So, spinning off from the thread about a Father doing his Fatherly duty (what, I'm not *that* lefty liberal!) I felt it was time to discuss how best to deal with Bullies, either as a parent of friend of someone being bullied, or as a victim.
First up, please post in the poll so we can see how many were actually bullied, and how many might have actually been the bully etc. I would ask that people not have a go at former Bullies, as from personal experience they aren't always aware of the consequences of their actions. I have also allowed multiple choice answers, as personally, I been on both ends of the stick, and I don't think I'd be the only one!
So, how to deal with them? Does it depend on the nature of the bullying, from allegedly light hearted jappery getting a bit out of hand and personal, to concerted and very deliberate campaigns to make someones life hell for their folly of not quite being what the bully sees as 'normal'.
My story goes as follows. In Primary School (age 5-11) I was something of a bully. My friends and I were the in-crowd, and though things rarely got physical, we did more than our fair share of name calling, chair pulling, book hiding behaviour. Occasionally we would go too far, and wind up in trouble, in fisticuffs, or both. I won't claim this was 'negligible' as to my mind, bullying is bullying. We may not have really understood the consequences, but we knew some kids got really upset, so we just went after them all the more. Then came the move to England, where to my dismay, the boot was truly on the other foot, and from the ages of 11-16, I was the one being bullied regularly, by dint of being quite small and weak at the time (more on this later). Perhaps it's a little self defending, but I considered the Secondary School bullying a lot worse than primary school. From constant verbal taunting, to being beaten up or having ciggies put out on my uniform, I was pretty fething miserable. Sadly, this also continued at home, as my brother received much the same treatment, and decided to take his frustrations out on me.
So eventually the arseholes that made my life difficult left school, and I continued on to 6th Form and College, where my confidence grew and the bullying ceased. Never did anything in retaliation, barring the odd pasting of a crap bully who found out I could fight dirty (testicles gentlemen...testicles) whilst at school, but after education, things started to change. For a start, around the age of 16 what happens happened, and I shot up from a little over 5'4" to 6'3" in what seemed like a few weeks (ouch..seriously ouch) and inexplicably put on a fair bit of muscle. So about a year out of school, I'm enjoying a pint with new friends in the pub, minding my own business. And what do I hear from behind me? Why, one of my former Bullies declaring he knew I was in 'his' Pub, and he was going to 'feth me up' for daring to drink in 'his' pub. Now I'd not seen this particular little cock-knocker for about 2ish years. So when I literarly stood up to him, he looked a little shocked, before the back pedaling kicked in. Quite a few years of anger and frustration almost came out, but in the end, I went with the humiliation route, pointing out his sudden reluctance to 'feth me up' now I wasn't notably smaller and weaker than him, and also had some friends to back me up. This was done quite loudly and publicly, so all would know that he was a pathetic little urchin whose reputation for being 'well hard' stemmed from his previously unfailing ability to seek out targets that were very much less than challenging.
Now, if only I had done that a few years ago in class, whilst I was still smaller and weaker than him. Pointed out it was he who was the pussy, and not me. Would I still have got me head kicked in? Possibly, I dunno. But passive resistance has always been my thing, and this is something I preach to the younger kids I know. Hell, even confronted one of their bullies when he came into the GW I was playing in to try and pick on the kid there. He left with his tail between his legs, and as far as I know, hasn't hassled the kid in question since.
I caught a lot of gak as a younger kid, but I don't think it was more than average.
Just your run of the mill "big kids hassling the young kids" sort of deal. I lived in a rather backward and ignorant part of the country as well, I don't know if that made it better or worse. I only can recall 1 or 2 times that I actually had someone put their hands on me, and it wasn't that big of a deal. Even when I was getting "bullied" I always sort of felt superior to the big idiots that were getting enjoyment out of messing with kids that couldn't really fight back.
I tell me daughters not to give a feth what people think or say about them, and to just be themselves. Ignore the idiots, because your life is going to be full of them. That said, they have my full permission to hit, bite, kick and eye-gouge to defend themselves if need be.
Luckily they haven't really been physically harmed as far as I know, but I guarantee I'll probably be on the news myself if they're getting hurt by other kids and the school isn't doing anything about it.
I went to public and private schools, and have been out in society - hence I have been bullied. It is unavoidable. Some people are just miserable. Some are looking to entertain themselves. I don't blame them but I would have a personal problem if I didn't think I could cope with the fact that there are arseholes pretty much everywhere.
Identifying and dealing with the offenders is something that can be done from a position of authority, but simple personal confidence and a practiced right-hook for emergency situations will get you a long way.
Be thankful that you only have to deal with bullies, and that you don't live in Columbia or Congo having to deal with armed militia and paramilitary types. On the other hand, if where you live is simply a miserable shithole then you have three choices:
1) Be a victim
2) Become Batman
3) Get the hell out of there!
My Mom and Dad eventually said if they do it again just beat the gak out of them.
Sure enough the bully walked up and started making fun of me, He took a right hook to the jaw and went down crying his eyes out. I got suspended for a day, played video games all day, and was never given gak again.
ShivanAngel wrote:
My Mom and Dad eventually said if they do it again just beat the gak out of them.
Sure enough the bully walked up and started making fun of me, He took a right hook to the jaw and went down crying his eyes out. I got suspended for a day, played video games all day, and was never given gak again.
Sometimes it works out like that.
Sometimes you hit the bully and knock him down, he gets back up and whips your ass for you. Yeah, that happened. Even then, IIRC, things got better. If someone knows that they're going to get punched in the face it will give them pause, even if they could probably wipe the floor with you afterward.
That's exactly it. If they know you're not an easy mark, then you're not worth the trouble.
I didn't get bullied a lot because I had a smart mouth and my dad taught me the correct method of schoolyard problem resolution - apply fist liberally.
In... seventh grade I believe... me and my mates had our usual 'hangout' at lunchtime. It was where we sat. If other kids were there we'd tell them to clear off. If they were bigger and meaner than us we'd only try once, and we'd have to go somewhere else.
We had this great hangout along the rear of one of the main building blocks and a long concrete footpath. The next 'hangout' was about 25-30 metres down the path, and one day they threw an apple at us.
It hit the ground an exploded, covering our bags and gear with... well, apple. So we threw an apple or orange or something back. That's where it began to escalate.
Over the following weeks we would actually bring ammunition to school. We asked our parents for extra fruit for lunch - they were surely delighted. Soon we were stealing potatoes, tomatoes, cobs of corn when they came into season and I could steal them right out of the field down the road (rural town). Stale bread. Waterbombs and clods of dirt alike. We'd approach from different angles and aim something ridiculous like a cabbage at the building wall above their heads. It became absolutely insane.
There was so much food debris between our two hangouts you could have prepared a small community dinner instead - but this was so much more fun.
There were no tears, little anger, and fun was had all around. That's what bullying should be like.
I got into alot of fights as a kid with bullies. I would stand up for myself and fight the bullies. Most of my fights I won some I lost regrettably because of gang ups.
I don't respect bullies but I don't respect people who don't stand up to bullies.
You can't expect it to go away unless you do something about it.
In my military training they taught us to present ourselves as "hard targets" when/if we were to go in the cities/towns on patrols. Being a hard target meant always being aware of your surroundings, weapon at the ready, not just slouching around with your hands in your pocket, etc. Basically ready to react and fire back at the enemy in a moments notice. I've never actually had to go on patrols due to the nature of my career field, however, the principle still applies outside of the military. If you are a "hard target" you are less likely to be picked on/targeted.
Up until about 7th grade, I was the victim. I lost my baby fat very late, and was teased and bullied relentlessly for it for most of my young life. This is despite going to the level of parental interventions and whatnot. Hit my growth spurt summer between 6th and 7th, and spent most of 7th and 8th grades largely in the principals office for violently enacting vengeance, and generally explosive reactions to any slight.
By high school, I was on the other side. I was completely the aggressor. I was a very angry kid at the time. Parents were going through a rough divorce, financial stability was up in the air, and despite how gakky things were, I was still expected to be some kind of child prodigy in school. Add to that the Alpha-Male reputation I earned from both my male peers and females (wink wink, nudge nudge), it's not hard to see, I think, how easy it was for me to slip into a pattern of violence.
I graduated high school, and by tat time things were a bit better at home. Joining the military, though not a great experience for me, did, at the very least teach me some self discipline. Add to that the fact that I'm no longer a minor, and can be charged for assault as an adult, I've calmed down quite a bit.
Probably not helpful to the OP's question, but damn if that wasn't therapeutic.
Bullying, yep, I was bully'd pretty badly when I was younger, first day of grade seven, had the crap kicked out of me by a grade 9 student, then spent the next two years hiding in the library each break so he wouldn't get me, although he delighted in throwing his elbow in my face as we passed in the corridoor, when he left year 10 I though I was free, so i ventured into the yard again only to become the victim of more bully's constant name calling and shoving but not too bad like the last guy, until i snapped and lashed out to make them stop....bad idea, now i was the skinny crying kid that they got a reaction from! so it just went on and on until i left grade ten, although in my break between schools i was attacked by a gang of youths in a local store and damaged some bones in my face and jaw and eye sockets, not much luck hey? al because I was skinny and quiet and kept to myself, now i've learnt the secret is self confidence! yes that's right! get some now! I looked at the people doing this and the people they didn't mess with so I took it apon myself to re create my life, I shaved my head (tough guys have shaved heads) I grew a beard (tough guys have beards) I worked out and drank protein shakes every day (tough guys are buff) and then i started doing martial arts (tough guys...anyway) so in the end I went from a skinny quiet kid with a boy band haircut, to someone who had confidence and looked like they knew how to handle themselves and in reality I probably did, but deep down i was still the kid who doesn't like confrontation and was sick of being picked on, some people just need to bully someone to feel whole, they need the rush of being 'better' than someone, I saw one of my tormentors years after, and when he saw me all i said to him was "I do believe I owe you a beating from when we went to school?" and smiled, the look on his face was priceless! he ended up working at my work for a few years but was always super friendly towards me, so is bullying a kids thing? or do we each have our own methods for getting to the light at the end of the bullying tunnel? and how do we stop it? is it getting worse for the youth of today? I( was lucky but i keep hearing about the poor kids/adults who take their own life because of someone else and no one should feel that helpless, if I had children who were being bullied I wouldn't hesitate to push the envelope and confront the bully's and the parents until it was resolved. if I could i'd become an advocate for anti bullying behavior I don't think it has a place in todays society, it was a hell of a decade for me and I wouldn't wish it apon anyone, I do have to say though that I wouldn't be who I was and as strong if I didn't have to fight my way through the pain it caused, but it still isn't good, fun or right.
Automatically Appended Next Post: Wow, sorry for ranting on there guys, it didn't seem so long before!
I was a violent kid. VERY violent. I was a seething mass of hatred, and sent a kid to hospital with a broken collar-bone when I was in primary school. I used to fight all the time, to such a degree that I was sent to a child psychologist for a fairly protracted period. These weren't like normal kiddy fights - people (including myself) got injured.
It's important to note that I wasn't a bully at all. I didn't pick on anyone, and I wasn't particularly big and strong then, just a lunatic. If someone wanted it, I would give it to them. Also, I lived in a pretty crappy area.
After a while, I learnt to control myself much better, and hardly had a fight with anyone at school during my entire time at secondary. I guess I just didn't give off 'victim' vibes - I was still pretty hostile.
I still don't really fight. I never need to. No-one gives me any gak, and I don't go looking for it.
So yeah, I answered 'never been a bully or been bullied'.
I was bullied quite extensively in all three schools I went to.
Elementary school: My mom was the secretary, which meant I was the best target for the kids. It didn't help that at the time I was too stupid to realize much of what was going on.
6th grade: The kids who had been bullying me's parents were the teachers/staff, and since their parents weren't like mine, they got away with bloody murder. I once got grabbed and dragged down the hall while these bastards were choking me, did the one thing I could do at the time -bite the hand of the guy who was choking me (drew blood, too) - and yet I got in trouble for it, and got made fun of even more because "only babies bite".
Then on I went to a new school, and people left me alone for the most part because I just didn't put myself out there, and the few people who did try to do anything quickly landed with their face on the ground. I found it rather nice that my dad started teaching me a few cop tricks and my brothers were both in wrestling, one was even in Judo. Bullying got really bad right before I graduated, almost to the point where I lost control and would have gone on figurative killing spree, I would start walking towards people before I realized what I was about to do. The good news was that I actually had some stable friends at the time, so I was actually able to keep myself in check, since most of them where girls and didn't really beleive in fighting.
Never have gotten buillied or buillied. Only got lil teased for being shorter than everybody throughout elementary and high school. Even though I was always shorter, never really got buillied on because I was always naturally stronger than my classmates. When high school came around I was always at the gym, did wrestling, karate and was friends with the biggest football player .
@ Slarg232: Wow man, your Mom worked at the school AND your Dad was a cop. I can't even imagine the crap you were put through at school. In mine the Principals only son was expelled for his own safety because of the crap he took.
As for me I was a bully. I was brought up knowing what fighting was supposed to be, two people settling a dispute by causing physical harm to eachother. But at the same time my older brother and I thought of fighting as something you do with friends as a sport, "Pain is how you know that you're alive" and such. At first the thought of fighting someone you don't like just didn't make sense to me, after all how did you know they wouldn't go overboard and kick you in the groin or gouge your eyes etc. it was better to avoid conflict.
That lasted until about the 6th grade when I had seen enough to put it together. I started picking on certain groups of people italians mostly because they were a majority and an elitest group in my mind, but football players too since the two groups acted the same weither they were on the team or not Italian or not etc. Our team wasn't good at all, they weren't the jocks you see on TV so it wasn't exactley an underdog story here. I remember I would get so angry when someone wouldn't fight me past the 30 second rule (In our highschool when a fight broke out it was broken up in about 30 seconds, if you were still standing in that time people treated you better), this made them weak and less then human in my mind. So I guess in that way standing up for your self earned you some respect from me but you had to stick with it because even if I respected you I have always enjoyed fighting.
Well I got lucky, I was quite popular with the girls, played alot of instruments and were quite strapping if I dare say so myself.
Perhaps that was the problem with them kids.
Now that I have read through the other posts a bit more I just realized that in high school I was perhaps the worst kind. I was the "backup", so to speak. I saw alot, ALOT, of bullying going on, but I just ignored it, having previously gotten alot of crap for being "gay". It got really fething bloody too, a kid lost two teeth infront of me and I just kept smoking that cigarette, thinking to myself what a pathetic guy he was, why wasn't he standing up to himself, get buffed, fight back, all that.
It all stopped for me that day when the girl-clic went to far with one of the less popular girls. She was actually cute and having worked with her earlier that year I always had a harder time ignoring what they did to her. I had even taken some coffee with her in the mess hall. Anyway, one of the clics suddenly maced her. Just picked up a can of that gak and maced her. People were just looking, even the teachers ignored it. I just felt the red falling before my eyes, so I punched the . Hard. Her nose broke pretty fairly. Suddenly the teachers cared and I was picked up by the cops and was expelled. Joined the army, served, went back to another school and finished. Never heard from that poor girl again, but the one I punched is a fashion blogger now and makes the big bucks. Life sucks, but I guess I wouldn't have been able to live with myself if I hadn't done anything.
Still, punching a girl... I still wake up screaming in the night. The horror... the horror...
I'm an unsporty guy in a sport-mad nation, so I got shoved around a bit. It only started escalating into two-way physical violence when I started realising the school's system of 'ignore them' or 'ask them to stop' was bs.
I get stares from nearly everyone I walk by, but most of them are too afraid to talk to me. I tend to be the quiet one, that doesn't really talk to people. I just am used to people being stupid, and the looks I get from them.
6 inch liberty spikes,a modded leather jacket,and the stompiest boots in school scares people I guess.
A Black Ram wrote:I get stares from nearly everyone I walk by, but most of them are too afraid to talk to me. I tend to be the quiet one, that doesn't really talk to people. I just am used to people being stupid, and the looks I get from them.
6 inch liberty spikes,a modded leather jacket,and the stompiest boots in school scares people I guess.
A Black Ram wrote:I get stares from nearly everyone I walk by, but most of them are too afraid to talk to me. I tend to be the quiet one, that doesn't really talk to people. I just am used to people being stupid, and the looks I get from them.
6 inch liberty spikes,a modded leather jacket,and the stompiest boots in school scares people I guess.
Basicly this in high school and up.
I was the towering guy in the spikey leather jacket with a Misfits skull emblazoned across the back,the Doc Martens and foot high Mohawk,I didn't get hassled much.
I did get some flak in grade school,but no more than any other kid...mostly getting messed with by older kids and such.
I guess I've given some people crap before, but I try not to now. I picked a fight with a kid twice my size once and he quite literally wiped the floor with me. Picked me up over his head and threw me down on mine.
I broke his nose though
Also gotten into a few tussles on the rugby field. I can't say that I don't enjoy it Unfortunately this doesn't always work out so well as I'm backline and I seem to always pick fights with big stupid forwards. But who says a 140 lb wing can't take on a 250+ lb prop?
rubiksnoob wrote:
Also gotten into a few tussles on the rugby field. I can't say that I don't enjoy it
I wish my school had rugby
Start a team! Get a bunch of guys that want to play and go to your principal or whatever and say "Hey, we have a lot of people that want to play rugby, why isn't there a team?"
Start a team! Get a bunch of guys that want to play and go to your principal or whatever and say "Hey, we have a lot of people that want to play rugby, why isn't there a team?"
if ONLY it was that easy! we've only had a Wrestling team for about 2 years now. Plus, we couldn't support it. Our school system sucks major Ork Hide and(If I'm correct on this) <- Our Govonor and his little goons, cut the funding for most of the school programs. Band, Art clubs, Cheerleaders, etc. have almost no money now. Our Art club has to raise every penny for anything we want. Our band spent its money almost before the school even started, we aren't even going anywhere this year. SO.....if ONLY it was that easy
All of that was probably too much information but it felt necessary to me
Start a team! Get a bunch of guys that want to play and go to your principal or whatever and say "Hey, we have a lot of people that want to play rugby, why isn't there a team?"
if ONLY it was that easy! we've only had a Wrestling team for about 2 years now. Plus, we couldn't support it.
Our school system sucks major Ork Hide and(If I'm correct on this) <- Our Govonor and his little goons, cut the funding for most of the school programs. Band, Art clubs, Cheerleaders, etc. have almost no money now. Our Art club has to raise every penny for anything we want. Our band spent its money almost before the school even started, we aren't even going anywhere this year.
SO.....if ONLY it was that easy ^
^
^
All of that was probably too much information but it felt necessary to me
ahh, well that's a bummer. Best sport ever. You could try and find a club, but they are usually pretty expensive.
rubiksnoob wrote:
ahh, well that's a bummer. Best sport ever. You could try and find a club, but they are usually pretty expensive.
well I could probably find enough people to start a team....but so far as I know, the game is nowhere near as popular in AMerica than it is over there......plus......In band, Time is a thing we don't have extra.
rubiksnoob wrote:
ahh, well that's a bummer. Best sport ever. You could try and find a club, but they are usually pretty expensive.
well I could probably find enough people to start a team....but so far as I know, the game is nowhere near as popular in AMerica than it is over there......plus......In band, Time is a thing we don't have extra.
Yeah, it unfortunately isn't. people are too fascinated by girly man sports like football
The football coach at our school HATES the rugby team cuz all his players like rugby better. About a quarter of last year's varsity team isn't playing this year cuz they're playing rugby
rubiksnoob wrote:
ahh, well that's a bummer. Best sport ever. You could try and find a club, but they are usually pretty expensive.
well I could probably find enough people to start a team....but so far as I know, the game is nowhere near as popular in AMerica than it is over there......plus......In band, Time is a thing we don't have extra.
Yeah, it unfortunately isn't. people are too fascinated by girly man sports like football
The football coach at our school HATES the rugby team cuz all his players like rugby better. About a quarter of last year's varsity team isn't playing this year cuz they're playing rugby
Well, from what little I know of Rugby, comparing it to foot ball is like,
Two hand tag football or
BLOOD BOWL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
So I think Rugby wins
When I was in Jr. High I was bullied a lot. I tried everything that the teachers and school administrators and my parents told me to do to stop it.
It did not work.
Then, one morning I hit a bully as hard as I possibly could. I think that he was shocked and suprised. He tried it again one time after that and I hit him again.
Didn't have any trouble after that.
Moral: Ask them to stop in language that they will understand clearly.
I used to be the victim of bullying, usually during elementary school. That changed pretty fast. I was one of those guys who would give you trouble if you came to them looking for it. I was the dirtiest fighter of my time, I've used every trick in the book, and I came to be respected for that.
I was bullied pretty bad my freshman year. On my first day of school in my first class I was the first person to arrive. The second was a girl. I said hello to her, she spit on my open history book. I called her a bitch under my breath. That afternoon a senior -- the school's quarterback, who was a foot taller and 50 pounds heavier than me - grabbed me after school and informed me that I had called his girlfriend a bitch. He tried to push me around, but I stood up for myself and gave a good show of it. So he called his friends over, and four guys beat the snot out of me.
That became pretty much a daily occurrence. There was a long ditch that ran alongside the school, I got thrown in there -- with its three feet of slimy, trash-filled water -- at least once a week. I lost 8 or more backpacks in one year, couldn't own books, couldn't keep anything in my lockers. If I talked to someone and they didn't walk away, they got beat up. So no one talked to me. Ever.
After a few months this new kid showed up at school, and I struck up a conversation with him. It was my birthday, and he had a car, suggested we go drive up to Taco Bell at lunch. I was like "Cool, I'm making a friend." We got in his car and he drove me to a nearby parking lot, where a dozen guys -- the football team plus some hangers on -- were waiting. They opened the car door, pulled me out so that I was hanging upside down, tangled in the seatbelt, and started taking turns kicking me in the head, chest and throat, while slamming the car door on me. I broke two ribs, lost two teeth, and not a single person was even so much as suspended. They all vouched for each other. Nobody was there.
Yeah. That's enough. It was bad. I spent most of the years between 14 and 16 (when I finally changed schools) just wanting to die. Columbine happened shortly after I graduated, and I mostly felt sorry for the killers, and thanked God I didn't have access to real weapons. Because there were a lot of days I woke up and just wanted to hurt the people who were hurting me.
But years later, after a lot of therapy, I'm mostly over it. Mostly. Still can't fething stand bullies though. Don't have much respect for the people who just stand by and do nothing about it either.
Automatically Appended Next Post:
Commissar NIkev wrote:Well, from what little I know of Rugby, comparing it to foot ball is like,
Two hand tag football or
BLOOD BOWL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
So I think Rugby wins
Compared to real football, rugby is a pansy sport. Footballers have to wear all that gear because if they didn't they would die. Seriously. Two 300 pound guys slamming into each other as fast and as hard as they can, that will totally break bones. Like in the neck. If you took the dirtiest, low-down nasty rugby players and sent them up against the Detroit Lions, or god forbid the Dallas Cowboys, you'd have a dead rugby team by first down. Those little rugby scrums look all vicious and nasty, but they simply do not hit each other with the kind of power and force that is every single hit in American football.
(And I say this as a person who fething loathes American football and thinks its the most tedious game ever invented by man.)
The thing about bullies is that you don't have to run faster than the bully, you just have to run faster than the slowest nerd.
Or, put differently, you just have to be less appealing than somebody else. Everyone gets bullied at some point, but I didn't deal with much. I was always tall, which helps. When I was a Freshman in HS, two sophomores were walking past me in the hall, and one shouldered me out of the way. I told him to 'watch it' or somesuch. He said 'Oh, man, are we gonna have to teach you a lesson?' I said something like 'I guess so.' They just sorta huffed off and never did anything. I didn't act tough, I didn't act scared, I just sorta didn't do much of anything, and it just wasn't interesting enough for them.
I broke two ribs, lost two teeth, and not a single person was even so much as suspended. They all vouched for each other. Nobody was there.
Jesus Christ, dude. No wonder you think the world is out to get you. Apparently for the duration of your high school experience, they actually were.
Do you have any insight at all as to why they hated you so much? I never really witnessed such unexplained cruelty in high school. People were certainly cruel, but they usually had some sort of rationalization for it. If a kid just sat there and took it, they'd usually get bored and look for somebody who would fight back, but not very well.
Compared to real football, rugby is a pansy sport. Footballers have to wear all that gear because if they didn't they would die.
It's actually sort of the reverse of that. Because they have all those pads on, they can generally hit each other at speeds that would not be possible otherwise. The problem is that when you're playing at that level, and things go wrong, people get paralyzed.
It's not really that they're so much bigger, stronger or faster than top level rugby players, it's that they're playing with gear that lets them hit a lot harder. So, man to man, they're probably pretty similar. But, yeah, if you let a football team in full pads go after a rugby team in their normal kit, they'd be injured pretty quickly.
I got bullied quite a bit when I was in primary school. We moved around a lot, and I was always the nerdy kid, so there was never really a "We're tired of screwing with him." phase.
Eventually, my parents got tired of dealing with the associated issues and basically told me that I had to learn how to handle these issues myself. That was a blessing in the sense that it toughened me up (I was always really soft as a kid), and a curse in that it turned me into a bully for a couple of years. But, after I learned the limits of propriety, and we moved again, I didn't have nearly as many problems. Yeah, there was some ostracism in junior high for being the chubby kid who was good at school, but that dropped away when I got to high school and started getting into sports.
On football vs. Rugby: Phryxis has the right of it, though I'll also add that football players don't have to train nearly as much for endurance. As such, they're almost always, pound-for-pound, quicker and more powerful than Rugby players. The trade off being, obviously, that they can't maintain the same level of exertion for as long.
Gailbraithe wrote:I was bullied pretty bad my freshman year. On my first day of school in my first class I was the first person to arrive. The second was a girl. I said hello to her, she spit on my open history book. I called her a bitch under my breath. That afternoon a senior -- the school's quarterback, who was a foot taller and 50 pounds heavier than me - grabbed me after school and informed me that I had called his girlfriend a bitch. He tried to push me around, but I stood up for myself and gave a good show of it. So he called his friends over, and four guys beat the snot out of me.
That became pretty much a daily occurrence. There was a long ditch that ran alongside the school, I got thrown in there -- with its three feet of slimy, trash-filled water -- at least once a week. I lost 8 or more backpacks in one year, couldn't own books, couldn't keep anything in my lockers. If I talked to someone and they didn't walk away, they got beat up. So no one talked to me. Ever.
After a few months this new kid showed up at school, and I struck up a conversation with him. It was my birthday, and he had a car, suggested we go drive up to Taco Bell at lunch. I was like "Cool, I'm making a friend." We got in his car and he drove me to a nearby parking lot, where a dozen guys -- the football team plus some hangers on -- were waiting. They opened the car door, pulled me out so that I was hanging upside down, tangled in the seatbelt, and started taking turns kicking me in the head, chest and throat, while slamming the car door on me. I broke two ribs, lost two teeth, and not a single person was even so much as suspended. They all vouched for each other. Nobody was there.
Yeah. That's enough. It was bad. I spent most of the years between 14 and 16 (when I finally changed schools) just wanting to die. Columbine happened shortly after I graduated, and I mostly felt sorry for the killers, and thanked God I didn't have access to real weapons. Because there were a lot of days I woke up and just wanted to hurt the people who were hurting me.
But years later, after a lot of therapy, I'm mostly over it. Mostly. Still can't fething stand bullies though. Don't have much respect for the people who just stand by and do nothing about it either.
Woah, that's fething grim. Sorry that happened to you, man.
@Phyrxis - I don't think it's particularly helpful to say 'why did they hate you so much?' - all internet squabbling aside, I can't imagine anything Gailbraithe could have done that would be so bad as to deserve such a beating. It's pretty tasteless to try and score points off it.
If that's not what you're doing then I apologise, but it could certainly be taken that way.
Gailbraithe wrote:I was bullied pretty bad my freshman year. On my first day of school in my first class I was the first person to arrive. The second was a girl. I said hello to her, she spit on my open history book. I called her a bitch under my breath. That afternoon a senior -- the school's quarterback, who was a foot taller and 50 pounds heavier than me - grabbed me after school and informed me that I had called his girlfriend a bitch. He tried to push me around, but I stood up for myself and gave a good show of it. So he called his friends over, and four guys beat the snot out of me.
That became pretty much a daily occurrence. There was a long ditch that ran alongside the school, I got thrown in there -- with its three feet of slimy, trash-filled water -- at least once a week. I lost 8 or more backpacks in one year, couldn't own books, couldn't keep anything in my lockers. If I talked to someone and they didn't walk away, they got beat up. So no one talked to me. Ever.
After a few months this new kid showed up at school, and I struck up a conversation with him. It was my birthday, and he had a car, suggested we go drive up to Taco Bell at lunch. I was like "Cool, I'm making a friend." We got in his car and he drove me to a nearby parking lot, where a dozen guys -- the football team plus some hangers on -- were waiting. They opened the car door, pulled me out so that I was hanging upside down, tangled in the seatbelt, and started taking turns kicking me in the head, chest and throat, while slamming the car door on me. I broke two ribs, lost two teeth, and not a single person was even so much as suspended. They all vouched for each other. Nobody was there.
Yeah. That's enough. It was bad. I spent most of the years between 14 and 16 (when I finally changed schools) just wanting to die. Columbine happened shortly after I graduated, and I mostly felt sorry for the killers, and thanked God I didn't have access to real weapons. Because there were a lot of days I woke up and just wanted to hurt the people who were hurting me.
But years later, after a lot of therapy, I'm mostly over it. Mostly. Still can't fething stand bullies though. Don't have much respect for the people who just stand by and do nothing about it either.
Automatically Appended Next Post:
Commissar NIkev wrote:Well, from what little I know of Rugby, comparing it to foot ball is like,
Two hand tag football or
BLOOD BOWL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
So I think Rugby wins
Compared to real football, rugby is a pansy sport. Footballers have to wear all that gear because if they didn't they would die. Seriously. Two 300 pound guys slamming into each other as fast and as hard as they can, that will totally break bones. Like in the neck. If you took the dirtiest, low-down nasty rugby players and sent them up against the Detroit Lions, or god forbid the Dallas Cowboys, you'd have a dead rugby team by first down. Those little rugby scrums look all vicious and nasty, but they simply do not hit each other with the kind of power and force that is every single hit in American football.
(And I say this as a person who fething loathes American football and thinks its the most tedious game ever invented by man.)
Gailbraithe Is that you? You're back!?! I haven't seen you in such a long time on DakkaDakka. There was even a thread that talked about how much we missed you.
I've only had a handfull of experiences with being bullied and it was never a group which bullied me. Come to think of it, bullying didn't happen much at all at any of the schools I went to. Usually what would happen is I'd get made fun of, I would talk back and the bully would threaten to beat me up. I take a step forward, tell him to get started, stare at him for a minute then go about my business.
Only once did it ever go beyond words. The guy starting throwing stuff at me like yogurt, half eaten fruit, ketchup, etc. One time walking home from school he covered me with shaving gel. After a few weeks, once I realized this game wasn't gonna get boring to him, I walked up to him and told him if he didn't stop I was gonna punch him in the face. He didn't take it seriously I guess because he did it again and I carried through with my threat. I was left alone after that.
From my limited experience, a bully working alone relies on his ability to intimidate. Calling him out on his threats or fighting back with your words or fists (if it ever goes that far) will end it right then and there. A group of bullies is a totally different beast.
I was pretty much bullied till my junior year. Senior year not at all(cept by friends. but it was all fun and games) I was bullied becuase i was an outcast. I sometime wish i could habe beat them but then i would be in worse trouble then the guy bulling me. The bulling and teasing has what had made me so insecure and unable to ask out someone for a date and stuff like that. afraid of being made fun of if i did.
Gailbraithe wrote:
Automatically Appended Next Post:
Commissar NIkev wrote:Well, from what little I know of Rugby, comparing it to foot ball is like,
Two hand tag football or
BLOOD BOWL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
So I think Rugby wins
Compared to real football, rugby is a pansy sport. Footballers have to wear all that gear because if they didn't they would die. Seriously. Two 300 pound guys slamming into each other as fast and as hard as they can, that will totally break bones. Like in the neck. If you took the dirtiest, low-down nasty rugby players and sent them up against the Detroit Lions, or god forbid the Dallas Cowboys, you'd have a dead rugby team by first down. Those little rugby scrums look all vicious and nasty, but they simply do not hit each other with the kind of power and force that is every single hit in American football.
(And I say this as a person who fething loathes American football and thinks its the most tedious game ever invented by man.)
Well you have to take into account that those two 300 pound guys would proably have a hard time running a mile under 8 minutes. Even the biggest fowards in professional rugby have way higher endurance than your typical NFL lineman. If yout took the Cowboys and had them play against a team like the All Blacks or Springboks, you would have a dead football team by the first half.
A rugby game is 80 minutes of continous play. By the end of that your 300 pound linemen would have all died of exhaustion, heart attack, what have you.
Mr Mystery wrote:Hmmm. If I'm right, then it's the armour in Girlsball that allows the more aggressive play, rather than the aggressive play coming first?
Allow Rugby players to wear girly armour, and they'll be hitting each other with their legs. After they've been ripped off.
Exactly. Couldn't have put it better myself my good sir.
Gailbraithe wrote:
Automatically Appended Next Post:
Commissar NIkev wrote:Well, from what little I know of Rugby, comparing it to foot ball is like,
Two hand tag football or
BLOOD BOWL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
So I think Rugby wins
Compared to real football, rugby is a pansy sport. Footballers have to wear all that gear because if they didn't they would die. Seriously. Two 300 pound guys slamming into each other as fast and as hard as they can, that will totally break bones. Like in the neck. If you took the dirtiest, low-down nasty rugby players and sent them up against the Detroit Lions, or god forbid the Dallas Cowboys, you'd have a dead rugby team by first down. Those little rugby scrums look all vicious and nasty, but they simply do not hit each other with the kind of power and force that is every single hit in American football.
(And I say this as a person who fething loathes American football and thinks its the most tedious game ever invented by man.)
Well you have to take into account that those two 300 pound guys would proably have a hard time running a mile under 8 minutes. Even the biggest fowards in professional rugby have way higher endurance than your typical NFL lineman. If yout took the Cowboys and had them play against a team like the All Blacks or Springboks, you would have a dead football team by the first half.
A rugby game is 80 minutes of continous play. By the end of that your 300 pound linemen would have all died of exhaustion, heart attack, what have you.
Not quite. The rugby team would be in the hospital by the 3rd down due to massive trauma. Some may show signs of being partially eaten as well.
If it's a question of physical toughnes, rugby players definitely win. Not only are professional rugby players super strong, they can also run circles around your typical football player.
And mental toughness also goes to the rugby players. We've had guys play with broken arms and still kick the gak out of the other team. My friend's dad played in south africa and he played with a fractured verterbra. Never seen a football player do that.
Automatically Appended Next Post:
Frazzled wrote:
rubiksnoob wrote:
Gailbraithe wrote:
Automatically Appended Next Post:
Commissar NIkev wrote:Well, from what little I know of Rugby, comparing it to foot ball is like,
Two hand tag football or
BLOOD BOWL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
So I think Rugby wins
Compared to real football, rugby is a pansy sport. Footballers have to wear all that gear because if they didn't they would die. Seriously. Two 300 pound guys slamming into each other as fast and as hard as they can, that will totally break bones. Like in the neck. If you took the dirtiest, low-down nasty rugby players and sent them up against the Detroit Lions, or god forbid the Dallas Cowboys, you'd have a dead rugby team by first down. Those little rugby scrums look all vicious and nasty, but they simply do not hit each other with the kind of power and force that is every single hit in American football.
(And I say this as a person who fething loathes American football and thinks its the most tedious game ever invented by man.)
Well you have to take into account that those two 300 pound guys would proably have a hard time running a mile under 8 minutes. Even the biggest fowards in professional rugby have way higher endurance than your typical NFL lineman. If yout took the Cowboys and had them play against a team like the All Blacks or Springboks, you would have a dead football team by the first half.
A rugby game is 80 minutes of continous play. By the end of that your 300 pound linemen would have all died of exhaustion, heart attack, what have you.
Not quite. The rugby team would be in the hospital by the 3rd down due to massive trauma. Some may show signs of being partially eaten as well.
There aren't downs in rugby frazz continuous play means continuous play.
rubiksnoob wrote:If it's a question of physical toughnes, rugby players definitely win. Not only are professional rugby players super strong, they can also run circles around your typical football player.
And mental toughness also goes to the rugby players. We've had guys play with broken arms and still kick the gak out of the other team. My friend's dad played in south africa and he played with a fractured verterbra. Never seen a football player do that.
Automatically Appended Next Post:
Frazzled wrote:
rubiksnoob wrote:
Gailbraithe wrote:
Automatically Appended Next Post:
Commissar NIkev wrote:Well, from what little I know of Rugby, comparing it to foot ball is like,
Two hand tag football or
BLOOD BOWL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
So I think Rugby wins
Compared to real football, rugby is a pansy sport. Footballers have to wear all that gear because if they didn't they would die. Seriously. Two 300 pound guys slamming into each other as fast and as hard as they can, that will totally break bones. Like in the neck. If you took the dirtiest, low-down nasty rugby players and sent them up against the Detroit Lions, or god forbid the Dallas Cowboys, you'd have a dead rugby team by first down. Those little rugby scrums look all vicious and nasty, but they simply do not hit each other with the kind of power and force that is every single hit in American football.
(And I say this as a person who fething loathes American football and thinks its the most tedious game ever invented by man.)
Well you have to take into account that those two 300 pound guys would proably have a hard time running a mile under 8 minutes. Even the biggest fowards in professional rugby have way higher endurance than your typical NFL lineman. If yout took the Cowboys and had them play against a team like the All Blacks or Springboks, you would have a dead football team by the first half.
A rugby game is 80 minutes of continous play. By the end of that your 300 pound linemen would have all died of exhaustion, heart attack, what have you.
Not quite. The rugby team would be in the hospital by the 3rd down due to massive trauma. Some may show signs of being partially eaten as well.
There aren't downs in rugby frazz continuous play means continuous play.
Blah Blah our kickers are bigger than your largest players. Our linemen have been mistaken for Mack Trucks, and thats just my boy's high school football team (seriously its front line averages 305 lbs).
rubiksnoob wrote:If it's a question of physical toughnes, rugby players definitely win. Not only are professional rugby players super strong, they can also run circles around your typical football player.
What position are we talking about?
I mean, if you're comparing a Rugby player to someone like Vince Wilfork you're probably right. Someone like Troy Palomalu or Randy Moss I'm not so sure.
I was bullied once. It was pretty bad, and I still have the behavioural tics left over from it. You know, the difficulty of looking anyone in the eye, that sort of thing.
Well, it sort of ended in the beginning of year 8 (not sure what that is in the US) when the arse behind it decided it would be funny to attempt to beat me up with his friends watching after school. I guess he just pushed it a little too far, 'cause I snapped and ended up throttling him. His friends broke it up, and he left, crying about how he was "leaving because he was the bigger man."
I'm still slightly ashamed that I tried to strangle him, but I guess it had got so far that it was inevitable I'd snap.
Phryxis wrote:Do you have any insight at all as to why they hated you so much? I never really witnessed such unexplained cruelty in high school. People were certainly cruel, but they usually had some sort of rationalization for it. If a kid just sat there and took it, they'd usually get bored and look for somebody who would fight back, but not very well.
They didn't hate me. When it started, I fought back -- my dad is a Green beret, he taught me how to defend myself, and not to brag but I've never lost a fight that was one-on-one -- and that only made them come after me harder. I actually embarrassed and humiliated quite a few of them when they made the mistake of not ganging up on me. And I didn't take it quietly. These guys would come at me four or five at a time, and every time I would loudly point out that only a bunch of chickenshit cowards would attack a (already smaller) guy four to one. And I would say things like "Does pushing me around make up for your feelings of inadequacy about your small dick?" and the like.
So, you know, I made for an entertaining victim. It's basically the same reason people like you and dogma keep starting gak with me. You're the kind of person who thinks that an "entertaining" response to harassment and antagonism justifies the harassment and antagonism. You want to know why bullies bully? Look inside yourself, you know the answer.
But the reason it just never stopped and kept going on was two-fold: 1) these guys were mostly all on the football team, and 2) the principal was the former football coach and a huge supporter of the team. So basically his response to me getting attacked was to blame me and suspend me, and what that did was send a message to these kids that bullying me was acceptable. And because high school is stressful for everyone, and because the school administrators had basically said "beat the gak out of this kid every day, and we'll only punish him for it," beating me up became an outlet for their stress. At some point it stopped being about anything, there wasn't any reason. It was its own reason, it was just habit.
A few years ago I was walking down a street and this car pulled up alongside me, and it was one of these guys. And at first I got scared, but he just wanted to apologize for how he'd treated me. And I asked him why he'd done it -- I mean, I had never even talked to this guy except when he was attacking me, and had never done anything to him -- and he didn't know. He did it because its what they did. Because, when you get right down to it, human beings are gak. Unless people make a real effort to be good, they're just gak.
It's just how human societies function. Rather than deal with their own gak, people find a scapegoat and attack that. In high school, it's some kid. As grown ups, our stressed-out bullies become Republicans and attack gay people's right to marry, or attack the poor, or troll forums from anominity (if they're particularly cowardly). Anything to avoid dealing with the real problems that actually cause the stress, which would generally require going after people with actual power.
Cheesecat wrote:Gailbraithe Is that you? You're back!?! I haven't seen you in such a long time on DakkaDakka. There was even a thread that talked about how much we missed you.
Blame killkrazy. He's the one who keeps banning me for responding to dogma and Phyrxis's BS.
Not to seem an arse, but can we please not have a flamewar in here? It would be kinda ironic, considering the nature of the thread.
*ducks from any possible flak*
Monster Rain wrote:You reported me... for what, exactly? For pointing out that you're again attempting to derail a thread with personal attacks?
You're certifiable, bro.
Last time I checked, my handle is not "G-bizzle," bro. You want to disrespect me and start gak with me, at least be a man and own up to it. Don't sit there and act like you aren't trying to start gak.
oh my god this thread is pitiful. Never been a bully, never been bullied. Bullies don't exist in my area. Something about the good mix of blacks, whites, hispanics and asians makes everyone kosher. We just don't have them. Everyone gets along.
Anyone else have this sort of thing? I could never understand why people put up with bullies. ing stab them in the ******* throat if they don't quit bothering you. Light them on fire. Show them you ain't sweet. What's wrong with you? Don't you keep a knife on you?
I guess it could be considered somewhat ironic, the direction this thread's taken, but everyone needs to take a deep breath, calm down and stop the personal attacks.
Alpharius wrote:ALL Moderation on this sight is handled PRIVATELY, for the most part.
Yeah, that's a bad idea. It only makes the moderation prone to corruption. There should be a forum where moderators announce all warnings, bannings and suspensions, and allow for public comments. RPG.net has a good example of such a system. There should also be a means of removing mods from power.
Unless of course y'all are afraid of a little democracy...
Yes, there are public warnings but aside from that you WILL NOT KNOW if someone has been warned, suspended or banned.
If they continue posting, then it's fairly clear they haven't been banned. That's why I know that dogma and Phryxis haven't been banned for all the times they have baited me into flamewars.
Samus_aran115 wrote:oh my god this thread is pitiful. Never been a bully, never been bullied. Bullies don't exist in my area. Something about the good mix of blacks, whites, hispanics and asians makes everyone kosher. We just don't have them. Everyone gets along.
Anyone else have this sort of thing? I could never understand why people put up with bullies. ing stab them in the ******* throat if they don't quit bothering you. Light them on fire. Show them you ain't sweet. What's wrong with you? Don't you keep a knife on you?
I'm not sure whether you're joking or not...
If you aren't, then why not? Clearly you have little idea of how hard to escape bullying can be come.
If you are, then damn, you had me there.
Samus_aran115 wrote:oh my god this thread is pitiful. Never been a bully, never been bullied. Bullies don't exist in my area. Something about the good mix of blacks, whites, hispanics and asians makes everyone kosher. We just don't have them. Everyone gets along.
Anyone else have this sort of thing? I could never understand why people put up with bullies. ing stab them in the ******* throat if they don't quit bothering you. Light them on fire. Show them you ain't sweet. What's wrong with you? Don't you keep a knife on you?
I'm not sure whether you're joking or not...
I am indeed. About the last two sentences. The rest is real
Depending on the bully...A stabbing would probably be the best option. Or brass Knuckles....There's only so far you can get with words or bare fists
Samus_aran115 wrote:oh my god this thread is pitiful. Never been a bully, never been bullied. Bullies don't exist in my area. Something about the good mix of blacks, whites, hispanics and asians makes everyone kosher. We just don't have them. Everyone gets along.
Anyone else have this sort of thing? I could never understand why people put up with bullies. ing stab them in the ******* throat if they don't quit bothering you. Light them on fire. Show them you ain't sweet. What's wrong with you? Don't you keep a knife on you?
I'm not sure whether you're joking or not...
I am indeed. About the last two sentences. The rest is real
Depending on the bully...A stabbing would probably be the best option. Or brass Knuckles....There's only so far you can get with words or bare fists
Hmmm... gonna have to disagree there. Bullying might seem like a little thing for people who haven't experienced it, but when it happens to you it's nowhere near as easy to break out of. Sure, if we were all Conan the Barbarian (and who wouldn't want to be now and again?) it would be easy to take the bullies apart, but not all of us are that confident or indeed competent when it comes to standing up for ourselves.
I've always been kind of a loner, so I got bullied a bit in 5th and 6th grade for being awkward, tall, and wearing glasses. That all stopped in 7th grade when topped 6 ft and became captain of the football team.
That's true. Maybe hanging out with black people my entire childhood's made me tougher or something. I forget that not everyone gets that adrenaline pumping before a punch is even thrown.
I've had one bullying situation in my entire life. This guy was trying to shake me down for my mp3 player (back when they were new, not an iPod). He had been basically bothering me the whole day and I was just sick of it. He basically tapped me on my shoulder(I was walking away from him), I rounded on him and slammed my elbow into his nose. The next thing I knew, he was on the floor and I'd basically smashed his face in. I proceeded to finish the job by kicking him in the crotch a couple times with the heel of my shoe. Never heard from him again, and never been in a fight again. Standing up for yourself totally works
Alpharius wrote:ALL Moderation on this sight is handled PRIVATELY, for the most part.
Yeah, that's a bad idea. It only makes the moderation prone to corruption. There should be a forum where moderators announce all warnings, bannings and suspensions, and allow for public comments. RPG.net has a good example of such a system. There should also be a means of removing mods from power.
Unless of course y'all are afraid of a little democracy...
Yes, there are public warnings but aside from that you WILL NOT KNOW if someone has been warned, suspended or banned.
If they continue posting, then it's fairly clear they haven't been banned. That's why I know that dogma and Phryxis haven't been banned for all the times they have baited me into flamewars.
Uh, in case you were confused, DAKKA DAKKA is NOT a democracy.
Basically it's all the same word for a right-wing fascist echo-chamber where virtuous truth-tellers are ostracized and mocked until the boo-hoo comes out of their cry-cry.
I think the problem here is that G-Man is a nice guy and has a lot to contribute, but he's quite outspoken about his views/beliefs/etc. and can sometimes tick people off.
When this happens some people tend to jump down his throat for it, which is kind of uncalled for. But hey, this is the interwebs. You get all kinds.
Gailbraithe gets understandably upset about this, but that's just the way some posters are here. And sometimes a really convoluted and technical answer (dogma) could be easily misinterpreted and this leads to more bickering etc.
So basically it boils down to both sides over reacting to perceived offenses which leads to actual intended offenses which is just not cool.
I gotta admit, I haven't been the nicest guy to you Gailbraithe, and I apologize. I was a douche. Sorry man.
rubiksnoob wrote:I think the problem here is that G-Man is a nice guy and has a lot to contribute, but he's quite outspoken about his views/beliefs/etc. and can sometimes tick people off.
You can be outspoken about your beliefs. You, for example, have been on the opposite side of a few arguments from me and I don't think you're a bad guy. Quite the contrary, actually.
There's a difference between saying "I believe X" and saying "I believe X and everyone that doesn't is a Nazi, fascist slow that should be put to death."
rubiksnoob wrote:I think the problem here is that G-Man is a nice guy and has a lot to contribute, but he's quite outspoken about his views/beliefs/etc. and can sometimes tick people off.
You can be outspoken about your beliefs. You, for example, have been on the opposite side of a few arguments from me and I don't think you're a bad guy. Quite the contrary, actually.
There's a difference between saying "I believe X" and saying "I believe X and everyone that doesn't is a Nazi, fascist slow that should be put to death."
True. That really is not the best way to express one's opinions.
To be fair, i took a lot of flak in primary school because i was hugely different.
I moved up to secondary and it got worse, so i moved school and developed have a really cutting tomgue and the ability to laugh at people when they hit me, yeah scary when the runt you punched full force laughs at you.
I also had the better you than me policy so i rarely helped others out cos when i did always turned out worse for me.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Bullying, yep, I was bully'd pretty badly when I was younger, first day of grade seven, had the crap kicked out of me by a grade 9 student, then spent the next two years hiding in the library each break so he wouldn't get me, although he delighted in throwing his elbow in my face as we passed in the corridoor, when he left year 10 I though I was free, so i ventured into the yard again only to become the victim of more bully's constant name calling and shoving but not too bad like the last guy, until i snapped and lashed out to make them stop....bad idea, now i was the skinny crying kid that they got a reaction from! so it just went on and on until i left grade ten, although in my break between schools i was attacked by a gang of youths in a local store and damaged some bones in my face and jaw and eye sockets, not much luck hey? al because I was skinny and quiet and kept to myself, now i've learnt the secret is self confidence! yes that's right! get some now! I looked at the people doing this and the people they didn't mess with so I took it apon myself to re create my life, I shaved my head (tough guys have shaved heads) I grew a beard (tough guys have beards) I worked out and drank protein shakes every day (tough guys are buff) and then i started doing martial arts (tough guys...anyway) so in the end I went from a skinny quiet kid with a boy band haircut, to someone who had confidence and looked like they knew how to handle themselves and in reality I probably did, but deep down i was still the kid who doesn't like confrontation and was sick of being picked on, some people just need to bully someone to feel whole, they need the rush of being 'better' than someone, I saw one of my tormentors years after, and when he saw me all i said to him was "I do believe I owe you a beating from when we went to school?" and smiled, the look on his face was priceless! he ended up working at my work for a few years but was always super friendly towards me, so is bullying a kids thing? or do we each have our own methods for getting to the light at the end of the bullying tunnel? and how do we stop it? is it getting worse for the youth of today? I( was lucky but i keep hearing about the poor kids/adults who take their own life because of someone else and no one should feel that helpless, if I had children who were being bullied I wouldn't hesitate to push the envelope and confront the bully's and the parents until it was resolved. if I could i'd become an advocate for anti bullying behavior I don't think it has a place in todays society, it was a hell of a decade for me and I wouldn't wish it apon anyone, I do have to say though that I wouldn't be who I was and as strong if I didn't have to fight my way through the pain it caused, but it still isn't good, fun or right.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Almost my story, but....it started in Jr. High School with the same group of bullies all the way untill 11th grade. These guys hung around in a big group of about 30 skin heads and picked on just about everyone they saw. I was there pet project because they could get away with murder as the Principals and Councilers at my schools were well worthless. So in 10th grade or so these guys corner me in the locker room after PE and stat pushing me and this other kid around. Well this upset me as the other kid was about 5 ft, 86 lbs soaking wet and was cornered in the shower in a 5 on 1 situation. I choose the biggest strongest guy in the group, grabbing him by his neck and back of the pants and ran him down the locker dials about 10 ft and throw him face first into the tiled wall with a loud bloody crack. I turned around and looked at these 4 guys, their jaws dropped to the floor and said "Ok he is done...Who is next?" I can tell you this, they ran faster than I have ever seen anyone run in my life out of the locker room. This now lone bully (Eric) was on the ground nose busted up and back in pain looked up at me and said that I would pay for what I did. 2-weeks later (Eric and his buddies who were in my auto-shop class started in on me and again I get angry (tossing my desk across the room awaking the sleeping teacher who looked like a ghost). I said yet again "I said stop it!" The Teacher did not care that these guys were teasing me and 4 other people in class that day he sent me to the priciples office. After school at the bike rack I was ambushed by Eric and his buddies from behind (was pushed over the bike rack and was stomped by the 5 guys). Latter that night I saw Eric at the local pizza place playing a video game alone (evil smile) I then jumped him from behind and gave him the beating of his life in the store, I then dodged out the back door as the police arrived. I procceded to hunt down every bully in that group on my terms 1 on 1 and beat them harshly. After all that was over no one wanted to mess with me again. I meet Eric at my 20th reunion the guy liked anarexic, balding and saw me at my best all 6ft 2, 215lb finest decked out in my Army uniform, me being in the armed forces for a long time. He ran out of the hotel just as fast as I remember 20 yrs ago and I just smiled and everyone there clapped.
If that's not what you're doing then I apologise, but it could certainly be taken that way.
I didn't mean it that way. I simply meant that when people ambush somebody and beat them, it's pretty much because they hate them. I don't mean to lend any credibility to their opinion, but I think they made their opinion pretty clear.
When it started, I fought back -- my dad is a Green beret, he taught me how to defend myself, and not to brag but I've never lost a fight that was one-on-one -- and that only made them come after me harder.
Yeah, that explains it then. A bully is most interested in somebody who will respond in a way that makes them feel justified in their cruelty. If you fight back, particularly if you have some success in fighting back, that's very appealing to them.
So basically his response to me getting attacked was to blame me and suspend me, and what that did was send a message to these kids that bullying me was acceptable.
Yeah, I can see how that would make you distrustful of basically everything. All I can tell you is that most people don't get mistreated in the way you're describing, and you should always seek to purge that poison from your outlook. It really reads in your posts that you have had your outlook conditioned by those bad experiences, and while it's understandable, it's also to your benefit to deny it any control over you today.
For example:
Because, when you get right down to it, human beings are gak.
It really doesn't help you much to spend too much time thinking like this. We all do it, but it still doesn't help. There's a lot of good going on, and it sounds like you would benefit from focusing your attention on the positives.
As grown ups, our stressed-out bullies become Republicans and attack gay people's right to marry, or attack the poor, or troll forums from anominity (if they're particularly cowardly).
Like I said, dude, don't let past experiences poison you. You came in here with a chip on your shoulder. It sounds like you have a very good reason for having it, but it's not our responsibility, nor really in our power, to know your life history. All we can see is a guy who shows up and starts calling everyone racist, etc. etc.
You think everyone is gak, but you never really gave this forum much of a chance to treat you otherwise. I know you persist in believing it's just me and dogma, but everyone was seeing how aggressive, insulting, irrational you were being. Given the backstory you provide, it's really a bit heartbreaking.
But, at the same time, I tried to take our disagreements to PM, precisely so you WOULDN'T get ganged up on. Somehow you managed to make it happen anyway. You're really locked into a pattern here, and you've got to break out of it. Just let go of all the hate. Real easy for me to say, not having to deal with it, but it's still the right answer.
rubiksnoob wrote:I think the problem here is that G-Man is a nice guy and has a lot to contribute, but he's quite outspoken about his views/beliefs/etc. and can sometimes tick people off.
You can be outspoken about your beliefs. You, for example, have been on the opposite side of a few arguments from me and I don't think you're a bad guy. Quite the contrary, actually.
There's a difference between saying "I believe X" and saying "I believe X and everyone that doesn't is a Nazi, fascist slow that should be put to death."
I have never said anyone who doesn't believe what I believe is a fascist, a slow or should be put to death. You can't find a single example of me doing anything at all like that. You haven't quite come out and said that I have, but your implication is clear: You believe that I have, and thus that I am a bad guy, and thus that I deserve to have people like you jump down my throat every single time I post (which is pretty much exactly what you, Monster Rain, have done -- even in this thread!).
What I have said is that I believe that the American conservative movement is fascist, and thus that American movement conservatives are fascists. As a movement conservative, I can understand why you would be hostile to that belief, and I can even understand why it would motivate you to be constantly rude to me, to misrepresent what I've said, and to create ad hoc justifications for why the "Be Polite" rule shouldn't apply to you and your conservative buddies. But to be clear, I have never once argued that you or anyone else is a fascist because they disagree with me. If you disagree with me, I simply think you're wrong. Which is only natural, since if I didn't think I was right, I would change my position.
rubiksnoob wrote:I think the problem here is that G-Man is a nice guy and has a lot to contribute, but he's quite outspoken about his views/beliefs/etc. and can sometimes tick people off.
You can be outspoken about your beliefs. You, for example, have been on the opposite side of a few arguments from me and I don't think you're a bad guy. Quite the contrary, actually.
There's a difference between saying "I believe X" and saying "I believe X and everyone that doesn't is a Nazi, fascist slow that should be put to death."
I have never said anyone who doesn't believe what I believe is a fascist, a slow or should be put to death. You can't find a single example of me doing anything at all like that. You haven't quite come out and said that I have, but your implication is clear: You believe that I have, and thus that I am a bad guy, and thus that I deserve to have people like you jump down my throat every single time I post (which is pretty much exactly what you, Monster Rain, have done -- even in this thread!).
What I have said is that I believe that the American conservative movement is fascist, and thus that American movement conservatives are fascists. As a movement conservative, I can understand why you would be hostile to that belief, and I can even understand why it would motivate you to be constantly rude to me, to misrepresent what I've said, and to create ad hoc justifications for why the "Be Polite" rule shouldn't apply to you and your conservative buddies. But to be clear, I have never once argued that you or anyone else is a fascist because they disagree with me. If you disagree with me, I simply think you're wrong. Which is only natural, since if I didn't think I was right, I would change my position.
Conservatism isn't Fascism they're not even related other than they're both right and ideologies (one way more than the other but I'll let you decide which is which). Conservatism is a political and social philosophy that promotes the maintenance
of traditional institutions and supports minimal and gradual change in society. Fascism however is a radical and authoritarian nationalist political ideology, seeking to organize a country to corporatist perspectives, values, and systems, including the
political system and the economy. Saying American Conservatives are Fascists would be about as factually correct as saying Communism is a democracy, you're comparing apples to oranges.
LordWynne wrote:----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Bullying, yep, I was bully'd pretty badly when I was younger, first day of grade seven, had the crap kicked out of me by a grade 9 student, then spent the next two years hiding in the library each break so he wouldn't get me, although he delighted in throwing his elbow in my face as we passed in the corridoor, when he left year 10 I though I was free, so i ventured into the yard again only to become the victim of more bully's constant name calling and shoving but not too bad like the last guy, until i snapped and lashed out to make them stop....bad idea, now i was the skinny crying kid that they got a reaction from! so it just went on and on until i left grade ten, although in my break between schools i was attacked by a gang of youths in a local store and damaged some bones in my face and jaw and eye sockets, not much luck hey? al because I was skinny and quiet and kept to myself, now i've learnt the secret is self confidence! yes that's right! get some now! I looked at the people doing this and the people they didn't mess with so I took it apon myself to re create my life, I shaved my head (tough guys have shaved heads) I grew a beard (tough guys have beards) I worked out and drank protein shakes every day (tough guys are buff) and then i started doing martial arts (tough guys...anyway) so in the end I went from a skinny quiet kid with a boy band haircut, to someone who had confidence and looked like they knew how to handle themselves and in reality I probably did, but deep down i was still the kid who doesn't like confrontation and was sick of being picked on, some people just need to bully someone to feel whole, they need the rush of being 'better' than someone, I saw one of my tormentors years after, and when he saw me all i said to him was "I do believe I owe you a beating from when we went to school?" and smiled, the look on his face was priceless! he ended up working at my work for a few years but was always super friendly towards me, so is bullying a kids thing? or do we each have our own methods for getting to the light at the end of the bullying tunnel? and how do we stop it? is it getting worse for the youth of today? I( was lucky but i keep hearing about the poor kids/adults who take their own life because of someone else and no one should feel that helpless, if I had children who were being bullied I wouldn't hesitate to push the envelope and confront the bully's and the parents until it was resolved. if I could i'd become an advocate for anti bullying behavior I don't think it has a place in todays society, it was a hell of a decade for me and I wouldn't wish it apon anyone, I do have to say though that I wouldn't be who I was and as strong if I didn't have to fight my way through the pain it caused, but it still isn't good, fun or right.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Almost my story, but....it started in Jr. High School with the same group of bullies all the way untill 11th grade. These guys hung around in a big group of about 30 skin heads and picked on just about everyone they saw. I was there pet project because they could get away with murder as the Principals and Councilers at my schools were well worthless. So in 10th grade or so these guys corner me in the locker room after PE and stat pushing me and this other kid around. Well this upset me as the other kid was about 5 ft, 86 lbs soaking wet and was cornered in the shower in a 5 on 1 situation. I choose the biggest strongest guy in the group, grabbing him by his neck and back of the pants and ran him down the locker dials about 10 ft and throw him face first into the tiled wall with a loud bloody crack. I turned around and looked at these 4 guys, their jaws dropped to the floor and said "Ok he is done...Who is next?" I can tell you this, they ran faster than I have ever seen anyone run in my life out of the locker room. This now lone bully (Eric) was on the ground nose busted up and back in pain looked up at me and said that I would pay for what I did. 2-weeks later (Eric and his buddies who were in my auto-shop class started in on me and again I get angry (tossing my desk across the room awaking the sleeping teacher who looked like a ghost). I said yet again "I said stop it!" The Teacher did not care that these guys were teasing me and 4 other people in class that day he sent me to the priciples office. After school at the bike rack I was ambushed by Eric and his buddies from behind (was pushed over the bike rack and was stomped by the 5 guys). Latter that night I saw Eric at the local pizza place playing a video game alone (evil smile) I then jumped him from behind and gave him the beating of his life in the store, I then dodged out the back door as the police arrived. I procceded to hunt down every bully in that group on my terms 1 on 1 and beat them harshly. After all that was over no one wanted to mess with me again. I meet Eric at my 20th reunion the guy liked anarexic, balding and saw me at my best all 6ft 2, 215lb finest decked out in my Army uniform, me being in the armed forces for a long time. He ran out of the hotel just as fast as I remember 20 yrs ago and I just smiled and everyone there clapped.
Cool story Bro.
I would've just left his contact information on 4chan and let people have fun with it, or possibly just personally delivered CP to his email address.Something internetz related
rubiksnoob wrote:I think the problem here is that G-Man is a nice guy and has a lot to contribute, but he's quite outspoken about his views/beliefs/etc. and can sometimes tick people off.
You can be outspoken about your beliefs. You, for example, have been on the opposite side of a few arguments from me and I don't think you're a bad guy. Quite the contrary, actually.
There's a difference between saying "I believe X" and saying "I believe X and everyone that doesn't is a Nazi, fascist slow that should be put to death."
I have never said anyone who doesn't believe what I believe is a fascist, a slow or should be put to death. You can't find a single example of me doing anything at all like that. You haven't quite come out and said that I have, but your implication is clear: You believe that I have, and thus that I am a bad guy, and thus that I deserve to have people like you jump down my throat every single time I post (which is pretty much exactly what you, Monster Rain, have done -- even in this thread!).
What I have said is that I believe that the American conservative movement is fascist, and thus that American movement conservatives are fascists. As a movement conservative, I can understand why you would be hostile to that belief, and I can even understand why it would motivate you to be constantly rude to me, to misrepresent what I've said, and to create ad hoc justifications for why the "Be Polite" rule shouldn't apply to you and your conservative buddies. But to be clear, I have never once argued that you or anyone else is a fascist because they disagree with me. If you disagree with me, I simply think you're wrong. Which is only natural, since if I didn't think I was right, I would change my position.
I'm not inclined to go through your posting history for crazy things, they're there for anyone who wants to read them that doesn't already know what you're all about. I really don't have time to play around on the internet arguing with you,
I have to go to a Fascist cocktail party at Sean Hannity's house, and I have to pick up Oliver North and Ann Coulter on the way over. I won't be calling you on your bad behavior anymore, I'll just report it to the moderators and save myself the cringing that comes from reading your posts.
rubiksnoob wrote:I think the problem here is that G-Man is a nice guy and has a lot to contribute, but he's quite outspoken about his views/beliefs/etc. and can sometimes tick people off.
You can be outspoken about your beliefs. You, for example, have been on the opposite side of a few arguments from me and I don't think you're a bad guy. Quite the contrary, actually.
There's a difference between saying "I believe X" and saying "I believe X and everyone that doesn't is a Nazi, fascist slow that should be put to death."
I have never said anyone who doesn't believe what I believe is a fascist, a slow or should be put to death. You can't find a single example of me doing anything at all like that. You haven't quite come out and said that I have, but your implication is clear: You believe that I have, and thus that I am a bad guy, and thus that I deserve to have people like you jump down my throat every single time I post (which is pretty much exactly what you, Monster Rain, have done -- even in this thread!).
What I have said is that I believe that the American conservative movement is fascist, and thus that American movement conservatives are fascists. As a movement conservative, I can understand why you would be hostile to that belief, and I can even understand why it would motivate you to be constantly rude to me, to misrepresent what I've said, and to create ad hoc justifications for why the "Be Polite" rule shouldn't apply to you and your conservative buddies. But to be clear, I have never once argued that you or anyone else is a fascist because they disagree with me. If you disagree with me, I simply think you're wrong. Which is only natural, since if I didn't think I was right, I would change my position.
I'm not inclined to go through your posting history for crazy things, they're there for anyone who wants to read them that doesn't already know what you're all about. I really don't have time to play around on the internet arguing with you,
I have to go to a Fascist cocktail party at Sean Hannity's house, and I have to pick up Oliver North and Ann Coulter on the way over. I won't be calling you on your bad behavior anymore, I'll just report it to the moderators and save myself the cringing that comes from reading your posts.
Please don't I don't want Gailbraithe to get banned again.
Cheesecat wrote:Conservatism isn't Fascism they're not even related other than they're both right and ideologies (one way more than the other but I'll let you decide which is which). Conservatism is a political and social philosophy that promotes the maintenance of traditional institutions and supports minimal and gradual change in society. Fascism however is a radical and authoritarian nationalist political ideology, seeking to organize a country to corporatist perspectives, values, and systems, including the political system and the economy. Saying American Conservatives are Fascists would be about as factually correct as saying Communism is a democracy, you're comparing apples to oranges.
No, you're claiming that the American conservative movement is conservative. It is not. The American conservative movement is not conservative at all, it is in fact extremely radical -- the changes it seeks are neither minimal nor gradual, but quite the opposite. Nor does it seek to promote the maintenance of traditional institution -- it seeks to destroy the very institutions that helped America dominate the 20th century.
Combining bronze age social morality, neo-liberal (or neo-conservative, same thing) foreign policy, and anarcho-capitalism economic theory, which is precisely what the modern conservative movement does, is not maintaining American traditions. It is bucking them entirely.
Monster Rain wrote:I'm not inclined to go through your posting history for crazy things, they're there for anyone who wants to read them that doesn't already know what you're all about. I really don't have time to play around on the internet arguing with you, G-donkulous.
If you don't have the time to argue with me, then stop taking your precious time to attack me. If you're not willing to back up lies you're telling about me, then stop telling lies.
I have to go to a Fascist cocktail party at Sean Hannity's house, and I have to pick up Oliver North and Ann Coulter on the way over. I won't be calling you on your bad behavior anymore, I'll just report it to the moderators and save myself the cringing that comes from reading your posts.
The American conservative movement is not conservative at all, it is in fact extremely radical -- the changes it seeks are neither minimal nor gradual, but quite the opposite.
You realize that this is really not very helpful, right?
A dozen times, or more, I've seen you suggest that the "American conservative movement" is in fact "fascist. Then some random sucker, who hasn't seen how this always turns out, says "no it's not." And then, by way of counter argument, you say "yes it is," but with lots of colorful and slightly awkward prose.
That's not helpful.
We know you think it is. But when challenged, you generally just say "IT IS" in even more embellished, infuriated tones.
It's just not very productive. If you enjoy it, that's cool... But I just want to be clear, you're not actually providing any support for your assertions, you're just restating them more and more vehemently.
This is really how you approach pretty much everything. You also have opinions about what is good government, but when asked to explain it, you never seem to explain the actual detail of what needs to be done. It's just how "liberalism is really what makes America strong," again, said with varying degrees of agitation and frustration.
Gailbraithe wrote:It's basically the same reason people like you and dogma keep starting gak with me.
For the record, I came down on you because I thought that you tended to bully people while making poor arguments.
Gailbraithe wrote:That's why I know that dogma and Phryxis haven't been banned for all the times they have baited me into flamewars.
Sweet, sweet irony.
Gailbraithe wrote:But to be clear, I have never once argued that you or anyone else is a fascist because they disagree with me. If you disagree with me, I simply think you're wrong. Which is only natural, since if I didn't think I was right, I would change my position.
Yeah, right, you've never explicitly said that those who disagree with you are fascists (though you did try to force a similar dichotomy in the Blood Dolphins thread). Very few people, bar deliberate trolls, would do such a thing.
Unfortunately, what you explicitly state is not the sum of what you mean. You've already outlined one position by which you have created the means by which those who disagree with you would be considered fascists. After all, if you think that movement Conservatives are fascists, and a movement Conservative disagrees, then he must be doing so because he is a fascist. At least per your argument.
Now, that isn't necessarily a bad thing. After all, there are cases in which people do disagree with you simply because they like something. For example, an argument over whether or not ice cream is good. The problem is that movement Conservatism isn't very much like ice cream, its members don't seem to particularly like fascism. Therefore, when you call a movement Conservative a fascist, you aren't simply saying 'movement Conservatism is crap' you're equating movement Conservatism with something that movement Conservatives don't like. That's a nice rhetorical technique, but it isn't particularly useful in the course of rational debate, which you seem to so highly prize. If you believe that movement Conservatism is a fascist movement, then you must argue to that effect. You cannot simply say it is so. In the absence of such an explanation people are left to wonder as to why you are equating the two, and many will immediately conclude that its simply a disparagement on grounds of disagreement; explicit statement or no.
I've been in this boat myself, it sucks when people read things into your argument that you didn't put there. But the answer isn't to disparage them, and call them jack-booted thugs. The answer is to explain you meaning more effectively.
Also, I believe that you tend to lump everyone into the 'Conservative' category out of a general spite, rather than a tendency towards accurate categorization. I'm not a conservative, for example. I'm almost certainly more conservative than you, but I'm not a conservative. I'm less conservative than both Monster Rain, and Phryxis for example.
Automatically Appended Next Post:
Gailbraithe wrote:neo-liberal (or neo-conservative, same thing) foreign policy,
No, not at all. Neo-liberals embrace institutions. Neo-conservatives reject them on principal. Neo-conservatism is realism + moral judgments.
Gailbraithe wrote:
Censorship is the last refuge of the scoundrel.
The American conservative movement is not conservative at all, it is in fact extremely radical -- the changes it seeks are neither minimal nor gradual, but quite the opposite.
You realize that this is really not very helpful, right?
A dozen times, or more, I've seen you suggest that the "American conservative movement" is in fact "fascist. Then some random sucker, who hasn't seen how this always turns out, says "no it's not." And then, by way of counter argument, you say "yes it is," but with lots of colorful and slightly awkward prose.
That's not helpful.
We know you think it is. But when challenged, you generally just say "IT IS" in even more embellished, infuriated tones.
I actually have explained exactly why I think that, and you were involved in that conversation (its where we started this little kerfluffle), but if you need a reminder, here you go.
Fascism is hard to define precisely, and no two fascist movements are ever exactly the same. But they have some common properties.
Fascism movements are always sexually repressive. They oppose rights for women. They condemn homosexuality. They are obsessively concerned with what people do in their bedrooms, even when they are hypocritically libertine. The modern conservative movement is extremely homophobic, always ranting about the dreaded "gay agenda," and fiercely anti-woman. They seek to strip away women's right to control their own reproduction, making it the government's business to insure that every baby born of even rape and incest makes it into the world. Fascism movements are racist and nationalistic. This can be seen in the right's assault on immigrants and Muslims as dangerous, predatory threats to "real Americans," to white, Christian Americans.
Fascism movements are anti-democratic and opposed to parlimentary democracy. This can be seen in the increasing refusal of the GOP to play ball with the democratically elected majority, and in the threats of far-right candidates like Sharron Angle to seek out "second amendment remedies" should they not win at the ballot box.
Fascist movements are anti-labor. They attack the left as dangerously socialist or communist, they attack labor unions and worker's rights, they attack anything that goes against the will of their corporate overlords. Which brings us naturally to: Fascist movements are corporatist. Mussolini wrote that a better name for fascism would be corporatism. The movement is supported almost entirely by a handful of extremely wealthy industrialists, and it is the agenda of those industrialists that the movement is primarily interested in advancing (throwing women, gays, Muslims and immigrants under the bus is just a means to an end).
There is more, but those are the big points. The conservative movement is made up primarily of disillusioned and dissatisfied middle class workers who want someone to blame for their vague feeling that they've been screwed, and the leadership of the conservative movement is a bunch of corporate lackeys willing to feed them women, gays and minorities in order to secure their vote to advance a radical pro-corporate, oligarchic agenda. And that is fascism. That is what you call a political movement that uses fear of the powerless (gays, immigrants, muslims, women) to turn people who have lost power (the white middle class) into supporters of the very policies that have disempowered them (corporatism).
Automatically Appended Next Post:
dogma wrote:
Gailbraithe wrote:Censorship is the last refuge of the scoundrel.
Says the man who places people on ignore.
Seriously? And people wonder why I dismiss you as completely disingenuous.
That I choose to ignore your blather is not a form of censorship at all, dogma, and I'm 100% certain you already know that. Me putting you on ignore only prevents me from hearing you, it doesn't prevent you from speaking. Which is what getting someone banned does.
But you just keep on demonstrating why I don't think you're worth talking to.
Gailbraithe wrote:
Seriously? And people wonder why I dismiss you as completely disingenuous.
If I were to be labeled as disingenuous I would have to be one who put others on ignore. I've never done that to anyone.
Gailbraithe wrote:
That I choose to ignore your blather is not a form of censorship at all, dogma, and I'm 100% certain you already know that. Me putting you on ignore only prevents me from hearing you, it doesn't prevent you from speaking. Which is what getting someone banned does.
Your comment was clearly limited to speech with respect to Dakka. After all, it isn't as if your ban would affect your ability to speak otherwise.
It is disingenuous to propose that censorship, the ignorance of certain speech given a certain context, is bad if you choose to ignore certain speech given a certain context.
It would be much easier to presume that censorship is not always bad. Of course, Critical Race Theory already supposes that.
Regardless, it is illustrative that you chose to respond only to my euphemistic dig.
Oh, and hey, if you want me to avoid you don't mention me specifically.
dogma wrote:If I were to be labeled as disingenuous I would have to be one who put others on ignore. I've never done that to anyone.
You don't know what disingenuous means, do you?
It is disingenuous to propose that censorship, the ignorance of certain speech given a certain context, is bad if you choose to ignore certain speech given a certain context.
Ignoring someone is not censorship. It's just not, dogma. You know its not the same thing. EVERYONE knows that its not the same thing. Your right to speak does not mean I have to listen, and me choosing to ignore you is not any kind of censorship at all. Censorship has noting to do with "ignorance of certain speech given a certain context." Interesting use of ignorance there.
This is why you aren't worth talking to. You're being ridiculous. Censorship is not refusing to listen to someone, censorship is denying them the ability to speak.
Seriously, man. What the feth are you trying to accomplish here? What is the point of this nonsense? What do you hope to accomplish with this idiotic, patently false and ridiculous argument you're trying to make? I thought you were supposed to be the smarty-smarty college educated philosophy major, and this is the nonsense you choose to post? This complete bullshrimp claiming that ignoring someone is the same as censoring them?
No, dogma, that's wrong. That's not even a little bit right. That's just dumb. It's really just a stupid thing to try to argue, and I am giving you the benefit of the doubt when I assume that you are being disingenuous. Because if you aren't being disingenuous, then you really don't understand that this argument of yours is fething slowed idiocy. It's just a giant stinking pile of stupid.
And I assume that you're bright enough to know that, and that you are presenting this argument in the hopes of bullshitting your way towards scoring a point against me, and that you are hoping that you can simply baffle everyone with BS and they'll assume you know what you're talking about. But if that's not the case, and you really think you're making a reasonable argument when you sit there and claim that ignoring someone is a form of censorship, then you aren't disingenous. You also overpaid for your education, because you're clearly brain dead.
So you want to stand by this? You want to keep claiming that ignoring someone is censoring them?
Actually, I don't care. You're a waste of my time.
For feth sake people, take your political banterings to another thread, I am pretty sure this is not what the OP intended it to be. I understand what you are going for here, but you are both getting across as being dumbasses. Seriously, who the gives a about you two and your views of censorship when all you do is flinging gak at eachother. You are belittling the topic you are trying to convey and I am quite sure anyone with any common sense are already trying to ignore you. Trying...
Get your semi-political banter the out of here and into another thread, we are discussing bullying here in what was a serious fashion. You screwed it up. You fail.
Edit: @Arctik_Firangi - Who the heck is Godwin, and how did he become this thread?
I have had bullies since i was in primary 1 , now im in S1 and still bullied every day of every week im at school I have difficulty mainly cuase I don't play sport like Warhammer 40k and i play chess and I am "diffrent" . A girl tried to trip me down the stairs cause i askded her to stop kicking my chair .
Gailbraithe wrote:
You don't know what disingenuous means, do you?
Lacing in candor, according to Merriam-Webster. It can also mean calculating, or free from simple frankness; which is your choice?
Gailbraithe wrote:
Ignoring someone is not censorship. It's just not, dogma.
It is when 'ignore' removes that which you dislike from view.
Gailbraithe wrote:
Censorship has noting to do with "ignorance of certain speech given a certain context." Interesting use of ignorance there.
This is why you aren't worth talking to. You're being ridiculous. Censorship is not refusing to listen to someone, censorship is denying them the ability to speak.
You're denying my ability to speak to you, or so it seems. Apparently you feel the need to engage in disputes regarding methodology.
Gailbraithe wrote:
Seriously, man. What the feth are you trying to accomplish here?
What are you? You have, yet again, ignored the academic disputes that I have posed to you.
Gailbraithe wrote:
What is the point of this nonsense? What do you hope to accomplish with this idiotic, patently false and ridiculous argument you're trying to make? I thought you were supposed to be the smarty-smarty college educated philosophy major, and this is the nonsense you choose to post? This complete bullshrimp claiming that ignoring someone is the same as censoring them?
Yeah, that's what happens when you only quote the snark. Good job, dude. If you want to actually engage me, feel free. I'm all ears. I would love to hear your actual take on Singer.
Gailbraithe wrote:
No, dogma, that's wrong. That's not even a little bit right. That's just dumb. It's really just a stupid thing to try to argue, and I am giving you the benefit of the doubt when I assume that you are being disingenuous. Because if you aren't being disingenuous, then you really don't understand that this argument of yours is fething slowed idiocy. It's just a giant stinking pile of stupid.
And I assume that you're bright enough to know that, and that you are presenting this argument in the hopes of bullshitting your way towards scoring a point against me, and that you are hoping that you can simply baffle everyone with BS and they'll assume you know what you're talking about. But if that's not the case, and you really think you're making a reasonable argument when you sit there and claim that ignoring someone is a form of censorship, then you aren't disingenous. You also overpaid for your education, because you're clearly brain dead.
So you want to stand by this? You want to keep claiming that ignoring someone is censoring them?
Actually, I don't care. You're a waste of my time.
Stand by what? You haven't disputed anything. All you've done here is behave as a bully. I mean, it's fun to push people around; especially on the internet. But it really doesn't mount an argument.
You can keep calling me names, or you can addres smy objections to your arguments.
Well, i've grown accustomes to bullies and bullying, as i've lived in a pretty bad neighborhood until i was about 20. Since we were kids, we used to bully each other and start fights all the time from things that now seem so largely irrelevant (laundry clips were the usual motive, yes we would fight for those ))...
However, i always stood up for myself and never let any bullying attempt go unanswered. We all did so. And though the other kids i used to hang up with (as i said, we were bullying each other as well), would pick on the other smaller weaker kids, i never did that, but i never helped them either.
Then, in high-school, my social skills and the fact that i never lacked self-confidence got me hanging out with the bullies group. Again, i never bullied anyone, but i also didn't stand up for them.
College, all the same.
Recognize the pattern? Just as people said before, if you are perceived as weak, people WILL pick on you. If you stand up for yourself, it will usually stop. Yes, i did get beaten for standing up for myself, but i never kept my mouth shut or my fists unclenched. This stuff really helped.
I don't defend bullies, i don't approve to their behaviour at all, but i also don't approve to those getting bullied without fighting back. Even if you're 20 pounds lighter than your nemesis, you can still throw a punch or two. Yes, you may get beaten. Yes, it may hurt. Yes, it may happen again. But it will definitely send a message, not just to the bullies, but to the other kids as well.
Remember people, if you are in doubt, just kick him in the ballz. Peace!
Gailbraithe wrote:
Ignoring someone is not censorship. It's just not, dogma.
It is when 'ignore' removes that which you dislike from view.
No, it's not.
And I honestly don't care if this gets me banned again: Dogma, if you really believe that choosing not to listen to someone is that same thing as denying them the ability to speak, then you are an idiot. The very fact that you were able to post this nonsense despite the fact that I have you on ignore is proof that you are not being censored. There is no way to get around that. Either you know your argument is bullcrap, or you are a very stupid person. There are no other options.
And now, out of respect to everyone else, I am not engaging you further on this incredibly stupid point.
You're not listening to me? If that is so, then why are you replying to me?
Censoring is the process of examining things in order to determine that which should be removed; eg. certain (key concept there) things are censored in Iran, but no in the US (eg. in certain circumstances certain opinions are omitted by force while others are permitted). You exercise censorship; especially in ignoring people. The ignore function on Dakka being the point in question here, not ignorance in general. Thought that was clear, but maybe not.
Incidentally, the other possibility is that you are wrong, and I'm actually correcting you. You should have accounted for that; poor form.
Sport class is a god send for those that get bullied, expesialy with sports like rugby where we all run at each other noone see's hits coming, and boy does soccor even up the field i love me a slied tackle i got a kid to do two flips and a sumersault once, where i come from it's all verbal till someone blows a wistle, we all take some but we give it back.
Ryan Hyde wrote:Sport class is a god send for those that get bullied, expesialy with sports like rugby where we all run at each other noone see's hits coming, and boy does soccor even up the field i love me a slied tackle i got a kid to do two flips and a sumersault once, where i come from it's all verbal till someone blows a wistle, we all take some but we give it back.
I'd argue that. I hated P.E. as during stuff like Rugby, they had a carte blanche to knock seven shades out of me, calling it a 'tackle'.
Thread derailments are never fun. I can pretty confidently say that this one is heading towards lock-death. Which is sad, I enjoyed reading other people's experience with this.
Samus_aran115 wrote:Also agreed. Couldn't this had turned into a thread about a giraffe? Giraffes cannot possibly start conflict..*waits*
Yes they CAN !!!
Like most mammals, Giraffes can be seen to have instances of bullying occurring in their loose groupings. However, it is widely recognised that this is not quite the same as bullying between humans, due to the latter's sentience and therefore greater capacity for cruelty. It is there, though.
Samus_aran115 wrote:Also agreed. Couldn't this had turned into a thread about a giraffe? Giraffes cannot possibly start conflict..*waits*
Yes they CAN !!!
Here ya go.
Automatically Appended Next Post: Since this thread is dying anyway...I translated a random post. Guess who's it is:
スポーツクラスは、神のようなラグビー我々は誰もお互いにすべてのランさんが来てヒットを参照してくださいここで、スポーツ、特に、そのいじめられる方に送信され、少年は分野でも交流サッカーをしていない私は子供は、2つを行うようになった私に取り組むのスライドを私に愛してとフリップ私はそれから来る度宙返りは、笛、我々はすべてのいくつかを取る人が吹くまで、すべての言語を見るが、我々は戻ってそれを与える。
Vargtass wrote:Thread derailments are never fun. I can pretty confidently say that this one is heading towards lock-death. Which is sad, I enjoyed reading other people's experience with this.
Same here, It made me feel better about what happened to me becuase much more worse stuff happened to other people.
I mean, most of the bullying that happened to me was what people did and didn't say, which I learned to just shut out by the time I was in 7th grade. I feel really lucky that the only really physical bullying I got was the afformentioned choking incident.
Gorskar.da.Lost wrote:Like most mammals, Giraffes can be seen to have instances of bullying occurring in their loose groupings. However, it is widely recognised that this is not quite the same as bullying between humans, due to the latter's sentience and therefore greater capacity for cruelty. It is there, though.
The same sort of behaviour can be seen in primates as well and is linked to their position within the pecking order of the group.
Gorskar.da.Lost wrote:Like most mammals, Giraffes can be seen to have instances of bullying occurring in their loose groupings. However, it is widely recognised that this is not quite the same as bullying between humans, due to the latter's sentience and therefore greater capacity for cruelty. It is there, though.
The same sort of behaviour can be seen in primates as well and is linked to their position within the pecking order of the group.
However, given that social standing in Humans is a great deal more complex than this, it is arguable that bullying behaviour is a throwback to our more primitive origins, when it would help sort out who was in charge. Of course, there are more reasons for it than that, such as the temperament and personality of the individual, and the circumstances under which the bullying begins.
Monster Rain wrote:Well, the second post G-Bizzle makes calls someone a pathetic dork, out of nowhere.
It wasn't out of nowhere. But I fixed it for you.
And Killkrazy is a tyrant for banning you?
No, but he is a bad moderator for not also banning Phyrxis and dogma.
And you.
I mean, here you are, trying to start gak with me. Breaking Rule #1. I've just reported you. Watch what happens.
It'll be nothing.
I am noting for the record Killkrazy's pathetic attempt to usurp the title of Worst Mod Evah! wil lavail him not. I have, and always shall be, the King!
chowderhead13 wrote:I'm Scared. Will Frazzled kill me?
Maybe. He might blow you up first, but keep you within a centimeter of your life. After you're out of the hospital, he'll blow it up. You'll be the only survivor and the police will blame you for it. Then you go to jail and frazzled visits you and gives you a plasma pistol to the face. Game over man. Game over.
chowderhead13 wrote:I'm Scared. Will Frazzled kill me?
Maybe. He might blow you up first, but keep you within a centimeter of your life. After you're out of the hospital, he'll blow it up. You'll be the only survivor and the police will blame you for it. Then you go to jail and frazzled visits you and gives you a plasma pistol to the face. Game over man. Game over.
Gailbraithe wrote:
Automatically Appended Next Post:
Commissar NIkev wrote:Well, from what little I know of Rugby, comparing it to foot ball is like,
Two hand tag football or
BLOOD BOWL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
So I think Rugby wins
Compared to real football, rugby is a pansy sport. Footballers have to wear all that gear because if they didn't they would die. Seriously. Two 300 pound guys slamming into each other as fast and as hard as they can, that will totally break bones. Like in the neck. If you took the dirtiest, low-down nasty rugby players and sent them up against the Detroit Lions, or god forbid the Dallas Cowboys, you'd have a dead rugby team by first down. Those little rugby scrums look all vicious and nasty, but they simply do not hit each other with the kind of power and force that is every single hit in American football.
(And I say this as a person who fething loathes American football and thinks its the most tedious game ever invented by man.)
Well you have to take into account that those two 300 pound guys would proably have a hard time running a mile under 8 minutes. Even the biggest fowards in professional rugby have way higher endurance than your typical NFL lineman. If yout took the Cowboys and had them play against a team like the All Blacks or Springboks, you would have a dead football team by the first half.
A rugby game is 80 minutes of continous play. By the end of that your 300 pound linemen would have all died of exhaustion, heart attack, what have you.
Not quite. The rugby team would be in the hospital by the 3rd down due to massive trauma. Some may show signs of being partially eaten as well.
As for the American football vs. rugby debate, I'd just like to say that any NFL team that had the Haka done in front of them would gak their pants and run crying to their mommies.
First high school I went to I was on the BBall team so I didn't get messed with. Second high school I went to everyone thought I played football so I didn't get messed with.
chowderhead13 wrote:I'm Scared. Will Frazzled kill me?
Maybe. He might blow you up first, but keep you within a centimeter of your life. After you're out of the hospital, he'll blow it up. You'll be the only survivor and the police will blame you for it. Then you go to jail and frazzled visits you and gives you a plasma pistol to the face. Game over man. Game over.
Excellent although there's a severe lack of weiner dogs and extremely gifted ladies on it. Where's my Brazilian Bikini team!
Automatically Appended Next Post:
rubiksnoob wrote:
Frazzled wrote:
rubiksnoob wrote:
Gailbraithe wrote:
Automatically Appended Next Post:
Commissar NIkev wrote:Well, from what little I know of Rugby, comparing it to foot ball is like,
Two hand tag football or
BLOOD BOWL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
So I think Rugby wins
Compared to real football, rugby is a pansy sport. Footballers have to wear all that gear because if they didn't they would die. Seriously. Two 300 pound guys slamming into each other as fast and as hard as they can, that will totally break bones. Like in the neck. If you took the dirtiest, low-down nasty rugby players and sent them up against the Detroit Lions, or god forbid the Dallas Cowboys, you'd have a dead rugby team by first down. Those little rugby scrums look all vicious and nasty, but they simply do not hit each other with the kind of power and force that is every single hit in American football.
(And I say this as a person who fething loathes American football and thinks its the most tedious game ever invented by man.)
Not quite, I know at least one hgh school team that would just open up with high caliber weapons for disrespecting them...
Well you have to take into account that those two 300 pound guys would proably have a hard time running a mile under 8 minutes. Even the biggest fowards in professional rugby have way higher endurance than your typical NFL lineman. If yout took the Cowboys and had them play against a team like the All Blacks or Springboks, you would have a dead football team by the first half.
A rugby game is 80 minutes of continous play. By the end of that your 300 pound linemen would have all died of exhaustion, heart attack, what have you.
Not quite. The rugby team would be in the hospital by the 3rd down due to massive trauma. Some may show signs of being partially eaten as well.
As for the American football vs. rugby debate, I'd just like to say that any NFL team that had the Haka done in front of them would gak their pants and run crying to their mommies.
Automatically Appended Next Post:
Monster Rain wrote:
This guy made my walks to and from school a living nightmare.
No wonder. The guys has beaver on his head. Dude you were bullied by freaking Daniel Boone!
Yeah, that happened. Even then, 
. Hard. Her nose broke pretty fairly. Suddenly the teachers cared and I was picked up by the cops and was expelled. Joined the army, served, went back to another school and finished. Never heard from that poor girl again, but the one I punched is a fashion blogger now and makes the big bucks. Life sucks, but I guess I wouldn't have been able to live with myself if I hadn't done anything.
I still wake up screaming in the night. The horror... the horror...
