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**ineptus astartes**

monolith one…destroyed…monolith two….functional…flux arc: powering: target class…stormblade…>flux arc…>firing.
…

…

…

…

target status…/destroyed/…biologicals living…commander…

lord status…arrived…entering personal combat with…guard commander…

**ineptus astartes**

Mark looked out of his window and into a scene of carnage. Peering out further he said.“What are-NECRONS?” he almost screamed. “phillip walked in. “what is with you with all this damn shou-HOLY FETH! NECRONS!”

Within a minute, they had loaded up their gear and opened the door. mark had a nail gun and his fire poker. Along with a pair of water balloons filled with Lysol, and a bag that had sevral swearing minis inside

. Phillip had a water gun that was filled with the same fluid, as well as a golf club and a can of RAID.
When he looked at the battle raging all over the yard he wished he hadn’t sent his dogs to his mom’s house for the time. Selecting a Lysol balloon he flung it at the nearest of the tree monoliths, but a stray gauss flare removed the balloon bit and sent volatile fluids all over both armies.

Then it began to rain…

**Kasrkai**

Anthony found the remote to the massive vid-screen, and selected a channel called "Disney". The screen lit up to the antics of several children of questionable sexuality.

**Darkvoidof40k**

Kasrkai wrote:Anthony found the remote to the massive vid-screen, and selected a channel called "Disney". The screen lit up to the antics of several children of questionable sexuality.

My friend, you win three internets.

**ineptus astartes**

I wonder if you would make elmer fudd a saint for his 'purging of the long-eared xenos'

**Kasrkai**

As he grew disinterested in the children in make-up, he pushed the 'up' button on the remote, where he entered a channel called "Boomerang". This show contained a strange bald man, short, with a melta gun and commissar cap. The character looked to the screen and put his finger to his lips.

"SSHHHHHHHHHHHHH." he intoned. "I'm hunting Hewitics!". Thomas groaned. "What are we wat-" that was as far as he got, as Anthony's fist planted firmly into the man's face.

"SHUT YOUR WHORE MOUTH WHILE THE COMMISSAR IS WORKING."

The commissar on the screen approached a hole, wherein a Chaos Marine with unusual horns appeared, munching on a strange vegetable.

"EEEEEEEHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHh" he said, "WHATS UP COM-AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH-". Whatever he said was drowned out by the screaming from his vox, as he melted via the commissar's melta gun.

Anthony liked this show.

**Darkvoidof40k**

(I'm glad that I have no idea what you're on about Kas)

**ineptus astartes**

HA! (nice interpreting of bugs bunny)

**Darkvoidof40k**

ineptus astartes wrote:HA! (nice interpreting of bugs bunny)

I understand now!

**WARORK93**

Kern's vision shoo, he was face down on the found as he tried to pick himself up. As he stood, he saw the ruins of his beloved tank, on fire, the crew burning alive from the hit it had taken from the Monolith. All around him, his men shouted, the gunshots continued as did the strange zapping of the nercrons weaponry. Kern pulled out his power sword and activated its sparking blue field. With his other hand he found the regimental banner still clutched in his standard bearers dead hand on the ground.

The screams of his men filled his ears as did the explosions of his tanks, it was over, the line had been broken and he was goin to die here...

Not before he took some of the metallic bastards with him. Kern ran towards the nearest group of necrons and slashed his sword through one, two , three metallic bodies, cleaving them in two. He held his sword high.

"To the last man, with the last round! The Krieg way!" He yelled for anyone who may still have been alive to hear him. He turned, in front of him stood the most terrifying necron he'd ever seen, before he could swing his sword around, the thing's staff stabbed into him with cold efficiency. Kern fell to the ground, impaled, gasping. So this was how it ended, he thought.

The Necron Lord raised its staff to stab him, when quite suddenly, it began to rain, not water, but chemicals. Kern's chemical protection was suiting him well, but as his vision faded, he watched the Necron Lord begin to twitch and fizzle, it appeared the chemicals didn't agree with him. With blood spurting out of his mouth, Kern rallied his muscles for one last attack and stabbed his power sword up through the Lord's neck, chopping its head off.

Kern became still as the Necron Lord fell over, as his vision greyed out, he laughed...

Now that was the Krieg way...

**ineptus astartes**

poor Kern...

**lord commissar klimino**

(post in a sec.just got my hair cut and drove for the 1st time)

**lord commissar klimino**

death.death everywere. jumping over an ork here,using some humans as cover,dodging tau flying body parts. then it rained. as vio shot threw a few metal freaks,he saw the human commander fall with a big metal beast. "dang! dont let up men! as long as one man stands nothing is lost! for the greater good!" as the strange rain damaged those it hit,vio was careful were he stepped. "oh,feth im an idiot!" pulling out a handful of EMP grenades,he activated them and chucked them one by one. as they hit and necrons fell deactivated,vio charged forward. jump kicking one he fell back with the thing qlmost looking confused. luckily he shot it before it shot him. getting up and looking around,he saw the color giver and his friend stomping and shooting the metal monsters. "the great color giver and his friend the giant lazy one have come to are aid! we shball win this,FOR THE GREATER GOOOD!" as he charged forward,he smiled at the echo that was his troops.

**ineptus astartes**

going to bed now...'night.

**yeroc500**

Marduk laughed as he watched the decimation of the humans. The tau on the other hand were doing fine. The orks were being slaughtered. Marduk wanted the kriegsmans supplies and vehicles. The whole annoited had been assembled and been told the plan. It was a lightning strike and retrieve followed by a rapid escape. All the landraiders and rhinos had been prepared. The rhinos had battle brothers armed to retrieve vehicles, by force. "Retrieve any vehicles no matter the race", Marduk had said. He was in a landraider with his Coryphaus. The convoy wrapped arond the combat shooting at necrons but not anyone else. Then thy stopped when they got to the kriegsman lines. The annoited jumped out of the vehicles and jumped into the tight trenches. Their bulk allowed only two to travel down the trench at a time. Kol-Badar laughed as he backstabbed the kriegsman and slaughtered them. The combat was so thick that no one noticed the terminators until it was to late. The vehicles which had been held back to keep the them intact were practically unharmed, but the chimeras had sped forward at the beginning of combat were lying as burning husks from the necron. Marduk impaled a guardsmen on the spike of his crozius. The capture teams were just getting to the vehicles. Marduk watched one team open up a leman russ and torch the crewman. Screams could be heard as the crew died. This was happening all down the line. Ten minutes later and it was heating down. The necron were slowly killed. The tau sustained minor damage using range against the short ranged necrons. The orks were unknown because of their numbers. The kriegsman were halved. And had lost all their vehicles. The chaos gained ten leman russes and twenty basilicas. They had retreated around the battle and were already on their way back to the base. Marduk smiled as he looked at the head of the commisar.

**lord commissar klimino**

vio looked around.they had won. the necrons were either dead or retreating. heading back he sees the dead human commander. "men,bring his body to the garden. a brave warrior like him deserves to be buried." continuing,he sees a chaos terminator in the trench. "*com* men,this fight might not be over. dark humans in the trench. if they attack kill them." turning around,vio heads to were most of his remaining forces have gathered. "good job men,how are are losses?"
"heavy shas'O'vio,very heavy. one tank left and only 1 broadside team left.plus infantry is dropped massively..."
"understood. gather what guns and ammo you can and take them back to HQ with us." then turning to the giants,vio said "great color giver,great lazy one,we thank you for your help." and with that,the tau gathered what they could and went back to the HQ.

(whats left of my army from all the battles...:/

16 tau fire warriors(2 teams),12 human fire warriors(1 teams),34 kroot(3 teams),8 kroot riders (2 teams),7 kroot hounds(1 teams).

4 XV15 (1 team),5 XV25 (1 teams), 4 XV8 (2 teams).

6 vespid (1 team),3 pathfinder w/rails (1 teams).

1 hammerheads,3 broadsides (1 teams) )

**ineptus astartes**

Boss Blastgunz was setting up his new kamp overlooking the kreigsmens old trenches. He had gotten most of the vehicles and equipment including a fair bunch of new tankz he was trying out his new gun that he had taken from of off them ‘chaoz champeeunz’ and several of the vehicles torn off stormbolters hung at his hips.

He ha managed to salvage the min gun, secondary rector and chassis of the stormblade and was having it refitted with a backup diesel engine for ‘more powa’ along with bolting on some dozer blades. His thousands of boyz were now each armed to the teef and the gretchin were learning how to use the ‘zakka gunz’ taken from the kreigsmen while the tau gear was joyfully torn apart and reassembled by the big mechs some of the shiny boyz gunz had been taken but most of them had disappeared along with the shiny boyz themselves. Peering down at the chaos boyz looting the trenches below him, he lit a cigar, and took a deep draw.

now all he needed to do was se if Gork and Mork were going to give the boyz sum help wit their flash. he hd see the two rampaging through the battlefield, as big as gargants.

**yeroc500**

Marduk gleemed at his armor from the walls of his base. They had managed to salvage two chimeras and a single tau tank (of what varient was uknown for it had no turret). The leman russ's were being disassembled to make something. And the basilicas were being placed into position. Except for ten which were also being disassembled. Marduk was going to reserve the tau tank for himself. He like the tau and their advance tech. He grinned as he saw darioq-grendh'al looking through the vehicle bone yard. He knew that the tech daemon was going to make something awesome.

**ineptus astartes**

“oi! Boss!”’ called blstgunz to Gork. “Yoo wan us ta krup anyfin?” as a warboss, he could speak freely to the gods, while the others bowed and scraped. “What?” thundered the massive Gork “no, not at the moment…exept, try killing the last of the shiny boyz.” Blastgunz grinned. “Soz kin we WHAAAGH!!!?” Mark rolled his eyes. “whaaagh to your heart’s content.”
“WWHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!” came the howl from the greenskins, as the charged into the jungle, with their new flash pounding away at the soulless warriors.
**********************************************************************************************
“hay! Yelled big nob Warork, as they returned, pointing at the chaos lines. “dyez got sum of Flash!” “kalm ya thrustas Warork it just dere haul ‘o da loot, we gotz mor anywayz," said Flashgunz "anyways, dat is just-just-just a-a-a parsnip-wait no…parlay? Nuh-uh…parlsely? Nope…pilfering?...cant be, dats anuvver wor fer lootin roit? Gee…whuts da wurd…oh, yeah! PALTRY! Dat it! PALTRY sum!”

**Darkvoidof40k**

In the humongous bedroom, a single silver figure crouched; hidden. He scanned the area for hostiles and potential threats. He found none. With that, he sprinted across the open ground as fast as he could before reaching his target - a blade of unrivalled value that had been left behind by accident. Justicar Sontaro reached the revered blade, which hummed ominously with hidden power. He was about to pick it up when his super human senses noticed something. He spun on the spot, raising his left arm and releasing a hail of high-calibre explosive shots as he did so. A line of Moria Goblins dropped, but dozens more charged, screaming madly.

Sontaro charged, roaring a battlecry of his own, a hateful curse upon his lips as he continued to gun down the humanoid greenskins. Arrows impacted and broke upon his steadfast ceramite battleplate as .75 calibre Bolter shells found their mark and detonated within the charging Goblins. Soon they met, crude iron and steel clashing with annointed blade. Sontaro cut down enemy after enemy, expertly dispatching them in a whirlwind of fury. His crackling Nemesis Force Sword was more than a match for the Goblin weaponry and it cut straight through them with ease. Those that managed to get past his guard found their weapons inaffective against his armor. In less than a minute, the Goblins were dead. Sontaro's armor was drenched in blood - none of it his own. He gathered up the Titansword, holding it reverently, before returning from whence he came.

**TrollPie**

Yarrick and his army returned to the humongous bedroom, the Armaggedoners trailing behind him in a line. The wounded were carried in stretchers in the Chimeras.
"Ok, now let's have a casualty report. How many dead?" A Sergeant ran up to him and responded.
"27 Guardsmen killed, and 17 tank crewmen."
"Vehicles?"
"2 Battle Tanks, a Chimera and a Hydra. 3 Basilisks are badly damaged and the Demolisher is out of ammo."
"May they go with the Emporer. Have the Scouts spotted anywhere to resupply?" he asked.
"Yes, a large building full of what appear to be uniform grey ammo pieces and weaponry. There's even some plastic arms, for reasons I can't imagine." Yarrick frowned at this.
"What daemonic experiments has this heretic Mark performed? And to think I almost became his friend. Why did I even do that? Emporer help me. How far is this store room?"
"About a kilometer, by our reconning."
"Good. Let us leave at once." As they left the bedroom, avoiding the body pieces strewn across the floor, they spotted an odd figure; a hulking, silver armoured man covered in strange symbols, leaving the room. Yarrick recognised him immediately.
"Grey Knights. If they've been called in, then this place must truly be infested with filth. We best not disturb him." The men walked past, casting odd looks at the mysterious man.

After 20 minutes of walking, they found the building, and resupplied. Thankfully, they encountered little trouble on the journey; they spotted the daemon-Dog wandering around, but aside from that there was little evidence of the day's carnage.

**Darkvoidof40k**

(TrollPie, I would appreciate it if you did three things:
1) Spelled good ol' Sebastian Yarrick's name correctly.
2) Roleplayed him a tad bit more realistically. A big tad.
3) Not drag my characters around when they've already left the scene.

That is all.

)

**TrollPie**

(Oops, sorry. Fixed it now.
And everything else. Sorry.)

**ineptus astartes**

New bases and upgrades

(NOTE: ONLY ONE UPGRADE PER SQUAD/VEHIVCLE

(Note armored forces are displayed at the bottom)

Orks (1000 troops): garden, desert, tree roots (4 upgrades
available)

Steel legion (200 troops): basement (0 upgrades available)

Death Korps of Krieg: (70 troops,) under the hydrangea bush (2 upgrades available)

Zoats: (full strength) wallspace of the guest room.(0 upgrades)

Kasrkin: (5 men) basement (2 upgrades)

Chaos marines (150 CSMs 39 daemons) garage (1 upgrade)

Tau: 2 (firewarrior units. 3 stealthsuits 23 kroot 4 vespid) sunroom (6 upgrades)

Tanith: bedroom [modeling corner] (upgrades 1)

Grey knights (one termie killed by swarm of rats.) bathroom cupboard (upgrades 1 {psilencer})

Angry marines: yard (6 angries)

necrons: relocated to the sewers (2000 troops) (upgrades 2

[temple to pylon. scarabs to tomb stalkers]

Armor:

DKoK: 2 leman russ 1 hydra

Ork: lots uvv em!

Yarric: 3 sentinels

Tau: 0

Kasrkin: thunderhawk

Chaos marines: 2 landraiders. 1 hades drill. 1 chimera. 1

leman russ. 4 rhinos. 6 predators.

GK: dreads

THE AVAILABLE UPGRADES FOR THE VARIOUS FORCES WILL BE POSTED MOMENTARILY.

**ineptus astartes**

hello?

**TrollPie**

Yes?

**TrollPie**

I think I'll take the 3 sentinels and move in to the basement, thank you very much.

**ineptus astartes**

I belive you are already in the basment.

**TrollPie**

Oh yeah, with the bitz box. I forgot where it was for a second.

**ineptus astartes**

NOTE: all units start with no special weapons or drones/supports