlock Holmes had a great score. Waxing Elizabeth is a track I listen to all the time while assembling and painting. All the cult and hallucination scenes are fun.
Another of those movies you’d think I’d have seen years ago, but no!
It’s pretty good fun. Harrison Ford is basically President Han Solo, including emerging from a floor hatch.
Kind of interesting to see it post 9/11, an event which changed our world forever. We see a US President tell a Middle Eastern country “we don’t negotiate with terrorists” a good few years before, well. They had to say it and mean it.
It is a bit Team America Puff Piece, but that’s the era and the nature so hardly a criticism or surprise.
Supporting cast is pretty mega too. Dean Stockwell! Gary Oldman! Glenn Close!
Decent late 90’s action thriller silly gun fun.
Automatically Appended Next Post: The Rock
Seems I’m off on a 90’s action movie odyssey this evening.
For a Michael Bay movie? This is unusually good. Not only do we have a villain with actual motivation, but Sean Connery and Nic Cage make a solid double act. And let’s face it, this is pretty much a Secret Bond Film.
It’s kind of let down by the villain’s men being incredibly unlikable. It’s touched on that whilst he’s never served with them, he knows of their actions and reputation. But surely he’d know Captain Billy Big-chin and Tony Todd were douchebags?
This is a really solid, enjoyable movie right up until Ares arrives. My first viewing was more positive, but on second viewing, knowing this was coming somewhat dampened my enjoyment.
Air Force One is acceptable 90's action nonsense. I'm not going to recommend you watch it, but I'm also not going to say to avoid. I often get this one mixed up with Executive Decision, which is only worth watching to cheer when Segal dies
The Rock on the other hand is a fantastic piece of cinema. Michael Bay may be a blight on our screens, but the few moments of magic he produces almost make up for it The Avatar thread asks why that film had no cultural impact. Go and watch The Rock and quote Nic and Sean endlessly and you'll see cultural impact. It's bonkers in all the right ways.
"Winners go home and **** the prom queen"
"I'll take pleasure in gutting you, boy"
While you're at it, go and watch ConAir and Face Off. The 90's was an era of sheer lunacy!
This is a really solid, enjoyable movie right up until Ares arrives. My first viewing was more positive, but on second viewing, knowing this was coming somewhat dampened my enjoyment.
Yep, I think it's a commendable movie with enough structure to keep happy those who like action and those who like to look a bit deeper. Until the last 20 minutes. Then it turns into an unforgivable mess.
I’ll see your Executive Decision and raise you *checks title* erm….Executive Command.
Starring no-one you’ve ever heard of before or since, but at least one of them kind of looks like Kevin Bacon, if I got you to drink 12 pints and poked you in both eyes and you squinted really really hard. Let’s just call him Bobby Gammon.
Also, Not James Spader.
I’m not expecting much. And I suspect I’ll still be sorely disappointed.
Oh wow. Mere seconds in and they’ve ripped off The Rock’s opening scene with no style or panache or….special effects, other than splashing something that looked like population paste against the window.
Automatically Appended Next Post: Wait. Brian Cranston just appeared.
This…is bits of Executive Decision, Air Force One and The Rock mashed up. The bad bits. The awful bits. The bits that after a particularly bad time on the bog just won’t flush bits.
Not in a fun, appreciable “Bubble & Squeak for brekkie” way. Just…..’we’ve got funding and a way to dodge tax’ way.
How this wasn’t sued into oblivion I’ll never know.
Automatically Appended Next Post: Oh those pansies!
We get the (already dubious) air tunnel scene. But they didn’t even job a Pound Shop Steven Seagull. Not even an Allan Albatross, Barry Budgerigar or Peter Peregrine-Falcon.
Booooo!!! BOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!
They didn’t even give turbulence as an explanation for why that plan went wrong.
Automatically Appended Next Post: And one last rip off. Where the goodie staffs the population paste causing toxin into the baddy’s face, also killing baddy’s pilot. And just like Nic Cage has to inject himself (in the neck, the massive wuss) to save his own life.
Except….unlike Nic Cage, he’s clearly already coughing up things you’d much prefer to be kept on the inside.
Also, army/marine/whatever hard man with the absolute worst “it is real, honest” neck tattoo I could swear was put out of our misery earlier, being all shot to death is suddenly…..fine?
Executive Decision is notable for being a Steven Segal film where he dies in the first 10m, leaving us with Kurt Russel for the rest of the film. I'd call that a significant upgrade.
And The Rock has an amazing score. Sure, it's Hanz Zimmer at his most Hanz Zimmerest, but it's still good.
Fond memories of this. Saw it before I really knew what a weirdo Seagal is, so his rather sudden departure was genuinely surprising.
Watching the opening scene sign more educated eyes? It’s funny that even in his heyday he didn’t half lumber around the shop. No grace whatsoever.
Oh…he’s just been told one of his men got jobbed….no change in facial expression. Just his customary “hard man” scowl.
But don’t worry, here’s Kurt Russell to make everything better. And David Suchet, who previously I’d only known from Poirot will be along in a minute.
Like Air Force One, the sad fact of 9/11 has somewhat changed this movie. For instance, the baddies sneak a weapon aboard disguised as cameras etc. having flown a fair few times pre 9/11, that’s….actually fairly plausible. Post 9/11 however it’s just gonna look ridiculous.
Automatically Appended Next Post: Broken Arrow
A John Woo film starring John Travolta. Also Christian Slater and Kurtwood Smith.
Kind of fun, but oddly restrained. Like Hollywood and Woo hadn’t quite sussed each other out, and what each could bring to the table.
What’s here is good fun. Hokey plot about Travolta nicking some nukes (Nicky Nukey…is that a trope?) for….well….money. Honestly I’m torn whether that’s lazy writing or a refreshingly honest motivation. I mean “Nicky Nukey Blackmail Profit” could be both at the end of the day.
Action is where this just doesn’t quite work. John Woo has his style. And it’s a style as I ventured above I’m not sure Hollywood had properly adapted at the time.
Certainly his next US movie was Face/Off (which is gonna be up next, like tomorrow next. Not right now next) and I recall that being a lot smoother. But Wikipedia suggests the underrated Van Damme vehicle Hard Target came a few years before.
I genuinely mean that one is underrated, as whilst I’ve not seen it for a while (again, it’s on my list) I remember it being quite good fun. A fairly 80’s Grindhouse plot but made very much in the 90’s.
But yeah. Broken Arrow. It’s perfectly serviceable and certainly better than far too many 90’s action nonsense films. But it just falls short of being Objectively Good.
I recalled someone suggesting this as so bad it’s good, so we gave it a shot.
It was surprisingly entertaining. Not good, but fun. I was never bored by it. Looked like most of the actors were having a great time. If any things made the film outright bad, they would be the ‘borderline experimental’ editing and the unintentionally hilarious score. Someone made some baffling choices after most of the cast and crew finished the film they thought they were making.
PS: I feel like I must be getting old when my reaction to Halle Berry in leather is “sure, she’s conventionally attractive, but how about that Alex Borstein?”
The Death of Superman Lives
First for some context, I looked up “Kevin Smith Superman” on YouTube and had a great time. Then I wanted to know more about the failed Tim Burton/Nicholas Cage Superman movie, Superman Lives.
This documentary is on YouTube, and well worth a watch if you like behind the scenes stuff and ambitious failures. Even if those kind of Hollywood stories aren’t your thing, if you like Sci Fi it’s worth watching for the concept art alone. Really bizarre takes all around.
Automatically Appended Next Post: Re:Broken Arrow, I find that to be one of those memory-hole movies that I remember watching but can’t remember a single thing that happens in it. Even at the time it came across as a cookie cutter action movie…which by today’s standards probably makes it a tightly-scripted, sumptuously choreographed stunt show extravaganza.
Regular viewers may be aware I have a love for anthology horror flicks, and indeed have a fair collection.
But there’s one I saw years ago which I just cannot identify. It’s not a Creepshow. It’s not a Tales from the Darkside.
The segment I recall best involved a balding middle aged gent that undergoes a hair replacement treatment. It works! Long luscious locks manifest. Only….it’s not hair. It’s skinny creepy worm things! And I think his entire body becomes comprised of them.
JCvD and his magnificent mullet go up against naughty-evil-wicked-bad Lance Henriksen and Arnold “he was Imhotep” Vosloo in a John Woo action flick.
It’s daft, but oddly low-key daft.
Basically Lance Henriksen runs a “dangerous game” manhunt type thing. He recruits homeless bums, and then hunts them down in a pretty one-sided affair.
Until he crosses JCvD of course.
Cool stunts and shoot outs ensue, and the paper thin plot endures the course well enough.
It absolutely reeks of early 90’s action nonsense. Such as JCvD punching out a Rattle snake, biting off its Rattle, then leaving it as a (successful) trap for our baddies. JCvD jump-kicking a bloke off a motorcycle. JCvD balancing feet on the seat of a motorcycle, shooting the occupants of a car then crashing into and over it.
If like me you have a penchant for such silliness? Get it watched, especially as younger Dakkanauts may have missed it. If you’re really lucky, it’ll push some Seagal out your mind, making for a happier world.
Automatically Appended Next Post: Also, bonus points for Wilfred Brimley.
Double extra bonus points for Wilfred Brimley blowing up baddies.
Air Force One is acceptable 90's action nonsense. I'm not going to recommend you watch it, but I'm also not going to say to avoid. I often get this one mixed up with Executive Decision, which is only worth watching to cheer when Segal dies
...
Hooooold it! I recently watched Executive Decision and enjoyed it way more than I thought I would. An exciting 90s action thriller.
@Mad Doc Grotsnik: Oh heck yes. that's a fun one.
I may have to watch Executive Command. What I just did watch was Rumble in the Bronx. Maybe it was the first Jackie Chan film I watched back in t'day. I was completely sockless, because they'd been blown off by the end of the film. And only THEN we learn how many of the stunts he did with a broken friggin foot! It's still an insane film. Just greatly entertaining.
Now then now then now then then now then then now.
Once again it’s a 90’s actioner, with John Travolta before he became annoying again, Nic Cage before he became annoying, and directed by John Woo.
Having started strong with Hard Target, then kind of been studio swamped with Broken Arrow, John Woo is back in commanding form with this slice of abject nonsense. Which…..works really well!
Of our two leads, Nic Cage is my favourite and for my money the better actor. He has an intensity when he’s the baddie. And when he’s the goodie, it’s a different but no less enjoyable intensity.
Travolta sadly kind of phones it in somewhat. I mean, he’s not awful, but his performances just don’t match Cage’s.
In an ideal world of Daft Action Flicks, our leads would’ve been Schwarzenegger and Stallone. But we live in the completely crappy real world so we didn’t get that.
What we did get is a very silly but highly enjoyable flick,
Also, the SFX that are in this film are genuinely quite good. When you see John Travolta’s face floating in the jar? It really looks the part. Fantastical as the surgery is, it’s at least aware there’s more to it than just gluing one fruit loop’s face on to another fruit loop’s head.
Definitely give this one a watch. If nothing else, it’s a good laugh!
Just don’t think about how Castor Troy was able to hold the surgeon hostage through his entire face transplant procedure, and how the surgeon was able to perform a cutting edge procedure with no prep and no assistance.
It’s fun how John Travolta’s Nicholas Cage impression slowly morphs into his Battlefield Earth persona over the course of the movie.
The Snow White sequel without Snow White how apparently costs too much these days.
So it's Chris Helmsworth's Huntsman vs Emily Blunt as Not~Elsa. It's OK at times. Helmsworth gets to show a bit more acting chops and it feels a lot less forced then turning Snow White into Lord of the Rings.
Still not worth seeing mind you, but an improvement.
BobtheInquisitor wrote: She didn’t cost too much. She cheated on R Pat with the director of Snow White and the Huntsman, and neither was invited to the sequel.
A U.K. movie in the style of Death Wish, starring Lou Ferrigno. Available on Prime under the name “Rage”.
This is a deeply, deeply unpleasant movie. As with all revenge thrillers we of course expect something unpleasant to happen to our hero’s love ones. But there is not bloody need for it to be this graphic or sustained. I’ve normally a strong stomach for such things, but this time I had to fast forward. Because again again, there is no reason for such scenes to be so graphic nor sustained. These things best hinted at. Done off screen.
But, now that is out of the way, we’re off to the races as Mr Ferrigno has his arse in his hands a mind for vengeance.
Automatically Appended Next Post: The actual ass kickery is pretty good. Whilst advancing in years, Ferrigno is in amazing shape. Whilst not exactly athletic, the fight scenes take that into account, and so don’t come across silly or daft, unlike Seagal where we see him lumber from place to place then Body Double, back to lumbering.
However, the punishment dealt out to the baddies just doesn’t compare to the brutality of that earlier scene. Like. At all. Which makes this all somewhat flaccid in the end. Yes they all end up completely dead to death. But it just doesn’t feel like Justice, and as such the deep and genuine unpleasantness of their Main Crime is utterly unjustified in the film’s wider context.
After an unnecessarily long opening featuring a minor character from Batman's Justice League comic, the movie swings into high gear showing us what's happened with Michael Keaton's Batman over the last 30 years. I can't wait for the Prequel (Midquel) that shows us just when Bat Michael learned about the multiverse.
All kidding aside I was pleasantly surprised that a film which went through 5 directors, almost 10 years of development, and reportedly 45 (!!) writers came out pretty good. Miller may be scum, but had some funny moments. If not for the behind the scenes drama I'd be eager for more of this.
A perfectly cromulent remake of Terminator 2: OMG So Good.
Nice twist at the end
Spoiler:
After many hardships the heroes find themselves in a 50s bunker thinking it will be the Sky Net central core but all the computers are decades old. Then they realize Sky Net is software and already in computers around the world. There is no central core to blow up. All they can do is wait out the nuclear war.
Yeah, T3 was perfectly alright. It's the Temple of Doom of the Terminator franchise. Probably my favourite Kristana Loken film too! So that's gotta be worth something, right? (only other one I can remember is Bloodrayne 1 and that was pretty darned boring except for Meat Loaf's bordello).
Sigur wrote: Yeah, T3 was perfectly alright. It's the Temple of Doom of the Terminator franchise. Probably my favourite Kristana Loken film too! So that's gotta be worth something, right? (only other one I can remember is Bloodrayne 1 and that was pretty darned boring except for Meat Loaf's bordello).
T3 is the last Terminator that gets passing grades - it's got the general conceits of the setting alright, basically re-tells T2, which is not bad in itself as you can do much worse than re-tell a great movie, and does some more exploration of the 'guardian Terminator' concept as well as that whole thing about Fate vs. No-Fate. Not groundbreaking or even very creative, but it's a Terminator movie that delivers what you'd want and expect from a Terminator movie. It's probably nobodies favourite film, but also not on many 'hate' listst.
The Terminator, with John Connor having gone off-grid, hunting down his Lieutenants instead, and only finding John through luck/fate.
John going off-grid in the first place.
The beginning and I suppose end of Judgement Day in general.
Apparently James Cameron has been working on a new script for another Terminator movie since about February of this year; it's supposed to be more about Skynet/Legion this time... together with the two Alien-Franchise movies currently in production (one in Hollywood hell since basically forever, one actually filming since March) it looks like the 80s won't let us go for quite some time
Lets hope not, T3 is passable due to Ms Dane's and the other lady, but given the whole thing is essentially Sarah's story trying to do them without her it was hiding to nothing
And yes she is back for the last road crash but that got clobbered with "grrrl powa" by numbers and had no point at all (although tip of the hat to Ms Davis for doing a lot of sit ups and the like !)
I'd actually forgotten this was a thing, and I watched it as much because the runtime closely matched the time I had available as much as any expectations that it'd be good.
So imagine my surprise when it turns out it's really quite ok.
I'll qualify anything I say by pointing out Clerks, Mallrats and Chasing Amy were important elements of my late teens/early 20s, so I have a certain affection for Smith that his later more divisive attempts have never completely shaken, but I'm struggling to find too much to really criticise in Clerks 3.
I suspect this is quite a personal movie for Smith. The whole narrative is kick-started by a character surviving a heart attack that should have killed them, and subsequently, in true meta style, the characters from the first movie, now middle aged, set about making a movie which bears a not unsubstantial resemblance to the original Clerks movie.
The fact I'm struggling to find much to criticise shouldn't be taken as a ringing endorsement. This isn't a great movie by any stretch. It's funny without ever being laugh out loud, it's a little overly sentimental to the point that Smith from 20 years ago would probably vomit, and as a direct result lacks the cutting edge of his earlier films.
But for all that, I enjoyed dropping in on Dante and Randal again. That so many of the cast were willing to return, not to mention the cameos, really makes for a fitting end, even if only hacks make sequels.
As gangster films go it's a tough one to criticise, but I'm going to anyway. It's neither as fluid as Snatch / Lock Stock nor as precise as The Departed. It sits in this middle ground where half of the movie looks like it has had a lot of attention paid to details and then the other half seems to be whatever was shot by the camera was good enough. Daniel Craig is a walking coma for the first 45 minutes, only waking up and paying any interest as we get towards the run down. It really is a very middling film. I can't commend it but then I also can't say it's particularly bad. To emphasise how meh I am about it, I would recommend watching 51st State over this and that's not exactly the highest quality cinema either.
@Henry: Yeah, I also found Layer Cake to be .....okay? I can't remember much about it. There was something with coffee and Craig talking to old gangstery people and being rich. For a more interesting "early" Craig film, try Enduring Love (the one with the hot air balloon).
My sister in law showed me loooooooooong parts of Bedazzled. I'd never seen the film before, but it seems rather funny. Hurley getting to wear nice outfits, Fraser getting to play funny skits. Both are good in this one, and there are some bits which genuinely made me laugh. ("Poo-bished" somehow got me cracking up).
Also watched an episode of Andor. It looks alright. You can tell good from bad actors by how loud they talk. If they whisper, they're no good, if they TALK they're good.
Animated film, based on a graphic novel a few years back by ND Stevenson (showrunner for the She-ra reboot).
Utterly fantastic. Intended to just start it and watch a bit while exercising, but got caught up and watched the whole thing (fairly standard movie length).
Gets heavy a times (don't want to spoil anything), but amazing.
I really like Terminator 3. And the only thing I remember from Hard Target is Lance Henriksen trying to dismantle a live grenade before it blows him up.
Flinty wrote: Thanks Voss. I was trying to get my daughter to watch that yesterday and she declined. I’ll probably just watch it myself
Its definitely worth watching. Its probably worth watching before showing it to kids, as it veers from kid-friendly to I-can-see-parents-freaking-out at times. I'm not a good judge of that, as my only frame of reference is rural parents freaking out about what's in the library and demanding things-they-don't-like be banned.
Just to be clear,
Spoiler:
Amongst other things (the normal stuff people-don't-like), when it does go heavy, suicidal ideation and murder-the-Other jump to the front of the story
Was mentioned earlier in the film, but I’ve never previously seen it.
It’s…OK, I guess. Not quite average, but not disastrous. Samuel L Jackson, Robert Carlyle and Sean Pertwee are of course fantastic as always. But….urgh. Here comes Rhys Ifans. I’ll never understand how he gets roles, as he’s universally awful.
I’ll see it out, but I can’t see it going on my regular or even occasional rewatch list.
Well, I did say it wasn't the highest quality cinema. Robert Carlyle looks like he was having a bit of a laugh through filming at the least. He and Jackson make for an amusing odd couple
Mad Doc Grotsnik wrote: The 51st State ...
It’s…OK, I guess. Not quite average, but not disastrous. ...
My thoughts exactly. It's not horrible, but I don't feel like I wanna see it again too soon.
It basically hinges on Jackson and Carlyle, but also props to Emily Mortimer for adding to that chemistry quite nicely.
If I had to describe it using a Crap Analogy? It’s like a robot trying to bake a cake. Yes the ingredients are there, but the mix is off. Like it gave them a cursory stir, but never having seen a cake batter nothing is blended. Just a quick couple of stirs and into the oven, where the degree in temperature has been misunderstood as degrees in angle. Jackson, Carlyle and Mortimer are the frosting, hence they’re still good.
Mad Doc Grotsnik wrote: The 51st State ...
It’s…OK, I guess. Not quite average, but not disastrous. ...
My thoughts exactly. It's not horrible, but I don't feel like I wanna see it again too soon.
It basically hinges on Jackson and Carlyle, but also props to Emily Mortimer for adding to that chemistry quite nicely.
If I had to describe it using a Crap Analogy? It’s like a robot trying to bake a cake. Yes the ingredients are there, but the mix is off. Like it gave them a cursory stir, but never having seen a cake batter nothing is blended. Just a quick couple of stirs and into the oven, where the degree in temperature has been misunderstood as degrees in angle. Jackson, Carlyle and Mortimer are the frosting, hence they’re still good.
But really well cast for the role. 
about it.
For some reason the bald man who's Castor Troy's lackey is quite the memorable character.