http://videogames.yahoo.com/events/plugged-in/lack-of-twilight-game-costing-millions-/1395758

So let's discuss what would (should?) happen with the eventual release of a Twilight videogame (if it ever does).

*Dakka Nerdrage button primed*

If it happens the nerdrage will register on Earthquake sensors.

It must have a way to kill off every freaking character from the series in some sort of horrible manner, including the author. Oh and be free!

The Twilight character death simulator!

Sparkly emo vampires, meet exploding stake launcher... Hilarity ensues!

The werewolves get to deal with the neutron-powered rolled-up newspaper. Bad doggie! Bad!

doh double post, sorry.

It would be a dating sim if one looks at the books and the target audience.

All your nerd rage just makes me stronger!

Horrible things would ensue. Not only nerdrage, but pure, simple, unadulterated RAGEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Every man, woman, child, and animal with enough sense to see Twilight for the Devil Incarnate that it is will do everything in their power to destroy the game and all copies of the book,
ensuring that future generations will only have to deal with it as a passing history lesson.

And all who read the book, saw the movie, or who were in any way involved with spreading the epidemic to others will be put to death. T

The lives lost will be catastrophic, but it is a price that we must be willing to pay to survive.

^that. I are agreeing with GES.

DEATH TO TWILIGHT!

Twilight vampires are responsible for the release of the bludanglez codex...

For this they must die!!!! (again)

Maybe they could release it as some sort of Twilight Vs. Aliens type game; then 'forget' to 'balance' the two sides Meaning we could all spend happy hours crawling along ceilings and eating vampires.

it would have to be on the DS as this is the only console the girls who would buy this game would own, i don't really see what the point of the game would be:

'you stopped yourself from having sex with a girl so you don't kill her, +10 point'

Edward gets a nasty case of chestburster

Oh god imagine the alien produced...

If the game gets released,one word:EXTREMINATUS.

isthatmycow wrote:^that. I am agreeing with GES.

DEATH TO TWILIGHT!

Sigged.

The general nerd populace would grow even more elitist and detached from any one or thing of actual consequence, including, but not limited to, female interaction, having friends who do things besides play games, having anything to talk about with someone who isn't a nerd or not living up to a stereotype they themselves perpetuate.

It isn't specifically licensed as such, but I'm sorry to say that I did see a new MMORPG in production about the battle between Werewolves and Vampires. It was called Midnight, and probably toes the lines of copyright infringement quite expertly.

^^
Sounds more like Underworld to me. That would be an awesome mmo.

Cannerus_The_Unbearable wrote:The general nerd populace would grow even more elitist and detached from any one or thing of actual consequence, including, but not limited to, female interaction, having friends who do things besides play games, having anything to talk about with someone who isn't a nerd or not living up to a stereotype they themselves perpetuate.

This. Last time I checked, nobody was being strapped to chairs and forced to watch Twilight, 'Clockwork Orange'-style. I can only assume that any computer game based on the popular Twilight franchise would operate along the same lines. Don't like it? Dont watch/read/play it.

Albatross wrote:

Cannerus_The_Unbearable wrote:The general nerd populace would grow even more elitist and detached from any one or thing of actual consequence, including, but not limited to, female interaction, having friends who do things besides play games, having anything to talk about with someone who isn't a nerd or not living up to a stereotype they themselves perpetuate.

This. Last time I checked, nobody was being strapped to chairs and forced to watch Twilight, 'Clockwork Orange'-style. I can only assume that any computer game based on the popular Twilight franchise would operate along the same lines. Don't like it? Dont watch/read/play it.

Thank you for that.

WEll, usually i would agree, but, Twilight are bads. We must purge it from our society and banish Stefanie Myers to pluto

I assume there are tons of panties twilight hasn't put in a twist. In fact they probably outnumber the lifeless weabon nerds that actually care about a tween film trilogy about vampire boys so much that I've heard more bitching about it than actual material related to the film.

Golden Eyed Scout wrote:

isthatmycow wrote:^that. I am agreeing with GES.

DEATH TO TWILIGHT!

Sigged.

The ^ is also pointing to the greatest Rommel quote ever

It has come full circle, bashing on people who bash on Twilight is now "in".

Albatross wrote:

Cannerus_The_Unbearable wrote:The general nerd populace would grow even more elitist and detached from any one or thing of actual consequence, including, but not limited to, female interaction, having friends who do things besides play games, having anything to talk about with someone who isn't a nerd or not living up to a stereotype they themselves perpetuate.

This. Last time I checked, nobody was being strapped to chairs and forced to watch Twilight, 'Clockwork Orange'-style. I can only assume that any computer game based on the popular Twilight franchise would operate along the same lines. Don't like it? Dont watch/read/play it.

I have to agree with Alba here,I don't quite get the "MURDER EVERYONE WHO LIKES TWILIGHT!!" frame of mind,sure it's a silly little film,but then it's target audience is silly little girls...if your not one,you most likely won't enjoy the films.
Now,I do admit to having my own "Twilight rage",but that was mostly due to the fact that I had no idea what I was going to see (a friend recomended it saying it was a "Great vampire movie...becuase my wife says so" ),30 minutes into the film I was like "What the feth..." , but that's the point,I saw that it was a silly piece of gak...so I don't watch it (them).

avantgarde wrote:It has come full circle, bashing on people who bash on Twilight is now "in".

Or is it that people who needlessly bitch about things to look cool has been out this whole time?

avantgarde wrote:It has come full circle, bashing on people who bash on Twilight is now "in".

Yep, nothing worse than listening to teenage nerds whining about how girls have taken over 'their' thing.

Youth is wasted on the young.

Repressing your loathing for Twilight is a necessary evil for hanging around girls nowadays.

Totally worth it.

Monster Rain wrote:Repressing your loathing for Twilight is a necessary evil for hanging around girls nowadays.

Totally worth it.

Not so sure about that,at least with the 25 and up "crowd".
Besides,most of the women I know A) Have no interest in Twilight at all -or-B) Think it's gak -or-C) have no idea what Twilight is.

Im still trying to wrap my brain around just what the hell the game would even be about. I mean honestly, what would be the point of a Twilight game? Im talking for serious right now, not "insert random joke about topic"

KingCracker wrote:Im still trying to wrap my brain around just what the hell the game would even be about. I mean honestly, what would be the point of a Twilight game? Im talking for serious right now, not "insert random joke about topic"

Honestly,it would most likely be a "Romantic/Adventure"...and belive me...it would sell.

FITZZ wrote:

Monster Rain wrote:Repressing your loathing for Twilight is a necessary evil for hanging around girls nowadays.

Totally worth it.

Not so sure about that,at least with the 25 and up "crowd".
Besides,most of the women I know A) Have no interest in Twilight at all -or-B) Think it's gak -or-C) have no idea what Twilight is.

Who's after women over 25? Just kidding.

Maybe it's a regional thing then. Practically every girl/woman I know is into it.

Otherwise well-balanced and intelligent women in their upper 20s left this very house to see the midnight showing of New Moon. *shudder*

FITZZ wrote:

KingCracker wrote:Im still trying to wrap my brain around just what the hell the game would even be about. I mean honestly, what would be the point of a Twilight game? Im talking for serious right now, not "insert random joke about topic"

Honestly,it would most likely be a "Romantic/Adventure"...and belive me...it would sell.

Oh believe me, I believe you. People buy gak just to buy gak. Thats one of those games that a parent/relative will buy the child intended just because they like the franchise.

As for the game though, romantic adventure? Ive seen some decent porns start with that in the title description

KingCracker wrote:As for the game though, romantic adventure? Ive seen some decent porns start with that in the title description

Pirates, perchance?

http://www.newgrounds.com/collection/datingsims.html

That about covers all the game will really be about.

KingCracker wrote:

FITZZ wrote:

KingCracker wrote:Im still trying to wrap my brain around just what the hell the game would even be about. I mean honestly, what would be the point of a Twilight game? Im talking for serious right now, not "insert random joke about topic"

Honestly,it would most likely be a "Romantic/Adventure"...and belive me...it would sell.

Oh believe me, I believe you. People buy gak just to buy gak. Thats one of those games that a parent/relative will buy the child intended just because they like the franchise.

As for the game though, romantic adventure? Ive seen some decent porns start with that in the title description

We must be watching the same kind of porn .

By "Romantic/Adventure" I basicly mean something along the lines of "Sparklepire goes through various levels trying to rescue girl from evil (insert spooky gak),saving her in the end".

Well no one can say we have bad taste then.


Ahhhh I see what you mean by the game now then. I was thinking the GIRL would be the main character, and I was confused how the hell that would work. I forgot there are vampires(snickers) in the movie. That would be what its about. and yea, +10 points for being able to not make out for longer then 5 seconds. That would sell I guess.

It'll probably turn out like the Desperate Housewives video game (surprise surprise!) which by all accounts is actually pretty darn good. I beleive it even got well rated, as in 70 + on PC Gamer when they reviewed it, and my friends who have played the game said it was excellent. So I would expect a similar product for the Twilight game.

Albatross wrote:

Cannerus_The_Unbearable wrote:The general nerd populace would grow even more elitist and detached from any one or thing of actual consequence, including, but not limited to, female interaction, having friends who do things besides play games, having anything to talk about with someone who isn't a nerd or not living up to a stereotype they themselves perpetuate.

This. Last time I checked, nobody was being strapped to chairs and forced to watch Twilight, 'Clockwork Orange'-style. I can only assume that any computer game based on the popular Twilight franchise would operate along the same lines. Don't like it? Dont watch/read/play it.

Didn't Twilight siege ComicCon? I'd be pretty pissed if I showed up at GenCon and there were screaming masses of Twilight fans there (granted, I hate the already existing screaming masses of fans at GenCon/Origins).

Monster Rain wrote:

FITZZ wrote:

Monster Rain wrote:Repressing your loathing for Twilight is a necessary evil for hanging around girls nowadays.

Totally worth it.

Not so sure about that,at least with the 25 and up "crowd".
Besides,most of the women I know A) Have no interest in Twilight at all -or-B) Think it's gak -or-C) have no idea what Twilight is.

Who's after women over 25? Just kidding.

Maybe it's a regional thing then. Practically every girl/woman I know is into it.

Otherwise well-balanced and intelligent women in their upper 20s left this very house to see the midnight showing of New Moon. *shudder*

Must be a regional thing. Because everybody I know (Other than my younger sister and *some* of her friends) just generally dislikes Twilight for various reasons. My family ignores it, my friends think it's an outrage to real vampires, and my English teacher and some of her students see that it's totally pointless and basically dull and plot-less. Apparently the best parts of the novel(s) are when it looks like Bella might die.

Meh. Harry Potter isn't really all that great either, IMHO. I liked it better when I read it 20 years ago when Roald Dahl did it first.

These popular book series tend to be garbage, and Twilight is no exception.

I think people on website dedicated to a franchise that is basically the juvenile male aesthetic turned to 11 should think long and hard before getting all elitist over a book series.

They like their crap and we like our crap.

"Think long and hard"? Lol, you like it "long and hard", that's pretty gay bro.

I hate Twilight for anumber of reasons, but most of all, I used to have fans come up to me, out of the blue, and start trying to discuss the plot with me. So now, I have to wear a bright colour somewhere on me, and I hate that so much.

DAMN YOU TWILIGHT *shakes fist*

The end of days has come. Prepare, ye faithful, for once the hated Twilight spews forth in its new form, the Unholy Meyer will bring the sparkles of Edward the Poorly Written to incinerate us. May the Emperor guide us through the endtime.

Now, hang on....... let us think carefully before succumbing to nerdrage.

(And, keep in mind, I'm a fully proud beer drinking, muscle car driving, meat eating guy's guy and I try to follow all the unwritten rules of being a man)

Before we all poo-poo Sephanie Meyer's "modern vampire" (read sparkly brooding vampire), consider reading the books and viewing movies first, and then call it crap, which it is.

But then again, is it? I mean, your average 40k player is not Meyers' target audience. Also consider that many of the themes present in Meyers' novels parallel themes and characters from Pride and Predjudice and Jane Eyre, revered English classics. (notably, the similarities between Edward, Mr. Darcy and Rochester)

But Frostreaver, you might say, these things do not a good book or movie make. And to that I would say yes, you are correct, except for the fact that many women of various ages love them. Understand that if you take the time and talk about, watch and read said Twilight Saga even though you dislike everything about it, you might find aforementioned women more understanding when you mention that you play with what are essentially grown-up toy soldiers. Because, keep in mind, many people, and not just women, find 40k just as ridiculous as we do sparkly vampires.

Also, learn to play Bella's Lullaby on the piano. Trust me boys, you won't regret it.

But yeah. Sparkly vampires and giant climactic battle where no one dies? Come on.

On Topic, this game will do OK, as long as the local authorities keep the tide of nerdrage away from it.

And now for my Twilight hate. Regional for sure. Every girl in Roleystone around the age of 12 is obsessed with it. I had to hide a friend from an angry mob of girls just because he called Taylor Lautner gay.
Despite this, we shouldn't be trying to kill the Twi-fans for the Earth's safety. I mean, maybe saving the Earth was what Hitler intended do during WWII (Ok, maybe not, but you get the point). Anyway, we should be thankful that the Vile Meyer has given men a new way of picking up ladies.

Man must now learn to accept the sparle vampire in society. STUPID LADIES MAN! *shakes fist*

Orkeosaurus wrote:"Think long and hard"? Lol, you like it "long and hard", that's pretty gay bro.

Better than short and floppy.

J.Black wrote:^^
Sounds more like World of Darkness to me. That would be an awesome mmo.

FYP.

Iron_Chaos_Brute wrote:

Golden Eyed Scout wrote:

isthatmycow wrote:^that. I am agreeing with GES.

DEATH TO TWILIGHT!

Sigged.

The ^ is also pointing to the greatest Rommel quote ever

I planned it like that btw.

Drk_Oblitr8r wrote:I hate Twilight for anumber of reasons, but most of all, I used to have fans come up to me, out of the blue, and start trying to discuss the plot with me. So now, I have to wear a bright colour somewhere on me, and I hate that so much.

DAMN YOU TWILIGHT *shakes fist*

This. People heard i liked fantasy and vampires (I told a friend I wanted to start a vampire counts army), and this is what happened. I awoke several hours later, covered in a red sticky substance.

sebster wrote:I think people on website dedicated to a franchise that is basically the juvenile male aesthetic turned to 11 should think long and hard before getting all elitist over a book series.

They like their crap and we like our crap.

40k isn't crap! It's a strategy game that requires dedication, artistic ability and the heart of a champion!

How dare you sir?

The culmination of all the nerd rage if a twilight game is released.

How much does everyone want to bet it will be on the DS and/or Wii with or by the next movie release?

Although I supose I could half-ass a book series too so you'd at least have something new to complain about, I wouldn't be able to hear them over all the money though.

Let's see where some random words picked out of the dictionary (couldn't find one going with Thesaurus, the lamest Dinosaur ever) lead me for the main plot idea.
Alright first two random pages were bad (Gas state and Liberation) third was an alright start, night. Then Proverb, then Revolution, Seasonal, Solitude and Misunderstand >_>

Also probably be best to throw magic/supernatural in there as well, will be pretty hard not to want to kill them all off in a fire.

It would be the only Video game liberals will condone the burning of.

I will pick up a few of them from the bargin bin for costers for my soda or paint pallets.

I'd like to see one come out and wave Half-Life in the Twilight video game makers' faces, telling them that despite Half-Life's bad graphics, recurring characters (due to not being able to make a different model for each person), and other ailments due to being a relatively old video game they're stupid ass video game will never be as good as THE video game.

This game has one potential that has been overlooked though.... A movie inspired game, that is actually as good as the movie.

^LOL. Yeah.

You all play with tiny plastic men and books with other dudes.

I'd like make the game. But instead of vampires amd sparkles have blood and metal. And like topless girls.

You go on a adventure to save one of said topless girls from a werewolf that has chainguns for hands.

And then just call it Twilight.

...and they ask early on if you're "Team Edward," "Team Jacob," or "Neither." Little do they know that Team Edward actually means their character gets split in half with a saw in gory detail immediately after opening the first door they encounter and Team Jacob means their character begins dying from a disease and only has 3 minutes to search for the non-existent cure.

But seriously I'm going to attempt to make a "reasonable discussion about twilight" thread in the near future and see if we can defuse some of the absolutely moronic nerdrage. It's fine to not like something, but it's annoying to complain about it constantly.

ShumaGorath wrote:You all play with tiny plastic men and books with other dudes.

And? Even we frown upon sparkly vampires.

Soladrin wrote:

ShumaGorath wrote:You all play with tiny plastic men and books with other dudes.

And? Even we frown upon sparkly vampires.

Yeah. It's kinda sad when we have something to look down on. I dunno. Maybe every group needs something to make themselves feel better.

TBH, I think most people's Twilight nerdrage is a little bit exaggerated. Well mine is anyway, I mean, I don't really care but its fun to joke about sometimes.

Snikkyd wrote:TBH, I think most people's Twilight nerdrage is a little bit exaggerated. Well mine is anyway, I mean, I don't really care but its fun to joke about sometimes.

Duh, though I refused to enter a friends room for 3 weeks after I found a poster in there...

Soladrin wrote:

Snikkyd wrote:TBH, I think most people's Twilight nerdrage is a little bit exaggerated. Well mine is anyway, I mean, I don't really care but its fun to joke about sometimes.

Duh, though I refused to enter a friends room for 3 weeks after I found a poster in there...

You're cool.







Eh, gotcha

Hey, it traumatized me... unsuspectingly walking into a room, to face.... that hideous face... I'm scarred for life >=(

Golden Eyed Scout wrote:

Soladrin wrote:

ShumaGorath wrote:You all play with tiny plastic men and books with other dudes.

And? Even we frown upon sparkly vampires.

Yeah. It's kinda sad when we have something to look down on. I dunno. Maybe every group needs something to make themselves feel better.

That reminds me of SLC Punk. The part where hes talking about how the different groups fit into everything. Dammit now I want to watch that movie

KingCracker wrote:


That reminds me of SLC Punk. The part where hes talking about how the different groups fit into everything. Dammit now I want to watch that movie

See,now SLC Punk was a good movie...and might make an interesting video game..bonus points if you can save Herion Bob

Golden Eyed Scout wrote:

Soladrin wrote:

ShumaGorath wrote:You all play with tiny plastic men and books with other dudes.

And? Even we frown upon sparkly vampires.

Yeah. It's kinda sad when we have something to look down on. I dunno. Maybe every group needs something to make themselves feel better.

True, but thats usually a downward hill. The person above looks down upon the people below. That is not happening here. The 40k community does not have the highground to nerdrage mock a group of people that likely have better social skills and more productive lives. It's like you're all trying to look back up the hill and thinking it's looking down. It's not even that this entire franchise is targeted to teen girls or that it's a movie and book series. It's that this website is dedicated to a group that is spending hundreds to perhaps thousands of dollars on tiny piles of plastic that you turn into little men to fight with your dude friends using dice in basements or the back of comic book stores and you can nerdrage for years about a harry potter proxy for teen girls with cute boys and mysterious and sparkly vampires. Who cares. It's not for you. Get over it.

Burn the heritic

ShumaGorath wrote:

Golden Eyed Scout wrote:

Soladrin wrote:

ShumaGorath wrote:You all play with tiny plastic men and books with other dudes.

And? Even we frown upon sparkly vampires.

Yeah. It's kinda sad when we have something to look down on. I dunno. Maybe every group needs something to make themselves feel better.

True, but thats usually a downward hill. The person above looks down upon the people below. That is not happening here. The 40k community does not have the highground to nerdrage mock a group of people that likely have better social skills and more productive lives. It's like you're all trying to look back up the hill and thinking it's looking down. It's not even that this entire franchise is targeted to teen girls or that it's a movie and book series. It's that this website is dedicated to a group that is spending hundreds to perhaps thousands of dollars on tiny piles of plastic that you turn into little men to fight with your dude friends using dice in basements or the back of comic book stores and you can nerdrage for years about a harry potter proxy for teen girls with cute boys and mysterious and sparkly vampires. Who cares. It's not for you. Get over it.

I have to agree with Shuma. I don't think Wargamers have any standing to look down on any group of females, regardless of age or fandom.

ShumaGorath wrote:

Golden Eyed Scout wrote:

Soladrin wrote:

ShumaGorath wrote:You all play with tiny plastic men and books with other dudes.

And? Even we frown upon sparkly vampires.

Yeah. It's kinda sad when we have something to look down on. I dunno. Maybe every group needs something to make themselves feel better.

True, but thats usually a downward hill. The person above looks down upon the people below. That is not happening here. The 40k community does not have the highground to nerdrage mock a group of people that likely have better social skills and more productive lives. It's like you're all trying to look back up the hill and thinking it's looking down. It's not even that this entire franchise is targeted to teen girls or that it's a movie and book series. It's that this website is dedicated to a group that is spending hundreds to perhaps thousands of dollars on tiny piles of plastic that you turn into little men to fight with your dude friends using dice in basements or the back of comic book stores and you can nerdrage for years about a harry potter proxy for teen girls with cute boys and mysterious and sparkly vampires. Who cares. It's not for you. Get over it.

It isn't a case of being higher or lower on the hill, both are pretty much exactly the same. Twilight's sexless but oh-so pretty mythical boys and 40K forever war ultraviolence are just the juvenile female aesthetic and juvenile male aesthetic respectively.

We mock the one for girls while embracing the one made for boys. Not that there's anything wrong with making fun of other people's interests, but it's a mistake to assume our thing is somehow superior to their thing.

But now you're implying that boys aren't better than girls; I sure won't be letting you in my couch fort any time soon!

Now I see this 40k/Twilight war as one of those one-sided circles. You know, those weird circles that the inside and otuside are the same. Anyway, I see it like them, because we are all doing the same thing, supporting what we like, and every so often one group holds the top part, the after time, the other group holds it. Each group can mock the other one equally. Or maybe this nerdrage has gotten into my head. Maybe I would actually like Twilight if I didn't hate sparkly things and cute vampires. Jakob is OK, as long as he stays a wolf, never human form.

I agree with Sebster. We're not looking down on Twilight fans as some kind of inferior being, we're simply poking fun at something we find ludicrous (Namely sparkly vampires).

Soladrin wrote:Hey, it traumatized me... unsuspectingly walking into a room, to face.... that hideous face... I'm scarred for life >=(

Hey at first everyone was simply alright with it.

It was later on when everyone would have realised how high they must have been when they wrote it. I just wonder though, you have those that comit suicide around their real life counter parts, but what would they do if someone tried it in their world? Open their mouth and enjoy the free meal?















I agree though Edward's face is creepy.

Perhaps Shuma and his ilk are going a bit too far in the opposite direction?

The caricature of the "live and let live" argument they are presenting is a little over the top.

Vampires have been somewhat nerdy for a long time now. They're something to be vanquished in D&D, something to pretend that you are in a park with a bunch of other nerds, or something to place a +1/+1 counter on when a creature dies on the same turn the vampire damages it. Then this paragon of nerdy ideals is taken and made cute and sparkly to be sold to a group of people that don't know the difference between a Brujah and a Malkavian.

I'm not saying that's what I think, but it seems to be the main issue and I can objectively understand their position.

From personal experience with the Twilight-ites (aka my wife, neighbor, and all female relatives, and co-workers) I will say that they know their material. I've never seen a group of people tear through a series of books (and retain the knowledge). I would like to think that I got my friends hooked on the Game of Thrones series, but it still took us months to get through them. The women made it through all 4 books in less than 1-2 months.

That being said I've been to the local premier of all three Star Wars prequels, LotR movies, Spiderman, and the Watchmen (among others). When I went to the Twilight and New Moon premier (the wife dragged me along) I've never heard such noises from women. I've also never been to a Chippendale's show so I don't know all the excitement that women are capable of, but I'm pretty sure they are near equivalent. I think a woman behind me literally had an orgasm when Jacob takes his shirt off for the first time.

My point is that for all the talk of who has rights to the higher ground I've never seen guys behave the way women have at these type of premiers.

Of course when the Ultramarines movie comes out who knows...

I plan to show up to the local premier of the Ultramarines movie dressed as Marneus Calgar and shouting anti-Xeno epithets at passersby.

Angrily.

You should do that at a Tea Party.

Obama can't be a High Lord, he was born on Ulthwe! Stop them from chaosisng our healthcare! How can Tyranids melt solid ceramite? Macragge was an inside job, wake up groxle!

Vampires have been somewhat nerdy for a long time now. They're something to be vanquished in D&D, something to pretend that you are in a park with a bunch of other nerds, or something to place a +1/+1 counter on when a creature dies on the same turn the vampire damages it. Then this paragon of nerdy ideals is taken and made cute and sparkly to be sold to a group of people that don't know the difference between a Brujah and a Malkavian.

I'm pretty sure you can't dibs a historical monster that even DND represents incredibly inaccurately when contrasted to actual myth. Vampires in all forms of fiction are a crappy monster. The kind that glitters is no worse than the kind that wears bondage and fights werewolves (hurr!).

Shuma: On the contrary, I find that if Edward dressed like a Cenobite and eviscerated a couple of werewolves with a silver halberd he would gain a lot more street cred.

And the funny thing about myth is that it can evolve. The wampyr from Eastern European myth has gone from a hideous bloodsucking beast to a urbane, sophisticated gentleman and is now a brooding teenager of ambiguous sexual preference. Who knows what it will be in another 400 years?

Shuma: On the contrary, I find that if Edward dressed like a Cenobite and eviscerated a couple of werewolves with a silver halberd he would gain a lot more street cred.

Well yeah. You're a dude. I would find that he would have a lot more street cred if the scripts he were in were better written and there was an actual level of relatable personal confliction and temptation in his character. Running around in leather and flinging swords at other vampires doesn't make something more credible, it's every bit as juvenile as the alternative. You're just not a girl, so you value the violence over the romance.

And the funny thing about myth is that it can evolve.

Certainly true.

The wampyr from Eastern European myth has gone from a hideous bloodsucking beast to a urbane, sophisticated gentleman and is now a brooding teenager of ambiguous sexual preference.

Yeah. It was a real gentlemans club before.

Who knows what it will be in another 400 years?

Hopefully gone.

Oh I see. You're just being unpleasant then. I apologize for attempting to enter a civil exchange with you.

I could go back over the context in which I was referring to Twilight's "street cred" but something tells me it would be a tremendous waste of time.

Monster Rain wrote:Oh I see. You're just being unpleasant then. I apologize for attempting to enter a civil exchange with you.

I could go back over the context in which I was referring to Twilight's "street cred" but something tells me it would be a tremendous waste of time.

Feel free. I found it strange that hollywood movie monsters would even be able to have street cred, especially incarnations of such monsters that almost by definition (magic, videogames, dnd) involve being in a house and not on a street.

Actually, I don't believe most vampires are allowed into one's house unless invited.

I would imagine that most of their interactions would take place outdoors.

My story: I read all 4 books in a month or so for my girlfriend's birthday so she'd have someone to talk to. I've since had many conversations with girls about Twilight and if I'm available again will certainly use this as a tactic to get women interested in me. I go to the movie premieres with her because she's really into it. I honestly don't mind it, though I'm not going to scream whenever I see Robert Pattinson or look up crap about it online. As far as what she could be in to girly-wise, Twilight tops my list.

Shuma, looks like we're on the same team on this one Does anybody else think it's odd that if a chick plays a wargame everyone thinks it's awesome and many would likely hover over her or treat her like a goddess but if a guy liked Twilight he'd have lots of weird pressure and awkward looks to deal with? People should be free to like what they like without having disproportionate reactions cast at them. I feel like people go out of their way to hate Twilight without good justification. Stephenie Meyer doesn't watch vampire movies or read vampire books; she simply used a name of a type of myth and made it her way, the same way that underworld vampires are different from WoD vamps to DnD vamps. I think the idea of a soulless, loveless being is more slowed than one who retains human qualities personally.

In response to specific accusations:

They aren't sexless. In the 4th book Bella is left extremely bruised after her and Edward have sex (and her half-vampire child begins eating her from the inside, forcing her to drink blood while still human). Alice and Jasper talk about hooking up for months on end after getting together. Rosalie only got turned because she was dying after being sexually assaulted and it was the only way to keep her "alive." Twilight has more sex than 40k.

People die. More people die than in Dragonball Z or Bleach. In particular the 3rd movie features an army of otherwise innocent newbie vamps getting slaughtered.

The characters can be bad-ass too. Jasper got "turned" in the civil war and is supposed to be covered in scars (hope they get this right in the movie). Edward hunts mountain lions and Emmett hunts bears for fun (again, missing from the movie). The Volturi consume a room of tourists and have agents that can cause people immense pain and make them convulse until they die just by looking at them.

Not saying anyone has to like it, just trying to quell at least some of the bashing.

Cannerus_The_Unbearable wrote:Not saying anyone has to like it, just trying to quell at least some of the bashing.

I'd be really shocked if those bashing it have even cracked one of the books. I think it's all done mainly out of having a bit of fun, and not nearly as malicious as some would make it out to be.

Monster Rain wrote:

Cannerus_The_Unbearable wrote:Not saying anyone has to like it, just trying to quell at least some of the bashing.

I'd be really shocked if those bashing it have even cracked one of the books. I think it's all done mainly out of having a bit of fun, and not nearly as malicious as some would make it out to be.

Is it better to mock something you know nothing about obsessively than to mock something you actually have some level of experience with? This is all less an issue of the mocking being malicious as it is the mocking being tiresome and annoying several years on.

ShumaGorath wrote:

Monster Rain wrote:

Cannerus_The_Unbearable wrote:Not saying anyone has to like it, just trying to quell at least some of the bashing.

I'd be really shocked if those bashing it have even cracked one of the books. I think it's all done mainly out of having a bit of fun, and not nearly as malicious as some would make it out to be.

Is it better to mock something you know nothing about obsessively than to mock something you actually have some level of experience with? This is all less an issue of the mocking being malicious as it is the mocking being tiresome and annoying several years on.

Dude, then call the cops and have them take away the man holding a gun to your head and forcing you to read the threads!

Monster Rain wrote:Dude, then call the cops and have them take away the man holding a gun to your head and forcing you to read the threads!

I can't. He said he'll shoot me if I call the cops.

ShumaGorath wrote:

Monster Rain wrote:Dude, then call the cops and have them take away the man holding a gun to your head and forcing you to read the threads!

I can't. He said he'll shoot me if I call the cops.

That'll teach you not to have a panic room!

Monster Rain wrote:

ShumaGorath wrote:

Monster Rain wrote:Dude, then call the cops and have them take away the man holding a gun to your head and forcing you to read the threads!

I can't. He said he'll shoot me if I call the cops.

That'll teach you not to have a panic room!

I do, but it's full of vampires so I can't really use it.

*sigh*...it seems that the Ordo must once again go into action.

Also, the only reason I would even consider owning this game is if it was Twilight vs Blade. And I get to be Blade.

ShumaGorath wrote:

Monster Rain wrote:

ShumaGorath wrote:

Monster Rain wrote:Dude, then call the cops and have them take away the man holding a gun to your head and forcing you to read the threads!

I can't. He said he'll shoot me if I call the cops.

That'll teach you not to have a panic room!

I do, but it's full of vampires so I can't really use it.

Just tell them what terrible monsters they are and shame them into leaving.

I guess my main stake in this, or the only reason I care, is that I hate repression on the basis of "gender identity." I'm attracted to men and women. I haven't had "the talk" with my family, but I know it won't go well. I won't say a word to them about it until it becomes relevant (i.e. I get serious with a guy, if that happens) and if anyone in my family takes enough interest in me to follow my tracks on the internet and it spoils it, kudos to them for caring more than I thought they did :p I believe that regardless, I can be a very masculine figure. I don't think someone should have to fit a certain mold to like something or that because they like something it automatically makes them a certain way. Being perfectly honest, how many of you would assume a guy was gay for wearing a slim-cut Twilight shirt? He might like his tits as much as the next guy, and you wouldn't know it.

Edit: Accusing nobody hear of "hating" or discriminating, just trying to draw a bit of a parallel.

Cannerus_The_Unbearable wrote:I guess my main stake in this, or the only reason I care, is that I hate repression on the basis of "gender identity." I'm attracted to men and women. I haven't had "the talk" with my family, but I know it won't go well. I won't say a word to them about it until it becomes relevant (i.e. I get serious with a guy, if that happens) and if anyone in my family takes enough interest in me to follow my tracks on the internet and it spoils it, kudos to them for caring more than I thought they did :p I believe that regardless, I can be a very masculine figure. I don't think someone should have to fit a certain mold to like something or that because they like something it automatically makes them a certain way. Being perfectly honest, how many of you would assume a guy was gay for wearing a slim-cut Twilight shirt? He might like his tits as much as the next guy, and you wouldn't know it.

Edit: Accusing nobody hear of "hating" or discriminating, just trying to draw a bit of a parallel.

Whoa. Ahem. After declaring that in a forum such as this I'd figure telling your family would be a snap! At least they love you. I assume.

I think it's just indicative that men and women like different things. Just look at the advertisements that run on Spike TV as compared to Oxygen Network. I don't think I'm saying anything particularly profound here.

And to be honest, the idea of romantic vampires isn't new. Bela Lugosi played a pretty charming vampire, and Ann Rice's novels were extremely sexual.

I've mentioned it before. I was just clarifying the situation so it didn't look like I was pouring myself into defending what is, at it's heart, a rather insignificant love story in the grand scheme of things. The advertisements I don't believe mean that men and women are so terribly different as much as the advertisers would love for everyone to fit inside a box and tend to reinforce the images people have about themselves. I just want people to be happy and free, cheesy as it sounds, even if they disagree But making people feel like they can't make their own choices because the "cool club" says otherwise or dismissing things as stupid (and therefore insulting the people that like it) will never sit well with me.

For your reading pleasure, http://www.somethingawful.com/d/news/stephanie-meyer-letter.php.

Personally, I recognize it as a weak story and one that is poorly written. Its transparent attempts to compare itself to Shakespeare, Wuthering Heights, and basically any high school love story does not make it great literature. That's ok! It is a teen phenomenon that happens to attract a smattering of older women. I very much enjoy the equally pretentious 'Pride and Prejudice and Zombies', but I am not going to tell you that it is remotely comparable to any sort of classic.

To see good writing, pick up one of the later Harry Potter novels. JK Rowling knows how to sling words, net together subplots, and maintain character integrity. Stephenie Meyer has her arch-rivals go from murderous rage to best-buds as soon as their goals match up. As a high school teacher, I keep myself abreast of writing for this age group.

You can see more internal consistency in Rick Riordan's Percy Jackson novels- but you don't find the fantastical romance, or the idea of love without sex in anything that's popular with the kids these days.

Mrs. Meyers is peddling the same thing that made us all love the Princess Bride- true love. With better casting, these movies would also have defined a generation. Instead, I predict they will enjoy the same popularity that the Matrix had in the 90s and the same fall.

I find it interesting that people feel the need to clarify that Stephenie Meyer isn't a legendary author. She never claims to be one I seem to remember her saying something to the effect of "I'm just a housewife who writes books." The only reason I remember that is because my girl went on and on about how it pissed off some of the fans.

Monster Rain wrote:I plan to show up to the local premier of the Ultramarines movie dressed as Marneus Calgar and shouting anti-Xeno epithets at passersby.

Angrily.

You mean at the Walmart? Seriously, if you show up to the premiere of a direct to DVD movie dressed up...

Platuan4th wrote:

Monster Rain wrote:I plan to show up to the local premier of the Ultramarines movie dressed as Marneus Calgar and shouting anti-Xeno epithets at passersby.

Angrily.

You mean at the Walmart? Seriously, if you show up to the premiere of a direct to DVD movie dressed up...

Hell no, not Walmart.

Target.

Monster Rain wrote:

Platuan4th wrote:

Monster Rain wrote:I plan to show up to the local premier of the Ultramarines movie dressed as Marneus Calgar and shouting anti-Xeno epithets at passersby.

Angrily.

You mean at the Walmart? Seriously, if you show up to the premiere of a direct to DVD movie dressed up...

Hell no, not Walmart.

Target.

But Target doesn't do Midnight releases! How am i going to get it at 12:01 AM from Target?!

Marneus Calgar cares not for your feeble hours of operation or the paltry pane of glass in your pathetic front door, Target.

I will claim the first copy in the Emperor's name!

I only came into this thread hoping to see some ruffled panties. I am wayyyyyyyy disappointed.

Twilight's target audience are tween girls. I mean, that's like saying your target demographic are people with multiple personalities. I figure if something is aimed at tween girls, I won't understand it, have no interest in it, and am best served by staying away.

Interestingly, my 47 year old sister-in-law is a huge fan of the series and has read all the book(s). I make fun of her for it. She makes fun of me for playing with toy soldiers. It's pretty bad when you can respond to something with, "Hey, I only play with toy soldiers, you _______."

dietrich wrote:I only came into this thread hoping to see some ruffled panties. I am wayyyyyyyy disappointed.

"Ruffled panties" and Kristen Stewart need to stay far, far away from each other. Ashley Greene on the other hand...

dietrich wrote: Interestingly, my 47 year old sister-in-law is a huge fan of the series and has read all the book(s). I make fun of her for it. She makes fun of me for playing with toy soldiers. It's pretty bad when you can respond to something with, "Hey, I only play with toy soldiers, you _______."

That's why I don't give the wife too much crap. I know she'll turn it back on me and tell me to go paint some silver pants blue.

Now that I think about it I will most likely squeel like a little girl (at some point) during the Ultramarine movie. That or we'll have a game of 40k in the theatre lobby.

Cannerus_The_Unbearable wrote:"Ruffled panties" and Kristen Stewart need to stay far, far away from each other. Ashley Greene on the other hand...

I think that Ms. Stewart is a lesbian. Ms. Greene is okay, but she's no Gwen Stefani or Jennifer Love Hewitt.

Gitzbitah wrote:Mrs. Meyers is not peddling the same thing that made us all love the Princess Bride- Andre the Giant.

Fix'd

I think that listing all the reasons "Why you love Andre The Giant" would require it's own thread. I can think of 6 or 7 off the top of my head.

Sorry, I had to...

In all honesty, putting my bad joke aside I do really agree with Shuma. Its pointless to make fun of other nerds while being nerds. Although to be fair I think I live under a rock I didn't know what the hell Twilight was until I started seeing all the mockery about it on the net. And I have yet to see any rabid fangirls yet.


If only I could say the same about Final Fantasy...

Monster Rain wrote:And the funny thing about myth is that it can evolve. The wampyr from Eastern European myth has gone from a hideous bloodsucking beast to a urbane, sophisticated gentleman and is now a brooding teenager of ambiguous sexual preference. Who knows what it will be in another 400 years?

There was a strong sexual element to the original vampire stories. The fear of eastern europeans coming and taking our women was transformed into fear of an eastern european vampire coming and taking our women, and contrasting that with proper Victorian attitudes to sex was basically the core of the story. Vampires as a way to look at sexuality is actually very true to the source material, a lot more true than vampires fighting werewolves.


Automatically Appended Next Post:

Gitzbitah wrote:Personally, I recognize it as a weak story and one that is poorly written. Its transparent attempts to compare itself to Shakespeare, Wuthering Heights, and basically any high school love story does not make it great literature. That's ok!

Funnily enough Wuthering Heights is also schlock that's managed to end up being hailed as a classic for reasons I've never understood.

But then, literature is full of classics that really aren't all that good. Does anyone think Dickens is really all that? Last of the Mohicans is hailed as a classic, but if it was written today it'd be seen as the teleplay of a b-movie (the film cut the goofiest parts and the overt classism, and still ended up as a beautifully shot Mills & Boon story).

sebster wrote:Vampires as a way to look at sexuality is actually very true to the source material, a lot more true than vampires fighting werewolves.

Once you read some of the vampire fiction that came out of the Romantic period (Polidori's The Vampyre immediately comes to mind) the thematic balance of Twilight makes a lot more sense. Take the mystique of Byronic fiction, and then remove the vice which makes it believable; thereby enhancing the fantasy.

sebster wrote:

Monster Rain wrote:And the funny thing about myth is that it can evolve. The wampyr from Eastern European myth has gone from a hideous bloodsucking beast to a urbane, sophisticated gentleman and is now a brooding teenager of ambiguous sexual preference. Who knows what it will be in another 400 years?

There was a strong sexual element to the original vampire stories. The fear of eastern europeans coming and taking our women was transformed into fear of an eastern european vampire coming and taking our women, and contrasting that with proper Victorian attitudes to sex was basically the core of the story. Vampires as a way to look at sexuality is actually very true to the source material, a lot more true than vampires fighting werewolves.

Actually the original European Vampire stories had Vampires as bloated, stinking corpses, not as sexual figures at all.

Platuan4th wrote:Actually the original European Vampire stories had Vampires as bloated, stinking corpses, not as sexual figures at all.

Fair point, I should have said the original Victorian vampire stories. The East European folklore they draw from is a whole other thing.


Automatically Appended Next Post:

dogma wrote:Once you read some of the vampire fiction that came out of the Romantic period (Polidori's The Vampyre immediately comes to mind) the thematic balance of Twilight makes a lot more sense. Take the mystique of Byronic fiction, and then remove the vice which makes it believable; thereby enhancing the fantasy.

True. There's probably at least a thousand english lit essays out there comparing Twilight and the original vampire stories.

sebster wrote:

Monster Rain wrote:And the funny thing about myth is that it can evolve. The wampyr from Eastern European myth has gone from a hideous bloodsucking beast to a urbane, sophisticated gentleman and is now a brooding teenager of ambiguous sexual preference. Who knows what it will be in another 400 years?

There was a strong sexual element to the original vampire stories. The fear of eastern europeans coming and taking our women was transformed into fear of an eastern european vampire coming and taking our women, and contrasting that with proper Victorian attitudes to sex was basically the core of the story. Vampires as a way to look at sexuality is actually very true to the source material, a lot more true than vampires fighting werewolves.


Automatically Appended Next Post:

Gitzbitah wrote:Personally, I recognize it as a weak story and one that is poorly written. Its transparent attempts to compare itself to Shakespeare, Wuthering Heights, and basically any high school love story does not make it great literature. That's ok!

Funnily enough Wuthering Heights is also schlock that's managed to end up being hailed as a classic for reasons I've never understood.

But then, literature is full of classics that really aren't all that good. Does anyone think Dickens is really all that? Last of the Mohicans is hailed as a classic, but if it was written today it'd be seen as the teleplay of a b-movie (the film cut the goofiest parts and the overt classism, and still ended up as a beautifully shot Mills & Boon story).

Loads of people thing Dickens is great, including many professors of English literature.

welcome to twilight war one nerds and reall vampire/ warewolf fans vs. 10 year old to 22 year old girl and pansys go. lol