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I was supposed to get my son for a week or so this X-mas. I have not seen him since X-mas last year because mom up and remarried 4 days after our divorce was finalised and spirited herself and him away to live with HIS parents all the way in Lincoln City OREGON.

She calls me YESTERDAY and tells me that she decided NOT to go home (dallas tx) for X-mas and that I would have to pick him up in Oregon instead of the major airport hub in Dallas costing me an additional 350 dollars in plane ticket fees.( I live in Virginia) Needless to say, with my tight money issues recently, it's not possible. SO, now I dont get to see my son this X-mas, as was promised over the last entire year. She doesnt actually say that I CAN'T have him, its just impossible for me to afford now with my almost 600 dollars a month child support for him.

She also wouldnt allow him to come out for my Sherriff graduation so that his grandparents and I could have him around for that occasion...her reasoning...he was starting a remedial school, not kindergarten, but a "catchup" type class and if he came out here he would have to start it one week late.

I dont know what to do.  Our divorce agreement allows for frequent and liberal visitation rights but it doesnt address her moving clear across the country and what that does to my relationship with my 4 year old son that I havent seen since he was 3 last X-mas.  Therefore, she isnt really in any violation of the agreement as far as I can see.

I'm beginning to feel that I've truly lost my son.  He cant possibly know me anymore.

I cant stand it.

Time to lawyer up. Just because you don't see any reason doesn't mean he won't and I'd be willing to bet that showing when an agreement was come to no one had mentioned taking him across state lines. You are not getting your visitation rights. If you are in a law enforcement department someone should know a good one.

Deadshane, I really feel for you mate. It sure sounds like you got a really raw deal. Congrats on the Sherrif Grad though, so good onya mate.

Judging by your Avatar(Believe it or not, I actually think you could tell alot about a person by the pics they like!) you have a pretty good sense of humour. Hawkeye is da man, so I hope you are at least a little like him.

I hate to say this, but Ahtman, if the $350 is an issue, what sort of Lawyer could you get for less? I have no idea if the US has Legal Aid, like we do in Aus, so it may be a bit tricky sorting this one out.

All I can say Deadshane is this, you have fellow enthusiasts of 40k out there, and some of the support you may find in friendly, civil discourse may brighten your day a bit.

I cannot for the life of me work out how these absolutely Outdated and archaic family laws are still around, but that is the way of the world.

IMHO, you made half of that little man. You should be able to have enough access to make sure he grows up the way you think is right, and I do not think 1 weekend a year is enough.

And don't worry mate, Even Eric Clapton's son would recognise him in Heaven, and your son is there in your heart all the time.... a bond that can NEVER be broken.


Sorry to go on about this everybody else. My mom and dad divorced when I was about 5, and I never saw him again, due to 'courts' and what everybody else 'thought was best for me'. He passed away when i was 17.

No amount of Lawyering will bring him back, so stick to your Gunz Deadshane, take no prisoners, and show no mercy.

One day your Son will thank you for it. I know I would if I had the chance.

Be true to your feelings mate.

You know...

MANY divorce lawyers have said that a husband (or wife) who does NOT have custody has a good shot at changing the custody agreement if he/she can prove it is in the best interest of the child.

If you can put together a good list of reasons:

They live with HIS parents? Do you have your OWN place where your kid will have his own BEDROOM?

You get to see your kid ONCE a year? You agree (in writing) that, if you're given custody, you will allow her to have him ONE major holiday (Christmas / Thanksgiving), alternating the holiday each year AND 4 or 5 or 6 or 7 (Your choice. I say start low & work your way up) consecutive weeks in the summer, during summer break AND during Spring break. Add that the airfare expenses will be YOURS to incur (save $$ from the child support payments you'll be getting to pay for it).

Address the issue in your complaint about her moving so far away and separating the child from his father, address her unwillingness to meet half way and her lack of adherence to the visitation agreement.

Try to get a stipulation in there that hinges visitation on the successful payment of child support (good luck, though).

None of this is impossible if you get a good lawyer.

Plus, you're a cop.

You are in a GOOD field of work for someone to be friendly with. The right lawyer might be willing to take the work pro bono.


Good luck, man. I can't imagine life without my 3 kids.
I hope the best for you.



Eric

Call the Texas State Bar Association and they should have info about pro-bono or other alternatives. Most states do have Legal Aid or Legal Clinic, or both.