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2009/08/31 06:23:37
Subject: Another gem from my inbox:
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Incorporating Wet-Blending
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Subject: THE LOGIC OF THE US STIUMULUS PACKAGE
>
> THE LOGIC OF THE US STIUMULUS PACKAGE ESCAPES ME
>
> Q. What is an Economic Stimulus payment?
>
> A.
> It is money that the federal government will send to
> taxpayers.
>
> Q. Where will the government get this money?
> A. From taxpayers.
>
> Q. So the government is giving me back my own money?
> A. Only a smidgen.
>
> Q. What is the purpose of this payment?
> A. The plan is for
> you to use the money to purchase a
> high-definition TV set,
> thus
> stimulating the economy.
> Q. But isn't that stimulating the economy of
> China ?
> A. Shut up.
>
> Below is some
> helpful advice on how to best help the US economy by
> spending your stimulus check wisely:
>
> If you spend the stimulus money at Wal-Mart, the money will
> go to China .
> If you spend it on gasoline, your money will go to the
> Arabs.
> If you purchase a computer, it will go to India.
> If you purchase fruit and vegetables, it will go to
> Mexico, Honduras
> and Guatemala .
> If you buy a car, it will go to Japan or Korea.
> If you purchase useless stuff, it will go to Taiwan .
> If you pay your credit cards off, or buy stock, it will go
> to
> management bonuses and they will hide it offshore.
> Instead, keep the money in America by:
> 1 spending it at yard sales,
> or
> 2 going to ball games, or
> 3 spending it on prostitutes,
> or
> 4 beer or
> 5 tattoos.
>
> ( These are the
> only American businesses still operating in the US .)
> Conclusion:
>
> Go to a ball game with a tattooed prostitute that you met
> at a yard
> sale and drink beer all day.
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Mannahnin wrote:A lot of folks online (and in emails in other parts of life) use pretty mangled English. The idea is that it takes extra effort and time to write properly, and they’d rather save the time. If you can still be understood, what’s the harm? While most of the time a sloppy post CAN be understood, the use of proper grammar, punctuation, and spelling is generally seen as respectable and desirable on most forums. It demonstrates an effort made to be understood, and to make your post an easy and pleasant read. By making this effort, you can often elicit more positive responses from the community, and instantly mark yourself as someone worth talking to.
insaniak wrote: Every time someone threatens violence over the internet as a result of someone's hypothetical actions at the gaming table, the earth shakes infinitisemally in its orbit as millions of eyeballs behind millions of monitors all roll simultaneously.
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2009/08/31 06:28:45
Subject: Another gem from my inbox:
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Da Head Honcho Boss Grot
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According to the weed thread, that would be another safe bet.
(Or meth, if you're feelin' lucky.)
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Anuvver fing - when they do sumfing, they try to make it look like somfink else to confuse everybody. When one of them wants to lord it over the uvvers, 'e says "I'm very speshul so'z you gotta worship me", or "I know summink wot you lot don't know, so yer better lissen good". Da funny fing is, arf of 'em believe it and da over arf don't, so 'e 'as to hit 'em all anyway or run fer it.
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2009/08/31 08:04:29
Subject: Re:Another gem from my inbox:
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The Dread Evil Lord Varlak
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Wow, welcome to December 08. Seriously, that email is really old. And pretty lame... I mean I know people are going to say 'but it was just trying to be funny' but doesn't humour come from truth and not rubbish and half-assed myths?
First, stimulus spending doesn't come straight from taxes. It comes from expending previous surpluses or extending debt. While in the long term this will be recovered with taxes or other forms of revenue, the point is that you're spending money right now when the economy needs the boost, and taking it out later when the economy needs to be slowed.
Second, the idea that the US doesn't manufacture anything is wrong, and it wouldn't take very long to find this out if you bothered to look. The US actually manufactures more than anyone else in the world, it represents about 20% of total world manufacturing. Which is a lot.
Third, most of the stimulus wasn't in tax rebates.
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“We may observe that the government in a civilized country is much more expensive than in a barbarous one; and when we say that one government is more expensive than another, it is the same as if we said that that one country is farther advanced in improvement than another. To say that the government is expensive and the people not oppressed is to say that the people are rich.”
Adam Smith, who must have been some kind of leftie or something. |
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