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Thought i'd write up the fluff for my new 500 point Space Marine army and see if i got any feedback.
I sourced a lot of the story from here as i was always interested in this man's infamous quote.



'Ammal's Apostles'

'Chaplain Ammal the Evangelist' made his name during the Inquisitorial 'Béziers Crusade'. Béziers is a Hive City on the planet Gaia which had been corrupted by heretical beliefs. All of the heretical activity was confined to the 2 lowest levels and after an inspection an Inquisitorial distress call was sent to the surrounding planets and airspace. The call required a quick response from any Imperial troops in the area to begin cleansing the bottom 10 levels of Béziers. A small Space Marine Chapter by the name of 'Pandora's Lost Souls' intercepted the signal en-route to their nearby home world(they had received word of similar problems).

Pandora dispatched his head Chaplain, Ammal, and a small contingent of Marines in a tiny transport ship to start the cleansing.
When Ammal arrived at Béziers he found that no other militia had arrived to aid them. As highest ranking officer he decided that he would try and save as much of the population as he could before other troops arrived to start the cleansing. Not only did Ammal save two-thousand-five-hundred imperial citizens but so was the passion with which he preached that approximately two-thousand signed themselves up for Imperial duties(many of whom had been gang members).

Eventually the gangs organised and started a rebellion, with so little troops at his command, Ammal ordered the cleansing begin and he lead it personally. When a Scout Sergeant named Gabe(now 'Gabe the Herald') came to him and asked how his men were to distinguish the traitors from the loyalists, he said; "Kill them all. For the Emporer knoweth them that are His."
Within days twenty-thousand were put to the sword irrespective of rank, age or gender. After the slaughter Ammal was joined by three Inquisitors who apologised for their lateness. They had detoured via, Pithos, the home planet of Pandora's Lost Souls and were heralds of bad news, Pandora had walked into a trap and the entire populace of the planet and the Chapter had turned to Chaos in a matter of days.

On the other hand they were deeply impressed with what Ammal had done in Béziers underhive. They proclaimed him 'the Evangelist' and commissioned him a large Battle Cruiser(Temple) with which he could go forth in the name of the Emperor. With Ammal and his men in a state of mourning he accepted and they took some much needed rest in the upper spires of Béziers. When the Cruiser was ready he and his men(now bulked out with some of Ammal's converted citizens) set forth under the banner of 'Ammal's Apostles.' They use the infamous words he had uttered months earlier as their motto, 'Caedite eos. Novit enim Dominus qui sunt eius,' to strike fear into the enemies of the Emperor.



Thanks if you decided to read it!

For a chapter to go randomly renegade is suspicious...
The Inqusitors would suspect the Chaplain as well.
Flesh out the reason they went renegade a bit more...
For a hive city there aren't that many people saved or killed, maybe increase the numbers by a bit.
Are the survivors going to try and rebuild the chapter or simply go on a deathquest?

Hmmm, really good points, let me have a think and i'll get back to you. Thanks for helping out!

I like how you are trying to pull it together with a background for you Chaos army, but I cant escape the thought that if the entire chapter plunged into Chaos in a matter of days, why they would not suspect such a high ranked member of said chapter?

If it was me, and knowing how ancient and powerful the forces of chaos can be. I would fear the planet had been host to chaos for a long time, and deem the entire chapter and all its detachments as hostile and engage them accordingly.

But perhaps that's why I'm not leading some Genehanced crusade across the galaxy..............

You could always kill off all but one Inquisitor with a Chaos ambush meant for the Chaplain and the last Inq. left (and the youngest) witnesses the chaplain down a powerful daemon with only his faith and his crozius...
That'd convince me...

Agreed, there has to be some level of proving himself I think.

Yeh i definitely agree with you both. If i was the Inquisitor in charge i would have him sentenced before you can say 'In the Emperor's name!'

Okay i'll alter the story to include some form of demonstration of his divinity and loyalty and get back to you.

Okay, so i'm working on a much longer and better version of the story but it will take a few days. I need to sleep so here is what i have so far.



The Béziers Crusade
The Inquisitorial Béziers Crusade concerns a small ternary system named Gaia on the northern spiral arm of the galaxy.

Gaia
The seventeen planets orbiting in the system are populated by Imperial citizens. The smallest planet, a now desolate rock also named Gaia, is entirely covered in giant hive cities that stretch far above the toxic clouds. The largest planet in the star system, Titan, has a similar acrid, dead environment to Gaia's. Titan is an industrial planet full of factories the size of countries and trillions of lives that know only the drudgery of work. The other notable body in orbit of the stars called, The Three Sisters, is a man made planet. Akin to a space hulk, the ternary system's defence can remain mobilised and prepared on Damocles. The incredible populace of these three planetary bodies means that the fourteen other planets are solely tasked with providing for the star system and still many items must be sourced from nearby Imperial systems.

The Lost Souls
The defence of Gaia consists of a small Space Marine Chapter called The Lost Souls, colloquially, Pandora's Lost Souls and a small territorial fleet of part time Imperial Guardsmen who fight alongside the Marines. The Chapter is led by Chapter Master Pandora and Captain Titan using Damocles as a base of operations.

Inquisitor Stearne
During a basic reconnaissance mission to Gaia's outskirts Chapter Master Pandora received word of an Imperial message that he was to personally collect back on Damocles. Sensing that he should not delay, Pandora had his cruiser rerouted and was soon in holographic conference with an Ordo Hereticus Inquisitor named Stearne. Inquisitor Stearne was extremely aggressive and scathing in his attitude to Pandora and he had every right. Stearne had received word from multiple Rogue Traders that they would know longer enter The Three Sister Star System due to strong rumours of underhive heresy on planet Gaia. The Inquisitor was on his way to investigate and ordered Pandora to meet him personally and escort him to Damocles. The Chapter Master, ashamed and embarrassed, made arrangements for a large contingent of the fleet to move out but ordered his Head Chaplain, Ammal, to take some Marines and investigate the rumours.

Sorry i've had a touch of 'writers block!' I promise i will have a bash at finishing this tomorrow!!

The Béziers Crusade
Gaia
The Inquisitorial Béziers Crusade concerns a small ternary system named Gaia on the northern spiral arm of the galaxy. The seventeen planets orbiting in the system are populated by Imperial citizens. The smallest planet, a now desolate rock also named Gaia, is entirely covered in giant hive cities that stretch far above the toxic clouds. The largest planet in the star system, Kanban, has a similar acrid, dead environment to Gaia's. Kanban is an industrial planet full of factories the size of countries and trillions of lives that know only the drudgery of work. The other notable body in orbit of the stars called, The Three Sisters, is a man made planet. Akin to a space hulk, Damocles allows the ternary system's defence to remain mobilised and prepared. The incredible populace of these three planetary bodies means that the fourteen other planets are solely tasked with providing for the star system but still many items must be sourced from nearby Imperial systems.

Lost Souls
The defence of Gaia consists of a small Space Marine Chapter called The Lost Souls, or, Pandora's Lost Souls and a small territorial fleet of part time Imperial Guardsmen who fight alongside the Marines. The Chapter is led by Chapter Master Pandora and Captain Titan using Damocles as a base of operations.

Stearne
During a basic reconnaissance mission to Gaia's outskirts Chapter Master Pandora received word of an Imperial message that he was to personally collect back on Damocles. Sensing that he should not delay, Pandora had his cruiser rerouted and was soon in holographic conference with an Ordo Hereticus Inquisitor named Stearne. Inquisitor Stearne was extremely aggressive and scathing in his attitude to Pandora and he had every right. Stearne had received word from multiple Rogue Traders that they would know longer enter The Three Sister Star System due to strong rumours of underhive heresy on planet Gaia. The Inquisitor was on his way to investigate and ordered Pandora to meet him personally and escort him to Damocles. The Chapter Master, ashamed and embarrassed, made arrangements for a large contingent of the fleet to move out but ordered his Head Chaplain, Ammal, to take some Marines and investigate the rumours.

Counsel
On arrival at planet Gaia, Chaplain Ammal docked his shuttle and boarded the highest spire of the Hive City Béziers. With him he brought; four Marines from his personal guard; a Scout Sergeant called Gabe, who was a close friend; and all four Scouts under Gabe's command. The group were escorted to a large chamber where many of the highest ranking dignitaries of the planet had assembled. Before Ammal and Gabe entered the chamber they gave orders for the Marines to take up guard duty around the room and for the Scouts to infiltrate the nearby populace and dig for information. As Ammal entered the room, around fifty dignitaries fell into silence and turned their gazes onto the two newcomers. The next day was wasted mainly on bureaucracy and paperwork with many heated discussions flaring up. By the time all the necessary decisions were reached and the correct paperwork signed, Pandora and Stearne had almost arrived at Gaia. With the meeting adjourned for the time being there was just enough time for Ammal and Gabe to meet with the Scouts who had sourced information from the civilians. Where the counsel of dignitaries had only been aware of Stearne's report and some rumours of heretical beliefs in the underhive; the four Scouts were able to source many names of possible ringleaders and found that the heresy was contained to approximately the three-hundred-and-thirty lowest levels of the underhive. The most important piece of information acquired was that the ringleaders may have preparations underway to summon a demon!

Waiting
Well rested and ready for whatever the enemies of the Imperium had to throw at them, Stearne, Pandora, Ammal, Gabe and now Titan met in the large chamber that had been used the previous day. It didn't take long to outline an action plan and after a few hours the room fell into silence. Stearne sat alone looking thoughtful and troubled as the huge Chapter Master paced aggressively up and down the main walkway muttering loudly. He bore the look of a man embarrassed, furious and willing to prove himself. Gabe felt out of place in this room of high ranking men and it showed. He sat on a chair in a corner of the room near a door. If Ammal hadn't requested he be included in the logistical planning and execution personally then he would have excused himself. The Chaplain knelt in the middle of the room facing a large Imperial Eagle on the wall, deep in prayer or contemplation. The newcomer, the great Captain Titan, was a vision of supreme majesty. He attentively stood near Pandora but he was much larger, in fact, he was much larger than most Space Marines, and more graceful too. His pose was one of a soldier under inspection yet he seemed to be the only one unaffected by the tension in the room. Pandora's muttering finally got the better of the Inquisitor and he slammed his fist on the table. The already uncomfortable Gabe jumped from his seat to attention, Pandora stopped dead and the playful grin that had been on Titan's face dropped. Ammal opened his eyes slowly but did not flinch. It was time.

Logistics
Ammal's valued counsel with his superiors had granted the Scout Sergeant a very large amount of responsibility in the Crusade. Gabe was given control of all the Scouts(49) in the chapter, the local Imperial Guardsmen(3000) that could get there in time, the local law enforcement(1600) as well as Stearne's Adeptus Arbites(63) and Imperial Assassins(2). His mission was to go ahead of the other troops and use mobility, numbers and local knowledge to herd and contain the populace. With the vast number of sharpshooters under his control, Gabe was also charged with the task of eliminating all known and unknown ringleaders. The logistics of this plan were extremely complex but this is where Gabe excelled, that and marksmanship.
The part of the plan Ammal was to conduct was much simpler but carried just as much importance if not more. Ammal was charged with the lives of every Lost Soul Chaplain(13) and every preacher Stearne(4) and the Imperial Guard(25) could muster. On top of this, the Head Chaplain, was aided by the Inquisitor's Sisters of Battle(87) for support. With a total of 42 Spiritual Leaders, Ammal's mission was to preach The Emperor's word to the herded civilians face to face and via a comm link. The comm link was networked to the Hive Announcement Speakers all over the underhive, many of which were still working. The link allowed Ammal to constantly fill the underhive with the amplified sound of his booming voice. This mission had great importance, there were five-hundred levels of underhive which had been condemned meaning around three-million lives to be destroyed. Every life that could be saved would be another life in service to The Emperor.
Pandora, Titan and Stearne each took 200 of the 600 Lost Soul Space Marines. Each of the three leaders would lead the forces separately but to the same ends. The Marine's duty was simply to remove the condemned populace using a large repertoire of tactics including the tactical bombing of large areas and, of course, brute force.


More soon!! Comments would be greatly appreciated. Peace out.

I'm not rly an expert on the Warhammer 40k "fluff", but this sounds good according to me

Thanks very much pal! I'll add some more soon, keep an eye out for updates.