Forum adverts like this one are shown to any user who is not logged in. Join us by filling out a tiny 3 field form and you will get your own, free, dakka user account which gives a good range of benefits to you: No adverts like this in the forums anymore. Times and dates in your local timezone. Full tracking of what you have read so you can skip to your first unread post, easily see what has changed since you last logged in, and easily see what is new at a glance. Email notifications for threads you want to watch closely. Being a part of the oldest wargaming community on the net. If you are already a member then feel free to login now.

Name: The Expendables
Founding Chapter: The Fire Hawks
Home world: Ormagron (Destroyed) They exist on three battleship. One for each company.
Chapter Master: Sevastian the Scythe of the Emperor
Founding: Unknown. There are no existing records detailing the creation of the chapter.
Current Strength:250
Current Deployment: Acting as synapse creature kill teams against major splinter fleets.
Battle Cry: Redemption!
Speciality: Hit and run attacks conducted behind enemy lines. (Usually targeted at enemy commanders)
Colour Scheme: Purple, Green, Silver
Unique Features: They are the chapter with the most recorded appearances of the legion of the damned. The legion seem drawn to those who share their gene seed.
Background
The chapter disobeyed orders from the inquisition (who’s command they had been placed under) and as a punishment they were (and still are) being sent on the most suicidal missions. Their name was changed from the ‘Fire Claw’ to `The Expendables’. They were restricted to replenishing the numbers of their chapter up to 250 and they were not allowed to defend their home planet from tyranid invasion. The only way they will ever be allowed to have a home, a full sized chapter and independence like other chapters is if they successfully complete 1000 deployments. They are currently on their 67th deployment (to the surprise of the Inquisition who thought they would fall long before now). And their is talk of turning into a kind of penal legion for space marines where a marine who commits a crime that wouldn’t normally mean death is sent to The expendables to serve out his sentence.











Chapter Organisation:

First Company

Second Company

Third Company

First Company
Commander
Chapter Master Sevastian (Wolf Lord, Chapter Master)
Bodyguard
Tomahawk (5 Man) (Terminator Assault Squad)
Veteran Teams
Broadsword (5 Man) (Terminator Assault Squad)
Rapier (5 Man) (Tactical Terminator Squad)
Longsword (5 Man) (Tactical Terminator Squad)
Warhammer (5 Man) (Tactical Squad/ Wolf guard/ Sword Brethren/ Veterans/ Sternguard/ Vanguard)
Longbow (5 Man) (Tactical Squad/ Wolf guard/ Sword Brethren/ Veterans/ Sternguard/ Vanguard)
Halberd (5 Man) (Tactical Squad/ Wolf guard/ Sword Brethren/ Veterans/ Sternguard/ Vanguard)
Lance (5 Man) (Tactical Squad/ Wolf guard/ Sword Brethren/ Veterans/ Sternguard/ Vanguard)
Halberd (5 Man) (Tactical Squad/ Wolf guard/ Sword Brethren/ Veterans/ Sternguard/ Vanguard)

Scythe (5 Man) (Devestators)









Second Company
Commander
Captain Karolek (Bike Captain/ Sammael)
Bike Squads
Gold (6 Man)
Re-forger (6 Man)
Banner (6 Man)
Neptune (6 Man)
Hurricane (6 Man)
Attack Bikes
Fortune (2 Man)
Master (2 Man)
Mongoose (2 Man)
Power (2 Man)
Fury (2 Man)
Overload (2 Man)
Land Speeders
Land Speeder Tornado ‘Azul’ (2 Man Crew)
Land Speeder Tornado `Bison’ (2 Man Crew)
Land Speeder Tornado `Dingo’ (2 Man Crew)
Assualt Squads
Courageous (Vanguard) (5 Man)




Third Company
Commander
Captain Maxim (Emperors Champion/ Captain/ Wolf Lord)
Tactical Squads
Dragon (10 Man)
Impassable (10 Man)
Nightmare (10 Man)
Hydra (10 Man)
Unbreakable (10 Man)
Bulletproof (10 Man)
Devastator Squads
Firestorm (5 Man)
Thunderstorm (5 Man)
Barrage (5 Man)
Overkill (5 Man)
Assault Squads
Cloud Breaker (10 Man)
Earthquake (10 Man)
Scout Squads
Drake (10 Man)
Burrow (5 Man)
Success (5 Man)
Acid (5 Man)
Gambit (5 Man)
Land Speeders
Land Speeder Storm `Rush’ (2 Man Crew)
Land Speeder Storm `Flash’ (2 Man Crew)
Land Speeder Storm `Light’ (2 Man Crew)
Rhinos
Ajax (2 Man Crew)
Khan (2 Man Crew)
Mantis (2 Man Crew)
Anvil (2 Man Crew)

I plan to build second and third company's first and use second as a Dark Angels and vanilla marines force and third as a blood angels/ space wolf/ vanilla marines/ Black templars force. And first company as a space wolf/ vanilla marines/ black templars force. The black Templar force will almost always be a cross between third and first companys. First will also be used as deathwing.

I currently have the models to make one third of second company and one third of third company and Sevastion and Tomohawk.

O.o. Interesting.

a little odd, but decent.

FWIW: the inquisition can't order a SM chapter to do anything(well, they CAN, but marines are under no obligation to do so)

unless a Chapter can be proved of blatent Heresy and they get the GKs to conduct a purge there really isn't any way for the Inquisition to do anything to a disobiediant chapter.


i reccomend that you have the chapter being on a crusade of vengence for the destruction their homeworld by a hive fleet. the low numbers explained by losses and poor access to recruits.

ChocolateGork wrote:Founding Chapter: The Fire Hawks

The Fire Hawks are a "Cursed Founding" Chapter, why would the Imperium use their gene-seed over a chapter with a less dubious past? There isn't even a clear record of which Chapter the Fire Hawks' gene-seed came from.

ChocolateGork wrote:Home world: Ormagron (Destroyed) They exist on three battleship. One for each company.

"Battleship" is a fairly general term. Do you mean that they have 3 Battlebarges? If so, that's astounding. A single Battlebarge can carry and simultaneously deploy three companies; most full strength Chapters only have 2 or 3 Battlebarges in their fleet, even the Blood Angels only have 2. I'd suggest changing that to Strike Cruisers, which generally carry a single company (inc. support vehicles) and are both significantly smaller and more common.

ChocolateGork wrote:The chapter disobeyed orders from the inquisition (who’s command they had been placed under)[...]

What orders did they disobey? Why were they under the command of the Inquisition? How did the Inquisition gain complete command over a Space Marine Chapter?

ChocolateGork wrote:Their name was changed from the ‘Fire Claw’ to `The Expendables’.

The Relictors already held the name "the Fire Claws" until they changed it circa 950M41.

ChocolateGork wrote:They were restricted to replenishing the numbers of their chapter up to 250 and they were not allowed to defend their home planet from tyranid invasion.

How did the Inquisition have such power over the Chapter to overturn the tenets of the Codex Astartes? And why was the homeworld not simply fobbed off on another Chapter, like those of the Mantis Warriors and Executioners in the wake of the Badab War?

ChocolateGork wrote:And their is talk of turning into a kind of penal legion for space marines where a marine who commits a crime that wouldn’t normally mean death is sent to The expendables to serve out his sentence.

There are very few crimes that wouldn't warrant death, but would be worth sending a single marine perhaps halfway across the galaxy to serve in a penal force. And I would have thoughts that the Astartes would want to keep any failings within the Chapter, partly to save face amongst their fellows, partly to avoid the undue attention of the Inquisition.

ChocolateGork wrote:Chapter Organisation:

Is this really necessary? Do we really need to know how many men are in each squad, and what the squad designations are? You also appear to have missed out any apothecaries, techmarines, librarians and dreadnoughts. Do they simply not have any of these? What happened to them? And if there are no Apothecaries/Techmarines, how to they treat injured Astartes/repair equipment?

You've got an interesting idea, but it needs some work.

This sounds harsh, but quite frankly they need a better name. The Expendables is the name of a movie if i remember correctly. Try something like

Knights of Sacrifice
Emperors Forsaken
Emperors Sacrifice

Etc etc, The Expendables is terrible. Sorry.

Also just a final note with your squad names, Try some of those names in Latin.
For example Squad Broadsword could be changed to Squad Gladius, and thats just off the top of my head.

All of this is supposed to be constructive. Sorry if this seems harsh.

1. The only chapter the inquisition has 'power' over is the GK.

2. The fire hawks would never be used as a parent chapter, the mechanicus doesn't use the geneseed of space wolves, a first founding legion, because of flaws, so using a member of the cursed founding as a sourse of geneseed is frankly rediculous.

3.It is only the high lords of terra (as the voice of the emperor)
that can put punishment on a chapter, bar the chapter itself.

4.The function of this chapter is already covered by the ordo xeno deathwatch kill teams, who are much better equiped and trained in this opperation.

5. the name is terrible

6. squad names are rubbish ''mongoose'' really?

7. chapters deal with their problems 'in house' they don't send their in trouble marines to a penal legion.



The ideaof a crusading chapter, striken by battle losses, hunting splinters from a hive fleet after the death of their home world is a good idea though

Blunt, im pretty sure this is his first time trying to make a chapter so try to be constructive please.

@ OP
like i have said, when naming squads try to conjoin latin words. Read some space marine fluff, read the Heresy, nick some squad names from there if you need to and they dont play to big a part in the novels!

Just make a chapter that you enjoy, but try to think of the name, maybe even look up an online thesaurus so you could put in expendable and get sacrificial. it fits much better with the grimdark.

Tekeino wrote:Blunt, im pretty sure this is his first time trying to make a chapter so try to be constructive please.

@ OP
like i have said, when naming squads try to conjoin latin words. Read some space marine fluff, read the Heresy, nick some squad names from there if you need to and they dont play to big a part in the novels!

Just make a chapter that you enjoy, but try to think of the name, maybe even look up an online thesaurus so you could put in expendable and get sacrificial. it fits much better with the grimdark.

actually this is his 3rd thread on similer subjects

Tekeino wrote:Blunt, im pretty sure this is his first time trying to make a chapter so try to be constructive please.

@ OP
like i have said, when naming squads try to conjoin latin words. Read some space marine fluff, read the Heresy, nick some squad names from there if you need to and they dont play to big a part in the novels!

Just make a chapter that you enjoy, but try to think of the name, maybe even look up an online thesaurus so you could put in expendable and get sacrificial. it fits much better with the grimdark.

when you get past 100 posts you lose the kids glove approach newbies get, and nothing i said was harsh as most of it was point of fact, apart from the name thing, but lets face it naming a chapter 'the expendables' (even in an ironic, this army took a 1000 years and what would be billions of pounds and 1000s of human lives to make way) is a bad name for a space marines chapter, for an imperial guard veteran penal squad (like the last chancers) its a great name, in the whole classic ww2 filmic image imperial guard armys can have.

BluntmanDC wrote:

Tekeino wrote:Blunt, im pretty sure this is his first time trying to make a chapter so try to be constructive please.

@ OP
like i have said, when naming squads try to conjoin latin words. Read some space marine fluff, read the Heresy, nick some squad names from there if you need to and they dont play to big a part in the novels!

Just make a chapter that you enjoy, but try to think of the name, maybe even look up an online thesaurus so you could put in expendable and get sacrificial. it fits much better with the grimdark.

when you get past 100 posts you lose the kids glove approach newbies get, and nothing i said was harsh as most of it was point of fact

I think he means you could be a little less critical and a bit more constructive. Maybe give advice and some ideas.

purplefood wrote:

BluntmanDC wrote:

Tekeino wrote:Blunt, im pretty sure this is his first time trying to make a chapter so try to be constructive please.

@ OP
like i have said, when naming squads try to conjoin latin words. Read some space marine fluff, read the Heresy, nick some squad names from there if you need to and they dont play to big a part in the novels!

Just make a chapter that you enjoy, but try to think of the name, maybe even look up an online thesaurus so you could put in expendable and get sacrificial. it fits much better with the grimdark.

when you get past 100 posts you lose the kids glove approach newbies get, and nothing i said was harsh as most of it was point of fact

I think he means you could be a little less critical and a bit more constructive. Maybe give advice and some ideas.

Whats more constructive than telling him things that are completely unfluff in a fluff section?

BluntmanDC wrote:

purplefood wrote:

BluntmanDC wrote:

Tekeino wrote:Blunt, im pretty sure this is his first time trying to make a chapter so try to be constructive please.

@ OP
like i have said, when naming squads try to conjoin latin words. Read some space marine fluff, read the Heresy, nick some squad names from there if you need to and they dont play to big a part in the novels!

Just make a chapter that you enjoy, but try to think of the name, maybe even look up an online thesaurus so you could put in expendable and get sacrificial. it fits much better with the grimdark.

when you get past 100 posts you lose the kids glove approach newbies get, and nothing i said was harsh as most of it was point of fact

I think he means you could be a little less critical and a bit more constructive. Maybe give advice and some ideas.

Whats more constructive than telling him things that are completely unfluff in a fluff section?

All you did was tell him what is wrong with it and not help him try and fix it.

ok, to fix it:

replace all the unfluff elements that don't make sence with better options

1. loose the inquisitor stuff, either have the emperor (through the high lords of terra) sending them on a crusade or the chapter itself sending it on one

2. use a non cursed chapter as the founder (or just don't have one as they don't need to be mentioned unless it effects game play)

3. replace the bad name choice with something either wrathful (towards the tyranid) or forgiveness (towards the emperor) like retribution or benidiction.

4 remove the penal element as it is unfluff

and from my original responce :

Bluntmandc wrote: The ideaof a crusading chapter, striken by battle losses, hunting splinters from a hive fleet after the death of their home world is a good idea though

I think my original post was constructive, i'd rather have someone tell me the areas of background that are wrong then go back to the drawing board and iron them out.

Yeah but it's always good to offer alternatives especially since they obviously have come to you (and others) for help.
Also those are good imporvments for the OP.

Yep I agree.

i will try to remember that

Thank you for your original feedback
Anything on the new changes would be great.

Name: Ghosts of Ormagron (Changed from the Hounds Of Orgmagron)
Home world: Ormagron (Destroyed) They exist on three Strike Cruisers. One for each company.
Chapter Master: Sevastian falx
Current Strength:250
Current Deployment: Assisting a lone adeptus titanicus ship reach safety. After is fleet was destroyed in an ambush by Ork kill kroozers.
Battle Cry: Redemption!
Speciality: Each Company is proficient in different areas.
First Company-Devastating Thunder-Hawk deployed assaults
Second Company-The second company usually uses identical tactics in nearly every battle. They have the smallest cruiser by far but it is the only designed for operation inside atmosphere. They have their cruiser perform a single devastating attack run and they then deploy through use of thunder hawks onto the battlefield. This allows them to plant their entire company deep behind enemy lines in the thick of a battle.
Third Company-Fire Support of first and second company's and Fortification of important objectives.
Colour Scheme: Purple, Green, Silver

Chapter Organisation:
First Company
Chapter Master Sevastian (Wolf Lord, Chapter Master)
1xBodyguard Team
9xVeteran Teams(Tactical Squad/ Wolf guard/ Sword Brethren/ Veterans/ Sternguard/ Vanguard/Tactical Terminator Squad/Terminator Assault Squad)

Second Company
Captain Karolek (Bike Captain/ Sammael)
5xBike Squads
3xLand Speeders
1xAssualt Squads

Third Company
Captain Maxim (Emperors Champion/ Captain/ Wolf Lord)
6xTactical Squads
4xDevastator Squads
2xAssault Squads
6xScout Squads
3xLand Speeders
4xRhinos

Background-After failing to defend their home planet from a major tyranid splinter due to internal corruption they plotted a huge circular course through the galaxy swearing to themselves they would not forgive themselves or allow their chapter to grow beyond its current number until they had come full circle back to their destroyed home-world. They will face all threats they find on the way and aid any imperial planet they find. Only the chapter master and head astronomican of strike cruiser 1 have access to the knowledge of how far along their path they are.

I decided to name the squads as i build them so i have longer to come up with better names and as to not present you with a huge wall of text.
And just a question or two.
Could the inquisition be given control of one or more space marine chapter to aid them in an important mission if the high lords ordered it?
Could they of been created from the same gene seed of the legion if they were made before the founding was named cursed and the legion were lost to the warp?

http://wh40k.lexicanum.com/wiki/Twenty_First_Founding

If it was an unlisted chapter of that founding it would be likely that they would also have bad luck or geneseed flaws, but not the same as the fire hawks, as it wasn't just one chapter's geneseed used in the founding.


If the high lords did commence an order like this they wouldn't give the control to the inquisitor, the space marines would be there to assist not be bossed around. (space marines only take orders from two people, the emperor or another more experienced space marine)


There are examples of chapters that have ties to the inquisition and give alot of assistance to them, more so than other chapters (much like some chapters give more marines to the death watch than others).

Regarding squad names, the squads can be named after heroes of the chapter, they can be named for some attribute like fortitude, resolve, justice. They can be named for the current sergeant who leads them, they don't have to follow the whole 'Squad Vesuvius' model either. An assault squad could be called "The Locusts", a squad could be called "The Exterminators" and have their own squad heraldry showing nids being killed or just a nid head with a sword through it.
Anything really, my point is that squads and their names don't have to follow a pattern.

One way to give your chapter a style of its own is to pick a culture that you like, for example the ancient celts or the sioux indians, or Scottish Highlanders and then use names of people and places from that culture in your chapter's fluff. It helps keep things together and it makes it easier to come up with names. You can change the spellings to suit yourself and make it less obvious where the names are from too.

Squads usually bear the name of their Sergeant or a previous Sergeant of great merit.

Grey Templar wrote:Squads usually bear the name of their Sergeant or a previous Sergeant of great merit.

That is a common convention for sure, but it's not set in stone that they have to be, they can be named after anything, they can even be nameless as in just a number.

correct as well.


there really isn't a "Correct" way to do this.

The enquisition cannot order them to do anything, and even if they could a chapter would rather be declared traitoris expunges rather than let their home world be destroyed


Automatically Appended Next Post:
The enquisition cannot order them to do anything, and even if they could a chapter would rather be declared traitoris expunges rather than let their home world be destroyed


Automatically Appended Next Post:
p.s sorry accidentally wrote this twice

I will probably do ancient Greek heroes and/or gods.

What do you think about the chapter failing to defend its home-world due to 5th 6th 7th and 10th company's turning traitor?

It works, your chapter was a crusading chapter so much of the chapter spends a lot of time on campaign.
Somehow chaos gets a foothold within the chapter on their homeworld and slowly starts to corrupt the marines as they return from crusading. It makes sense that the 10th company would be one of the first to be corrupted as they would spend more time on the home world and the scouts haven't been part of the chapter for that long.
Somehow some loyalists discover the corruption and get word out to the rest of the chapter who head back.
In the meantime the splinter fleet arrives and the weakened chapter which is still trying to kill or convert the loyalists to chaos is no match for it. They lose most of their fleet and the chapter monastery (as well as the rest of the planet). All that really remains are the ships that were on crusade and maybe a few other ships that left when it was obvious that the battle against the nids could not be won.
Were any ancient artifacts rescued from the home world such as important books or weapons, tanks etc?

Other than the marines of 1st 4th and 9th company and their cruisers. Only three weapons and outfits that the captains and the chapter master currently wear. And that is becuase they were on crusade. Another reason they are so sad face.

BluntmanDC wrote:

purplefood wrote:

BluntmanDC wrote:

Tekeino wrote:Blunt, im pretty sure this is his first time trying to make a chapter so try to be constructive please.

@ OP
like i have said, when naming squads try to conjoin latin words. Read some space marine fluff, read the Heresy, nick some squad names from there if you need to and they dont play to big a part in the novels!

Just make a chapter that you enjoy, but try to think of the name, maybe even look up an online thesaurus so you could put in expendable and get sacrificial. it fits much better with the grimdark.

when you get past 100 posts you lose the kids glove approach newbies get, and nothing i said was harsh as most of it was point of fact

I think he means you could be a little less critical and a bit more constructive. Maybe give advice and some ideas.

Whats more constructive than telling him things that are completely unfluff in a fluff section?

Canon freaks get annoying. Warhammer 40,000's own canon contradicts itself several times, so why does anything slightly different from established canon just get shot down immediately?


Automatically Appended Next Post:
The only thing that I saw as odd was the inquisition ordering space marines.

and using a cursed founding isn't? the 40k background forum area is for discussing official fluff as it says in the sticky, i wasn't being a canon freak i was pointing out the flaws, there are canon contradictions but somethings are pretty set in stone.

i do like the new direction though.

The first company to turn to chaos was actually the original second company. No one actually knows how the seed of corruption was planted inside the mind of second company’s captain. Although it soon flourished and using his influence he turned the minds of the companies of 3rd then 6th then 5th then 7th and 8th companies against the emperor most likely using some kind of chaos relic. He had thought he had corrupted the captain of tenth company however captain Agrava of tenth was stronger of mind than all of those in the chapter except the master and the leaders of 3rd and 9th companies. Maintain close ties with the exorcists meant that they had no librarians to sense the forces of chaos gathering because all potential psykers were sent to the exorcists for training or death. So it was that when the chapter was making the final preparations to defend their home planet from a tyranid splinter fleet that the traitors struck. Agrava was able to send a warning to the chapter master before it happened and so damage from the attack was minimized to such a degree that the new recruits of 10th company, directed by the elite forces of the first company, bought the traitors to the cusp of an imperial victory when the tyranids hit home and both sides had to abandon the planet and the monastery where the fighting had been concentrated. The only traitor ship to make it out of the tyranid lines was the ship of second company. The last known records of 10th company are vid logs of their strike cruiser jumping into warp to chase the traitors down. Chapter Master Sevastian gathered together the last two company’s and reformed and renamed the chapter. They then set out on their crusade to find 10th company and find redemption.

although thats alot of marines turning traitor (more than enough for the grey knights to be sent in) its sounds pretty good