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Types of WH40k Forum lurker that no one likes:

1. The Economics Professor:

This guy thinks he knows everything about how a model business should be run. He is frequently railing on GW for poor financial moves. He also is certain he has very accurate knowledge of the costs of production, design, and distribution.

Last time I checked, they are the ones selling products that you are sitting at your computer buying. Not the other way around. This brings us to our next lurker.

2. The Guy Who Is Always Mad at GW For Ridiculous Reasons, But Still Blows His Entire Paycheck On GW Stock.

Pretty self-explanatory really.

3. The Space Marine Fan Boy:

This is the kid who has played for two weeks against his brothers ratty ass army and thinks space marines are awesome. They are much rarer than the next type of lurker, but equally annoying.

4. The Anti Space Marine Fan Boy:

This is the guy who rips on the Space Marine Fan Boy by using mocking language and writing things like "Spess Mehrine". If you have ever purposely misspelled Space Marine with the intention to mock, this is you. These are the same guys who piss and moan about new space marine chapter codex rumors. No one cares that you think GW takes care of space marines too much. Shut up.

5. The Rock Paper Scissor Retorter:

These people will reply to posts involving someones unit with the obvious counter oblivious to the fact that A. Points values were never mentioned, B. No one ever uses your obvious counter unit because this is the only thing it does and C. Obvious counter is obvious. Example:

Excited-Poster-Who-Just-Won-A-Game: "My Killa Kans got into CC and ran over 3 units!"
The-Rock-Paper-Scissor-Retorter: "Newb. Thats why I always take a unit of Penitent engines!"

Your engines suck. And one of them costs as much as 2.5 kans.

6. The New Codex Chicken Little:

This is the guy who proclaims that the latest codex will destabilize the world economy causing warp rifts in time-space. Look man, you haven't even seen the points costs of the unit. Titans seem pretty overpowered until you realize that they cost the same points as an entire army.

7. The Summerhill Math Student:

This is the guy who always notes that mathhammer is useless because real games don't happen in such a controlled environment. Well no gak. That's why its called Mathhammer, not Warhammer. Oh, and also you are wrong. Ask the top players if mathhammer is useless or not.

8. The Power Gaming Ostrich:

This is further divided into two subtypes which are not mutually exclusive. Type A: This guy claims to play really fluffy "Themed" armies, but they just happen to be a rationalizing being a win-at-all-costs gamer. These guys will often give voice to such claims as "I take two units of Nob Bikers because they are speed freeks" and "I play Space Wolves" Type B: These guys insist that there is no such thing as overpowered units. There are. We all know which units they are. If you add a list to one of your units instead of the other way around, chances are good that that's an over powered unit.

It is important to note that there is a distinction between this lurker and just a power gamer. Power Gamer Ostriches are trouble because they are either in denial, or flat out lying.

9: Merriam-Webster Rule Lawyer:

Discussing rules is fine. When you bring out the dictionary to post the definition of "May" or "Any", do us a favor and log out.

10: My Appendix Has Burst:

You picked an army from the appendix of your 3rd ed army book. You bought 13th Company, Last Chancers, Iron Warriors Basilisks, LatD, Tanith, whatever. Read the first sentence of this paragraph again. Stop complaining, and start "counts as"ing.


Can you guys think of any others?

The obssessive poster-
This is the guy/gal who, no matter what the subject is, will always comment, even if he/she has no clue what everyone's on about, e.g: normal poster- "I love those empire steam tanks" Obssessive poster- "well tyranids will destroy you"
Normal poster- "...what?!"

The flamer-
This is the guy/gal who will always find a way to annoy people and start a flame war, e.g: normal poster- "I think plasma weapons are OP"
Flamer- "you just think that because you're a moronic noob"
normal poster- "I've been doing this longer than you, so..."
flamer- "SHUT THE FETH UP YOU NOOB"
normal poster- "As i said, if anyone's the noob, it's you..."
flamer- "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOB"
admin- "this topic has been blocked due to a flame war"

11: Back in my days

The author consistently makes references to past editions (3rd or earlier required), even when not needed

The bandwagon hopper: every time a new codex is released they decide to pick up that army and play its it till another codex is released then dumps there models to get more.

Ask the top players if mathhammer is useless or not.

... actually many of them will say this. Mathhammer by itself IS useless. Mathhammer is only useful in context. There is rarely a full context to mathhammer in forum posts.


A far more annoying type of forum poster are those who only lurk long enough to insult others based off of small snippets how they supposedly post. See: This thread.

Melissia wrote:A far more annoying type of forum poster are those who only lurk long enough to insult others based off of small snippets how they supposedly post. See: This thread.

Amen, sister.

A far more annoying type of forum poster are those who only lurk long enough to insult others based off of small snippets how they supposedly post. See: This thread.

I think it's meant to be a joke...at least I hope....

cyrax777 wrote:The bandwagon hopper: every time a new codex is released they decide to pick up that army and play its it till another codex is released then dumps there models to get more.

What's wrong with this? Personally, I've stuck with one army my entire play career, but that's more because of laziness than anything.

I have no problem when people see a ton of new models and wanting to own them.

I don't think there's anything wrong with it.

If you like the models and army and you have the disposable income, go for it. Bandwagon or not, play the armies YOU enjoy playing.

12 (?): The space marine player who are firmly convinced that space marines are a reflection of their US almost namesakes both in spirit and physical accomplishments (or they should be), and never lose an opportunity to suggest it . They take great offense if someone dare to undermine their point of view.

They´re not annoying but just amusing to read.

The "my input is needed" poster - This poster constantly feels the need to comment on an interesting conversation/thread and fails to read the entire thread and generally prefaces their post(s) with "I have not read the entire thread so this might already be posted." Commonly their input is of little value or has already been covered in the four pages prior to their post. Much like the obsessive poster but not to be confused with as the obsessive poster generally is obsessed enough to read the thread in its entirety before adding their appropriate drivel.

The grammar Nazi - The poster that looks for any misspelled word to give them an edge in a thread. As if someone quickly responding warrants such veracious attack on their grammar or sentence structure to completely eliminate the general validity of their post(s.) Generally this poster does not provide a counter point relevant to the conversation and instead continues to dismiss others instead of adding any relevance to the conversation.

I thought lurkers were people who didn't post.

#12: Gwar!

Gwar! wrote:#12: Gwar!

He wasn't so bad back when you got to look at that funny shark in every thread. I mean, it's a shark in a top hat!

Now, though, that creepy mask like thing... <shudder>

Gwar! wrote:#12: Gwar!

Scrabb wrote:I thought lurkers were people who didn't post.

Especially not (what is quickly closing in on) 20k posts.



#13: Ones who stay lurkers and never post!

The "my input is needed" poster - This poster constantly feels the need to comment on an interesting conversation/thread and fails to read the entire thread and generally prefaces their post(s) with "I have not read the entire thread so this might already be posted."

Hands up
It is a matter of courtesy to posters to acknowledge they may have already made the comment and I am not simply being disrespectful.
I cannot always read through pages of text in a single sitting.
Sorry if that offends.

I don't see it that my input is so valuable but may wish to contribute or ask a question. Isn't that the whole purpose of forums?

No. The point of forums is to flame the other guy into submission.

This thread should be in the off-topic forum as it adds nothing to 40k General Discussion.

kronk wrote:No. The point of forums is to flame the other guy into submission.

This thread should be in the off-topic forum as it adds nothing to 40k General Discussion.

Nuh uh! YOU should be in the off-topic forum as you add nothing to the discussion!

We need a Firefighter Orkimoticon to douse the flames of provocation.

The definition of lurker is someone who reads and never posts.

As such there is no way to define or classify lurkers as we have no knowledge of them.