I know little about the Armies on Parade tourny, for apologies of my advise is off.
I'd drop the termie chaplin, normal dreadnought, techmarine, scout squad, assault squad and pred.
Add, Venerable dread from Forge World - looks fething awesome for salamanders.
Add another tactical squad, woth rhino.
change
LRC to
LRR. makes more sense.
Throw in maybe a devastator squad with a few
MM and a drop pod.
Add Thunderfire cannons.
Its a huge change and would totally understand if you told me to jog on, but the only thing so far you have that screams salamanders is vulkan and his termies.
hope it works out
*EDIT*
Here is the link for the Forge World Dread:
http://www.forgeworld.co.uk/Warhammer-40000/Space_Marines/Space-Marine-Dreadnoughts/SALAMANDERS-VENERABLE-DREADNOUGHT-BRAYARTH-ASHMANTLE_BODY.html
I think a show army would be awesome! Post pics when your done!!