Regular Dakkanaut
Wakefield
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ROIGHT YA PUNY LITTLE HUMIES, THIS BE THA' TALE O' IMMORKAN JO', HERALD O' MORK (OR GORK), AND HOW OL' JOE SHALL DELUVA US BOYZ T'A CRIMSON-SHINED ORKHALLA T'RIDE NON STOP AN' FIGHT.[b]
So....I got the Mad Max fever for some UNKNOWN reason, and I thought to myself...Those Warboyz and Ol' Jo were badass...But I want MORE! So how do I get more? Go to tha' dakkiest, fightiest, craziest squid-'eads round tha' whole galaxy! ORKZ. They gat tha' best guns, bestest trukks an' tha' baggest bangs t'get this train a rolling! So how would I mix these two lovable, crazy factions together? Just watch...
Immorkan Jo' (HERALD OF GORK (OR MORK)) was in fact just known as Da' Colonel before his rise to his current statues, leading a furious splinter group from the Evil Sunz into Imperial Terrirtory, hoping to entertain tha' lads for some time before they really got tha' plan for his WAAAAAAGH kicked off, and to gather a few extra tools and dakka to make sure his krew were quick, red and PUMPED. However....Ork engineering was not the finest...Or it was simply Da' Colonel's Plan after all....That the first planet they came near to? Some lonely production world? They just plowed into it with their ship. Whatever small barricade was formed in space was utterly crushed or split from the fight when the steaming 'CHARGA' ship instead opted for the crude manner of landing upon the planet. Needless to say, many Orks died, many humies died yada yada yada....BUT, Da' Colonel made it alive, gathering the rest of his warband to plunge themselves into this new world to kill, maim, destroy, loot, kill a little more, maybe guzzle some squig brew, kick a gretchin, then do a little more looting and the cycle begins again! However, unknown to Da' Colonel, leaving a hulking ship in the middle of a planet, filled with horribly toxic technology and the filth of Orks, was not a beneficial addition to this world, and it displayed itself soon after. The land was dying. The land was becoming too barren for crops to grow, starvation prominent throughout the planet' sectors, and with less people, meant less workers, and less workers meant no one was running the fuel factories and manning the defences, and the warfare of Da' Colonel, almost Total War with how crude vehicles laid waste to the ground, making what was once a simple grassland or hills and mountains into that of wastelands, plagued by sand and toxic dirt. The Orks and their ship were killing the land and their people, and Da' Colonel soon thought...Something was up.
Whilst tha' humies were being smacked 'round a good bit, Orks were dyin' quick, ether from the toxic air that began to linger or from warfare, an' not 'nough were sprouting back up; sure Da' Colonel was beating the humies, but he was beating himself. Without a decent ship to transport his Mob and vehicles to begin his WAAAAGH, he used his cunnin' to do a slight Un-Orky thing. Make a base. Orks were getting feisty, an' he had more than the usual few a day comin' t'challenge him as Warboss of this Mob. His 'Loot-Tenonts' Da' Ork Gobbler an' Da' Dakka Horda told 'im they found a base held up by tha' humies, still clean 'nough for tha' Boyz an' enough space for his trucks, an' best of all...'Nough life and space there to keep producing what be keeping his boyz in line. Squigs. Squigs fit tha' essential of his Boyz' lives, with Squig brew, stew an'...Milk. They kept tha' Boyz happy 'nough, and without 'em, he couldn't smack 'nough 'eads to keep 'em all in line. So with a rev of tha' 'Big Foot o' Gork', his own personal vehicle, he zoomed down to this base, only to be greeted by the imposing sights of colossal, natural stone towers, where much of tha' Humie Resistance in this planet's sector lay.
Tha' fighting was rough, boyz were dying, an' they couldn't peel tha' humies out, an' with no use of their Kars, they were at a disadvantage when comapred with the defenders among tha' towering stone base of the remaining guard, stubborn in their hold. But Da' Colonel had a plan. Taking some of his best Nobz, leaving Dakka Horda an' Ork Gobbla behind t'keep tha' lads in line an' fighting, Da' Colonel shot a gretchin up the side of the mountain, attached with enough chains to support the small number of Da' Colonel an' his five ladz after the Gretchin, (A trustworthy...Ish...Gob called Toe Nibbla) tied it round where he landed. With a mad toothy girn to put a Bad Moon to shame and the cunnin' an' skills to leave the Blood Axez scratching their heads, Da' Colonel an' his lads climbed up, an' into the breach they went. For several days, the Boyz an' da' Loot-Tenonts below waited, idly shooting up fleeing guard or each, however on each day, a fresh Nob was tossed down from the Rocky base, and into the mob of Boyz. For five days, there was a fresh nob broken and mangled against the floor, and the Boyz morale began tp waver, infighting beginning to swell and arguments over what to do were happening more often.
Then came the Sixth Day, silence, and as the Boyz thought to move onwards to find moar hummies was a sound choice, there came the Colonel. His body caked in crimson from head to toe, his powerclaw torn and broken and his face a mess of scars and missing teeth, with a freshly plucked officer's medals slapped against the chest, stuck with the thick blood. Orkz roared with approval. Their Warboss, surviving an entire base of Guard as his own personal bodyguards had mysteriously perished, but the Orkz were not too cunning to fit the pieces together, and began hooting and calling Da' Colonel by a different name,
"IMMORKAL! IMMORKAL! IMMORKAL!" Since Immortal was so overrated anyhow. Whilst the Guard would later just regard him as just the Warboss Immorkan Jo', the Orks revered him as near a Herald of their Gods, someone to lead them into the best WAAAAGH of their bleeding lives. Orkz that split earlier, spread across the world, began to converge on the base Immorka Jo' began to refer to as his 'Kitadal'. A place so high Orkz believe he could converse with Mork and Gork themselves. Orkz took to showing their devotion to tha; Biggest, Nastiest Ork on tha' planet, coating themselves in red paint or fresh blood in honour of his bloody return, vehicles and parts scrounged from around the sector and from their crashed ship, building back the true might of the Mob so that Immorkan Jo' can build back his WAAAAGH, keep his squig farms, with his precious....Personal squigs....Safe, t'keep tha' boys in line. Whilst tha' Ork Gobbla fetched him his gas, and the Dakka Horda hauled him 'nough Dakka to make a a Skull Boy weep. Orkz became Warboys, and they believed that if they died for Immorkan Jo', dying on the road in their bizarre behicles in glorious, dirty, nasty battle...That Immorkan Jo' himself would take them to Orkhalla, a place supposedly told to Immorkan Jo' when up in the base on his bloody Six Days.
Immorkan Jo' was more than happy to have his Warboyz and Loot-Tenonts bring him back to his full power in tha' barren wastes of what he brought upon this Planet's area, and to eventually build a ship large enough to take him off this stinking rok and spread His Word across the Boyz, and perhaps one day...Make a Galaxy-Wide WAAAAAGH to rival even that of Ghazgul himself. But first. Get. Off. This. Stinking. Rok.
((WELL! That was tiring! Tried my best to connect it with the Mad Max lore, with suitably Orky traits and some believability in this mad, mad world of 40K XD It will likely...Certainly...Have mistakes in it, so anything to help clean this up will be fantastic! AND YES, I will be creating this army, expect, when I have the cash, to forge this army, with lottsa sweet rides an' plenty of WARBOYZ round 'ere))
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Already in plan! At first, I tempted by conversion, but I'll be happy with Goff Rockas right now XD In fact, I have a small list so far of what would be useful to convert with of course to make these bizarre vehicles!
