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No I don't write these. I'm sadly not that clever.



Livestock: tom i'd like our conversations to be set in an alternate reality where, in the 1970s, an apocalypse destroyed most of america and gave rise to a new age of wizards, super science, and fierce gladiator battles.
Moof: josh i will be a wizard
Livestock: tom i will be a super-scientist
Moof: very well
Livestock: tom as a super-scientist i find your silly rituals and incantations to be laughable
Moof: josh i turn you into a hog
Livestock: feth

Polymorph FTW