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Who is this Sly Marbo or whatever his name is? Everyone talks about him but I don't know anything.

Thats on purpose.

Be glad you dont know about him. Most people learn about him by a stealthy catachan blade slicing across their throat from behind by Marbo.

I heard he broke a hive tyrants neck

When he was 7 years old

I heard he once had a sidekick for a short time.

That sidekick was known as the God Emprah of Mankind.

Sly Marbo disapproves of this thread, and will be arriving presently at your home with a demo-charge in his hand.

1. Sly Marbo's tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried. Ever.
2. Sly Marbo does not sleep. He waits.
3. Sly Marbo is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.
4. The chief export of Sly Marbo is pain.
5. If you can see Sly Marbo, he can see you. If you can't see Sly Marbo, you may be only seconds away from death.
6. Sly Marbo has counted to infinity. Twice.
7. Sly Marbo does not hunt because the word hunting implies the probability of failure. Sly Marbo goes killing.
8. Sly Marbo doesn’t wash his clothes, he disembowels them.
9. Sly Marbo is 1/8th Cherokee. This has nothing to do with ancestry, the man ate a f***ing Indian.
10. In fine print on the last page of the Guinness Book of World Records it notes that all world records are held by Sly Marbo, and those listed in the book are simply the closest anyone else has ever gotten.
11. There is no chin behind Sly Marbo's beard. There is only another fist.
12. Sly Marbo once roundhouse kicked someone so hard that his foot broke the speed of light, went back in time, and killed Amelia Earhart while she was flying over the Pacific Ocean.
13. Crop circles are Sly Marbo's way of telling the world that sometimes corn needs to lie the f*** down.
14. Sly Marbo is ten feet tall, weighs two-tons, breathes fire, and could eat a hammer and take a shotgun blast standing.
15. The Great Wall of China was originally created to keep Sly Marbo out. It failed miserably.
16. If you ask Sly Marbo what time it is, he always says, "Two seconds 'till." After you ask, "Two seconds 'til what?" he roundhouse kicks you in the face.
17. Sly Marbo drives an ice cream truck covered in human skulls.
18. Sly Marbo sold his soul to the devil for his rugged good looks and unparalleled martial arts ability. Shortly after the transaction was finalized, Sly Marbo roundhouse-kicked the devil in the face and took his soul back. The devil, who appreciates irony, couldn't stay mad and admitted he should have seen it coming. They now play poker every second Wednesday of the month.
19. There is no theory of evolution; just a list of creatures Sly Marbo allows to live.
20. Sly Marbo once ate three 72 oz. steaks in one hour. He spent the first 45 minutes having sex with his waitress.
21. Sly Marbo is the only man to ever defeat a brick wall in a game of tennis.
22. Sly Marbo doesn't churn butter. He roundhouse kicks the cows and the butter comes straight out.
23. When Sly Marbo sends in his taxes, he sends blank forms and includes only a picture of himself, crouched and ready to attack. Sly Marbo has not had to pay taxes ever.
24. The quickest way to a man's heart is with Sly Marbo's fist.
25. A Handicap parking sign does not signify that this spot is for handicapped people. It is actually in fact a warning, that the spot belongs to Sly Marbo and that you will be handicapped if you park there.
26. Sly Marbo will attain statehood in 2009. His state flower will be the Magnolia.
27. Nagasaki never had a bomb dropped on it. Sly Marbo jumped out of a plane and punched the ground.
28. Sly Marbo originally appeared in the "Street Fighter II" video game, but was removed by Beta Testers because every button caused him to do a roundhouse kick. When asked bout this "glitch," Sly Marbo replied, "That's no glitch."
29. The opening scene of the movie "Saving Private Ryan" is loosely based on games of dodge ball Sly Marbo played in second grade.
30. Sly Marbo once shot down a German fighter plane with his finger, by yelling, "Bang!"
31. Sly Marbo once bet NASA he could survive re-entry without a spacesuit. On July 19th, 1999, a naked Sly Marbo re-entered the earth's atmosphere, streaking over 14 states and reaching a temperature of 3000 degrees. An embarrassed NASA publicly claimed it was a meteor, and still owes him a beer.
32. Sly Marbo has two speeds: Walk and Kill.
33. Someone once tried to tell Sly Marbo that roundhouse kicks aren't the best way to kick someone. Historians have recorded this as the worst mistake anyone has ever made.
34. Contrary to popular belief, America is not a democracy, it is a Sly Marbotatorship.
35. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles is based on a true story: Sly Marbo once swallowed a turtle whole, and when he crapped it out, the turtle was six feet tall and had learned karate.
36. Sly Marbo is not hung like a horse... horses are hung like Sly Marbo.
37. Sly Marbo is the only human being to display the Heisenberg uncertainty principle -- you can never know both exactly where and how quickly he will roundhouse-kick you in the face.
38. Sly Marbo can drink an entire gallon of milk in forty-seven seconds.
39. Rather than being birthed like a normal child, Sly Marbo instead decided to punch his way out of his mother’s womb.
40. If you say Sly Marbo's name in Mongolia, the people there will roundhouse kick you in his honor. Their kick will be followed by the REAL roundhouse delivered by none other than Sly Marbo himself.
41. Time waits for no man. Unless that man is Sly Marbo.
42. Sly Marbo discovered a new theory of relativity involving multiple universes in which Sly Marbo is even more badass than in this one. When it was discovered by Albert Einstein and made public, Sly Marbo roundhouse-kicked him in the face. We know Albert Einstein today as Stephen Hawking.
43. The Sly Marbo military unit was not used in the game Civilization 4, because a single Sly Marbo could defeat the entire combined nations of the world in one turn.
44. In an average living room there are 1,242 objects Sly Marbo could use to kill you, including the room itself.
45. Sly Marbo does not teabag the ladies. He potato-sacks them.
46. Pluto is actually an orbiting group of British soldiers from the American Revolution who entered space after Sly Marbo gave them a roundhouse kick to the face.
47. When Sly Marbo goes to donate blood, he declines the syringe, and instead requests a handgun and a bucket.
48. There are no weapons of mass destruction. Just Sly Marbo.
49. Sly Marbo once challenged Lance Armstrong in a "Who has more testicles?" contest. Sly Marbo won by 5.
50. Sly Marbo was the fourth wise man, who gave baby Jesus the gift of beard, which he carried with him until he died. The other three wise men were enraged by the preference that Jesus showed to Sly Marbo's gift, and arranged to have him written out of the bible. All three died soon after of mysterious roundhouse-kick related injuries.
51. Sly Marbo sheds his skin twice a year.
52. When Sly Marbo calls 1-900 numbers, he doesn’t get charged. He holds up the phone and money falls out.
53. Sly Marbo once ate a whole cake before his friends could tell him there was a stripper in it.
54. There are no races, only countries of people Sly Marbo has beaten to different shades of black and blue.
55. Sly Marbo can't finish a "color by numbers" because his markers are filled with the blood of his victims. Unfortunately, all blood is dark red.
56. A Sly Marbo-delivered Roundhouse Kick is the preferred method of execution in 16 states.
57. When Sly Marbo falls in water, Sly Marbo doesn't get wet. Water gets Sly Marbo.
58. Sly Marbo's urine was the main ingredient for balco's designer steroids. Therefore, Sly Marbo is actually the all-time single-season home run king.
59. Scientists have estimated that the energy given off during the Big Bang is roughly equal to 1CNRhK (Sly Marbo Roundhouse Kick)
60. Sly Marbo's house has no doors, only walls that he walks through.
61. When Sly Marbo has sex with a man, it won't be because he is gay. It will be because he has run out of women.
62. How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could Sly Marbo? ...All of it.
63. Sly Marbo doesn't actually write books, the words assemble themselves out of fear.
64. In honor of Sly Marbo, all McDonald's in Texas have an even larger size than the super-size. When ordering, just ask to be "Sly Marbosized".
65. Sly Marbo CAN believe it's not butter.
66. If tapped, a Sly Marbo roundhouse kick could power the country of Australia for 44 minutes.
67. The grass is always greener on the other side, unless Sly Marbo has been there. In that case the grass is most likely soaked in blood and tears.
68. Newton's Third Law is wrong: Although it states that for each action, there is an equal and opposite reaction, there is no force equal in reaction to a Sly Marbo roundhouse kick.
69. Sly Marbo invented his own type of karate. It's called Sly Marbo-Will-Kill.
70. Wilt Chamberlain claims to have slept with more than 20,000 women in his lifetime. Sly Marbo calls this "a slow Tuesday."
71. Contrary to popular belief, there is indeed enough Sly Marbo to go around.
72. Sly Marbo doesn’t shave; he kicks himself in the face. The only thing that can cut Sly Marbo is Sly Marbo.
73. For some, the left testicle is larger than the right one. For Sly Marbo, each testicle is larger than the other one.
74. When taking the SAT, write "Sly Marbo" for every answer. You will score a 1600.
75. Sly Marbo invented black. In fact, he invented the entire spectrum of visible light. Except pink. Tom Cruise invented pink.
76. When you're Sly Marbo, anything + anything is equal to 1. One roundhouse kick to the face.
77. Archeologists unearthed an old English dictionary dating back to the year 1236. It defined "victim" as "one who has encountered Sly Marbo"
78. Sly Marbo ordered a Big Mac at Burger King, and got one.
79. Sly Marbo brings the noise AND the funk.
80. You know how they say if you die in your dream then you will die in real life? In actuality, if you dream of death then Sly Marbo will find you and kill you.
81. Sly Marbo can slam a revolving door.


Apologies to Chuck...

Sly Marbo is the Guard's Chuch Norris. He is an independent character who may appear anywhere on the board from reserve, wounds on 2+, carries a demo charge, and pretty much means a bad day for any unit h sets his sights on. All for under 70 points.

From what i have heard, the current Marbo sounds a whole lot better than the old one

Yea, Marbo is awesome...but all Catachans are awesome....

From a thread I made some time ago:




A Catachan sneaking up on you is actually just being courteous enough to not make your last few minutes as grief stricken, urine stained, and terrifying as they could be.

Even a mark of chaos isn't as dark as the shiner you get from a catachan's kiss.

On predator homeworlds there's a pyramid where once every hunderd years Catachans send their youths to hunt them.

Catachans are the reason that Furiens and Mandalore aren't in 40k.

Catachan Devils can sneak up on the eye of Sauron in broad daylight across an open field wearing flourescents ponchos.

Catachans are the reason there are no Wood-Eldar tribes in 40k.

Catachan women use 'morning after' pills as prenatal vitamins when pregnant with Catachan children.

While not actually magical, a Catachan blade is so sharp it can kill a spirit host or banshee.

If bit by a Catachan you won't actually become a Catachan(that's an old wive's tale)

C'tan is actually Hiveganger slang for a Catachan.

It's true. Catachans sell their surplus 'swords' to the Callidus temple to make a little extra during the holidays.

An unarmed catachan can disarm a Catcus with two moves. A Devil can do it in one and use the Cactus's momentum against it.

Catachans often visit the Emperor to see how he's holding up without mentioning the fact that he was beat up by a sissy-girl. They really do care as is obvious by the flowers and cards that the Adeptus Custodes clean up after them.

(nonchalantly) It's true. It's true.

statu wrote:From what i have heard, the current Marbo sounds a whole lot better than the old one

I actualy liked the old Marbo better.... he could assault after appearing, his blade was a s3 powerweapon that got rerolls to wound, and he got a 2+ cover in woods........

http://www.chucknorrisfacts.com/
+
http://wh40k.lexicanum.com/wiki/Sly_Marbo = SLY MARBO