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Made in us
Longtime Dakkanaut





I wouldn't immediately cease interacting with the individual whenever possible. How exactly depends on their level integration with my larger circle of friends:

A) No Integration: Tell them off privately, cut contact.
B) Low level of integration, lower social position than me: Tell them off publicly, calling out specifics on why everyone else should cut them off. Cut contact.
C) High level of integration, lower social position than me: Do not tell them off. Point out why they're horrible in private to others, until driven out of group. Cut contact.
D) Low level of integration, equal or higher social position than me: Do nothing else, cut off contact where possible. Ignore at larger social events.
E) High level of integration, equal or higher social position than me: Do nothing else, cut off contact where possible. Be polite at larger social events. Consider new group of friends (what kind of idiots love that kind of idiot?)

This message was edited 2 times. Last update was at 2014/02/03 16:03:54


 
   
Made in ca
Rampaging Carnifex




West Coast, Canada

 Seaward wrote:
I'm curious why you talk politics with your friends frequently enough for it to be an issue.

I have close friends who think things like Canadian socialism are good ideas. I manage to tolerate their presence because we rarely talk shop like that.


In socialist Canada, the white house burns you down!

Seriously, Canada's super. Health care? Yes. Education? Just had 4 years of university paid for by the Man, thanks. Also, employment insurance, proper old age pensions (ok, they're a bit small, lol!), and we have British Columbia (read, hydroelectric power supplied to most of Western Usa). So, you're welcome. Cheers!

   
Made in nl
Pragmatic Primus Commanding Cult Forces






He dislikes German people? Kill him!
Also, Indians are not greedy. At least, not when compared to the Dutch.

Error 404: Interesting signature not found

 
   
Made in jp
Enigmatic Sorcerer of Chaos






 Cheesecat wrote:
stereotypes women as being

indecisive, lazy, overly sensitive and manipulative.


Well, he's half right.
   
Made in us
Infiltrating Hawwa'





Through the looking glass

Me and my group make racist jokes all the time. Thing is my group encompasses a bunch of those races. Point is if you're not offending someone, then it's not funny.

However, I do believe that some of my family is legitimately racist, like racist remarks without anything being funny, and I just sort of pity them and call them out on it and a mocking tone. It's not like you can change that over night, and it's not something I have time to do anyways.

“Sometimes I can hear my bones straining under the weight of all the lives I'm not living.”

― Jonathan Safran Foer 
   
Made in ca
Fixture of Dakka




Kamloops, BC

I don't mind racial humour (in fact if it's done right it can be quite funny), but this friend was being serious about the things he said.
   
Made in us
Infiltrating Hawwa'





Through the looking glass

 Cheesecat wrote:
I don't mind racial humour (in fact if it's done right it can be quite funny), but this friend was being serious about the things he said.


Yeahhhhh time to get a new friend. It's not like you can show him that he's doing the formula wrong and everything clicks and suddenly he has an acceptable attitude.

“Sometimes I can hear my bones straining under the weight of all the lives I'm not living.”

― Jonathan Safran Foer 
   
Made in us
Secret Force Behind the Rise of the Tau




USA

I find watching American History X with racists to be quite entertaining. They always get this goofball look up until the ending, and then they harp about how they were right all along.

This message was edited 1 time. Last update was at 2014/02/04 05:37:09


   
Made in za
Maniacal Gibbering Madboy






If he's a good friend, try and overlook his faults. After all, Cartman is not completely responsible for his actions - Trey and Matt are always putting words in his mouth
   
Made in us
Steady Space Marine Vet Sergeant





Believeland, OH



Never heard that version before, I like it, but not better than this.




I once found out a lacrosse teammate of mine was racist, he actually asked me if I wanted to go burn some crosses after we had been drinking one night. I really thought he was joking as he seamed to get along well with some of the black players on my team. His response was that the black kids on our team were cool, or some special case or something. Once I found out how he really felt, I booted him out of my car. I didn't out him to the rest of the team, but people saw that we didn't get along anymore. Guess he didn't know I was a leader of Antiracist Action at my university.


"I don't have principles, and I consider any comment otherwise to be both threatening and insulting" - Dogma

"No, sorry, synonymous does not mean same".-Dogma

"If I say "I will hug you" I am threatening you" -Dogma 
   
Made in se
Regular Dakkanaut




The far north

Tell him off, and tell him that he makes you uncomfortable. There is not much more that you can do. If it continues like this you will probably just glide apart from each other any way. No relationship is unconditional, especially friendship. You will realise that sooner and later.

I

geekandgarden.wordpress.com 
   
Made in ca
Lord of the Fleet






Halifornia, Nova Scotia

Personally, I can't be friends with people who hold such views of people around them. My time is better spent with people who's company I also enjoy that I don't feel embarrassed around or need to listen to a racist commentary.

Basically, life's too short.

Take from that what you will.

Mordian Iron Guard - Major Overhaul in Progress

+Spaceship Gaming Enthusiast+

Live near Halifax, NS? Ask me about our group, the Ordo Haligonias! 
   
Made in au
Longtime Dakkanaut




Squatting with the squigs

If you are finding it a problem I suggest next time you are with him you go into a long winded nonsensical rant about people who share one of his attributes to try and show him how incredibly stupid he sounds.

Alternately get suitable retorts to his bs - taking our jobs - many migrants take up the menial jobs that our existing citizens with the over emphasis on university education do not wish to take or are over qualified for. Or alternately in order to keep following the economic theory that seems to be held in the most regard , the economy must continue to expand meaning the consumer base needs to expand so migrants are actually making jobs for Canadians.

Or best option. next time he rants on about indians being greedy reply with " people are people, there are witches in every society and right now you are being a witch.

My new blog: http://kardoorkapers.blogspot.com.au/

Manchu - "But so what? The Bible also says the flood destroyed the world. You only need an allegorical boat to tackle an allegorical flood."

Shespits "Anything i see with YOLO has half naked eleventeen year olds Girls. And of course booze and drugs and more half naked elventeen yearolds Girls. O how i wish to YOLO again!"

Rubiksnoob "Next you'll say driving a stick with a Scandinavian supermodel on your lap while ripping a bong impairs your driving. And you know what, I'M NOT GOING TO STOP, YOU FILTHY COMMUNIST" 
   
Made in ca
Excellent Exalted Champion of Chaos






Grim Forgotten Nihilist Forest.

If they drive you crazy. I reckon it's just time to move on.

It's what i've had to do a few times.

I've sold so many armies. :(
Aeldari 3kpts
Slaves to Darkness.3k
Word Bearers 2500k
Daemons of Chaos

 
   
Made in gb
Insect-Infested Nurgle Chaos Lord







Trade him in for a Racy & Sexy friend.

   
Made in nl
Rogue Grot Kannon Gunna





The Netherlands

I disagree with most of the fellowDakkites here as I think you should value the friendship regardless of his views; You should stay friends with him if he is, other than his views, a good friend. You just have to make sure when he rants on about racism, you tell him that you are not ok with it and that he must not discuss it with you. He is entitled on his own opinion, how wrong it may be. Just let him have his views without involving you.

Racists are almost always hypocritical while they don't mind co-workers or team-mates to be of a different race as they are "special different", as Andrew1975 already said, yet they think everyone else is very bad. They are very narrow minded individuals.




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Death Guard 1.0: 8,500 points painted (Pics available in Gallery) P: 7 W: 1 D: 3 L: 3
Death Guard 2.0 "Plaguepigs": 4,250 points painted P:4 W:3 D:0 L: 1
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Tyranids: 2,000 points painted
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Made in nl
Decrepit Dakkanaut






 Low_K wrote:
I disagree with most of the fellowDakkites here as I think you should value the friendship regardless of his views; You should stay friends with him if he is, other than his views, a good friend. You just have to make sure when he rants on about racism, you tell him that you are not ok with it and that he must not discuss it with you. He is entitled on his own opinion, how wrong it may be. Just let him have his views without involving you.

Racists are almost always hypocritical while they don't mind co-workers or team-mates to be of a different race as they are "special different", as Andrew1975 already said, yet they think everyone else is very bad. They are very narrow minded individuals.





I can't think of any logical reason to tolerate racism and sexism. Unless it's really funny.
   
Made in nl
Rogue Grot Kannon Gunna





The Netherlands

 Soladrin wrote:
I can't think of any logical reason to tolerate racism and sexism. Unless it's really funny.


You can try and get the thoughts out of his head by staying friends. He is still relatively young and isn't so "worldly" I think, him being a bit of an outcast as I understand from the OP. This is most likely the reason he thinks this way. If he gets older and meets other people in a job of different ethnicity, have a girlfriend even, his views will change quick as he will come to understand that not all of the foreigners are as bad as he thinks they are. It is always easy to stereotype racial groups because of a few "rotten apples", as you know we like to do here in Holland with Moroccan people for instance, which is wrong while I have many Moroccan colleagues in Security who are all nice and friendly guys.

If I had a friend like him and he didn't bother me with his skewed views, and he was a good friend, I wouldn't give up on him. His views will change and when he gets older, he will see that his views are pathetic and wrong. Still, they stay his views and he is entitled to them, and shouldn't be put in isolation for having these views. The OP just needs to tell him that he disagrees with his views and ignore him when he rants on about them, telling him to quit ranting around him.

This message was edited 1 time. Last update was at 2014/02/07 11:33:22


Russian Rebel Grots : 6,500 points painted P: 8 W: 2 D: 5 L: 1
Death Guard 1.0: 8,500 points painted (Pics available in Gallery) P: 7 W: 1 D: 3 L: 3
Death Guard 2.0 "Plaguepigs": 4,250 points painted P:4 W:3 D:0 L: 1
Thousand Sons: 3,750 points painted P:1 W:1 D:0 L:0
Nurgle Daemons: 3,800 points painted P:2 W:1 D:1 L:0
Tyranids: 2,000 points painted
Primaris "Honoured Mastodons": 3,700 points painted
Tallarn Desert Raiders 2,000 points painted Tau 6,750 points painted 
   
Made in nl
Decrepit Dakkanaut






 Low_K wrote:
 Soladrin wrote:
I can't think of any logical reason to tolerate racism and sexism. Unless it's really funny.


You can try and get the thoughts out of his head by staying friends. He is still relatively young and isn't so "worldly" I think, him being a bit of an outcast as I understand from the OP. This is most likely the reason he thinks this way. If he gets older and meets other people in a job of different ethnicity, have a girlfriend even, his views will change quick as he will come to understand that not all of the foreigners are as bad as he thinks they are. It is always easy to stereotype racial groups because of a few "rotten apples", as you know we like to do here in Holland with Moroccan people for instance, which is wrong while I have many Moroccan colleagues in Security who are all nice and friendly guys.

If I had a friend like him and he didn't bother me with his skewed views, and he was a good friend, I wouldn't give up on him. His views will change and when he gets older, he will see that his views are pathetic and wrong. Still, they stay his views and he is entitled to them, and shouldn't be put in isolation for having these views. The OP just needs to tell him that he disagrees with his views and ignore him when he rants on about them, telling him to quit ranting around him.


But stereotyping is so much fun! I mean come on, we've pretty much made it into a sport.

Look, I love racist, sexist and offensive jokes, a lot, but someone who is the actual thing and believes in the bs they fling doesn't deserve a minute of my time, they are inferior beings.
   
Made in gb
Sneaky Lictor





Unfortunately your friend is bipolar so he's often going to be a different thinker. I know two people like that, one i'm close friends with. But my friend consistently goes on about how others are lazy for not caring about the 3rd world. But fails to see the selfishness in his actions (not related to his beliefs), but yet is a nice guy.

With these people you just have to take it in your stride. If you've already told him how it is, then you've just got to concentrate on why you're friends, because he's nice/ caring/ shares interests etc.

Maybe when he visits the "real world" he'll see past his previous beliefs and just get on with life. But if he's always feeling sorry for himself and feels the world is against him, maybe he will just go on life like that and become a loner. There's only so much you can do to help people. If he's being racist/ insulting in public, all you have to do is say "dude stop ^**(^&$*( talking like that", with the swearing included to make your point known.

I have another friend who is overly aggressive and racist. But when he started hanging around with my riding buddies he saw that we weren't like that and slowly became less like his previous self. I don't know why, but he did. Once when he saw some eastern Asian students in a large group walking past, he said a pretty nasty statement about them going back to their country, within a few feet away. I just laughed and said, "you can't say that". If anything became of it, i would of been in my friend's face telling him to back down, because he was in the wrong.

Hopefully that helps somewhat

Da Boss wrote:
Popular stops mattering pretty soon btw, so that's something to look forward to


This is 100% true. You get to do work politics next, that's even more fun!

I joke of course. Jobs vary, and you can leave them.
   
Made in nl
Rogue Grot Kannon Gunna





The Netherlands

 Soladrin wrote:
But stereotyping is so much fun! I mean come on, we've pretty much made it into a sport.




Soladrin wrote:Look, I love racist, sexist and offensive jokes, a lot, but someone who is the actual thing and believes in the bs they fling doesn't deserve a minute of my time, they are inferior beings.


I doubt he really believes it. Maybe he was raised with these thoughts, and now believes it because he doesn't know the other side. He will have to face working with different ethnicity groups when he gets a job and his views will change, I am sure of it. If he is a good friend, why give up on him when there is still hope? If he starts physically assaulting ethnic groups then it is time to break off the friendship, but destroying a good friendship over different views, how wrong they may be, is taken it a bit too far. If the OP would break the friendship off, maybe his friend will find a new friend who thinks the same and it will go from bad to worse.

I disagree about them being inferiour while it is a dangerous road you then take while you go towards the same thinking as the racists who also think they are superiour to other people. I think they are un-worldly, hence, don't understand how the world works. They are not lost, especially not on that age.

Regarding the sexist part;

I always wonder if people are being sexist, if they also think like that of their own mother.







This message was edited 1 time. Last update was at 2014/02/07 11:51:41


Russian Rebel Grots : 6,500 points painted P: 8 W: 2 D: 5 L: 1
Death Guard 1.0: 8,500 points painted (Pics available in Gallery) P: 7 W: 1 D: 3 L: 3
Death Guard 2.0 "Plaguepigs": 4,250 points painted P:4 W:3 D:0 L: 1
Thousand Sons: 3,750 points painted P:1 W:1 D:0 L:0
Nurgle Daemons: 3,800 points painted P:2 W:1 D:1 L:0
Tyranids: 2,000 points painted
Primaris "Honoured Mastodons": 3,700 points painted
Tallarn Desert Raiders 2,000 points painted Tau 6,750 points painted 
   
Made in nl
Decrepit Dakkanaut






 Low_K wrote:
 Soladrin wrote:
But stereotyping is so much fun! I mean come on, we've pretty much made it into a sport.




Soladrin wrote:Look, I love racist, sexist and offensive jokes, a lot, but someone who is the actual thing and believes in the bs they fling doesn't deserve a minute of my time, they are inferior beings.


I doubt he really believes it. Maybe he was raised with these thoughts, and now believes it because he doesn't know the other side. He will have to face working with different ethnicity groups when he gets a job and his views will change, I am sure of it. If he is a good friend, why give up on him when there is still hope? If he starts physically assaulting ethnic groups then it is time to break off the friendship, but destroying a good friendship over different views, how wrong they may be, is taken it a bit too far. If the OP would break the friendship off, maybe his friend will find a new friend who thinks the same and it will go from bad to worse.

I disagree about them being inferiour while it is a dangerous road you then take while you go towards the same thinking as the racists who also think they are superiour to other people. I think they are un-worldly, hence, don't understand how the world works. They are not lost, especially not on that age.

Regarding the sexist part;

I always wonder if people are being sexist, if they also think like that of their own mother.




The inferior thing was a joke about racism being stupid.

And my point here I guess is, to me the OP sounded like he'd already given up and it's a bit of a lost cause, in which case you're probably better off cutting ties to prevent yourself getting unneeded stress. Now if it's more a case of gakky upbringing and just being arse, yeah, you can probably to get through to him.
   
Made in nl
Rogue Grot Kannon Gunna





The Netherlands

 Soladrin wrote:
The inferior thing was a joke about racism being stupid.

And my point here I guess is, to me the OP sounded like he'd already given up and it's a bit of a lost cause, in which case you're probably better off cutting ties to prevent yourself getting unneeded stress. Now if it's more a case of gakky upbringing and just being arse, yeah, you can probably to get through to him.


Ah yes, I did suspect it was meant as a joke regarding the inferiour part, but wasn't sure

Usually racists are made by the parents due to their upbringing. But views can change.

I am glad we can have a discussion about this topic without it getting ugly.


Russian Rebel Grots : 6,500 points painted P: 8 W: 2 D: 5 L: 1
Death Guard 1.0: 8,500 points painted (Pics available in Gallery) P: 7 W: 1 D: 3 L: 3
Death Guard 2.0 "Plaguepigs": 4,250 points painted P:4 W:3 D:0 L: 1
Thousand Sons: 3,750 points painted P:1 W:1 D:0 L:0
Nurgle Daemons: 3,800 points painted P:2 W:1 D:1 L:0
Tyranids: 2,000 points painted
Primaris "Honoured Mastodons": 3,700 points painted
Tallarn Desert Raiders 2,000 points painted Tau 6,750 points painted 
   
 
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