American sailors put the beat down on pirates

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**Frazzled**

Americans 1, Pirates 0

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/7990566.stm

Hijacked US crew 'retake vessel'

The pirates used small boats to attack the vessel for several hours
The US crew of a ship hijacked by pirates off the coast of Somalia has retaken control of the vessel, according to Pentagon sources.

Unnamed US defence officials said one pirate had been captured by the crew of the Maersk Alabama, seized earlier in the Indian Ocean.

But the vessel's Danish owners, Maersk, said they could not confirm that the crew had fought off the pirates.

It was the sixth ship seized off Somalia in recent days.

The Associated Press quoted a defence official as saying: "The crew is back in control of the ship.

"It's reported that one pirate is on board under crew control - the other three were trying to flee."

Reports suggest the other three pirates jumped overboard.

Maersk's chief executive, John Reinhart, said he could not confirm that the ship had been retaken, but told AFP news agency he believed the crew was safe.

The ship was attacked by several small boats in the early hours of Wednesday in an incident apparently lasting for about five hours.

Maritime officials said the vessel took all possible evasive action before it reported that the pirates had boarded.

More than 130 pirates attacks, including close to 50 successful hijackings, were reported in 2008, threatening one of the world's busiest shipping lanes.

Now all we have to do is re-arm Old Ironsides with fine recoilless rifles and give the pirates a propoer beat down. I myself would contribute $50 to the cause to unbundle the Texas and Alabama and drop some ordnance battleship style on these guys. Put it on Pay per View.

**George Spiggott**

Frazzled wrote:...Put it on Pay per View.

Arguably the most genius/stupid idea ever. I'd watch thit show every night and pay for the privelige. It'd be awsome.

*sings* Bad boys, bad boys what'ya gonna do...

Piss off Big Brother Celebrity Special, Pirate Hunt's in town.

**Frazzled**

George Spiggott wrote:
Frazzled wrote:...Put it on Pay per View.

Arguably the most genius/stupid idea ever. I'd watch thit show every night and pay for the privelige. It'd be awsome.

*sings* Bad boys, bad boys what'ya gonna do...

Piss off Big Brother Celebrity Special, Pirate Hunt's in town.

Yes Cops has nothing on a battleship firing 14 inch rifles. If you need the close in effect, move the B ships close and take them out with the old school 40mm cannon.

Sorry son, all that RPG's going to do is scratch the paint. And then we'll be mad. Real mad.

As staed, alternatively take the old guns off the Ironsides and replace them with some surplus 75mm Sherman tank cannon. heck, we could pull the Lexington our of mothballs in Corpus Christi and have it go after the pirates with genuine WWII Helldivers and Corsairs. After all, nothing say 'we care' like dive bombers coming at you at 80 degrees...

**Wolfstan**

Just let the SBS & Seals loose for that up close and personnal touch

**Frazzled**

No way. Amwerica is about firepower. We should ram their dinghy with an aircraft carrier. Now thats overkill.

I still like the idea of refurbishing a WWII aircraft carrier and sending out dive bombers to deal with the situation. Actually they'd be pretty good -slower flying scout plans ascertain targets and Corsairs strafe them with 20mm cannon. Bring a destroyer or two along to open up with those old school 5 in deck guns.

**malfred**

Lars Ulrich is a sailor?!

Now I've heard everything.

**Polonius**

Am the only person whose wondering how the hell this keeps happening? Seriously, we don't we just have a naval presence there, or bomb their little shantytowns, or whatever it is we need to do to stop this stuff?

**sexiest_hero**

No can't bomb thier towns. And no we can't watse billions in fire power to re arm old ships, and re train dive bombers, to try and hit a fast moving moterboat.

Use some simple tact fellas.

Sail through a shipping boat, let the pirates on board and give them the cargo.

Oh, the cargo is about 20 overly armed American Commandos.

Name the ship the Spainish Inquisition. Nobody expects that.

**Belphegor**

Polonius: Am the only person whose wondering how the hell this keeps happening? Seriously, we don't we just have a naval presence there, or bomb their little shantytowns, or whatever it is we need to do to stop this stuff?

It's because they've been fighting fair. They haven't been killing, just jacking.
Unless your suggesting state authorized genocide of all the population of their nation, bombing them would just create more people with nothing to lose that hate use.
Which an energy inefficient means that doesn't achieve the desired end, stopping the piracy. (with the exception of genocide)
Doing something to boast their economy would do more.
Give someone a solid means to earn a living and they'll take it.
Since right now, a pirate takes more risk and earns less than any of us.

**smiling Assassin**

My late Grandad used to captain an Oil Tanker around the world from Portsmouth, mainly in Asia though. As such, he was attacked by Pirates loads of times (think about it, this is Merchant Navy during the War, the biggest military loss of life in the Allied Countries. Crazy statistic.)

For some reason he kept his Lee Enfield in his Cabin's safe, but for gak's and giggle's be pulled out the water cannon.

Yeah fool! Run!

Navy 1
Angry Chinese people 0

sA

**ShumaGorath**

ITT kneejerk reactions and a lack of any sort of seriousness.

**Frazzled**

Belphegor wrote:
Polonius: Am the only person whose wondering how the hell this keeps happening? Seriously, we don't we just have a naval presence there, or bomb their little shantytowns, or whatever it is we need to do to stop this stuff?
It's because they've been fighting fair. They haven't been killing, just jacking.
Unless your suggesting state authorized genocide of all the population of their nation, bombing them would just create more people with nothing to lose that hate use.
Which an energy inefficient means that doesn't achieve the desired end, stopping the piracy. (with the exception of genocide)
Doing something to boast their economy would do more.
Give someone a solid means to earn a living and they'll take it.
Since right now, a pirate takes more risk and earns less than any of us.

You know there's a bit of space between bending over and taking it in the rear, and wiping out the entire population.

Mine their coast. Blockade their coast.
Obliterate everything within five miles of the shoreline.
Air bomb them with videos of Dr. Quinn, Medicine Woman.
All kinds of options are available. If the freeking british could do it we could do it. Heck the Marines were literally born in one of our first pirate wars-we're old hands at this.
Its a joke nothing has been done at this point.

**Wolfstan**

And just what happened last time your country was involved in Somali? Hmmm... hold on a mo, oh yes, "Blackhawk Down". It's cosmic karma, bandy arsed natives, wearing clashing coloured clothes and armed with RPG's are an accident waiting to happen for the US. They

'd you over when their mode of transport was a Toyota pick up, they are now in the maritime equivalent of the pick up. I have no doubt you will wipe hundreds out, but I guarantee you one of those little buggers will do a 'Deathstar' on your biggest and shiniest ship.

**sexiest_hero**

Wolfstan makes a point. Nomatter how good you are,, bad tactics=fail.

**Frazzled**

Wolfstan wrote:And just what happened last time your country was involved in Somali? Hmmm... hold on a mo, oh yes, "Blackhawk Down". It's cosmic karma, bandy arsed natives, wearing clashing coloured clothes and armed with RPG's are an accident waiting to happen for the US. They 'd you over when their mode of transport was a Toyota pick up, they are now in the maritime equivalent of the pick up. I have no doubt you will wipe hundreds out, but I guarantee you one of those little buggers will do a 'Deathstar' on your biggest and shiniest ship.

Thats why you don't go ashore dorkboy.

1. Don't be nice this time. Don't try to keep people from starving or generally being good guys. Do what we do best-blow stuff up.
2. bring battleships
3. Use said battleships in a harsh overbearing imperialist method.

After all, if we don't do it who will? The Europeans?

**Wolfstan**

Frazzled wrote:
Wolfstan wrote:And just what happened last time your country was involved in Somali? Hmmm... hold on a mo, oh yes, "Blackhawk Down". It's cosmic karma, bandy arsed natives, wearing clashing coloured clothes and armed with RPG's are an accident waiting to happen for the US. They 'd you over when their mode of transport was a Toyota pick up, they are now in the maritime equivalent of the pick up. I have no doubt you will wipe hundreds out, but I guarantee you one of those little buggers will do a 'Deathstar' on your biggest and shiniest ship.

Thats why you don't go ashore dorkboy.

1. Don't be nice this time. Don't try to keep people from starving or generally being good guys. Do what we do best-blow stuff up.
2. bring battleships
3. Use said battleships in a harsh overbearing imperialist method.

After all, if we don't do it who will? The Europeans?

Missed the point there Fraz. They got you on the land, what makes you think you'd be any safer on the water?

**Frazzled**

Same reason you Brits always thought you were safer

To quote the refined awesome of Galvatron, 'here's a hint.'

Come on Brit, free seas have been a hallmark policy of your country for centuries. Or have you become a bunch of wussy boys?

Evidently someone did not catch I was being playful about the French moniker. My apologies.
OT but an ode to France

**Wolfstan**

Irony isn't a US strong point is it? Love the whole idea of the US approach, but there is a thing called "sod's law" that says those bandy legged buggers and more than capable of putting a spanner in the works. They get a lucky hit on a ship or screw you over by achieving some other unbelievable feat of arms. I think you will find that a nippy little boat zig-zagging about is harder to hit then you know, which is why I think small strike units will be the best approach.

Over 200 years ago we learnt a very valuable lesson on the perceived fighting effectiveness, when a group of colonial woodmen with muskets, outwitted and out fought His Majesty's army

**malfred**

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Barbary_pirates

**Frazzled**

Wolfstan respectfully,

1. The US Navy's first successful war was against pirates. We've gotten better since then. In fact, we don't lose when we're on the water.

2. You don't get a "lucky hit" on a battleship

If you're afraid of pirates, who are you NOT afraid of?

**yani**

Yep America could go in all guns blazing but just think what that would do to its already shoddy worldwide reputation.
What I think would be better is to use convoys of merchant vessels with one or two warships among them

**George Spiggott**

Frazzled wrote:2. You don't get a "lucky hit" on a battleship

Hood, Bismark and Maine aside eh?

Is this guy still (just) the cook?

Johnny Depp doesn't stand a fething chance. All the running like a nancy boy and eyeliner in the world won't save them.

**Frazzled**

Hood was shot by a battleship so nope (besides that a British ship)

Bismarck took a pounding for hours by most of the Royal Navy.

Maine's magazine blew up in port.

**reds8n**

Pfft pack of lies.

Like Mrs Frazled would let Mr. Frazzled spend $50. Comedy gold.

**Frazzled**

yani wrote:Yep America could go in all guns blazing but just think what that would do to its already shoddy worldwide reputation.
What I think would be better is to use convoys of merchant vessels with one or two warships among them

This explains why Europe does nothing, well, ever. How in the world did you guys survive Hitler? Oh yea-the Russians.

EDIT: Thats also why dragging out an old carrier would be perfect. They were excellent escort ships in WWII. Armed with slow moving scout aircraft they are ideal for shooting up small boats.

Like Mrs Frazled would let Mr. Frazzled spend $50. Comedy gold.

True that.

**Ironhide**

Feh! A battleship. I'd rather have one of these.

Tomahawk cruise missiles FTW!

**Frazzled**

Nah, just surface under the pirate boat. Voila instant pirate capture.

Of course we could go old school and issue letters of Marque. Every pirate you kill or capture you get US$500.

**Wolfstan**

One spanner duly dropped: http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worldnews/piracy/5132627/Somali-pirates-defy-US-navy-by-holding-American-captain-hostage.html

Why do I bother!?! The idea of getting revenge on this little bastich's is wholly supported by me, a point you appear to be missing for some strange reason. I would suggest that you read Colonal Von Luck's autobiography and perhaps any other book by a German soldier who served in Normandy. You will see that although a bloody terrifying experience, alot of soldiers survived. Battleships have awesome firepower, but their main guns aren't cruise missiles. Which again goes back to my point that those boats are fast and small. They will also learn to hide from you by using other ships as cover, either as physical cover or mixing in with innocent crew men on other boats.

Yes my point about the RPG's is over the top, it was meant to be, it was highlighting 'sod's law'. My opinion still stands, take them out up close and personnal (not helo's, remember they come armed with RPG's as standard and helo's are allegic to them things). No prisoners, if not shot in a firefight, they get a bullet in the back of the head. You don't have to be right wing to support ruthless actions.

**utan**

I blame this all on Disney glamorizing the pirate culture.

**Frazzled**

The irony of coming from a navy/marine family and this thread is that being in the ocean scares me to death unless the water is Maui clear. Give me an underwater chainsaw and I don't care. But if I can see whats around me and am bereft of the arsenal, dude no way.