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Hello,

I was wondering what everyone thought of my chapters lore. I play for fun at my game club, so for me I like to have a story

Lore of the icewing chapter:
After the horus herasy, most of the chapter was broken. There home world was destroyed and all of there attack fleet was destroyed. They were left with only a handful of bikes and just a few soldires. They have been abandoned by the other chapeters and they have taken it apon themselves to hunt the Hive Fleet Jotunheim. They have adapted a lightening attack docterin. They rarely recruit becasue by the time they get to a new planet, they fight with tyranid. They take any survivers with them and train them along the way. They have been trying to rebuild there chapter, but cannot due to the fact that they are not planet bond. When they asked for help from the ultramarines in rebuilding there chapter, the ultramarines attacked them and destroyed there remaining 1st company. After that the remaining marines fled and reformed into there current state. Battered they investigated and found that the other chapters have deemed them heritics. Determined that the honor of there chapter must be restored they have fought the tyranid in course for the tau sector. They have recruited a large amount of imperial guard followers in hopes of helping the tau fight back the tyranid. The final ditch effort is by helping the tau, in the eyes of there fellow chapters, to be redeemed and make some new allies along the way.

My list:
2000 pt. Ice Wing army
(space marine codex with space wolves allies)
HQ: Captain on bike with storm shield and power sword 165 pt.
Command squad with company standard, champion 145 pt.
HQ (wolves): rune preist on bike 135 pt.
troops: maxed bike suad with 2 flamers and a combi-flamer 275 pt.
maxed bike suad with 2 flamers and a combi-flamer 275 pt.
maxed bike suad with 2 flamers and a combi-flamer 275 pt.
troops (wolves): 5 blood claws in a razorback with twinlinked heavy bolter 115 pt.
5 blood claws in a razorback with tinlinked heavy bolter 115 pt.
1500 pt.
Heavy support: landraider redemmer 245 pt.
Heavy support (wolves): longfangs with missile launchers in razorback with heavy bolters 180 pt.
fast attack: attack bike 40 pt.
attack bike 40 pt.
Total: 2005 pt.

I was wondering what you guys think of the lore with the matching list.

Edit: spelling and grammer


Automatically Appended Next Post:
Any thoughts? comments, questions. Things I could add or change. Also what kinda tau forces are on there outer planets, military wise?

If you are tying your Chapter to the Heresy, what Legion are they descendent from? The only Marine organizational force at that time was the Legion, the Chapter organization came about after the Heresy.

The background fluff sounds good, but a lot like Souldrinkers mixed with Ravenguard. Keep developing it, good start.

Not knowing where there legion came from they faught along side the white scars durring the Heresy. They are belived to have been a desendent of the white scars but all record of them fighting for the emperor have been lost. Since then, they have faught the black legion along side other chapters but soon after the fighting, there battle brothers soon turned there fire on them. The only chapter that has faught along side them has been the space wolves as they have the same lust for fighting. The IceWing have faught on many warzones, but mostly stick to winter or frosted warzones due to the fact that there armour blends into snow. They have "recovered" a land raider from the ultrramarines after a battle. To avenge there fallen brothers, they opened fire on the ultramarines durring a clash with tyranid, and soon recovered a land raider and a few razzor backs.


Just some more lore I was working on. Didn't look to any other chapters lore when making my lore.

They sound like a hit and run chapter with all that mobility. You might have to go into why the other SM's think they are traitors and why the ultra's hate them so much.
I like the general lay out but you story could do with adding to so it sound more flowing instead of just statements. I hope this helps, keep going

TheGamer555 wrote:
Not knowing where there [their] legion came from they faught along side the white scars durring the Heresy. They are belived to have been a desendent of the white scars but all record of them fighting for the emperor have been lost. Since then, they have faught the black legion along side other chapters but soon after the fighting, there [their] battle brothers soon turned there [their] fire on them. The only chapter that has faught along side them has been the space wolves as they have the same lust for fighting. The IceWing have faught on many warzones, but mostly stick to winter or frosted warzones due to the fact that there armour blends into snow. They have "recovered" a land raider from the ultrramarines after a battle. To avenge there [their] fallen brothers, they opened fire on the ultramarines durring a clash with tyranid, and soon recovered a land raider and a few razzor backs.


Just some more lore I was working on. Didn't look to any other chapters lore when making my lore.

K two things,

First your English is outstanding (as most German's are), but I have a pet peeve of allowing someone who clearly has a grasp of the language to get away of misusing the word there (like look over there), and their (his habit, my habit, their habit), mostly because I kick myself whenever I do it. I have edited your post and inserted a [their] where it belongs. Remember, if you want to impress your friends back home, the word [their] means whatever is on the right side of it is 'owned' by what that [their] is pertaining to. ("Their Legion." : That is their legion and no one else's.)This is not a putdown, nor will I ever do it again - I apologize if I have offended you.

K, so moving away from my anal grammar:

Second, it's reasonable to say that your chapter are decedents of the White Scars Legion and that your Chapter Master was simply an officer that was given the honor of founding his own order with his most trusted cadre of warriors. This was after all the breakup of a major Legion - there are hundreds of chapters and it's virtually saying the same thing as "they fought alongside the White Scars." You may also like the idea that your Chapter still fought alongside the White Scars, but is actually part of the lost Legions that bears no name and knows no Primarch. Understandably, as a fleet based Chapter, they travel extensively throughout the galaxy, could certainly befriend the SW's, fight the tyrannids, recover artifacts and holy relics, step on the toes of the Ultramarines, requisition the IG, and not shoot Tau at first sight because there are more pressing matters to deal with. All of this is plausible, and upon the fringe of the Tau Empire (depending if it is expanding towards you or not) the Imperium is being encroached by the xenos aggressors. War is erupting over territory dispute and non-aggression pacts are difficult to come by for many reasons. The xenos capabilities are likely very strong where they are needed to gain control of a new planet, and only moderate everywhere else, unless an Ethereal is involved, which is a completely different manner.

All this aside, the only thing I see lacking in your fluff is a true motive. Why do your SM's even want to do what they are doing? What's the purpose behind their quests and conflicts? If you can answer these questions, you'll have the army you're looking for.

More lore I wrote in the hospital yesterday:

IceWing feud with the ultramarines:
Once the white scars legion was split into chpaters a small force splintered off of one of the chapters created. Captain Lortex lead his company into a chase of the black legion. After a flase message was recived from the renigade force, they opened fire on the ultramarine strike force. The ultramarines then vowed that they would slay all the IceWing. From that point on they were seen as trators by the other chapters. The IceWing then found themselves surrounded by the Tyranid Hive fleet, Jotunheim. After fighting a long gurling battle they finally managed to escape they found themselves beening draw in to a Tau planets atmosphere. After a crash landing they witnessed a Tau hunting creed fighting back a large Tyranid force. Relizing that the Tau are there only hope of survival they launch themselves into the Tyranid flank. Soon later the Tyranid were pushed back. With the fighting over Captain Lortex and the Tau Ethereal sat down to negotiations. As negotiations were under way a large genestealer swarm attacked and the Tyranid returned. Having lost many troops the Tau relized that they needed the IceWing force to help them. The fighting was gruling and having lost many lives the Tau and IceWing faught their way to a Tau manta and managed to leave the planet. The Tau, now planetless agreed to aid the IceWing on there conquest to prove that they are not traitors, but rather loyal marines. After many years the IceWing had recruted many to fill in there numbers and have managed to create a small chapter. Using weapons and armour stolen from the renigade marines they had managed to build a 5 company chapter. Soon the chapter then recruited the Tau into there ranks and had formed 2 more companies. After much research the Tau found an artifact on there world they left behind and begged the Chapter Master, Lortex, to aid them in trying to take back there home from the Tyranid. Soon the IceWing chapter found itself fighting the Tyranid in many conflicts and have adapted an effective way of killing them. Finally arriving back to the Tau home world they found themselves fighting waves after waves of hormagaunts and termagaunts. The Tau commander lead his company into a daring attempt to retrive the lost artifact, the pulse generator, an engien that could power the entire chapters fleet at once and would allow them to create a perminent home on the Tau home world. Flanked by many swarms of hormagaunts and termagaunts the tau were swiftly over welmed by tyranid and slain. Chapter Master Lortex and his command squad spearheaded an atempt to recover the Tau captain's body. Soon relizing how many hormagaunts where there, he was swiftly cut down by the Tyranid commander, a dreaded Swarmlord. Soon the Ultramarines arived and started to kill anything that moved, human or xeno. The IceWing now badly battered, rallyed under the comand of the captain, Texas. He tricked an ultramarine landraider squadren into an ambush, and swifly took control of 3 of them and destroyed the rest. After desroying 20 of the ultramarines tanks, 2 of the landraiders had been destroyed. Texas then rushed into close combat with the Swarmlord and after taking many wounds, he had finally vanquished his foe. The ultramarines then left thinking the rest of the Tyranid would slay the remaining IceWing. After many more loses and the lose of the 1st, 3rd, 5th and 6th company, The IceWing began to create a home world and started to create defences. The 2nd company left the planet to recruit more troops. The remaing Tau in the 7th companie recovered the artifact and aided in creating a home for the broken IceWing.

-Ultramarines have around 100 tanks so that wuld be all their tanks
-Tau are Xenos and only started existing around M41.
-Tau can't be made marines.

Changed the number of tanks destroyed to 20, it was roughly around the M41 that the Ultramariens and the IceWing fought this piticular fight