Come, sons and daughters of the Empire!
Our day of glory is here!
Against us the - where's everyone gone? What's that in the sky? It looks like a giant flying turd. Uh-oh, it's coming this way like something from a Michael Bay film. Is that a mycetic spore? I thought what's-his-face had written them out to make more people buy Space Marines instead. Uh-oh, it's landed. HOLY CLOVES OF GARLIC, WHAT'S THAT BIG THING COMING OUT OF THE SPORE? LEG IT! LEG IT!
Will our craven protagonist survive? Find out in part 2: "Er, Britain, you know we're always telling the rest of the world that you're lazy drunken idiots? Can we put that to one side for a few years?"
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