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It is the 41st millennium. Forget the power of technology and science, for so much has been forgotten, never to be re-learned. Forget the promise of progress and understanding, for in the grim darkness of the far future there is only war. There is no peace amongst the stars, only an eternity of carnage and slaughter, and the laughter of thirsting gods.



Astropath helmvus was worried. The Gellar field had flickered right before they entered the warp, and all on board knew what would happen if the fields flickered for even a second while in the warp
Deamons.
Deamons would enter the ship and tear apart the crew. Bursting through the walls and devouring their minds and body’s, even as they drove the men mad with their presence.
The astropath calmed himself with knowledge that there were astartes aboard. Sighing, the warptoched slumped in his seat and rubbed his third eye
Astartes. Demigods. Angles of death. The hammer of the emperor. His will made manifest. These as well as a hundred other names were justly deserved.
Clunk...clunk…clunk….clunk
Helmvus sat bolt upright, as if he had been hit with a grox-prod. Staring straight into the warp he checked the astronomican, confirming that they were in the ultima segmentum, deep in the halo stars. A massive armored hand rested on the headrest of the navigators throne.
“Pray tell helmvus, where are we?” asked a deep baritone voice.
The navigator gulped. “m-my lord severus, w-we are d-d-deep in the halo s-stars my lord.”
Severus frowned. The astartes had a handsom chisled visige, accentuated by his bristly mustache and scraggly brown beard combination, along with deep green eyes and a thickly corded neck.
The only oddity about him was his pale skin. His skin had tanned somewhat but one would still notice that it was not his natural coloration.
His armor was immaculate, its light green not marred by a spot of oil nor mud.
The astartes frowned.
Helmvus went wobbly kneed . ‘Oh god-emperor’ he thought
The marine looked at him. “Helmvus, for emperors sake, stop shaking!”
Helmvus stared up at the astartes for a long moment, terror in his eyes.
Blood leaked from the astropaths mouth. He screamed.
Leaping out of his chair the astropath rolled on the floor, bawling until two serfs restrained him.
Severus picked up the man by the hood and inquired “what in the warp is it Helmvus?”
Helmvus stared, after a long moment he murmured a faraway look in his eyes
“I cannot sense the astronomican.”

Then everything turned white

so? what do you think?

Pretty good...
Needs to be longer but pretty good.
Some descriptions of the sourroundings and also the characters would be nice.

Thanks the next chapters are going to be longer and more descriptive in a few minutes i'm going to bed it is pretty late in kathmandu and I wake up and shower by 9

ill be on the forum for a couple more minutes

Fair enough, i know how that is.

'night all
ineptus signing off

expect next chapter up by this time tommorrow

Hi! I am back

working on chapter 2

It seems this could be cool but what are the "Halo Stars"? Forgive me but I don't no of any Halo Stars in ether Halo or 40,000 so it might be Star Trek.

the halo stars name are a complete coincidence they are the ring of stars at the outer rim of the galaxy named as such because they form a "halo" around the galaxy

they are described in detail here http://wh40k.lexicanum.com/wiki/Halo_Stars

I See will there be a actual Halo Array or Forerunner creations?

How are ou going to balance out the space marines? Compared to nearly everything else they will be OP. Better be seeing plenty of glassing, NOVA bmobs, red matter, halos and maybe (If you are having them intejwct during the main story or something) an entire wave of S3's, even if they are only slightly better than stormtroopers.

There will be problems with the balance unless their is a large amount of enemy's.

check dramatis personae for there is no peace amongst the stars its only 100 marines and a strike cruiser
for now...

and probably no array or forunner creations as this is set in star trek

but i might add some covenant forces

I will though be accepting ideas that have some merit to add to the plot.

hello?

Will the Elites be appearing? Or Sangheili for the proper name.

Yes the sangheili will be appearing they are actually pivotal to the plot (check 'dramatis personae')

If you would like to make any request for factions\species I will conseider them

NEED COMMENTS!!!!!!!!!
will post thi next chapter in a few hours to half an hour

Dakka Fictions isn't very busy so it may be a while before you get any comments...

current amount of writing for the second chapter is 2and1\2 pages it may go up to 4 pages

Posting in a couple of minuets!!!

In the black of space an elegant ship seemingly materialized. A circular mainframe sat atop a swanlike neck, which was in turn connected with a crossbar, and two drive nacelles.
Captain Jean-Luc Picard of the USS enterprise stared out at the black of space from his command chair.
The Enterprise had been following a strange anomaly that had somehow appeared in the DMZ orbiting nondescript planet of Murkuss VIII in federation territory
“Sir, we are approaching the anomaly.” Asked the voice of lieutenant data. The androids yellow eyes remained fixed upon the screen
“Noted lieutenant.” Said picard, his face and voice betraying nothing.
Several moments passed.
Data spoke up again “sir, should we disengage our warp engines?”
“Make it so.”
Picard stared intently as starlines receded into pinpricks of light, determined to find out what had enough power to spike the records of thirty-two anomaly observations centers and hade the general mass of twenty times the size of the Enterprise. Questions whirled through Picard’s mind.
How could something like that appear with no prior warning? How could it have sutch massive energy outputs? Why was it here?

As the Enterprise drew closer with the behemoth it became apparent that it was at least 5 kilometers long.
Picard stared intently at the looming speck. What was it? He thought .
“sir?” came the voice of commander William Riker, picard’s second in command.
“yes, number one?”
Riker responded accordingly “Sir, we could magnetize the image for a better view.”
“make it so.”
The image swelled to fill the veiwport.
Gasps resounded around the deck, riker sprang to his feet, picard’s eyes widened.
It was a warship.
A warship at least a dozen times the size of a dominion battleship.
What’s more is that whatever spiecies created the ship was obviously not afraid of death, skulls emblazoned on gold and adamantium adorned the surfaces of the ship.
And it lay dead in space.
Its running lights however were on. But the most unnerving thing about he ship was not the ship its self, but the borg sphere docked at one side.



_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________





Laertes opend his eyes, the warp current that had somhow propelled them into a warp storm which in turn had expelled them from the emperors light had done some unpleasant things with his mind.
The Astartes groaned and stood up, shaking off any weariness that had not abated when he opened his eyes. Checking his HUD he realized with a jolt that he had been out for five days.
Always combat ready he reached for his bolter, it felt reassuring to have the massive death-dealing rectangle in his power armored hands again.
Striding down corridors the marine noticed that his navy counterparts were still out cold, he allowed himself a moment of pride in the enhanced biology of an astartes. The fact that he had been effectively slacking off sobered him up in record time.

As Laertes reached the bridge he stopped before the image of the emporor on a massive tapestry that hung above the blast doors, and bowed his head in prayer
‘OUR FATHER, WHO ART ON TERRA, HALLOWED IS THY NAME. ALLOW US TO KILL THE HERETIC AS THEY WOULD KILL US. IN THY MOST HOLY NAME, AMEN.’
Laertes arrived on the bridge-cum chalpel to find everyone unconscious.
Save one.
“brother sergeant, Severus.”
His superior looked at him, and cracked a wan smile. “brother laertes.”
“What of the ship?” asked laertes, the ever-tactful
Severus scratched his chin and looked up at the high domed arches, gargoyles and tattered battle-banners adorning the roof, before replying
“Shields are online, though propulsion and weapons are offline”

The screendenly flickered. “We are being hailed, hopefully its an imperial ship, mayhap a rouge trader.” Said the sergeant, remarkably unperturbed by the sudden turn of events.

On the screen a servitor like drone appeared with implants scattered seemingly at random throughout its body. Two others stood behind it their pallid flesh covered in sweat and mottled dark areas, their bald heads jammed full of mechanical implants.
Laertes felt his lip curl in disgust. What way was this to treat the machine, by ramming it into the body with no purpose?
The thing opend it mouth and proceeded to desecrate the gothic tongue with its foul presence

"we are the Borg. You will lower your shields and surrender your ship. you will be assimilated into the collective. Your biological and technological distinctiveness will be added to our own. Your culture will adapt to service us... Resistance is futile.”

I'd suggest using Word Processor or a spell checker program, the story will be better if you fix you're spelling and grammar.

O.K

Just a note.
Borg shields are useless against solid slug weapons such as bolters... they will be slaughtered.

purplefood wrote:Just a note.
Borg shields are useless against solid slug weapons such as bolters... they will be slaughtered.

I think that depends on how much of a Star Trek fan he is, lets see...
I have heard Star Trek fans claim that the Enterprise couldn't be hit by Imperium weapons, and that it could single handedly defeat the Imperium.

So far the story is good, the only thing I find off is the space marine's prayer. I might suggest making it sound a little less like the Lord's Prayer.
Also, what if the Borg got corrupted by Chaos? That might make a cool plot devise in this story.

The Obliterator virus would be deadly...

General Seric wrote:

purplefood wrote:Just a note.
Borg shields are useless against solid slug weapons such as bolters... they will be slaughtered.

I think that depends on how much of a Star Trek fan he is, lets see...
I have heard Star Trek fans claim that the Enterprise couldn't be hit by Imperium weapons, and that it could single handedly defeat the Imperium.

So far the story is good, the only thing I find off is the space marine's prayer. I might suggest making it sound a little less like the Lord's Prayer.
Also, what if the Borg got corrupted by Chaos? That might make a cool plot devise in this story.

personally, I believe that the imperium can beat anything thrown at it. and kick it back into orbit in pieces.

in the 40k universe the enterprise has the life expectancy of a tyranid gaunt against a baneblade.
about the prayer
I just couldent think up of any good on. I have gone to church only about 19 times in my life

Also, what is the obliterator virus?