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Ok, so, some exposition here. Im giddy about the new tau release, so im kinda sharing it. I have some 40k friends on FB so when i got the riptide ordered i posted that i got it. I posted a link and pic to the model to show my 40k friends.
But my cousin saw it. Now my cousin is married, struggling(not really, he still has plenty of money,just not for the things he) with two young girls. He saw it, clicked the link and saw the price. He is now shaming me for spending "85$ on plastic crap" and gloating about it. Im not gloating, i just wanted my friends to see what i got.
I tried to explain to him even more what it was for like how i use it for a game where I use my other models, but know he is just being mean saying things like
"y'know my girls will never be able to afford this" or things like "Why dont you put it in savings(as a note, i put 100$ in savings each month)" and even how i should be focused on school.
Its starting a grind me, i dont like being shamed for my hobby.
So i have to wonder. Does anyone else ever get shamed for playing 40k? or feel guilty? Sometimes i do.

And how much is a child? Choices my friend....choices

Not really.

Tell him to grow up and feth off He has no right to hector you on how YOU spend YOUR money

I paint my orks at my desk at work on my lunch. Got some odd looks at first (as i moved jobs recently), but after 6 months people just kind of accept it.

I've had people tell me that orks are Satanic (lord knows what they would make of my all-nurgle Daemons ) or that i'm wasting my money, but its still none of their fething business.

I've been wargaming since i was seven, and i'm old now Not likely i'll change.

I used to get this a lot when I was a younger man, hell I still get it now from my co-workers and some of my friends and family.

Things like:

'How can you spend so much on little plastic men?'
'You know people think you are a weirdo spending time and money on stuff like that?'
'waste of money and time'

My response to most of these:

Feth Off.

And here is why, it is a hobby and something I personally care about, I'm not ashamed to admit, without 40k and wargames in general, I would have no friends and no social life to speak of. This hobby has become a big a part of my life as my work and everything else, so I have no shame for what I do because it is something I care about.

My hobby may seem weird and expensive to some, but to me it is pretty much everything and no stranger than some other people and their hobbies. Hell I know a guy who makes a hobby out of breeding/clipping sheep, it's all he cares about, talks about and spends money on.

If you asked me to spend my time or money with my hand inside an animal or in a social environment with my friends playing wargames, I can tell you what I'd pick everytime.

I'm not saying there is anything wrong with his hobby, quite the opposite, people are different and what seems stupid to some means a lot to others, there is no shame in doing something that you care about. Provided its legal/safe etc

I get some flak out of the hobby in the work as I do my base spraying in there. "What are these, little plastic toys? You gotta be kidding..." And especially after they hear about the price and amount of time they take. And then they go off talking how last weekend they used 6000€ and 20 hours of work on new motor for their racing cars that havent even moved yet Everyone has their own thing.

Altho the laughter has somewhat gone down as time has gone by and they've seen pics of painted minis, some even grudginly admit they are cool

You are playing a game that was originally invented by the great author H. G. Wells, there is no shame in that.

Your cousin may be under a lot of stress so I wouldnt advise telling him to F Off, just ride it out. Believe me, if he has two girls something else will soon have his attention.

Every man's hobby is another man's folly, it is just that some hobbies are more widespread than others. I mean what could really be more stupid than adults playing a children's game like basketball, football, soccer or baseball, geez grow up already. Or how about chasing a little ball across hill and dale with a stick.

What could be dumber than a motorsport that involves only making left turns and then only on a smooth road under ideal weather conditions? What is the challenge in that????

The FLGS I play at has video games. The worst I get is "why are you playing this instead of an XBOX?" I just shrug them off and enjoy my hobby. nobody can bring me down about it. Unless it's hurting someone, I don't care what people do for fun. Nor do I care what fun is to be had for myself, as long as it's fun.

People just have different values and interests. It's great when people share yours, but in some ways even better when they don't but find a way to appreciate them anyway. It sounds like your cousin is in neither of those groups. Personally, I'd much rather have an $85 plastic tank than spend $85 on, say, tickets to a hockey game or $85 on a nice dinner and drinks. At least I'd still have the tank at the end of the day.

I don't get too much flack because two of my best friends and my brother play this game. At the same time I'm renowned for being good with my money, and was also the first in my family to graduate from post secondary education.

Sometimes I get flack for the money I spend on hobbies. But I have 2 tv/entertainment stands that are set up the same that were 10k each. I have two sets of tournament paintball gear that cost me a total of around 6k, plus now I play airsoft (considerably cheaper by the way) with about 3k in gear. I spend about 2k a year on computer upgrades and gear (pits half because I play games, and half because I'm a software developer and need powerful machines for that too). And I just got a new electric drum kit that cost just under 8k. My total expense for 40k in the ten years I've played it is about 8k, but I also buy a lot of models for my brother because he has kids. Point is, I have numerous hobbies, electronics, music, sports (yes paintball and airsoft art sports, lots of running and jumping and such), and they can all get expensive. I have $300 a month for "extras", which include all my above hobbies, and things like eating at restaurants, going out with friends, movies, and anything that is not part of my living costs. That's after things like mortgage, groceries, other bills, gas for my car, insurance, stuff for my 6 month old daughter, ect. Hell my monthly expenses are about 3k a month. We put 1k away in saving a month, so whatever else I spend my money on is my business and anyone who wants to criticize me better be doing pretty well for themselves.
Whoo, kinda ranted there, my bad

My question is how old are you? If your young it might explain why he feels he can scold you for money spending(as people tend to think younger people never spend their money right). If you are putting money away into savings, and you are still budgeting extra money for whatever hobby you are into, then you are doing good compared to a lot of people. You work to live, not live to work. If you can't find something to enjoy in life, whats the point in working your butt off? Depending on your situation, I'd say as long as you pay your bills, and have money left over (on top of saving no less), then spend it on whatever you want. Heck I know people who spend the equivalent to my extras budget on going to the bar. At least I have something to show and hold for the money I spend on my models.

Having kids might just hit a jealousy thing. I know there was a bit of that with my brother as he has two kids his oldest is five, and I just had my first child 6 months ago. But at the same time, I have paid for about half his army, so that's mostly gone now.

Anyway, for those TL;DR people... It's your money! As long as you are responsible with your money, spend your extra money on whatever makes you happy. That's what life is about, enjoying it! If someone can't get that, their loss. Don't feel guilty for finding something you enjoy and pursuing it.

I got some interesting reactions from people when they've found out about my hobby.

Given that I recently got back into 40k, I asked my girlfriend beforehand, just saying "I'd like to start up the hobby again, this is what it is, and i'll be out 1-2 nights a week playing. Do you mind?" She was a bit suprised, but she always says she'd much prefer me having a friendly game at a community hall than heading out drinking, or just sitting infront of the TV playing xbox. I told her I enjoy painting, and think it's a more constructive hobby than most.

Funnily enough, on my first night at my local club, I bumped into a girl that works in my office. She teaches a weekly Zumba class at the community hall, and I had the pleasure of explaining to this rather fit and active Zumban (new term, just coined it), what the hobby is. She had a couple of quick zibes at me being a geek, but I shrugged them off because I wear that label with pride. I just explained to her that I find it more enjoyable to get out of the house, have a friendly game and a beer with a friend than sit at home watching TV.

As for the $ side of things. Yeah 40k is expensive (more-so for some, right my Aussie brothers?), but hobbies tend to be. If I wasn't spending my disposable income on 40k, it'd sure as hell be spent elsewhere. Drinking, Food, Videogames, or something else. I do spend a large amount of time painting and playing. But I spend just as much time each week playing sport, cooking, hanging out with my friends, and other things that I love to do.

Sounds to me like your cousin is jealous more than anything else. With 2 young children and adult problem, i'm sure he'd love some time out to play a game. But the wife probably wouldn't let him

No, because I'm an adult and I'm generally friends with other adults.

 hotsauceman1 wrote:
Ok, so, some exposition here. Im giddy about the new tau release, so im kinda sharing it. I have some 40k friends on FB so when i got the riptide ordered i posted that i got it. I posted a link and pic to the model to show my 40k friends.
But my cousin saw it. Now my cousin is married, struggling(not really, he still has plenty of money,just not for the things he) with two young girls. He saw it, clicked the link and saw the price. He is now shaming me for spending "85$ on plastic crap" and gloating about it. Im not gloating, i just wanted my friends to see what i got.
I tried to explain to him even more what it was for like how i use it for a game where I use my other models, but know he is just being mean saying things like
"y'know my girls will never be able to afford this" or things like "Why dont you put it in savings(as a note, i put 100$ in savings each month)" and even how i should be focused on school.
Its starting a grind me, i dont like being shamed for my hobby.
So i have to wonder. Does anyone else ever get shamed for playing 40k? or feel guilty? Sometimes i do.

Most of the people I know are respectful of me and my personal interests, as I am of them and theirs. This is what makes them friends and family. Anyone else outside of that, I really could care less what they think. It's your hobby. You enjoy it and it's how you choose to spend your time/money. It's yours. Do as you please with it.

As for your cousin, he obviously doesn't understand what it's all about, and that likely will not change. If he can't afford a hobby, that's his issue and he needs to get over the inferiority and find a way to change that. Unfortunately misery loves company, so people like this will try to bring you down to their level. Tell him that it's what you enjoy doing, and leave it at that.

I don't buy the argument that WH is an expensive hobby. When you recalibrate and consider $/entertainment_hour, it's freakin' cheap as chips.

I buy a 10-man squad of IG troopers for the exhorbitant cost of AUD$48. I paint to a standard that is probably above average, and might spend 20 hours on that squad. $2.40/hour and I haven't begun to factor in the time I'll spend playing with them.

I know I can drink WAAAY more than $2.40 worth of grog an hour!

I'd tell the cuz to mind his own fething business.

I used to care about this sort of thing. Now I realize that the same morons who used to laugh at this hobby are the same morons who now pack my bags at the local supermarket.

 Brother SRM wrote:
No, because I'm an adult and I'm generally friends with other adults.

This.

Closest I've got is a friend trying to get more information about it from me because he didn't play (because it was too expensive for them, duh) and a co-worker brought a Baneblade to paint into his work and he seemed to want to ask her out.

Other than that it's pretty much the same as any other hobby. Either no one cares and doesn't bring it up, or they do for a little bit and there's the usual "oh that's cool" or quick question. The thing to remember is if they're not interested, don't keep going on about it; just like anything else. If they're going to badger you about it, they're likely being petty about something else.

I have no shame on my hobby, and have no problems with people knowing it. However, I do have a problem if people I know are going to take the piss with what I do with my time and money. These people would be called bullies and donkey caves. They make life hard at the best of times and I am not giving them and excuse to go picking on me if I post 40k related stuff to facebook.

Who cares what other people think of you? I love my hobby, and everyone that I know is supportive of it, or doesn't run their suck about my hobbies.

I always tell people if they really care about how I spend then they should match a % of my money that goes into savings and then I will allow you an opinion on my money. They always get a funny awkward look on their faces like they are trying to figure out what to say then the subject always changes. I would really let people have opinions if they'd contribute but for some reason they never do. I do not give my dad this option as he would take me up on it.


Edit -- oh the other good one I use is --- " Yeah you're right no one should be allowed to spend anything on hobbies or entertainment only on necessities. We should form some type of government board to make a list of approved expenditures." That one really shuts them up.

Actually, the GW company section is great about that specific part:
http://investor.games-workshop.com

GW is a hobby. It is not a time killing activity. After you saved your playstation game, you return to the real world, and you have nothing.
After you painted a mini, you used a complete skillset to finish it : precision, modeling, paybe even a bit of sculpting, some artistic sense on the colours. And you have something you did with your own hands.

Of course we are all shamed at some point by people that do not understand the hobby. After all, I can be seen as a 35yo playing with plastic soldiers on the weekend. But hey, it's my money, I paid for it, and if I want to buy and paint plastic soldiers, I think no one will arrest me for it.

Shamed for buying 40K?

@ OP. Do you annoy annoy people screaming about 40K in public? I doubt it. Does your cousin annoy people with his screaming kids in public? Most probably.

I live on a street with five pubs. I see people spending their weekends standing on a pub car park on a housing estate. Personally I find that lame.

Bring on 40K.

Get his daughters really interested in warhammer until they want him to buy some for them. Watch and laugh as he weeps over his shrinking wallet.

I could think it's shameful that people spend $80 on a shirt, or $100 on shoes, or $200 on a purse, ect. But I don't tell people how to spend their money, so they shouldn't tell me how to spend mine. Same goes for you. Buy what you like dude!

I enjoy my hobbies, my wife is supportive of them and that is really the only other person who is allowed to have an opinion.

That said, I am responsible with my purchasing and don't spend more than I can afford. I do think it is silly when someone goes into debt for their hobby, or gives up necessities to pay for it, no matter what that hobby is.

My coworkers' and relatives' hobbies include golf, paintball and dune buggy racing. I assume all of those are expensive hobbies as well.

Jealousy is a terrible thing.

(The idea of saving money in the current economic climate is pretty silly anyway. Every time you put money in a bank you're just spending it slowly, and in the most boring possible way).

Sometimes I feel embarassed for the things that I'm into like Star Wars, Video and computer games, war gaming, and red heads... but then I just gotta remember:

Its yo' thang... do whatchoo wanna do!

I wouldn't worry about him to much, just shrug it of and smile. It honestly sounds like he resents the fact that he doesn't have the freedom to spend money no matter how much on what he wants. I know it was a big adjustment for me after I got married and had kids. I was used to dropping 8 or 9 hundred dollars on whatever I wanted every pay day. Looking back I wish I had picked up wargaming back then but you can't change the past. After I got married though it was a whole different ballgame.

Do you have other fiscal responsibilities that you are neglecting in order to participate in the hobby? Food? Rent? Child? Spouse? etc...

No?

Well tell your cousin to bugger off. You make your money and you have full rights to do with it as you choose. I know plenty of people in this area that have families, children, etc that participate in the hobby AND are paying off all bills, loans, etc.

Dropping money on this is no different then dropping it on cable, internet, sports, gym memberships, movies, music, games, going out to eat, etc

Heh, I think of how much money i spend on warhammer and then factor in how much money i would be spending if i drank or if i had kids. Thats when i realized the fun and value of playing warhammer is much better than pissing away cash on temporary liquid liver destruction or polluting the gene pool with my genetic material. So if anything, i win!

Interestingly enough, warhammer will not often lead to children, whereas drinking will, which will further compromise my cash supply =P

quite frankly, this hobby is actually a lot cheaper than people think it is.

Go talk to the guy that is always tuning his car/pimping it out. Pretty sure he spends a LOT more than we do lol. And he can lose it all in a freak accident, our loss is mainly to us moving meaning our stuff is in boxes and being handled by someone thats not us.

Its only expensive because the model by model price is insane. But in all honesty, how many players can say they have several thousand dollars in this hobby? Even i cant say that and i know i got quite a bit in it (atleast 2k in value, i didnt actually spend that much thanks to ebay lol) but any car hobbiest spends that much for a SINGLE part.

So what if his girls can never afford this (or him for that matter). Family eats up a lot of money, but get this, THEYRE WAY MORE IMPORTANT! if i had to choose between a life of 40k and a life married with kids, i wouldnt be playing 40k unless i was insanely rich lol.
Just ignore his immature bashings. Its your money not his, dont let him tell you how to use it.

I used to get hassled about this until I had enough and decided to take a stand. I found it funny how people would say that i'm wasting money on this when they happily go out and spend more than I do a week on alcohol, which might as well be flushing money down the toilet. At least with this hoppy when you have enough of it you can get quite a high percentage of what you spent on it back.

Another factor is that I am a gamer at heart. When I used to go and stay with my family (who live close to me) I'd bring my laptop because they like to watch TV in the evenings, and I find TV boring. They would say its antisociable and it was a little i suppose. I started 40k about a year ago again after a very long break and they now think i'm wasting time and money on it. They think i should get a TV of my own. I just ask why... I don't want to waste my spare time getting drunk and sitting in front of a box telling me what I need to think and wear and behave etc.

I think i'm losing my point but don't be disheartened by people putting you off. The way I like to see it is that people are afraid of things they don't understand and therefore try to undermine it so that they feel superior to it and the people that do it. I don't let it bother me now, I just pity their ignorance.