Switch Theme:

How do you deal with a sore winner?  [RSS] Share on facebook Share on Twitter Submit to Reddit
»
Author Message
Advert


Forum adverts like this one are shown to any user who is not logged in. Join us by filling out a tiny 3 field form and you will get your own, free, dakka user account which gives a good range of benefits to you:
  • No adverts like this in the forums anymore.
  • Times and dates in your local timezone.
  • Full tracking of what you have read so you can skip to your first unread post, easily see what has changed since you last logged in, and easily see what is new at a glance.
  • Email notifications for threads you want to watch closely.
  • Being a part of the oldest wargaming community on the net.
If you are already a member then feel free to login now.




Made in ca
Regular Dakkanaut




Yeah, the question is simple? See I have a friend who has always been interested in Warhammer, so when I got the Dark Imperium set for me and my girlfriend I decided to play a bunch of games with him (I've had a few skirmishes with him once upon a time ago, but they were just piece meal armies on both sides from my collection) So we play a game an it's pretty close, See I play the Death Guard now, but he wanted to play them so I let him, and I was playing the marines side. It was VERY close, but in the end he won. I shook his hand because it was a fun game, we talked and then in the most smug voice he's ever used on me he said "So, looks like you play Warhammer, yet I've won two times and you've only won once against me."
Now, I might just be a sore loser, but I wasn't so sore until he got smug and condescending about it..
He did it last night when I was play testing my new Hell Brute, I took out a few guys for the Death guard swapped it in to balance it out at a nice 845 points on both sides (Still using space marines)
And well, of course he won, that Hell Brute was freaking scary and I was happy it worked as well as it did (Plasma Cannon and Power Scourge if you were curious) and again in the same tone he got close to me and said "Three for me, one for you."
Cool guy and all and it didn't affect me as much as the other time.
But how do I deal with someone who gets that smug when they win in matches that are just for fun. Thats the kicker by the way, these matches are just for fun, not playing for keeps (When he get's orks that's a whole other topic but whatever)
So yeah, how do I deal with this situation?
Or am I the one who's just being a whiny baby?
I want your guys opinion
   
Made in us
Longtime Dakkanaut





You know him better than I do (obviously) but is he really being that way or is it an attempt to show he is into the game?
   
Made in ca
Regular Dakkanaut




 thekingofkings wrote:
You know him better than I do (obviously) but is he really being that way or is it an attempt to show he is into the game?

Believe me, it wasn't a friendly "Oh haha! I'm actually really good at this!"
It was more in the vein of an ultra competitive "I'm better than you! And have physical evidence to support it."
I told him I won't really count it until he get's his own army.
   
Made in ca
Secretive Dark Angels Veteran



Canada

If you do not enjoy playing Warhammer with him then don't play Warhammer with him but retain your friendship by doing other things.

All you have to do is fire three rounds a minute, and stand 
   
Made in us
Longtime Dakkanaut




You could always say "Yeah Yeah, I lost to my own army," in the most joking way possible. As you already said your learning about your models even losing so that's good too. And maybe he doesn't realize how he is saying it.

From personal experience I used to have a group I played with thag 4 of the guys were all about fun. The 5th guy when he started playing was a rule lawyer / all about winning guy. At first it was a put off, no one really wanted to play him. But I took a step back and started thinking "maybe it's not that he is doing this to be a jerk or because he HAS to win, maybe it's because he is coming into this 3 months after the rest of us and is trying to validate himself as a player, and as such believes he has to win to do so." After thinking that way for a bit I challenged him to a game, and I told him I want him to bring his toughest list he could do against me (at that time he was Tyrnaid) and I rolled randomly from our armies we had to choose from in front of him and got space wolves. I made the most anti bug army I could and even though I lost the game it was very enjoyable for both of us, and me vs him became a thing of "try to one up him" in our games.

My long winded point is everyone plays for a different reason and sometimes you may think that your trying to just play friendly your friend may think "the only way he will want to play me is if I show him I am good at this game", maybe even subconsciously.

Or he could just be a grot. one can never tell. Lol
   
Made in us
Ancient Venerable Dark Angels Dreadnought





simple.....stop losing
   
Made in au
Regular Dakkanaut






Take a tournament list and give him a dog house list and just smash him into the floor. Say "Wow I've never seen anyone lose that badly... ever"
   
Made in us
Wondering Why the Emperor Left




Oklahoma City

I lift weights. I remember bringing a co worker with me one time. He doesn't lift but managed to squat 185 a few times. I told him that was good weight, in order to be encouraging. It went to his head and he always brought it up like he was The Hulk or something. It really chapped my ass because of how easily some peoples egos get inflated. Like they're just waiting for ANYTHING to brag about

I feel ya man. I would say destroy him but since I lose all the time I can't give that as advice

This message was edited 1 time. Last update was at 2017/08/18 04:46:06


 
   
Made in us
Blood-Drenched Death Company Marine




Little Rock, Arkansas

Take him to a larger GT or two. A few losses to people he's never met should pull the ego down a little. Bonus points if you outrank him.

20000+ points
Tournament reports:
1234567 
   
Made in gb
Fresh-Faced New User




Well, everyone is different when it comes to these things. The people i play with make a point of rubbing in any victory as far as they can. Drinking deep in the tears of defeat etc. The usual response would be to call em a ****, then laugh and move on.

But then again some people take it badly. It's hard to say with out knowing you and your friend.

Either way i think its important to let people enjoy their victories, if you enjoy the banter then banter back, if not just smile and say nothing i'm sure they'll get the message eventually.

I doubt very much that he means to offend you. ( although without knowing him i could be wrong )

This message was edited 1 time. Last update was at 2017/08/18 08:35:43


 
   
Made in gb
Combat Jumping Rasyat




East of England

To be honest, it sounds like he's yanking your chain to me. If he thinks your taking it too seriously, or finds getting a rise out of people amusing, it could be a joke to him.

In either case, I'd strongly advise that you use the experience to become less sensitive to people's opinions. Think of it as a training exercise. As he pulls that chain, be ready, and reflect that your friend thinks this is a good thing, for whatever reason! When someone's got the wrong end of the stick, then we should feel sorry for them, not confirm their interpretation by responding as if they're correct.

If it's a joke, or if it's not, the best approach, if you want to carry on gaming with your friend, is a deflationary one.
   
Made in gb
Courageous Space Marine Captain






Glasgow, Scotland

Steps to dealing with a sore winner

- Step back from the table
- Shake his hand and accept grace in defeat
- Allow his moment of glory
- Freely admit your loss without blaming it on excuses such as bad roles or luck
- Find his weakness (pride in looks, lack of sexual escapades, small man syndrome, etc)
- Exploit weakness with ruthless and precision. Target his lack of dating history, point out that his fly is undone, his poor paintjob. Whatever is necessary.
- Subtley suggest you weren't playing to win
- Plant the seed of doubt over the legitimacy of his win.
- Be casual and natural and innocent as you quietly pack away your things, as if you don't know what's happening and you are not bother whatsoever by the defeat.
- Wait for him to start to rub it in and gloat.
- Hear the Mortal Kombat voice scream "FINISH HIMMMM" in your head
- Destroy him completely. The words of power are "Its just a game dude."
- Drop Mic
- "OVERLYGRUMPYTAU WINS! FATALITY!"
- Walk away in slow motion as explosions go off behind you. Aviator sunglasses recommended. Don't look at the explosions.
- Research net lists online.
- Sell a kidney
- Buy the new meta netlist that's guarenteed win
- Paint a professional to paint it to above TT standard.
- Play him a rematch.
- Crush him utterly.
- Grace in victory
- Watch his world and beliefs crumble.
- Celebrate with champagne and bagels.



Congratulations, you have overcome the Sore Winner!

I'm celebrating 8 years on Dakka Dakka!
I started an Instagram! Follow me at Deadshot Miniatures!
DR:90+S++G+++M+B+IPw40k08#-D+++A+++/cwd363R+++T(Ot)DM+
Check out my Deathwatch story, Aftermath in the fiction section!

Credit to Castiel for banner. Thanks Cas!
 
   
Made in gb
Sneaky Sniper Drone





SE England

 Deadshot wrote:
Steps to dealing with a sore winner

- Step back from the table
- Shake his hand and accept grace in defeat
- Allow his moment of glory
- Freely admit your loss without blaming it on excuses such as bad roles or luck
- Find his weakness (pride in looks, lack of sexual escapades, small man syndrome, etc)
- Exploit weakness with ruthless and precision. Target his lack of dating history, point out that his fly is undone, his poor paintjob. Whatever is necessary.
- Subtley suggest you weren't playing to win
- Plant the seed of doubt over the legitimacy of his win.
- Be casual and natural and innocent as you quietly pack away your things, as if you don't know what's happening and you are not bother whatsoever by the defeat.
- Wait for him to start to rub it in and gloat.
- Hear the Mortal Kombat voice scream "FINISH HIMMMM" in your head
- Destroy him completely. The words of power are "Its just a game dude."
- Drop Mic
- "OVERLYGRUMPYTAU WINS! FATALITY!"
- Walk away in slow motion as explosions go off behind you. Aviator sunglasses recommended. Don't look at the explosions.
- Research net lists online.
- Sell a kidney
- Buy the new meta netlist that's guarenteed win
- Paint a professional to paint it to above TT standard.
- Play him a rematch.
- Crush him utterly.
- Grace in victory
- Watch his world and beliefs crumble.
- Celebrate with champagne and bagels.



Congratulations, you have overcome the Sore Winner!


That reminds me of the D.E.N.N.I.S system from Always Sunny!

For the greater good... 
   
Made in br
Fireknife Shas'el




Lisbon, Portugal

So, that's how WAACs are created...

AI & BFG: / BMG: Mr. Freeze, Deathstroke / Battletech: SR, OWA / HGB: Caprice / Malifaux: Arcanists, Guild, Outcasts / MCP: Mutants / SAGA: Ordensstaat / SW Legion & X-Wing: CIS / WWX: Union

 Unit1126PLL wrote:
"FW is unbalanced and going to ruin tournaments."
"Name one where it did that."
"IT JUST DOES OKAY!"

 Shadenuat wrote:
Voted Astra Militarum for a chance for them to get nerfed instead of my own army.
 
   
Made in gb
Courageous Space Marine Captain






Glasgow, Scotland

 Vector Strike wrote:
So, that's how WAACs are created...



You either die a casul, or live long enough to see yourself become TFG.

I'm celebrating 8 years on Dakka Dakka!
I started an Instagram! Follow me at Deadshot Miniatures!
DR:90+S++G+++M+B+IPw40k08#-D+++A+++/cwd363R+++T(Ot)DM+
Check out my Deathwatch story, Aftermath in the fiction section!

Credit to Castiel for banner. Thanks Cas!
 
   
Made in gb
Stern Iron Priest with Thrall Bodyguard



UK

Crush him mercilessly grind his face into the dirt and enjoy the lamentations of his women folk.
   
Made in gb
Been Around the Block





Never take anything too seriously. Always take the piss. Out of everything. Including yourself.

(Transatlantic translation- Take the piss = lighthearted banter. Not BANTS!)
   
Made in dk
Servoarm Flailing Magos






Metalica

 Cuz05 wrote:
Never take anything too seriously. Always take the piss. Out of everything. Including yourself.

(Transatlantic translation- Take the piss = lighthearted banter. Not BANTS!)


And then go for a cheeky Nandos. Everyone is like, Cuz you're an absolute ledge.

 
   
Made in ca
Ancient Venerable Black Templar Dreadnought





Canada

Overly smug winner.
Does not have his own army, won using your lists, you were experimenting with new stuff.
Anyone who plays in general knows that some of the "supporting framework" of the wins were not his.
You at least can "console" yourself into knowing that this tally of wins is not truly representative of his greatness.

I taught my girlfriend at the time cribbage and she got near perfect hands on the first game and "double skunked" me.
I was never skunked, ever, till then.
This kinda stuff happens when you play games and when depending largely on lady luck, experience can sometimes mean nothing.

I had a guy that beat me the first couple times but he started noticing they were getting harder to do.
He eventually "retired" "not needing to prove his greatness" when really he knew I was getting better at the game and his number was up.

All these things happen.
They suck on occasion.
You may just need to find friends to play that are not quite so serious about keeping score.

I personally would just take what he has to say and "sharpen my pencil and bit" and be sharper about my strategy and tactics.
A challenge is still a challenge, even if he is not the best of sportsman behavior.

It could be worse, the WAAC mentioned where people feel a need to cheat which is a whole different brand of person.

This message was edited 2 times. Last update was at 2017/08/18 13:50:58


A revolution is an idea which has found its bayonets.
Napoleon Bonaparte 
   
Made in us
Cultist of Nurgle with Open Sores





My view is probably UN-popular, and not trying to be rude, but ....get over it.

If a game of plastic soldiers is enough to get you upset enough to make a post about it, maybe you take it too seriously? It is like the people that flip out over video games. Or people that get into fights after a football game with fans from the other team.

Again, not trying to sound like a jerk, but this is a hobby. If you continue to play with this dude learn to laugh it off and move on. If it bothers you so much, dont play with him. But remember this is a game and does not affect your life.
   
Made in ca
Ancient Venerable Black Templar Dreadnought





Canada

Vaxx wrote:
My view is probably UN-popular, and not trying to be rude, but ....get over it.
If a game of plastic soldiers is enough to get you upset enough to make a post about it, maybe you take it too seriously? It is like the people that flip out over video games. Or people that get into fights after a football game with fans from the other team.
Again, not trying to sound like a jerk, but this is a hobby. If you continue to play with this dude learn to laugh it off and move on. If it bothers you so much, dont play with him. But remember this is a game and does not affect your life.
Funny this statement, is basically saying "Suck it up Princess", but that is putting words into his mouth...

This is a hobby that can represent a fair bit of our leisure time.
We work hard (hopefully) and look forward to our "play" time.
Emotionally, it has a rather high level of importance so even a minor discomfort is not easily ignored due the high expectation / looking forward to getting games in.
It DOES affect a person's life, it just may not be on the highest level of priority in the scheme of things but still not so low to be made light of.
Do not always assume that if someone is concerned about their games of "toy soldiers" that they do not have their life priorities straight.
Dakka is also a place with forums specifically for discussing gaming matters: if you cannot discuss them here, where can you "seriously" discuss them?

Gloating behavior is maddening anywhere it is found.
Would it make it any less irritating if a co-worker points out he got a bigger bonus at work than you?

I would agree with Vaxx in the regard that something needs to be done to address this issue so fun can be had again.
That is really up to the OP to address.
Since it is a friend causing the issue, destroying them on the table-top is all in good fun.
If you cannot abuse your good friends and ridicule them, who can you?

A revolution is an idea which has found its bayonets.
Napoleon Bonaparte 
   
Made in ca
Regular Dakkanaut




 Deadshot wrote:
Steps to dealing with a sore winner

- Step back from the table
- Shake his hand and accept grace in defeat
- Allow his moment of glory
- Freely admit your loss without blaming it on excuses such as bad roles or luck
- Find his weakness (pride in looks, lack of sexual escapades, small man syndrome, etc)
- Exploit weakness with ruthless and precision. Target his lack of dating history, point out that his fly is undone, his poor paintjob. Whatever is necessary.
- Subtley suggest you weren't playing to win
- Plant the seed of doubt over the legitimacy of his win.
- Be casual and natural and innocent as you quietly pack away your things, as if you don't know what's happening and you are not bother whatsoever by the defeat.
- Wait for him to start to rub it in and gloat.
- Hear the Mortal Kombat voice scream "FINISH HIMMMM" in your head
- Destroy him completely. The words of power are "Its just a game dude."
- Drop Mic
- "OVERLYGRUMPYTAU WINS! FATALITY!"
- Walk away in slow motion as explosions go off behind you. Aviator sunglasses recommended. Don't look at the explosions.
- Research net lists online.
- Sell a kidney
- Buy the new meta netlist that's guarenteed win
- Paint a professional to paint it to above TT standard.
- Play him a rematch.
- Crush him utterly.
- Grace in victory
- Watch his world and beliefs crumble.
- Celebrate with champagne and bagels.



Congratulations, you have overcome the Sore Winner!


I read this and ended up thinking "Jesus dude, I want to demoralize him, not kill him" hah
This plan I do quite enjoy though
   
Made in ca
Perfect Shot Ultramarine Predator Pilot






It's hard to talk about the exact situation, given that the only one there was OP. But IMO, the best way to handle a sore winner is to talk with them. Though that may be difficult to do, if you don't want to come across as sensitive/sore loser/moody. The friend may just be a competitive dick that likes to be above people, or he's trying to have some bants and spark up some competition/rivalry.

Anecdotally speaking, I've got a bit of a rivalry with a local Ork player, who made it his mission, after I had won all my 8th edition matches against him up to that point, to make a list that would crush my filthy Guilliman and the Primaris Funky Bunch army.
That particular match, I was running all Primaris, with no Robert, and got handily crushed. And from a mix of inflammatory comments, getting wrecked, and feeling rather under thw weather that day, I was feeling rather sore. But after the game and going for some drinks, unprompted, as I was fine to just let the match go, the player apologized for the comments before the game (Things along the line of "No Robert to carry you?" ect, ect. A bit of friendly bants, that, in the situation of the following game could be perceived as rude).

Moral of the story; you could be sore, he could be sore. It could've been his intention to start some good-natured but competitive... competition. Or he could be a dick. This is less a dilemma about 40k, and more about interpersonal relationships.

Skaven - 4500
OBR - 4250
- 6800
- 4250
- 2750 
   
Made in se
Regular Dakkanaut




Tell him to knock it off, to stop being a piece of garbage and just enjoy playing the game.
No need for anything else.
   
Made in gb
Slaanesh Chosen Marine Riding a Fiend





To OP, Dreadsock! Look it up if need be.

Please note, for those of you who play Chaos Daemons as a faction the term "Daemon" is potentially offensive. Instead, please play codex "Chaos: Mortally Challenged". Thank you. 
   
Made in us
Androgynous Daemon Prince of Slaanesh





Norwalk, Connecticut

It read to me like he was trying to smacktalk into getting another game in; yanking your chain. Lots of people talk smack. Do it back to him; remind him he had to win using your models with a list you built for him. Tell him half the game is decided in the list building, so his victory is 75% due to you (50% the list, and half of the remaining 50% is due to how you played).

Reality is a nice place to visit, but I'd hate to live there.

Manchu wrote:I'm a Catholic. We eat our God.


Due to work, I can usually only ship any sales or trades out on Saturday morning. Please trade/purchase with this in mind.  
   
Made in gb
Assassin with Black Lotus Poison





Bristol

Buy a Tau army, assemble according to the options in the 4th edition Tau codex.

Buy a Necron army, assemble according to options in the 5th edition codex.

Ask him if he wants to play a game of 5th edition 40K using Tau.

This message was edited 1 time. Last update was at 2017/08/18 16:48:45


The Laws of Thermodynamics:
1) You cannot win. 2) You cannot break even. 3) You cannot stop playing the game.

Colonel Flagg wrote:You think you're real smart. But you're not smart; you're dumb. Very dumb. But you've met your match in me.
 
   
Made in us
Clousseau





East Bay, Ca, US

Just start beating him. He can't be that good.

 Galas wrote:
I remember when Marmatag was a nooby, all shiney and full of joy. How playing the unbalanced mess of Warhammer40k in a ultra-competitive meta has changed you

Bharring wrote:
He'll actually *change his mind* in the presence of sufficient/sufficiently defended information. Heretic.
 
   
Made in us
Monster-Slaying Daemonhunter





Turn it around and beat him. Bring out things he's never seen before, so that he realizes the game is way bigger than the box set. Be nice about it, though. You want him to still think he has it in him to be good, but also show him that, to develop into actually being good, he needs to have his own army. You also need to make sure that, when he starts his own army, he doesn't log an endless string of defeats. That gets people to quit.

Guardsmen, hear me! Cadia may lie in ruin, but her proud people do not! For each brother and sister who gave their lives to Him as martyrs, we will reap a vengeance fiftyfold! Cadia may be no more, but will never be forgotten; our foes shall tremble in fear at the name, for their doom shall come from the barrels of Cadian guns, fired by Cadian hands! Forward, for vengeance and retribution, in His name and the names of our fallen comrades! 
   
Made in us
War Walker Pilot with Withering Fire




Dumb question, but is he just that oblivious? Like he might've thought it was funny to tease you about, but not realizing how it's coming across? If he's generally cool, I'm guessing it's an oversight.

I also love the response of, "It won't count until you get your own army."
   
 
Forum Index » 40K General Discussion
Go to: