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Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2018/12/06 16:31:42


Post by: Easy E


Greetings,

This thread is intended to provide very short reviews of movies you have been watching lately. Nothing in depth, and a quick thought about if others should watch it.

I have some crappy public-domain disc of old horror movies I have been slowly watching. Here are some mini-reviews:

1. House on Haunted Hill- This movie has some cracking dialogue, especially between the Husband and Wife characters. The plot... ludicrous..... but so delicious. Classic, and should probably be seen.

2. The Ghost!- A Gothic horror that is one of the loose horror movie series featuring Dr. Hichcock. Has Barbara Steele, so that is good. Otherwise, a typical gaslighting type of scenario full of scandalous behavior. Pass.

3. Dominique is Dead- A 70's take on gaslighting. Scooby-Doo level of whodunnit. Not good.

4. Bloody Pit of Horror- This one is amaze-balls lit.... really it craves nothing more than riffing. This perfect film lives only to torture the corruption of impurity from its production. None will survive. Must watch with a group and drinks.

5. Nightmare Castle- A black and white gothic horror with Barbara Steele. This was made before the Ghost, but is much more entertaining. The baddie is indeed very, very bad. I enjoyed this one. Worth a watch.

6. The Undertaker and His Pals- What.... The.... Hell..... Did.... I .... Just ..... Watch! This movie cries out for weed, LSD, or something much stronger. Must be seen to be believed, but make no mistake that this movie is terrible. It is of the same level of movies my friends and I made as teenagers, except this one was released to Drive-in movie theaters and people actual spent money to watch...... I just can't even.


Not part of the anthology....

Cloverfield- I had started watching this a while ago but the shaky-cam forced my wife to tap out. A decade later I finally finished it. Clearly it is an allegory for the terror of 9/11, and the director (Matthew Reeves NOT J.J. Abrams) even mentions United 93 in the commentary. Anyway, 20 somethings from upper middle class and higher backgrounds from an episode of Felicity or Dawson's Creek have their meaningless lives interrupted when bad things happen in New York. Beware of shaky-cam. Love the scene with the B-2 bomber. Watch it.

Your turn.....


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2018/12/06 18:46:46


Post by: Yodhrin


Saw Venom the other day. Was it necessary? No. Do I like what it signifies re Sony/Marvel/Spiderman rights? No. Was it good? Eh, it was pretty alright actually. Big, dumb, with a villain who you keep asking "how the feth does everyone around this guy not realise he's a total loon?!", but it actually ended up being quite funny in parts and the action is decent. Worth a watch if you're in the mood to switch off a little and just snigger at the Venom/Brock internal banter.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2018/12/06 19:19:01


Post by: Excommunicatus


Still Game.

Scottish. Funny.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2018/12/06 20:04:00


Post by: Manchu


Taste the Blood of Dracula (1970) - Respectable gentlemen by day, reckless hedonists by night - a trio of bored bourgeois contract with a depraved cultist to sample some real debauchery but choke at the last minute. The horror they unwittingly unleash tears their families to shreds, as their teenage children become thralls of Dracula! In a compelling twist, the infamous Count is more a perverse spirit of malice working through the young people against their elders rather than an active force in his own right. The story really captures the anger of kids about their parents’ hypocrisy, something that may resonate with young people again today. Just remember, your parents felt the same way in their day. I give this film extra points for its colorful cathouse scenes and the put-upon, camp major domo who runs the place.

Dracula A.D. 1972 (1972) - A Dracula film set in its own present times and it’s wall-to-wall 1970s funkiness, at least as imagined by its possibly quite square and definitely middle-aged writer. The cool young people may like to “get down, man” but they are really just good kids at heart. Except, that is, for “Johnny Alucard,” an occult-obsessed punk who serves his friends up to the fanged one in exchange vampiric power. Fortunately, concerned grandfather Peter Cushing steps in to save modern youth from the ancient evil of Count Dracula! This picture watches like an anti drug after-school special, a big step backwards from Taste The Blood, despite of (or perhaps because of?) its contemporary setting. On the plus side, we get a generous helping of Mr. Cushing.

The Satanic Rites of Dracula (1973) - The director/writer team who brought us A.D. ‘72 follow up with a direct sequel that has nearly nothing to do with the previous film ... which is a good thing! Whereas its predecessor was merely modern, Satanic Rites is truly ultramodern: a conspiracy within the government, aided and abetted by corporate greed, to destroy the world with an engineered plague! And of course Dracula is somehow behind it all, despite being a medieval Romanian nobleman. This would be the final confrontation between Lee’s Dracula and Cushing’s Van Helsing and it goes out on a fiery bang, literally. Although occasionally long-winded, the sheer weirdness of this movie, combined with how many trends it either inspired or anticipated in later storytelling, make this a must watch for vintage horror fans.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2018/12/06 22:50:54


Post by: Easy E


 Manchu wrote:
Taste the Blood of Dracula (1970) - Respectable gentlemen by day, reckless hedonists by night - a trio of bored bourgeois contract with a depraved cultist to sample some real debauchery but choke at the last minute. The horror they unwittingly unleash tears their families to shreds, as their teenage children become thralls of Dracula! In a compelling twist, the infamous Count is more a perverse spirit of malice working through the young people against their elders rather than an active force in his own right. The story really captures the anger of kids about their parents’ hypocrisy, something that may resonate with young people again today. Just remember, your parents felt the same way in their day. I give this film extra points for its colorful cathouse scenes and the put-upon, camp major domo who runs the place..



Taste the Blood of Dracula sounds amazing and full of subtext.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2018/12/07 08:32:39


Post by: Manchu


It’s certainly not what I’d call a subtle picture but at least it has a point of view.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2018/12/07 21:10:24


Post by: Easy E


Beowulf- This was the Mocap one from Robert Zemeckis. There are times where it looks amazing, and other times..... not so much. Female faces and eyes are a particular issue. However, the writing and story are pretty cracking.

The commentary Robert Zemeckis comes off a bit as an idiot who hated the source material. Thankfully, he wasn't he writer as they loved it (Neil Gaiman and some other bloke).

Really cool seeing a bit about how they did it. Shooting barely took any time, but the savings were eaten up by the cost of the technology behind the MoCap. Fascinating.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2018/12/07 23:01:48


Post by: Vulcan


I just watched Superman vs. Batman.

The movie works much better if you assume it's a wannabe dressing up like Batman rather than actually being Batman.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2018/12/08 00:06:48


Post by: Lance845


Batman is the best part of that movie even though he kills a lot.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2018/12/08 23:52:23


Post by: Vulcan


Which is why the movie is better if you pretend it's not Bruce Wayne in the Batsuit.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2018/12/09 02:38:29


Post by: Azreal13


 Yodhrin wrote:
Saw Venom the other day. Was it necessary? No. Do I like what it signifies re Sony/Marvel/Spiderman rights? No. Was it good? Eh, it was pretty alright actually. Big, dumb, with a villain who you keep asking "how the feth does everyone around this guy not realise he's a total loon?!", but it actually ended up being quite funny in parts and the action is decent. Worth a watch if you're in the mood to switch off a little and just snigger at the Venom/Brock internal banter.


In a nutshell - it would be much better if it was just about a man who catches an alien parasite and made no reference to anything Marvel.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2018/12/10 10:35:16


Post by: Turnip Jedi


Ralph Breaks the Internet

Sort of lazy follow up, few funny bits and silly sight gags, Bee Minus


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2018/12/10 10:45:09


Post by: Excommunicatus


Bad Santa.

Greatest Christmas movie ever made.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2018/12/10 14:52:42


Post by: LunarSol


 Turnip Jedi wrote:
Ralph Breaks the Internet

Sort of lazy follow up, few funny bits and silly sight gags, Bee Minus


Saw this yesterday. It's like a better version of the Emoji movie that seems to vaguely understand how computers work. Worth watching for the Princess bits.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2018/12/10 18:24:55


Post by: Easy E


Count Dracula and His Vampire Brides- I am not sure what purpose the Vampire Brides have in the movie, but it does make a more interesting title than Count Dracula: Blofeld Wannabe. This movie is a fun mash-up of the occult, espionage, and the Doctor and his Companions. This movie really wanted to be as cool as a Roger Moore Bond mixed with a Tom Baker Dr. Who episode. Sadly, not as good as it should be, but still good B-shlock.

Fangs of the Walking Dead- What an awesome title. Too bad the movie isn't awesome. It is all sizzle an dno steak, meaning it tries to make you think smutty thinks are happening but wimps out and nothing really happens. Plus, it wimps out at the last moment and tries to say, "No, not REAL Vampire.... it is all a gaslighting" but then they have an elaborate Vampire death scene for the guy that isn't a vampire. I am thinking the translation lost the rails on this one. What a waste of an awesome title.... but it is very riffable.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2018/12/10 18:52:15


Post by: greatbigtree


2001: A Space Odyssey

Stanley Kubrick shows model spaceships while making “whoo-oooo-oooo” sounds at ear splitting volume (compared to speech). Random nonsense is interrupted by wooden planks (actors) describing space-mumbo-jumbo to each other. An infallible computer makes a mistake, and tries to kill the crew to cover it up. (?) Captain 2-by-6 sneaks back in through a door not controlled by the infallible computer. He kills the computer by pulling out the memory, resulting in a derpy rendition of a classic folk tune. Rather than abbandoning the mission, 2-by-6 arrives, finds the source of space magic, is teleported through space/time and is shown growing old and dying.

But wait! Space baby was behind it the whole time!

Review: If I wasn’t stuck in an airplane seat, I never would have finished without fast-forwarding through the boring parts, which should condense a future viewing to 25 mins, tops. If Kubrick is still alive, and you have the opportunity, please slap his face as hard as you can. While a cultural touch-stone, watching the film is a genuine pilgrimage filled with high expectations, long waits, much boredom, and no seeming purpose for the journey upon its completion.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2018/12/10 20:34:09


Post by: Easy E


Dementia 13

I forgot about this one. It was one of Coppola's first films by legendary producer Roger Corman who everyone knows from his cameo on Beverly Hills: 90210! Right! Everyone!

Anyway, the movie is like a mix of a standard gothic gaslighter and an Axe Murder film..... yes it goes together about that smoothly. Again, Scooby Doo level Whodunnit occurs, and then the sleazy, creepy, vaguely effete Doctor is our hero!?!

The best part is when a gold-digger is unravelling her nefarious plan, but runs into an unexpected complication while swimming......

Watchable.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2018/12/10 20:37:20


Post by: redux


Jazzed on Boylan's series for Helsreach.




Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2018/12/10 23:46:21


Post by: Vulcan


 greatbigtree wrote:
2001: A Space Odyssey

Stanley Kubrick shows model spaceships while making “whoo-oooo-oooo” sounds at ear splitting volume (compared to speech). Random nonsense is interrupted by wooden planks (actors) describing space-mumbo-jumbo to each other. An infallible computer makes a mistake, and tries to kill the crew to cover it up. (?) Captain 2-by-6 sneaks back in through a door not controlled by the infallible computer. He kills the computer by pulling out the memory, resulting in a derpy rendition of a classic folk tune. Rather than abbandoning the mission, 2-by-6 arrives, finds the source of space magic, is teleported through space/time and is shown growing old and dying.

But wait! Space baby was behind it the whole time!

Review: If I wasn’t stuck in an airplane seat, I never would have finished without fast-forwarding through the boring parts, which should condense a future viewing to 25 mins, tops. If Kubrick is still alive, and you have the opportunity, please slap his face as hard as you can. While a cultural touch-stone, watching the film is a genuine pilgrimage filled with high expectations, long waits, much boredom, and no seeming purpose for the journey upon its completion.


I guess you had to be there....


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2018/12/11 01:43:02


Post by: greatbigtree


I had not realized it's a 50 year old film now! I was born 13 years after it was made, and just saw it this past week.

It's in desperate need of a recut. There is so much filler in there. For anyone interested, the IMDB has a few trailers, both old and new, and it really is one of those movies where all the best parts are in the trailer. Perhaps in it's time, but today it just feels like a director that couldn't cut what needed to be cut.

@ the OP: This was fun, I'm going to have to try and remember what the last movie I saw before 2001 was.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2018/12/11 16:45:40


Post by: Easy E


 greatbigtree wrote:
I had not realized it's a 50 year old film now! I was born 13 years after it was made, and just saw it this past week.

It's in desperate need of a recut. There is so much filler in there. For anyone interested, the IMDB has a few trailers, both old and new, and it really is one of those movies where all the best parts are in the trailer. Perhaps in it's time, but today it just feels like a director that couldn't cut what needed to be cut.

@ the OP: This was fun, I'm going to have to try and remember what the last movie I saw before 2001 was.


Pacing 50 years ago was very different than pacing today......

This was violently driven home to me when I was watching the commentary on From Russia With Love and Goldfinger. They were talking about how the editor at the time was so revolutionary because he used more quick cuts and other editorial techniques to ramp up the pacing. I love both those movies, but compared to modern movies..... the pacing is slow, slow, slow.

Audiences had very different expectations back then.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2018/12/11 17:24:43


Post by: Manchu


Easy E, you must be surfing the Amazon Prime Horror channel as well.

I mostly enjoyed Dementia 13 keeping in mind it was a rip off of Psycho. Must wholeheartedly agree that the gold digger character was my favorite and I had hoped she would be the main protagonist.

Onward! This time, two adaptations of Le Fanu’s Carmilla:

Crypt of the Vampire (1963) - I consider this picture a diamond in the rough, leaving aside Jose Campos’s wooden performance as the young scholar. Christopher Lee is suitably ominous as the lord of a sinister castle but the real danger lies among a trio of beautiful women, one of whom is the vampiric reincarnation of a vengeful witch! But which one? Charming performances from all the ladies and the gypsy rag and bone man.

The Vampire Lovers (1970) - Titillation turns to frustration in this picture, alternately saved and spoiled by Ingrid Pitt’s overwhelming performance. Beautiful sets, lush costumes, and of course sexy ladies ... but a plot that just won’t really get going, despite mostly happening between just a couple of people within the confines of a smallish mansion. Bookending the story with Peter Cushing cameos just made me realize how disappointing the main action really was. All the same, a must watch for anyone interested in Hammer Horror.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2018/12/11 20:04:34


Post by: War Drone


Today I watched something called Assassination Nation ... And I'm honestly not sure what I'm supposed to take from it ... I "think" I get it, but it's kind of tenuous ... and tbh ... I couldn't relate to a single person in the movie ... perhaps 1x ... tentatively ... (but I had that same thing with Phantom Thread ... it was just so far outside my personal frame of reference ...).

I think that might be a good thing in this case ... but it's also possible I'm trying too hard to like it because it's edgy?

Anyway ... I subsequently started watching Logan (billionth time?) and I'm now happy (so WTF AM I CRYING !?!?!?


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2018/12/12 02:34:05


Post by: ZergSmasher


As of a couple of weeks ago, my brother and I decided to watch the movie Street Fighter (made in 1994 I believe). It's one of the first attempts at a movie adaptation of a video game, and it is just as terrible, if not worse, than you are already probably thinking it is. That said, it is, at least for my brother and me, firmly in the "so bad it's good" category. It's fun to watch and laugh about how stupid it is, and just enjoy catching the many references to the source material (Street Fighter II video game).


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2018/12/12 15:57:23


Post by: Easy E


Is that the one with JCVD and Raul Julia.

Best line is paraphrased as, "For you, that was the day I killed your father. It defined who you were and the rest of your life. From then on you dedicated your life to defeating me. For me, it was a Tuesday."


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2018/12/12 16:59:09


Post by: Turnip Jedi


 Easy E wrote:
Is that the one with JCVD and Raul Julia.

Best line is paraphrased as, "For you, that was the day I killed your father. It defined who you were and the rest of your life. From then on you dedicated your life to defeating me. For me, it was a Tuesday."


I liked the fact he appeared to be the only cast member aware of the turkey he'd signed onto and up'd the not giving two forks and hamming to levels previously unseen


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2018/12/12 17:16:37


Post by: BobtheInquisitor


 ZergSmasher wrote:
As of a couple of weeks ago, my brother and I decided to watch the movie Street Fighter (made in 1994 I believe). It's one of the first attempts at a movie adaptation of a video game, and it is just as terrible, if not worse, than you are already probably thinking it is. That said, it is, at least for my brother and me, firmly in the "so bad it's good" category. It's fun to watch and laugh about how stupid it is, and just enjoy catching the many references to the source material (Street Fighter II video game).


It was worth it for Raul Julia's Tuesday line. All worth it.

I wonder if Mortal Kombat still holds up as the best movie adaptation of a video game. And if you want a so bad it's good video game movie, it's hard to top Super Mario Brothers. "Trust the fungus."


Automatically Appended Next Post:
 Easy E wrote:
Is that the one with JCVD and Raul Julia.

Best line is paraphrased as, "For you, that was the day I killed your father. It defined who you were and the rest of your life. From then on you dedicated your life to defeating me. For me, it was a Tuesday."


For clarity's sake:





Automatically Appended Next Post:
Here are some mini reviews from me:

Krull: Who needs the most awesome weapon in fantasy when love is a flamethrower?

Clue: This board game based comedy will have you laughing so hard you'll feel
Spoiler:
...flames...on the side of your face. Heaving, breathless...flames.


Upgrade: It's the kind of low budget, dark, buddy action comedy they don't make any more...except that they did.



Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2018/12/12 17:28:27


Post by: Gitdakka


Mandy- a recent Nic Cage movie. Cool visuals and promising opening. Lack of any story or cohesiveness ruined it. Why did they throw in a character to explain everything mid movie when nothing made sense anyway? It's very similiar to "Hobo with a shotgun" so much it's almost a ripoff, but without the humor.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2018/12/12 17:33:21


Post by: LunarSol


 Turnip Jedi wrote:
 Easy E wrote:
Is that the one with JCVD and Raul Julia.

Best line is paraphrased as, "For you, that was the day I killed your father. It defined who you were and the rest of your life. From then on you dedicated your life to defeating me. For me, it was a Tuesday."


I liked the fact he appeared to be the only cast member aware of the turkey he'd signed onto and up'd the not giving two forks and hamming to levels previously unseen


Given he was dying and mostly did the movie for his kids.... probably?

There's a few decent videogame adaptations. Silent Hill wasn't awful. At least as not awful as Mortal Kombat. I hear Rampage is probably the legitimate heir to the crown currently, but we also live in an age where the novelty of a videogame movie is gone and people are less accepting of Mortal Kombat's level of "good".

SMB is true terrible though. It's actually hard to comprehend the decisions that lead to the film, though its not too far removed from comic adaptations of the era.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2018/12/12 17:43:19


Post by: BobtheInquisitor


I think what elevated Mortal Kombat above Street Fighter was that everyone involved knew what kind of movie they were making. Everything lined up from the sets to the choreography to the acting. As good as Raul Julia was at hamming it up, he was no Cary-Hiroyuki Tagawa. Don't even get me started on Christopher Lambert vs Jean-Claude Van Damme. MK leaned into its game's goofy lore while SF tried to distance itself (just as SMB did) and ended up in a worse place.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2018/12/12 17:58:23


Post by: LunarSol


 BobtheInquisitor wrote:
MK leaned into its game's goofy lore while SF tried to distance itself (just as SMB did) and ended up in a worse place.


I've mostly heard this in regard to comic adaptations, but one way to describe it that I really like is "ashamed of the source material".


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2018/12/12 18:13:37


Post by: LordofHats


 BobtheInquisitor wrote:
I think what elevated Mortal Kombat above Street Fighter was that everyone involved knew what kind of movie they were making. Everything lined up from the sets to the choreography to the acting. As good as Raul Julia was at hamming it up, he was no Cary-Hiroyuki Tagawa. Don't even get me started on Christopher Lambert vs Jean-Claude Van Damme. MK leaned into its game's goofy lore while SF tried to distance itself (just as SMB did) and ended up in a worse place.


I view both films as campy nonsense that only a fan of the respective series would enjoy.

While I'm here, I finally saw The Predator now that it's out on DVD, and the Nun.

The Nun: God this was cliche. One of the nice things about the Conjuring films is that even when they're not very good you can feel the enthusiasm with which it was made and just go along with it. The Nun had none of that. It wasn't awful per se, but it was definitely lazy through and through. And I really just can't be bothered to think much more of it than that. Cliche'd and lazy. Five hats out of ten.

The Predator: The only parts of this movie that were good were the action parts. Those parts were great. So great I wonder if one team made them, and then a completely different, far less interested in the actual premise, team made the rest of it. I swear it's like someone just took the cheesy parts of Independence Day (while making them more eye rolling rather than endearing), the kid with advanced technology parts of Kin (why?), and decided they'd rather be working on either of those movies than a Predator film. Sure enough the whole "they're evolving with what they hunt" plot point was stupid as balls. EDIT: Oh and the characters didn't have any. Really the only high point is that the action worked pretty damn well, in spite of the completely discombobulated plot. Six hats out of ten.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2018/12/12 18:15:51


Post by: BobtheInquisitor


Sure, but for fans of campy nonsense there is a huge difference in quality.

Speaking of which, I always enjoyed the Mark Decascus vehicle Drive. It's got action. It's got sass. It's got a cyborg who kills someone with a quarter.




Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2018/12/12 18:18:05


Post by: LordofHats


 BobtheInquisitor wrote:
Sure, but for fans of campy nonsense there is a huge difference in quality.


That's fair.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2018/12/12 18:24:16


Post by: BobtheInquisitor


I heard what I think is a spoiler about The Predator, but I want to know if this is true or if my friend is messing with me.

Spoiler:
Is the Predator's ultimate hunt really a kid with autism?


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2018/12/12 18:32:17


Post by: LordofHats


 BobtheInquisitor wrote:
I heard what I think is a spoiler about The Predator, but I want to know if this is true or if my friend is messing with me.

Spoiler:
Is the Predator's ultimate hunt really a kid with autism?


Spoiler:
Ultimate hunt no, but one Predator decides that autism is apparently a vital evolutionary trait that he totally wants before global warming kills off our species and tries to kidnap an autistic kid, i.e. this entire plot was balls to the damn walls pants on bat gak covered head stupid. Only watch this movie if you A) don't care about wasting brain cells on it and B) really like the Predator/Action films with dumb plots.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2018/12/12 19:45:28


Post by: War Drone


Spoiler:
 LordofHats wrote:
 BobtheInquisitor wrote:
I heard what I think is a spoiler about The Predator, but I want to know if this is true or if my friend is messing with me.

[spoiler] Is the Predator's ultimate hunt really a kid with autism?


Spoiler:
Ultimate hunt no, but one Predator decides that autism is apparently a vital evolutionary trait that he totally wants before global warming kills off our species and tries to kidnap an autistic kid, i.e. this entire plot was balls to the damn walls pants on bat gak covered head stupid. Only watch this movie if you A) don't care about wasting brain cells on it and B) really like the Predator/Action films with dumb plots.
[/spoiler]

Huh ... I'm not sure ... of anything anymore


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2018/12/13 08:17:56


Post by: Manchu


Good insight into Super Mario Bros there, Bob.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2018/12/13 19:45:00


Post by: Easy E


Mortal Kombat also had a great soundtrack!


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2018/12/14 11:17:37


Post by: AndrewGPaul


 BobtheInquisitor wrote:
And if you want a so bad it's good video game movie, it's hard to top Super Mario Brothers. "Trust the fungus."]


When Bob Hoskin's son asked why he'd taken the role, Bob replied "to keep you in shoes". The reply? "I don't need shoes that badly"


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2018/12/14 13:59:41


Post by: Easy E


The Pyx- This movie was a hard-boiled detective movie that dabbled in Satanic Cults. It was set in Quebec, and there was large swathes of dialogue in French-Canadian with no subtitles. They often switched from French to English inbetween and during scenes. However, the main cop was Christopher Plummer and the star actress was Karen Black.... so at least the movie was handled by quality performers.

It was kind of slow moving, dull, and had an annoying folk music soundtrack. Worse, the big pay-off wasn't even that big of a pay-off. This maybe because it was a Canadian film.....


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2018/12/14 15:56:17


Post by: BobtheInquisitor


 AndrewGPaul wrote:
 BobtheInquisitor wrote:
And if you want a so bad it's good video game movie, it's hard to top Super Mario Brothers. "Trust the fungus."]


When Bob Hoskin's son asked why he'd taken the role, Bob replied "to keep you in shoes". The reply? "I don't need shoes that badly"


I'm getting sick of all this job shaming. Besides, it's not like he was Michael Caine taking a role in Jaws 4.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2018/12/17 16:47:15


Post by: Easy E


Yeah, as an actor you never know where the next paycheck is, so sometimes you take drek because they are paying you. One moment you can be top of the heap, and the next you are back to nobody. Therefore, you take what is offered.

I think Sam L. Jackson speaks pretty openly about this.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2018/12/17 17:01:32


Post by: Turnip Jedi


I think Caine's quote "First of all, I choose the great roles, and if none of these come, I choose the mediocre ones, and if they don't come, I choose the ones that pay the rent." covers it and he has taken a fair few of the latter

Also watched Die Hard at the cinema yesterday

A fittingly high point for the 80's action movie genre to end on, before Willis' ego ruined him


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2018/12/17 17:06:20


Post by: Yodhrin


I mean, it probably also helps to not live a stereotypical celeb lifestyle, most people even in expensive cities could live comfortably for a lifetime on one paycheque for a big name actor, even a couple of years as a middling second fiddle/character actor type is hardly chump change.

I get the idea of taking what you're given when you're a jobbing youngster trying to make your name getting "Bloated River Corpse" and "Angry Person In Queue #3" type roles, but I really struggle to believe that Sam L. Jackson is living paycheque to paycheque these days.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2018/12/17 18:20:44


Post by: BobtheInquisitor


There's a lot of hazard in sitting idle, though. Some people are fine not going out and working, but many seem to suffer some kind of psychological issues when they are not doing some kind of job, regardless of whether they need the money. So, actors will go out and act, even if they don't need the money, even if the film is schlock. Yeah, I wish I had that problem, but that doesn't mean it's not real.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2018/12/17 21:30:39


Post by: Easy E


 Yodhrin wrote:
I mean, it probably also helps to not live a stereotypical celeb lifestyle, most people even in expensive cities could live comfortably for a lifetime on one paycheque for a big name actor, even a couple of years as a middling second fiddle/character actor type is hardly chump change.

I get the idea of taking what you're given when you're a jobbing youngster trying to make your name getting "Bloated River Corpse" and "Angry Person In Queue #3" type roles, but I really struggle to believe that Sam L. Jackson is living paycheque to paycheque these days.


Well, Mr. Jackson's point is that one day you are getting offered roles left and right, and the next day no one is calling you. The acting business is very uncertain, so take the business while they are still calling you seems to be his motto.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2018/12/18 14:53:23


Post by: LunarSol


 Easy E wrote:
 Yodhrin wrote:
I mean, it probably also helps to not live a stereotypical celeb lifestyle, most people even in expensive cities could live comfortably for a lifetime on one paycheque for a big name actor, even a couple of years as a middling second fiddle/character actor type is hardly chump change.

I get the idea of taking what you're given when you're a jobbing youngster trying to make your name getting "Bloated River Corpse" and "Angry Person In Queue #3" type roles, but I really struggle to believe that Sam L. Jackson is living paycheque to paycheque these days.


Well, Mr. Jackson's point is that one day you are getting offered roles left and right, and the next day no one is calling you. The acting business is very uncertain, so take the business while they are still calling you seems to be his motto.


A lot of the reason shows go on for several seasons past their prime is simply because ending it means all those people have to find a new job.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2018/12/18 15:57:35


Post by: Easy E


Okay, let's get back to some reviews.....

Blood Tide- Another great title with a mediocre movie. I mean, the script for this one isn't bad. I could see someone able to pull it off really well.... I expected a total turkey but it was better than that. However, it does have long bits where you are waiting for something to happen. Again, lot's of sizzle but no steak.

James Earl Jones is good as a greedy, skeevy diver whole likes to spout Shakespeare all the time. Jose Ferrer is good as the greek headman. The rest..... could use some work....


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/02/13 00:40:37


Post by: Easy E


Been a bit since I have watched a movie, but I decided to go with a double feature of Over-the-top ridiculousness.

1. Ninja Assassin- Whatever happened to Rain and the attempt by the Wachowski's to make him a thing in the US. He had been a korean pop-star but was trying to make the leap. He was in this and Speed Racer as Taijo Togokhan.

Anyway, if you have seen any Ninja movies you know the basic story to this one. The two things that interested my most were:

1. Naomi Harris is in this!
2. Rain mostly uses that cool weapon that is a blade on a chain. So nice to get away from the tyranny of Katana in such movies.

There is much fighting and bloodshed of the CGI variety.

2. Scott Pilgrim vs. The World- I really enjoyed this one. It was the most 'actin" I have seen Michael Cera ever do in a film! I would watch it again, and possibly even buy it..... I enjoyed it that much.

It is a quirky mix of Juno, Jay and Silent Bob, and the Way of the Warrior..... plus some other fun stuff. Brandon Routh and Chris Evans are great additions to this film. Brandon Routh used to be something.... and now he is Legends of Frikkin' Tomorrow! Wow!

Anyway.... go watch it.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/02/13 02:26:15


Post by: Lance845


Ninja Assassin is great. My favorite ninja movie. The sheer volume of ninja stars is amazing.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/02/13 15:33:23


Post by: LunarSol


I LOVE Scott Pilgrim but I really wish they would have waited for the comic to wrap up rather than go with their own end. It's not terrible, but misses a few insightful character beats I'd have love to have seen brought to life in the film.

On a similar note, I finally got around to watching Ready Player One last night. I kind of despised the book to a degree but really enjoyed the movie. There are bits of what I didn't like about the book that still seep through, there's a little too much boilerplate Hollywood in the ending, and its clear Spielberg geeks out over movies more than games (duh) but I enjoyed it enough to really wish I had caught it in theaters.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/02/13 17:51:30


Post by: Easy E


 Lance845 wrote:
Ninja Assassin is great. My favorite ninja movie. The sheer volume of ninja stars is amazing.


Right, they throw Ninja Stars as fast as guys with guns can shoot bullets!

I am still a sucker for the original American Ninja film.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/02/13 18:32:42


Post by: Excommunicatus


Withnail & I - they went on holiday by mistake.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/02/13 18:33:20


Post by: Alpharius


Any love for Gymkata too then?


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/02/13 20:12:50


Post by: Ahtman


Just watched the Dirty Dozen again. While it generally holds up as a piece of entertainment there are still some issues that really stand out. The crazed religious bigot and racist Maggot would never be allowed on a team, even one like this, and it hurts the movie a bit as he is so blatantly unstable and crazy that it just comes across as more narrative necessity to keep him around than him being necessary for the group. There is also a lot of accurate hip firing with inaccurate weapons through cover. Sniper shooting through a window? Hip fire a grease gun from the ground a building over and you'll be fine.

Also watched Once Upon a Time In America and honestly didn't find it all that great. The cinematography and composition is quite beautiful but the story is inconsistent. The sexual politics is especially out of place even for the time (filming or with the diegesis of the film) and doesn't seem natural. If you like Sergio Leone it is worth a watch but make sure it is the full version, which is nearly four hours, and not the butchered US theatrical release which is not even two hours.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/02/13 20:18:54


Post by: Lance845


I watched IO on netflix recently. The ending was a little off but not bad. The girl plays her part really well and Anthony Mackie might be a better actor then anyone gives him credit for so far. Not that hes been bad in any of it btw. Just that hes better then you would think.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/02/13 20:35:21


Post by: Just Tony


 Easy E wrote:
2. Scott Pilgrim vs. The World


I will rewatch it solely because Alison Pill is in it.




Quick reviews? Let me try...


Avatar - Boy falls in love, turns blue in the end.



Titanic - Boy falls in love, turns blue in the end.




Kubo and the Two Strings - This is a fantastic story. Not so dark to scare off my children, but deep enough to challenge everyone in the room.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/02/13 20:46:00


Post by: LunarSol


Kubo is fantastic. Beautiful, really engaging film.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/02/14 02:42:10


Post by: BobtheInquisitor


We only made it halfway through Kubo because it did, in fact, scare the child. Hope to finish it someday.


Flight of Dragons- Gary Gygax-alike turns into dragon, shouts science.

The Dark Crystal- puppets are kinda creepy on purpose in this one.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/02/14 18:47:49


Post by: Easy E


 Alpharius wrote:
Any love for Gymkata too then?




Does Mary Lou Retton stick a perfect 10 vault in the Olympics? Of course I love Gymkata.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/02/14 19:00:50


Post by: BobtheInquisitor


It's a little known fact that every old world village has a pommel horse in the town square.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/02/15 15:35:39


Post by: LunarSol


Watched Justice League last night. I hadn't missed anything. Not awful, not anything really memorable either. Just kinda is.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/02/15 15:40:18


Post by: Easy E


 LunarSol wrote:
Watched Justice League last night. I hadn't missed anything. Not awful, not anything really memorable either. Just kinda is.


The Batman and Wonder Woman interactions were pretty good.

Too bad they all centered around how much they needed Superman or not. Really hammered home the DC Superman problem to me.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/02/15 16:06:07


Post by: LunarSol


Batfleck's speech to Alfred about why Superman is better than him ALMOST gets it. In terms of pure dialog it really does get it, but then the movie doesn't do anything with it. That's sort of the issue with the film as a whole (and DC's films as a whole, even Aquaman suffers from it); even when they "get" their characters, the story doesn't actually show these character traits the characters talk about.

Btw, its totally intentional that when Joss Whedon's name appears in the opening credits its above the hobo with the "I Tried" sign, right?


Automatically Appended Next Post:
Also saw Lego Movie 2. Kind of reminds me of Guardians 2: a movie that’s probably better than its predecessor in a lot of ways but doesn’t have the same surprise factor or straightforward villains. Did a good job packing surprises without having the first movies big rug pull available.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/03/07 18:44:56


Post by: alexa88


Layer Cake
again...
I love this film so much 9/10


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/03/14 14:10:02


Post by: Easy E


Watched Isn't It Romantic with Rebel Wilson.

Deeply stupid.... but if you accept that when you walk in; it can be fun and amusing.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/03/15 05:35:15


Post by: BobtheInquisitor


Just saw The Last Dragon for the first time (as an adult), and it was way better than I expected. It's a Motown Martial Arts action-comedy with an iconic villain.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/03/15 15:57:36


Post by: Easy E


My family and I started MST3K: The Gauntlet. 1 film a night and we are two nights in.

1. Mac and Me- ET rip-off with corporate sponsors. Some quality riffing and the mid-scene bits are top notch. I love that Jonah wants to explain the end of the last season, but no one else cares.

2. Atlantic Rim- This is an Asylum film with all the hallmarks of their work. There are some good riffs, but even with Jonah and the Bots this movie was a huge slog. They can only do so much, but they put in a Herculean effort to make this watchable. Sadly, they fail.

This season is aptly named. It really has been a Gauntlet so far.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/03/16 06:21:37


Post by: Elbows


Triple Frontier (Netflix)

Started off good, but meanders and becomes pretty damn bleak.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/03/19 17:27:01


Post by: Easy E


MST3K- The Guantlet

3. Lord of the Deep- Perhaps the best pre-credits scene of the season so far. The rifss start strong, dip a bit, and then rise back to the challenge. The Movie itself is also pretty goofy as a "Alien, but Underwater!" Rip-off. Despite their claims to the cheapness of the film, it is 100 times better than Atlantic Rim in all respects!


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/03/20 13:34:57


Post by: Easy E


MST-3K- The Guantlet

4. The Day Time Ended- What the hell did I just watch? This movie killed time and space for me as the clock claims it was only 80 minutes or so, but it felt like I aged 5 years watching it. The riffing was also lost in time and not there best work. However, there was a catchy song and dance number number in the cut scene.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/03/25 18:54:54


Post by: Easy E


Terry Pratchett's Colour of Magic

Not funny enough.

I have a feeling it works better in print than on film. Death is good fun, and the take on being a magic sword is funny, and the whole wizard's offing each other is a fine premise.

The rest.... I'm not so sure.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/03/25 19:02:05


Post by: Dark Apostle 666


I think a lot of the comedy in Pratchett comes from the author's narration (If that's the right term), which doesn't particularly translate into dialogue, perhaps?


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/03/25 19:25:16


Post by: Frazzled


The Favorite
Absolutely excellent performances and writing. Amazing movie considering most of its takes place in about three rooms and could have been the set of a play.

This is what happens when you get two Oscar winners and then the third major player puts in a performance that gets her, her Oscar.

Wife, Daughter and I loved it. Bravo.



Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/04/07 19:00:37


Post by: LordofHats


I watched Bumblebee out of the RedBox at the Wal-Mart.

I figured each new Transformers film had to stop being worse than the last one eventually, cause seriously how far down could that barrel really go, but I have to say this movie was really impressive. Maybe it's just that pretty much every other film since the first one kept being worse and worse but Bumblebee is a solid movie. The boring old "humans stupidly believe whatever the Decepticons say" was "ugh" though.

I especially enjoyed the use of near-G1 designs for many of the transformers.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/04/07 20:19:57


Post by: hotsauceman1


Evolution
Its a fun movie starring a lot of Actors you would likely recognize. its earlt 2001 so CGI isnt great but thats fine.
I really REALLY miss early 2000s comedys. I dont know what changed, but these comedies are different from comedies today.
It seems like comedies today are just gross out, but these are not and derive their comedy from a lot of the situation.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/04/07 20:45:50


Post by: BobtheInquisitor


That was the film with Orlando Jones, right? Whatever happened to him?


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/04/07 21:22:29


Post by: hotsauceman1


He is on American Gods so there is that.
He has alot of Bit roles, he is a working actor, which I respect.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/04/08 13:49:20


Post by: LunarSol


Finally got around to watching Solo. It's fine, but not particularly engaging. Fan servicey in a bad way in parts, fun and forgettable in others. Disney's deaging tech worked a lot better on Billy Dee Williams than Harrison Ford this time around.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/04/08 14:51:08


Post by: Frazzled


 BobtheInquisitor wrote:
Just saw The Last Dragon for the first time (as an adult), and it was way better than I expected. It's a Motown Martial Arts action-comedy with an iconic villain.


Thats a fun film with about a thousand quotable lines. Sucker please!


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/04/08 19:20:40


Post by: Easy E


MST3k- The Gauntlet- Killer Fish

A heist movie with piranhas added.... for some reason..... Lee Majors allows for some great 6 Million Dollar Man jokes. They also let Growler do a lot of stuff.

Otherwise, pretty forgettable episode.





Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/04/08 19:23:23


Post by: Mad Doc Grotsnik


Man, I can never sit through MST3K. I mean, I love cheesy movies, but the sarky comments should be my own!


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/04/09 02:42:57


Post by: Yodhrin


Saw Captain Marvel, it was pretty good, solid second-tier MCU movie only let down by the occasionally juvenile attempts at humour(there was plenty of humour that was not juvenile, and reasonably good).


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/07/30 15:05:31


Post by: Easy E


My family has been away, so I have watched a ton of movies..... I can't even recall them all....

Ip Man 3
Surprisingly, IP Man faces something he can not defeat and it is surprisingly powerful installment. All the Kung-Fu is just tacked on to the real story... about a Man and his Wife going through a difficult time.

Also, a fun fight in an elevator. That is always a plus.

Ninja
This is some movie with Scott Adkin as a white guy in a Ninja school. Have you seen a Ninja film before? Then you know the general plot of this one with a white guy in a Ninja school. The villain is surprisingly fun and I can't say I hate this film. However, it really did enjoy beating up on the female lead, which made me feel a bit uneasy.

Close A Female bodyguard is assigned to protect an heiress during a high stakes business deal. The heiress and bodyguard are well drawn characters, and this is more about tension and drama then action. That said, it delivers the action. The twist is kind of obvious, but I have seen way too many thrillers so there you go. I enjoyed it.

Message from the King Chadwick Bosman comes to LA to find out what happened to his sister. Bad things Chadwick.... bad things. Again, I have seen enough political pot boilers to know how this will play out, but I love a good "You messed with the wrong person" type of movie. Bike chains are brutal.

Polar Mads Mikkelson (sp) tries out to be John Wick and is surprisingly successful. I love me some Mads in a movie and he delivers. A slightly more serious version of Shoot-out with Clive Owen, but only slightly. It has a Hallway fight scene similar to Old Boy but with guns.

..... I am sure there will be more when I think about it.....


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/07/30 15:11:44


Post by: Frazzled


Once Upon a Time in Hollywood.

I am a QT fan, but this was not a good movie.
-It meanders for 95% of it. The last five minutes is almost not related to the rest of the movie.

-Unless you are part of the film indutsry, the meandering gets boring after about twenty minutes.

-It's vaguely related to the Tate murders. Except its a high school fantasy and completely not related.

-It has none of the weird interesting conversations QT movies are known for.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/07/30 15:43:34


Post by: Mad Doc Grotsnik


He-Man goes mental in Vietnam, and is killed by Timecop.

They both come back as sort of techno zombies. He-Man goes mental again.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/07/30 20:54:36


Post by: Easy E


 Mad Doc Grotsnik wrote:
He-Man goes mental in Vietnam, and is killed by Timecop.

They both come back as sort of techno zombies. He-Man goes mental again.


Universal Soldier?


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/07/31 14:48:36


Post by: Easy E


Fire and Ice

The Ralph Bakshi animated movie about primitive ice age warrior tribes.... but filled with magic..... I guess sort of like the Hyborian Age or something. The animation isn't half bad but..... man this movie is kind of hard to watch with modern eyes for a lot of reasons. The story is a bit flimsy, the pacing is odd, and the character designs are..... off-putting. There is a guy in a wolf-mask who feels like the proto-type of the modern Batman. I couldn't stop thinking Batman whenever I saw him.



I really can't recommend this as anything more than a novelty watch, but it could be fun in the background of a house party on huge screens.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/08/02 15:56:08


Post by: Easy E


This is the End

An end of the world, road flick with a famous actor!

You get what you expect out of the film. It is not terrible, but it is not great either.

The Lords of Salem

The Rob Zombie directed horror movie that no one really talks about. There is a reason. Well shot and constructed at some points, but almost more of a music video style in others. Also a vehicle to show us all that his wife is fit, even though she is a bit older now.

Mostly just kind of slow and plodding and reminded me of a bad John Carpenter knock-off film, especially the score.



Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/08/02 17:17:11


Post by: greatbigtree


Alien vs Predator:

Really, the title is the review. Do you like these two franchises? Yes. Do you *really* care about the plot that puts them together? No. Will you have fun watching iconic members of both Xenos kill each other? Yes.

Summary: A contrivance brings otherwise intelligent people to take stupid risks. Unsurprisingly, a bunch of people get traumatic chest rearrangements. Aliens kill a bunch of characters, until we have two survivors. Final battle with the big-bad, one survivor makes it out alive... to freeze / starve to death right quick.

Analysis: Play stupid games, win stupid prizes. We have satellites that detect heat signatures in the Antarctic, but don’t notice an alien space ship landing there? This movie is all about style over substance. A brief and briefly amusing what-if scenario spanning two movie series with a nostalgic nod here and there.

For my wife and I, the advertising materials focused on “AVP”, which happen to be my wife’s initials. One of the scientists’ character names, that gets all chest-burst, is Thomas Parks, and that’s my name. An amusing coincidence that leads us to rewatch this movie every couple of years. I can’t imagine why anyone else would rewatch it, though.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/08/05 13:47:21


Post by: Easy E


Highlander: The Source

Oh dear me.

Poor Adrian Paul..... he really must have been desperate for money to be in this thing. The direction was one level above music video. The ideas in the script..... were just bad and they should feel bad.

This. is. bad.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/08/12 14:41:43


Post by: Easy E


Once Upon a Time in Hollywood

This is QT's latest flick and as of this writing still in the movie theater. There maybe some spoilers ahead.

This is another one of QT's alt-history movies only this time the climax is the murders by the Manson Clan. It follows the fading star of a Hollywood cowboy actor as he slowly spirals down into episodic TV and Italian films, as he is accompanied by his buddy, handy man, chauffeur, and stunt double.

I am sure critics will eat this one up as they love movies abut Hollywood, but what does a non-critic think? I enjoyed it, but it is a slow burn that is a bit more of a character study than some of his other works. My favorite scenes involved Ray (Former star of Bounty Law) and a young girl child, method actor on set before a big scene. Great interaction and dialogue in thee scenes.

The movie also features great cars and is drenched in period flavor Media. For example, a bus with a billboard for Combat! on the side. Radio ads and music on the car stereos all the time. Billboards and signs everywhere. Good stuff and it helps set this film apart.

I am not a fan of the climax of the film. It is violent, but it is comically violent. It fits into the hallmarks of a QT movie, like women's dirty bare feet, bromance, pop culture references, and killing Nazis. Yes, this movie somehow manages to fit in a scene of killing Nazis..... another crowd pleaser.

Overall, I do not regret seeing this film but it could wait until DVD or Streaming. It is no Reservoir Dogs, Django, or Pulp Fiction. In some ways, it is a more restrained film.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/08/13 10:13:30


Post by: Sigur


That doesn't sound bad to me. My favourite QT film is Jackie Brown these days, because it handles its characters so lovingly. The other day I watched an interesting review about Once Upon a Time in Hollywood. Looking forward to seeing this one at some point. Streamed, on a tiny screen.


Speaking of tiny screens - two nights ago I couldn't sleep, so I idly browsed Netflix. New season of GLOW is up, which I'll watch asap, but not when I'm trying to sleep. Then I ran across something that made me loudly exclaim "They did what now?". Seems like Netflix did a Rocko's Modern Life special of roughly 45mins. Wow. I really like that show. And I felt like a tool for getting ...not quite excited, but interested in watching that special. Because there's a weird feeling about 'being got' by Netflix and being the target audience and all of that. I'm generally critical of Netflix productions, especially if they live off nostalgia.

Rocko's Modern Life - Static Cling (2019)

Rocko and his friend drift through space (which is how the series ended appearantly). First I checked if they got the original German voice cast back - they didn't. Whatever. Wouldn't know about the English one, because I only ever watched the show when it happened to be on TV back in the day (AS WE DID! ).
They find a way back to earth and find it to have changed a lot since they left 20 years ago. Now Rocko has to find his place in post-modern life.

It was mostly alright. I even laughed at one point. The show basically is all about being very self-aware. The last third or so gets rather predictable and even very deus ex machina -powered. They build in a big hurdle which I found wouldn't have been missed if it wasn't there, but they score a lot of 2019-points with it, so it's possibly another very self-aware move. Anyway, it's the typical contemporary verdict: "If you're a fan of the series this has enough to make you feel safe and cozy, but it also feels a bit shallow". You know, just like everything is nowadays.

Watch It if you like the original show.



Afterwards I was left awake and wanting for more, so I re-watched Sixteen Candles (1984).

One of the John Hughes classics. It covers pretty much one day in the life of Samantha (Molly Ringwald). Her 16th birthday. It's a pretty wacky comedy, also beset with a lot of sadness and frustration as well as dizzying highs.


It's been a while since I've been a teenager, but I think John Hughes just got what it's like being a teenager. The way the characters are portrayed between completely selfish and idiotic and having surprising moments in which they say clever and empathetic things (usually only when in one-on-one situations), especially so Anthony Michael Hall's character, who never even gets a name. He's the real star of the film, because he's the active element in the whole works.

Of course there are things to critisize about it. Of course the most prominent point being Long Duk Dong. When I told friends I'd watched the film again one of them asked "is that the one with the totally racist portrayal of the asian guy?". Yeah, well... yeah. He's never presented in a bad light though, which is nice, right? He's one of the stand-out positive characters, who has a whale of a time. Then there's the way Jake treats his GF towards the end, which is ...problematic to say the least. No chance in defending these points by today's standards.

Apart from that, I think it's an utterly enjoyable film. And SO many films after it quote this film in so many ways that I'd say it's one of the american films one should have seen at least once. And to be honest I find it utterly enjoyable.

Must-Watch. Along with Breakfast Club. The latter is even more important, but Sixteen Candles is also essential.



The Honeymooners (2005)


Wahey, now THIS feels like it's very high up there at the top of the heap of unnecessary remakes. I'm willing to bet that nobody who watches this one will know or have seen The Honeymooners. I certainly haven't. Most I know about that show is from that one episode of King of Queens.

That being said, the actors do a nice job. Of course it's not funny or clever. But if you're sitting in front of the TV and don't really have anything better to do or just read something and have the tv on on the side... or let me put it this way: Compared to what you expect when you read the concept of the film on paper it's pretty endearing. It's kinda like Burlesque (the Christina Aguilera one) in that way. About this one I expected to HATE it based on the concept and ingredients, but in the end I found it ...sufferable.

Don't Watch


Warhammer (1999)

It's a really cheap sci-fi film. The plot's not really worth mentioning. It's basically about a small group of soldiers who have to walk cross-country and get to the enemy to end the endless war. This way it's got a bit of Screamers (an enternally better film, with amazing ideas and better actors. Watch it.) vibe to it. But think Screamers without the Screamers, Peter Weller, the plot twists and the production value.

Now here's what the film has got going for it: The main parts are played by Superman and Jimmy Olsen. So if you're a die-hard fan of those two... it's probably still not worth it. If you sit through these extreme christian films which get only ever released in the US that Dean Cain pops up in nowadays just because you like Dean Cain so much and if you sit through what ever Jimmy does now you can also sit through Warhammer.

Don't Watch. Watch Screamers. That film rocks.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/08/13 13:57:43


Post by: Easy E


I love the old Black and White Honeymooners.....

That being said I have never seen the 2005 film. I am guessing it has John Goodman in it.

Indiana Jones and the....

My family is watching through these as my daughter has never seen them. We are through the first three. It is fun to get her reactions to them as they are new to her.

I had forgotten that Temple of Doom is actually a prequel to Lost Ark. It takes place 1935 where Lost Ark is 1936.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/08/13 15:18:29


Post by: Sigur


The Honeymooners is one of those remakes that uses an all-black cast (well, not ALL black, but mostly). Main characters are played by Cedric the Entertainer (who I knew from the Barbershop films, of which I'm weirdly fond of) and Gabrielle Union (who is a very pretty lady and does a reasonably nice job in the film, despite the old "very pretty lady married to a not-conventionally-handsome man who acts silly" trapping).

I enjoy the temple of doom, possibly my favourite indiana jones film.



Alien Warfare (2019)

Oh, this one I just remembered. It's been a few weeks. Watched it on Netflix. What a trainwreck. It's not even a trainwreck, because that poor film never had a chance. Who made this? And why? It's basically four navy seals with big arms who are trapped in a superduper secret research facility besieged by aliens.

Funny thing is that the main character's actor used to be in the navy seals and it seems like this would be his break into acting. Poor guy. Each time he's on screen you can see this look of "what have I gotten into?" on his face. The aliens are amazing. I'd love to know the budget they had for this film. I've sat through it, so I got a sort of morbid fascination with it. But really, it's not worth it. Do you know the less entertaining Asylum films? The ones in which Parker Lewis leads a squad of mercenaries through a wood somewhere in the US or canada and every 20 minutes 3 CG Pterodactyls of weirdly varying size (i mean size varying between scenes or cuts) attack them? Alien Warfare is less exciting than those.

Anyway, don't watch.


Showdown in Manila (2016)

Now this is somewhat of a special film. Someone in Russia decided that bodybuilder and possibly robot Alexander Nevsky should be an actor. According to Wikipedia he actually is (along with being a writer and producer) and has done films since 2000. So he plays the lead in this film, which is kinda like Russian Expendables. Or rather the Expendables' second cousins, built around a Russian guy. It also stars Casper van Dien (who is always fun to watch), Cynthia Rothrock (who Rothrocks films), Tia Carrere (who Rothrocks my universe) and bloody Cary-Hiroyuki Tagawa (Shao Khan and several other bad guys). Out of all of those nobody's in the film for more than ~7 minutes at best, except for Casper van Dien, who's basically Nevsky's wacky sidekick. Interesting casting there. If you ever doubted that Casper van Dien was a good actor who emotes a lot you just have to see him acting next to Alexander Nevsky. The man looks like a robot and acts like a robot. You have to see it to believe it.

Oh, the plot? It's about a group of mercenaries killing bad guys in the jungle of Manila.

Watch It, if you recognize and of the above names. If you know these names you'll enjoy the film or at least will find it interesting. If you want to see a more entertaining Casper van Dien film, there's one in which he's bascially Indiana Jones / Brandon Fraser and helps a lady dig up a tomb in Egypt in the early 20th century and they unleash something supernatural. I kinda liked that one.


Ernest & Celestine (2014)

An anmiated film about a mouse and a bear who become friends. In a world that has mice and bears live strictly separated. It's an entirely nice film which looks gorgeous and oozes heart and humour and stuff. And it's pretty clever. Got nominated for an Academy Award, but it was given to something less cool.

Watch It, no matter where or who you are.




Ha, thanks for telling me about this thread, Easy E. It's nice writing about films I saw again.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/08/13 16:14:28


Post by: LunarSol


Watching Temple of Doom the day before Crystal Skull made me far less angry at the latter than most people seem to be...


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/08/13 18:31:41


Post by: gorgon


 Easy E wrote:
 greatbigtree wrote:
I had not realized it's a 50 year old film now! I was born 13 years after it was made, and just saw it this past week.

It's in desperate need of a recut. There is so much filler in there. For anyone interested, the IMDB has a few trailers, both old and new, and it really is one of those movies where all the best parts are in the trailer. Perhaps in it's time, but today it just feels like a director that couldn't cut what needed to be cut.

@ the OP: This was fun, I'm going to have to try and remember what the last movie I saw before 2001 was.


Pacing 50 years ago was very different than pacing today......

This was violently driven home to me when I was watching the commentary on From Russia With Love and Goldfinger. They were talking about how the editor at the time was so revolutionary because he used more quick cuts and other editorial techniques to ramp up the pacing. I love both those movies, but compared to modern movies..... the pacing is slow, slow, slow.

Audiences had very different expectations back then.


Pacing has changed a lot. I've been rewatching Six Million Dollar Man episodes lately, and it's interesting to me how -- in the context of what was considered an action show -- so many scenes involve characters standing around discussing the latest plot complications and what their next steps will be. Shows and movies move far faster now, with many more cuts to satisfy audiences with a tiny fraction of the attention span of audiences 40 years ago. But that modern flash too often hides weak or empty writing, IMO.

HOWEVER, 2001 doesn't represent the pacing of the era. It was glacial even by 1968 standards. Compare it with, say, Bullitt, which also premiered in '68. It was Kubrick's decision to shoot it that way. And I think it works well if you understand the film as kind of a meditation.

FYI, 2001 is a different experience in a theater, IMO. There are just a lot of little things that work better. For example, those closeups of HAL's eye become enormous on the big screen, underlining HAL's powerful, all-seeing, all-knowing presence on board the Discovery.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/08/13 19:21:17


Post by: Mad Doc Grotsnik


 Easy E wrote:
 Mad Doc Grotsnik wrote:
He-Man goes mental in Vietnam, and is killed by Timecop.

They both come back as sort of techno zombies. He-Man goes mental again.


Universal Soldier?


Sorry for the late reply!

Well done! Have a whole Internet


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/08/14 10:07:38


Post by: Ratius


Traffic (2000).
Cannot recommend this enough.
Focuses on the drug war on the Mexican/US sides of the border telling the intertwined stories of users, police, army, government and dealers.
Brilliant acted, brilliantly shot, simply brilliant.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/08/14 13:21:08


Post by: greatbigtree


As part of my ongoing effort to show my boys the iconic sci-fi from my youth...

The Terminator:

Summary: A scary computer from the future sends a cyborg back in time to kill the mother of the leader of the human resistance before said leader is born. The leader of the human resistance sends his father back in time to protect / impregnate his mother, so that he will be born. The mother lives, and the circle is complete.

Analysis: Lots of car chases. It was a thing at the time the movie was made. Lots of bystanders killed. Overall, the movie seems to present a case for the ends justifying the means. The protector doesn’t blink an eye over possibly hundreds of casualties in order to protect the future. A core element of the future franchise is the question of whether or not fate can be changed. Would John Connor have been born if the Protector wasn’t sent back? Did previous timelines mutate due to other attempts at time travel, until the Protector, sent on a different mission, hooked up with Sarah (the mother) and created a stable loop, creating a fate that no longer changes?

Recommendation: If you haven’t seen it, you should see it. The effects aren’t terrible, but fall below modern standards of VFX. Watching this movie informs the background of T2: Judgement Day and T2 is an excellent movie that should also be watched.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/08/14 13:25:32


Post by: Sigur


@Mad Doc Grotsnik: Have you watched the Director's commentary by Emmerich about Universal Soldier? To this day one of the most interesting director's commentary I've seen.

@Ratius: Oh yes, Traffic is a strong film.

@greatbigtree: This is a very nice username. And I agree with your views on the film.



Mid-90s (2018)

Keeping in the theme with recent films, here's that Jonah Hill one. I recently watched this one. It's basically about a boy who lives with his older brother and single mom who got her kids when she was really young. The boy really, really wants to skate and wants to get to hang out with a group of other (older) boys who spend all day at a skateboard shop and/or skating and pretty much are layabouts and of precarious social backgrounds.

This film could easily have fallen apart instantly if the boy who plays the main character wasn't that bloody good an actor and just easy to root for.

It's not really a coming-of-age film, but in a way it is. It's not really a feel-good film (because usually that term is used to describe horrible, horrible films), but it makes you feel kinda good.

Watch It. It's really good. Even if you haven't been a young boy in the mid-1990s in the US.



Fire and Ice (1982)

Now for something completely different. Fire and Ice is an animated film by Ralph Bakshi. To get the characters to look more naturalistic in the many, many action scenes Bakshi made extensive use of rotoscopy (the technique in which scenes are shot with actors and then get drawn over to create animated films with very natural-looking movements), just as in his earlier films like Lord of the Rings or Wizards.

The plot is bascially about the kingdom of fire and the kingdom of ice being at war, during a round of negotiations the baddies (ice dudes) kidnap princess Teegra. A barbarian dude... well, no, everybody looks like a barbarian dude in this film. Let's say the main barbarian dude by chance meets her and lateron tries to rescue her from the clutches of the bad guy NECRON (souvereign of the realm of ice) and his evil mum.

This one was made during the Barbarian and fantasy craze of the early 1980s. The film very much feels like a comicbook (and y'all love those, right?). Lots and lots of action scenes. If you like butts and chestical areas of all sorts this is the film for you. The plot itself is very, very thin, but the film is entertaining and fun to watch. Not sure if it's that entertaining if you are too far detached from the time it was made. If you're 8 to 11, this film will blow your mind. Otherwise your mileage may vary. I'm kinda fond of it, because I like "old school" Fantasy things and "old school" films. At least it's different.

As for a short verdict - impossible to say. Watch It. Or don't Watch. Or Pass. Up to you.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/08/14 13:52:24


Post by: Easy E


I recently watched Fire and Ice as well. I think my thoughts are on page 3.

Definitely an odd watch for modern viewers.

I could not help but think modern versions of Batman were inspired by wolf mask guys portrayal in the film. It made me giggle everytime I saw him on screen.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/08/14 20:25:29


Post by: Sigur


The funny thing is that when we watched it the very first connection that popped up when we saw Wolfmaskguy was Batman as well. Mostly because he pops up out of nowhere any just kills all the bad guys. There was a lot of giggling throughout the film in general. But yeah, I'm just a sucker for proper old-school fantasy. Even though Fire and Ice is a bit much even for me when it comes to the plot. After the third time Teegra escapes the Subhumans (as they're called in the end credits. Wow. ) and gets captured again a bit of tiredness sets in.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/08/17 07:28:35


Post by: BobtheInquisitor


Sounds like I need to watch Showdown in Manilla.

I also thought Once Upon a Time in Hollywood was worth seeing, especially if you're a fan of that era of cinema or television.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/08/17 15:59:58


Post by: Sigur


The Dark Valley (2014)

End of the 19th century, a stranger enters a village in Tyrol to spend the winter. Nasty things happen.

Finally got to see that one.The idea is really, really interesting: It's basically a Western (dark/gritty/etc) set in a valley (which noone can get ouf of because it's winter). The village is controlled by a farmer and his sons. It helps that they got a bunch of good actors (and an Englishman to play the stranger. Sam Riley.). They really make the most of the landscape and the scenery. It looks overwhelming, it looks depressing, it looks amazing. There also are some really good shots in general. The film loves a good bit of violence and some of it seems gratuitous and self-serving. The whole story is very grim, but visually it's really well made. The opening scene sets the mood for the whole thing, but somehow I think it's unnecessary. Oh well.

If you want to watch an atmospheric, dark Western in an unusual setting, Watch It. In most parts is looks amazing, it establishes an interesting world. However, it's violent, so not for the squeamish. Oh, and also watch if you want to see one of the most unique wedding scenes on film. Without Tarantino and Italo-Westerns this film wouldn't exist. I find it baffling, that so far no other films like it, set in the alps, have been made.



Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/08/19 03:37:34


Post by: greatbigtree


Terminator 2:

Summary: John Connor was born, and becomes a full-on delinquent. His mom winds up in a psych ward. Skynet decides to try and kill John this time, instead of mom. Sends back a liquid metal Terminator, that can mimic anyone. The human resistance sends back a copy of the first Terminator, because otherwise Arnold wouldn't be in it. After lots. And lots. And lots of car chases, the good guys blow up Cyberdyne and the recovered Terminator bits from the first movie. Then more car chases happen, the good guys wind up melting the terminators in molten steel, and we all feel good because we stopped judgement day.

Analysis: Although the film makes a point of being able to change fate, per my earlier assessment of T1, this is just the continuation of a stable time loop. Skynet still needed to be developed in the "first" timeline, sending the first Terminator back in time. Although the Connors have delayed Judgement Day, have they really averted it?

Recommendation: I would say that by popular opinion, this is the best of the series. Gets a little schmaltzy towards the end, but maybe that's what tips it over for most people. I'd say it's a cultural touchstone of Sci Fi, so definitely worth seeing.


Terminator 3:

Summary: John Connor has grown up and is living the life of a typical adventurer. While the *murder* part of the murder-hobo lifestyle of the typical adventurer is left to the imagination... he's got some miles on him. John wipes out on his motorcycle, breaks into a veterinarian's office for drugs and meets up with an old flame... but she's engaged! Not for long though, because a Terminatrix shows up and dusts the fiancee's ass. Our old friend Arnold shows up again, to protect John and the Flame. But this time, the badguy is even better! With arm cannons and plasma guns and such! John continues to fight fate, making decisions based on information provided to him by *unreliable* sources. He gets to the secret lair of Skynet...
Spoiler:

But there is no lair! Skynet is the Internet! They could never blow up a computer core or anything like that, Sucka! Instead, they're in a bomb-proof command bunker where they can start the resistance. The time loop is still on track.


Analysis:

I like T3, although many other people don't. It's fun, there's probably 2 fewer car chases, though the crane chase? I cringe every time. Just completely immersion breaking for me. I like how every "choice" John and company make to try to stop Skynet brings them to their eventual destiny. I think it would have been easy to have the "happy" ending and stop Skynet, and the world lives on in peace and harmony. But truthfully, by the time the movie starts, Skynet is already making it's move on humanity. It's already too late. Done poorly, it's a sucker punch to the audience but to me, it felt perfect for the series. Rain falls on the mountain, and runs back to the sea. You can put up a dam, reroute the water, but it makes its way back to the sea.

Recommendation: Terminator 3 is *my* favourite movie from the series. To me, it fits thematically and hits the proper notes of a tragedy. The protagonists have perfect agency throughout their adventure. They choose every step of their path. They are trying to "win" in a stable time loop where their willing decisions have already been made. They tried and failed... but still put themselves exactly where they needed to be to enact their fate, and eventually win their battle. I don't know what the movie would be like as a stand-alone. There are one or two brilliant moments of dark humour. The Flame, unaware of their situation asks John who he is. John bangs on the window and orders the Terminator to inform her of who John Connor is... The leader of the human resistance and effective saviour of the human race. All deadpan, matter of fact, no regard for it sounding ludicrous. I would recommend that all three of the Terminator movies should be viewed, in order. T3 has a hook in it that sticks with me more strongly than the others.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/08/19 11:26:34


Post by: Sigur


Yeah, I also think that T3 is perfectly OK. Not as groundbreaking as 1 or 2, but perfectly OK, especially considering what followed.


Passengers (2016)

I watched this one not knowing anything about the film, but right from the start it looked really, really good. I love the spaceship in that film and the way it's shot. It's about a dude (Chris Pratt, very pretty blue-collar american, with all the trappings that comes with that) who, along with many other people, travels to Mars to colonize it for a ton of years years in stasis (travelling, not colonizing. ). Due to some malfunction, is pod opens, as the system thinks that they arrived. The company who built and runs the ship (and is to blame for this) is mentioned several times. The spaceship basically is a mall run by ONE company. Colonists bought various levels of tickets, allowing for them to have different foods, facilities and so on. So our hero is all alone in that huge spaceship, can't fix the pod, is stuck with ~90 years to go until they arrive at Mars. So he'll pretty much die alone on this huge spaceship, with nobody but a robot barkeeper (played by Martin Sheen of course) keeping him company. He's an engineer who saw no future for himself on Earth (robots, digitalization, this endless longing for the simple days etc. playing into this) and wants to be somewhere where his engineering/mechanic skills will be useful.

He ends up looking through the bios of the other passengers (each of which had to enter a little application video thing, because it's 2016-future), sees that Jennifer bloody Lawrence is in one of the pods as well. She's an author (of course) from a rich family and as per the decree of 2014 everybody has to be in love with Jennifer Lawrence. Which is OK. He reads her stories, he watches her video over and over and falls obsessively in love with her, sitting by her pod, looking at her. Some day, considering he'll go insane all on his own, he gets the idea of making her pod "malfunction" and wake her up, so he can be with her. He's aghast at himself harboring this idea at all, but can't get it out of his head. And then he does it, essentially condemning her to death on this ship, alone with him, but he just loves her so much, or the image of her he got from reading her prose, watching the video, and so on.

What an eternally interesting setup. And the way this whole thing unfolds gets really, really interesting as well. And that spaceship is so cool.

Recently I heard that modern films all have four endings, and usually three too many. Which I think is true. And it goes for this film. As soon as the explosions start the thing goes downhill. This film could have done without the last half hour and certainly without

Spoiler:
the happy ending.


Such a very, very interesting film, and well acted too. It's easy to blame "studio interference" and "marketing people interfering", but it so often feels like that's the case.


Watch It, it's interesting. Feel free to skip the last third or so.



The Marine 4 - Moving Target (2015)

In this fourth installment of the beloved-by-somebody Marine franchise we see the hero of the three(?) prior films having become a bodyguard dude and him and his bodyguard coworkers have to get a really, really important girl who's a hacker appearantly to destination B. The girl is of the hollywood rebellious daughter type, so really pretty and all made up, but wearing a hollywood-grungy shirt and acts smug for 10 minutes until it's time to switch to damsel-in-distress mode.

The convoi of vehicles is attacked by military baddies, everybody gets shot, the Marine and the girl have to run through the woods and the baddies run after them. Marine and girl bond a little in a non-creepy way. The Marine wins in the end.

Don't Watch. I can't think of a reason why, unless you're a HUGE fan of the movie work of the main guy, but then I wouldn't think why one would be. If you're dying to see a Marine film (HOMEFRONT. I have no idea why I remember the full titles of these films. Probably because they're so ridiculous), watch the third one. That one doesn't feel quite as cheap either and has more of an amusing 'murca! feel to it. If you're dying to see the guy act, watch Santa's Little Helper.



Nightcrawler (2014)

Jake Gyllenhaal plays an unsuccessful man who makes a bit of money stealing things and selling them on. He lives in a bizarre parallel world and only seems to be up at night. During the day he's in his dimly lit apartment, watching (economic) success advisers' videos on youtube, reading books by these people, and so on. He completely internalizes the language and logic of these people. One night he happens across a big traffic accident and meets a cameraman and reporter who listen in on emergency calls and go there go get juicy video footage of maimed and mangled people which they then sell on to tv news channels.

Gyllenhaal's character is fascinated by this. It's right up his alley. So he grabs a camera and learns the craft hands-on. And he's successful with it. With this success comes further success, all driven by his ruthless logic as worked out by success advisors within the neoliberal context. He lives it.

This is a great film. The dialogues between Gyllenhaal and the intern he hires are funny and revealing. There are several chilling scenes between Gyllenhaal and Renee Russo (who plays the boss of the news channel he sells the footage to). There's a bit of media criticism in there of course, but mostly it's about this weird, weird character who technically should be declared sociopath and dysfunctional, but within this world he acts in he's a perfect fit not only to survive, but to thrive. Gyllenhaal I think often tries way too hard and especially in dramatic roles has a tendency to grimace, but for this very role he was the perfect fit and did an amazing job to make this unsettling character walk the fine line between funny, almost relateable in how he acts in the face of this world he's confronted with, only to repel us again with the next line of dialogue.

Must-Watch. It happens rarely, but after watching this one I was really enthusiastic about it. What a film.


Velvet Buzzsaw (2019)

...along came Netflix. In a really weird move, they bought pretty much the cast of Nightcrawler and made a horror film with them, set in the US art dealers scene. An upcoming art dealer lady discovers a vault of art by a crazy dude who nobody knows about, but everybody's really into it. But then scary things start happening to people who buy and hang his pictures...

I'm pretty sure that this is one of those films about which people claim that they're made by an algorithm. There are some fun jabs at the whole art scene, but ultimately it's got nothing new to say about it apart from the "jokes" we've been hearing about it since the 1980s. In the end it's a very formulaic supernatural horror film in an interesting setting (with which they don't do all that much) with an expensive cast.

Don't Watch. Watch Nightcrawler instead.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/08/19 11:32:22


Post by: Mad Doc Grotsnik


Avengers End Game

Came out on Digital this morning (in the UK, USA has had it for a couple of weeks now).

Watched the first hour or so on my commute to work, and enjoying it every bit as much as when I first saw it.

Shall continue on my commute home. Then maybe watch it again tonight.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/08/20 15:48:22


Post by: Easy E


Indiana Jones and the Crystal Skull

After watching all the films back-to-back I actually liked this movie more than when I saw it in the theater.

In tone and style it fits very nicely with the others. In addition, the way Indy acts is in nice parallel to the way his dad was acting in Last Crusade.

However, once they get into the jungle, things get a bit ropey. Some of the acting starts to fall apart, and then the scene with the monkeys, and the ending..... the ending goes way over board.... like way too far beyond what the other Indie films did. Ultimately, the movie tried to take too much of the mystery out of things and did not leave enough for the audience to fill in with imagination. They showed too much.

My daughter even called out the CGI being a distraction compared to the practical effects of the other films! Wow!


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/08/20 16:32:00


Post by: Frazzled


 Sigur wrote:
Yeah, I also think that T3 is perfectly OK. Not as groundbreaking as 1 or 2, but perfectly OK, especially considering what followed.


Nightcrawler (2014)

Jake Gyllenhaal plays an unsuccessful man who makes a bit of money stealing things and selling them on. He lives in a bizarre parallel world and only seems to be up at night. During the day he's in his dimly lit apartment, watching (economic) success advisers' videos on youtube, reading books by these people, and so on. He completely internalizes the language and logic of these people. One night he happens across a big traffic accident and meets a cameraman and reporter who listen in on emergency calls and go there go get juicy video footage of maimed and mangled people which they then sell on to tv news channels.

Gyllenhaal's character is fascinated by this. It's right up his alley. So he grabs a camera and learns the craft hands-on. And he's successful with it. With this success comes further success, all driven by his ruthless logic as worked out by success advisors within the neoliberal context. He lives it.

This is a great film. The dialogues between Gyllenhaal and the intern he hires are funny and revealing. There are several chilling scenes between Gyllenhaal and Renee Russo (who plays the boss of the news channel he sells the footage to). There's a bit of media criticism in there of course, but mostly it's about this weird, weird character who technically should be declared sociopath and dysfunctional, but within this world he acts in he's a perfect fit not only to survive, but to thrive. Gyllenhaal I think often tries way too hard and especially in dramatic roles has a tendency to grimace, but for this very role he was the perfect fit and did an amazing job to make this unsettling character walk the fine line between funny, almost relateable in how he acts in the face of this world he's confronted with, only to repel us again with the next line of dialogue.

Must-Watch. It happens rarely, but after watching this one I was really enthusiastic about it. What a film.



Don't Watch. Watch Nightcrawler instead.


Yes, Nightcrawler is epic.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/08/20 21:34:14


Post by: Sigur


@Easy E: I never even watched Crystal Skull. I'm not that huge a fan of Indiana Jones to begin with, so I thought I better skip the one that everybody hates.

@Frazzled: Right on!




The Trouble with Harry (1955)


I think that was Hitchcock's debut film. ALSO happens to be Shirley McLaine's first larger role.

A lovely autumn day, a small town in the US. Several townfolks, one after another, find a dead man lying on the ground nearby the town. Nobody knows how he got there, least of all how he died. A letter is found on his person, so at least they can identify him as Harry. Each of the townsfolk (a retired captain, an ageing lady, a struggling artist, and Harry's estranged ex-wife) each have their own reasons to keep the police and everybody else out of the equation. Some of them team up to keep the situation in check, others try to keep it under wraps all by themselves, but, naturally, things spiral out of control.

It's a dark comedy, played and written really well. The main humour stems from the understatement and the unconcern all the characters display, despite each of them being very concerned indeed. There are some really fun, snappy dialogues in there with a lot of wit and some quirky turns of events. Of Harry all we ever see is his feet, the rest always being hidden behind shrubbery and the like.

Watch It. It's a very enjoyable film. And Shirley McLaine makes everything from the 50s and 60s enjoyable to watch. By the way, watch The Apartment because it's brilliant. Watch Irma La Douce because it's fun.




Possibly not the best thing for a double feature with the above, but thematically in a similar direction, but decidedly more 80s:

Weekend at Bernie's (1989)


Yuppie dude is invited to his extravagant boss's beach house. Boss dies, yuppie dude and his wacky friend have to keep appearances that the dude's still alive. Hijinx ensue. This phrase is probably the best fit for this film altogether.

What can be said that hasn't been said about this one before? It's silly, wacky fun, and it's getting referenced quite often. I remember laughing my bum off as an ~11 year old kid when I saw it the first time.

Like it or not, it's a modern classic. Watch It.. There's a sequel (of course). Which you don't have to watch.



Do watch The Apartment (Shirley McLaine, Jack Lemon) though. It's such a great film.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/08/21 18:55:37


Post by: Easy E


Ralph Wrecks the Internet

A cute enough sequel to the original, that was also cute enough.

The bit with the Disney Princesses is inspired though. Also, it has one of the best post-credit sequences I can recall.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/08/21 20:50:38


Post by: Frazzled


Where'd You Go Bernadatte?

This is the film version of the strange comedic novel. Its told primarily from the Bernadette perspective who plays the primary role in the film. Its about a former brilliant architect who becomes basically housebound due to social anxiety. Her daughter wants to go to Antarctica and Brnadatte gets the idea to actually go. Later there is an intervention of sorts as Bernadatte is sort of cracking up, and she disappears out the window. Shenanigans ensue.

Watch it? If you read the book, yes. If you didn't, its meh.

EDIT: Bonus round.

The Terror (Season One available on Hulu):
The Franklin Expedition (a famous real expedition) in 1845 is trying to find the Northwest Passage. It becomes icebound north of Fair Canadia. While trying to find open water or land one of the crew shoots an Inuit Shaman, drawing an ancient demon bear to them. Fun Filled antics ensue for several years as the crew tries to survive on their ships being snowbound, and still being pursued by the demon bear.
Note: the series has a bunch of excellent actors from the Rome and GOT series.'

Watch it Its some of the best work I've seen in decades. Great acting, great writing, and plot. REALLY CREEPY. It layers in the supernatural with actual events from the real mission. Its fun for the whole family!


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/08/23 13:28:54


Post by: Easy E


RE: Passenger's.... I had heard some criticism that it is a bit "Rapey" or at least anti-consent in nature. For those who watched it, is that an overblown meta-textual analysis?


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/08/23 14:37:15


Post by: Sigur


Not at all. That's the main thing that makes the first half interesting.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/08/24 07:26:03


Post by: SeanDrake


 Easy E wrote:
RE: Passenger's.... I had heard some criticism that it is a bit "Rapey" or at least anti-consent in nature. For those who watched it, is that an overblown meta-textual analysis?


Yeah that's pretty much the point, it mainly gets away with it because the main character is self aware enough to know he was a terrible person and that he was under extreme stress when he does wake her up having resisted for years before more or less having a breakdown.

I also have no problem with the explodey bits or the ending which I see as not so much happy but inevitable given what came before and human nature.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/08/24 10:58:03


Post by: Sigur


The explodey bits were OK, except for the last ~20 minutes of explodey bits. Just too much explodey bits and too many endings.

Spoiler:
Whether or not the happy end is a good thing or not I'm unsure about. There were like two or three instances at which the main dude should have died and things would have been fine. On the other hand the happy end almost subverts people's expectations. Problem is that it's been done in a very blunt Hollywood way.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/08/25 11:01:01


Post by: Mad Doc Grotsnik


Watching The Hunger Games.

It’s actually pretty alright. Still wish a Predator would show up though.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/08/28 09:49:53


Post by: Sigur


Battle Royale (2000)

It's the thing on which all the things are based on. Japanese film about the educational system, Japanese culture and media via means of "a class of Japanese schoolgirls and -boys are placed on an island, forced to kill each other unil just one remains. He or she is the winner.". Great, important film, Takeshi Kitano plays the teacher.

Watch It.
It's a modern classic.



Battle Royale 2 (2003)


Similar scenario really, but with a twist (more militaristic in nature and look, the kids do an uprising thing) and a surprising amount of America-critique, bordering blatant anti-Americanism. The teacher's played by a different dude who's hamming it up to amazing levels. Originally the director of the first film started working on this one, but sadly died after shooting one scene with Takeshi Kitano. His son took over and I think took the film in a quite different direction.

Pass.


Kull (1997)

Yup, the Kevin Sorbo barbarian film. The plot/background is surprisingly deep. Well, not deep, it's more like 'there's a lot of stuff'. We get a text crawl in the beginning, introducing us to the world (made up by the gentleman who also invented Conan, Solomon Kane and other things. The poor guy shot himself in his car, aged 30, after learning about his mother's terminal illness), throws lots of names at us. Then we are introduced to our hero, Kull of Atlantis (played by Kevin Sorbo. Of course. Becuase it's 1997), killing lots of soldier dudes with a huge axe while credits roll and we hear heavy metal/hard rock music playing. The music in this film is great. It's like in the Doom (2016) game - when the action starts we get metal music. It's so simple, but it's really fun and gets you pumped. Kevin Sorbo is at the peak of his Sorboness in this film. Nobody wants to see him as a handsome professor in Dharma and Greg or as a devil-ridden atheist professor in "Films made for the evangelical fundamentalist". Long hair, bracers, oiled-up arms and at least 60% chest showing. This is how we want our Sorbo. And this film delivers that. Other things this film delivers: Amazing hairdos and wigs. Not sure why, but every male extra seems to be wearing a big wig in this film. The somewhat bad-ish-but-I-don't-really-know-why guy, played by Thomas Ian Griffith, has a good time in this film, and sports an amazing hairdo. It's like he decided to have a mullet, but then just didn't stop growing it out in the back. In some scenes he's got a bit of it braided, in others he doesn't.

If I don't have your attention now, how about this: The evil sorceress is played by Tia Carrere, and the way we like her best - Long hair, bracers, oiled-up arms and at least 60% chest showing. No, that was a cheap joke. She's really good. Everybody's gotta love Tia Carrere, because she. IS. GOOD. In every respect. She gets a lot of screen time and is very entertaining as the baddie.

This film is such an odd duck. For what it is and for when it was made, it looks pretty good. CG is used in a surprisingly restrained way for 1997, and it has a nice amount of practical effects and mat paintings. What makes it interesting is that despite its anachronisms, it very much feels like a 90s barbarian film, the same way Conan or Deathstalker feel like 80s barbarian films. They would make for a very interesting double (or triple) feature (if you feel like you HAVE to include Deathstalker).

The pacing of the film is a bit weird, possibly also a sign of the time at which it was made: It never lets off. There's always something happening, and a LOT happening too. Conan takes his time, builds set pieces and resolves them. Kull has a cut, we're somewhere else, things happen instantly, solution, bam, cut, next scene happens. It sure isn't a well-made film, but it does seem like the writers and director made themselves very familiar with the source material, wanted to stay true to it (as far as I can tell), and also were full of ideas to pack into this film.

All in all, it was a very, very entertaining film. I had a whale of a time watching it. This is how I spent my birthday's evening - sitting with my brother and my sister, watching Kull. Couldn't have been better.

Watch It, if this sounds fun to you. If you only ever saw the film once, many, many years ago, give it another go. It's WAY more fun than you remember.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/08/28 15:18:40


Post by: Easy E


I proudly admit to owning Kull the Conqueror on DVD.

By this Axe.... I rule!


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/08/28 19:15:02


Post by: Sigur


Three days ago I would have raised an eyebrow. Since two days ago I fully understand.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/08/29 09:39:51


Post by: Ratius


Bladerunner 2049 popped up on Netflix so I re-watched it.
Still holds up damn well, great cinematogrophy, music and ambient effects are spot on, some lovely homages to the original and a decent plot.
Really awesome performances from the female cast too. In fact they stole they show imo.

Well worth a watch if you havent seen it.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/08/29 09:57:04


Post by: Turnip Jedi


 Ratius wrote:
Bladerunner 2049 popped up on Netflix so I re-watched it.
Still holds up damn well, great cinematogrophy, music and ambient effects are spot on, some lovely homages to the original and a decent plot.
Really awesome performances from the female cast too. In fact they stole they show imo.

Well worth a watch if you havent seen it.


I'll give it a go over the weekend, whilst it was visually stunning at the cinema I was still undecided but never got round to a second watch


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/09/03 12:30:44


Post by: Frazzled


Peanut Butter Falcon.
If you are tired of Marvel spandex movies, see it.

Good acting. Fun scenes and dialogue. Overall just a good movie with a hokey but happy ending.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/09/03 13:30:26


Post by: Easy E


Watched Minority Report over the weekend.

There is actually a lot of cool stuff going on in this movie, it is too bad that the plot is just pot boiler thriller material. It could have been so much more and has the mandatory "happy" ending for almost all involved.

Too bad due to casting you know the villain immediately, because why else would you cast him? Also funny to see the actor for Damian Dark in something other than the DC TV-verse.



also watched A Knight's Tale

That was a cracking good yarn. Sure, it is not high art, but it is rollicking good fun. We need more Jousting movies!


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/09/04 13:48:11


Post by: Turnip Jedi


 Easy E wrote:


also watched A Knight's Tale

That was a cracking good yarn. Sure, it is not high art, but it is rollicking good fun. We need more Jousting movies!


it is indeed an awesomely daft film that embraces its MTV goes a jousting vibe right from the get go (although still struggle with Rufus being a baddy !)

watched Arrival, still a cracking slice of sci-fi, but then again, if not for those pesky court orders, I could watch Ms Adams in nearly anything not involving hobojesus of steel and his idiot chums


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/09/04 17:32:41


Post by: Easy E


 Turnip Jedi wrote:
 Easy E wrote:


also watched A Knight's Tale

That was a cracking good yarn. Sure, it is not high art, but it is rollicking good fun. We need more Jousting movies!


it is indeed an awesomely daft film that embraces its MTV goes a jousting vibe right from the get go (although still struggle with Rufus being a baddy !)

watched Arrival, still a cracking slice of sci-fi, but then again, if not for those pesky court orders, I could watch Ms Adams in nearly anything not involving hobojesus of steel and his idiot chums


I think Rufus played the part of Count Adamar really well.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/09/04 20:11:54


Post by: Turnip Jedi


oh aye but prior to that he was generally a pretty boy goody in most things, so mean Rufus was a surprise


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/09/04 20:52:22


Post by: Trondheim


I wathced the movie 9th company after dinner today. The film is based on a true story of the 9th company during the Soviet invasion in Afghanistan in the 1980's. Young Soviet Army recruits are sent from a boot camp into the middle of the war in Afghanistan.

Great movie I dare say, a view on a rather grim and all around pointless war waged in the last days of the cold war.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/09/04 23:54:38


Post by: greatbigtree


From Dusk till Dawn:

Summary: Two ne’erdowell brothers (Clooney and Terintino) kidnap a family, go to Mexico, and wind up at a Strip club where low and behold... they’re vampires! Cheech Marin plays at *least* three roles. This is apparently George Clooney’s first major role. Presumably, Terintino plays himself in this film.

Analysis: All of the characters are pretty throw-away. A briefly interesting exploration of the old “no atheists in the foxholes” idea. Terintino really feels like life imitating art. A somewhat fun ride who’s only real surprise is having two (2) survivors instead of the typical one. Plenty of nudity.

Recommendation: Watch it. With your brain tuned to static, not a station. It barely holds to any kind of internal logic, much less external logic, but something about it is rewatchable, and snippets of the move have stuck with me for a very long time.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/09/12 11:49:57


Post by: Sigur


Yeah, I still gotta watch the new Bladerunner film. I'm sure I'll like it though.

The other night I watched They Live (1989) again.

An unemployed man (who used to work on oil fields, until they got shut down) comes to town, tries to find a job, eventually finds one at a construction yard. Runs across weirdness going on. A pair of sunglasses comes into his possession and as he puts them on he world as it really is. *ominous music*

What a great, enjoyable film. Good, high-concept sci-fi/horror with a 60s vibe, great lead(s) in Roddy Piper and Keith David (plus freaky-eyed Meg Foster), great atmosphere and great designs. Despite some superficial tone and pacing bits (woudln't call it problems, because it's more interesting than problematic), this film is so ...stringent in what it does.

Spoiler:
Right at the end the two heroes have to get to the roof. Not even the lift works for them and they take the stairs. It's just a small bit, but this film seems to make a very clear distinction between the rich and the poor, and makes it clear for whom technology is made


This film feels like a film about the working class. There are basically no overlaps or even touching points between them and the upper class apart from violence (both ways, physical or vocal).


Must-See, because this is something that in this way and this clarity probably could have never ever been made at any other point in time (in Hollywood) than 1989. It's really interesting and really entertaining. Also: It's getting referenced a lot, so you have to watch it anyway.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/09/12 13:24:46


Post by: Easy E


*Just put on the damn sunglasses*

Such a glorious and gratuitous fight scene!


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/09/12 15:13:52


Post by: Sigur


Absolutely. It's one of those pacing things, I guess.

I think the point is (as it's been pointed out by people who are far more educated and clever than I am) that the scene's about what a struggle and how painful it is for either side to take/accept an ideology-critical view of things or something like that. And I'd actually be willing to believe that this was Carpenter's intention with that endless fight scene.



Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/09/12 16:27:45


Post by: SeanDrake


 Easy E wrote:
*Just put on the damn sunglasses*

Such a glorious and gratuitous fight scene!


Held the record for longest fight scene and I believe in 1 take for years until the bar fight in Shanghai Noon beat it decades later.

Apparently most of the injuries from the fight were real


Automatically Appended Next Post:
 Sigur wrote:
Absolutely. It's one of those pacing things, I guess.

I think the point is (as it's been pointed out by people who are far more educated and clever than I am) that the scene's about what a struggle and how painful it is for either side to take/accept an ideology-critical view of things or something like that. And I'd actually be willing to believe that this was Carpenter's intention with that endless fight scene.



I always just thought it was showing how hard it is to get the truth past an ingrained lie which I guess could be slightly relevant today


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/09/12 17:23:35


Post by: Sigur


Woah, did not know that thing about the 1-take. Pretty cool.

I always just thought it was showing how hard it is to get the truth past an ingrained lie which I guess could be slightly relevant today


Yus, pretty much.




Laurel Canyon (2002)

A not-quite-yet well-off couple (he's a pychiatrist starting his job in LA, she's working on her disseration about genetics) are out of an apartment for now, move into his (Christian Bale) mom (Frances McDormand)'s house. The lady's played by Kate Beckinsale, but I didn't recognize her, for I do not recognize Kate Beckinsale ever. The lady from the Truman Show and Californication is in there as well. The mom is a music producer who lives a radically different lifestyle than her son and his girlfriend.

Frances McDormand of course is the star in this film, because isn't she always (maybe with the exception of The Man Who Wasn't There), and her character certainly is the most interesting. Bale and Beckinsale are pretty good in contrasting her, I guess. The whole film is rather unremarkable. Things happen which change lives, but it's all O.K.

Pass. It's really nothing special. It's nice. It's okay, It's got a great cast who do a good job. But in the end it's just not very exciting.


Automatically Appended Next Post:
Monster House (2006)

It's a 3d animated horror comedy film about a boy who is convinced that his opposite neighbor's house is haunted.

I got a soft spot for this film, because of how 'small' it is. It's about two boys and a girl who investigate (and lateron try to destroy) this haunted house. There are some plot holes and whatnot, but I really enjoy the mood and look of the film. And it's rather interesting to see where it goes. I'm not a huge fan of the ending, but it's a proper nice Halloween film. Maybe a bit too "fast" and scary for the smallest of kids, but it's a solid flick to watch.

Watch it.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/09/13 13:29:31


Post by: SeanDrake


To be fair I don’t know if you have seen Shanghai Noon but the salon fight lasts 14min is all one take and has about 40 stuntmen/woman involved on top of Jackie Chan and Owen Wilson.
It is amazingly well done with stuff happening in the background of every shot that in another movie would be the main attraction.
Even now I don’t think it has been topped.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/09/13 18:27:34


Post by: Frazzled


Monster House is Awesome. The kids and us parents loved it.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/09/13 20:18:38


Post by: Elbows


The 13th Warrior...for the 1300th time or so...


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/09/13 20:34:09


Post by: Mad Doc Grotsnik


 Frazzled wrote:
Monster House is Awesome. The kids and us parents loved it.


Para Norman is in a similar vein if you’ve not seen it


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/09/15 22:46:48


Post by: Sigur


@SeanDrake: I've seen Shanghai Noon bascially when it came out on video/dvd. But it's been a while. However, if I trust one person to work out a 15min barfight it's Jackie Chan. He's the absolute king of that stuff. Have you seen Shanghai Knights? I've seen about 15min of that, but really didn't care to go on thereafter.

@Frazzled: May I ask how old the kids were when they first saw it? I have no idea when this one can be shown to kids.

@Elbows: Why?

@Mad Doc Grotsnik: Yeah, I hear good things about it. Haven't seen it yet though. With animated films it usually takes me a lazy/hungover day of basically being bound to a sofa and watching what ever is on.



Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/09/16 00:35:25


Post by: Elbows


Sigur: Because it's my favourite film.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/09/17 15:03:50


Post by: Easy E


I watched the re-make of the Taking of Pelham 123 with John Travolta and Denzel Washington. It is a thriller where bad guys take-over a subway car.

By reading that description, you know EXACTLY what you are going to get. John Travolta hamming it up and having a great time, Denzel Washington playing his everyman, and follows every Thriller cliche in the book.

Actually, it is rather forgettable.... I had forgotten I watched it until a week later when I realized I had not posted in this thread for a while!


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/09/19 13:03:03


Post by: Sigur


 Elbows wrote:
Sigur: Because it's my favourite film.


Fair enough.

@Easy E: Not sure I've seen that one. I think I saw the original once.

One of my favourite Denzel Washington films is the one in which he's a cop who brought in John Lithgow. Lithgow befriends a huge nazi gang in prison and once he's let go on parole starts the pettiest, nastiest revenge campaign against Washington possible.
Oh, and I really dig Fallen. Can't hear the Rolling Stones song without thinking of that film. It's rather weird, but stuck to me.

Sure, there's also training day and all of that... but those two to me are the quintessential Denzel Washington films. He's a good one.



Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/09/19 13:30:46


Post by: Easy E


I have heard the original is a tour de force from Walter Mathau. I do not think I have seen the original.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/09/19 14:47:21


Post by: Frazzled


 Sigur wrote:
@SeanDrake: I've seen Shanghai Noon bascially when it came out on video/dvd. But it's been a while. However, if I trust one person to work out a 15min barfight it's Jackie Chan. He's the absolute king of that stuff. Have you seen Shanghai Knights? I've seen about 15min of that, but really didn't care to go on thereafter.

@Frazzled: May I ask how old the kids were when they first saw it? I have no idea when this one can be shown to kids.

@Elbows: Why?

@Mad Doc Grotsnik: Yeah, I hear good things about it. Haven't seen it yet though. With animated films it usually takes me a lazy/hungover day of basically being bound to a sofa and watching what ever is on.



Decently young. GC was about 8ish.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/09/19 19:38:56


Post by: SeanDrake


Speaking of Mr D Washington I caught the Book of Eli one night last week, I have a soft spot for it as I think it’s very underrated and has some very nicely done fight scenes. Coupled with a twist that makes you watch it again in a new light.

It’s a post apocalyptic story of a man in world somewhere between Fallout and Mad Max who is on a mission from god to walk from the us east coast to the west coast and he’s a number of years 12 I think into the journey. Also a valuable tale of why not to feth with someone’s music collection.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/09/21 07:57:15


Post by: Sigur


@Frazzled: cheers!

@SeanDrake: Yeah, I enjoyed that one as well. Some people dislike the twist due to a weird reflex some people have.



Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/09/21 17:27:52


Post by: Turnip Jedi


Watched Annihilation (for some reason I thought I already had but seems my aging brain is getting trixy)

There is a lot going on, got a kind of Apocalypse Now meets Cosmic Horror vibe off it, and even lil Natty P (who I don't normally rate) puts in a solid turn, worth a watch or three

Also kind of a shame it didn't get a cinema release as there are some stunning visuals


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/09/22 14:43:15


Post by: Turnip Jedi


Baby Driver

Edgar effortlessly out Tarantino's QT in a genius work of cinema

also started on new Sabrina, wasnt my cup of tea but then the tease of the always watchable Richard Coyle at the end of ep1 so maybe I'll stick with it


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/09/23 15:44:20


Post by: Easy E


Hell or High Water

I enjoyed it for what it was. It kind of felt like a throwback to the idea of gangster as folk-hero sticking it to The Man. The setting in West Texas is handled very well and almosts acts like another character. The Texas Ranger characters after our "heroes" are also compelling.

I recommend it. I would love to hear Frazzleds take on it.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/09/23 16:38:44


Post by: Frazzled


 Easy E wrote:
Hell or High Water

I enjoyed it for what it was. It kind of felt like a throwback to the idea of gangster as folk-hero sticking it to The Man. The setting in West Texas is handled very well and almosts acts like another character. The Texas Ranger characters after our "heroes" are also compelling.

I recommend it. I would love to hear Frazzleds take on it.


Absolutely loved it. Showed some of the spirit of West Texas. Note, much of actual West Texas is even worse (its literally No Country for Old Men). It really represents the struggle of working people and their desperation.

Also has the Llano Escacado!
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Llano_Estacado


EDIT: May I also recommend, if you can, Chernobyl. Its a mini series, not a movie, but incredible acting and show. There's a reason it just won a truckload of Emmys.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/09/24 14:56:21


Post by: Easy E


I loved the scene in Hell or High Water where the rangers come across cowboys herding a bunch of cattle away from a brush fire.

The Cowboy's dialogue is hilarious, infuriating, and frustrating all at the same time.

Per IMDB:


Marcus Hamilton : [Rangers encounter cowboys driving cattle across the road before a brush fire] Hey! What you all doing? You burning this field?

Cowboy : Why in the s*** would we do that? This kicked up on the highway, been chasing us ever since.

Marcus Hamilton : Wish we could do somethin' for ya.

Cowboy : Ought to let it just turn me to ashes, put me out of my misery. *Cut that fence!* 21st century, I'm racing a fire to the river with a herd of cattle. And I wonder why my kids won't do this s*** for a living.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/09/25 12:02:45


Post by: Frazzled


 Easy E wrote:
I loved the scene in Hell or High Water where the rangers come across cowboys herding a bunch of cattle away from a brush fire.

The Cowboy's dialogue is hilarious, infuriating, and frustrating all at the same time.

Per IMDB:


Marcus Hamilton : [Rangers encounter cowboys driving cattle across the road before a brush fire] Hey! What you all doing? You burning this field?

Cowboy : Why in the s*** would we do that? This kicked up on the highway, been chasing us ever since.

Marcus Hamilton : Wish we could do somethin' for ya.

Cowboy : Ought to let it just turn me to ashes, put me out of my misery. *Cut that fence!* 21st century, I'm racing a fire to the river with a herd of cattle. And I wonder why my kids won't do this s*** for a living.


I believe the cowboy is actually the movie director in a sneak in scene.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/09/25 13:48:22


Post by: Kroem


Bad Times at the El Royale:

Bit of a disappointment, I was expecting more of a psychological thriller but it never really lived up to the promise of its opening few scenes.

Barbarella

A very 60's vision of the future, and thoroughly enjoyable to boot! I can see why it is such a classic.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/09/25 13:55:26


Post by: BobtheInquisitor


Barbarella is a great film to watch with a likeminded significant other. It's quite...provocative.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/09/25 14:58:15


Post by: Kroem


Haha well I'm glad you and Mrs Bob are getting into the spirit of things.

Jane Fonda does spend a hilarious amount of time dressing and undressing in the film!


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/09/25 15:07:30


Post by: Captain Joystick


Saw It: Chapter 2 last week...

Hated it.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/09/26 18:21:26


Post by: Sigur


Oh, Barbarella is good fun.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/09/26 19:01:41


Post by: Easy E


MS Gundam: Stardust

Huh. That didn't seem to add anything new, but it was fun to see some Gundams and space navy battles.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/09/29 21:34:10


Post by: Sigur


@Easy E: I have seen next to no Gundam stuff at all. Do they at this point even aim to add something new? I mean it's this huge, venerable universe (or is it a genre by now?), and people would burn anybody who changes something about it at the stake?


Well, i haven't really watched any films lately I have to admit. Unusual, because I try to watch those rather than tv shows, but somehow I thought it was time to catch up on Deep Space 9 in full. It's good. Up to now I only ever watched single episodes.

I also watched the second season of Disenchanted. I defended the first season, because it was OK and entertaining with a nice idea here and there. The second season annoyed me more than anything else to be honest. Especially the last two episodes. For a thing that's supposed to tell a serialized story (a problem with all too many shows these days I think), this just feel cluttered, unfocussed and messy. Reeks of Netflix production. If it's gotta be a Netflix thing, I'd rather watch Glow again.

Speaking of which, I also watched a bit over a season of Jack Whitehall's Travels with my Father, after a friend of mine suggested it. I'm not a big fan of Jack Whitehall. The show is somewhat entertaining, but the show's about ONE joke and it wears thin, especially during the Europe trip. Just made me wanna watch Top Gear specials. Which by the way come across much more authentic and less scripted than that show, and that's saying something.

I also watched the first episode of the new season of South Park last night. For a while now, South Park's become really depressing, but it's painfully sharply on point.

So yeah. Sorry for talking about tv shows, because this isn't the thread for it, but DS9 is basically the reason why I don't watch many films lately.



Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/09/30 15:25:19


Post by: Easy E


 Sigur wrote:
@Easy E: I have seen next to no Gundam stuff at all. Do they at this point even aim to add something new? I mean it's this huge, venerable universe (or is it a genre by now?), and people would burn anybody who changes something about it at the stake?



No it is definitely a genre......

I say they didn;t try to add anything new, because it felt like (even to a relative know-nothing like me) that the plot had all been "done before" in the Gundam franchise.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/10/04 18:03:00


Post by: Sigur


Speaking of Japanese animaltion films.... here's three I watched yesterday. A German tv channel ran a special and ran Studio Ghibli films all day.

Howl's Moving Castle (2005)

A witch turns a young girl into an old woman. She enters the services of an eccentric (and very pretty) magician as a cleaning woman.

The plot is meandering weirdly. To be honest I probably couldn't give a synopsis on all the things that happen and why. And I've seen the film at least five times by now. However, it's brilliant. It's heart-wrenchingly beautiful. While I was watching it I asked myself if it's overly divisive in terms of emotion, but couldn't see where. It's just beautiful to watch, it's beautiful to look at, it's beautiful to listen to. Here's the thing - Studio Ghibli films make me cry. Every single time. And out of all of them this one does it the most for some reason. The way the old lady turns young again and old again during scenes is subtle, and is just such a clever and nice way to display how she feels. Howl (or Hauro in the original Japanese and German dubbed versions) is a greatly entertaining character. Very aloof and out of grasp, and halfway through the film he actually gets a character, and it's a brilliant turn. The whole mythos behind the film is, as always with Ghibli films, fascinating while being light-hearted. It's a thing that's very much lacking in most other modern fantasy things - made top-heavy, static and overwritten with explanations and that eagerness to please "sense".

Must Watch. It's brilliant. It's kinda like the Jackie Brown of Ghibli films. Often overlooked, but might turn into my favourite of the whole lot. The German dub works really well. Don't know about the English one, but I hope it's good.


My Neighbor Totoro (1988)

THE Ghibli classic. A story about two sisters, 8-ish and 4 years old, moving into a new house with their father in the country. The whereabouts of their mother is explained very soon as well. The girls encounter strange creatures and one bit at a time get to meet the spirit/monster/god/demon/teddy Totoro.

The less one knows about this one going in the better I think. It's a fascinating film about being a kid, the great and small tragedies of life, fantasy, dreams, nature, family, ... all that stuff. The amazing thing this film does is how it combines realism with mind-boggling fantasy. And both intertwine and overlap, and still are perfectly sensible and believable at the same time.

Granted, it's an earlier film, and especially early on you have to be able to handle the smaller girl's antics. It's not hard, but English anime dubbing has a tendency to use overly squeaky voices for girls, which I find very grating. With the German dub it was OK. Never seen it in the Japanese original.

I don't use the term lightly, but the way this film handles facts of life and very real fears and dangers along with the most fascinating and endearing fantasy creatures possible is genius.

Must Watch.



Spirited Away (2001)

Chihiro and her parents move to a new home. On their way they encounter an abandoned amusement park. Her dad explains that these popped up in the early 90s and then got shut down during the economic crisis. I love this bit, because it places the film firmly in the contemporary, which makes the shift to what happens later on all the more impactful. Her parents find a restaurant and start eating, Chihiro is scared of the place and refuses to eat. Things get weird, Chihiro runs back to her parents, only to find they they turned into pigs. The whole park seems to have changed with nightfall as more and more odd spirits appear and move towards a huge pagoda.

That one's probably the Ghibli film I've seen the most. Brilliant. Based on very basic childhood fearss, we see how Chihiro overcomes these hurdles and finds friends in this wholly alien world.

In terms of creating an alien fantasy world, this film's probably the one in which they do the best job. There is so much stuff to look at, there are so many ideas, and so on. It's just a joy to watch and from 10 minutes into the film we're fully invested in Chihiro and how the whole thing turns out for her.

Must Watch.



Princess Mononoke (1997)

Ooooh, that's a good one. Ashitaka, a boy from a tribe somewhere far off, saves their village from a demon's attack. During the fight the demon touches his arm, thus transferring to the boy. He is exiled from his village to travel far away to maybe find a cure before the demon inside kills him.


Possibly objectively (even disregarding the emotional side) the strongest Ghibli film. It's got a message, it's told in a stringent manner, it's an adult, thoughtful and beautiful film with some amazing action scenes. Even in this one, in a situation of war between various factions, Studio Ghibli manage to do that thing they do in everyone of their big films: There are no bad guys. There are standpoints, life and situations, but there are no baddies. Just one of the reasons why these films, while often feeling strange and alien, are so strong and immediate to us. Great characters, great designs of ...everything, great female characters, excellent story about technology, nature, myth, and the points where these things rub.

Must Watch.




Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/10/04 18:42:01


Post by: Turnip Jedi


seconding everything what Sigur dun said

Mononoke is most likely the best of them, but Porco Russo is my fav

also watch the last few episodes of Preacher, totally botched it, although all of S4 (bar Genesis' dad) was a gak show


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/10/05 00:35:28


Post by: Sigur


Yeah, I've never seen Porco Rosso. I gotta do that. Same with Kiki's Delivery Service.

What I have seen a bunch of years ago was Pom Poko. It feels like this one's the most Japan-specific. Not just because of the whole testicle thing. But also a lot of the themes of modern vs. traditional lifestyle and all of that. Also good film. Unique.



Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/10/07 14:47:45


Post by: Easy E


I saw the Joker film, so put something in that thread.....


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/10/07 17:32:55


Post by: greatbigtree


The Dark Tower

This was my second viewing of the film.

Summary:

A near faith-less adaptation of a 7-book series, condensed to an hour-and-a-half movie.

The movie is a post-apocalyptic modern western, in which the protagonist is the last of the Gunslingers. Part politician,part judiciary, the gunslingers were the ruling class tasked with maintaining law and order as well. Frontier justice was the order of the day. The movie shifts between a post apocalyptic future and modern day Earth, across alternate realities.

A sorcerer acts as the key antagonist, attempting to destroy the Dark Tower, the structure responsible for holding back Cosmic Horror from destroying reality. This is accomplished by harnessing the psychic energy of children collected through space, time, and alternate universes to fire destructive psychic projectiles at the tower.

That’s a lot to cram into an hour and a half, coupled with an existing mythos to draw from and a seeming desire to set up a sequel while eliminating one of the key antagonists that drives the book series.

Analysis:

In viewing the film for a second time, I wasn’t coloured by counting the ways my expectations from the books weren’t being met. Instead, it viewed much like a superhero movie. The protagonist Roland has supernatural weapon handling skills, and (unexplained) supernatural healing. The secondary protagonist, Jake, has psychic powers in “The Shine” that are sought by the Antagonist Walter that is himself a sort of sorcerer. All with the fate of the multiverse at stake.

By ignoring the lack of connection to the source material, the movie has solid performances. Roland is stiff, but that suits the character he’s based on. Walter’s casual sadism and “charm” is also well played.

The movie is enjoyable when viewed as a simple superhero movie. It’s not great by any means, but a decent movie that touches on the source material in a somewhat interesting way. I’d say the film’s greatest crime is failing to explain Walter’s motivation as anything other than being a “bad guy” that wants to destroy the multiverse.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/10/14 12:39:30


Post by: Frazzled


Little Monsters (Hulu and small release)
Small Budget Australian film about a loser who takes his sister's kid to school and ends up on a field trip (because he has the hots for the elementary school teacher) to a kids animal park. Park is located near a US base which has a Zombie outbreak. In contrast to most movies the military is competent and quickly contains the problem. Unfortunately a bunch of zombies are drawn to the kid's park and the military to bomb it, making the kids having to get out on a clock.

Loved it. Its basically a kids zombie movie except there's a truckload of Aussie profanity in it. Wife fell asleep but Rodney gave it two and half paws up (so that I would rub his belly through the movie).


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/10/15 14:53:10


Post by: Easy E


Christopher Robin

This was a great movie about modern men needing to stay connected to their imaginative and child-like world of wonde rin order to properly function in modern society....

.... and then the last 30-40 minutes was a total studio hack job to make is "mainstream" enough. Honestly, the movie easily should have needed with Robin getting his friends back, and then a short epilogue.

Instead, we get a chase sequence, a come-uppance scene, comedy moment, and a touching father-daughter moment to create closure. What a desperate attempt to make a very touching and messaged movie mainstream. Just sad really how little the producers of the film thought about the general audience.

Anyway, Ewan McGregor does fine job in the title roll. Pooh and company deliver the goods. Hayley Atwell is given nothing to do, except carry a bunch of stuffed toys around the climax of the film..... wasted.

If you watch it, turn it off after Robin and Pooh come to terms. That is where is should have ended anyway and the rest is a boring chore.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/10/16 14:07:56


Post by: Ratius


Attempted to watch In the Long Grass last night on Nflix. Dire stuff, got up to the point where the dad goes on a ramble about the black rock thing and simply hit the power off button.
Avoid at all costs.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/10/16 18:22:01


Post by: Easy E


Bedtime Stories

This is an Adam Sandler film... from Disney. Let that sink in for a moment.

This movie had a ton of star talent attached to it, I recognize Lucy Lawless, Guy Pierce, Courtney Cox, Russel Brand, and so many more well-known performers.... how?

A by-the-numbers wish fulfillment movie. Not that funny with some VERY Adam Sandler-esque jokes at some points.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/10/28 20:02:55


Post by: Easy E


Malificent II: Mistress of Evil

While the first one felt like a cheap LoTR and Narnia rip-off, this one feels more like super-hero flick in the vein of Avengers: Endgame. Not nearly as fulfilling though.

This movie is beautifully shot, and the scenes in the fortress of the Dark Fae are really well-done cinematically, especially when Maleficent wakes from her trip. It was like something off a deviant really good art emo-page!

In the end, lessons are learned! Plus Michelle Pfeifer is having a ball and it was fun to see Warwick Davis, even if his character makes no sense!


Dead in a Week
A suicidal man meets a hitman who he pays to kill him within a week. Hi-jinks ensue.

This was actually a fairly dark and fun British comedy.



Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/10/28 20:23:57


Post by: Voss


 Sigur wrote:
@Easy E: I have seen next to no Gundam stuff at all. Do they at this point even aim to add something new? I mean it's this huge, venerable universe (or is it a genre by now?), and people would burn anybody who changes something about it at the stake?

Yes. Gundam fans tend towards crazy fanatical.
Even the ones who skip all the talking (largely endless exposition about revenge and why determined pacifists are justifying killing loads of people) to watch giant robot fights.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/10/28 20:35:28


Post by: Mad Doc Grotsnik


Long running and frankly variable of late tale of future threat and man’s idiot hubris pays off.

Yes, Terminator Dark Fate.

It’s not perfect, but it is good!


Automatically Appended Next Post:
 Easy E wrote:
Bedtime Stories

This is an Adam Sandler film... from Disney. Let that sink in for a moment.

This movie had a ton of star talent attached to it, I recognize Lucy Lawless, Guy Pierce, Courtney Cox, Russel Brand, and so many more well-known performers.... how?

A by-the-numbers wish fulfillment movie. Not that funny with some VERY Adam Sandler-esque jokes at some points.


Other than the first two, I feel you’re stretching the definition of ‘star’ some.

Russel Effing Brand? Reason enough to avoid like the plague.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/10/28 23:02:11


Post by: greatbigtree


Sound & Fury (on Netflix)

This movie is more like a series of closely linked music videos in sequence. The music ranges from a sort of Guitar-Heavy electronic, to more mellow folk-rock, to a dance music segment... its a real trip. Since I watched it the first time, I’ve thrown it on for background music a couple of times. Watch past the start of the credits, there’s more movie after that.

Some of the songs are quite catchy, like listening to an album for 45 minutes. If you’re old enough to remember music videos as something you watched on TV, not YouTube, then you might remember Daft Punk had a series of linked music videos about blue aliens that were also rockstars?

The premise of linked music videos is what I’m getting at.

The picture-part of the movie tells a tale of revenge. The characters “Business and Pleasure” come to a remote temple where they kill everyone except the Samurai Master, who then swears revenge and to rescue his captured daughter. Oh, and it’s a dystopian future? Pretty standard Anime stuff. There are also a couple of side stories, and a section about the end of civilization from a first-person perspective.

It’s really neat. I’d recommend it even if you’re not an “anime” fan, just for the music.

If you’d like a sample, go to YouTube and search...

Sturgill Simpson - Sing Along

NSFW WARNING - Brief flashes of cartoon boobies. This is a section of the movie, as it plays. It’s one of the electronic-rock sections. If you dig it, you’ll probably like the rest.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/10/28 23:22:17


Post by: Argive


I have not had time to go through the entire thread so apologies if I have repeated some stuff people have already said.

Spoiler:
 greatbigtree wrote:
The Dark Tower

This was my second viewing of the film.

Summary:

A near faith-less adaptation of a 7-book series, condensed to an hour-and-a-half movie.

The movie is a post-apocalyptic modern western, in which the protagonist is the last of the Gunslingers. Part politician,part judiciary, the gunslingers were the ruling class tasked with maintaining law and order as well. Frontier justice was the order of the day. The movie shifts between a post apocalyptic future and modern day Earth, across alternate realities.

A sorcerer acts as the key antagonist, attempting to destroy the Dark Tower, the structure responsible for holding back Cosmic Horror from destroying reality. This is accomplished by harnessing the psychic energy of children collected through space, time, and alternate universes to fire destructive psychic projectiles at the tower.

That’s a lot to cram into an hour and a half, coupled with an existing mythos to draw from and a seeming desire to set up a sequel while eliminating one of the key antagonists that drives the book series.

Analysis:

In viewing the film for a second time, I wasn’t coloured by counting the ways my expectations from the books weren’t being met. Instead, it viewed much like a superhero movie. The protagonist Roland has supernatural weapon handling skills, and (unexplained) supernatural healing. The secondary protagonist, Jake, has psychic powers in “The Shine” that are sought by the Antagonist Walter that is himself a sort of sorcerer. All with the fate of the multiverse at stake.

By ignoring the lack of connection to the source material, the movie has solid performances. Roland is stiff, but that suits the character he’s based on. Walter’s casual sadism and “charm” is also well played.

The movie is enjoyable when viewed as a simple superhero movie. It’s not great by any means, but a decent movie that touches on the source material in a somewhat interesting way. I’d say the film’s greatest crime is failing to explain Walter’s motivation as anything other than being a “bad guy” that wants to destroy the multiverse.


So many people slept on this movie!
I was very disappointed that by the time I got around to watching it in cinema (not even 2 weeks after premiere) they already stopped screening it. Watched it as soon as it was available and me and my friend loved it. Matthew Mcconaughey's acting the villain was suberb!!! The best villany I have seen in a very very long time, probably since Heath Ledgers joker...! That man deserved an Oscar. Idris Elba is just boss at everything he does obviously, goes without saying. Highly recommend this film.

For me a great hidden animation gem:

"The red turtle". Its indescribably hunting and I'm getting goose bumps just remembering it. Couple things: Its a non-spoken animation film. Beautifully depicts mans journey through life. I mean its honestly impossible to describe. Prepper to have your mind blown. I cannot describe what an absolute master piece this is in my opinion.

Another film most people I spoke to haven't seen is Alpha - Its a story about the first hunter gatherers eeking a living. Its a beautiful story of how we possibly might have tamed the first wolves. The film really shines due to excellent scenography. Its all spoken in a dead language so expect subtitles (caveat as I know some people think subtitles the devil). Extremely happy I got to see it at cinema.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/10/29 15:48:23


Post by: Elbows


Just some rapid fire catch up:

IT: Chapter 2: Crap. Just a far worse version of the first movie which was grand. Unnecessary.

Angel has Fallen: Okay for a popcorn movie. Enjoy Gerard Butler's characters in these. I think I enjoy these silly "Fallen" movies simply because they're not trying to be anything other than what they are - and that's hugely refreshing in this day and age.

Brightburn: I enjoyed this. You get exactly what it says on the tin, and while not groundbreaking has some excellent spooky scenes and some great visuals. Fun.

Avengers: Endgame: Crap. Felt like a three hour self-congratulatory circle jerk with a boring story and far too many things being addressed. I think in general "cinematic universes" are good for box offices and crap for actual film making.

Never Ending Story: Picked this up to watch with the niece/nephew. Boy it barely holds up at all...unlike a lot of films of that age. Still enjoy the premise but it's really rough around the edges. Hadn't seen it properly since I was maybe 8-9, but the kids liked it.





Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/10/30 10:50:50


Post by: Sigur


Did I watch any films recently? I know I watched Borat on Netflix. Any review of that one would be a bit of a waste of time, wouldn't it. I caught the last quarter of Borg/McEnroe, which is basically just the match. Really, really impressive filmmaking. Got the last third of Jack Reacher. I really like that film. I know it's got its flaws, but I really like the film. It's just entertaining as hedge.

Last week a German TV channel ran a bit of a Chuck Norris double feature. Very interesting, because I hadn't seen the first film ever and the second film I hadn't seen in a long time.


Black Tiger (1978)

Chuck Norris (who also produced this film) was part of a superspecial group of supersoldiers under the CIA, they were code named Black Tigers. They went to rescue POWs. After the end of the war each member of the group basically disappeared and took on civilian identities. Now somehow Chuck Norris is being followed around by a spunky reporter (late-70s Anne Archer. She's good, isn't she.) who asks questions about his past. At the same time former members of the Black Tigers are dying in mysterious ways. John T. Booker (great name for Norris' character) and the journalist travel the US to find out what's what.

I'm not the biggest fan of Chuck Norris. Amazing feats of athleticism and discipline aside, he's always struck me as kinda bland, lacking charisma and engaging acting skills. It's a bit problematic that the film (and 90% of shots in it) is solely centered around him. He does have good hair and a good moustache, that I have to admit. And the acting fits the slower, more 70s style of the film.

There isn't a whole lot of action. More dialogue, and it actually works. Also a lot about Norris' admittedly sweet car. Overall, the film has a bit of a James Bond feel to it actually. The last quarter of the film is getting a bit silly, but also very entertaining, as T.Booker gets his pal as basically a sidekick (no, it's not Jonathan Brandis, you cheeky aficionados). The ending is quite unsatisfying. It almost seems like it should have gone a bit differently (now that would have had quite some impact!), but the studio (or the producer, ehem) decided to keep it more 'safe'.

Overall though it's nicely entertaining, not the least due to the late 70s look of everything and the generally a bit hokey tone while played seriously.


Pass (if you're interested in old action films though and need a dose of 70s: Watch It. If you're a Chuck Norris fan: Must Watch. It's a classic in that niche, I hear)


Right afterwards they showed THE Chuck Norris classic (Missing in Action aside) - Invasion USA (1985)

It's a bit silly, but I kinda have to squee in joy when I see the cannon films logo and a producer credit of Golan AND Globus. By the way, watch every single documentary on Golan and Globus you can find on youtube. I greatly enjoy that stuff. Chuck Norris helped writing the screenplay as well.

The film starts with South American immigrants on a broken-down ship being more or less capsized off the shores of the US. A US coast guard ship turns up, captained by Richard Lynch, so we know that this may go unwell for the poor peeps in that boat. In this very first scene we already get a taste of how downright mean-spirited this film is.

The plot develops into an invasion (landing ships, beach, etc included) of unspecified South American terrorists onto US soil. They all jump in to trucks and drive off into the night to cause havoc and spread ...well, terror to destabilize the US within a 24 hours. Meanwhile we learn that a.) there's a Chuck Norris (Matt Hunter), living in the swamps where he chainsaws trees apart, wrestles alligators, and generally does very manly things with his man-pals "old swamp dude", a lizard and "other crusty dude". We learn that Hunter and Hames (Richard Lynch's character, who actually is Russian, but took on an anglo name, the sneaky git) have a past in that the latter always kept on doing evil terrorist things, and the former always thwarting his plans. So Hames is kinda obsessed with killing Hunter and insists that the invasion can only start once he killed him. They make sure of that in hilarious fashion. In general, there is a lot of man-portable rocket launcher action in this film.

Hames thinks Hunter's dead (spoiler: He isn't) and the terrorists gleefully invade. They dress up as policemen to terrorize The Minorities(tm), so when the real good police turn up The Minorities(tm) are angry at them. You see the sneaky ways of the terrorist here. In a less subtle move, they just blow up rich suburbs on christmas. Yup, this is a christmas film, which I absolutely didn't remember. So we learned that not only Lethal Weapon, but also Invasion USA are in fact christmas films. Good trivia.

Soon the modus operandi of the film is getting clearer: Terrorist massacre US civilians, Hunter shows up, massacres the terrorists. Slowly, but surely, Hunter (in his Mack Truck) gets the upper hand against the army of terrorists. There's also a not-so-spunky female journalist again, but other than Anne Archer she's barely a factor in the whole film. In fact, she's entirely a non-factor, but I guess they felt like they had to have a female character apart from a prostitute who shows up for about 8 seconds total. PC gone mad.
In the end the US army shows up, lures all of the terrorists into a trap and then we see about 20 minutes of US army infantry and tanks killing terrorists they surrounded prior while Hunter stalks terrorists and Hames in an office building.

This film is a blast to watch (it even has Billy Drago in a great early scene in which Richard Lynch sells drugs to Billy Drago. Just imagine that. The two most sinister dudes of the time doing shady dealings.). It gets a bit repetitive, but simply due to how insane the whole thing is right from the get-go it's hard not to watch along. Chuck Norris is just that, but all the character work and dialogue is cleverly left to the bad guys anyway.

If you're into 80s action films, Must Watch.

So this film is great fun while watching it. Looking back at it, of course it's an insane Reagan-era time capsule, filled to the brim with power- and revenge fantasies that would make Call of Duty writers blush. It's also rather mean-spirited in playing it's very, primitive emotional fiddle of baddies being bad, good thing we got Chuck Norris to kill them until finally the sluggish, centralist army is mobilized.

Seeing these films back to back really shows the difference between the 70s and 80s in Hollywood films. While being extreme examples (at least Invasion USA is), it's rather interesting to watch. Black Tiger has an individual protagonist who is damaged by his government's actions and now is further being damaged and has to fight a corrupt politician while Invasion USA basically is purely a war propaganda film during a time without the US being involved in no open wars at all. The way the baddies (an amalgamation of bogeymen of the time. 'Reds', Mexicans, drugs and to an extent the easily instrumentalized minorities on US soil) operate in that one reflects the 'new wars' which emerged at the time. All very interesting stuff.

Oh well. I just remembered I watched another film.


Alien Tornado (2012)

I usually have no interest in watching Asylum films (or similar) any more. They were fun for a while, when they did silly mockbusters, but I have little interest in shark films to begin with, nor in tornado films, and I certainly have no interest in people trying to manufacture 'cult films'. But I was at my brother's, and the film happened to be on, so we watched it for some reason.

Mysterious tornadoes turn up in the US, going for US federal institutions and areas and swallow people. Turns out aliens direct their movement. Good ol' boy, salt-of-the-earth farmer Jeff Fahey, his teenage daughter, a hilarious policeman and a lady scientist/journalist/blogger/"i used to work at that place and the boss owes me a favour" deus ex machina person with a surgically altered face have to save the world.

It's cheap spank. Don't watch. It's not that it's entirely without entertainment factors. The German dub for instance is also very cheap. That adds to the thing. The acting is prettty bad (apart from Fahey of course), the very old bad guy is overacting and generally weird. The effects are really bad. But then again - bad practical effects are cool and fun. Bad CGI effects are just crap. So yeah, don't watch it.




It's Halloweensy times, so let's talk about our favourite horror films, shall we. In this case I'll restrict myself to fun films I'll readily watch, show to friends, have on in the background at a party and so on.
I guess the go-tos would be

Evil Dead 2 (of course the first one's fun as well, a milestone, and to be watched, but compared to the quasi-remake that is the sequel it's a bit less entertaining and the improved effects do help)
Army of Darkness (obviously)
Fright Night (I hear that the second one's got a lot of fans as well, but I Haven't seen it in ages)
Waxworks (I'd really like to watch that one again. I remember it being good fun once it got going proper)
Seed of Chucky (yeah, yeah. But I just enjoy that film for its absurdity and for Jennifer Tilly)
Dawn of the Dead (the remake)
Trick R Treat
Creepshow (the horror anthology film classic)
Blood Diner

Honorable mentions for: Monster House (for the kids, but I enjoy it too), Comedy of Horrors (because Vincent Price and Peter Lorre. In fact, watch all of Corman's Poe films.) and Santa's Slay (the Bill Goldberg one. Entertainment value aside, one of the main reasons why I like that film is the insane mythology they made up to justify the going-ons.)


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/10/30 14:31:45


Post by: Easy E


Price's House on Haunted Hill
The Undertaker and his Pals
Dementia 13
Army of Darkness
Dead Alive- The Peter Jackson one with the Sumatran Rat Monkey
Creepshow
Omega Man
I Bury the Living


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/11/02 15:18:22


Post by: Elbows


Sicario: Day of the Soldado: Still an excellent little franchise. While not as good as the first film, there are still a lot of elements which are uncomfortably accurate (it happens to take place where I used to work, so it's accuracy is appreciated)

Das Boot: I mean, what can you say? This is legendary, and remains so. I watched my preferred version (the 209 minute directors cut). There are no other submarine movies that can touch it.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/11/02 23:12:10


Post by: greatbigtree


Alien: Covenant.

I wanted to like this movie sooooo badly. And I did, right up to the clearly-breaking-quarantine by bringing sicky-McGee onto the lander and all the ensuing blatant stupidity that lead to the lander exploding.

And they can’t handle a single alien, all armed with assault rifles? Then robot-two takes them to an obvious torture-dungeon surrounded by a thousand corpses frozen in terror.

And everyone’s like, “Yeah, I’ll follow you into the basement after you completely disregarded the corpse of my crew person and yelled at me for killing the monster that *trusts* you. Look into this egg sack with a squirmy thing inside? Sure! Is my face close enough to the egg sack, obviously psychopathic robot-two?”

Oh, and then robot-two steals the colony ship to make a couple thousand alien hybrids.

Analysis: It took a descent start to a movie, and then lobotomized every character so they could do the blatantly moronic thing that would get them killed.

I’m angry that they took a group of interesting characters, and then cast the spell of *dumbfuckery* all over them. You can physically feel the point of the movie where it turns from sci-fi to a slasher flick. Dumb teens sneaking of for murder-sex. Go into the torture dungeon with the obvious bad guy. Oh, this creepy loner likes to dissect things? You should just tie yourself to the table and save us all the misery. Just infuriating levels of idiocy were required to make the plot “work”.

Anyhow, if you shut the movie off after the second guy steps on a spore mine and you just imagine how you want the movie to end, you’ll be happier. So watch to that point and *SHUT IT DOWN*.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/11/03 21:17:17


Post by: hotsauceman1


Transylvania 6-5000
I saw this and i saw it had Jeff Goldblum. then i saw the disparity in rating of critics vs Audiences and i though to give it a whirl.
I laughed my ass off so much, such visual gags that you wouldnt notice and a blend of old humor i kinda missed.
I will tie everyone down tommorow night and make gamers watch it.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/11/04 17:22:53


Post by: Easy E


So, I watched a couple of classics for Halloween....

Black Sunday
Way better than the very similar Black Sabbath with Barbara Steele. This one was done by Mario Bava, and even though it is Black and White he really knows how to shoot a film. This thing is full of great atmosphere and is great fun.

Last Man on Earth
Such a nice little film. Price is great and it really subverts so many or the "norms" of 50's society and films. So much fun. The zombies are slow, weak, and uncoordinated and are very little threat to the main character, yet the horror and threat is this film are real. I enjoy this movie so much.

The House on Haunted Hill
The pacing of this film is very slow and talky. It is not scary at all, yet I still love it. The dialogue is whip crack smart and I just love the little jabs and barbs between husband and wife. Price rules in this film. A love listening to this movie.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/11/05 14:07:58


Post by: Sigur


 hotsauceman1 wrote:
Transylvania 6-5000
I saw this and i saw it had Jeff Goldblum. then i saw the disparity in rating of critics vs Audiences and i though to give it a whirl.
I laughed my ass off so much, such visual gags that you wouldnt notice and a blend of old humor i kinda missed.
I will tie everyone down tommorow night and make gamers watch it.


Oh, I caught that one on TV one time, but couldn't watch much of it. Certainly has a 'cult film' vibe to it though.

@Easy E: That's a really nice selection of films there.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/11/05 14:50:33


Post by: Elbows


Executive Decision: Nothing special, but watching non-agenda films from the 90's is pretty damn refreshing. And Kurt Russell, so how can you go wrong?


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/11/05 16:26:21


Post by: Easy E


The Matrix

I saw this for the first time in a long time.

Man, it holds up really well. Every bit of dialogue and scene helps move the Campbellian Hero Journey and the plot/premise of the movie.

It is basically a fairy tale with a veneer of cyberpunk layered over it. However, it was still riveting and exciting to watch.



Sidenote:
I was trying to remember what the marketing and hyper were like around this movie at the time. I just recall the trailers hyping up the idea of "No one can be told what the Matrix is, it must be seen." and no one really knew what the film was going to be about. It is hard to capture that now since it was such a hit. Plus, the internet was still a young thing and all of these computer based concepts were still new to people at the time. It was a time capsule in a sense.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/11/05 17:40:06


Post by: BobtheInquisitor


 Elbows wrote:
Executive Decision: Nothing special, but watching non-agenda films from the 90's is pretty damn refreshing. And Kurt Russell, so how can you go wrong?


This film has gone down in legend due to it's perfect handling of star Steven Seagal.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/11/05 18:39:22


Post by: greatbigtree


I don't recall the scene where they put him in a garbage can, lit it on fire, then rolled it down a hill... but my memory of that era isn't perfect.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/11/06 16:59:12


Post by: Easy E


Sherlock Holmes

A buddy cop movie with a Sherlock Holmes veneer pulled over it. They also dipped their toe in the From Hell genre with the villain and Not-Freemasons added in for fun.

Jude Law and Robert Downey Jr. have pretty good chemistry and I was entertained. The Ms. Adler character needed a bit of work, but the Villain was suitably menacing.

I can see why there was a sequel and I wanted to see it after watching this one.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/11/07 04:50:10


Post by: Elbows


While obviously over the top in a Guy Ritchie fashion, they were the first ones to actually take note of the drug-addled maniac that Sherlock is in the books. That element had been far too long dormant in almost every tight-lipped, upper-crust version of Sherlock portrayed on film in the last 20-30 years. While the movie is just a fun Hollywood explode-em style piece...they did the character a bit of justice.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/11/11 21:22:19


Post by: Easy E


The Terror

This was the one with Boris Karloff and Jack Nicholson ny AIP. Legend has it that this was made in two days by Roger Corman between shooting two other movies and re-using sets and costumes. Overall, that bit of backstory about the film is more exciting than the movie.

Nicholson played the most unconvincing French cavalry officer of the Napoleonic Wars I have ever seen. I believe it was circa 1806 based on dialogue and he a LT. from the 5th Chasseurs regiment. They did get some green and red in uniform which made it much more accurate than I ever expected.

Anyway, the LT gets separated from his unit and ends up on the cost somewhere in Austria maybe? He comes across a girl. She disappears into the waves. Later, he is found by a witch and her mute/not-mute helper. He then goes to the castle and rudely barges his way in and makes himself at home with the local Baron. Stuff happens, there are strange goings on, nothing is scary, gaslighting occurs, and the girl may or may not be a real, live woman.

Impertinent question: Why would you build a crypt that you could flood with a hatch to the ocean?


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/11/12 15:21:47


Post by: Easy E


One of my favorite movies is Undercover Brother. I enjoy it more than Austin Powers, which is a similar style. However, I understand that it is not for everyone's taste.

I was super-excited to see an Undercover Brother 2 starring Michael Jai White from [b]Black Dynamite{/b] fame! It was a big surprised and I immediately cleared my calendar and watched it.

The people who made this movie did their homework on the original. They had the car, the entrance to the Brotherhood, and other details from the first movie down. The jokes are not as solid, and I think there were some missed opportunities, but Michael Jai White makes a way better Undercover Brother! It also has Barry Bostwick from Spin City as The Man! I fund this amusing. The ending is also funny, but a bit abrupt and flat. it really needed a dance-off like the first one.

They make a few references to modern politics, but considering what they could have done; they were pretty tame. They also make a ton of fun about being "Woke", gentrification, and hipsters. One of the main villains is called Man Bun.

I was amused, but it is not as solid as the first one. The way it ended, it almost felt like a pilot for a TV show.... which would be epic!

@Sigur- I think you would also enjoy this film.....



Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/11/12 20:29:53


Post by: Sigur


*is summoned*

I've watched several of the Corman films of that time period, but somehow I think I never watched the Terror. Maybe because I was too obsessed with watching all the Vincent Price ones. Sounds good though.


As for Untercover Brother- I've seen it, and I enjoyed it a lot as well. Never knew of the sequel. Maybe I catch it at some point! Thanks for the suggestion.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/11/12 20:53:48


Post by: Easy E


 Sigur wrote:
*is summoned*

I've watched several of the Corman films of that time period, but somehow I think I never watched the Terror. Maybe because I was too obsessed with watching all the Vincent Price ones. Sounds good though.


As for Untercover Brother- I've seen it, and I enjoyed it a lot as well. Never knew of the sequel. Maybe I catch it at some point! Thanks for the suggestion.


The Terror is not good.

You might enjoy Undercover Brother 2 better.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/11/13 05:18:31


Post by: greatbigtree


Hellboy: The New One

Summary: Hellboy goes to Europe, only to find that everyone is trying to kill him. Some pretty poor CGI action sequences occur in an almost random order as the protagonist is thrown from scene to scene by the whims of a person cranked out of their head. In one sequence dropped out of an elevator to fight a splicer, only to then literally drop into the next scene when the splicer kicks him out.

Analysis: Damn, I like Hellboy. I like the actors. The dialogue is atrocious. The plot is perhaps the worst case of protagonist without agency I’ve ever witnessed. I can’t recall a single change of scene prompted by a decision of the character. Instead, Hellboy and crew are told, “Go here and don’t die. Now go here, and don’t die. You were taking an elevator up? Now you’re going down. Because a splicer wants your eye. And now you’re digging up Merlin’s bones because your friend that you forgot about for 20 years is suddenly your bestie and you’re King Arthur’s final decendant. Ever heard of Excalibur? All yours, Red. But now you... damn, this movie is just a bunch of random ideas for a D&D campaign, put in a bowl and then you draw one idea after the other and that’s what the heroes encounter when the walk through the next door.

I wanted to know. I set my expectations low, but this isn’t even really a story so much as ideas that were filmed and put after the last idea. Just awful.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/11/13 06:01:43


Post by: Elbows


Willow: Love this old chestnut. Simple, good fun, cool practical effects. A jubilant and entertaining Val Kilmer...gorgeous red-head villainess What's not to like?

Friday the 13th (2008?): Not even sure when this came out, but it's one of the newer revamps. Overall, while not particularly scary it's a great generic slasher film. Teens, beer, boobs, and blood.

Midway: A complete C+/B- of a popcorn Hollywood WW2 flick. Drowning in tropes and comical one-liners...but worth some of the CGI for the ships and planes (ignoring the combat which is waaaaaay over-done and poorly designed). Funded by a couple of Chinese companies it's surprisingly even-keeled. It does feel like a movie from 2005 though, something I've found with a lot of Chines-driven cinema. This movie is worth missing, unless you're bored (as I was at noon the other day).



Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/11/13 08:29:11


Post by: Mad Doc Grotsnik


 Easy E wrote:
It also has Barry Bostwick from Spin City as The Man!



Think you'll find it's Barry Bostwick from The Rocky Horror Picture Show




Automatically Appended Next Post:
The Skull

Peter Cushing buys the skull of the Marquis De Sade, against Sir Christopher Lee's advice.

Should've listened to Chris, decent if low budget and restrained horror ensues.

Definitely worth checking out, especially for fans of Amicus and Hammer Studios.

Speaking of Amicus, really should watch all my portmanteaus again. Cracking little series of films.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/11/14 02:09:51


Post by: Nightlord1987


Re-watching Boardwalk Empire.

Basically Sopranos/The Wire but set in the 1930s. If you like Scorsese movies, this is the show for you.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/11/14 03:31:42


Post by: Easy E


 Mad Doc Grotsnik wrote:
 Easy E wrote:
It also has Barry Bostwick from Spin City as The Man!



Think you'll find it's Barry Bostwick from The Rocky Horror Picture Show




Automatically Appended Next Post:
The Skull

Peter Cushing buys the skull of the Marquis De Sade, against Sir Christopher Lee's advice.

Should've listened to Chris, decent if low budget and restrained horror ensues.

Definitely worth checking out, especially for fans of Amicus and Hammer Studios.

Speaking of Amicus, really should watch all my portmanteaus again. Cracking little series of films.


This seems up my alley. I will see if I can track it down to watch.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/11/14 10:03:42


Post by: Sigur


Oh yes, simply based on the premise, The Skull sounds like a load of fun.

Love Willow. Possibly Val Kilmer's best performance? Anybody who isn't sure about him as an actor has to watch Willow.


Blue Velvet (1986)

Boy returns home from collage for a few days, finds a cut-off ear, meets girl, goes to night club with her, a singer lady shows up (boy gets rather obsessed with her), she seems to be involved in some dark going-ons, boy decides to investigate and is pulled into a dark world going on.

If you watch just ONE David Lynch film, this probably is the one to watch (but do watch more of his). Haunting performances, and haunting in general. Nobody keeps you guessing like Lynch, while making the trip down the rabbit hole feel quite so interesting and entertaining, especially so in Blue Velvet. Nowadays the whole "there's a nasty underbelly to US suburb's!" thing is well played out these days. However, Blue Velvet still does it best. Especially watching it for the first time I remember the whole thing being deeply unsettling. Because, again, with Lynch's films you never quite know what's gonna happen next. Positively dream/nightmare-like feeling.

Watch It.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/11/14 11:05:44


Post by: Mad Doc Grotsnik


The Skull is available on Amazon Prime, at least in the UK.

£4.49, worth every penny.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/11/14 22:06:37


Post by: BobtheInquisitor


Vibes—Jeff Goldblum, Cyndi Lauper, and Peter Faulk in a comedy about a pair of psychics conned into searching for the lost city of gold. It’s not laugh out loud funny, but it is very charming with some clever moments and a great ending. It’ll change the way you think about glowing pyramids.

On a related note: anyone remember Second Sight starring John Loroquette and Bronson Pinchot? Did that hold up?


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/11/14 22:47:33


Post by: Mad Doc Grotsnik


Vice Versa

A film featuring Fred Savage and Judge Reinhold. Also a film I saw on holiday with my dear old Daddykins in the cinema in Harrogate, where we were holidaying.

Granted, objectively is a pretty weak film. It’s enjoyable, but as a body swap concept, all been done better.

Yet for me it’s special. See, Daddykins was always the bread winner of the house. And that placed certain demands on his time.

It’s not until relatively ( last few months, with Mumsy’s passing) that I’ve had to confront this thing, whatever it is.

I’ve never not loved my Dad, but I was always closer to Mum. And there are good societal reasons for that.

But after Mum passed away, I realised there’s a bit of a gulf between Dear Old Daddykins and I. And this particular movie is a solid, if very early memory, of Father and Son bonding.

K. I’m waffling. And a wee bit drunk. But I hope I’ve sketched out why an objectively ropey movie means a lot to me. And on reflection, always has.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/11/15 12:33:23


Post by: Sigur


@Bobhelminquisitor: That's another one I've seen the beginning of! (the Lauper/Goldblum psychic one) From what I saw I think that I'll agree with you. Seemed very charming.

@Mad Doc Grotsnik: Oh, that's nice. Let's be honest, in many, many films the context in which we watch the film makes a huge part of what we think of it. Never heard of that film, to be honest, but just judging from the cast I wasn't surprised when I read what year it was released in. I'm not a huge fan of the bodyswap films (well, apart from All of Me, the Steve Martin one). Despite my faith in Community having taken a big hit last year, I think that the Freaky Friday episode is great in almost any regard and to me kinda covers the genre.



Errr.... have I seen anything... I watched Hot Fuzz again, which is slowly, slowly growing on me, but I still think that Shaun of the Dead and End of the World are still leagues ahead. I caught the end of The Goonies. Never seen that one before, because it's one of those films which are a big thing in the US, but not really over here. Probably because it's so out there. Not sure. Josh Brolin in his teens already was much more rugged and manly than I'll ever be.

Last night I realized that Friends is finally off Netflix. Which sucks.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/11/15 18:40:56


Post by: Mad Doc Grotsnik


Bloodbath at The House of Death

Spoof horror in a Hammer style.

It’s got Kenny Everett and Vincent Price. And that should tell you all you need to know!


Automatically Appended Next Post:
Sample scene. Mild language.




Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/11/17 09:04:13


Post by: Sigur


Boiling Point (1993)

Not sure i've seen that one before. It's basically about a baddie (Dennis Hopper) and his pal Viggo Mortensen working on some heists, while Wesley Snipes and a whole gang of "That guy"s are after them. AND it's based on a true story!
But still, it's entertaining es heck. Mortensen is scary. Hopper is mesmerizing and greatly entertaining to watch (add the fact that I'd just watched Blue Velvet a few days ago. Weird to see him as a basically good-natured, ageing rascal.). I'm pretty sure he was high and/or drunk throughout the whole thing. Snipes is righteous.

Watch It, if you're old like me and find the look of film grain and early 90s things as soothing as I do.


Beyond Skyline (2017)

It's the sequel to the 2010 film Skyline! You know, from that time when for a short while a few alien invasion films were released. Afterwards they showed Skyline of which we watched the beginning. It features Turk from Scrubs and his scrappy band of rich Hollywood people (there's a slight hint of meta humour in there in the beginning, but in general it's played straight, which is nice). Aliens invade and turn people crazy with blue lights. It's not bad. Well, it's not good either, but it's watchable.

Aaaaaanyway, the sequel we only got into about halfway through (watching TV is great. With streaming you basically only watch the stuff you already like and every now and then force you to watch something of which you know it's good. On a tiny screen. With headphones. As nobody intended.). Bunch of people in the Far East sitting in the jungle, going somewhere while explaining the lore of the whole thing to each other around a campfire. HOWEVER, then the aliens appear. And they actually look really good. I didn't expect that. I won't tell much more about the film, but the climax is something to be seen. Feels like a French action film from like 20 years ago, when the grittiness and down-to-earth-ness is shed, and insanity erupts in action scenes.

It's watchable. The whole franchise (chuckle) is. In general, Pass. If you're curious - Watch it. Which is a horrible bottom line to a review.


Air America (1990)

Mel Gibson and Robert Downey Jr. work for Air America, one of the cover-up companies run by the CIA to smuggle drugs and guns across South-East Asia during the Vietnam war.

It's an odd film, that one. It's bascially a buddy comedy about a very grim topic. The thing's been in development for quite a few years, and it was rather expensive at the time. The ending was reshot, that much I know. I assume that during the development process it got watered down a lot and rewritten a bunch of times. The whole film seems kinda uneven in terms of pacing and story in general. There are some funny bits, mostly courtesy of Mel Gibson's character. And I guess most people have watched it at some point, but it's really not very good, despite all the star power and good production.

Fun fact: this one got pulled rather quickly from German cinemas after the outbreak of the Gulf War.

Pass.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/11/17 13:54:06


Post by: Mad Doc Grotsnik


Jumanji; Welcome to the Jungle

Part genuine sequel, part reworking. But utterly charming, giving various actors a bit of a challenge.

Also, it’s got Karen Gillan in it, so that’s +4 Doc’s right there.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/11/17 23:50:36


Post by: Sigur


yeah, I heard it's pretty good. Good to have it confirmed from yet another source.


Disaster Artist (2018)

James Franco's very own project for displaying an interpretation of how the famous film The Room came to be. He's got the accent down, that's for sure. He looks too young though. But anyway. Everybody knows The Room. If not, watch it.

Overall this is a fun film and they do well in keeping the mystery about Tommy Wiseau. It's more or less told via the eyes of his best friend and co-star of the film. The best thing of course is watching them produce scenes from The Room (in the very end there's like 6 more minutes of a side by side comparison of the Disaster Artist's version of the scenes and the originals. The attention to detail is stunning.

There are some things I didn't quite like. The music was oppressive, with a mix of period music and that horrible "US indie darling film inspirational stock music". Also - I don't need to see ALL of James Franco's friends. I have this very ambivalent feeling about Alison Brie. Didn't much care for her in Community, love her in GLOW, didn't care much for her in this film. Rather often throughout the film someone like her or Seth Rogen pop up and you think "oh, here's Seth Rogen", not a character. This gets especially weird when the main character and his girlfriend Alison Brie meet Brian Cranston in a café and talk. Brian Cranston plays himself, Brie plays a character in the film, but she seems as "hollywood star" as Cranston does in the scene. It's odd. In general this also makes the film feel a bit odd, in that it has a slight air of "successful people getting together to poke fun at someone who hasn't made it". Of course the film's also very affectionate towards the whole production of The Room, but there's also an appropriate amount of fun poking. Which is a bit odd. It's like hip Hollywood people getting together for a laugh to play out a really important day in your life.

Despite all my nitpicking, the film's alright. It's nice. It's NOWHERE as good as Ed Wood of course (with which it gets compared to often, due to obvious reasons), but a solid effort.
Watch It, if you're interested in The Room.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/11/18 22:10:52


Post by: Easy E


Nosferatu

The old, silent, clack and White film. Would you believe I have previously watched this movie twice before! What is a third time between friends.

Count Orloff is sinister and other worldly, the direction with shadows is great. The story is straight Bram Stoker, but the Vampire bight is covered by a plague sweeping the land. Overall, I like many of the scenes in this film.

This is not to everyone's taste, but I like it!


Casablanca

This movie is considered a classic and I had never seen it before. I got to see it on the big screen in a movie theater.

I can see why it is so beloved. The action is mostly dialogue driven, and as I get older I am even more drawn to this type of screen play. The movie is filled with sub-text, innuendo, and foreshadowing. It is a great metaphor for America's entry into the war.





Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/11/19 12:36:35


Post by: Sigur


Revisiting the classics, I see.

We watched Nosferatu in school. Not sure I've watched it since. BUT last month I watched a documentary on horror films in which they showed miniature recreations of the sets they filmed Dr.Caligari in. It's really interesting to see to what lengths they went to paint false shadows, slanted walls, etc. Really interesting stuff.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/11/21 14:26:26


Post by: Easy E


Dr. Caligari is interestng because the sets and set-ups are so unusual. To modern eyes they look cartoonish and almost amateurish, but they were pretty ground breaking and surreal for the time.

Another silent film that was pushing the ground work of the medium.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/11/21 21:50:56


Post by: Elbows


Ford v. Ferrari: Good movie. Close to great. Nice acting, nice writing, great film of the cars (something that Rush failed to deliver). It's more a film about Miles than it is about the entire story, though it encompasses it well enough. Doesn't pull many punches. It does suffer a bit making the Ferrari company/team a little too much like twirling-moustachioed evil doers. I'm sure it was a budget consideration, but the story doesn't focus nearly enough on the other cars from the teams during the race. If anything though, it does a great job of showcasing the spirit and mentality of a true car guy, a true driver. Best racing film in a long time for me.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/11/25 00:07:03


Post by: Sigur


I heard good things about the car film! Sounds good.


Earlier today I heard an amazing thing. On Star Wars VII (the first of the new-new ones) they originally planned to have Mr.Driver's character without the helmet throughout. Only lateron they decided to make his face some sort of reveal one hour in, so they edited the helmet onto his head for the first hour of the film. It's all CG. Craziness.

Me, I haven't watched any films the past days (apart from re-watching Shaun of the Dead [brilliant] and about the first half of the new-ish Peanuts film. Which is really charming.). Somehow also stopped watching DS9 and instead am back on the Frasier train. I'm huge on Frasier, Seinfeld and Friends, and I can't quite decide which one out of them is the best. I suspect it's Frasier, but ask me again when I watch the other ones again. :p


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/11/25 03:00:12


Post by: BobtheInquisitor


I think that hour of CGI Kylo helmet was animated by the same company who digitally added the "Gullible" tattoo onto Leto-Joker's left biceps.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/11/28 20:28:18


Post by: Frazzled


Knives out.
Very good actors, slightly dark humor, terrible southern accent by the detective (Daniel Craig).


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/11/29 16:26:13


Post by: Easy E


The Road Warrior

Not as over-the-top as I remembered. Still a fun little jaunt into the post-apocalypse.

Or Australia.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/12/02 14:50:55


Post by: Easy E


Julie and Julia

Some Manhattan blogger decides to make every recipe in Julie Child's cook book in one year.

Julie Childs comes off great along with her husband. I enjoyed this part of the movie immensely.

Julie the Blogger comes off as all the worst New York stereotypes made popular by Woody Allen, but in this they are not funny.

They even manage to slip in the famous Dan Akroyd bit.

It felt like a very long movie when I was watching it.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/12/03 00:38:16


Post by: Ensis Ferrae


 Elbows wrote:
Ford v. Ferrari: Good movie. Close to great. Nice acting, nice writing, great film of the cars (something that Rush failed to deliver). It's more a film about Miles than it is about the entire story, though it encompasses it well enough. Doesn't pull many punches. It does suffer a bit making the Ferrari company/team a little too much like twirling-moustachioed evil doers. I'm sure it was a budget consideration, but the story doesn't focus nearly enough on the other cars from the teams during the race. If anything though, it does a great job of showcasing the spirit and mentality of a true car guy, a true driver. Best racing film in a long time for me.


Saw this in theater as well and, for those who know the "full" story, it is a nice film. And, Ferrari were fairly well depicted in the film (The Commendatore was famous for many of the things portrayed on the screen). I will say that, while I've seen the comments online about casting, once you sit down and are actually watching the film in its entirety, I think most of the choices were spot on for the personalities presented.

Personally, am extremely happy to have seen it in theater. The sound system at my local cinema provided a nice and proper car noise during those scenes, making it worth it for that alone.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/12/04 14:40:33


Post by: Easy E


My wife and I were not feeling great, so we started a fire in the hearth, grabbed some hot beverages, wrapped up in blankets, and watched a Netflix Christmas movie produced and starring Vanessa Hudgens of High School Musical fame.....

The Knight Before Christmas
Pretty much what you expect from the title. A Knight gets sent through time on a quest to find true love by an old crone. He is sent from Narwich, England in 1334 to small-town Ohio in 2019! That is some powerful magic.

Of course, the Knight adjusts to his new live very quickly thanks to a cameo by Amazon's Alexa. The true purpose of the movie revealed as shilling for Amazon, we get a typical love story.

One thing that was off-putting in the movie was that the heroine and her family used to have a winter feast where people with no family or home were invited by her parents to dine with them. The actually underprivileged were invited. Since her parent's death, she decided to keep the tradition going..... by selling tickets and making it a charity. Therefore, no actually underprivileged, poor, or homeless people could actually afford to go anymore! This is portrayed as progress and a good thing! Really?!?

Another fun touch is the "hero" gets enamored watching Netflix on TV. He watches a different Netflix Christmas movie in a brilliant piece of cross-marketing by Netflix! Subtle!

Anyway, I have spent more words on this movie than it probably deserves. However, it felt a bit craven and commercial even for this type of movie. The tropes of a "Holiday" movie are almost all there and this would fit in great on the Hallmark channel.

They also left the ending open for a possible sequel next year! Look out A Christmas Prince!


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/12/07 00:34:05


Post by: Sigur


Ha, I saw this one up on Netflix and have to admit that I got somewhat intrigued. But I guess I'd rather watch Santa's little Helper or something.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/12/08 16:46:44


Post by: Turnip Jedi


had another run at Justice League it's still dreadful

cheered myself up with Muppet Christmas Carol, the version by which nearly all other takes fall short


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/12/08 18:43:28


Post by: Voss


 Easy E wrote:
My wife and I were not feeling great, so we started a fire in the hearth, grabbed some hot beverages, wrapped up in blankets, and watched a Netflix Christmas movie produced and starring Vanessa Hudgens of High School Musical fame.....

The Knight Before Christmas
Pretty much what you expect from the title. A Knight gets sent through time on a quest to find true love by an old crone. He is sent from Narwich, England in 1334 to small-town Ohio in 2019! That is some powerful magic.


Its a fairly tired trope in Harlequin romance novels (bodice rippers). Its just something witches can do, apparently.

There are things I learned while working in bookstores that I can't unlearn, and time traveling Vikings that become Navy Seals so they can sex up modern ladies is one of those things.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/12/09 14:31:22


Post by: Easy E


Voss wrote:
 Easy E wrote:
My wife and I were not feeling great, so we started a fire in the hearth, grabbed some hot beverages, wrapped up in blankets, and watched a Netflix Christmas movie produced and starring Vanessa Hudgens of High School Musical fame.....

The Knight Before Christmas
Pretty much what you expect from the title. A Knight gets sent through time on a quest to find true love by an old crone. He is sent from Narwich, England in 1334 to small-town Ohio in 2019! That is some powerful magic.


Its a fairly tired trope in Harlequin romance novels (bodice rippers). Its just something witches can do, apparently.

There are things I learned while working in bookstores that I can't unlearn, and time traveling Vikings that become Navy Seals so they can sex up modern ladies is one of those things.


I would read it.....


Automatically Appended Next Post:
Catwoman

It is as bad as I remember.

Halle Berry, what were you doing? It honestly felt like a DTV release, but I know it went into the theater. How did they get Berry and Stone to sign on to this mess?

You can tell it was made in the "early days" of comic book movies as the tone of the film jumps around about how seriously you should take the whole thing. Plus, any action is sapped of all momentum by jump-cut after jump-cut. The steadiest shots in the film are establishing shots.



Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/12/14 09:21:25


Post by: Sigur


Voss wrote:
 Easy E wrote:
My wife and I were not feeling great, so we started a fire in the hearth, grabbed some hot beverages, wrapped up in blankets, and watched a Netflix Christmas movie produced and starring Vanessa Hudgens of High School Musical fame.....

The Knight Before Christmas
Pretty much what you expect from the title. A Knight gets sent through time on a quest to find true love by an old crone. He is sent from Narwich, England in 1334 to small-town Ohio in 2019! That is some powerful magic.


Its a fairly tired trope in Harlequin romance novels (bodice rippers). Its just something witches can do, apparently.

There are things I learned while working in bookstores that I can't unlearn, and time traveling Vikings that become Navy Seals so they can sex up modern ladies is one of those things.




50 shades of conservatism.

Haven't really watched any films lately because I got back into DS9 with the whole Dominion War kicking off in some cracking episodes. And then seasons 6 and 7 roll on, with several really silly filler episodes. When I told a friend of mine that I'm finally catching up on DS9 I was surprised to hear that he's somewhat lukewarm on the show. All he said was that "there's some really, really silly episodes as well". Which now I understand. Not that I generally dislike silly episodes. It's one of the reasons I got a soft spot for Enterprise. But with DS9, which has not only a riveting war angle, but also some great episodes on politics and characters the silly ones just stand out much more and just don't fit.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/12/16 14:41:28


Post by: Easy E


A Beautiful Day in the Neighborhood

Hey, I thought this movie was about Mr. Rogers!

A world weary and cynical journalist who is having relationship problems with his new family and father is assigned a job to profile Mr. Rogers. His world is changed.

Of course, they make Mr. Rogers seem unearthly and almost alien. However, they do talk a bit about how he copes, and the sub-text of the dialogue hints at interesting things in his own life. For example, troubles as a father, why he swims everyday, etc.

However, the focus is on how Mr. Rogers challenges and channels people to reassess their own feelings through meaningful and considered questioning. The Socratic Method is on full display and it is a text book case of active listening and questioning.

I enjoyed it, but unless you have to see drama in the theater it can wait until Netflix/Video to see.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/12/16 18:04:04


Post by: greatbigtree


Bill and Ted’s Excellent Adventure:

Two Highschool Stoners (presumably) are in danger of failing their History course, and if they do, one will be sent to Military school. This was the standard procedure, in the 80’s, to get a kid to straighten up and fly right, so normal for the time.

But wait! If they’re separated, their band, the Wild Stallions will never come to be, and in the future, their music establishes an era of peace and tranquility for all humanity. To avoid this calamity, a man from the future returns to give them a time machine, which they use to collect historical figures to participate in their history report. Hyjinx ensue, as they collect these figures from the past.

Analysis: This is a terrible movie, by modern standards, not holding up at all to my childhood memories. That said, I’m glad to have watched it with my kids, to explain why I occasionally will perform a brief air-guitar solo (with sound) when an “excellent” occurrence happens. 30 years after theatrical release, it still plays a part in my day-to-day life... so there is that. Unlike many time travel movies, there was no concern whatsoever for things like paradoxes, causality loops, or anything like that. They even play with the notion of presumed success, when they run into problems. Finding the keys they needed, that their future selves will steal and leave for them, was a bit deus-ex-machina, but I remember at the time this seemed like an incredible super power, and lead to a lifelong interest in “time” as a concept. For such a terrible, virtually plotless movie, it really inspired a lot of interesting thoughts in my younger self. That would be my positive take-away, was that this movie * really* dumbs down time travel to the point a child can grasp and handle the idea, which serves as inspiration for later development.

It’s an ok watch, if you have youngsters to watch with and then talk to about the idea of time travel afterwards. A niche recommendation, but good for what it is.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/12/18 23:26:48


Post by: Easy E


White Christmas

I watch this with my family every year. Still my favorite Christmas movie.

This time, I noticed Bing lights his matches with his thumb..... tough guy!

Makes my wife cry about 3-4 times during the movie, and she has also seen it many, many, many times.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/12/19 02:08:59


Post by: Elbows


6 Underground: Michael Bay makes a copy of The Assassin's Bodyguard (a surprisingly fun and enjoyable film)..but makes it worse in every Michael Bay way.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/12/23 12:56:10


Post by: Sigur


@Greatbigtree: Oh come on. You gotta love Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure! Time travel rarely has been done as well (because I think that time travel plots are always doomed to fail on some level, and the more clever they try to be the worse it gets).



 Easy E wrote:
White Christmas

I watch this with my family every year. Still my favorite Christmas movie.

This time, I noticed Bing lights his matches with his thumb..... tough guy!

Makes my wife cry about 3-4 times during the movie, and she has also seen it many, many, many times.


Woah, I caught a part of that one on TV yesterday! Didn't appreciate the Snoooooooooooooooooow-song, but the film sure managed to get the "Sisters, Sisters" song in my head.



So what other christmas films would we like to see this year?
Never watched Elf, because I'm not a big Will Ferell fan at all, but a lot of people love this film.
I'd love to watch Reindeer Games again. That was a fun one.

Last week I was out for a weekend with "the lads". Each year before christmas we take a trip into the country of lower Austria to have a look at Perchten/Krampus runs and get quite drunk. It's great fun. When we got back to the hotel there was a christmas gangster film on tv starring Geena Davis. I'll have to find out which one that was. I fell asleep immediately, but the 5 minutes of the film I saw looked interesting.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/12/23 14:48:30


Post by: Easy E


 Sigur wrote:


Last week I was out for a weekend with "the lads". Each year before christmas we take a trip into the country of lower Austria to have a look at Perchten/Krampus runs and get quite drunk. It's great fun. When we got back to the hotel there was a christmas gangster film on tv starring Geena Davis. I'll have to find out which one that was. I fell asleep immediately, but the 5 minutes of the film I saw looked interesting.


I think the Long Kiss Goodnight takes place in winter.......

I watched a strange movie called The Undead....

A man hires a lady of the of the night to perform a mind experiment on to prove to an old professor that..... oh who cares! Some how, they all end up in a Fantasy Middle Ages in a way only low-budget Z-grade B&W flicks can do it!

It was a strange film as it may have been using footage from a failed movie project and stitched it in to make this work. There are some fun bits like the Grave Digger, Lydia the Witch, bad make-up chins, wire bats, Satan himself; but overall it is a slog and feels much longer than 78 minutes or so.

I have no idea why this was called The Undead, as there are no Undead in it. However, there is a spirit dance number in it......

Lydia the Witch


This is probably why this movie got made......



Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/12/23 15:35:13


Post by: Sigur


Oh, I love The Undead! Digger Smokin', Nightmare Fuel Imp, Satan (prince of cabaret, Peter Pan - Antichrist, etc.), Lydia ("What art thou supported with?"), STAAAAY!!!. MST3k aside, that one always struck me as a film I'd also quite enjoy without the commentary. Lydia aside (who is a very, very pretty lady), it's got a very interesting vibe to it, doesn't it. Very much like a stage play. Anyway, as an MST3k episode, it sure is one of my all-time favourites.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/12/23 16:32:52


Post by: Easy E


 Sigur wrote:
Oh, I love The Undead! Digger Smokin', Nightmare Fuel Imp, Satan (prince of cabaret, Peter Pan - Antichrist, etc.), Lydia ("What art thou supported with?"), STAAAAY!!!. MST3k aside, that one always struck me as a film I'd also quite enjoy without the commentary. Lydia aside (who is a very, very pretty lady), it's got a very interesting vibe to it, doesn't it. Very much like a stage play. Anyway, as an MST3k episode, it sure is one of my all-time favourites.


I did not know it was on MST3K. I watched it straight up.... just me and the movie.....

The modern version of Clash of the Titans

I enjoyed it for what it was, a LOTR knock-off. However, I am always disappointed in these movies because the Fellowship is always sundered, typically mortally and in uninspiring ways. At least in LOTR when Boromir leave the Fellowship it is an epic send-off.

Honestly, it is not bad for what it is, and I like the themes it presents. I just wish the main protagonist had a bit of onscreen presence or charisma. His companions were more interesting than him, and Mads Mikkelson rules!


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/12/26 15:55:31


Post by: Easy E


Gallery of Horror

Yawn.... wow, was this thing terrible. Bad acting, no horror, and super low budget. The "zinger" stories don't even make sense and have no punch to them.

I think my favorite bit was when something that was gory was going to happen, they put in a 1960's Batman-esque screen pop.


Not even laughably bad, just bad.




Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/12/26 19:45:05


Post by: Turnip Jedi


Whilst having a difference of opinion with the BBC Iplayer I noticed BFG was on

now there's a fizzwallop of tellipikture (I suspect it being one of the first books I can remember reading on my own helped)


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/12/26 19:45:43


Post by: Excommunicatus


What We Do In The Shadows

Vampires and Werewolves in New Zealand.

9/10


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/12/27 06:26:47


Post by: greatbigtree


Captain Marvel:

First time viewing. Summary: A woman with amnesia struggles to control her super powers, so that she can fight in a war (between aliens). She finds out that her superior officers are up to no good, and along the way meets members of an (Earth) government security force. She teams up with the security force, the plot takes her out of the picture for 20-some years... the good guys come out on top.

Analysis: I'd read a lot of bad press about this movie. Having no particular background knowledge of this character, I can say the movie handles the origin story in a fairly quick way. The sound track does *justice* to the 90's. That may have been my favourite part. It does well as a popcorn action movie with tons of nods to nostalgia and the "future" of the MCU. It has lots of quippy one-liners. If John Maclean had photon blasts that came out of his hands, and a space suit, I think he'd be right at home with Captain Marvel.

It's not a great movie. I don't think I'd pay to watch it a second time but it's not as though I feel ripped off for spending time with it.

It suffers a bit from Superman Syndrome. When your character is powerful enough to single handedly stop a continent-crushing orbital bombardment, and then single handedly destroy the space ship that dropped said bombs... and she then flies back down to Earth to have a fist-fight with her old teacher? I mean... really? He's a dude, and you're now *at least* a starship equivalent entity. I know how this fight is going to go.

But up until that point, that is the end of the movie, it's entertaining enough for what it is. I'd recommend watching if you've never seen it, though I wouldn't suggest paying "full price" for it.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/12/27 14:32:25


Post by: Easy E


Legion

God decides he is "sick ofthe Bulls**t" on Earth and decides to end us. The Archangel Michael disagrees and comes down to earth to protect a woman who is pregnant with the "Chosen One". Bad things come after them and we have a stand-off in a remote location.

It is a like a combination of The Prophecy, Assault on Precinct 13, and The Terminator all mixed together and ultimately not that good.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/12/27 16:25:02


Post by: BobtheInquisitor


I love Legion, but I tend to skip right to the scenes with Gabriel. It’s the kind of fun movie you’d find late at night on Tv and wonder why you never heard of it.

As for the eternal debate: I enjoyed Alita more than Captain Marvel.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/12/27 17:27:58


Post by: Voss


 greatbigtree wrote:
Captain Marvel:

First time viewing. Summary: A woman with amnesia struggles to control her super powers, so that she can fight in a war (between aliens). She finds out that her superior officers are up to no good, and along the way meets members of an (Earth) government security force. She teams up with the security force, the plot takes her out of the picture for 20-some years... the good guys come out on top.

Analysis: I'd read a lot of bad press about this movie. Having no particular background knowledge of this character, I can say the movie handles the origin story in a fairly quick way. The sound track does *justice* to the 90's. That may have been my favourite part. It does well as a popcorn action movie with tons of nods to nostalgia and the "future" of the MCU. It has lots of quippy one-liners. If John Maclean had photon blasts that came out of his hands, and a space suit, I think he'd be right at home with Captain Marvel.

It's not a great movie. I don't think I'd pay to watch it a second time but it's not as though I feel ripped off for spending time with it.

It suffers a bit from Superman Syndrome. When your character is powerful enough to single handedly stop a continent-crushing orbital bombardment, and then single handedly destroy the space ship that dropped said bombs... and she then flies back down to Earth to have a fist-fight with her old teacher? I mean... really? He's a dude, and you're now *at least* a starship equivalent entity. I know how this fight is going to go.


That's... actually the point of the 'fight.' Seriously, that is the stance the film is taking and trying to tell you. Its why she doesn't get into a fist-fight with him, and simply dismisses his attempts to try. And goes into space to deal with bigger problems on multiple worlds rather than hanging out on Earth and collaring pick-pockets.
It deals with Superman syndrome by sending her off into space to deal with galaxy-scale problems. With the Kree Supreme Intelligence on the list of things she intends to deal with, which is actually an ambitious challenge for her power.

Personally, I think its one of the best Marvel films. It doesn't spend the first half hour rehashing mundane stuff that's functionally pop culture/external memory now, or a lot of time navel gazing about trivia. Its a fun, coherent story.
It has a few problems (handling the Skrulls the way it does kills a lot of options later, or requires nonsense), but its one of the most solid stories in the MCU.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/12/27 22:51:57


Post by: H


My wife and I watched The Lighthouse.

It's interesting but most would probably find it disturbing and/or off-putting. I'd say I recommend it, but only if you aren't squeamish, aren't terribly interested in closure, and not bothered by not getting answers.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/12/28 08:15:30


Post by: greatbigtree


I’m looking forward to the Lighthouse on Netflix. It looks like a real trip... but the kind I might want to pause to go to the bathroom.

Regarding Captain Marvel being one of the better instalments of the MCU, I’d personally disagree. It’s good, and there are worse movies in the bunch, but I’d say all of the Avenger movies, GotG 1, Ragnarok, all of the Captain America movies and Iron Man 1 were all better movies. And I wasn’t a big fan of End Game.

Having known little about the Character, other than she’s a “Galaxy Class” entity, every combat was a forgone conclusion. Like, what was the point of any single punch-up that she was involved in? The baby seals are never going to beat the lady with the club. They can’t effectively shoot her with person-portable weaponry. They can’t effectively shoot her with continent-destroying missiles. Her obstacles *in the movie* were nothing for her power level. Aside from realizing her power level, there wasn’t much / anything going on character development wise. And I could level that claim at a lot of action movies, but it really stood out for me in this movie.

Asking her friend (sole caregiver for her child?) to join her on a mission to space? Why? You can fly. You can literally punch out a spaceship. You’re just putting her at risk for no reason!


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/12/28 17:02:31


Post by: Elbows


Been on a creature feature kick while painting...

Primeval: It's okay, but just okay. Has a few creepy scenes but is otherwise stuffed with too much non-creature stuff. Cool idea though (and based on a real crocodile I believe)

Rogue: Surprisingly good for a lower budget film. Better idea, and suitably silly. The ending just goes from silly to sillier.

47 Meters Down: The sequel(?): We may have a winner here. Yes the story is convoluted, the acting is terrible, the girls are annoying...but man they nailed a spooky shark movie. Jump scares are perfect and some excellent super-creepy scenes (particularly the introductions). Good stupid fun if you can put up with annoying high school girls screaming for 35% of the movie. A bit ruined by a PG-13 rating.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2019/12/31 12:57:42


Post by: Frazzled


US

Its a popular movie this year about a family that sees its mirror outside after going to the beach, and interesting shenanigans.

Review: Excellent. It doesn't hold together well if you start thinking about it, but watching it is unsettling. The wife and I had to watch it in chunks with breaks.
Its not terribly gory or fully of jump scares. It is more of a psychological creepfest. Quite entertaining. Peele is really working the "like Shamalian but way better!" thing going.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2020/01/08 21:33:34


Post by: Easy E


The Butler

Forest Gump, but through the eyes of an African American Butler at the White House. The people playing the various Presidents is good fun, but the movie jumps around a lot, hits all the Boomer highlights but is focused on Civil Rights, and ends on a positive and uplifting tone with the election of Obama.

A few things struck me:

1. I forgot that Oprah was also an actress.

2. The typical things Boomers take credit for accomplishing.... Civil Rights, Man on the Moon, ending Vietnam, were pretty big accomplishments that the generation responsible for them should be proud off. Too bad the Boomers didn't do them. It was the people who could actually wield the power at the time and that was still the Greatest Generation.... the Boomers parents. Take that Boomers! LOL.

3. It ended so hopeful...... I guess the joke is on the film makers.

4. All those racists young kids we see fighting for Segregation in the South against all the young black kids. I would love to see a similar type movie about them, and their life story.....


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2020/01/08 21:43:11


Post by: Elbows


Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark: I was so excited by this due to my love of the books when I was a kid...and Guillermo del Toro's involvement in the film. While the aesthetics for certain creatures were on point, the film was hugely underwhelming. I admit I generally expected to be disappointed, and it has a few moments...but it just didn't deliver on much. I was hoping this would exceed my low expectations.

Kiss the Girls: Good flick, really enjoyed the two Alex Cross films. Solid whodunit thriller style.

Along Came a Spider: Same as above. Morgan Freeman and decent stories, fun stuff.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2020/01/09 15:28:48


Post by: Easy E


HellBoy- The Ron Pearlman Edition

There are a lot of great elements in this film, but ultimately it doesn't add up and align properly to be a true success.

For example, we see a scene where Hellboy's impetuousness leads to the death of his closest human friend and his team. There is a brief scene that follows that deals with the follow-out of his decisions. It looks like we could have a compelling character arc started here..... but then it abruptly transitions to a light-hearted bit of rom-com between him, agent Myers, and Liz?

There is a bit more character arc on his relationship with the FBI boss and Hellboy based on the scene where his team is killed as they grow to respect each other. However, the character growth in Hellboy never develops or is expressed in the script. Huge miss!

In addition, the light Rom-Com stuff never really pans out either.

Overall, a disappointment.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2020/01/11 17:13:30


Post by: Elbows


T-34: Russian film about a WW2 Russian tank crew....pretty fun, silly and enjoyable. I've been enjoying the quality of Russian films lately.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2020/01/12 03:54:50


Post by: greatbigtree


The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe

Summary:

A snivelling little gak does NOT get the "just desserts" he deserves when he tries to backstab his brother and two sisters. Talking animals are all excited about the family coming to Narnia, because that means Lion-Jesus is going to finally bring spring back. Ice Queen isn't happy about that, so tries to kill Lion-Jesus but we all know how that goes, don't we? A big battle breaks out and the good guys win, despite not eviscerating the snivelling little gak, which they should have.

Analysis:

I've never really warmed to the Narnia universe. It's got basically all the ingredients that I like, but somehow the soup it results in just isn't to my taste.

That said, without diving into the story's religious background and inspiration, it's not a bad story. Cliches come from somewhere, and Narnia is one of those classics that formed those fantasy tropes. While it was likely fresh and new in it's day... it's not anymore.

So it's a nice, comfortable, family-friendly action adventure romp. There are worse ways to kill a rainy afternoon with the kids than to watch this movie.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2020/01/12 11:41:16


Post by: Ratius


Den of Thieves.
Basically a remake of HEAT (although not marketed at all like that).
However I thought it was significantly better. Didnt meander as much, wasnt up its own arse like heat was and the bank vault scene was darn tense. And a nice twist at the end.
Definitely worth a watch if you like cops VS robbers films.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2020/01/12 17:42:13


Post by: Turnip Jedi


 greatbigtree wrote:
The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe

Summary:

A snivelling little gak does NOT get the "just desserts" he deserves when he tries to backstab his brother and two sisters. Talking animals are all excited about the family coming to Narnia, because that means Lion-Jesus is going to finally bring spring back. Ice Queen isn't happy about that, so tries to kill Lion-Jesus but we all know how that goes, don't we? A big battle breaks out and the good guys win, despite not eviscerating the snivelling little gak, which they should have.

Analysis:

I've never really warmed to the Narnia universe. It's got basically all the ingredients that I like, but somehow the soup it results in just isn't to my taste.

That said, without diving into the story's religious background and inspiration, it's not a bad story. Cliches come from somewhere, and Narnia is one of those classics that formed those fantasy tropes. While it was likely fresh and new in it's day... it's not anymore.

So it's a nice, comfortable, family-friendly action adventure romp. There are worse ways to kill a rainy afternoon with the kids than to watch this movie.


Oh don't worry the spiteful Deity that lives in Lewis's muddled tales gets them all eventually, well apart from the woman of sinful life


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2020/01/20 14:51:13


Post by: Easy E


The Mask of Zorro

A very fun and adventurous story that hangs together well and does what it says on the tin. A very re-watchable blockbuster. One thing I really appreciate about this movie is that the villains are pretty competent, reasonably well-rounded, and are not afraid to do their own dirty work when it is needed. Plus, swordfights are cool!

The Legend of Zorro
The sequel to the first. it moves on in a somewhat logical manner. However, the plot and story are a bit of a downgrade and the introduction of the "child" Zorro is a bit much. The villains are much less competent in this one and everything seems like a bit of a downgrade from the first one.

Wild, Wild West
I loved this show as a kid.

Why did we make this and not another Zorro movie again? I have no idea.... this sucks by all possible definitions. I would have preferred a Zorro and the Black Lash movie where Zorro and his wife (the Black Lash) must taken on more Confederates trying to break the Union blockade by going through California.... or something. Instead, we have ..... THIS! Disappointing.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2020/01/21 15:38:23


Post by: Easy E


Dune

If you have not seen the David Lynch version of Dune, stop what you are doing right NOW!

Find it.

Watch it.

You are welcome.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2020/01/27 15:17:11


Post by: Easy E


Dragonheart

So, this has spun off how many DTV and streaming only spin-offs? Wow.

I guess I don't get the appeal. it was very uneven, and sometimes was laughably bad, and other times passably solid.

What is with Randy Quaid's "batman"-Voice? Pete Postelthwaite (sp) is great as usual. Best part of the movie maybe, but Sean Connery voicing the Dragon has its moments too. I expected him to make some sort of Trebek reference though.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2020/01/31 14:51:55


Post by: Easy E


The Last Samurai

Sure, there are a lot of things very wrong with this movie..... but I still like it!

It delivers on stirring and motivational score, good looking imagery, and cool stuff happening.

.... but it is still so wrong on so many levels.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2020/02/04 19:53:05


Post by: Easy E


Hairspray

I am really torn how to feel about this movie. There is a message about excepting and loving who you are, but they take some nasty shots at everyone involved along the way.... so torn.

Also, John Travolta as the Mom character was.... very distracting in a bad way.

Watching movies that deal with historical racism and integration have been a real downer for me lately.



Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2020/02/06 00:14:29


Post by: LordofHats


Midway

Run of the mill war flick. Mostly what I expected. Typical historical apocryphism that shouldn't bother any typical movie goers and the normal war movie cliches.

The CGI is god awful and easily the worst part of the movie. It invokes this uncanny valley like effect at every opportunity, cause it doesn't look "bad" but it looks "CGI" and it constantly stands out like a sore thumb.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2020/02/06 00:25:31


Post by: greatbigtree


Jumanji: The Next Level

Very enjoyable, family friendly film. The setup is a bit off, but having the characters swap avatars part way through put a fun and fresh spin on things.

Since my first official date with my wife was to go see the original (Robin Williams) Jumanji in theatres, the franchise has a soft spot in my heart, so I don’t think I can give a real, hard critique of the film. But if you liked the first two Juman... jye? Jumanji-ees? Movies set in the alternate reality known as Jumanji? Then the third is quite satisfying.

Seeing the actors (of the avatars) taking on the personas of the characters (in movie-real-life) was a lot of fun. Particularly hearing the Rock and Awkwafina take on Danny Devito’s New Yoakah accent in the game parts was a lot of fun.

I’d recommend it. Light, fun, good time.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2020/02/08 03:54:16


Post by: Sigur


 Easy E wrote:
The Last Samurai

Sure, there are a lot of things very wrong with this movie..... but I still like it!

It delivers on stirring and motivational score, good looking imagery, and cool stuff happening.

.... but it is still so wrong on so many levels.


Exactly how I feel about that film.


@greatbigtree: I keep hearing very good things about this new Jumanji franchise.


Let's see, what did I watch...

I saw Sleepless in Seattle (1993)

Last time I've seen it must have been first run on TV or something. It's been a long time. First time I watched the non-dubbed version too. Somehow not having Tom Hanks speaking in the voice I'm used to draws attention to how weird his face looks.
Meg Ryan looks like a pretty person in that film, but a person. Which is cool. It's nice in general how much people in films back then looked like persons.

Anyway, you kniw the film. you probably know the plot even if you don't know the film. Tom Hanks' wife just died, so he's a single parent now, he calls in on a radio show and opens up, people listen to his story and really are taken with it, one of whom is Meg Ryan over in New York.

I watched it with a friend who I watch through all of Frasier every few years, so we had a ton of fun when Niles showed up, playing Niles even. And I think we may have spotted Maris, even though they called her Betsy or something. Then Kenny Daly paid a visit, very much fitting his Frasier role as well. Excellent stuff.

Anyway, this film is so hard to dislike. And it actually is done really cleverly. We cut back and forth between Tom Hanks trying to get 'back out there' dating, Meg Ryan leading her life with her fiancée (Bill Pullman, who's the real hero of the film and a great president). Over the course of the film we spend so much time with each of the characters and seem them struggle, but getting on with their lives that it really is an odd moment when in the end they actually meet. To me it was just really nice how the whole thing finds its resolution. The most interesting thing was the very end, when they meet, walk out hand in hand, and Meg Ryan looking at Tom Hanks in this really peculiar manner. She hasn't seen his face then, but over months had been obsessed with that man and just left her fiancee for him simply she believed in those signs which are entirely accidental. This look really drew me in because she lingers on his face and she looks kinda happy, but also in slight disbelief, studying his face, as they quietly go to the elevator.

Sure, sure, it makes no sense and "omg what if either of them is a total loon" and all of that cynical crap (as embodied by Meg Ryan's flatmate Rosie O'Donnell). Here's a lady who is aromantic and who is putting things on the line for this idea of 'the perfect fit'. Sure, she hires a private detective to check up on whether or not the guy is lying about all of his life or not. That's the thing - she isn't an idiot. Nobody in this film is.

Speaking of the private eye thing she does - there are two quite pivotal scenes in which computers and the internet are used in the film. Okay, they're super useful, these computer things, which is a bit unrealistic, but in both scenes it's women using the new media quite casually and competently. They don't have to resort to a 'nerdy friend' or stuff like that. I'm quite ignorant to the finer nuances of gender interplay and representation and stuff, but that I really liked.

I also noticed how it's impossible not to draw some parallels between Tom Hanks and his son in this film and the Liam Neeson story (or rather his son's I guess) in Love Actually. All the dad-son dialoge stuff (which is really nice in Love Actually) - Sleepless in Seattle did that pretty much equally well 10 years before that. Not to detract from Love Actually of course. I'm not the biggest fan of that story though.

Must See



Cool Hand Luke (1967)

Watched this classic for the first time!

Army veteran Paul Newman is hit with a very, very harsh prison sentence after damaging a parking meter or something like that. He's thrown into prison in the South of the US, including chains and singing and lots of handiwork along roads and all of that. And he just doesn't want to stay in prison, that rascal. Keeps on breaking out, him. Over and over. Which is why the German title of the film is Der Unbeugsame ("The Unfaltering").

There's prison hierarchy stuff in the beginning, male bonding, all that stuff. And then lots of breaking-outing. Paul Newman does it with cleverness, cheekiness, and a smile. Each time they get him back he's punished harshly, but he can't be kept down. It may sound like a simplistic plot, but it's really engaging to watch.

Watch It



Event Horizon (1997)

It's the mid-21st century, mankind's got a moon base and whatnot and in the early 40s launched an exploration ship (the Event Horizon) to go beyond Jupiter for the first time. Well, it got to Jupiter and then vanished. Now it's popped back up! A ship (captained by Laurence Fishburne), among its crew the designer (Sam Neil) of the revolutionary new drive that's supposed to get the Event Horizon out far into space is sent out on a rescue mission and to investigate what happened.

This one's one of my go-to sci-fi fun times films. Loved it from the first time I've seen it. Not the least of course because it's 40k as heck, it's also just a cool scenario and looks amazing. Because it's a Paul W.S. Anderson film. It also comes with some of the shortcomings of his film - the plot is kinda patchy, the pacing is odd (however, studio seems to had him cut like a third of the film, which sucks. AND those scenes are proper lost due to unwise storage. Which sucks BIG TIME.) and there's a ton of jumpscares. And for the first time I noticed these shortcomings a bit. However, it's a fun film. Should be watched if you like Space Horror things, and for that it did new things.

Watch It.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2020/02/08 16:38:15


Post by: Turnip Jedi


 Easy E wrote:
The Last Samurai

Sure, there are a lot of things very wrong with this movie..... but I still like it!

It delivers on stirring and motivational score, good looking imagery, and cool stuff happening.

.... but it is still so wrong on so many levels.


it is indeed a gorgeously polished film, even if some of the 'history' is on par with "The Scottish film" (heck they even share that whole rich folks are backstabby gak-lords thing)


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2020/02/09 19:57:15


Post by: AegisGrimm


The Wandering Earth.

I loved it as a complete balls to the wall crazy premise. Probably one of the dumbest ever. Like, it's pretty ambitious to go sooooo crazy with your movie plot.

The Sun is dying? Eh, what the hell? Lets just stick engines all over Earth and propel it out of the solar system to Alpha Centauri! Uh, oh...we're gonna hit Jupiter! Hard to starboard!

But at the same time the movie is gorgeous. Some of the coolest special effects I've seen, especially out of China of all places. I loved it for all the reasons I loved the special effects in Aquaman, to turn my mind off and enjoy the pretty scenes.



Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2020/02/10 14:51:43


Post by: Frazzled


Parasite.
*From the Director of The Host and includes some of the actors.

Setting, a very poor urban S Korean family of grifters slowly insinuate their way into a hyper rich family.
Its billed as a comedy and has some comedic moments but it aint no comedy. It is weird however.

Recommendation: If you like a weird plot, good acting, good writing, some disconcerting scenes (in that they catch up with you later and make you think), and are tired of CGI driven stuff, this is a film for you. Pay attention to the juxtaposition of the poor family and the wealthy one. There is a lot of social commentary on S Korea classes here (like a lot of horror movies in S Korea actually). It is in S. Korean but subtitled.

Side note, I love the wealthy family's house that most of the film is centered in. Its really a castle design but with a glorious view of their garden. Swap in an elevator instead of stairs, a Hacienda style interior and Frazzled has his perfect Hacienda del Troy!


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2020/02/10 15:03:40


Post by: Easy E


@Sigur....

Was Sleepless in Seattle Tom Hanks or Billy Crystal? I honestly do not recall as there was a knock off called something like "You've Got Mail" that starred one of the two, while Sleepless in Seattle starred the other......

I could just google but....... bleh.


Birds of Prey

Amusing. Better than Suicide Squad by... alot. Closer to Guardians of the Galaxy. Some fun action scenes too.

Margrot Robie must love this role as Harley since she was the Producer of the film. It is clear she is having tons of fun in the role, and she probably likes it 100 times better than playing Sharon Tate for QT.

Finally, the movie reveals that Harley is a Bernie Bro......


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2020/02/10 15:45:27


Post by: LunarSol


 Easy E wrote:
@Sigur....

Was Sleepless in Seattle Tom Hanks or Billy Crystal? I honestly do not recall as there was a knock off called something like "You've Got Mail" that starred one of the two, while Sleepless in Seattle starred the other......

I could just google but....... bleh.


Tom Hanks AND Meg Ryan are in both of those movies....


Automatically Appended Next Post:
Jojo Rabbit

Great film. Not nearly the comedy its advertised as; most of the zany trailer action happens early on to make way for a really nuanced dissection of the classic "are we the baddies?" Flying Circus joke. Some incredibly hard hitting moments and a rousing well deserved ending.

Frozen 2

I love the original but the sequel was just.... meh. Like, really really really meh. It's also one of those movies where all you can do afterwards is question what few things actually happen afterwards because nothing clicks into place.

John Wick 3: Parabellum

More John Wick is always good though I didn't love this one as much as the two before. The very videogamey scenes lacked the creativity that most of the series has thrived on, though other scenes had some great ideas. It just felt a little more generic than the two before, but still pretty great.

Bumblebee

I'm sorry I slept on this one just because it deserves more money than it got. Probably the best feature film adaptation of an 80's toy commercial one could hope for, even if in a lot of ways its like one of those TV episodes that cribs on a masterpiece. Easily one of the best episodes of that show, but still a paltry imitation of in this case, Iron Giant.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2020/02/10 16:16:37


Post by: Elbows


Midsommar: A great slow-burn kind of thriller. Still relies on the classic "man these people aren't paying attention to what's happening" a bit too much...and it's really long/slow for a lot of people I'm sure. Pleasantly non-Hollywood feeling though.

1917: Great bit of movie-making. This movie is worth it solely for the sets and attention to detail. The presentation of WW1's terrain/environment is tremendous. The "one shot" film style did detract a little bit from it, but overall a really good watch.

Creed II: There's nothing wrong with this movie from a writing/directing/acting/lighting/staging perspective...it's just...painfully formulaic. You've already seen this film. You know exactly how it plays out, you know the result. There are no surprises, nothing. Adonis Creed still presents nothing particularly charismatic or likeable, so there's little to no payoff with the expected and completely scripted result. So, if you're in the mood for that kind of film, you'll enjoy it.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2020/02/10 17:05:52


Post by: Easy E


 LunarSol wrote:
 Easy E wrote:
@Sigur....

Was Sleepless in Seattle Tom Hanks or Billy Crystal? I honestly do not recall as there was a knock off called something like "You've Got Mail" that starred one of the two, while Sleepless in Seattle starred the other......

I could just google but....... bleh.


Tom Hanks AND Meg Ryan are in both of those movies....



You are right. I was thinking of When Harry Met Sally which BOTH of these movies are probably knocks of!


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2020/02/10 19:34:28


Post by: Elbows


American Assassin: A middle of the road action movie, hurt by using a hum-drum non-charismatic main character who generally acts like a dick most of the film. A real void. Saved by Michael Keaton, or this would have been an absolute waste of time. I struggle when movie studios pick really gak actors for their main lead roles in a film...just kills it for me.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2020/02/12 00:23:48


Post by: Sigur


 Easy E wrote:
 LunarSol wrote:
 Easy E wrote:
@Sigur....

Was Sleepless in Seattle Tom Hanks or Billy Crystal? I honestly do not recall as there was a knock off called something like "You've Got Mail" that starred one of the two, while Sleepless in Seattle starred the other......

I could just google but....... bleh.


Tom Hanks AND Meg Ryan are in both of those movies....



You are right. I was thinking of When Harry Met Sally which BOTH of these movies are probably knocks of!



Nothing against When Harry Met Sally, but Sleepless in Seattle is all about the two never really meeting or having a relationship while the former is all about the two being in basically a never-ending relationship, right?

You've got Mail was just a cheap cash-in on Hanks/Ryan and Interwebs I thought. To be honest, never seen it. Because it hear it's just a bit rubbish.



I can't wait to see Parasite. Should be good. Can't really live up to the hype, but I'm happy if it does what I hear that it does.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2020/02/12 17:15:09


Post by: Ratius


13 hours, secret soldiers of benghazi.
Yup its a michael bay movie but darn I enjoyed it.
Basically ex special forces contractors have to defend a CIA compound in libya.
The firefights are great in this as you'd expect from MB, actors are fairly solid and it has a decent pace.
Sure its not oscar material but worth a watch if you want some good pewpew action.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2020/02/17 15:06:49


Post by: Easy E


Naked Gun: From the Files of Police Squad

I forgot how "straight" they actually play this movie. I remember it as being all slapstick, word-play and non-sequitars. However, it is not.

For example, when our hero Lt. Frank Drebin screws up an assaults someone very important the next scene he is suspended from the squad. His stupid actions have consequences in this movie. I was surprised.

Still a funny movie.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2020/02/17 15:50:33


Post by: Casualty


 Easy E wrote:
Naked Gun: From the Files of Police Squad

I forgot how "straight" they actually play this movie. I remember it as being all slapstick, word-play and non-sequitars. However, it is not.

For example, when our hero Lt. Frank Drebin screws up an assaults someone very important the next scene he is suspended from the squad. His stupid actions have consequences in this movie. I was surprised.

Still a funny movie.


I definitely think that's one of the things that sets it - and Airplane - apart from lots of others. Treated a little differently, the same premise/plot would actually work in a serious version of the same movie.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2020/02/17 15:53:55


Post by: Sigur


 Easy E wrote:
Naked Gun: From the Files of Police Squad

I forgot how "straight" they actually play this movie. I remember it as being all slapstick, word-play and non-sequitars. However, it is not.

For example, when our hero Lt. Frank Drebin screws up an assaults someone very important the next scene he is suspended from the squad. His stupid actions have consequences in this movie. I was surprised.

Still a funny movie.


Oh yes, it absolutely still works.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2020/02/17 17:31:47


Post by: Elbows


Leviathan: Despite being a fan of creature flicks, and a lover of Abyss and ALIEN, etc...I had never even heard of this movie. Wow, it's...something. Not a good something, but a derivative something. While the production values are fine, the entire film just screams "derivative". Someone watched ALIEN and The Thing...and then made a movie that was garbage compared to the Abyss (which came out the same year). Just feels like a budget copy-cat film, which is unfortunate. The creature effects (despite being by the Stan Winston studio) are...bad, like...b-movie bad. Even the cast is just a complete "b team". I don't know how it has 4/5 stars on Amazon. It's a 2.5-3/5 at best.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2020/02/17 18:55:02


Post by: Easy E


 Elbows wrote:
Leviathan: Despite being a fan of creature flicks, and a lover of Abyss and ALIEN, etc...I had never even heard of this movie. Wow, it's...something. Not a good something, but a derivative something. While the production values are fine, the entire film just screams "derivative". Someone watched ALIEN and The Thing...and then made a movie that was garbage compared to the Abyss (which came out the same year). Just feels like a budget copy-cat film, which is unfortunate. The creature effects (despite being by the Stan Winston studio) are...bad, like...b-movie bad. Even the cast is just a complete "b team". I don't know how it has 4/5 stars on Amazon. It's a 2.5-3/5 at best.


I believe a movie called Deep Star Six also came out around the same time. I have NO memory of it.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2020/02/18 01:19:00


Post by: greatbigtree


Birds of Prey / Harley Quinn 2020:

Synopsis: Our favourite criminal mind has broken up with the Joker, and all her previous sins are coming back to haunt her.

Lots of nods to comics current and old. The movie introduces some familiar characters in Black Canary, Huntress and gives an older, more mature Montoya a place in the DCU. Victor Zhaz makes an appearance... I hope he has a comic-book-style-survival story.

Black Mask is definitely not coming back... and what a Harley Quinn resolution to that problem.

Analysis: Strangely, my takeaway from this is that Ewan McGreggor was wasted in a one-off role of a relatively small-time character! The character has strong analogues in terms of relationship with Quinn that the Joker shares. McGreggor manages an over-the-top comic villain, that maintains *exactly enough* realism to be a believable, even relatable villain with realistic justifications for his villainous behaviour. His capture of a complete narcissist turning all events in relation to himself... I was really impressed.

The relationship between Zhaz and Roman had an interesting subtle subtext that was impressive for a comic book movie. Nothing overt, but like a faint aftertaste maybe?

I find comic movies are only as strong as the villains, and the key villains were brought an excellent depth and sense of reality to them. They were bad, flawed people. But they also had relatable goals and motivations.

I would strongly recommend the film if you’re a fan of Harley Quinn. She felt more “natural” in this film, and there were great comic references pulled that fans will really enjoy.

If you’re a Ewan McGreggor fan, which I apparently am, his portrayal is about as flip-side of a role as I could imagine for him.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2020/02/18 14:58:11


Post by: Easy E


The thing about Black Mask

Spoiler:

I think he can pretty much come back as any aspiring crime boss, wearing a mask.

I loved Ewan's performance as well, but did not think of him as the Black Mask we all know and love. The Black Mask can go to anyone. That's part of the joy of costumed criminals.


Charlie's Angels

The one with Cameron Diaz, Lucy Lui, Drew Barrymore, and BIll Murray.

It was very dated and felt like an action-comedy from the time it was made. The best part was an opening joke about a T.J. Hooker: Movie and Hollywood making bad movie versions of 70's TV shows. The rest of it was pure fan-service of the most base nature. The plot barely hung together and was obviously just an excuse to get the three actresses to show off and have fun. It actually felt like a music video more than anything else.

Sam Rockwell is pretty amazing in it though.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2020/02/18 19:44:58


Post by: greatbigtree


I agree that Black Mask, as a villain, is just a basic Mob Boss in the world of Comic Books. That's also wearing a mask.

I was just impressed with how McGreggor brought the Roman-side to life. For what could have been a real throw-away role given to pretty much anyone, I was really taken with the way the character was NOT one dimensional. Or maybe that the one dimension was really well done?


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2020/02/19 16:31:18


Post by: Easy E


The Earth Dies Screaming

Great title, AMAZING title.

It starts off strong with bodies all over the place as a survivor motors into town, and steals a radio. Dead people are everywhere.... or are they? They are not all dead and soon he links up with some survivors.

A good start.... that never gets any better than that. In fact, the climax is down right boring. There are robots and the least threatening zombies ever.

What a waste of a great title.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2020/02/26 15:24:40


Post by: LordofHats


Color out of Space

The movie named after the famed Lovecraft story isn't very Lovecraft, but it isn't actually all that bad. Its' not a particularly scary movie, but it isn't a bad movie. It's got a sort of 80s camp horror vibe that is kind of refreshing honestly. The film reminds of classics like Poltergeist. The acting is capable (even Nicholas freaking Cage?!), and the movie does manage to build a creepy atmosphere and sense of foreboding, even if it's not on par with the existential horror you'd expect of the film's pedigree.

Special mention should go here, because this movie actually got me to respect Nicholas Cage as an actor...


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2020/02/26 17:13:16


Post by: Elbows


Parasite: Good, and bizarre in a typically Korean way. Well filmed, well acted (a bit of the weird Korean ham, but that's...a thing). Keeps you guessing, but overall I don't fully understand the momentous praise for it? It is a good film though.

Rambo: Last Blood: Meh, big time meh. While a completely mediocre story, it didn't deliver on the hilarious violence level of the previous film (that film's only redeeming quality - laugh out loud levels of violence). This was not a surprise, but it's exactly as mediocre as you think it'll be.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2020/02/26 17:37:04


Post by: Frazzled


Jo Jo Rabbit:
the loving story of a boy and his imaginary friend who happens to be Dear Leader, and shenigans in late war Germany.

If you like Waititi stuff this is awesome. I think Thomasin McKensie stole the movie.
Good acting, writing. I think its the best movie 2019 movie I saw.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2020/02/26 23:52:04


Post by: Easy E


Shaft

This is the most recent one that came and went through the theaters in the blink of an eye.

Sam Jackson's Shafts son is an FBI analyst and a Hipster. His friend is killed in a mysterious OD. This leads him to seek the help of his estranged father, Shaft.

Shenanigans ensue.

This movie... it is not good. However, I could easily see it becoming a guilty pleasure of mine as it is somewhat satisfying character arcs, features the original Shaft kicking ass, and decent action-comedy beats.

Not great, but not terrible either. I enjoyed it but it is not worth anything beyond a streaming service or catch on cable.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2020/02/27 05:03:24


Post by: Ensis Ferrae


 Frazzled wrote:
Jo Jo Rabbit:
the loving story of a boy and his imaginary friend who happens to be Dear Leader, and shenigans in late war Germany.

If you like Waititi stuff this is awesome. I think Thomasin McKensie stole the movie.
Good acting, writing. I think its the best movie 2019 movie I saw.


I just picked it up, but haven't had time to watch it yet, i've seen quite a number of reviews suggesting similar/same


Most recently, I watched Joker, the Joaquin Phoenix one.

my review is this: If you go into it knowing and understanding a character study and/or a bit of a social commentary on things, rather than it being a "batman movie" focused from the pov of the villain, you'll be aright. . . Phoenix does quite an amazing job with the character, and they definitely brought some new elements to the character

Spoiler:
for instance, having him have that neurological disorder that involves laughing/crying at inappropriate times and despite the person's actual feelings, was an interesting take and a fairly nice touch to an often unheard of disorder


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2020/02/27 11:57:55


Post by: Turnip Jedi


Hellboy (2019)

A bit of a mess but I dont think its quite deserved the kicking it got, I think there's an element of brimstone tinted glass' as the prior films are quite shonky too but big Ron's turn kind of saves them

Bohemian Rhapsody

Ok so the facts and timeline take a bit of bending but its still a splendid fairy tale opera of a film and whilst Mr Malek deserved the Oscar the chap playing Brian May got done robbed come awards season

The Good Place

Season's 3 and most of 4 felt a bit like spinning wheels to go nowhere but by grobbins did they stick the landing, most likely 2nd best finale ever (behind Six Feet Under)


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2020/02/27 14:56:16


Post by: Easy E


Battle Angel: Alita

Probably the best live-action Anime I have seen. It even makes a bit of sense, even if the ending is not very rewarding.

Sometimes, the uncanny valley crops up, but since the main character is an uncanny valley cyborg, you can overlook it.

I would watch it again.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2020/02/27 15:00:26


Post by: Turnip Jedi


 Easy E wrote:
Battle Angel: Alita

Probably the best live-action Anime I have seen. It even makes a bit of sense, even if the ending is not very rewarding.

Sometimes, the uncanny valley crops up, but since the main character is an uncanny valley cyborg, you can overlook it.

I would watch it again.


Important question, does it have the Rocket Hammer ? a weapon so silly even 40k doesn't have them


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2020/02/27 18:07:59


Post by: BobtheInquisitor


Yes, it does.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2020/02/27 19:31:41


Post by: Turnip Jedi




happy happy joy joy, I'll add it to the list


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2020/02/27 20:18:15


Post by: Easy E


The Rocket Hammer is definitely there, and the guy who uses it is even funnier.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2020/02/27 20:30:17


Post by: Elbows


Hobbs & Shaw: Completely okay entertainment. A bit above average, but not quite on the level of "fun" that the last couple of Fast and Furious films have been at (which I've thoroughly enjoyed since the "new" era started around the Brazilian one, great popcorn movies). I was expecting a bit more as I enjoy Johnson, Statham and Elba. Actions scenes were probably the least fulfilling, sadly.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2020/02/27 20:58:39


Post by: foenixphate


Kellys Heroes: I know, I know, as a wargamer its one I should have gotten too sooner. Fantastic film, wonderful cast doing what they are good at (it was the age of character actors I guess) Clint Eastwood being tough and charismatic, Telly Savalas being cool as a cucumber, Donald Sutherland being nuts (Oddball steals every scene) and Don Rickles being dry and sarcastic. I suppose I'm not telling anyone things they don't know, but the ending was a wonderful subversion of what I expected from a film of the era and I'd argue why it holds up so well.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2020/02/27 21:33:23


Post by: Turnip Jedi


foenixphate wrote:
Kellys Heroes: I know, I know, as a wargamer its one I should have gotten too sooner. Fantastic film, wonderful cast doing what they are good at (it was the age of character actors I guess) Clint Eastwood being tough and charismatic, Telly Savalas being cool as a cucumber, Donald Sutherland being nuts (Oddball steals every scene) and Don Rickles being dry and sarcastic. I suppose I'm not telling anyone things they don't know, but the ending was a wonderful subversion of what I expected from a film of the era and I'd argue why it holds up so well.


you'd be surprised, one of my old man grumps is the general incuriosity of young 'uns these days nudging them out of their MCU / Fast Car Franchise or whatever bubble into the unknown wilds of classic movies is doing bods work


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2020/02/29 17:38:14


Post by: Elbows


Jumanji 2: Watched this with the niece and nephew. Entertaining, but not as charming/amusing as the first one.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2020/02/29 17:59:49


Post by: BobtheInquisitor


Watched John Carter of Mars with my wife and son because I'd remembered it as a lighthearted sci fi adventure. I must have been thinking about the books, because the movie stuffed in a whole lot of tortured antihero crap, even during the "fun" scenes. My family was not happy with me.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2020/03/03 12:33:11


Post by: tumblebomb


The Shape of Water: Del Toros most mundane film yet. A perfectly good film and hard to fault but only wee bit exciting, I kept waiting for something really weird to happen. I felt it was a bit long waiting for the resolution at the end. Characters and the acting were superb.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2020/03/07 13:25:36


Post by: Turnip Jedi


Titans

Usual Mask soap opera with a few redeeming elements, the wonderfully cuddlesome Donna, the crazy version of Bruce that lives in Dick's head, and of course Krypto (fingers crossed for a Legion of Super Pets spin-off)


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2020/03/07 16:03:25


Post by: warhead01


Dr. Sleep

I was really excited to see this after seeing the trailers.
We really enjoyed it.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2020/03/07 19:21:10


Post by: greatbigtree


The Lord or the Rings: Fellowship of the Ring

My wife’s friend has never seen this, so she and her husband came over with their kids and we watched it. In Canada, “Hobbit Leaf” is quite legal, so we did as wizards do, so we could all see the bigger picture before we started to watch.

Synopsis: You’re on Dakka Dakka. You’ve seen the movie before. Frodo, the most useless of Hobbitses is given a ring. They go on the run. They meet elves and dwarves and along the way. we pick up all the tropes of fantasy. Rangers dual-wielding. Undead are damaged by fire. Elves are casual magic-users. Elves are the bestest at *everything*. Dwarven animosity towards... everything. Halflings have racial bonuses to hiding and thieving in general. Magic swords and actual plot armour saving Frodo’s life. The failings of greedy men forcing them to abandon their vows and let Frodo go off on his own, so that their desire for power doesn’t destroy them all. A noble, and redeeming sacrifice.

Analysis: This is the root of modern fantasy. The common font of our tropes and expectations. I don’t feel that criticism of the structure is fair, as the story is the “baseline” by which *other* fantasy stories are measured. I’ve read elsewhere that Tolkien opposed Industrialization, and that’s why the Dwarves with their greed, Men with their drive for power, and Orcs and their disregard for nature were cast as the dark forces of the world, and why only when men came together to oppose those forces were they redeemed.

I’m not personally opposed to industrialization, though I acknowledge it was not implemented in a human friendly manner, and can understand why Tolkien would have been opposed at the time.

Anyhow, not much to add other than if, for some reason you haven’t seen it, you should before your geek membership gets revoked.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2020/03/09 12:19:02


Post by: Frazzled


The Gentlemen. The latest Guy Ritchie film (Snatch, Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels)

Mickey Pearson is an American expatriate who became rich by building a highly profitable marijuana empire in London. When word gets out that he's looking to cash out of the business, it soon triggers an array of plots and schemes -- including bribery and blackmail -- from shady characters who want to steal his domain.

Fun film. Not up to the epic of Snatch, but quite excellent. Mr. Dazed and Confused plays a great gangster actually. Typical Ritchie plot, and writing.

Loved it.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2020/03/09 17:10:09


Post by: Elbows


Fury: I own this one, so it goes on sometimes when I'm bored. Still a completely "okay" movie until you reach the awful Hollywood ending. Like many WW2 films of late, it's more fun just for admiring the scenery/equipment/tanks than much else. The cast does a great job, which makes the nonsensical ending/plot even more frustrating.


Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature @ 2020/03/09 17:44:36


Post by: Kid_Kyoto


I needed to watch Conan the Barbarian AND the Destroyer for RESEARCH, so I got 4 pack with them, Kull and Scorpion King.

The two Conans are very different, light and dark but both good. I prefer Destroyer since it was always on when I was a kid and I have fond memories of it.

Scorpion King tries to do the same and has some of the Rock's humor and charisma but is still a bit of a pale imitation.

Kevin Sorbo's Kull was originally going to be Conan 3 but Arnold pulled out so they changed it to Robert E Howard's other barbarian hero. It feels like an extra long episode of Hercules, so yeah. About as good as that. Made me wish I'd watched Destroyer again.