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The dragonguard took flight fleeting high above the masses below. Namora searched the skies ever vigilant for her long lost dear brother Abraxas. The Bloodthirsters took flight from their rocky pyre beating their wings high above lost in the blood red sky.

"Namora my sister I am here right beside you. Day after day there is a ghost of a chance. I can't let go. Keep your eyes wide open. Like a circle of light I can't let you go. It follows me blindly day after day. The voice deep inside... The voice deep inside you. You know me, I'm still the same. I am everything you've ever broken. The voice is still deep inside me, I'm inside you under your skin. My heart still beats but I am not the same. I just can't let you go."

The Everqueen shock her head. "Abraxas you've come back and I still love my once gentle brother! You've come back to find me. My heart still beats for you too! I've kept my eyes wide open. Please don't let go now. I'll follow you blindly!"

"My heart still beats. Like a circle of light and I just can't let go. Together we shall take down Angron."


"Day after day my dearest brother. There's still a ghost of a chance."

Pros:

1) At times the writing is gorgeous, and your stories are well-written, to be sure.
2)There is nothing technical in the writing that distracts the reader.
3) Your style is descriptive and quickly draws the reader in, no clever or contrived plot devices necessary.
4) That random Bloodthirster was a hoot, for sure, adding an appropriate level of comic relief.

Cons (and since you wanted an explaination, I'll give you one for each)

1) I guess that I don't particularly like a main character who can more or less inflict his will on the plot of the story without anyone at all being able to stop him. He's chewed through two SM Companies, the Avatar of Khaine, the Solitare, the random Genestealers (still not sure what they were doing there, surrounded by Eldar and SMs). He's successfully deceived a Chaos God of his intent (albeit not the brightest or tricksiest one). There you go - it's boring knowing that a) he has no internal conflict, b) he doesn't really have any external conflict with characters (whom he just steamrolls with little to no help, pure and simple), and he has c) no conflict with his environment.
2) The "hero" has done no cost-benefit analysis. How much damage has he done to the galaxy in the name of killing off one daemon? Sure, he'll get one drop of blood from his stone in the end, but despite his arguably advanced age, he doesn't seem to have much in the way of critical thinking skills. Heck, he already seems more powerful than Angron, so why not just end his foe?
3) My opinion on him aside, I think the part on the Craftworld served no real purpose other than to once again reassert how great he is (I already had figured it out from the first SM chapter) and to get his name and true race out of the last being left alive. Then again, I'm sort of a thinkin' man, and I'm sure there are plenty of people who would enjoy reading a story about a daemon wandering around slaughtering. I'd prefer if he had a bit more depth, as he is somewhat of a 1.5dimensional hero at this point IMHO.

Hope this helps. I am quite interested to see the end, and that's really what matters.

Well I really appreciate the feedback a lot. If you remember his battle with the Salamander terminators he could not just charge in and destroy them at will. In fact he had to keep out of their charge range at times... It was supposed to be a bit of cat and mouse. His power grows over the course of the story and it has reached a climax. I don't want to give anything away so I'm not going to say anything about the end. If you have read Blood for the Blood God which served as the inspiration for this story you'll find that the Skulltaker in that novel is pretty much unstoppable. This Skulltaker did have his hands full with the Avatar and only won through sheer will in the end, at least that is how I meant it to come across.

Some people have asked me the following:

what was his origin? How did he come to be trapped as an ember in the beginning of the story and what happened after he killed the replicant Captain Agrozz?

What are the replicant Marines and what role do they play in the story?

If I can manage to keep writing enough it will all be revealed.

Again the feedback is greatly appreciated.

G

The Skulltaker suddenly appeared to the right of Namora beating his great wings which kept the daemon prince aloft and moving at great speed. He carried a long great aex with twin blades and a long metal tail skunk out from behind him whipping the air. The Skulltaker wore a bronze helmet that covered his huge head and two sharp horns sprouted out from the fore. His eyes were bright red orbs that shone like a pair of stars deep in the night.

"Oh how low you have fallen my brother!" Namora could not help but cry out at the sudden shock of finally seeing her long lost brother after all the years of separation.

"It is my path to follow and I have followed it to the end. To me it has always been a level journey with each step forward. Your kinsmen denied me my right at the head of your kingdom. Now they will finally pay for their treachery with blood and skulls.

"In truth I am still just as much an eldar as you or anyone else from our tribe, but I have also become something more. I worship at the altar of Khaine. I have no fear or compulsion not to murder in his name. Our kinsmen you can blame if you find me debased, disgusting and fallen. Of all I have ever known you were always the one to see through all the deceit and lies to find the simple truth that cowards and tyrants wish to hide. Our brother Diamocles is a liar as well. I know you love him best as you chose to follow him, not me. Know this though! I was the firstborn not Diamocles and I stood within the burning flames of the secret temple unharmed. Hate is in my heart and it has made me invulnerable. I have no weakness and even my love for you shall change nothing here today.

"Now we shall do what we must and that will be the end of it once and for all. All the cards have been played and this is the final hand. You can see yonder the great and mighty Angron making his way towards us now. He is accompanied by his vast retinue of loyal Bloodthirsters. Only Angrath is my companion. Angron means to kill us all and be done with it. All below us are doomed. There is nothing you can do to save them now. So we shall fight together this one last time. How fickle fate truly is to bring us back together now as such." With that the Skulltaker dropped down from the sky speeding towards Angron and his Bloodthirsters.

The dragon riders of Pernth came from the left of Namora. Their dragons pulled back in the air and unleashed sizzling hot gouts of flame broiling into Angron and his small horde. The daemons were encased in the flames and seemed to lose their sense of direction for a moment. From above the dragon riders of the Ridden Wyrm dropped down in a quick swoop. Their dragons uncoiled their vast clawed feet grasping hold of some of the greater daemons throwing them down away from the center of the horde. Angron bellowed loudly grabbing one dragon by it's long tail and ripped it loose from the skies above. From the right another group of dragon riders entered the fray. Each dragon carried on eldar steering the mount while there was also another firing great bolt throwers into the Bloodthirsters. The bolts sang out quickly piercing the brass armor and skewering the closest of the greater daemons. Some of the Bloodthirsters lost or had a wing crippled and they fell from the skies like plunging meteors. Angron bellowed again rushing towards these dragons realizing they were the biggest threat yet. His horde followed behind slashing their axes through the cold air.

The Skulltaker held out the end of his aex handle sighting it on Angron. A long steely barb shot out and sank into the daemon primarch's shoulder. Angron roared with rage turning his attention on Abraxas. "You are a traitor! Khorne summoned me to your aid and I come here to find you fighting with the eldar! You have finally shown your true color at last!"

"Angron you have forever been dull in mind." said Abraxas. "You cannot even begin to fathom what is taking place. I would never take aid from you for you are one that would sink your axe in my back if you thought you had half the chance. You are nothing more than a petty mortal whom by sheer luck rose to the status of an immortal. Khorne had no choice but to take you to his side, it was simple fate and nothing else. You have butchered many of your own for no good reason. Remember that the god of murder does not care whose blood is split as long as it flows deep. I make my own fate while you are but a tool."

Angron bellowed again pulling the sharp steel barb from his wounded shoulder. "I will grind your bones Skulltaker and wipe that smile off your face!"

The Skulltaker's long prehensile armor covered tail shot out like a snaking serpent wrapping tight around Angron's throat. Abraxas yanked hard and drove the speared tip end of his great aex deep into Angron's muscled stomach. The primarch reached out and grabbed the Skulltaker with both his giant fists. They both hung in the air beating their wings wrestling with each other. A dragon came in from behind Angron tearing at the primarch's wings. Abraxas shifted his weight pushing the haft of his aex up into Angron's throat, then he stopped beating his wings. The primarch could not keep them both aloft and as a pair they began to plunge down from the red skies.

The two monsters collided into the earth. A great explosion boomed and large cloud of red dirt sprayed up covering their impact. There was a huge crater from where they had crashed with dead bodies of eldar sprawled all about from the deadly impact. The Skulltaker lay on top of Angron, one head of his great aex deeply embedded in his own chest and the other head cleanly punched through the the primarch's. Abraxas rolled off Angron, dark red blood seeping out from his split lips. His vision was cloudy as the Skulltaker slowly pulled himself hand over hand crawling out from the crater with his aex still lodged in his chest. Angron was out stone cold not moving at all. Legion upon teeming legion stood around the skirt of the huge crater silently watching as the Skulltaker continued to pull himself up. Both his legs were broke in several places and bright clean pieces of bone shard stuck out of his skewered skin and tended armor. "Go forth now and kill them off! There is little time left." whispered Abraxas hoarsely. The Bloodletters continued to watch then one by one the daemons started to descend down into the pit grasping hold of their champion, pulling with all their might to lift him out from the crater. Abraxas let his head drop to the side, his long forked tongue stuck out from his mouth as he gasped and spit up frothing blood

Finally the Bloodletters managed to pull him free and right him on the edge with his broken legs dangling down below. He flapped his wings a few times and found they had not been damaged by the great fall but the effort hurt immensely. Looking down the Skulltaker could see Angron still lay at the bottom of the pit still unmoving. The primarch's wings were both broken falling over limply on both sides.

"The Everqueen and her retinue are coming. Open up a clearing for them and do not attack unless I command you to do so." said the Skulltaker.

A great shadow passed over the deamonic brood as the Bloodletters stepped back. One by one the last of the dragons settled upon the blood soaked soil. At the front landed the ancient dragon Namora had chosen as her mount. The eldar looked around fearfully taking in the vast masses of daemons that surrounded them. The Everqueen dismounted stepping down slowly walking towards her fiendish brother. She lowered her sceptre and stood still.

"I hold the sword of Khaine." said Abraxas. "It was forged in the ninth pit of hell while the ancient godsmith hammered it out upon an iron forge. The metal comes from beyond our material and was folded over so many times that the fractal patterns the cover its surface are microscopic and infinitesmally hidden. This ore holds no bound daemon but has soaked up the blood and life force of millions upon millions of sacrifices. It is a thing of hate and to wield it is said to bring a curse so great that anyone half sane would be to frightened to grasp it. Not even the god Khorne would use it but he gave it to me presented as a gift. Who is to say what will be my fate for carrying this cursed blade? None can say. It is an artefact of unlimited power so great as to corrupt anyone or anything that would dare lift it up to strike out in battle." the Skulltaker held the hilt of the sword in both hands and lifted it above his head. The dark blade hummed so loud it filled the air with a sound like 1000 Banshees crying out. Abraxas cut into the very fabric of time and space opening up a void. A black hole split open and from the void there came a bright blue light that shone down upon the red earth. "Namora I give you this one opportunity to flee this realm. I have opened a doorway to another universe to which you and the last of your kinsmen may escape. I cannot tell you what is on the other side but mayhaps it is a fate less worse than the one that awaits you here. I bid you to leave this mortal coil and begone."

Namora was silent as she stared into the very depths of the void before her. "So be it then. We shall depart from this universe." With that she remounted her dragon and flew into the gaping maw before her. The last of the dragon riders followed her into the void just it began to close.


Some time passed and finally the daemon primarch came to again. His giant form stirred back to life as the great daemon lifted himself up from the bottom of the crater. Angron stood up looking out. The Skulltaker stood above with a hand extended into the pit. Angron sneered as he made his up the tilted slope and climbed out. "What has happened here?"

"The eldar are finished to the very last as was demanded by our lord Khorne. We have brought about the demise of an entire race." said the Skulltaker.

Angron sniffed the cool night air. "All I can smell are the dead. It would seem what you say is true but I will scour every inch of this planet before I accept your word as the truth!"

"Go ahead then Angron. I won't try to stop you. Take a thousand flesh hounds and search until the ends of this world. You'll see for yourself." said the Skulltaker.

time moves on... The Skulltaker has successfully eliminated the most hated race in the universe while at the same time saving his sister's life. Time moves on until the end of time... Chaos fights to survive...

"My dear sister I still think of you every day. So much time has passed since the last time I saw you. I wonder if you still remember me. I feel under my skin. My heart still beats like a circle of life out of control day after day." thought Abraxas. He sat upon his throne mounted on a mountain of skulls. "Day after day." The daemon placed his hand upon the hilt of his sword. "I long to leave this place and be by your side again. I shall never forget you my dear sister."

The lith female daemon Shardona looked up at Abraxas smiling "We all wonder why you sit there upon your High throne brooding." Bright red flames flickered in her eyes. "The super Colussi are here now. You still command one million million daemonkin! Break this funk and lead us to battle! It's time to take another skull in the name of our god!"

Abraxas looked down upon the female daemon, his great eyes hooded and his mouth curled in a frown. "Who sent you Shardona? Time is at an end now. The super Colussi signal the final time. Entropy reigns supreme."

"You will sit here and just watch the very universe torn asunder? There is a foe worthy of you! I beseech you to lead us into battle once more."

"Learn to say goodbye."

Expect more soon!



G

The Skulltaker stared into the shallow red pool watching the dark images play about in the shrouded mist. An eye opened deep within the pool and stared back then blinked.

"Here is the gate leading to the world where your sister Namora lives. All you have to do is step through the mist." said the stony voice.

Abraxas laughed. "Yet another ploy by the dead god Tzneetch to pull the wool over my eyes." The Skulltaker tugged absently on the huge brass collar fitted tightly around his muscular neck. "No sorcery in this world or any other can deceive me warp creature. Go and find yourself another fool to listen to your lies."

The voice spoke again "What I say is true. I am a meme sent by your sister to seek you out and lead you back to her. I can do you no harm just as you have said yourself. Give peace a chance."

Abraxas frowned hard then lifted up a huge skull throwing it into the center of the pool. The hidden images broke and disappeared as the red mist rolled back in place covering the illusion. Standing up and lifting himself from the side of the small pool the Skulltaker patted the huge pair of automated pistols in their leather holsters then checked to make sure his sword was still resting in the scabbard slung across his armored back. Next Abraxas reached down picking up his long mega rifle. A cold wind started to blow across the open plains and large chunks of broken hail fell down from the heavens above. The Skulltaker lifted up his hunting horn and blew upon the small lip. The horn boomed. "Super Colossi I am here! You say that you have finally hunted me down but in truth I have hunted you! Here I shall make my final stand and rid this galaxy of your taint or die trying. I am immortal and a true son of Khaine, the bloody handed God of murder. I am invulnerable. All who stand before shall fall! Your mishapen skulls shall rest upon my mountain of death! Come forth and prepare to die now!" shouted the Skulltaker.

The fog swirled maddeningly upon the hardened plains. Large boulders lay strewn about the valley tossed about like small stones. Hard black ice covered the rocky earth below. Suddenly there was quaking and the boulders began to roll. The steps of walking giants filled the freezing air. Looking up the Skulltaker watched silently as three enormous beings clad in black armor marched out from the fog. Each giant carried both a huge double headed axe and a long throwing spear. Their shadows eclisped the moons above.

"We have come to answer your call daemon." said the central giant. "I am Strider." The Titan lifted up his spear pointing towards his left. "This is Bender." Next he pointed towards his right. "And this is Forge.

"Long have we hunted you and there is no place left for you to run. The Daemon sword you carry shall be our prize after we grind down your bones to dust. Your immortality and invulnerability mean nothing to us for we are from a different place. Together we three have defeated many much more powerful than yourself. You are nothing to us." Strider's voice was deep and thundered as he spoke.

"So we shall see." Abraxas challenged back as he lowered his mega rifle training the barrel upon Strider's great helmeted head. "It was divined long ago that a race of giant cyclops would come in the end." Then the Skulltaker gently squeezed the trigger firing off a vortex tipped shell. "I shall see if you are truly what you say you are." The bolt spun about arcing slowly towards the giant's head. Strider lifted his axe to parry the shot but the tiny rocket drifted above his enormous reach then curved back down striking the Titan in his eye socket. There was a great explosion.

The vortex tipped shell imploded into the giant's helmet gouging a deep hole into the solitary eye slit. The helmet glowered around the point of impact as shards of black armor peeled away burning like large embers. Strider yelled so loud it sounded like a hundred claps of thunder simultaneously discharging. The giant dropped his axe and ripped off his helm exposing a cruel face. His single eye was a cloudy red orb that burned with hate. Row upon row of sharp jagged teeth filled his mouth. His skin was mottled and dark grey covered in a complex pattern of swirling scars that criss crossed his bare skull. Strider lifted up his wrecked helmet and flung it at the Skulltaker. It rolled end over end as it sailed through the fog. Abraxas leapt aside at the last moment just avoiding the impact. The helmet crashed into the rocky soil digging a huge gaping crater into the frozen wasteland.

Gripping the mega rifle with both hands the daemon squeezed off three more shots that barked as the broke out from the clipped muzzle. The three shots split apart rolling along separate arcs towards the giant. They slowly rolled about as tracer fire screamed off their tails. One took a direct course straight at Strider while the other two hooked in from right to left. The giant quickly took a step back dropping out of sight as the fog closed in. The miniature rockets punched through the vapor and disappeared, sucked into the abyss. Abraxas stood still listening and then a trio of explosions sounded. As each rocket struck the titan it's armored body lit up through the mists as if hit by lightning. The sound of Strider screaming filled the night then the giant toppled over.

So intent was the Skulltaker watching the fall that he had failed to notice Bender and Forge swiftly flanking upon him from either side. One Titan hurled his spear while the other was uncoiling a long spike whip from it's waist.

+++
Vivid memories quickly played back through Abraxas' mind. He remembered the ancient world of his true origin with two moons hunting with the most powerful and bitter sorceror his race had ever known. The sorceror's name was on the tip of his tongue but it had been so long ago. Next came back the memories of slipping through an extra dimensional warp that carried him to a parallel future world. His new kin were at the very height of their vast power but had succumbed to to their over excited powers giving rise to a new and terrible god. Abraxas had seen the great fall coming and hated the new god with every fiber of his being. He also despised the radicals of his new kin. To Abraxas they were penultimate hypocrites and over the vast track of time this proved to be the truth. He turned his back on them all taking up worship of the Blood God. Lord Khorne looked down upon him and chose Abraxas as one of his many champions to take skulls in his name. His life changed that day and became ever more dark which he fully embraced. Slowly he rose in power and was finally chosen as the Skulltaker, Khorne's most personal herald. Long ago he had lost count of how many skulls he had taken. The enemies' blood flow like a raging sea during the darkest storm. More power with each kill. His hatred was unbound.

+++
The crack of the Titan's whip brought the Skulltaker back to the immediate. Abraxas spun through the air as he cartwheeled above the sharp lash landing upright upon a single stark boulder. "Blood for the Blood God!" shouted Abraxas as he spun in place lifting up his mega rifle.

"Your meme said give peace a chance!" shouted the Skulltaker at Forge then he laughed cruelly. His long sharp fangs sparkled under the moonlight as he licked his lips. "To be honest I'm surprised you did not come to try and enslave me."

The Titan looked down at the daemon and stopped for a moment.

"I know more about you than you know about me! There are traitors amongst your rank." said Abraxas as the cold winds began to howl. "There is not secret you can hide from me. Those who sent you know may fail." The Skulltaker lifted up his rifle aiming at the Titan's hip. "Your own kind has betrayed you in fear of my brand of retribution!" Abraxas repeatedly pulled hard on the trigger emptying the last clip of the mega rifle. There was no room for the giant to dodge away as the rockets exploded into it's hip cutting the Titan in twain.

"Yes there are traitors amongst your rank!" shouted Abraxas. "First I will flay your bones then they will taste my own personal brand of justice."

Bender's voice boomed like a cannon "You are a traitor to your own kind daemon spawn. You are demented and nothing more than a base killer. Your every thought is centered around your next kill. Nothing else matters to you."

The Skulltaker sniffed the air. Something dark and twisted was rapidly approaching from both sides. His eyes glowed bright red as Abraxas stared into the void surrounding him. The last Titan towered over him ready to strike. Suddenly from the left and right came two packs of large beasts. They charged in loping over the frozen earth as their long pointed claws tore into the stone underneath. Quickly the Skulltaker reached for his two pistols pulling them from their stiff braces. Just as the first creature was ready to strike Abraxas squeezed a trigger blasting it's head apart. The beast's body collided into the daemon knocking him down. More of the beasts assaulted sinking their stinking jagged fangs into his armor. The Skulltaker stuck the barrel of one pistol deep into the maw of the beast sitting upon his chest and fired another round exploding the creature into blazing bits of rended flesh and sundered bone. Another beast sunk it's jaws around his arm savagely pulling his right gun away. Abraxas rolled underneath and fired his other pistol knocking the creature away with the muzzle flash. There were too many and they all fought each other to rip apart his armor. Abraxas felt his limbs pinned down by their sheer weight of numbers. The Skulltaker could feel the intense pressure of their huge jaws tearing at him. Still his armor held and slowly the daemon righted himself lifting his body back up as he fought against the beasts. Dropping either pistol Abraxas reached for the Sword of Khaine grasping the cursed blade by the long hilt with both hands and wrenched it free from it's red lacquered sheath. The sword blazed to life as it came free and the Skulltaker savagely swung his weapon about cleaving the closest creatures in twain. The beasts continued to charge in but the daemon had cleared a small circle of death around him. The black sword sang as it struck down repeatedly cutting through more and more of the large beasts.

Bender looked down as he stomped. The Skulltaker leapt aside and landed upon another boulder. The skulls of the dead beasts gnashed their teeth together chomping off the forked ends of their rough tongues. Abraxas looked up and spat. Again the Titan stomped. The daemon jumped off of the boulder firing both his pistols in Bender's giant armored boot. The bullets drilled through the Titan's black armor smoking as they screwed in deep. Bender cursed out loud when he felt the hot vortex tipped shells rip through his flesh and bone. In anger the Titan lashed out with his long steely whip knocking the Skulltaker aside. The whip tore through the daemon's armor cutting his hardened flesh. Dark red blood flowed out from the deep long gash. Again Bender snapped his whip sending the Skulltaker flying through the cold night air. Abraxas collided into another boulder and dropped his spent pistols. The daemon looked down at his wound. Already the flesh had begun to re-knit itself and the rent in his armor closed in upon itself.

The Titan stepped back as Abraxas climbed to his feet. He could hear the sound of many metal shod hooves clambering down upon the rocky soil. Tall armored shapes filled the air as the army of warriors closed in. Abraxas drew the Sword of Khaine snarling with bestial rage. His nostrils flared.

"Come to me." said the Skulltaker as he charged into the masses swinging his sword from left to right in a long swooping arc. The blade cut through the warriors laying waste. Abraxas screamed in pure unbridled rage. His hate filled the night air as the heat from the sword blazed like wildfire. Warriors combusted instantly burned to ash and the hot wind blew them down like dust. The Skulltaker moved so fast that the daemon became nothing more than just a blur. Everywhere the enemy collapsed upon themselves as Abraxas cut through them. The Titan stepped back on his wounded foot watching intently trying unsuccessfully to keep track of the Skulltaker. Suddenly the great Titan felt a burst of intense pain as the Sword of Khaine lanced through his neck. The Skulltaker had launched himself high into the darkness landing astride upon Bender's left shoulder stabbing his sword deep into the Titan's throat. The blade burned as it cut through Bender's vocal cords. The Titan faltered then tumbled down smashing into the ranks of the warriors surrounding him. Abraxas jumped off climbing up a huge boulder. The daemon held his sword above his head as the blade began to shriek. The sound of the sword was extremely high pitched and completely deafening. The last of the warriors covered their ears and kneeled down together. The pitch of the sword continued to intensify. The very ground trembled and quaked as the rocks vibrated and began to roll. A zenith opened and quickly the Skulltaker threw down his weapon leaping through the opening. The zenith immediately closed in upon itself and the daemon vanished forever gone from this mortal coil. Then there was silence and the air grew frigid again.

This concludes the first part of the story. I hope you have enjoyed it. I thank those who offered constructive criticism.... others like Fetterkey just come across as having a stick up their arse. I am now working on the second part of the story over on the WC forums under the title Last Man Standing.

Okay, so i just read it all and i must say i did enjoy it. I mean it kept me up for like an extra 3 hours. However i did prefer the first 2 pages, as i sort of got confused. So what happened to all the eldar on that craftworld? When is this set? Whats all this with titans. One thing that i think could really help is if at the start of your time changes you set the scene a little bit so we knew whats going down, as i don't know where or what the skulltaker was fighting in, is it the immaterium or in the eye of terror. I think that you sort of left the 40k universe behind and thats when i felt your writing style improve but it meant there was no scene for the fights and stuff to be based upon. If you get what i mean?

Dannijt wrote:
So what happened to all the eldar on that craftworld?

The eldar on that craftworld were all killed as the end of their race is the Skulltaker's primary mission at that point in the story.

When is this set?

The story begins in the present 40k time reference and moves forward. The end of the story takes place 10s of 1000 of years beyond the beginning.

Whats all this with titans.

They are called Titans but don't confuse them with the Imperial war machines. These Titans are giants that came from another galaxy to kill the Skulltaker.

One thing that i think could really help is if at the start of your time changes you set the scene a little bit so we knew whats going down, as i don't know where or what the skulltaker was fighting in, is it the immaterium or in the eye of terror.

Thank you for the advice! : )

G

If you like the story it continues on over at:

40kwreckingcrew.aceboard.com

Go to the bottom forum and look for the thread entitled Last Man Standing.

G

So I am ready now to write the final chapter! More coming very soon.

G

The End of Time
Time has progressed far into the future. All life within the universe has come to an end except for Abraxas. Lord Khorne slowly withered away after the last of his worshippers ceased to exist. The Skulltaker, being able to draw substance in the form of love from his sister Namora, continued on and took over the role as the one true God of Khorne. Abraxas consumed the last of his daemons to harbor their warp powers and still holds claim on the dark Sword of Khaine. There is no thermal energy left within the universe. All matter left slowly clumped together over the aeons of time forming a long chain of super heavy matter known as the Garden of Oblivion. This vast chain of super heavy matter and the Skulltaker are all that is left that still exists. Abraxas most often chooses to reside within warp space bidding his time at the Palace of the Skull God. The walls are endlessly covered with the polished skulls of those he killed in battle. Most often he sits upon the Skull Throne lost in endless meditation. Finally he is taken by a vision. The Skull God must journey to the Garden of Oblivion and destroy it. The vast chains of super heavy matter are tied to a dark center and at the black heart of this conglomeration there lies an entrance to the very center of all the multiverses. Some great and eternal being resides there and has corrupted everything everywhere over the course of a million milion aeons. The threads from every universe are tangled there and the slow rot of mindless death has reached out claiming all and everything. Only the Skulltaker can cut the tangled strands of fate and start time moving forward again. To do so the Skulltaker must reach the Garden of Oblivion and face the unknown in battle. Drawing upon the unbound power of his Sword of Khaine Abraxas leaves the Palace of Skulls to re-enter real time and space. Before the daemon god floats the inner domain. He must first pass through the Barrier of Total Death to set foot on the Garden of Oblivion. A great black void blankets the Garden an abyss.

My biggest complaint is your sig. Normally large sigs are a minor annoyance double the annoyance for sigs with pics but in page 3 it was more often then not longer then your entry.

That being said I liked this, it got a bit long winded at times and it felt like it was battle battle battle with no story but that isn't really a story killer for some reason.

The Skulltaker waited as his corpereal form began to take shape in real space. Slowly his huge body solidified upon the rocky outcrop overlooking the vast void separating the daemon god from the Garden of Oblivion. Abraxas stood up covered from head to toe in a suit of the finest armor any warrior of the Blood God had worn to battle. Glowing runes of power and destruction were intricately carved into the plate armor pulsing with a life of their own. Huge rivets had been hammered into the brass covered plates fastening them together. The plate armor swirled about like dragon scales as Abraxas stepped up to the lip of the outcrop. He wore a full helmet shaped like a skull with two large eyelets so he could look forth unencumbered. His large eyes blazed bright red like orbs of crimson death from above. A pair of long pointed horns curled out from the forehead of the helmet pointing straight up. In one guantlet Abraxas held a large mace terminated at the end with a wicked cudgel bearing row upon row of sharp pointed spikes that stuck out. Each spike was serrated with smaller prickly bits that could tear through the toughest armor. In his other gauntlet the daemon god held a long black sword with razorsharp double edges. Upon his wide heavily muscled back the ancient Sword of Khaine was fastened tightly in it's long black lacquered sheath. Sparkling red rubbies were encrusted along the sheath and they blazed even in the complete absence of light. A pair of twin dueling blades with long thick hilts finely crafted from the skin of dead enemies sat upon his metallic belt. He also carried a pair of megabolters, each grip jutting out from the twin holsters strapped tightly under his armpits. Both gigantic auto pistol was loaded with doubled magazines carrying his last rounds of Vortex tipped bolts.

Abraxas looked across the abyss and roared a battlecry into the void "Blood for the Blood God! More skulls for the Skull Throne! Oh Tee Waaaa!!!"

The void answered back with silence engulfing the daemon god's battlecry.

Abraxas lifted the faceplate on his helmet and sniffed. Even within the the utter cold of empty space the daemon's nostrils detected a faint hint of something purely evil. His skin prickled under his warp forged armor and he felt a quick shiver run up his spine. Something here was wrong, very wrong. There were no skulls or blood to be taken in his name. For once in his life he could not help but question himself. All the millions and millions of battles had been fought long long ago. Abraxas lifted his long sword up running his his forked tongue along the sharp fractal edge. The daemon god could taste the ancient blood trapped when the folded metal. His skin hardened as he exhaled, small whiffs of crimson vapor rolled off his grinning leer.

Abraxas stepped up to the edge of the outcrop lifting his arms out wide embracing the void. To cross the gulf lead to the garden but to fail meant death even for the last god. His body and mind would die while in the abyss but life and power would return after passing through. The void was a maze of death. Abraxas had studied ever tome ever written about the passing over and over and it was all thoroughly memorized. His suit of armor had been programmed with sigils of arcane power to execute the thirteen steps required to cross through the void. Each step must be perfectly placed or else the sentinel would fail, die an eternal death and be forever committed to the vast prison that had trapped the infinite multiverse. Abraxas breathed in one last time then stepped off into the void. As the daemon god entered into the black void Abraxas could feel all his vast power begin to drain away. Icy knives of dark ether cut into his very being leeching away his essence. Then there was nothing. Abraxas ceased to exist, his body and mind completely inert. The suit of armor began to glow as the first sigil blazed into being. The left boot landed upon a floating chunk of glassy black rock then pushed off thrusting the dead body of the daemon god further into the cold embrace of the waiting death. As the first rune dimmed then blinked out the second sigil glowed bright red. The right boot lifted up kicking against a hard wall of stone spinning the dead body around. As the second rune died the third sigil came online. The long armored arms of the armored suit reached up spreading the huge pair of cybernetic wings then pulling down to catapult the dead warrior across an opening within the twisting myriad of guarded giant boulders. The suit of armor went stiff taking on the shape of a spear. The third rune died away just as the fourth sigil started to glow an eerie green. Once again the long arms shot out pushing the pair of wings out into space. Abraxas' dead body continued to soar through the void narrowly missing a collecting ring of bristling stalactites.
The fourth rune dimmed breaking off the left shoulderguard just as the sixth sigil blazed to life. The suit of armor righted itself as both boots dropped down planting the thick metal soles against the top of a descending rock. It's shoulders slumped and the helmet slumped down against the wide chestplate. Time passed as the free chunk of rock silently slipped through the voidstream. The sixth rune fell from the armor and the seventh sigil started to vibrate. Bending over the suit of armor flexed it's long legs pushing off from the top spiralling out above the second ring. The sixth rune dissolved into a pile of bitter ash spilling away into the emptiness as the seventh sigil was awoken. The left arm lifted up casting the double edged sword out like a missile. Striking a column of high stone the tip of the sword bit into a deep crack splitting the barrier in twain. Leaping through the opening the suit of armor carried through the sudden split before the column could close again. The seventh rune fell away as both the eighth and ninth runes blazed together casting a sheen of deep strobing crimson warpfire around the armor. Stinging nettles of icy cold vapors spilled out from the third ring coating the floating rock with slippery ice. The warpfire burst into flame melting away the ice. The left arm reached out as the gauntlet grasped at the hilt of the rebounding sword. Fumbling for the grip the fingers caught hold pulling the weapon back in again. One after another the eighth and ninth runes died turning black as the last of the energy was spent. The suit of armor stood still waiting for the tenth sigil to turn on.

The tenth sigil ignited upon the faceplate of the Skulltaker's helmet casting a series of swirling lines that drifted across the mask. His eyes were dead and shut closed but the glow from the sigil filled the two large eyelets with a bright green shade that slowly pulsed. The suit of warp forged armor drew it's knees high as the brass paldrons came together. Pushing off from the tumbling rock with it's legs the suit of armor leaped high catapulting up towards the inner boundary of the third ring. Both armored boots came down hard landing on top of another huge rock cyclindrical in shape. The thin veneer of stone began to crack and fracture as the tenth rune dissolved. The dead body of the daemon God was still slumped inside it's armor. Before the eleventh signal could activate the thin stone broke apart like ice and the dead God collasped through the rent falling into the seething pit of darkness below. Within the cyclinder lay a deep pool of caustic acid which began to eat away at the plates of interlocking armor. Wisps of black smoke drifted up from the burning armor spilling out into the cold embrace of the abyss. Suddenly the eleventh sigil started to glow a bright red filling the bottom of the deadly tank with a thin sheen of red mist. Both armored boots had been fitted with sharp pointed steel horns at the toe. One after the other each boot lifted up kicking their spikes deep into the round wall enclosing Abraxas. The acid sluiced through to cracks eating away at the inner wall of hardened rock. A pair of small liquid jets spilled out from the pinpoint cracks driving the cyclinder forwards and slowly tipping it over. The death mosque drifted forward towards the boundary of the third ring as the acid spilled out from the opening at the top. Swarms of smaller chunks of rock collided into the cyclinder further cracking against it's outer layer. The Skulltaker laid dead inside as the eleventh rune winked out leaving the inner clutch of the death trap in utter blackness. Eventually the last of the acid leeched away as the cyclinder shot put past the third ring hovering on it's side floating towards the end of the void. The icy barbs of death then started to recede from within the Skulltaker.

-Edit due to double post-

The stone coffin was caught within a mindless eddy slowly drifting away from the end of the void then circling back in again. Each time the coffin passed through the outer boundary of the abyss the daemon god began to stir back alive then Abraxas would die again as the coffin was pulled back inside the void. The last of his armor's sigils had been burned away by the acid before they could activate... but the fifth sigil had been cast inside the suit of plated armor and had remained intact. The fifth sigil had been created as a contingency. Each time that life and power started to reform Abraxas would concentrate al his thoughts upon the last sigil willing it to ignite but each brief period of thought was not long enough to activate the fifth sigil. The coffin continued to drift back and forth across the eddy for an eternity, the daemon god forced to relive each dying moment of brief life over and over again. Abraxas lay upon the frozen stone tabulet trapped until the very end of time.

The Garden of Oblivion loomed just beyond the reach of the dead yet living daemon god's grasp. Raging cosmic gales blew across the void in perfect cadence rythmically stirring the little eddy which had caught the eerie stone sarchopgagus. Super gravity wells spewed up the cosmic storms boiling across the abyss. Aeon upon aeon passed one after another and nothing changed. The grand multiverse had died all tied together at a single point forming a dark nexus which bound everything. The Garden of Oblivion had remained unchallenged.

Then finally there came a small change, infinitesmal in comparison to all else. The stone coffin broke apart as it crossed the outer boundary of the abyss casting Lord Khorne beyond. Abraxas stirred to life again one final time his mind broken by the endless chain of life following death and then back alive again. The Skulltaker landed upon the edge of the Garden staring at the utter madness through his pair of insane eyes. His memories were all lost to him as he slowly trudged upon the Garden's grounds. Immense formations of super dense matter spiralled up reaching out like twisted sheaths of empty doom assailing the void. Abraxas howled casting his mace and double edged sword aside. His ruined armor creaked as the giant daemon stumbled about blindly through the wilderness. The Skulltaker sniffed at the vacuum taking in a thin scent of evil. It ignited an ancient bloodlust trapped deep within his the dark black core of his very soul. Seas of burning blood crashed upon shores of a billion skulls within his crazed mind. Blood for the Blood God came the whispered taunt from the Garden. The Giant charged about clutching at imaginary foes that surrounded him from all sides. He fought like a mad daemon raging through the open ground. The scent of evil drew him along like a shark to blood. Deeper and deeper Abraxas descended along the twisting path leading the mad god towards the nexus. Massive chains of the trapped multiverses screamed in pain as they twisted about one another tighter. Finally the Skulltaker came to the hidden entrance of the dark nexus. He stared into the darkness taking in all the evil radiating from the malignant focal point. Suddenly the sound of laughter spilled out. Something dark and twisted lay inside. Ducking his head down tight Abraxas entered the nexus...

A vast palace of shining marble lay within and at the very center floated a high throne mounted upon a rotating disc. Another god sat upon the throne and looked down upon the insane form of Abraxas. The floating god wore a scintillating robe of many bright colors. It's large head was shaped like that of a bird of prey, it's many eyes focusing upon the other. "Not that you can understand one word I say now but how ironic that the God named Khorne stands below bereft of mind, the utter fool. Yes how ironic." hissed the floating god. "You stand there nothing more than a crazed spawn of Chaos helpless before me, Lord Tzneetch!" it cackled. "I need but one item from you to complete my grand domain. I reign supreme now over everything, every single bit of matter and energy captured here in my garden. I am the Lord of Change and now I will finally have the means to recreate everything as I see fit. Nurgle is dead and gone as so is our fellow God the dark prince commonly referred to as Slaanesh. So there is only you and I left but of course you are a complete wreck as I had always planned. You stand down there before me a totally mindless spawn to do my bidding. For you see there is stil one place left untouched by by my infinite domain... Some of small piece of reality where you hid your one true love, your sister Namora to be exact." Again Lord Tzneetch cackled rubbing his feathery hands together. "You will show me how to access this sanctuary so that I can claim it and then my domain will be complete and I will begin anew, master of all things."

The sound of the name of his sister stirred up some image from his clouded mind forcing the Skulltaker to look up for a moment and take in the radiant form of his arch adversary. Abraxas frowned bringing his huge muscled arms by his sides. The Skulltaker had lost his pair of megabolters while rampaging through the Garden as well as his pair of dueling knives. Only the dread Sword of Khaine remained fastened to his broad back. His red eyes were pools of crimson madness, insane hatred blazed out from the smoldering orbs. Buried deep within the rage the image of his sister Namora lay still pristine. The Skulltaker looked back down upon the tiled floor and grunted.

"You must listen very carefully now to what I tell you that which you must do. If you can find it within yourself to to follow my direction then you will once again be reunited with your loved one, the only creature to ever love you in return. Open your mind to me so that I can see where you have hidden her! Cast aside all resistance! It's futile!"

The floating throne slowly descended upon the round disc touching down up the marbled floor. Lord Tzneetch store up towering above his high throne. He opened his robe and drew out a pouch filled with fine grains of pure white sand. Carefully pulling the binding strings apart Tzneetch overturned the pouch letting the contents spill out. Slowly the sand built up as it poured down taking on the form of a beautiful eldar maiden, then it came to lift singing an ancient song of the elder race. The sound of the tilting words calmed Abraxas and his mighty rage began to simmer. A few of his most precious memories came back to him as he began to remember again. His mind grew focused as he started to focus upon the fifth sigil hidden with his suit of ruined armor. The sigil glowed from within filling him with peace of mind. He kept his eyes cast down and grunted again playing the part of a mad spawn.

"If you want to be with your dear Namora again then do exactly as I say. If you help me then I can help you as well. A favor in return for this last bit of necessary information is all I need from you now and everything will be sorted just as I have so carefully planned. Cast down your psychic wards and open your mind to me." commanded Tzneetch.

Abraxas stepped towards the facsimile of his sister intently watching her and listening to her sing. The Skulltaker reached up with one gauntlet behind his head grasping for the hilt of the Sword of Khaine. His armored fingers locked tight around the grip squeezing it hard. Tzneetch watch intently saying nothing. Abraxas pulled the blade free from it's lacquered scabbard bringing the sword around en guarde. The supernatural power of the ancient weapon forged on the lowest pits of the warp seeped into his being bringing back his lost clarity. Again Abraxas grunted keeping his shoulders slumped over as if it in despair. Khorne spoke quietly as if in subservience to his new master. "The Sword can cut through the very fabric of reality and open a portal to any place in time. This is how I freed my sister and kinsmen. Now you ask me to reopen the portal leading to where I placed her so long ago. It's a secret place looked deep within the last vestiges of my mind. To do so I will need complete recall of my mental facilities." Abraxas looked up thoughtfully at Tzneetch. "You are just going to have to trust me on this one."

Tzneetch looked down upon the Skulltaker. "So be it then." said the ultimate Lord of Change. It's birdlike beak turned up forming into a grin. Many rows of razorsharp teeth lined the inside of the bill and they flashed in the bright light trapped within the Garden palace. "So be it then!"

Abraxas placed the tip of his sword against the marble tiles of the palace floor. The daemon god held the hilt tightly with both of his gauntlets. The blade began to vibrate and hum. Pools of bright red blood flowed down from it's sharp edges spilling over the marble. Heat eminated from the sword filling the inner sanctum with shimmering waves of warp energy. The Skulltaker lifted one gauntlet from the long hilt gripping the bottom of his helmet's facemask pulling it free. Tzneetch watched as the other daemon god began to slowly transform. Abraxas' dark metalled skin face softened taking on the hue of pale flesh. His long braids of iron hair straightened out changing to a flowing mane of jet black hair. His bright red eyes shrank into a pair of mortal eyes. The dark irises looked on in amusement. Slowly Abraxas shrank in size and girth until only a young eldar male stood in place of the daemon. His hard plates of burnt armor fell away one by one clanking against the bloody floor.

"What is this?" said the Lord of Change.

"I have cast off my daemonic form finally reverting back to my original form. As you are well aware I once an eldar. I yearn to be at the side of my dear sister Namora and I know she dreaded what I have become. Now hold to our bargain and free my mind of this awful madness."

"You are not mad at all." said Tzneetch. He pointed towards the sigil mounted to Abraxas' chest. "That rune of yours you kept hidden away has obviously fully restored your mental facilities. As it has been whispered you are truly a far greater liar than I ever was!"

Abraxas laughed as he lifted the Sword of Khaine. "You are the mad one indeed and in a most extraordinary way. You have tangled all the strands of fate here with your Garden walls. They are so deeply twisted and intertwined that no one, not even a god could ever even hope to pull them all loose. In your reign of sheer madness you have stopped all time and brought about the very end.

"Behold the Sword of Khaine!" Abraxas swung the weapon at the Lord of Change forcing Tzneetch to jump back out of it's blazing arc. "This artefact humbles you! You were a fool to let me come here. The Sword of Khaine holds my daemonic essence and I can will it back at anytime I desire. I studied the void surrounding your Garden for ages. I knew you laid here in wait at this nexus. I had to devise a scheme that would fool the greatest cheat of all time and I did. You are not as wise and smart as you think brother god. I am the new Khorne not the old one! Your vanity was your ultimate undoing. I knew if I came here broken and spent you would buy into my charade and you did indeed. You are a sucker and there is no better word for it." With those final words Abraxas began to grow again taking back the shape of the murderous daemon god. His armor was recast to perfection and shone. Taking up his huge pair of cybernetic wings the Skulltaker rose up into the air charging the high throne. The Sword of Khaine came down hard cleaving the throne in twain. Each half split off reforming into a new throne. One was pink and one was blue. Next the blade cut down Tzneetch also chopping the Lord of Change in two perfect halves. One half morphed into a huge pink Horror and the other into a tiny blue Horror. The pair of daemons scuttled over to the two thrones, the pink Horror sat down upon the blue throne and the blue one sat down upon the pink throne. Abraxas' laughter filled the palace as he soared up to the top of the hall cutting sharply at the twisted strands of fate. The sword burned through them as Khorne continued his attack upon the nexus.

The strands of Fate were finally unbound raveling free again. Time began to move forward. As the strands broke loose untwisting and spinning about their trapped energies poured out into the multiverse. The Garden of Oblivion began to shake as the dark matter collasped. Huge cracks opened and hard tremors raced through the super shards. Abraxas watched silently. His work had been done.

"I am free of this mortal coil and can finally return to my beloved Namora!" thought the daemon god. Abraxas smiled as he lifted the Sword of Khaine ready to cut a path open to his sister's world.

There was the sound of an immense explosion as the ground before the Skulltaker blew apart. A huge Space Marine clad in red power armor stood upon the open ground. "You there daemon. I have come forth from the center of the nexus to slay you." The giant Marine had dark bronzed skin and his face was covered with deep long scars. Long brilliant blonde hair spilled down upon his shoulderguards and his eyes were a deep icy blue. "All things must come to an end."