The other day I wondered into my local GW store on my lunch break. Now this is my local store and Im well known there by all staff and most of the regulars. Im used to being greated on a first name basis and I normally have many long chats about the hobby or life in general with the staffers whom I generally make an effort to get to know.

This time however the stores new manager was there and this was the first time we had ever met. As I perused the cabniet he wondered over and said "Hello Sir, how can I help you."

Now I was immediately taken aback by this, Sir? When someone calls me Sir its normally because im being brown nosed because somone wants to pursuade me to by a TV or ungrade my phone contract, in fact when somone calls me Sir I generally go on the defensive and distrust their motives.

As a result I muttered "just browsing" and wandered off. I was shocked at even myself afterwards as this was my standard reflex action when being asked this question when in Dixons or PC world or almost any store other than a GW.

In GW when a staffer approaches me I generally expect a friendly conversation, on equal terms, with a fellow hobbist. In fact I generally find I respond better to this (in terms of wanting to buy stuff) as Im more likley to influenced by my peers than by a salesman.

Now Im an ex GW staffer myself, never in a million years would I have dreamt of calling somone Sir. One of the "10 Commandments" of being a staffer was to 'establish a rapport with a customer' personally I couldn’t see how its possible to estabish a rapport when your not talking to the cutomer as an equal.

I'm not saying I wants to be called 'mate' by a new staffer but a simple friendly "Hey there" or "Hi, hows its going" is fine and is more likley to get a friendly response out of me. I just think 'Sir' gives out the wrong message and makes me feel like Ive wandered into just another shop.

Someone in a sales position called you sir and you're upset?

Really?

Really really?

What would you prefer he call you on his first EVER encounter with you?

Relax, he did nothing wrong. He was doing his job and was trying to be respectful. There's no need for you to blow it out of proportion.

Definitely respectful. Don't be so sensitive. GW Staff should be considered beneath you.

Respectful...definitely respectful.

Part and parcel of establishing a rapport with someone is the gaining of their trust, not just assuming it. You start off addressing them as Sir or Madam, as it is a default level of politeness. Most are happy to offer you their preferred salutation (call me Ross, for example) but some prefer to maintain the purely courteous one, which is fine.

A rapport does not need to be buddy-buddy, as just understanding the needs and expectations of your client. When I worked for them, the nightmare was when a Granny or somesuch came in, and told you 'he plays Orcs' Well then, thats one in three chance of flogging summat useful. What we often did, was offer the phone so they could phone someone more in the know (Parent) who can give a bit more. Rapport established, trust earnt!

A simple "Hello There" or Hi, hows it going?" is fine.

I dont beleive GW staff are beneath me, I consider them fellow hobbists. Ones who unfortunatly earn minumum wage. Like I said Im an ex-staffer and one of the biggest annoyances were the hobbyists with superiority complexes.

A freindly greeting will get a freindly response. Grovel to me and I'll back off and back off quickly.

Perhaps its just me but I do generaly respond better to a 'buddy-buddy' aproach.

Mad Doc Grotsnik wrote:

A rapport does not need to be buddy-buddy, as just understanding the needs and expectations of your client. When I worked for them, the nightmare was when a Granny or somesuch came in, and told you 'he plays Orcs' Well then, thats one in three chance of flogging summat useful. What we often did, was offer the phone so they could phone someone more in the know (Parent) who can give a bit more. Rapport established, trust earnt!

Actually MD I can totaly see what you mean in this situation and I do admit a more formal attitude is appropriate when dealing with a parents as opposed to hobbyist.

Maybe thats it's, I suppose now Ive finally reached 30 im at the age where I could be a hobbyist or I could just be buying 'Space Rangers' for my young son (not that I have kids) and the manager was just hedging his bets. Still it made me feel old :(

LuciusAR wrote:

Like I said Im an ex-staffer and one of the biggest annoyances were the hobbyists with superiority complexes.

How is he supposed to know this?

He used the most common greeting one employs when trying to show respect to the customer. You know, so the customer does this weird thing called "buying stuff"?

Stop being so sensitive and get over it already. This really didn't warrant a post on Dakka, or anywhere for that matter.

Growing up in the southern US, it's a reflex for me to call anyone older then me "sir" or "ma'am" when meeting them. Especially in a sales situation.

It's just being respectful.

I suspect that if you had introduced yourself, and told him you were an ex-staffer yourself, the "sir" would have disappeared quickly. And he'd probably remember you better the next time you came into the store and greet you by name (which you indicate you prefer).

Whereas in Britain, the term Ma'am (with a drawn out, soft a, rather as is warm) is reserved only for the nobility! MAdam is the appropriate greeting over here.

And it's our bloody language, which means I'm afraid you are in the wrong...

Sir was more than adequate. As someone said, it is a universal approach and one you should not take offense to. To state it simply, you need to relax. That is unless you are a woman who expects him to know your thoughts and read your mind. 99% of other people wouldn't even think twice about this. How do you expect someone you have never met to know exactly how you want to be greated?

If you want a buddy-buddy approach - go see a used car salesman. Ultimately, you should have far bigger things to worry about.

Inquisitor_Malice wrote:Sir was more than adequate. As someone said, it is a universal approach and one you should not take offense to. To state it simply, you need to relax. That is unless you are a woman who expects him to know your thoughts and read your mind. 99% of other people wouldn't even think twice about this. How do you expect someone you have never met to know exactly how you want to be greated?

If you want a buddy-buddy approach - go see a used car salesman. Ultimately, you should have far bigger things to worry about.

Methinks if the OP was a woman, being called sir would be the only justifiable reason for all the rage in his post.

Mad Doc Grotsnik wrote:Whereas in Britain, the term Ma'am (with a drawn out, soft a, rather as is warm) is reserved only for the nobility! MAdam is the appropriate greeting over here.

You call a woman "Madam" over here and you'll probably get slapped in the face because she'll think you think she's the owner of a brothel. YMMV in the north

Mad Doc Grotsnik wrote:And it's our bloody language, which means I'm afraid you are in the wrong...

Luckily for us, we kicked you out a couple hundred years ago (with the help of France and a whole sh*tload of other things which had nothing to do with the American colonies ) and as a result we get to butcher the language as much as we want.

How old are you? If you are 20-something, annoying. Although note I am not a brit, simply a humble hardworking Canadian lad. If you are 30 or so you must be doing something right.

I don't like being called sir because it is stained with a thin slick of class oil over here and we like to think we're all equal.

I only get really annoyed when I ask them to stop calling me sir and they respond with 'we've been told to say it.'

It also goes to that Brit fear of falseness, if a woman behind the counter wishes you a good day, she has to mean it, dammitall, and that's unlikely if you're the 500th person she's said it too or she's on automatic mode.

Neither is wrong. What you're used to, I guess.

'Sir' is a customary greeting given to people who you are giving any sort of service to. You'll find it everywhere with manners.

Definately respectful.

~sA

Heh heh. No one ever calls me sir. I reckon it's uncommon over here. I'd take it in my stride if they did though.
Generally we don't attach any honorific to greetings or questions. Instead of "Can I help you, sir?" it's just "Can I help you?"
Unless you're dealing with a traveller of course. Then it's "Howsagoin' Boss? Canna help ya, Boss?"

My local GW (Southampton and Winchester) staff give you a friendly "hello" and "what are you in for today?", before going back to their pet project at the painting table. No hassling and the option of conversation if you want it. Just the way it should be.

@budro - You may have won the war, but who won all the battles?

LuciusAR wrote:

Now Im an ex GW staffer myself, never in a million years would I have dreamt of calling somone Sir. One of the "10 Commandments" of being a staffer was to 'establish a rapport with a customer' personally I couldn’t see how its possible to estabish a rapport when your not talking to the cutomer as an equal.

I'm not saying I wants to be called 'mate' by a new staffer but a simple friendly "Hey there" or "Hi, hows its going" is fine and is more likley to get a friendly response out of me. I just think 'Sir' gives out the wrong message and makes me feel like Ive wandered into just another shop.

Lucious, perhaps it's different in the UK but (prior GW staff US here) we were always told to use Sir or Ma'am when adressing someone for the first time here in the US. Of course, as soon as possible, we'd ask their name and give them ours (even though it was prominantly displayed on the name badge). I was under the impression that Sir was reserved for those who had achieved knighthood and considered very honorable in the UK. Perhaps I'm wrong, but I think you are being a bit supersensitive.

Building rapport, as someone mentioned isn't just making friends, it's also finding the needs and interests of the hobbyist (you) and in the process of doing so, one can usually build a relationship of mutual trust, you trust the staffer not to pester you everyday with all the new goodies, and the staffer trusts you not to get bent outa shape when he forgets your name.. (sorry, couldn't resist).. Remember as a former staffer, you should know how difficult it is to be in his shoes, trying hard to make sure everyone is being helped.. Don't be that beligerant customer that used to work there and expects everyone to know how to do it, but doesn't bother to tell anyone what he really wants.

A simple, "hey mate, thanks for offering, my name is ______, I'd prefer if you don't call me sir, it makes me uncomfortable. " would go a long way to help the staffer and you build rapport. it would also break the ice and get you and the staff on a mutually friendly encounter.

You're moaning and whining about someone being respectful to you.

Sir or ma'am is polite. If you have an aversion to sir, please follow the following script:

"Oh, please don't call me "sir". My name is _____. What's your name?"

It's a salesman's job to be polite and courteous so you feel comfortable enough to buy stuff. I forget the comedian who said it, but here goes:

"Ladies, if we say something that can be taken in two ways, one of them offensive, the other not, WE MEANT THE OTHER WAY!"

Just substitue "Customers" for "Ladies" in this case.

Disrespectfull? I'd quite like it if they said Sir at the end of every sentence, in a childish cockney accent preferably.

Back when I used to play magic my play group and I used to call everyone we played 'sir'. This both at times annoyed our opponents and kept them slightly off guard. Calling a 12 year old kid sir the entire game will seem odd to him. We also called people 'champ' to mess with them when they tried to make plays. It's a very good tactic.

I've started doing it in 40k as well and it's mainly to annoy. So yes I feel that calling someone 'sir' is annoying. But then again I call a lot of people at work sir until they tell me to call them something different.

Maybe you should tell him to call you Champ next time you come.

And @ budro, I have to deal with that southern sentiment too. Being raised down here for better or worse has warped me a little. When I worked in retail they told me to use my southern accent. I find myself doing it at my job now too, but those people don't really know what's going on. Probably comforting if I use the accent and vernacular.

To quote Staff Sergeant Register, "Don't call me sir, I work for a living."

Sir, 'Sir' is a subservient word surviving from the surly days in old Serbia, when certain serfs, too ignorant to remember their lord's names, yet too servile to blaspheme them, circumvented the situation by surrogating the subservient word, sir, by which I now belatedly address a certain senior cirriped, who correctly surmised that I was syrupy enough to say sir after every word I said, sir.

Ok there seems to have been a bit of a misunderstanding here, I'm not moaning or whinging about being called Sir. It was just an observation really. Mainly due to the fact that I pnoticed that I reacted differently to being called Sir then I would have done from a more informal greeting.

In my case I noticed that my reaction was largely negative. As one of the earlier posters says maybe it is class thing. I detest snooty middle class wannabees who treat shop assistants as dirt so perhaps I see the 2 as being connected. I was really just wondering if others thought the same as me. I'm not in anyway making a complaint and I'm sure that as I get to know the new manager we'll end up on a first name basis.

I have to agree with those who think the OP was being a wee bit over-sensitive, though I can understand why.

The person meant it in a respectful manner - because he doesn't 'know' you like the rest of the staff 'knows' you (at least not at the point it happened). It's quite common, especially in a retail environment, to begin with 'sir/ma'am', and then move onto a first-name basis when the customer signals/indicates that it's ok to do so. In retail, you and the customer are not 'equals' in a business-sense: the customer has something the retailer wants (money), while the retailer might have something the customer wants. The business is there to serve the customer, not the other way around.

After a stint in the military, and then 10 or so years in retail myself, I still use the title in everyday life without even really thinking about it - hell, I even call the guy at the McDonald's counter "sir", and the cashier at Wal-Mart "ma'am". In my opinion, it's more of a simple show of polite respect, rather than an indication of rank or title.

Just my 2 coppers, tho.

I'm with Mort completely. I did six years in the military as an officer and I habitually address people as sir. I think it's a sign of respect until I know their name.

Bunker wrote:Methinks if the OP was a woman, being called sir would be the only justifiable reason for all the rage in his post.

LOL - so true.

I can actually really understand your situation Lucius, on two levels.

The first is that I have issues with sales people. Not that I think they are bad human beings; I used to be one for a bit, at RadioShack where they require you to go up and help people and sell them things because you work on commission, no less. Part of it is that I am not entirely comfortable pretending to be interested in talking with people, and often times just want them to leave me alone so I can find I what I am looking for and go home. My problem, not theirs at all.
However, there is a nice, polite way of doing the helpful sales associate thing, and then there is the irritating puppy pawing at your leg king of way, and unfortunately most pick the latter method. I have to admit that I have had the "I am fine, please go away" sort of response hardwired into me pretty strongly, and I find any sort of standard sales conversation off putting unless I have steeled myself for the interaction ahead of time.

The second, and probably much more interesting, reason is psychological. You said you had a very friendly, and in most cases personal relationship with the staffers. So much so that they are not staffers, but friends to you. However, this fellow, instead of treating you like you were buddies, treated you like just another customer.
The reason you were bothered is because of something called "disaffirmation." Essentially you were expecting a level of rapport or closeness of relationship, and he was treating you with what seemed to you an "arm's length" sort of manner. Since you were expecting a very different sort of treatment, you got yanked into a different sort of interaction, and it threw you off balance.

For a similar case, imagine if your girlfriend/boyfriend suddenly started acting like someone at work you are not close with. Perfectly polite and respectful, but distant and not inclined to grab your butt when you are bent over in the fridge or something. It would creep you out and make you think something was really wrong.
Alternately, imagine the waitress at a restaurant giving you a peck on the cheek along with your check. Even assuming your girlfriend wasn't there to get pissed with you, it would be a wierd sort of thing, even though it might not be if you were really close friends.

Once they know you, they'll know what to call you.

It's like when some people greet each other, and the first words out of their
mouths as they hug are "Mother !!!"

Sometimes you wanna go where everybody knows your name...

Being from the Southern USA, I consider it disrespectful if someone doesn't say it(unless it's a casual acquaintance).

I don't think it's that big of a deal, but if the underlying reason for him calling you Sir was to butter you up and sell you something, then I think you have a legitimate complaint. I can't stand walking into a GW and having the staffers sell you the new unit of minis. It's hard to find a polite way to tell them to blow it out their ass

When I sold televisions to people I said sir. People tend to think you're trying to buddy up to them if you go in too casually in my opinion.

I now call my friends sir ironically because it amuses me.

brado wrote:I don't think it's that big of a deal, but if the underlying reason for him calling you Sir was to butter you up and sell you something, then I think you have a legitimate complaint. I can't stand walking into a GW and having the staffers sell you the new unit of minis. It's hard to find a polite way to tell them to blow it out their ass

Absolutely, everyone knows SALES Staff are hired to stand in the corner facing the wall, and absolutely nowhere on the contract does it state about helping the customer find the product they are looking for! Honestly. Sometimes I wonder how they expect to go bust if the staff insist on trying to be helpful!

Tcoch. Don't GW know anything

First visit, or first time, or at least until they get to know you, sure, sir is OK.

Course, when I told the local GW staffer that my name is Don and I really do prefer to be called that (this was to an employee who has known me for years but was calling me isr), I was told he was required to call me sir. That, IMO, is taking it a bit too far.

Get used to it. The older you get the more you'll get to be called sir. Don't worry, they'll call you "that old fart" behind your back.

Frazzled wrote:Get used to it. The older you get the more you'll get to be called sir.

Heh... the first time some teenager walked up and said 'Hey, mister, do you have the time' sort of threw me for six...

whatwhat wrote:Disrespectfull? I'd quite like it if they said Sir at the end of every sentence, in a childish cockney accent preferably.

"Please, sir, can you buy some more?"

Heh, I remember the first time I went back onto a college campus since graduation. My wife and I were driving around looking for a place to turn around (way too many 1 way streets around here) and we were thinking "This must be highschool open house or something, these kids don't look old enough to drive..."

Turns out it was just Tuesday, and we were just 26 year old hermits.

Did he say "sir" but spell it c-u-r? Otherwise I'd guess he was just a local schlub doing his best.

heres how you can tell if its disrespect or respect.

If he said "sir is there something i can help you with" this would be disrespectful

now what he said was "Hello sir. how can i help you."
thats respectful

read the 2 above witch sounds worst?

let me say it easier, if he says sir before any other word ie...hello or hi or something along those lines its Disrespectful and pushy unless he has served his country then it could be a habbit. just my 2 cents

malfred wrote:Sometimes you wanna go where everybody knows your name...

Dammit, now that song's stuck in my head...

As for "Sir" in a retail situation, salespersons are being taught more and more that customers are "guests" in their store. As a way of showing respect, sir or ma'am are the most common titles when addressing someone. Even though I can see why you responded the way you did, I wish more people would do it. Half the time I don't even receive a greeting (thanks, Circuit City!).

What always confused me was when to call a woman "Miss," or "Ma'am." For some reason they can get really bent out of shape over that.

I can see both sides of the argument here. First off, the first time someone called me sir (early 20s) it threw me for a loop (I'm already at the sir stage?!), but since then I have come to expect it. If, however, I were to go down to my local game store (my home away from home) and one of the staff called me sir, my first response would be to take offence. I spend so much time there and have gotten to know everyone there very well, so even if it was a new guy I would be taken aback. I would quickly catch myself and realize "Hey he's new and doesn't know me yet." But still, being called sir in my equivalent of "Cheers" would still leave me abit bothered.

Ok there seems to have been a bit of a misunderstanding here, I'm not moaning or whinging about being called Sir.

Actually, you kinda are. You started a topic about it on several forums even. If you can't just shrug it off and let it go then it must really be bothering you, hence the discussion.

LuciusAR wrote:A simple "Hello There" or Hi, hows it going?" is fine.

I dont beleive GW staff are beneath me, I consider them fellow hobbists. Ones who unfortunatly earn minumum wage. Like I said Im an ex-staffer and one of the biggest annoyances were the hobbyists with superiority complexes.

A freindly greeting will get a freindly response. Grovel to me and I'll back off and back off quickly.

Perhaps its just me but I do generaly respond better to a 'buddy-buddy' aproach.

I was referring to the fact that you're an EX-staffer, and making a little Socialist joke.
I'm sure any GW retail staff who works the hours I do would make more money than me anyway.

I always used to want to work at a GW store, but never lived in a city as a kid. Sort of glad I never did though... I ended up spending the years in question a little better. I know that of the various schools I've ever gone to, some expected teachers to be called 'Sir' rather than their names. However, being of an Australian disposition, it's disturbingly natural to blurt out 'G'day Mate!' in any situation. It never got me into trouble.

I think the question '...How can I help you?' as an opener is a little more presumptuous in a GW store, but it may have just been a bad habit on the employee's behalf. Much like most people's habits of ignoring intrusive salespeople with a shuffling mumble. I imagine most forms of retail training drill that to into you, but I've never experienced it myself. Cut it down to, 'Can I help you?' and it's neutral again. It's even a platform for conversation... I mean, people the world over say, 'How are you?' as a greeting and don't answer it in reply. It's weird, but just one of the ways communication has mutated.

Some people aren't confident enough for the buddy-buddy approach, and can only manage to display confidence through a facade of professionalism. The best way to catch that is when they apply the wrong professional stance. The thing about professionalism, though, is that it only really needs to be applied to surly or unconfident customers in the first place.

I'm guessing a lot of this is cross atlantic cultural differences. Here in the states it's very common for sales staff to call customers sir or ma'am. It was one of the first things I was taught in retail, and while it was a bit jarring to here it as I aged, I got used to it in a hurry. It's also far more common in the south, where I was visibly shocked to find the 70 year old Chick Fil A greeter holding the door for me and calling me sir. It wierded me out a bit.

I think in the UK the actual class issues are far more prevalent, and so everybody tries harder to pretend they are aren't there. In a store in the US, every salesman treats every customer with respect, regardless of each persons class because everybody's coin is good, and people like to feel waited on. I think the UK, where there is an honest to god nobility, it might be a lot more odd to, as we put it, "treat the customer like a king."

Nothing pisses me off more then being called 'Sir'

Mainly because I'm female -.-

Cyporiean wrote:Nothing pisses me off more then being called 'Sir'

Mainly because I'm female -.-

...you know if that happens a lot I'd be kinda worried.

I know Sir or Mr. Kline is respectful, but I hate hate HATE it when people call me that. It just makes me feel old :( I don't wanna be a Sir or Mister till I'm like 60

I'm amazed that this post is still going on.

Yeah, I think its an American thing.

An American once asked me for directions, and after every sentence he said 'Yes sir'.
Kinda weirded me out. In Ireland, no one wants to be called sir lest people think you were trying to put yourself above everyone else. But I guess that in America it doesn't have implication.

But then in Ireland we are a very first-name based culture, even in business meetings, etc everyone is on a first name basis.

It could have been worse they could have just pointed
and laughed!
Take into account he was new to the job so he's still
finding his feet.If you ask him nicely he'll probably
call you whatever you want next time!

damn straight it pisses me off

I didn't spend 5 years at evil medical school to be called "sir" (or Mr, I ain't no surgeon)

If someone calls you "Sir" does not equate a disparity in power or status. If you think that anyone who calls you "Sir" actually thinks you are in any way "better" than them, you are simply deluding yourself. It is a formal show of respect, a way of talking to someone whom you do not have a casual relationship with.

The first time I was called "Sir" was at Harrod's, whilst purchasing a quantity of fudge. For the price I was paying, it felt apt...

Or, as Homer J. Simpson so fondly said, "For once I'd like to be addressed as Sir, without adding 'you're making a scene.'"

nikeforever22 wrote:For once I'd like to be addressed as Sir, without adding 'you're making a scene.'

Winner, thread over.

meh, In a store I prefer not to be addressed at all, unless I know the person already or if I ask a sales question or I get a casual greeting
like: "Hello, let me know if you need anything."
other than that, I'd rather not have anyone bother me while I shop.

especially if it's a GW staffer,
I HATE the way their trained, with a fiery passion.
and the GW voice.... RAGE!
last time I was in a GW store (*shall be unnamed*) I 'saw' the sales associate's GW-voice and 'raised' him a few decibels until he got the hint and broke character
(I even gave him the old "Which army do you play." interrogation.)
...

anyway, the only time I call someone "sir" is sarcastically, disrespectfully or if they have a gun (which they didn't take so well at the time).
but, I'm not really traditionally socialized anyhow... so I'll stay away from Texas

Mad Doc Grotsnik wrote:MAdam is the appropriate greeting over here.

Over here, a 'Madam' gets you a happy ending...


Ghidorah

BoxANT wrote:If someone calls you "Sir" does not equate a disparity in power or status. If you think that anyone who calls you "Sir" actually thinks you are in any way "better" than them, you are simply deluding yourself. It is a formal show of respect, a way of talking to someone whom you do not have a casual relationship with.

I think you're missing the point and a lot of history.

No one calls anyone else Sir and we all get along just fine.
Though that is diminishing a little with all the rest of the americanisation going on (or should i say americanization).

I am from the Southern USA too - but I am also old, and being called sir really annoys the heck out of me! Dirty filthy little whippersnappers....

It doesn't happen quite so much if Iwear a baseball cap....

Thanatos_elNyx wrote:

BoxANT wrote:If someone calls you "Sir" does not equate a disparity in power or status. If you think that anyone who calls you "Sir" actually thinks you are in any way "better" than them, you are simply deluding yourself. It is a formal show of respect, a way of talking to someone whom you do not have a casual relationship with.

No one calls anyone else Sir and we all get along just fine.

Until someone is so bothered by being treated in a familiar manner the first time they walk into a store they go whinging across multiple boards about it. :S

This thread appears to be the Dakka equivelant of a slow news day.

this is a post about a guy being overly sensitive on being called sir. the perfect thread!. jesus christ....

Thanatos_elNyx wrote:

BoxANT wrote:If someone calls you "Sir" does not equate a disparity in power or status. If you think that anyone who calls you "Sir" actually thinks you are in any way "better" than them, you are simply deluding yourself. It is a formal show of respect, a way of talking to someone whom you do not have a casual relationship with.

I think you're missing the point and a lot of history.

No one calls anyone else Sir and we all get along just fine.
Though that is diminishing a little with all the rest of the americanisation going on (or should i say americanization).

Yes, our evil American plan to unstable the UK by getting people to address others with "Sir", "thank you", and "you are welcome".


This is a personal problem, you have the right not to be injured or assaulted. However, being made uncomfortable (by being called "Sir" of all things ) is something that people may just have to live with (granted it could work different in a nanny state).

I hate being called sir so I know the feeling, more likely then not when some one calls me sir I just walk away and ignore them.

It just annoys me because we both know they don't mean it in a respectful way, there just trying to sell me something and are willing to bs out there teeth to do it.

Aha, I guess that shows what you know. Too bad we can't all be psychic like you, to know exactly what's in other people's heads. The walking away bit is good though, since I use 'sir' most often when walking through crowded places, and say, 'scuse me, sir' if there's a guy in my way.

Of course, the best part about the 'ignore them and walk away' response is one day you'll be transporting a whole bunch of personal explosives, and some helpful fellow is going to shout, 'Sir! Sir! You dropped the pin from one of your-!' but since you're just ignoring him and walking away... BOOM!

Too bad we can't all be psychic like you

The word you're looking for is "psychotic", that's what you are if you take personal offense to being addressed respectfully and ignore that person. In my "humble" opinion, anyway.

My friends and I started using the word "sir" a lot about 5 years ago. We felt it was a forgotten word around here plus its kinda funny to us to say it all the time. Keep in mind we started using "Sir" in our early 20s and still do, not really due to it being respectful but because its something no one says any more and its just so odd hearing it all the time.

That all said, "Sir" has a great dark side. For whatever reason, it turns certain people into mindless crazy machines. Let me list you what actually happened to me just by using the word sir. I will also say that I never tried to be annoying or just say the word like crazy. I just use it as a greeting and just about everyone of these came without warning.

1> Screamed at for 10 mins by someone at the top of the lungs until their face was pure red.
2> Kicked out of college class after the teacher got sick of me calling sir just about every day.
3> Was refused service at McDonald's by one employee
4> Multiple life threats
5> Thrown out of my friend's house by his dad
6> Kicked out of a DnD group
7> Recieved complains at work that calling people sir and ma'am is rude

Even with all that said, I still use "Sir" because for every prick that cries there are a hundred that think its great that I use that word.

See, what'd I tell you? Psychotic!

Seriously though, that's crazy...and you weren't saying it to deliberately piss anyone off or in a sarcastic/mocking tone?

When I am faced with this situation, I tend to do the following.

"Hello sir, is there any way I can help you?"

(I turn, hold out my hand and say)

" Not at the moment thank you, I'm Nathan"

(then the conversation usually goes like this)

"Er.... um.. i'm (befuddled employee's name here) nice to meet you" and then they walk off hurriedly, while I go back to minding my own business.

On rare occasions, I meet someone who is cool enough, and quick enough, to change salesman strategies to a more casual, affable diction. We talk, and then I buy something. Eventually everyone in the store knows my name, and gaming ensues.

Then again.. this isn't in any GW stores, only a few FLGS's... but hey.. it might work.

SirRouga wrote:My friends and I started using the word "sir" a lot about 5 years ago. We felt it was a forgotten word around here plus its kinda funny to us to say it all the time. Keep in mind we started using "Sir" in our early 20s and still do, not really due to it being respectful but because its something no one says any more and its just so odd hearing it all the time.

That all said, "Sir" has a great dark side. For whatever reason, it turns certain people into mindless crazy machines. Let me list you what actually happened to me just by using the word sir. I will also say that I never tried to be annoying or just say the word like crazy. I just use it as a greeting and just about everyone of these came without warning.

1> Screamed at for 10 mins by someone at the top of the lungs until their face was pure red.
2> Kicked out of college class after the teacher got sick of me calling sir just about every day.
3> Was refused service at McDonald's by one employee
4> Multiple life threats
5> Thrown out of my friend's house by his dad
6> Kicked out of a DnD group
7> Recieved complains at work that calling people sir and ma'am is rude

Even with all that said, I still use "Sir" because for every prick that cries there are a hundred that think its great that I use that word.

good stuff btw

SirRouga wrote:My friends and I started using the word "sir" a lot about 5 years ago. We felt it was a forgotten word around here plus its kinda funny to us to say it all the time. Keep in mind we started using "Sir" in our early 20s and still do, not really due to it being respectful but because its something no one says any more and its just so odd hearing it all the time.

That all said, "Sir" has a great dark side. For whatever reason, it turns certain people into mindless crazy machines. Let me list you what actually happened to me just by using the word sir. I will also say that I never tried to be annoying or just say the word like crazy. I just use it as a greeting and just about everyone of these came without warning.

1> Screamed at for 10 mins by someone at the top of the lungs until their face was pure red.
2> Kicked out of college class after the teacher got sick of me calling sir just about every day.
3> Was refused service at McDonald's by one employee
4> Multiple life threats
5> Thrown out of my friend's house by his dad
6> Kicked out of a DnD group
7> Recieved complains at work that calling people sir and ma'am is rude

Even with all that said, I still use "Sir" because for every prick that cries there are a hundred that think its great that I use that word.

Number six is actually a good thing.

Shrike78 wrote:When I am faced with this situation, I tend to do the following.

"Hello sir, is there any way I can help you?"

(I turn, hold out my hand and say)

" Not at the moment thank you, I'm Nathan"

(then the conversation usually goes like this)

"Er.... um.. i'm (befuddled employee's name here) nice to meet you" and then they walk off hurriedly, while I go back to minding my own business.

On rare occasions, I meet someone who is cool enough, and quick enough, to change salesman strategies to a more casual, affable diction. We talk, and then I buy something. Eventually everyone in the store knows my name, and gaming ensues.

Then again.. this isn't in any GW stores, only a few FLGS's... but hey.. it might work.

This.

Kanluwen wrote:

Shrike78 wrote:When I am faced with this situation, I tend to do the following.

"Hello sir, is there any way I can help you?"

(I turn, hold out my hand and say)

" Not at the moment thank you, I'm Nathan"

(then the conversation usually goes like this)

"Er.... um.. i'm (befuddled employee's name here) nice to meet you" and then they walk off hurriedly, while I go back to minding my own business.

On rare occasions, I meet someone who is cool enough, and quick enough, to change salesman strategies to a more casual, affable diction. We talk, and then I buy something. Eventually everyone in the store knows my name, and gaming ensues.

Then again.. this isn't in any GW stores, only a few FLGS's... but hey.. it might work.

This.

... sorry... what?

Multiple pages on the insult of being called sir??!!
What's next, a 4 page debate over voluntary faq's?

... what's wrong with that?

stonefox wrote:Number six is actually a good thing.

How do you figure that?

these types of insignificant threads are what dakka's made of! i like.

Agamemnon2 wrote:

stonefox wrote:Number six is actually a good thing.

How do you figure that?

Perhaps you are taking it a bit too personally?

I call Commissioned Officers, Landed Knights and Royalty, my father, and people I don't know that are older than me "sir". I don't really care personally if I'm called "sir" or not, but I usually correct people after the first time that I am not anyone's father, and I do work for a living. If you MUST stick a formality onto every sentence towards me, I accept "Sergeant" as a given.

Khestra the Unbeheld wrote:I call Commissioned Officers, Landed Knights and Royalty, my father, and people I don't know that are older than me "sir". I don't really care personally if I'm called "sir" or not, but I usually correct people after the first time that I am not anyone's father, and I do work for a living. If you MUST stick a formality onto every sentence towards me, I accept "Sergeant" as a given.

QFT

I generally reply that I've not been knighted yet and wind up with a chuckle out of it.

What in ** is wrong with the Americans in this thread being upset about being called 'sir' or 'ma'am'? It's just being used as a substitute for 'Hey, you'.

Don't you have something else to complain about?!?

You did notice that the OP is a brit, right?

Well it's better than the classic Chip Shop service.

Customer: Half a chicken and chips.
Server: There you go. Now **** off.

People don't call each other sir in the UK except for assistants in up-market clothes shops like Aquascutum. If you're spending £400 on a macintosh you want to be called sir.

Getting old is when young women offer you their seat on the tube.

Sad days. :S You'll all be there sometime, so don't laugh.

OK, shall I lock this thread?

I find it annoying. I abhor formality.

Come on guys, we can get this wreck of a thread to page 4, I know it!

Go, mods. Lock it.

They'll just find something else to complain about, anyway.

Dont mind me, On my way to page four...

I insist on being called "sir" by everyone, even close friends and family.

When people don't call me sir, I say "Call me sir, I don't work for a living!" whether or not this is actually true at the time.

::EDIT:: What is this, just the longest page 3 ever?

Crap, I was really hoping this would be the page four post... oh well.

skavenfreak wrote:Crap, I was really hoping this would be the page four post... oh well.

You shouldn't be making posts just to get onto page 4.



::EDIT:: BOOYA! PAGE FOUR!

My spam post cleverly disguised as the criticism of another spam post worked!

Ah man, I even counted the replies on the other page!!! must have missed one...

Good. Think you can get to five now?

You need at least one more post for page Five.

One time I insisted my children call me "sir." They stole my cane, glasses, and socks, and hooked up a laugh track to my hearing aid. Then they sold my socks to Malfred.
I miss my socks. But I don't want them back, not after seeing what Malfred did to them.

I get called "Sir" all the time (but then, I have 'old man' white hair), and I've never found it offensive. I, in turn have called others "sir" and "Ma'am".

OTOH, I have called people who irritate me or annoy me "Sirrah!" - and most have not got the reference.
(It's an obsolete, rather contemptuous form of address. Not as offensive as calling a black man "boy", but still rather bad).

Took a while to get used to being called 'sir', sort of happens a few years after leaving school.

These days I prefer to be refered to as 'Master'.

Master is traditionally used for young boys in the UK.

Amusingly, the word a Japanese wife (like what I've got) generally uses to refer to her husband when speaking to outsiders, means master.

te hehehe
Master Bates....

Here's hoping for 5.

Damn!

COME ON PAGE FIVE!!!

BoxANT wrote:Yes, our evil American plan to unstable the UK by getting people to address others with "Sir", "thank you", and "you are welcome".

I never said I had a problem with politeness or "Please"/"Thank You"/"You're Welcome".

Also Ireland is not in the UK. Just an FYI. (Notice how I don't raise to your flamebait/ignorance)

Its not? I thought there were British troops in norgthern Ireland? This is an informational question not a disagreement Thanny. Whats the story?

Northern Ireland, or Ulster, is part of the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland. It is currently internationally viewed as a part of UK. Eire is a separate republic and nation with her own government.

So "Ireland" we're referring to here is the southern part?

Frazzled wrote:So "Ireland" we're referring to here is the southern part?

From what I gather, when people mention Ireland(especially non-Americans), they tend to mean Southern Ireland that's not part of the UK. So, yes.

LuciusAR wrote:Being called Sir, Respectful or annoying?

I hate it.

Then again, I respect casual candor far more than tight assed, suck up Political Correctness.

But if I am a patron at a place of business, I dont mind it. Its their job and they are told to address you as such so I dont think it is meant as disrespect.

It depends on how I feel at the time.

Usually, if some idiot uses a condescening tone with his delivery of 'Can I help you, sir ?' I respond with a ' don't you bloody forget either, chum. ME spending, YOU hoping I'll spend. Beg biatch ' attitude.

If it comes across as ' I'd rather say Mate, but I was ordered to call new faces 'Sir' ' I give them a ' forget that crap, buddy, let's talk hobby' response.

If I see the suit in back giving his staffer the beady eye for asking 'New army, or expanding, mate ?' as their opening, then that's it, time to really wind the suit up, and start talking war and paint with my new bestest buddy who's forced to earn his troops.

I don't think it's annoying or like trying to lure you in to buy stuff. I sometimes get called sir by costumers when I'm the employee. I suppose it depends on the person too, and how they say it.

Honestly... dont call me Sir.... i work for a living

those of you in the military should be familiar with this little phrase from whatever basic training/boot camp/ etc. they went to.

a screaming, yelling drill sergeant goes a long way to fixing a Sir or Ma'am problem

anyways, i do not like to be called sir, as it makes me feel old (and im not! im only 22!!!)... Dude, or Bro, or something along those lines are a perfectly acceptable substitute to "sir" for me (so long as its not "pal" as thats not so nice)

do you know who else called people sir?

the NAZI'S called people sir!!!!

think about that!!!










By the way, I read all 4 pages of this thread so I can Godwyn it if i want. Work is boring today.)

Ensis Ferrae wrote:Honestly... dont call me Sir.... i work for a living

those of you in the military should be familiar with this little phrase from whatever basic training/boot camp/ etc. they went to.

a screaming, yelling drill sergeant goes a long way to fixing a Sir or Ma'am problem

When I was in Marine basic, the DI's had you start every statement to them with a sir and end it with a sir, and Heaven help you if you forgot.

Kitchen duty for a MONTH! lol

To the OP: I'm sure the 'sir' was meant as a sign of respect. It's what retail drones are supposed to do

It always throws me for a loop when someone calls me sir. I usually look behind me to see if anyone important is around as they can't possibly mean little old me.

Relapse wrote: When I was in Marine basic, the DI's had you start every statement to them with a sir and end it with a sir, and Heaven help you if you forgot.

yeah, but you know how the army loves to glorify its officers with the Sir stuff, even in basic, they want you to address NCOs as NCOs, and officers as officers... honestly, ill take 3 Specialists over 1 lieutenant any day... you'll get more use from the SPCs

I've been in GW and they call you mate or start up a conversation with "Hi guys". You're not my mate, I don't know you. NOW I SHALL PUT YOU TO THE SWORD!!!!

Well that's an exaggeration, because I wouldn't use a sword. But I can well imagine someone being annoyed or taken aback by the assumed friendliness and being approached in that manner. They aren't your 'mate', they're sales staff who are unknown to you.

On the main subject, don't be annoyed when someone calls you 'sir', they are being polite. After they approach you as 'sir', you can tell them you're a regular and swap names if you wish.

Perhaps it is coming from where I grew up, but I think that treating people with civility and, yes, a certain degree of detatchment, when introductions are being made. I believe you should *not* be casual in business relationships, or when you first meet someone. I would take excpetion to someone who I did not know calling me bro or dude or something to that effect. I really dislike anyone I don't know putting their hands on me in any fashion other than a handshake, no matter how friendly their intended gesture is.

I adress everyone who I do not know intimately as sir or ma'am. This includes everyone from business contacts to the girl at the checkout at the grocery who is probably all of 20 years of age. When I go to McDonalds I adress the person taking my order as sir or ma'am. It is a matter of respect, as it is being friendly yet maintaining each other's personal space.

Ensis Ferrae wrote:Honestly... dont call me Sir.... i work for a living

those of you in the military should be familiar with this little phrase from whatever basic training/boot camp/ etc. they went to.

a screaming, yelling drill sergeant goes a long way to fixing a Sir or Ma'am problem

anyways, i do not like to be called sir, as it makes me feel old (and im not! im only 22!!!)... Dude, or Bro, or something along those lines are a perfectly acceptable substitute to "sir" for me (so long as its not "pal" as thats not so nice)

As a counter, I am not your "bro," your "bra," your "man," or your "friend." Unless we are personal friends thats inappropriate and I will react in that manner.

I have no qualms with being called anything that is "normal" in society, respectful terms or friendly terms. If someone I don't know calls me mate it always makes me want to ask "excuse me do I know you?", but it doesn't irk me enough to moan about it.

Frazzled wrote:

Ensis Ferrae wrote:Honestly... dont call me Sir.... i work for a living

those of you in the military should be familiar with this little phrase from whatever basic training/boot camp/ etc. they went to.

a screaming, yelling drill sergeant goes a long way to fixing a Sir or Ma'am problem

anyways, i do not like to be called sir, as it makes me feel old (and im not! im only 22!!!)... Dude, or Bro, or something along those lines are a perfectly acceptable substitute to "sir" for me (so long as its not "pal" as thats not so nice)

As a counter, I am not your "bro," your "bra," your "man," or your "friend." Unless we are personal friends thats inappropriate and I will react in that manner.

You saying I don't need a Bra?

Saying I got nothing to show?

You cheeky get.

To throw on in- sir is just a nice fallback term that is polite...

calling you guy, dude, bro, my friend, even a "hey there" any of these could be the person greeting you's phrase that they use to be comfortable when greeting an unfamiliar person...



I've called guys "Sir" when I've been serving them, its just a polite thing- I call some of my friends "gitface"

which is safer for me to use to someone I don't know eh?

Wow... this thread is still going???

Relapse wrote:

Ensis Ferrae wrote:Honestly... dont call me Sir.... i work for a living

those of you in the military should be familiar with this little phrase from whatever basic training/boot camp/ etc. they went to.

a screaming, yelling drill sergeant goes a long way to fixing a Sir or Ma'am problem

When I was in Marine basic, the DI's had you start every statement to them with a sir and end it with a sir, and Heaven help you if you forgot.

And heaven help you if you referred to yourself as me or I.. In the Army, only the officers are referred to as Sir. DI's or Drill Sergeants were referred to as Drill Sergeant. And the Seals/Navy have a very nasty way to refer to officers that phonetically is sounds like Sir, but I think they spell it out C.U.R.

Frazzled wrote:Its not? I thought there were British troops in norgthern Ireland? This is an informational question not a disagreement Thanny. Whats the story?

Platuan4th is right.

Ireland can refer to the Island or the Country. But in normal conversation it refers to the country.
If necessary it can be refered to as the Republic of Ireland, but only when specifically trying to distinguish it from Northern Ireland.
Northern Ireland is part of the UK (Not so many troops there these days since the peace process), but if someone means to refer to Northern Ireland they will say Northern Ireland.

So basically saying 'Ireland is part of the UK' to an Irish person is like saying 'Are you American?' to an Canadian or 'Are you Australian?' to a New Zealander.

Ensis Ferrae wrote:yeah, but you know how the army loves to glorify its officers with the Sir stuff, even in basic, they want you to address NCOs as NCOs, and officers as officers... honestly, ill take 3 Specialists over 1 lieutenant any day... you'll get more use from the SPCs

I'd take 1 Lieutenant over anything else in any branch of the military.

But then again, I'm married to her.

Platuan4th wrote:

Ensis Ferrae wrote:yeah, but you know how the army loves to glorify its officers with the Sir stuff, even in basic, they want you to address NCOs as NCOs, and officers as officers... honestly, ill take 3 Specialists over 1 lieutenant any day... you'll get more use from the SPCs

I'd take 1 Lieutenant over anything else in any branch of the military.

But then again, I'm married to her.

It's always fun to call a female lieutenant "SIR" as officialy, that's the generic term to refer to all officers. However, with the gender equality, said females usually blow a gasket and give you the yak yak for 30 minutes on the difference between 'sir' and ma'am.. Then I remind them that ma'am is short for madam and I wasn't aware that the military was pushing brothels anymore.. That usually cuts through for about 30 seconds, then more yak yak.

two_heads_talking wrote:

Platuan4th wrote:

Ensis Ferrae wrote:yeah, but you know how the army loves to glorify its officers with the Sir stuff, even in basic, they want you to address NCOs as NCOs, and officers as officers... honestly, ill take 3 Specialists over 1 lieutenant any day... you'll get more use from the SPCs

I'd take 1 Lieutenant over anything else in any branch of the military.

But then again, I'm married to her.

It's always fun to call a female lieutenant "SIR" as officialy, that's the generic term to refer to all officers. However, with the gender equality, said females usually blow a gasket and give you the yak yak for 30 minutes on the difference between 'sir' and ma'am.. Then I remind them that ma'am is short for madam and I wasn't aware that the military was pushing brothels anymore.. That usually cuts through for about 30 seconds, then more yak yak.

She doesn't mind it, she's was born and raised an AF brat(both her parents were Enlisted/NCOs), so she's knows what's what. The funniest thing was when she was acting as a higher officer's aide for a while and had the nick name "Wonder Minion" and the NCOs kept forgetting to not call her Wonder Minion(which eventually became Wonder Minion Ma'am).

It depends, I prefer to be called by my first name by people I know. Sir is ok, when I don't know the person or they don't know me.

What I find annoying is to be called Dude, I think at 59 and on the verge of being a Senior Citizen that I have passed that phase a long time ago.

The gamers in the group where I play range in age from 18 to 59 with most of them beining in their 20's or 30's. Most of the peopel in our group either call each other by their first name or last name and a few go by their web names.

So as I started by saying it depends.

Warrior 50

lol... really thats about the extent of usefulness for a LT... "minions"

its sad really, when you see a PFC training, yes TRAINING a new LT on some task thats vital to the unit's operations...


and please, dont get me started on west point, far as im concerned there's only 1 good officer in the army currently that came from that school.

Platuan4th wrote:

She doesn't mind it, she's was born and raised an AF brat(both her parents were Enlisted/NCOs), so she's knows what's what. The funniest thing was when she was acting as a higher officer's aide for a while and had the nick name "Wonder Minion" and the NCOs kept forgetting to not call her Wonder Minion(which eventually became Wonder Minion Ma'am).

Now that's a good sport. kudos to her. Us NCOs are just trouble you know..

I will confirm what several others on this thread have stated. Here in the Southern US (especially here in Texas) we have a culture of being very friendly but polite with strangers. It's very normal to refer to any stranger as "sir" or "m'am". The only exception I make is that I will often call a woman who is obviously younger than me "Miss". I do take it a bit farther than most people, though. I regard first names as being reserved for family and friends and tend to get annoyed when a stranger such as a salesman takes to calling me "Martin" (my real first name) without asking first. But much of that probably comes from my military and law enforcement background were last names are used almost exclusively.

Of course I don't call inmates "sir"...they lost that right when they got convicted. They get refered to by their last name. But that's as much agency policy as it is personal preference. It took me a while to break the habit of calling people "sir" at work when I first went to work from the prison system years ago and caught myself calling inmates (especially older ones) "sir" quite a bit in the first few months. But peer pressure and the odd look that inmates (who are not acustomed to being refered to as such) quickly broke me of that. The inmates of course refer to me by my rank, "Mr. W-----", or "boss" (a Texas prison tradition) and I would get VERY upset if one ever used my first name.

Our airsoft group tends to refer to each other by their forum call sign. Thus when I'm out playing that game it's usually "Trench", "TR", or "Trenchie". In our WW2 reenactment group, we refer to each other by our "persona" names and rank. So out there I'm "Obergefreiter Muller".
So yeah I answer to alot of things depending on were I am!

"Trench Raider"

Ensis Ferrae wrote:lol... really thats about the extent of usefulness for a LT... "minions"

its sad really, when you see a PFC training, yes TRAINING a new LT on some task thats vital to the unit's operations...


and please, dont get me started on west point, far as im concerned there's only 1 good officer in the army currently that came from that school.

Air Force has the Academy, NOT West Point. Besides, she's ROTC, NOT Academy(don't get me started on Academy Kids), and as I said, has the benefit of being raised by 2 Enlisted, so she knows to spend her first week or so observing and not ordering to get the hang of how it's normally done.

Platuan4th wrote:
Air Force has the Academy, NOT West Point. Besides, she's ROTC, NOT Academy(don't get me started on Academy Kids), and as I said, has the benefit of being raised by 2 Enlisted, so she knows to spend her first week or so observing and not ordering to get the hang of how it's normally done.

hehe, i am in the Army, so i dont deal with Academy Kids, except for when im in the states because my current home station is Ft. Carson... right there in the same town as the Academy and i know what you mean, i think its a generalized statement to say this, but: Military Academy people are quite useless, unless you need cannon fodder (this being west point, AFA, and Navy)... the better LTs and officers come from outside influences, like ROTC, green to gold (or whatever programs the air force and navy have)



there are so many days i wish i could say, "sorry ma'am, but i dont salute west pointers" and walk a way