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Made in gb
Ridin' on a Snotling Pump Wagon






How do?

So my chubby little God Daughter is growing up fast, and is nearly two years old.

And as a responsible God Father, I find my mind turning to ways of ensuring she grows up taking absolutely no gak she doesn't have to, and will be safe out there in the big wide world.

And a part of that is aiming to give her the physical confidence to be able to defend herself if anyone tries to rough her up or worse- as well as ensuring she has as happy a childhood as possible, and doing my best to keep her educational options open.

Second ones here are a bit of a doddle. If she shows aptitude for the academic, I'll be happy to pay for a private tutor that she might ace the 11+, and get a Grammar School education. If she's not academically inclined, there's other ways to encourage and support her.

Childhood bit? Just generally be there. Show her things, help her find her own level. And yes, a good chunk of that will be kickarse birthday parties, with but a single rule. Whole class is invited. Or no-one is. I want her to be a cool kid for the easy ride, but I also want her to be a properly cool kid - one relatively free of being in a specific social group, and knows from an early age that exclusion sucks.

The first bit though? I want to see if she takes to martial arts. Give her a bit of physical and emotional discipline in her life, so she can remain firmly in control in the majority of situations.

But which one? We live in a wealthy town, so there should be a good selection of classes she can attend. Any thoughts from anyone?

   
Made in us
Posts with Authority





 Mad Doc Grotsnik wrote:
How do?

So my chubby little God Daughter is growing up fast, and is nearly two years old.

And as a responsible God Father, I find my mind turning to ways of ensuring she grows up taking absolutely no gak she doesn't have to, and will be safe out there in the big wide world.


My little niece is drawing close to the same age, and she's chubby and adorable. And I think being called "Unk" is awesome. LOL, she ate like five of those cheddar biscuits at Red Lobster.

 Mad Doc Grotsnik wrote:
And a part of that is aiming to give her the physical confidence to be able to defend herself if anyone tries to rough her up or worse- as well as ensuring she has as happy a childhood as possible, and doing my best to keep her educational options open.

Second ones here are a bit of a doddle. If she shows aptitude for the academic, I'll be happy to pay for a private tutor that she might ace the 11+, and get a Grammar School education. If she's not academically inclined, there's other ways to encourage and support her.

Childhood bit? Just generally be there. Show her things, help her find her own level. And yes, a good chunk of that will be kickarse birthday parties, with but a single rule. Whole class is invited. Or no-one is. I want her to be a cool kid for the easy ride, but I also want her to be a properly cool kid - one relatively free of being in a specific social group, and knows from an early age that exclusion sucks.

The first bit though? I want to see if she takes to martial arts. Give her a bit of physical and emotional discipline in her life, so she can remain firmly in control in the majority of situations.

But which one? We live in a wealthy town, so there should be a good selection of classes she can attend. Any thoughts from anyone?


OK, most martial arts classes are a joke. Some guy went and took some course to become a 'certified trainer'- he threw a few hundred bucks at someone, did some rehearsed moves, and they said he was able to train people to fight. If even that. We have a guy not far from me that claims to be a Muay Thai instructor, and his wife divorced him and straight up said he learned 'from the internet'.

What you want to look for when choosing a martial arts instructor:

-Someone who is not going to instill a false sense of confidence. Unarmed fighting will always be the worst fighting, because only when it's one-on-one is it ever somewhat favorable- and even then, if the person is bigger than you, I don't care how hard you kick and punch... you're going to the hospital. You need an instructor that's going to tell her how dangerous it is.

-Find someone who isn't teaching her to fight in a tournament or demonstration. When someone is trying to hurt you, there are no rules. You want to fight dirty- thumb to the eye sockets, biting ears, kicking genitals, etc.- all legit when trying to protect yourself.

-If they put these kids in little gis or gym clothes, you don't want it. You don't fight people when you're wearing your karate pajamas. You fight them in your shoes, jeans, and shirt. Find someone who does this.

In truth, you want to find someone like a MCMAP instructor, authentic Muay Thay street fighting teacher, or a Krav Maga instructor. Someone who's going to throw her around and beat the crap out of her, so she'll learn how to deal with that when it happens. These fighting styles are pretty damned effective- MCMAP being the most likely one to find, considering that there's a ton of jarhead veterans floating around out there in the civilian world with nothing better to do in their downtime. Plus, speaking as a former Marine myself- we generally love helping kids, hate bullies, and like sharing what we know. MCMAP also teaches you not to be stupid- if someone is trying to hurt you, grab a rock and smash their head in if you can get your hands on it. Stick your thumbs in their eyes, kick 'em in the junk, and don't hesitate to break something of theirs.


Mob Rule is not a rule. 
   
Made in gb
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It's not so much the 'lil' ass-kicker', so much as knowing how to carry oneself with confidence.

Maybe I'm being Wussy, but I'm not sure a teacher that wallops her would work.

   
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 Mad Doc Grotsnik wrote:
It's not so much the 'lil' ass-kicker', so much as knowing how to carry oneself with confidence.

Maybe I'm being Wussy, but I'm not sure a teacher that wallops her would work.


So how's she going to deal with it when someone actually wallops her? That's the point, they use controlled strikes/throws/pins to show them what to expect and counter it.

Otherwise, you may as well have her out shadow-boxing or slapping an inflatable Hello Kitty.

And 'confidence' will start with making sure she's healthy and taking care of herself. As godfather, and Unk- we have a duty to make sure these kids don't get huge and become the target of ridicule, especially if it's preventable.

Mob Rule is not a rule. 
   
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5th God of Chaos! (Yea'rly!)




The Great State of Texas

Get her into sports. Thats much better for self confidence.

Most girls (most people) don't like martial arts and they won't do it. Most people however will find a sport they like.

Women need sport because it helps (rightfully) build self confidence, self esteem and good image. There is a multibillion industry out there who's main marketing point to women is that they look bad or unworthy. Thats what you need to counterbalance.

For self defense teach them a couple of very basic moves-primarily in grappling range. Most importantly teach them how to be aware of their surroundings and the people about them. Thats the big key.

Now if you're in a civilized country you teach them how to use pepper spray and a 9mm Beretta and a rifle but hey not everyone is blessed to be a Texan.

-"Wait a minute.....who is that Frazz is talking to in the gallery? Hmmm something is going on here.....Oh.... it seems there is some dispute over video taping of some sort......Frazz is really upset now..........wait a minute......whats he go there.......is it? Can it be?....Frazz has just unleashed his hidden weiner dog from his mini bag, while quoting shakespeares "Let slip the dogs the war!!" GG
-"Don't mind Frazzled. He's just Dakka's crazy old dude locked in the attic. He's harmless. Mostly."
-TBone the Magnificent 1999-2014, Long Live the King!
 
   
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 Frazzled wrote:
Get her into sports. Thats much better for self confidence.


Concurred. Sports are great. And yes, even you can go get a couple of gloves when she gets old enough and teach her how to throw a softball. And this is also something that will help her get a college education, if she's good enough.

 Frazzled wrote:
Now if you're in a civilized country you teach them how to use pepper spray and a 9mm Beretta and a rifle but hey not everyone is blessed to be a Texan.


You know, when my sister was at the University, she carried a push knife. That might be an alternative.

FYI, OP- do not invest in civilian 'stun guns'. They don't do anything, they just kind of hurt a little. We used to zap each other with them for laughs.

Mob Rule is not a rule. 
   
Made in us
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Tornado Alley

I think what you are proposing is awesome. Confidence is something learned, not given.
Adeptus Doritos has it right though, the flip side to it is, all the classes in the world and self confidence doesn't matter if the worst possible thing happens, and she is put in a position to execute learned techniques. Once someone takes a hit, when not prepared, it becomes a temporary mental game, and while that happens, the attacker is going to press the advantage.

There are multiple fighting styles. I recommend something to allow up close fighting. Ninjitsu is a good one. Any form of grappling and weight manipulation. Anything focusing on striking is going to be less effective for a woman who may not be agile, quick, or strong enough to knock out or remove a threat.

At two years old, I would seriously start with minor exercise though honestly. Get her outside, running around the park, and try to convince the parents that what she puts in her body matters. I am going to say something very callous here, but not to be insulting. A large woman, who is not agile, strong, or able to handle the physical exertion of fighting back will not truly have any confidence. That is just my two cents, take it or leave it.



10k CSM
1.5k Thousand Sons
2k Death Guard
3k Tau
3k Daemons(Tzeentch and Nurgle)
 
   
Made in us
5th God of Chaos! (Yea'rly!)




The Great State of Texas

 redleger wrote:
I think what you are proposing is awesome. Confidence is something learned, not given.
Adeptus Doritos has it right though, the flip side to it is, all the classes in the world and self confidence doesn't matter if the worst possible thing happens, and she is put in a position to execute learned techniques. Once someone takes a hit, when not prepared, it becomes a temporary mental game, and while that happens, the attacker is going to press the advantage.

There are multiple fighting styles. I recommend something to allow up close fighting. Ninjitsu is a good one. Any form of grappling and weight manipulation. Anything focusing on striking is going to be less effective for a woman who may not be agile, quick, or strong enough to knock out or remove a threat.

At two years old, I would seriously start with minor exercise though honestly. Get her outside, running around the park, and try to convince the parents that what she puts in her body matters. I am going to say something very callous here, but not to be insulting. A large woman, who is not agile, strong, or able to handle the physical exertion of fighting back will not truly have any confidence. That is just my two cents, take it or leave it.




At two years old, practice her exercise regime by not giving in to her fits.
If you really want to enjoy life, when she throw a caterwauling fit-you know the kind where she's writhing around on the floor like a cute little snake- don't walk off laughing and make her chase you down, lay down and throw a fit with her. Its fun and will piss her off such that she really works those muscles, at least until she starts uncontrollable laughing.

Also, caves! Every kid likes a cave trip. Take pack where you can carry her when she gets tired.

-"Wait a minute.....who is that Frazz is talking to in the gallery? Hmmm something is going on here.....Oh.... it seems there is some dispute over video taping of some sort......Frazz is really upset now..........wait a minute......whats he go there.......is it? Can it be?....Frazz has just unleashed his hidden weiner dog from his mini bag, while quoting shakespeares "Let slip the dogs the war!!" GG
-"Don't mind Frazzled. He's just Dakka's crazy old dude locked in the attic. He's harmless. Mostly."
-TBone the Magnificent 1999-2014, Long Live the King!
 
   
Made in us
Imperial Guard Landspeeder Pilot




On moon miranda.

 Mad Doc Grotsnik wrote:
How do?

So my chubby little God Daughter is growing up fast, and is nearly two years old.

And as a responsible God Father, I find my mind turning to ways of ensuring she grows up taking absolutely no gak she doesn't have to, and will be safe out there in the big wide world.

And a part of that is aiming to give her the physical confidence to be able to defend herself if anyone tries to rough her up or worse- as well as ensuring she has as happy a childhood as possible, and doing my best to keep her educational options open.

Second ones here are a bit of a doddle. If she shows aptitude for the academic, I'll be happy to pay for a private tutor that she might ace the 11+, and get a Grammar School education. If she's not academically inclined, there's other ways to encourage and support her.

Childhood bit? Just generally be there. Show her things, help her find her own level. And yes, a good chunk of that will be kickarse birthday parties, with but a single rule. Whole class is invited. Or no-one is. I want her to be a cool kid for the easy ride, but I also want her to be a properly cool kid - one relatively free of being in a specific social group, and knows from an early age that exclusion sucks.

The first bit though? I want to see if she takes to martial arts. Give her a bit of physical and emotional discipline in her life, so she can remain firmly in control in the majority of situations.

But which one? We live in a wealthy town, so there should be a good selection of classes she can attend. Any thoughts from anyone?
so...just out of curiosity, have you ever looked at something like HEMA? Longsword, Sabre, Dussack, Rapier, ringen am schwert (wrestling and grappling with the sword), Messer, etc?

Might not be as child friendly or easy to find as something like Karate usually is, but may be an interesting option for a teen.

IRON WITHIN, IRON WITHOUT.

New Heavy Gear Log! Also...Grey Knights!
The correct pronunciation is Imperial Guard and Stormtroopers, "Astra Militarum" and "Tempestus Scions" are something you'll find at Hogwarts.  
   
Made in nl
Pragmatic Primus Commanding Cult Forces






 Vaktathi wrote:
 Mad Doc Grotsnik wrote:
How do?

So my chubby little God Daughter is growing up fast, and is nearly two years old.

And as a responsible God Father, I find my mind turning to ways of ensuring she grows up taking absolutely no gak she doesn't have to, and will be safe out there in the big wide world.

And a part of that is aiming to give her the physical confidence to be able to defend herself if anyone tries to rough her up or worse- as well as ensuring she has as happy a childhood as possible, and doing my best to keep her educational options open.

Second ones here are a bit of a doddle. If she shows aptitude for the academic, I'll be happy to pay for a private tutor that she might ace the 11+, and get a Grammar School education. If she's not academically inclined, there's other ways to encourage and support her.

Childhood bit? Just generally be there. Show her things, help her find her own level. And yes, a good chunk of that will be kickarse birthday parties, with but a single rule. Whole class is invited. Or no-one is. I want her to be a cool kid for the easy ride, but I also want her to be a properly cool kid - one relatively free of being in a specific social group, and knows from an early age that exclusion sucks.

The first bit though? I want to see if she takes to martial arts. Give her a bit of physical and emotional discipline in her life, so she can remain firmly in control in the majority of situations.

But which one? We live in a wealthy town, so there should be a good selection of classes she can attend. Any thoughts from anyone?
so...just out of curiosity, have you ever looked at something like HEMA? Longsword, Sabre, Dussack, Rapier, ringen am schwert (wrestling and grappling with the sword), Messer, etc?

Might not be as child friendly or easy to find as something like Karate usually is, but may be an interesting option for a teen.

Yeah, there is plenty of young teens in my group (they run special less demanding courses for teens under 14). It is fun and more varied and unique than the Asian martial arts that everyone and their mother are doing nowadays. It is definitely not for little kids though.
As she is only 2 years old, it may be a bit early to start thinking about martial arts... Just make sure she gets to play outside a lot.

Alternatively, you could throw down a sword at her feet and tell her "I shall not give you anything. You shall only have what you can provide with this sword". That is how the Vikings used to raise their kids, and it seems to have worked out pretty well for them.

This message was edited 1 time. Last update was at 2017/04/14 16:57:12


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Made in gb
Ridin' on a Snotling Pump Wagon






All these terms and acronyms! I know none of them

I'm not looking to make her invulnerable nor invincible. Just to not look or seem like a victim waiting to happen.

I know that's a horrible description of another human being, but I have seen it.

Sports aren't my bag, but it's my genuinely solemn duty to support her in whatever she does - unless it's drugs. Stupidity? I can teach her smart stupidity. How to go in eyes open and then attempt to defy the odds. That's my scientific speciality!

I'm here to not molllycoddle her, but show her a different set of ropes from her parents. Give her a wide Life Palette to mix her own colour from.

Confidence is the key - even when your quietly pooping yourself. Now, I've got kind of an ace in the hole there. By dint of genetics, I'm 6'2" and built like a brick gak. If those who might pose a problem knew what my friends know, that I'm actually about as soft as mashed potato, my life could be made difficult. But they don't, and they don't try.

I want to pass this on to her, even though seeing as her parents are well diddy, she'll likely follow suit. Even if it's just the self confidence to tell someone in no uncertain terms to, erm....go know their own self in a very Biblical sense I'll be happy. Throw a block here and there, then perhaps a tactical forehead deployment, all the better.

I just don't want her to undeservedly fear someone, whilst knowing one can all too easily bite off more than they can chew.

It's a fine line!

   
Made in ca
Zealous Sin-Eater




Montreal

 Mad Doc Grotsnik wrote:
How do?

So my chubby little God Daughter is growing up fast, and is nearly two years old.

And as a responsible God Father, I find my mind turning to ways of ensuring she grows up taking absolutely no gak she doesn't have to, and will be safe out there in the big wide world.

And a part of that is aiming to give her the physical confidence to be able to defend herself if anyone tries to rough her up or worse- as well as ensuring she has as happy a childhood as possible, and doing my best to keep her educational options open.

Second ones here are a bit of a doddle. If she shows aptitude for the academic, I'll be happy to pay for a private tutor that she might ace the 11+, and get a Grammar School education. If she's not academically inclined, there's other ways to encourage and support her.

Childhood bit? Just generally be there. Show her things, help her find her own level. And yes, a good chunk of that will be kickarse birthday parties, with but a single rule. Whole class is invited. Or no-one is. I want her to be a cool kid for the easy ride, but I also want her to be a properly cool kid - one relatively free of being in a specific social group, and knows from an early age that exclusion sucks.

The first bit though? I want to see if she takes to martial arts. Give her a bit of physical and emotional discipline in her life, so she can remain firmly in control in the majority of situations.

But which one? We live in a wealthy town, so there should be a good selection of classes she can attend. Any thoughts from anyone?


I would stake out the places first. Anyone can recommend their favourite martial art/training regimen, but the end result will entirely depend on the teachers and the crowd.

I took Kenpo Karate in a very small town. The teachers were absolutely great and carried the whole thing by themselves. We were completely lacking in equipment, and there was way too much of a gap between the student's age, meaning that I spent most of my time between 12-18 sparing against either kids or elderly or girls (no disrespect, girls can get really good, it's just rarer and there just weren't any at that tiny dojo). There were some belts where I didn't lose a single sparing match, not counting those against the teachers, and I wasn't at all a good fighter. My few attempts at comp showed me that. Overall I'd recommend Kenpo Karate, but with the caveat that it's one of the more commercialised discipline, so there's going to be more fakers.

The thing about physical fitness or self-defense, and as a response to all the other posters naysaying the benefits of modern martial arts, everything is in the dedication and time given to the discipline. If you send your girl only once a week to an hour session, the benefits to her health/self-defense will be entirely negligeable. That is the general degree of dedication shown by most people that practice nowadays. The difference is drastic when you compare to people that attend 3 classes a week. Kids become very good very quickly. That doesn't mean that they'll kick asses left and right. All of my teachers were adamant, and I think this makes or breaks a good teacher : the first reaction to being attacked should always be to seek escape. Kenpo Karate self-defense techniques are few, adaptable and always assume that you are being attacked at close range.

Find good teachers, select a "hard" discipline like wushu, karate or judo (something that has tiny elements of oriental spiritual b.s., but spends a lot more time on training) and encourage your kid to practice a lot.

Also, and I mean this in a general sense, some kids shouldn't learn any martial art/combat techniques until they are older (even perhaps a lot older). I'd say I'd trust a parent to know if their kid is the impulsive kind, but we all know how rosy those glasses lenses can be. Kids that have ADHD, authority-related disorders or any other trouble won't necessarily get better from the discipline given. They'll remember the punches and kicks and locks, tho.

[...] for conflict is the great teacher, and pain, the perfect educator.  
   
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 Kovnik Obama wrote:
Also, and I mean this in a general sense, some kids shouldn't learn any martial art/combat techniques until they are older (even perhaps a lot older). I'd say I'd trust a parent to know if their kid is the impulsive kind, but we all know how rosy those glasses lenses can be. Kids that have ADHD, authority-related disorders or any other trouble won't necessarily get better from the discipline given. They'll remember the punches and kicks and locks, tho.


Not to mention many "serious" MA clubs, self-defence academies and what-have-you might not even take students below 16 or 18 - they prefer not having to explain why they taught little Timmy how to severely beat his schoolmates.

As for the rest, well... Just up and deciding your neice should learn some self-defence won't really work if she's not interested, but see if the tyke would like some kiddie judo at the appropriate age. It's not that serious but if it takes she'll continue when older and judo is surprisingly useful for many things. The stereotypical grab-your-arm or grab-your-collar guy who wants you to follow him just set himself up for a nice throw or trip, giving you plenty time to start running. And knowing how to fall without hurting yourself (getting back to your feet in the same motion for some of the ukemi) is useful everywhere. It's often the difference between serious injury and a few bruises.
   
 
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