How to introduce your toddler to 40k: or Grimdargarten

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**Grey Templar**

we will start off with the basics, Our ABCs

A is for Angron, Deamon primarch of the World Eaters. Traitor's all

B is for Baal, Home of the Blood angels.

C is for Chimera, transport of the IG.

D is for Dorn, Primarch of the Impierial fists, the unwavering defense.

E is for Eldar, treacherous xeno, dying race, prophets of doom.

F is for Fenris, home of the Space Wolves. Hounds of the emperor.

G is for Grot, sneaky greenskin, downtrodden, Rolling pin, slave.

H is for Hellgun, Weapon of the Stormtrooper.

I is for Isha, mother to the Eldar.

J is for Justicar, noble Grey Knight, heroes all.

K is for Kela Mensha Kain, the bloody handed god

L is for Lucius, Eternal warrior, Traitor, follower of the most perverse one.

M is for Monsterous Creature, Carnifex, Deamon prince, Talos, all are this.

N is for Nightbringer, Grim Reaper, hunger, inescapable death.

O is for Ork, greenskin, bringer of war.

P is for Pariah, Souless, void in the warp, Bane of psykers.

Q is for -Deleted by the nQuisition-

R is for Reroll, something that is invaluable in the game.

S is for S-

-This record has been deleteed by order of the

nquisition-

T is for Titan, the Warmachines of the Admech

U is for Ultramarines, Space Smurfs, Space Scouts, rules lawers all.

V is for Vindicare, behave or the boogy man will get you.

W is for Warhammer, a different game.

X is for Xenos, Alien, abhored and feared.

Y is for Yarrick, Commisar renowned.

Z is for Zzapp gun, Grot Weapon.

other preschool 40k items needed.

GO.

**Devastator**

angron is primarch of the WOLD EATERS
not word bearers

**Exarch_Nektel**

remember kids, memorize your ABCs so you don't end up in the EOT

**Soladrin**

L is for lorgar, not lucius,

Lorgar is primarch of the World Bearers

**Exarch_Nektel**

Soladrin wrote:L is for lorgar, not lucius,

Lorgar is primarch of the Word Bearers

fixed

**Space_Potato**

I totally agree on the Q is for question mark

S_P

**Crimson Cobra**

Since you have nothing for Q, you should make that one the file deleted by the Inquisition.
I'm sure you can do something better for S.

**gothgar**

World Word Bearing Eaters

**Karosok**

Spelled Yarrick wrong.

**Grey Templar**

Fixed Spelling mistakes.

**Soladrin**

World Bearers... I'm awesome... a legion made Atlas clones..

Word Eaters sounds silly though. XD Books! om nom nom

**Grey Templar**

Knowledge is power, brain food.

om nom indeed.

**AlmightyWalrus**

Grey Templar wrote:B is for Baal, Home of the Blood angels.

The galactical association of Black Templars would like to have a word with you, sir.

**Exarch_Nektel**

Soladrin wrote:World Bearers... I'm awesome... a legion made Atlas clones..

Word Eaters sounds silly though. XD Books! om nom nom

I can just imagine a legion of space marines charging into battle holding planets on their shoulders.

**Grey Templar**

AlmightyWalrus wrote:
Grey Templar wrote:B is for Baal, Home of the Blood angels.

The galactical association of Black Templars would like to have a word with you, sir.

under the authority of the Ordo Bigotus-subordo of the Impierial Inquisition-your request is denied

**The Imperator**

T is for Tau

**CrashUSAR**

S is for Squishy, like the Imperial Guard?

**Little lord Fauntleroy**

D is for Dakka. You can never have enough.

**Grey Templar**

OK kids, its ryme time

The Eldar sat on a wall(sing to the tune of Humpty Dumpty)

Eldar, the Eldar, sat on a wall.

Eldar, the Eldar had a great fall.

all the Asurmen Craftworlds and all the fallen Asurmen.

Couldn't put the Eldar together again.

You Better not Shout

You better not shout, you better not cry, you better not sin, I'm telling you why.

the Inquisitor is coming...

the Inquisitor is coming, is coming to town.

he knows when you are sleeping, he knows when your awake

he knows when you've been Bad or good, so be good for goodness sake.

sooooo..

You better not shout, you better not cry, you better not sin, I'm telling you why.

the Inquisitor is coming...

the Inquisitor is coming, is coming to town.

more to come....

**The Power Cosmic**

I want to see a more Uplifting Primer style alphabet, full of Imperial propaganda.

**MekanobSamael**

H is for Horus, king of all traitors. Eat your vegetables or he'll get you.

**wuestenfux**

Crimson Cobra wrote:Since you have nothing for Q, you should make that one the file deleted by the Inquisition.
I'm sure you can do something better for S.

Q could stand for quickening.

**mrwhoop**

S is for Salamanders?

**Grey Templar**

no, no, no.

S is for a certain race that may not be mentioned.

S

Q

U

A

T

S

**Space_Potato**

A is for Astartes! Far stronger than the pen.
B is for Battle, an easy win for men.
C is for Chimera, steed of all mankind.
D is for Dark Eldar, Xenos that try to hide.
E is for Emperor, our holy, guiding light.
F is for Falcon in which scum, take flight.
G is for Guardsmen, the backbone of our race.
H is for Heretic, just punch them in the face.
I is for Inquisitor, bring the enemies fall.
J is for Justicar, noble Grey Knight, heroes all.
K is for Krak, the missile for killing armour.
L is for Lasgun, this gun will surely harm 'em.
M is for Mortar, strike them from afar.
N is for 'Nids, not scary at all by far.
O is for Ork, brutish, weak and slow.
P is for Plasma, for melting through the foe.
Q is for Questions, those loyal do not ask.
R is for Sandbags, man's defense of choice.
S is for Space Marines, the Emperor's loyal voice.
T is for Titan, Mechanicus' Armoured Fist.
U is for Ultramarine, 1st company are dearly missed.
V is for Vindicare, when you need to make them learn (to keep their heads down).
X is for Xenos, purge and maim and burn.
Y is for Yarrick, Ork Slayer Reknowned.
Z is for Zzap gun, was probably pre-owned.

It rhymes (more or less), and sounds kinda like something from the Uplifting Primer - Children's Edition

S_P

**PukeNut**

The ork says

WWWWWWWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1

Edit:
@space potato

you forgot W

W is for Waagh!

**Mad Rabbit**

There once was a man named Mat Ward
Of all codex-writers was lord
He writes like a tyke
Land raiders Deep Strike?
Please go back to the drawing board.

**metallifan**

Daemon Prince*

Traitors all*

Imperial Fists*

Kaela Mensha Kain*

Soulless*

rules lawyers*

abhorred*

Commissar*

Fixed some spelling errors for ya. Copy + Paste if you'd like

**T_VanderZwaag**

This thread not only introduces children to 40k, but also grammar and spelling.

**Crimson Cobra**

Space_Potato wrote:
R is for Sandbags, man's defense of choice.

Lol, something seems a little off with this line...