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According to the rulebook, Page 48

"... with a special unit they cannot leave during the game. ... Counts as a character upgrade until all of the other members of this unit are killed, at which point it starts counting as an independent character and will do so for the rest of the game."

under retinues.

Firstly, does this mean my captain can't leave his command squad until they all kick it?

And, with Marneus calgar, he can have three retinue squads does this mean he can be attached to three honour guard squads at once?

No. Because the command squad is NOT a retinue

Which answers your last question - like any other IC he can join one unit at a time.

There are very few Retinues left in 5th edition(and all of them are left over from previous edition codices).

The closest thing to a retinue in 5th is The techmarine + Thunder Fire Cannon; They are a single Artillery unit but in the event that the TFC is destroyed the techmarine becomes an independent character(it is not defined as an IC w/Retinue but the end results are mostly the same).

Witch hunters, Black Templar, and Tau are the only armies that still have retinues(And they are 3rd or 4th edition Codices).

Also the Hive Tyrant once it joins a unit of Tyrant Guard.

Homer

Not true, as the HT is NEVER an IC.

It joins "as if it were", but it never has the rule to begin with, and never regains it when the TG die. Its why the combined unit is only worth 1KP despite starting off as 2.

I was going with the "close to a retinue" definition. The important bits being that you can't get singled out by shooting or combat and the only way to leave is one or the other gets killed.

Homer