The following is a a repost of a message I sent to a friend on facebook. I typed the whole thing out, realized I had pretty much written a whole review, and decided to post it here. It so terrible, , it doesn't even deserve the time it would take to reformat the review to a more public format.
Dude, stay away from Alhpa Protocol. Don't buy it, trust me. Worst game I've played in years. The AI is slowed, the combat system is the biggest piece of gak ever, story and characters are shallow and uninteresting. The character customization is decent, but the weapon custommization is so bass ackwards and unrealistic it makes me nerd rage to the nth degree. Beyond that, the game is very litte "Spy" and very much "Every other third person action game ever, but worse." You can do things like cultivate informants, and gather intel, but these are handled poorly. Intel you pretty much just buy from a computer menu, and whenever you want to go find an informant, the mission iis just a cutscene of you uncerimoniously tromping up to the poor sap and smashing his head into the bar or something of the sort. very little challenge involved, and certaintly nowhere near the level of thought or consideration is involved as you'd expect there to be in spywork. Did I mention the weapon and gear customization makes me want to punch a baby through a flaming wall of kittens? The level of realism is nonexistant, weapon stats are pretty much on explained and upgrades do totally illogical things to your guns. Armor customiztion isn't quite as bad, but most of the suits sceam "Sci-Fi super soldier", not modern day operative/spy. You can choose to take street clothes, but the stats are so laughably inadaquete that you'd have to be a moron to consider using that outfit. The AI, like I said, makes the intelligence of a braindead goldfish enviable. They enemy has two strategies which they eagerly employ. The first is to stand about shooting aimlessly in your general direction. The second is to make a suicidal bullrush at you, with the vain hope of punching you in the dick or something before you unload a full assault rifle clip in their Playstation 2 graphpic levle faces, or attempt to counter melee them, which consists of doing nothing more than mashing B until the bad man goes away. Tactics aside, the AI could use a little detection consistency. At times, you can simply walk right on by, and they will act like aforre mention domesticated species of fish. Other times, they will all develop X-Ray vision, and Neo like reflexes, spring into action without moment's notice or warning. I could go on about the inconsistent cover system, the confusing, useless special abilities, the heavily outdated graphics, D rate sound track, cliched thriller story or the myriad of other problems, but I won;t. trust your old friend, and at best, wait until this game inevitably ends up in the bargain bin.
I was hoping for Michael Westen: The Game, but got Inspector Clouseau: The clusterfeth