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The next day you load the Boomdakka snazz wagon up with scrap and set out in the direction of ork town. Snazzkrump takes the wheel and drives while Grotskorcha mans the "Mek Speshul" gatling gun.


You don't have a map and the desert looks pretty much the same everywhere...

The giant red star looms high in the sky. It's not that hot, but the air is extremely dry.

Where is ork town again?

Snazzkrump rolls 1 success on intelligence +survival DN 3 (he only had 1 success, no complication at least).[You both suffer 1 shock damage from the exhaustion of driving for so long +SOOO MUCH BORING!]

They end up driving in circles for a really long time, probably half a day, but eventually Snazz gets the snazzwagon back on track.

You can see the smoke rising in the air beyond the horizon. That can only mean that ork town is close...at sort of close. It won't be long now.

And that's when you hear the sound of three Ork Warbikes roll down a large sand dune from behind you and start to close on you fast.

"SPEED FREAKS LET'S GO!" You hear a loud shout and the dakka guns start to rattle off rounds in your direction. None hit because they are out of range, but that won't be for much longer. The bikes are closing fast, and you quickly figure out that soon they will be close enough to open fire.

That's when Snazz notices the big red button on the wagon...

[Decision Time! Snazz can opt to drive at break neck speed, will increase chance of wrath complications for everything as 3 wrath dice are rolled while driving that fast, but it will doubel the speed of the Snazzwagon]

[Other option is to drive regular at regular speed. The bikes will be in range within 1 turn. Or just hit the brakes and stop. But why?]

[For Grotskorcha, you will be able to shoot at the bikes when they come into range this round. It will be DN 5 to shoot at 1 bike but if you go full auto you can take an extra 3 dice] [If you go break neck speed roll 3 wrath dice instead of 1] [Also, Mek Speshul has the WAAAGH ability +1 dice for that]

[Grotskorcha can also try for a multi attack. In that case, if you go full auto, no bonus dice but you can shoot at two targets at DN 4 or all 3 targets at DN 6] [One roll to hit two targets at once or all three at once]

SnazzKrunk’s hand hovers over the button. Part of him just can’t resist the urge to hit the thing, the roar of the engine, the press of acceleration, the thrill of speed!

But then again. There was the other thing that SnazzKrunk really liked, maybe even more, a real good scrap.

Slapping the button now felt a little bit too much like running away.

No, he kept both hands on the wheel and steered a course for the town. He would try and hold it steady and give GrotSkorcha a solid chance to even up the odds with a good opening shot.

You ready Skorcha? Don’t let da dust make yer eyes twitch. You get a bead on da biggest git on da biggest bike an’ I’ll keep dis wagon rollin’ steady till you makes it go Boom! DakkaDakkaDakka!

Three wrecked bikes would make for some pretty good scrap too.

As they board the Boomdakka Snazzwagon, Grotskorchas smile seems to widen until the top of his hat is about to fall of. "Dats a Mekk Speshul, Dats what dis is! An' a darn good un'!" he exclaims with the tone of a true connaisseur of good dakka and caresses the heavy weapon tenderly. "Tanks for takin da weel Guv! Dat will be fun!".
While they drive to Orktown, Grotskorcha is completely absorbed in studying all details of the mighty weapon and aiming it at phantom enemies made up in his mind - while all his mental strength is invested in not just triggering it to enjoy the heavy booming. So he doesn't really realize Snazzes problems in finding the right way. Instead he prays to Mork and Gork to please, PLEASE send some target their way and not let him waste this opportunity.

And the Gods have mercy upon his soul. As the three Warbikes approach, Snazz decides to hold the buggy steady and tells him to go for the leader, he bellows back "DAMN SNAZZ! ME TOLD YA DATS A MEKK SPESHUL! WEZ DONT HAVE TO GO FOR ONE O'DEM!" And taking as carefull of an aim as he can with the heavy gatling gun, he aims for the most leftern bike, presses the trigger and holds it firmly while he sends the barrels spinning and drowns a straight line across all three bikes in a storm of bullets, slugs and bolts.
"BRRRRRRTTTTTTTT!!!!!"
The roar of the gun is deafening, his ears ring before going deaf and the kickback almost breaks his wrists, but the young boy indeed manages to keep the fire on point until he reaches the bike to the right. Roaring in frantical delight and hysteria, he yanks happily at the guns handles... and something cracks below it. "OHHH... Mork... dats not guud..." Grotskorcha mutters with raising panick, as he struggles to handle the Mekk Speshul that he just by accident has broken of its bipod.

At least he doesn't drop it - yet - but if he wants to fire it at all it will be from the hip next time... "uhh... Big Toof won't like dat..."

‘Oly Zoggin’ Gork-on-a-stick Skorcha! You been wastin’ your time scorching grots, I reckon, if you can shoot like dat! Three bikes wif one Dakka! MorkAlmighty!

As soon as the bikes enter long range Grotskorcha lets loose with an absolute hail of bullets, which rain down on all three bikes at once.

You see one bike starting to leak fuel profusely while another suffers a minor explosion. The orks snarl and shout in dismay but keep the petal to the metal and soon they've closed to within 25 meters. Despite the furious rate of fire the Mek Speshul only did minor damage to the bikes.

Then the bikes respond with a hail of their own dakka guns and soon Grotskorcha and Snazzkrump start hearing the loud pinging sounds of rounds ricocheting off the hull of the buggy. But for the moment, the buggy's armor is deflecting the hail of fire.

Up ahead Snazzkrump can see nothing but sand and open desert with the ork town looming on the horizon. Perfect conditions to crank the speed all the way up to the max.

[Bike 1: 8 out of 10 Wounds left, fuel leak, will run out of fuel in 1 hour] [Bike 2: 7 out of 10 Wounds left, Bike 3, 8 out of 10 wounds left] [No damage to your Boomdakka Snazzwagon!]


Round 2:

[Bikes are 25 meters behind you. By the end of next turn they will close the gap to 10 meters assuming all vehicles continue at max speed. If you don't go break neck speed and the bikes do than the bikers will probably be trying to cut you both up with choppas at close range, or maybe even crazier stuff like rams or trying to jump on board the snazzwagon]

[Turn order will be either Snazz or Grotskorcha, then Biker 1, then Snazz or Grotskorcha (whichever one of you didn't go first) then the other two bikes]

[Shooting Options: Snazzkrump can hop onto the mounted Big Shoota which is also attached to the Boomdakka Snazzwagon. This is probably easier than trying to fix and reload the Mek Speshul]

[Options for the Big Shoota: Multi-attack with full auto=DN 4 to hit all three targets or DN 3 to hit two targets. [Only bonus+1 die for WAAAGH] [You can also go for a called shot against one of the ork driver's. DN 5, with only 1 bonus die for WAAAGh, but if you hit, it actually hits the driver and not the bike itself, which would stand a good chance of just killing the ork outright]

[Driving options: Keep the vehicle goin at maximum normal speed, hit the brakes to stop, or hit the big red button to travel at breakneck speed. Will cause Grotskorcha to use 3 wrath dice instead of 1 if he shoots after you move. But the bikes will have to start using 3 wrath dice if they want to keep pace with you]

Nice shootin Skorch! Give em’ anuvver taste of dakka an’ see if you can put one of those gitz down for good! Den hold onta your gak cause I’m gonna hit da boosta!

Grotskorcha lets the torn of Mekk Speshul slide down into the Dragsta, hoping it will not get lost and that he might find someone to fix it back in place before Big Toof tears him a new one. But now was not the time to ponder on that "Got it, Guv!" he shouts back and graps the big shoota to aim for what he assumes to be the leader of the trio of attackers. Lets see if the ork driver is a more thankful target then the bikes themself...



Gork and Mork (or maybe Mork and Gork?) are with him and once again Grotskorcha proofs to be pretty proficient when it comes to Dakka... He aims for the heavy brow of the Greenskin and lets loose with a short, aimed burst that slamms into the thick skull hopefully doing enough damage to at least get one of the bikes of their arses.

The large ork biker takes several direct hits from the big shoota, causing him to lose consciousness. Less than a second later, he falls right off his bike and the bike falls flat onto the sand.

"SPEED FREAKS WAAAGH!" The second biker hits the thrusters and rolls right up alongside the Snazz Wagon. He lashes out at Grotskorcha with his choppa, aiming to cut his leg off at the knee, but misses entirely. Then, the leaking fuel ignites and the bike becomes enveloped in flames.

In a panic, the biker slams on the brakes, loses his grip on the handlebars and goes flying.

Then Snazzkrump hits the big red button and the Snazzwagon starts going super fast.

Soon, the last remaining bike is far behind in the distance and you lose sight of him. It looks like that biker gave up the chase to help his fallen comrads regroup.

Just as the Snazzwagon's thrusters begin to wear out, you notice that you have reached ork town.

There is no gate, or roads, it's just one minute you are driving through sand and the next minute you are surrounded by mud grot hovels and bulky concrete shanties and ramshackle workshops.

Various ork vehicles and orks of all different clans press in next to each other, heading to a large open air market, the job pole or to one of the slop shops, or brewhouses.

In large glyphs you see a sign that says: " ORK TOWN, PROPERTY OF SKEPTI-MEK NO KRUMPING UNLESS IT IS IN FIGHTING PITTS OR ON A HOLI-KRUMP DAY]


As if to impress that point, you observe a Mega Nob in mega armor skewer two orks with a power claw that had started shooting at each other with their sluggas.

It seems unlikely the speed freaks will attack you here...

[Terrible rolling on my part Yarghhh!]

Looking around for a likely yard to drive in with the scrap SnazzKrunk is feeling a little surly having missed an opportunity to get stuck in with his choppa. He doesn’t know who will give him the best deal for the scrap or for fixing up the mekk speshul. Come to think of the mekk speshul…

Oi, Skorcha. You betta pass dat Mekk Speshul up ‘ere in da front where it won’t get mixed up in da scrap pile. Bigtoof will ‘ave our knees broke if we lost dat!

Now where you wanna sell dis gak?

Grotskorcha can't deny to be somewhat happy that he didn't get his leg chopped of. Mostly because he had his doubts, if the scrap they had would be enough to get all the stuff they needed AND a new leg. Anyway, they fought of the bikes and that was good. Only a shame they couldn't get some more scrap from the wracks, but if they stopped they might loose the Boomdakka Snazzwagon and than Big Toof would surely krump them to paste.

As they enter Orktown he looks around with his chest swolen with pride. He wasn't just some small little yoof anymore, now he was a proper boy! And he wanted all the world to see it.
Meanwhile he carefully hands down the mekk speshul as Snazz recommended "Gud tinking Snazz. Wouldn't want dat beauty to go missin'"
Regarding the question where to sell the scrap, he shruggs his shoulders. "I iz havin' no idea. Lets just pick some shack and try to get as much as wez can for it. And then wez get ya to da doc first. If ya rokkin on your best again, no one can stup us, Snazz!"

Zog it!

SnazzKrunk doesn’t have all day. He’s got to find a Doc, a Mek and a Shaman and short of walking into a bar in a joke-book he doesn’t think that’s very likely. So he figures he’ll just make himself conspicuous and Hope one or two useful orks find him.

Rolling up through the main market square he drives the wagon towards the Job Pole making a lot of noise, revving the engine like a Speed Freak and hollering loudly at no one in particular.

Hiring, Likely Boyz for a right proppa scrap! None of yer weedy gits, Boss BigToof demands only boyz wot ain’t scared of nuffink an’ can clobber a right-big mutie like wot a proppa Orky lad can!

He revs the engine impressively and repeats his hollering hiring pitch so all the lads at the job pole can hear it.

Give is a blast from da Skorcha, there Skorch, up high so’s everyone can see it!


Assuming GrotSkorcha agrees and the effect is well impressive and hasn’t resulted in anything else catching fire that shouldn’t.


SnazzKrunk picks some enthusiastic boys out of the crowd. He’s looking for some decent looking orks but not too tough, so he and GrotSkorcha can stay in charge; Someone carrying a spanner maybe or a snakebite boy painted in glyphs.


[not sure if you can give me an idea of who is at the job pole today and if I can impress them to join us through sheer.Willpower!]

You! You! And you! Come on if you fink you is tough enough. We ain’t got all day.

[Snazz rolls 1 die for fellowship (yes that's a characteristic) and 1 for the assist from Grotskorcha. DN 1 with each success recruiting an ork. Wrath critical. 1 glory earned and 2 orks recruited]

Most of the orks grunt in approval but don't seem interested in what Snazz has to say. "Wait...that's not a Nob. Only gonna follow a nob..or sumfin bigger den a nob," They mutter.

Despite that, you find two ork boyz, sporting ragged blue colored clothing that are all too willing to sign up for the cause.

"Nob or not wez in for a right gud fight. Litz go!" They shout eagerly brandishing choppas and sluggas.

Meanwhile the market has its own ups and downs for Grotskorcha and Snazzkrump.

A Mek eagerly buys the spare scrap for a handful of teef, which you then use to pay the Mek to re-attach the Mek Speshul. You are also able to wrangle a little more fuel for the skorcha out of the deal.

But unfortunately...no amount of wheeling and dealing is able to secure a Big Choppa for Snazzkrump [influence roll was a bust. Not my fault the game lists Big Choppa as a Rare item lol. Every Mrk gives you the same response. "Dats only for Nobs...not for boyz!"]

Eventually you stumble upon a shanty with the Glyph of an Ork Pain boy...and a Shaman. Looks like a two for one deal!

Grotskorcha is of course no slouch when it comes to using his burna and makes a good show if it to impress the Boyz at the job pole, incinerating a low flying winged squig in the process.

As the two "blue boyz" come over to join them, he gives them a friendly punch in the shoulders "Oi, names Grotskorcha, and dat over dere is my buddy Snazzkrunk. Weez da boyz of Big Toof, da biggest and baddest Nob ya lot has eva seen!" he advertises their new employer a tiny bit overselling him. "If ya want ta krump, ya came to da right spot. Just yestaday, da two of us krumped 5 or 6 muties. Hard ta tell, as dere wasn't much left of dem, when weez waz dun!" he keeps on bragging to get his new comrades in the right mood. "So wadda youz called, compadres?"

The first one, a short and heavy set type with a long scar across his face an an eyepatch with a krudely drawn eye on it (augmetics were to expensive for him yet) introduces himself "Me iz Evuleye!" while the other - a relatively slender, tall ork with lots of pockmarks on his face hesitates a moment, as he realizes that THIS is the opportunity to give your self a cooler name than you used so far and then answers "Name is BoomMaw Snazzdakka Squiggotslasher... the third!"

"Yeah... sure... Squigslasher sounds about right..." Answers Grotskorcha much to the frusttration of the boy, who has overplayed his hand. "Whateva, try again with da boss when weez get to camp. Hez da boss after all."



They get lucky with the Mekk Speshul which looks as good as new, when the Mekks are finished - pew, that was close - but unfortunatly there no Big Choppa for Snazzkrump yet. Seems it pays off to be good in dealing with other orks, but that was not their strongsuit... yet.

The shanty with the Glyphs looks promising though. Lets see what the Painboy and Shaman have for them

The shaman's shanty contains all manner of bizarre looking things. Carefully preserved human heads, augmetics, a giant "urty" syringe with some weird writing on it, i.e. things you would see in a pain boyz hut. But also a weird crystal ball, crude paintings of ork glyphs on the walls of the hut, and even a crystal ball lying around in a dusty corner.

The shaman himself is wrapped up in all manner of torn up, filthy rags and is even wearing a hood around his head. He has the symbol of the snake bite clan adorned on his clothing.

"I had a vision....Mork and Gork sent it to me. And he said you would be coming....and it was about needin medicine for yah chest, is that about right?" He points to Snazzkrump as he does so.

He grins. "Well yah came to the right place. Wargrit's the name and I'm a pain boy alright. But I do things accordin to da old ways. Propah orky medicine."

He looks at Snazzkrump's chest and nods. "Looks like you got a taste of the sick green stuck inside yah. I got sumthin for that...for about." He counts on his fingers. "Three...three teef. I should probably charge more, but anything higher than three and mi ead starts urtin."

After collecting said teef, Wargrit walks over to a primitive woodfire stove and starts boiling some water and mixing in various herbs while chanting reverently. "Sick green weak, orks are strong. Supah-tea make sick green gone."

He then presents the tea to Snazzkrump and upon its consumption, Snazzkrump would begin to feel much better.

Wargrit grins. "It worked didn't it? See der's no ailment conjured up by da sick green tha Ol Wargrit doesn't have a rem-ity for. Dats why Iz da best painboy in ork town.

"You ladz need anyfing else ?"

SnazzKrumk pulled up to the shack where Squigslasha had recommended he should look for “Da bestest ShamanDocta in town.” and he looked at the sign dubiously. He recognised the Urty syringe glyph and the whirly looking waaagh power glyph, but there was no sign of a bloody saw glyph, like a right propa doc would have up.


Are you sure dis is da place? I got me a right dodgy chest wot needs seen to by a right propa pain boy.


“Ow, is it ‘urty?” The new boy mocked, even his painted-on eye seemed to twinkle with laughter.


I’ll Urt you inna minute, you GakGob! Nobody goes to da Painboy wot’s scared of a bit of pain, does dey?
When I get out of dis doc’s surgery I’ll have da meanest-biggest-baddest-orkiest scar on me chest, in like glyphs like wot wierdboy’s use for like waaaa-par!


“Like a Par-Scar?” GrotSkorcha’s eyes grew wide. What crazy talk was this? Maybe his friend was finally going delirious. It was most definitely time to see the doc. “Alright, ladz, let’s get Snazza in to see da doc den.”

we’ve just seen how it goes when they get in to see the “Doc”

SnazzKrunk looks at Squigslasha a bit confused.

I thought you sed dis was a real propa pain boy. Good fer scarz and dat?

“He always gives me good stuff for my spotz.” Wheedles Squigslasher. “It makes ‘em scar up real good!” He presents his undeniably pox-scarred gob for inspection.

SnazzKrunk looks to his chest half expecting a miraculous scar to appear.

“I hopes da medicine wasn’t too Urty for ya!” Guffawed Evuleye.

SnazzKrunk gives him a cold stare and turning to the shaman makes his first suggestion of what else they might need.

Dis git ‘ere needs a new eye, if you got one handy. Dat fing wot he drew on looks like a Grox’s Arsehole.”

I tells you wot, Where we is goin’ dere’s so much Sick green gitz dat I was lookin’ for a right proppa choppa for to smash ‘em all wif. But da market’s full of weedy gits wif weedy choppas wot won’t give a fella what he wants. But you ain’t like dat Doc! I can see you always got wot da boys need. I reckon you could make dis-here choppa of mine dead Killy to sick-green gitz, am I right? Some special Orky-green waaagh power that gets right stuck in to their sick-greenyness and really does da bizzness? You wouldn’t be wastin’ your time I’d get it right stuck in I would!

Wargrit grins.

"Oh so you wanted a scar ta go with it? No problem yah can av dat one free of charge!"

He quickly grabs a knife from his belt and makes a quick slice into Snazzkrump's chest. Not anything that Snazzkrump even feels as an injury. For an ork it would register more like a bug bite. But it's definitely a noticable wound.

"Now what's that about an eye?" He starts to leer toward the other ork with a knife but then he gets distracted.

"Oh...the Big Choppa. Now a propah Big Choppa is ard to come by. But, if yah fight in the pits an win, yah can zoggin well av whatever you want!"


"Of course...ain't you in a hurry ta git back ta sum big fight with dese muties and this Dark Lord fella? Gork and Mork seemed keen on makin sure dem sick green gits get krumped...at least dat wot I fink my latest visions meant. Can nevah be too sure."

"Wait...wots dat. Yah want da blessing of Gork and Mork for yah choppa? Sure sure."

He sprinkles some of the leftover tea onto his choppa.

"Gork and Mork, make dis choppa extra choppier so it can propah krump da Dark Lord of evil gitz!"


Decision Time!

Stick around town and have a go in the fighting pits. If you win, you can have any rare item (or anything less rare).

Head back to the fort!

SnazzKrunk is a bit miffed, he squints at his new “scar” trying to make it into a recognisable glyph but it comes to nothing. His outstretched choppa too is summarily ignored as the doc goes off to inspect the empty eye socket of his newest patient. SnazzKrunk spots the soggy herbs in the bottom of his medicine horn.

He bangs out the tea-leaves onto the blade of his weapon and rubs them into the scratches and scrapes of the tarnished metal. That ought to do the trick, he reckons.
Wargit, as he shambles past, going about his business, spots what SnazzKrunk is up to and pauses. He doesn’t say anything, he just hocks a gob of spit onto the blade and winks.

Jobsagoodun’.

"I reckonz it wouldz be very cunnin to have dem tea wit us, when weez go back in da cave. Could ya fill a barrel for us? Or at least a little boddle? Or ya might cam with us, if youz like. Fight da sick green head on, like in da old days and ways!" Grotskorcha tries to charm the Shamandoc into joining their little endeavor.

As the notion of Snazzkrunk fighting for a bigger chopper stands in the room, Grotskorche is of course all in for supporting his friend and cheers him on "Com'on Snazz! Dem other Boyt her aint go not fight in dem! Theiz can't do with da big choppas what yuz can do withit! Lets go and ya show dem! And den we get back to da tunnels and show da muties!"

nah! Dem pit fightin’ gitz is just posers and show-offs. It’s all Flyin’ ‘ead butts an’ “pile-drivers” an’ German suplexes, I mean, wotz a German Suplex? It ain’t Orky woteva it iz. Dey makes it up as dey goes along to get da betting stakes up an’ den da bosses decides da winner, is who will makes dem da most teef! Not for dis Ork! I gots Muties to Krunk! And wif Shaman Wargit on our team dishin’ our da Waaagh hurt, dem Muties gonna go squealing’ off to their DarknLord git an’ den when he comes a stompin we gets to Krumpin! Dats wot real Orks is fightin for! Right Doc?

Wargrit grins.

"I'm feel da power of da WAAAGH is building around yahz. Some big stuff gonna be happening, an Iz wants ta be there!"

[We'll say your time in the town counts as a respite so Re-set all wrath to 2 and your shock damage has recovered]

After stopping for a quick squig snack and a fungus brew, the the group sets off in the Boomdakka snazz wagon, heading back for the fort, all the way across the desert The big red sun hangs low in the sky, but you seem to be on track to get back before dark.

This time, Snazz doesn't get lost. He seems to have a keen sense of direction.

However, on the horizon towards where the fort should be, you notice a large black plume...perhaps smoke? But you don't smell smoke, only the overwhelming scent of death and decay.

Then you hear the loud sound of warbikes tearing up the sand behind you firing their dakka guns wildly at you in long range. You recognize this is the same mob that attacked you earlier and they are gaining fast once again, but still well out of range.


Wargritt starts laughing maniacally. AHA HAHAHA. GO RIDE TA DA FORT FAST. SPEED FREAKS HERE TA HELP, DEY JUST DON'T KNOW IT YET!"

HOLD ONTA YOUR GAK BOYZ! WE ABOUT TO GO FASTER DAN A WHIPPIT-SQUIG ON ROKKIT SKATES!

It’s big red button time! ~ SMASH~

The snazzwagon pushes its scrappy frame to the limit as the thrusters ignite. Shortly afterwards the snazz wagon crests over a hill, and gets some serious airtime before crashing back down again.

The fort is coming up fast, and it looks like a major battle is underway.

Swarms of big black flies are everywhere obscuring lines of sight but you can figure out pretty quickly that a small horde of mutants, armed with primitive firearms and melee weapons, and even stranger things is trying to storm the fort.

The gate of the fort has been reduced to rubble, but Big Toof and his mob of boyz appear to be holding the gap, as a mob of mutants pushes against them in a big scrap.

Towering above the mutant horde is a large spawn of chaos. The hideous mutating monstrosity had been behind the mutant mob ready to charge in and finish Big Toof. But it turns in place as it hears you approach.

Further off, you see around three plague bearers and...someone or something behind the plague bearers. You can't see what or who, only a hint of greenish armor.


You get a sickening sense that the Dark Lord might be here...but also excitement. The orks know this is going to be a good fight!

Your allies, (the two boyz) and the shaman jump off the snazz wagon as soon as possible and start charging toward the mutant horde by the gate. Wargritt grins.

"Let's get stuck in ladz! WAAAGH!"

The bikes meanwhile forget about chasing you and start heading straight for the plague bearers in the distance.

That just leaves Snazzkrump and Grotskorcha and the Boom dakka snazz wagon to deal with the massive Chaos spawn that is charging your way.

[Combat will just focus on Snazz + Grotskorcha vs the chaos spawn]

[Turn order: Snazz or Grotskorcha, then spawn, then Snazz or Grotskorcha (whichever one didn't go first).

[Distance to target is about 10 meters]

[Options: Snazz can get out of the driver's seat and throw a stikk bomb, or he could ram the thing...or ram and throw a stikk bomb? Or charge toward the thing while shooting his slugga]

[Grotskorcha can light the thing up with the Mek Speshul, DN is only 1, or get out, grab your skorcha, move up, and light it up with the skorcha]

SnazzKrunk spins the wheelz and lets the engine roar, holding the Snazzwagon in place with the breaks.

Fill dat ugly git full’o Dakka, GrotSkorcha!

SnazzKrunk watches as the spawn shambles toward them through a hail of bullets. Wheels spinning, engine primed for a devastating burst of speed. He’s never played chicken with a charging spawn before but he’s leaning on the break and as soon as the thing gets close enough it’s gonna be Ram Time!

Grotskorcha feels a warm feeling of camradry, as Snazzkrump leaves him some time to fire before ramming that ugly beast. That really showed leadership quality of his friend, as a good leader lifts his subordinates up and helps them become their best self.
" 'ERE WE GO!!!" Grotskorcha screams happily, as the barrels of the Mekk Speshul start to spin, before his voice is drowned out by the sweet sweet symphony of tons of dakka, tearing into the big, ugly spawn. Flesh rips, bones break, horns shatter and puss, blood and viscery spray everywhere in response and to the delight of the present orks, but Grotskorchas enthusiasm with the Mekk Speshul seems to be a bit much for the weapon again. Or maybe it is just not build for a proper Ork Boy... or maybe it's a sign of Mork and Gork, that Grotskorcha should stick to skorching things. Anyway, something in the Speshuls mechanism breaks, a metallic screaming and screaching makes everybodies ears ring and with a loud bang, the thing basically tears itself apart into a bunch of barrels flying everywhere. Grotskorcha gets hit by several of them, leaving him quite battered, but the adrenalin of the fight carries him through for now. "GROT DAMMIT!" he curses anyway and holds on as tight as he can, as Snazz catapults the Snazzwagon forward to ram it. As soon as he can he will grab his trusty new flamer, jump out and do this "the oldfashioned way"

As the distance closes between the wagon and the unspeakable hideousness of this chaos-spawned abomination, SnazzKrunk’s life flashes before his wide, red eyes.

But not the life he has lived, crawling from the spawning pits to the job pole, from the scrap caves to the dusty desert, no. This was a life full of fighting and glory and the deafening roar of Goffik Rock music!

There upon the stage he stands, amidst a glorious pyrotechnic display, his instrument wrought of the massive, twisted bones of some grotesquely mutated beast. Thumping out the heavy tones of a thunderous waaaagh-worthy anthem.

SnazzKrunk! SnazzKrunk! SnazzKrunk! The transfixed mob of orks chant, their voices rising with fanatic intensity.
SnazzKrunk! SnazzKrunk! SnazzKrunk!

This is the life! This is something to live for! This is what SnazzKrunk was spawned to be!

The chant is still echoing in his ears as the Snazzwagon shudders with an immense impact.

[The Mek Speshul deals out so much damage that it kills the spawn outright. I spend 1 ruin to give it back 1 wound and keep it alive. It charges the vehicle and attacks it with tentacles dealing it 8 out of 11 wounds but it rolls a complication meaning that the tentacles become trapped under the tires and its finally crushed to death. Snazzkrump takes 1 shock and Grotskorcha takes 3 shock, which then converts to 2 shock and 1 wound since his max shock is 2. So Grotskorcha down to 5 wounds. In addition both characters are hindered (+1 DN all tasks next turn). Grotskorcha is also exhausted, only basic moves allowed, no aiming, salvo fire, muti-action etc. You see, willpower is a good thing to buy with XP!]

Brrrrrrt.. literally hundreds of shells ram home into the spawn blowing huge chunks of its mutating writhing flesh. It goes down for a moment, but then it's up again, mutating into some giant octopus looking anemenoe thing that charges in and lashes out at the snazz wagon, trying to do as much indiscriminate damage as possible. The impact of the tentacles literally knocks the vehicle off course and smashes out huge sections of the chasis, but then the tentacles somehow get trapped under the wheels and then...kerchunk, splat. The snazzwagon travels right over the spawn and keeps moving.

Other than some serious whiplash, jammed up Mekspeshul, and seriously damaged chasis, the boyz made it through alright.

Looking around you see how the battle is progressing. Big Toof and the boyz seem to be making steady progress in chopping through the mutie horde. You reckon it won't be long now before they are all propah krumped.

In the distance though you see one of the bikes literally go flying 20 feet in the air and come crashing down nearby, its driver crushed lifelessly beneath the wreck.

That's when you see him. Bearing the green armor of the Deathguard with a plague belcher in one hand a wicked chainsword in the other hand. He is standing there alone in the distance, the wreckage of the ork bikes all around him. He looks at you with total hatred, evil red blazing through the slits of his helmet.

The Dark Lord is here....35 meters away.

DECISION....

1. Try and fix the Mek Speshul....DN 3 Intelligence, +1 dice if your fellow player assists

2. Keep driving and run that git over...breakneck speed!

3. Take cover and hide behind the Snazzwagon and shout for help. Maybe someone will save us!

Oi, GrotSkorcha. You still dere?

There was grunt and the sound of a heavy metal fuel tank clanking against the side of the wagon. The burna boy was getting kitted up for a fire storm.

SnazzKrunk tested the engine. The exhaust buckets had been torn clean off one side and something was whining under the hood. It didn’t sound like a grot rigger. He let the vehicle lurch forward and heard a squelching beneath the wheels.

Oh, dat’s where dat fing went.

Something caught SnazzKrunk’s eye. Something red in the sky. It was a motorcycle. The thing was spinning like a firework on Gork-Forks night, the rider clinging on like its tail of sparks. It crashed to the ground at the feet of the thing that had launched it; An armoured giant, standing more than 8 feet tall in sick-green armour.

The doomed speed-freak made a last, futile attempt to disentangle his broken body from the twisted metal of his wrecked bike but the Deathguard Marine spun up its chainsword and casually eviscerated both ork and bike in one fell stroke.

Oh it’s like dat izzit! You wants to play wif da big boyz now, eh?

Seeing the thing, standing there, dishing out punishment on the orks like some kind of big-nob-boss-fella made SnazzKrunk’s blood boil. The engine of das SnazzWagon revved up to a fever pitch in response.

The Plaguemarine looked up, total hatred blazing through the red eye-slits of his helmet.

SnazzKrunk was in a rotten mood. Just seeing that sick shade of green made him want to puke. Gork almighty, how he hated that thing! Almost unconsciously he reached for the stikkbomb, a grim plan forming within his dense orkish skull.

You best get out now Skorch. Go wif Gork. I’ll catch up wif you laterz.

Whether his buddy heard him over the roaring engine or not it made little difference. They were of one mind. GrotSkorcha’s boots were already on the sand and advancing on the enemy.

‘I hope BigToof ain’t too precious about his old wagon.’ Thought SnazzKrunk.

Zog BigToof! It’s a SnazzWagon iznt’ it! An’ I’m SnazzKrunk! Waaaaaaaagh SnazzKrunk!

With that the vehicle lurched forward, the huge spinning tires tearing up the sand. WaaaghSnazzKrunk was gaining momentum, passing the hunched marching figure of GrotSkorcha, eating up the short distance between them and the burning-eyed hatred that awaited, drawing him inexorably closer as if by force of pure willpower alone.

Realising, with not a moment to spare that the time was now if it was not already too late SnazzKrunk yanked the pin from his stickbomb and ditched it in the cab before bailing out the door.

He tumbled into the sand and rolled head-over-arse as the explosive-primed SnazzWagon approached its inevitable SnazzKrunk.

Shaken and discombobulated it was all SnazzKrunk could do to remember to keep his head down and not gawp at the spectacle as the stikkbomb went off.

As Snazzkrump asks, if Grotskorcha is still there, he also hears a somewhat pained grunt, as his friend has withered the impact a bit less well. None the less, they get more or less the same idea and the freshly apointed burna boy slips on his fuel tank as quickly as he can, grabs the flamer and struggles to jump out of the Snazzwagon as soon as possible.
He punches the side of the buggy with a fist, to signal that he is clear and shouts "Frakk dat Frakker off real gud! See ya on da other side!". He himself starts to jogg as fast as he can without tripping and exhausting himself, smacking the pilot flame of the burna on. The Dark Lord looks quite a lot more threatening as his minions, but Grotskorcha is not afraid. If anything that was quite a memorable way to go! Much better then succumbing to da sickness in some forgotten tunnel...

[Dark Lord holds action. Unleashes plague bolter at long range, about 15 meters, and goes for the called shot against Snazzkrump. He hits (Snazz diverts his remaining shock to wounds and he ends up with 4 shock and only 2 wounds.]

[Snazz attempts to ram before diving out of the vehicle. He spends a wrath point to overcome the poison, but Snazz still fails the ram test as rhe space marine is too darn fast. The stick bomb destroys the vehicle but...just like 40K the rule is it takes a 6 on a D6 to cause an explosion. It doesn't happen. However...the stikkbomb detonates right where the DarkLord is...but it doesn't do enough damage. 13 damage and this guy is Resilience 14!]


[Then I spend 1 ruin to seize the initiative, The Dark Lord hits Snazz again with the plague belcher and deals another 5 wounds. This means Snazz is knocked down prone and "Dying." He takes a memorable injury, torn ear again, which turns into a nagging wound. We can say the chest is infected again. Yay. But...he's ok for now. It's nothing he can't recover from if he doesn't take any more damage]

The Dark Lord waits patiently until the Snazz wagon comes into range, then carefully aims his plague belcher right at the driver. Unlike the raging mutant spawn, the Dark Lord exercises careful discipline and restraint as he squeezes the trigger, releasing a salvo of deadly plague and filth.

The plague bolts slam right into Snazzkrump covering him in filth and temporarily blinding him, just as he tries to dive out of the vehicle and slam it into the Dark Lord.

Boom, the stikk bomb goes off just as the Snazz wagon supposedly slams into the Dark Lord and for a moment, you think you've won. The now wrecked snazzwagon grinds to a halt and all is covered in smoke.

But when the smoke clears, the Dark Lord emerges apparently unscathed.

Before anyone can react he unleashes another barrage of plague bolts which finally put him down.

The DarkLord is just 10 meters away from the wounded Snazzkrump now.

Meanwhile, Grotskorcha is about 27 meters from the Dark Lord and 19 meters from Snazzkrump. He heard voices behind him. Bellowing ork voices.

"Oi, wot happened to my snazz wagon!" It definitely sounds like Big Toof.


But Grotskorcha gets the sense that if he waits for the other orks to arrive the Dark Lord will escape. Even worse...Snazz might get krumped himself.

Meanwhile...Snazz may have one more opportunity to raise his slugga and take a shot at the Dark Lord. Doing so might risk additional injury and even death. On the other hand...if he just plays dead, maybe he can survive this.

[NEW ROUND. DARK LORD REGAINS 1 RUIN.]

[SAME ORDER, ONE OF YOU GO, THEN THE DARK LORD, THEN THE OTHER ONE OF YOUZ]

[GROTSKORCHA...YOU CAN SPEND A WRATH TO REGAIN A POINT OF SHOCK AND RECOVER FROM EXHAUSTION. THIS WOULD THEN LET YOU SPRINT AND FLAME OUT WITH YOUR SKORCHA AS IT IS AN ASSAULT WEAPON. DN WILL BE 9 THOUGH AS IT WOULD BE A MULTI-ACTION +LONG RANGE+INJURY PENALTY+DARK LORD HAS DEFENSE OF 4. YOU COULD GET AN EXTRA D6 by using salvo and you could re-roll all fails up to one time because you have 1 wrath points]

[Or GROTSKORCHA CAN WAIT FOR REINFORCEMENTS]

[SNAZZKRUMP CAN TRY TO FIRE HIS SLUGGA, DOING SO RISKS ADDITIONAL INJURY THOUGH. HE COULD ALSO USE HIS CUNNIN TO TRY AND PLAY DEAD]