29 Reasons You're A Warhammer Player without images. (Edited for clarity. Comments with ((double parenthesis)) are mine)

You dither for days before choosing your faction and are immediately disappointed with your choice, especially when you are getting stomped by an army of [Skaven]. You are creative enough to make sure that you have a board ready to go at a moment's notice or have enough chutzpah to convince your significant other you need [a dedicated gaming table]. You call [a Games Workshop store] your second home and are immediately annoyed when people come into the shop to play Catan. You consider Chaos players ((not pictured)) the lowest form of life because not only are they hideously overpowered but they have [odd looking figurines] lying around the house. You avidly discuss your greatest victories at tournaments but are quick to discount your losses (or the game) as "cheap". You are jealous when someone breaks out the hottest new units so you up the ante by purchasing your own prohibitively expensive piece.
You refer to people who don't paint as "dabblers" and won't let them into tournament play. You, however, obsess about the color scheme of your army. You spend days relearning ancient skills such as paper mache so someday your terrain can look [good] even though the end result will most likely [look poor]. You have an impressive knowledge of geometry ((You know how to measure things and divide! Nerd alert! -Me)) since that comes in handy when casting spells. When the chips are down you have no problems being spiteful, magnanimous or just plain jubilant that you snatched victory from the jaws of defeat because there will always be another game, another figure to purchase, another Chaos player ((also not pictured)) because otherwise you might find yourself playing warmachine or simply give up and start playing blood bowl.