31953
Post by: nomsheep
Hey I saw this game here and thought I'd make a thread here.
NeroArcana wrote:We all have wishes right? Well this is a fun way to post them and see what others' responses are. However, there's a twist. You wish for something, but the person below you corrupts it! Then they post their wish and whoever posts below them gets to corrupt theirs. For example:
User One: I wish I could go on a picnic.
User Two: Wish granted, but it rains. I wish I had a cat.
User Three: Wish granted, but it has rabies. I wish I had a million pounds.
Etc. etc. Get how it goes? This can get really fun if you really get into it. Think about your corruptions, and make them terrible
I'll start since it's my thread.
I wish firefly hadn't been cancelled.
Nom
54216
Post by: TheRobotLol
But it is AWEFUL
I wish I was immortal.
46059
Post by: rockerbikie
But you are put on lifesupport and you are a cripple.
I wish for a new Powerful Wood Elf Army book.
47547
Post by: CthuluIsSpy
But its written by Matt Ward, so all the Elves are now Spesse Mahrines.
I wish Duke Nukem Forever didn't blow.
31953
Post by: nomsheep
Granted now it sucks
I wish I was a little bit taller, I wish a baller, I wish I had a girl that looked good, I would call her, I wish I had a rabbit in a. Hat with a bat and a "6" "4" Impala.
Internet if anyone gets that.
Nom
46059
Post by: rockerbikie
Granted. The rabbit is dead. The girl has aids and is a shemale. The 64 Impala is rusty and the engine is dead. You are 7 foot tall now.
I wish to be a Red Corsair Khorne Beserker.
17349
Post by: SilverMK2
Granted, but you accidentally annoyed the daemon that granted your wish and are turned into a choas spawn instead. I wish that my armies would assemble and paint themselves.
31953
Post by: nomsheep
Granted but they don't include the arms and paint swastikas on the foreheads of every troop meaning that you can never play them again
I wish I was a fish.
Nom
17349
Post by: SilverMK2
Granted. But since you are not in water you quickly asphyxiate.
I wish to have lots and lots of money.
31953
Post by: nomsheep
Granted you are now a columbian drug lord with loads of money, shame your second in command wants to rise up the ranks...
I wish America was still a part of the colonies [therefore easier to move to]
Nom
46059
Post by: rockerbikie
Wish but the French win the Napoleonic wars and Britain is reduce to the status of Protectorate.
I wish that Red Corsairs get their own codex.
17349
Post by: SilverMK2
Damn, ninja'd.
Granted, but unfortunately it is released just before the new edition, which renders it completely unplayable.
I wish that we could travel to distant planets.
31953
Post by: nomsheep
Granted it sucks
Granted but it takes too long and you die
I wish I was jamacian
Nom
17349
Post by: SilverMK2
Granted. Unfortunately you are alive during the period where slave ownership is still around and you live your life in endless toil.
I wish I could fly.
47547
Post by: CthuluIsSpy
Wish granted, but you fly into a airplane's turbine.
I wish I was a walrus. Koo Koo Kachoo
17349
Post by: SilverMK2
Granted. Unfortunately you are rounded up by animal control and locked in a zoo for the rest of your life where you are bullied by the other animals.
I wish that chocolate was good for you.
31953
Post by: nomsheep
Granted but I'm a hungry Eskimo
I wish I was a jamacain in these times so no slavery.
Nom
46059
Post by: rockerbikie
Wish granted but you are in jail for life.
I wish to be a Daemon Prince of Khorne.
31953
Post by: nomsheep
Granted but wires are crossed and you become a deamon prince of corn
I wish I had some manga
Nom
17349
Post by: SilverMK2
Granted. Unfortunately it is the kind with "tentecles".
I wish I could make people explode with a thought.
46059
Post by: rockerbikie
Wish granted but it is Naruto.
I wish for a real Death Note which my name is not written in.
31953
Post by: nomsheep
Granted but I steal it and write your name in anyway.
I wish I was overlord of earth
Nom
14070
Post by: SagesStone
Granted, you are now a rock.
I wish I could actually think up good wishes for these things...
17349
Post by: SilverMK2
You think up the best wish ever, but then forget it before you can post it.
I wish that GW had more affordable prices
31953
Post by: nomsheep
Denied!!!
I mean granted but you get conscripted and can't actually biy them.
I wish my rat was friendlier
Nom
26674
Post by: Slarg232
Granted, He's now Peter Pedigrew.
I wish I was an Oscar Meyer Weiner.
46059
Post by: rockerbikie
Wish granted but you die Ebola virus after you get it.
I wish that Santa Christ exists.
54216
Post by: TheRobotLol
But you are him and live a life of hard, unrewarding work, where 99.999% of the world does not believe in you and are morbidly obese.
I wish I had an epic x-box 360 game.
31953
Post by: nomsheep
Granted but its so epic that you play it so much that you never leave home and are never heard of again.
I wish I had a personal army at my command.
Nom
46059
Post by: rockerbikie
Wish granted but it is an army of little girls.
I wish for an army of Space Marines.
31953
Post by: nomsheep
granted,
how are your hello kitty marines?
I wish for battlefleet fury's revival
Nom
47547
Post by: CthuluIsSpy
Granted, but its bloody terrible.
I wish I were a Oscar Meyer Hotdog
26674
Post by: Slarg232
CthuluIsSpy wrote:Granted, but its bloody terrible.
I wish I were a Oscar Meyer Hotdog
Granted, but you fall on the floor and get thrown away, never to be consumed; the best death of OM Hotdogs.
I wish I was constantly flanked by beautiful women.
47547
Post by: CthuluIsSpy
Slarg232 wrote:CthuluIsSpy wrote:Granted, but its bloody terrible.
I wish I were a Oscar Meyer Hotdog
Granted, but you fall on the floor and get thrown away, never to be consumed; the best death of OM Hotdogs.
I wish I was constantly flanked by beautiful women.
Granted, by they are all militant feminazis.
I wish I was Charlie Sheen.
31953
Post by: nomsheep
Granted, there isn't really a way to corrupt that cos charlie sheens sucks on so many levels.
I wish my hair would sort myself out.
Nom
26674
Post by: Slarg232
Granted, your hair rips you apart peice by peice and places you in Alphabetical order.
I wish Said Feminazis weren't feminazis....
31953
Post by: nomsheep
Granted but now they need and new cause and they just hate you.
I wish my hamster stopped peeing on me.
Nom
54216
Post by: TheRobotLol
Granted. It now pees on/in your food.
I wish I was always in perfect health.
31953
Post by: nomsheep
granted, but because of your insanely good health you now are sought after by the MoD for 'testing'.....
I wish I could move already :/
Nom
46059
Post by: rockerbikie
Wish granted but you move next to a Carnifex migration trail.
I wish to play a Good Board Game with someone.
49062
Post by: JohnnoM
granted but the person is a TFG and a rules nazi.
I wish games workshop was cheaper.
46055
Post by: Dragonheart
Granted but they would still be too much
I wish that i had over 9,000 ponys on planet unicorn
39694
Post by: Urien_Rakarth
there are only 8,000. I wish this thread would end...
51344
Post by: BlapBlapBlap
But you shall slowly be torn in half by my minions.
I wish I had the money to start a Lizardmen Army, along with the rulebook and army book.
31953
Post by: nomsheep
Granted you get three hundred dollars, that should cover a lord, one troops choice and one different troop along with the books.
Shame they just got squated
I wish Sisters were cheaper.
Nom
51344
Post by: BlapBlapBlap
But they are now a fantasy army
I wish I could eat my feet
31953
Post by: nomsheep
Granted, but no real way to corrupt that since having no feet is generally viewed as a bad thing.
I wish I could get a story published with BL.
Nom
51344
Post by: BlapBlapBlap
Granted, but it shall be several hundred pages thick, hardcover and smacked repeatedly upside your head.
I wish I could bring Edd Gould of Eddsworld back to life
31953
Post by: nomsheep
Granted but he comes back as a douche.
I wish marmite was nice
Nom
51344
Post by: BlapBlapBlap
nomsheep wrote:Granted but he comes back as a douche.
Now that is impossible!
Granted, but it causes cancer.
I wish that I could fit my fist into my mouth.
31953
Post by: nomsheep
Granted but it gets stuck. good luck explaining that to the doctors.
I wish i had a hello kitty army
Nom
51344
Post by: BlapBlapBlap
Granted, but the entire thing is taken by your new brother to a science fair to show what happens when plastic is microwaved.
I wish that the female gender was attracted to me.
31953
Post by: nomsheep
Granted but they give you so much attention that you go insane.
I wish that the 'just friends' category didn't exist.
NOm
51344
Post by: BlapBlapBlap
Granted, but it gets replaced with the "Only Friends" catergory.
I wish I could ride a Carnifex.
31953
Post by: nomsheep
Granted but he eats you after.
I wish i coud hug a bear.
Nom
51344
Post by: BlapBlapBlap
Granted, but the bear is a lie.
I wish I could make a Gatling Gun
49062
Post by: JohnnoM
Granted by its ant sized.
I wish I could pouch a hole in the moon.
49496
Post by: Great White
Granted, but you break every bone in your body.
I wish I had a new laptop.
31953
Post by: nomsheep
Granted but but it gets virused and dies.
I wish i knew why my browser was suddenly spell checking everything.
Nom
38961
Post by: Dr. Temujin
Granted, but now you are left to wonder why your computer is pondering the mysteries of the universe.
I wish gauss weapons were rending.
51344
Post by: BlapBlapBlap
Granted, but now all Necrons are BS 1
31953
Post by: nomsheep
Since you didn't actually make a wish, hungry piranhas eat your groin.
I wish gw actually had a sane and stable release schedule.
Nom
51344
Post by: BlapBlapBlap
Granted, but now all of their releases explode when they come into contact into human beings.
I wish that I could Flash Animate.
47737
Post by: marmaduke
granted but all you can do is hentai
I wish i Gw's prices weren't so outragous
10104
Post by: snurl
Granted. GW management gives up their collective crack habit and re-prices their entire range realistically. Gas and food prices fall as well. Then you wake up.
I wish for better glue.
31953
Post by: nomsheep
Granted but you accidently stick your fingers together permanently.
I wish meat didn't make me ill.
Nom
38961
Post by: Dr. Temujin
Granted. You are now allergic to water.
I wish mecha were real.
31953
Post by: nomsheep
Granted but it goes mad and kills you.
I wish I was immortal.
Nom
19728
Post by: liquidjoshi
Granted, but you're buried alive underground with no limbs.
I wish everyone would stop making wishes.
51344
Post by: BlapBlapBlap
Granted, but people voice hopes instead
I wish that fish could eat off my enemy's face
19728
Post by: liquidjoshi
Granted, he enjoys them eating fish flakes from his cheeks. He emerges completely unharmed, while the fish asphyxiate.
Wish I had a burger.
51344
Post by: BlapBlapBlap
Granted, but the burger is made using your own hand.
I would get the "Ralphwich" clip from the simpsons, but I can't find it.
I wish that magical pixies would shoot me in the face with a laser
51859
Post by: Squidmanlolz
Your face melts like the guy's from Raiders of the Lost Ark.
I wish that my walls were covered in shag carpeting.
51344
Post by: BlapBlapBlap
Granted, but now you live inside the digestive tract of a Sperm Whale.
I wish that I could jump out of a 3rd story window and survive.
19728
Post by: liquidjoshi
Fine. You land inside Squidman's Whale house.
I wish I was Elvis.
51344
Post by: BlapBlapBlap
Granted, but after he died.
I wish that I had psychic powers.
47547
Post by: CthuluIsSpy
Granted, but you are then kidnapped by the WBC who immolate you for witchcraft.
I wish I just got my bloody diploma already and didn't have to do exams.
51344
Post by: BlapBlapBlap
Granted, but your diploma is for Clown College.
I wish that ravenous Daemons would set fire to my pinkie.
51859
Post by: Squidmanlolz
Granted. The fire spreads to your entire body.
I wish I could brew alcohol in my body, like an elephant.
51344
Post by: BlapBlapBlap
Granted. You get busted on producing moonshine and get the chair.
I wish I could play Green Day on guitar.
51859
Post by: Squidmanlolz
Granted. But you can only play their music from American Idiot on.
I wish my TV were a butler robot T1000
51344
Post by: BlapBlapBlap
That's my favourite album.
Anyway, Granted, but it malfunctions horribly. 2 minutes later you are charged on acts of terrorism.
I wish that I could make it rain.
19728
Post by: liquidjoshi
Granted. Acid rain, with no cover for you. You die as your flesh sloughs away from your bones in the most ironic death ever.
I wish I could do a barrel roll.
51344
Post by: BlapBlapBlap
Granted. You show your new trick to your friend, and accidentally roll of a cliff.
I wish that all GW models were made out of stale marshmallows.
47737
Post by: marmaduke
granted but now orks are awesome and all other armys are no longer usefull or relevent. all the MARSHMELLOWS
i wish i could think of something creative
49062
Post by: JohnnoM
granted but its already been thought of.
I wish I had the money to start a new 40k army.
51344
Post by: BlapBlapBlap
Granted. It's Draigowing.
I wish that I had a tank of Pirahnas
19728
Post by: liquidjoshi
Granted. The Tank wasn;t as fool proof as you thought, resulting in the Pirahna-pocalypse.
I wish I was a bird.
51344
Post by: BlapBlapBlap
Granted. Enjoy having your head bitten off by my cats!
I wish I could eat large amounts of sugar.
53375
Post by: hotsauceman1
Then you get diabetes.
I wish I was a MLP:FIM Pony
52525
Post by: Sonophos
Granted, you can now only consume sugar.
I wish that I was omnipotent
53375
Post by: hotsauceman1
But then you know the secret to the universe and are depressed about how simple it is.
Also i wish i had a girlfriend.
51344
Post by: BlapBlapBlap
Granted. Ever met the troll under the bridge in the Billy Goats Gruff?
I wish I had a suit of Terminator armour.
53375
Post by: hotsauceman1
You didnt mention what type or terminator, You are now Arnie.
I wish finecast would get fixed(you cant beat that!!!!, finecast cant get worse)
52525
Post by: Sonophos
Granted, but all they can make are necrons
I wish for nothing
53375
Post by: hotsauceman1
Wish granted, The world is turned to nothing.
I wish i was in ponyville.
19728
Post by: liquidjoshi
Granted, you have to take me with you.
I wish Tau would be the new game-breaking army, so people stop whining about Grey Knights.
51344
Post by: BlapBlapBlap
Granted. Just to let you know, it's at the bottom of the Marinas Trench.
I wish I could eat sugary foods at regular intervals.
52525
Post by: Sonophos
Granted You have type 2 diabetes
I wish Matt ward would do something productive and praiseworthy.
51344
Post by: BlapBlapBlap
Sonophos wrote:Granted You have type 2 diabetes
Too late, already have Type 1
Granted. He cooked a Pizza!
I wish that Star Trek never happened.
52525
Post by: Sonophos
Granted: Farscape is now the cult replacement
I wish I was a Ninja.
52525
Post by: Sonophos
BlapBlapBlap wrote:Sonophos wrote:Granted You have type 2 diabetes
Too late, already have Type 1
I kinda got that earlier but with type 2 you kinda have to do the regular thing.
51344
Post by: BlapBlapBlap
Sonophos wrote:BlapBlapBlap wrote:Sonophos wrote:Granted You have type 2 diabetes
Too late, already have Type 1
I kinda got that earlier but with type 2 you kinda have to do the regular thing.
But you can't have both...
Anyway...
You end up being burned at the stake for Witchcraft.
I wish that I were a submarine.
53375
Post by: hotsauceman1
Cool, But War was delared and yu where pushed into service.
I wish math wasnt required for all degrees.
52525
Post by: Sonophos
Granted, you end up with a meaningless degree and get a rewarding career that involves the words "good morning" at least 200 times every day.
I wish I were more intelligent.
53375
Post by: hotsauceman1
Good, But..... you have a brain the size of an elephant and cant move.
I wish dragons where real.
51344
Post by: BlapBlapBlap
Granted. Ever wanted to get a tour of a Dragon's digestive tract?
I wish that I was a baby.
53375
Post by: hotsauceman1
Granted, But, well your a baby.
I wish i have pyrokeneitic powers
51344
Post by: BlapBlapBlap
Granted. You are now a pile of ashes.
I wish that I could walk into walls.
52525
Post by: Sonophos
Granted but you always incinerate your alarm clock and have to spend a fortune on one everyday.
I wish that I had never been introduced to THE GAME.
I LOSE
51344
Post by: BlapBlapBlap
OK, but it's replaced with Das Spiel.
I wish that I was a Time Lord.
52525
Post by: Sonophos
Granted but you are one of the ones that never leave Gallifray (scuse spelling) and wears a huge poncey collar.
I wish I was more diplomatic.
51344
Post by: BlapBlapBlap
Granted. You, however, are now the Ambassador for North Korea.
I wish that people would listen to my ideas.
53375
Post by: hotsauceman1
Grantede, But then people hear EVERY idea you have(even the naughty ones)
I wish college didnt stress me out so much.
51344
Post by: BlapBlapBlap
Granted, but you fail every degree that you take.
I wish I had a cookie.
52525
Post by: Sonophos
Granted but it makes the world look like a slightly brighter world than your avatar.
I wish I had more time.
51859
Post by: Squidmanlolz
Granted, you live forever in a tuck everlasting-ish hell
I wish for world peace
51344
Post by: BlapBlapBlap
Granted. Unfortunately, we discover life on Mars, and start an interplanetary war.
I wish I had more cookies.
47737
Post by: marmaduke
granted but you break your leg and ankle and have to be put down
i wish infinity was more popular
53375
Post by: hotsauceman1
Granted, But prices go up.\
I wish i was a cowboy ninja zombie.
47737
Post by: marmaduke
granted but you cant ride a horse (none will take you) you cant draw a gun (your hand keeps falling off) and you dont even look like a cowboy (is that rag on your head a hat?)
i wish for cryx to get even better models
*now try to be original here please raise price has already been done *
53375
Post by: hotsauceman1
Granted, But they all are space marines.
I wish for a pony.
26674
Post by: Slarg232
Granted, but you ride her twice, get bored, and sell her to make glue.
I wish I had MAD SKILLZ!
52525
Post by: Sonophos
Granted but your horse runs away becauser you are a zombie and can't find you again coz you are a ninja so you end up just being a zombie with a silly hat and chaps.
I wish for everything to go really badly for everyone.
51344
Post by: BlapBlapBlap
Granted. Unfortunately, everybody dies before this happens, so you're the only person under this wish.
I wish I was a Necromancer.
52525
Post by: Sonophos
Granted but your creations are always highly attracted to you and can not stand to be away from you.
I wish I could teleport anywhere I want.
51344
Post by: BlapBlapBlap
Granted. You suffer a Deep Strike mishap in real life.
I wish that I had even more cookies.
40344
Post by: master of ordinance
Granted but there stale and the weevils have got to them
I wish for a nice girlfreind, my dream one
40344
Post by: master of ordinance
Sonophos wrote:Granted but you always incinerate your alarm clock and have to spend a fortune on one everyday.
I wish that I had never been introduced to THE GAME.
I LOSE
Thanks now i lose to.
51344
Post by: BlapBlapBlap
Granted. Unfortunately, she's also the ex of Johnny-Crass...
You do know who he (Or she...?) is?
I wish that my cookies burst into flames.
19728
Post by: liquidjoshi
Granted. Johnny- Crass then steals them.
I wish the Stormraven didn't look like a flying dumpster.
51344
Post by: BlapBlapBlap
Granted. It now looks like an Aviary Waste Storage Unit.
I wish that I ate lasers instead of food.
47737
Post by: marmaduke
Granted but they dont have any nutetional value so you die of starvation.
I wish i had a UNICORN!!!
51344
Post by: BlapBlapBlap
Granted, but it impales you and you start leaking rainbows...
I wish that I could replace my brain with a brick.
47737
Post by: marmaduke
BlapBlapBlap wrote:Granted, but it impales you and you start leaking rainbows...
I wish that I could replace my brain with a brick.
THAT SOUNDS AWESOME!!!!!!
anyway back on topic
you do but for some reason you get smarter....
I wish i was a hamster
51344
Post by: BlapBlapBlap
Granted, but you get stranded on a desert island and are slowly roasted alive by the natives.
I wish that people wouldn't cry.
52525
Post by: Sonophos
Granted but everybody goes blind due to lack of lacrimal fluid. The world collapses and everybody dies apart from the cybernetics department of Cambridge university who die out some years later because they are all male.
I wish for brevity.
31953
Post by: nomsheep
Granted.
But complex messages are now impossible get across.
I wish for more food.
Nom
54216
Post by: TheRobotLol
Granted.
But you can never stop eating, and explode shortly after consuming a waffer thin mint.
I with people would stop writing terrible fluff for 40k.
31953
Post by: nomsheep
Granted, but after all the codex writers are fired from gw, the company can't afford to rehire anyone and goes bust.
I wish I could cut my rats claws.
Nom
26674
Post by: Slarg232
Granted, but when you wake up tomorrow morning you find that YOU have rats claws.
I wish that I was handed millions of dollars out of the blue.
54216
Post by: TheRobotLol
Granted.
Then you wake up.
I wish I could assemble models quicker.
51859
Post by: Squidmanlolz
Granted, but you cut the hell out of your fingers with the Exacto
I wish I could paint my Catachans faster.
47737
Post by: marmaduke
Granted, but you now just army paint them blue
I wish Chaos begin to grow
51344
Post by: BlapBlapBlap
Granted, but it only happens in a small village in southern Yorkshire.
I wish that I was made of breakfast.
10104
Post by: snurl
Granted. You get pitched out with the leftovers and rot in a dumpster for a week until you are whisked off to a landfill and buried alive.
I wish for another bottle of crystal head. The last one was over way too soon.
51344
Post by: BlapBlapBlap
Granted. Brains or eyeballs?
I wish that my legs were turned into Beavers.
31953
Post by: nomsheep
Granted but they eat you alive when they get hungry.
I wish i had a nice pizza shop nearby.
Nom
47737
Post by: marmaduke
granted but it burns down when you order take out.
i wish i was in a video game
51859
Post by: Squidmanlolz
Granted. It's Fable: the Journey, HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
I wish I were a character on the Big Bang Theory.
54216
Post by: TheRobotLol
Granted. As A 10-second extra.
I wish this wish did nothing, as in it has no effect on anything, past, present and future.
51859
Post by: Squidmanlolz
Granted. Your wish is wasted.
I wish I had a FLGS within driving distance
31953
Post by: nomsheep
Granted, but now you live there and its full of sticky fingered kids.
I wish for more fish.
Nom
47737
Post by: marmaduke
Granted But they can now walk on land breath air and are out to eat you
I wish for the 3.5 codex back exaclty as it was
31953
Post by: nomsheep
Granted but noone will play cos of how broken it is.
I wish I could find a game of warmachine.
Nom
47737
Post by: marmaduke
Granted you do, but its in America that its being played
i wish more people played Warmachine
51344
Post by: BlapBlapBlap
Granted. They're all massive douchebags.
I wish that I could afford my Pre-Heresy Emperor's Children army.
52525
Post by: Sonophos
Granted. You have the money but you can't get hold of what you need anywhere. All you get is Out of stock messages.
I wish I could have anything I want.
51859
Post by: Squidmanlolz
Granted, you drown in the massive pile of granted wishes
I wish that the school year was over already
52525
Post by: Sonophos
Granted. You missed your exams and now have to repeat the year.
I wish I could be young again.
37912
Post by: black templar
Granted you are a sperm
I wish to be rich.
19728
Post by: liquidjoshi
Granted. Rich in appreciation of life. Unfortunately, you die alone as a greasy hobo.
I wish for world dominance.
10104
Post by: snurl
You got it. Then the game of risk is over.
I wish for hot girl gamer opponents.
5531
Post by: Leigen_Zero
Your wish has been granted! Your FLGS is now filled with Gamer Girl Opponents of Supreme Hotness!
Unfortunately none of them are your opponent, your stuck with the 300lb neckbeard with cheeto fingers and coffee-breath...
I wish for more bacon
52525
Post by: Sonophos
Granted. A 300lb pig lands on your head.
I wish I had an umberella
19728
Post by: liquidjoshi
Granted. Made out of magnesium, meaning it burns up in the rain.
I wish I was the batman.
52525
Post by: Sonophos
Granted. Your parents are dead and you have problems forming lasting relationships with anyone who isn't a wizened old codger.
I wish that Liquidjoshi knew the difference between Magnesium and Sodium.
19728
Post by: liquidjoshi
Granted. I am now a bit smarter.
I wish cruise control no longer worked.
3675
Post by: HellsGuardian316
Granted, Cruise control no longer works, motorists worldwide suffer accidents after switching on their cruise control only to deccelerate rapidly and cause accidents and pile ups galore. police looking into this strange phenomenon discover this thread and your wish that was granted, you are then sued 10's of thousands of times by motorists suffering injuries from their accidents in small claims court cases.
I Wish my PC would run faster
54216
Post by: TheRobotLol
Granted.
But it is not designed to, and soon explodes from overheating, and takes the surrounding three feet or so with it.
I wish for a three-wish genie.
23558
Post by: zedmeister
Damn Ninjas! Granted. Shame two have already been used up by others. I wish I had the discipline to go to bed earlier to get more sleep.
46864
Post by: Deadshot
Granted, but you will go into a coma.
I wish my wishes can't be corrupted.
54216
Post by: TheRobotLol
Granted.
It is however, wasted.
I wish my damn neighbours would shut up.
46864
Post by: Deadshot
Granted, they will die soon.
I wish I had a forest money tree and my last wish makes this one is incorruptable.
51344
Post by: BlapBlapBlap
Granted. However, wishes are not stackable, and the money tree burns to the ground.
I wish that I could win 40K games.
23558
Post by: zedmeister
Damnit, Ninja'd again!
Granted, unfortunately, all your future opponents are frustrated TFGs with each game reduced to grinding rules lawyering and elastic tape measuring.
I wish that I have a pleasant walk home.
46864
Post by: Deadshot
When you reach home a plane crashes into your house.
I wish I was Khorne Himself.
19728
Post by: liquidjoshi
Granted. Tzeench eventually overthrows you. I wish I was a Space Marine.
37912
Post by: black templar
2 Ninja's
granted but you die 10 seconds after you become one.
I wish to be a character from Mortal Kombat.
46864
Post by: Deadshot
I wish mortal Kombat goes bankrupt and you die off.
A corruption and a wish.
51344
Post by: BlapBlapBlap
Granted. It comes back as Mortal Combat, however.
I wish that I had a Top Hat.
46864
Post by: Deadshot
It has a rabbit inside. With diarrhea.
I wish I was a Vampire (as in real vampires not the Twilight crap).
19728
Post by: liquidjoshi
Deadshot wrote:It has a rabbit inside. With diarrhea.
I wish I was a Vampire (as in real vampires, just like Twilight!).
Well, if you insist...
I wish I was part of a syndicate.
23400
Post by: Ma55ter_fett
liquidjoshi wrote:Deadshot wrote:It has a rabbit inside. With diarrhea.
I wish I was a Vampire (as in real vampires, just like Twilight!).
Well, if you insist...
I wish I was part of a syndicate.
You are, but you're a character in this game…
…as an ordinary dude who stands between the protagonist and the end of the level cutscene.
I wish I was buff.
46982
Post by: MrMerlin
Problem is, I know a dog called buff. Sit, Buff!
I wish I could fly
37912
Post by: black templar
Granted you are a fly.
I wish I was a member of Metallica.
51344
Post by: BlapBlapBlap
Granted. However, you wrench Metallica apart in a matter of days.
I wish that my pinkie was gnawed of by rabid gophers!
23400
Post by: Ma55ter_fett
black templar wrote:Granted you are a fly.
I wish I was a member of Metallica.
Granted you are the new drummer...
...and all the old fans hate you.
I wish I could live forever
11892
Post by: Shadowbrand
Granted, though everyone you love will eventually die and you shall wander this Middle-Earth alone.
I wish I wasn't sick anymore.
46864
Post by: Deadshot
Granted but you pass it on to a GF/BF and they dump you.
I wish I was a better painter of 40k.
37912
Post by: black templar
Granted but you become so good everybody kills you for it.
I wish I could have all my dead relatives back.
19728
Post by: liquidjoshi
Damn, ninja'd Fine , they come back. As zombies. I wish I could slay Chuck Norris in Mortal combat.
51344
Post by: BlapBlapBlap
Granted. Unfortunately, he steps through the screen and destroys you.
I wish someone could do my last wish.
46864
Post by: Deadshot
Granted, but no one read it, including me.
I wishI could be a Herald of Khorne.
51344
Post by: BlapBlapBlap
Granted. You're killed in your first battle by a stampede of Squiggoths.
I wish that I was popular and well liked by all.
46982
Post by: MrMerlin
Granded. Well liked by gorillas that haven't seen a female in quite a while, that is....
I wish nobody would corrupt ma wish
46864
Post by: Deadshot
Granted, but you are too busy being popular you neglect your studies and end up a hobo then no.one likes yoj.
I wish I was Khorne's best Herald so he just kept making me new bodies!
46864
Post by: Deadshot
Damn Ninjas. Corrupting yours now.
Granted but it.is autocorrupted by Chaos because even my incorruptability wish got ignored. Because Chaos is begin to grow.
51344
Post by: BlapBlapBlap
No wish. So you end up with your head with a a rusty blunt nail slowly driven through your cranium.
I wish that people would remember to wish.
51344
Post by: BlapBlapBlap
I'm only counting the second post.
I wish that people would remember to wish.
46864
Post by: Deadshot
I did wish. But got ninjad so corrupted his wish.
Granted but people wish for your poverty.
I restate my wish. I wish I was Khorne's favourite so he kept making me new bodies.
54216
Post by: TheRobotLol
But the bodies Khorne gives you are all fat and blubbery and can't move. The chaos Gods are fickle things indeed
I wish for cheese, and cheese alone.
51344
Post by: BlapBlapBlap
Granted. You've been buried under a pile of Dairylea.
I wish for my house to burst into flames.
54216
Post by: TheRobotLol
But then it rains.
I wish I could eat my way out of the previously mentioned darylea heap.
46982
Post by: MrMerlin
But all the cheese was pissed on.....
I wish people would stop being rude on the internet
51344
Post by: BlapBlapBlap
Granted. Now people will start sending each other death threats and hiring assassins to take out internet enemies. Society grinds to a halt as it's every man for himself.
I wish that I could do Ork Scratchbuilding.
46982
Post by: MrMerlin
Granted. But you can't do anything else now. Not even breathing! Mwhahahahahaaa!
I wish I was an immortal ork
46864
Post by: Deadshot
I already send assassins and death threats via Facebook.
Granted. You can now build scratches on Ork Nobs.
I wish for a Power Fist to smite my enemies.
51344
Post by: BlapBlapBlap
Deadshot, type faster! You keep on getting ninja'd! Therefore, I'm doing MrMerlin's!
Granted. However, you have to ride Fluffy the Carnifex for eternity.
54216
Post by: TheRobotLol
However, it runs out of batteries only found in the year 40k.
I wish I was the undisputed king of cheese.
46864
Post by: Deadshot
Damn this phone!
Granted. You have a dairylea crown the sticks to your hair.
I wish I don't get ninjad.
51344
Post by: BlapBlapBlap
Granted. You get Samurai'd instead.
I wish for a rock.
54216
Post by: TheRobotLol
It starts a terror campaign against you, slowly driving you to madness and creeping paranoia.
I wish I could have a gold house.
46864
Post by: Deadshot
It collapses on.you.
I wish for a pony. To slaughter for the Blood God!
46982
Post by: MrMerlin
Grated. But It slaughters you!
I wish for a great idea!
46864
Post by: Deadshot
Granted but you forget instantaneously and can not remember.
I wish I remembered why I was outside the 40k forums in the first place.
51859
Post by: Squidmanlolz
Granted, It was because you were being trolled by the trolliest trollolol
I wish I could get my WM/H models soon
23400
Post by: Ma55ter_fett
Granted, but they are all fine cast and horribly disfigured.
I wish for a chocolate cake
32955
Post by: Coolyo294
Granted, but it's laced with arsenic.
I wish I was less confused by Centurion's ending.
26674
Post by: Slarg232
Granted, but the Cake was a lie.
I wish for my headache to go away.
54216
Post by: TheRobotLol
Granted.
And with it your head.
I wish I was a real life ninja.
57210
Post by: DemetriDominov
Granted. Arrow to the knee, you die due to the crappy hit detection that came with. I wish I was a Black Library Author.
46864
Post by: Deadshot
Granted but you fail training and are executed.
I wish I forget all of yesterday.
52525
Post by: Sonophos
Granted along with all the rest of your life before 10 minutes ago.
I wish I felt better.
19728
Post by: liquidjoshi
Granted. For three seconds.
I wish my cat had wings.
51344
Post by: BlapBlapBlap
Granted. It raises a massive legion and over throws the earth.
I wish that I was a bomb
52525
Post by: Sonophos
Granted. Click. You are a dud.
I wish i was immortal.
51344
Post by: BlapBlapBlap
Granted. You have no mouth and have to live in the local GW, and play a minimum of 5 TFGs a day or be left to swim in lava for eternity.
I wish that I had infinite incorruptible wishes.
46864
Post by: Deadshot
Granted but you waste them all on trivial things and lose them all.
I wish I could be an Ork Warlord.
52525
Post by: Sonophos
Granted but a bigger ork immediately kills you for your teef.
I wish I could enjoy a perfect life forever.
46864
Post by: Deadshot
Forever ends now.
I wish I was Gork/Mork
51344
Post by: BlapBlapBlap
Deadshot wrote:Granted but you waste them all on trivial things and lose them all.
You can't use up Infinite wishes.
Anyway.
You are. Unfortunately, you're in a Coma and doctors eventually have to pull the plug.
I wish that I had a pair of mittens.
46864
Post by: Deadshot
Those mittens are dead kittens.
46864
Post by: Deadshot
I wish for an actual PowerSword
51344
Post by: BlapBlapBlap
Granted. It's a proxy, however, and turns out to be a female guardsman. I wish that froth would pour out of my nose. Like fire extinguisher foam
52525
Post by: Sonophos
Granted. You have nasal rabies.
I wish that people would stop being so selfish.
51344
Post by: BlapBlapBlap
Granted. Now everyone has to share everything with you, meals, organs, vomit, over bodily fluids, disease...
I wish that I could shoot lasers out of my eyes.
52525
Post by: Sonophos
Granted but you are now blind due to the cauterising effects of laser light and they only act as pointers anyway.
I wish that I could issue one hundred or less orders each day to any person or group that will be obeyed no matter what.
51344
Post by: BlapBlapBlap
Granted. You're ordering about a group of anime characters.
I wish that dinosaurs would stamp on my enemy's face.
46864
Post by: Deadshot
BlapBlapBlap wrote:Granted. You're ordering about a group of anime characters.
I wish that dinosaurs would stamp on my enemy's face.
Granted but it is eaten by my attack dog with.built in forcefield (Toy Story)
I wish my sword-PROXY as a Female Guardsmen was true.
39033
Post by: ineptus astartes
yes. but it seems not to make any sense.
I wish I could get PS3 games in nepal. and they better have Space Marine.
51344
Post by: BlapBlapBlap
Granted. However, the moment you switch on your PS3 it explodes and your house burns to a cinder.
I wish that I could eat a raven. WHOLE.
39033
Post by: ineptus astartes
you do. it pecks and claws out of you through your digestive tract and leaves your intestines and colon a bloody ruin.
I wish for revenge on my enemies.
19728
Post by: liquidjoshi
Granted. As we all know, one good act of vengeance deserves another and they leave you swimming with the fishes.
I wish my post count would go up.
54216
Post by: TheRobotLol
Granted. And then you are banned.
I wish grey knights would END.
39033
Post by: ineptus astartes
Granted. but then they get reinstated.
51344
Post by: BlapBlapBlap
No wish. You have your face beaten in with a die-cast skillet.
I wish that I could breathe fire.
46864
Post by: Deadshot
Your face catches when you do.
I wish I had a girlfriend.
51344
Post by: BlapBlapBlap
Granted. It's a man in drag, as it turns out.
I wish I had a girlfriend.
54216
Post by: TheRobotLol
Granted. Its a Dog in drag, as it turns out.
I wish for a good new car.
39033
Post by: ineptus astartes
(Am I the only one here with a girlfriend?)
Granted, it's great, but then you find out she's a man.
I wish I was a primarch.
51344
Post by: BlapBlapBlap
Lolwut?
Anyway:
You are. You're Expunged. That guy was always good for a laugh or two.
I wish that I could shake hands with Jeebus.
23400
Post by: Ma55ter_fett
Granted, but he crushes your hand in his grip.
Wish I had a puppy
54216
Post by: TheRobotLol
Granted .But its a girlfriend in disgise
I wish for a little rain.
39033
Post by: ineptus astartes
granted. it is a little rain. too little rain. your last sight is the bleached bones of you neighbors on the cracked grounds
46915
Post by: Private_Joker
That little rain turns into an ever worsening flood the envelopes the worlds land mass. I wish for a sweet gaming PC.
46864
Post by: Deadshot
Granted but the neighbours steal it and clog it up with You-Know-What.
46864
Post by: Deadshot
I wish for a hat like Willa Wonka had in the original movie.
39033
Post by: ineptus astartes
you get it but it's really a pink horror.
46864
Post by: Deadshot
No wish. You get your 'ead crumped by Wardified Orks.
51344
Post by: BlapBlapBlap
No wish. You get your head beaten in by Tiger Woods.
I wish that my RPG would get more followers.
19728
Post by: liquidjoshi
Ok. They block it, causing the rocket to explode in the launcher, killing you.
I wish for eternal night.
51344
Post by: BlapBlapBlap
Granted. Without light, crops won't grow, and the entire planet starves.
I wish that I could eat marshmallows.
39033
Post by: ineptus astartes
granted but they taste bad.
I wish a good 40k movie would come out that I could get to and watch comfortably, preferably featuring the Avenging Sons or Night Lords.
46864
Post by: Deadshot
Granted but Matthew Ward wrote the scripta new Chaos codex.
I wish for a break.
47737
Post by: marmaduke
Granted You break Both your arms legs... and your neck
I wish everyone that said forever alone would get put on a blunt stake
23400
Post by: Ma55ter_fett
Granted a blunt stake is thrown on the ground and people take turns standing on it. Then they all go off the get laid and drink beer.
I wish for 2 more days before my trip to finish all my schoolwork.
47467
Post by: The Mad Tanker
Granted, but after you finish, all your homework lights on fire. I wish I owned an Imperial Guard Armored Company.
23400
Post by: Ma55ter_fett
Granted, However you and the rest of the pdf get involved in a bar-room brawl.
And are killed to the last man...
I wish I had a cookie
39033
Post by: ineptus astartes
granted. have a cookie.
I wish Games Workshop would advance the storyline for 40k.
46864
Post by: Deadshot
Granted, but Khorne says "Feth sake" and smites the Emp.
I wish I had more time on Dakka.
54216
Post by: TheRobotLol
Granted. Too much time on dakka. Before you know it, everyone is dead and you are old and your life wasted.
I wish for my next wish to be unable to corrupt in any way, shape or form.
46864
Post by: Deadshot
Granted. Unfortunately an unrelated illness puts you in a lifelong coma.
54216
Post by: TheRobotLol
No wish. Evil ensues.
I wish for an apple.
46864
Post by: Deadshot
Its poison. I wish I was out of school
40344
Post by: master of ordinance
Deadshot wrote:Its poison. I wish I was out of school
Granted. Unfourtunatley your interd at the all male sex offenders institution for life and have to share a cell with "Big" Bill who just happens to like other men.....
I wish Matt Ward was dead or fired so he couldnt write anymore terrible fluff.....
46864
Post by: Deadshot
I wish he was niether and people liked him.
10104
Post by: snurl
Granted. People like him, but then he writes another codex and is lynched by a mob of disgruntled fanboys.
I wish for some free time.
39033
Post by: ineptus astartes
You get all the free time in the world, you're fired.
I wish for more dakkka.
19728
Post by: liquidjoshi
Granted. Into your face, quite literally, by a mob of raging boyz.
I wish I could ride the Popemobile into battle.
39033
Post by: ineptus astartes
granted but it proves no match for mines.
51344
Post by: BlapBlapBlap
NO wish. You end up with your face being replaced with a fishbowl.
I wish that people would get my references.
46864
Post by: Deadshot
People get your references and crve your skull in because they hate them.
I wish I didn't take so long to type RPG sections.
40344
Post by: master of ordinance
Granted! You are still typing your responce to post 10 when there on post 100. your character is annialated.
I wish for porn
46982
Post by: MrMerlin
Granted. With fat guys and sheep.....
I wish for a bike
40344
Post by: master of ordinance
Granted but the seat breaks off and the jagged spike violates you analy
oh how I wish for rain (yes a nightwish quote from Nemo{the song}-lets see you pervert THAT)
46864
Post by: Deadshot
Granted, but it floods your house and your models melt because it is acid rain.
I was for my models to never, ever, be damaged, paint chipped etc.
50243
Post by: Castiel
Granted, but you cannot clip them off the sprue.
I wish I could skip the next 4 hours of today.
46864
Post by: Deadshot
Granted, but if you have watched Flight of the nvigator, you will know the corruption. If not, here.
I wish I had a decent brush.
52872
Post by: captain collius
Granted but a family memeber will destroy it.
I wish I didn't work with imbeciles
46864
Post by: Deadshot
Granted. You no longer have to work with Cruddace. They stick.you in the Finecast making bit.
I wish I had another good brush.
46982
Post by: MrMerlin
Granted, but you drop it before painting anything with it and the bristles are ruined.
I wish I had GD painting skills.....
46864
Post by: Deadshot
Granted. You enter the open category. You find the standard has dropped and people are entering their "dipper"£marines. A guys splashed Calgar Blue and Blue glaze on and wins Slayer Sword
I wish for another awesome brush! Tis my only wish.
46982
Post by: MrMerlin
Granted, but the guy next door is mad at you, so he smashes your door, grabs your brush and shoves it up your arse.
I wish for a plane
51859
Post by: Squidmanlolz
Granted. Using said brush incites the rage of Cthulhu upon you
I wish I had a desire to paint more
46864
Post by: Deadshot
Grante. Slanesh has claimed you and you ue blood to make red, tears to make white, urine for green/yellow, and faeces for darkness.
Wish is another new brush. I will keep wishing this untill someone runs out of corruptions or buys me a new brush (I would like a GW Large Brush, colour coded red). I will simply write wish=brush from now on.
46982
Post by: MrMerlin
Granted. You paint your complete surrounding in a bright yellow.....
I again wish for a plane
46864
Post by: Deadshot
Granted. oil pices rise to 50000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000 of all currencies, so you will not bne able to afford fuel.
Wish=brush
BTW, I don't mind the yellow bit.
46982
Post by: MrMerlin
Granted. You get this one:
I wish for 100 bucks
46864
Post by: Deadshot
Granted. Its stolen.
Wish=Brush.
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