Chuck Norris vs Mr.T (War)

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**lord of the ghosts**

This is a twist of the thread WAR!! (the original)
It works like this: Mr.T is awesome
Then in the next post: Chuck Norris is better.
BUT these MUST be in a form of a 'fact' or image or even webpage.
I'll start:

Mr. T is so scary that his hair is actually afraid to grow. The only reason he has a mohawk is because it's in his blind spot.

**halonachos**

I'll bite.

Chuck Norris has no hair on his privates, hair can't grow on steel.

**jwelvis629**

There is no God, Tooth Fairy or Santa. The Post Office delivers all letters to Mr. T

**lord of the ghosts**

Jesus can walk on water, but Chuck Norris can swim through land.

**shas'o vera**

did you know that the tri froce from the legand of zelda is a real thing? and that if all three pieces are brought together then it will unleash a power that can destroy the world.
but each piece is held by the most powerful people in the world: chuck norris, mr T and vin deisel.
but they will never be combined because chuck norris thinks mohawks are gay mr T thinks beards are gay and vin thinks that hair in general is gay.

**shas'o vera**

did you know that the tri froce from the legand of zelda is a real thing? and that if all three pieces are brought together then it will unleash a power that can destroy the world.
but each piece is held by the most powerful people in the world: chuck norris, mr T and vin deisel.
but they will never be combined because chuck norris thinks mohawks are gay mr T thinks beards are gay and vin thinks that hair in general is gay.

**jwelvis629**

geez, I thought that was Michael Phelps!

Mr. T is so incorruptible, he will only sell out for a Snickers

**lord of the ghosts**

Chuck Norris successfully mated a graham craker with a knife.

**jwelvis629**

Mr. T invented the color BLACK... He pities the fool who invented pink... Tom Cruise.

**shas'o vera**

well, chuck norris walked into a bar, it exploded instantly because no building can hold that level of awesome

**jwelvis629**

when Mr. T does a push up, he pushes the earth down

**Hawkins**

Chuck's left butt cheek, once all by its-self, strangled 54 drug runners, and a parakeet.

**lord of the ghosts**

Mr.T can srangle you with a cordless phone.

**shas'o vera**

chuck norris tears can cure cancer, too bad he never cries

**jwelvis629**

Mr. T has sex with every woman on the planet once a month while they sleep... he is so rough, that they have cramps and bleed for a week.

**shas'o vera**

chuck norris counted to infinity, twice

**jwelvis629**

Mr T. isn't hung like a horse... horses are hung like Mr. T

**shas'o vera**

chuck norris won a game of tennis against a wall
A WALL!!!!!

**person person**

**jwelvis629**

Mr. T plays santa to Nancy Reagan... 'nuff said!

**lord of the ghosts**

If you say "Chuck Norris" three times while staring at a mirror, Chuck Norris will appear and kill everyone in your house. But look on the bright side, you'll see Chuck Norris!!

**shas'o vera**

lord of the ghosts wrote:If you say "Chuck Norris" three times while staring at a mirror, Chuck Norris will appear and kill everyone in your house. But look on the bright side, you'll see Chuck Norris!!

bad side is that he will be the last thing you will see

**lord of the ghosts**

shas'o vera wrote:
lord of the ghosts wrote:If you say "Chuck Norris" three times while staring at a mirror, Chuck Norris will appear and kill everyone in your house. But look on the bright side, you'll see Chuck Norris!!

bad side is that he will be the last thing you will see

What was going through Chuck Norris' enemies mind when Chuck Norris was in the room? His foot.

**shas'o vera**

only chuck norris can prevent forest fires

**halonachos**

Chuck Norris once roundhouse kicked a guy so hard his foot traveled through time and killed Amelia Earhart while she was flying over the Atlantic.

April 1st became known as "April Fool's Day" only after Mr. T decided it would be easier to pity a whole bunch of fools on a set date rather than pitying a few fools each day.

**shas'o vera**

chuck norris went back in time to when j.f.k was assinated, he deflected all the bullets with his beard and j,f,k's head exploded becuase of chuck norris's pure awesomeness

**Lint**

Mr. T once visited the Virgin Islands. They are now known as the "Islands."

**Gitzbitah**

The Haydron super collider was actually built solely to contain an atom roundhouse kicked by Chuck Norris until it slowed down enough for scientist to see what a bruised atom looks like.

Spoiler Alert- They are white, like everything else that has ever seen Chuck Norris's size 11's raised in anger.

**jwelvis629**

Chuck Norris is so fast he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head

**Lint**

Mr. T clogs the toilet when he takes a piss.