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I'll start taking pics, I promise!

Tonight I played my weekly game versus my pal Josh, who plays Tau. Tonight I brought my favorite army, Chaos, with my favorite kind of list, all Tzeentch, to the field! My list looked something like this:

Chaos Lord- Mark of Tzeentch, Daemon Weapon, Terminator Armor

Chaos Terminators (x4)- Chainfist x2, Heavy Flamer, Combi-Flamer
Dedicated Transport- Chaos Land Raider, Daemonic Possession

Thousand Sons x9- Sorc has Gift of Chaos, Rhino
Thousand Sons x9- Sorc has Gift of Chaos, Rhino

Autolas Predator
Autolas Predator


I like taking things in multiples. If you've read the last battle report you will see that he has the same list written up, but I shall post it none-the-less.

Crisis Commander- Autocannon and Plasma

Cirsis x3- Melta and Plasma
Crisis x2- Melta, Plasma, and Shield Drone
Crisis x2- Melta, Plasma, and Shield Drone

Pathfinders x3- Markerlights, Devilfish

Fire Warriors x9- Devilfish
Fire Warriors x6
Fire Warriors x6
Kroot x10

Railhead
Railhead


I ask him to determine what kind of game we are playing. He rolls off and the game comes out to be Annihilation with Spearhead Deployment. I love this game type and deployment (/sarcasm)! I end up deployed and mobilizing first, let's rock and roll!

I pick the side that has the worst cover and deploy opposite to force him on a bad quarter. I'm such a nice guy, aren't I? I deploy one Rhino sideways with the Land Raider behind it to claim cover. The other Rhino is parked butt to butt with the first one. The predators are behind this Rhino. I did this in the occasion of "Seize the Initiative." He failed anyways. He deploys the Tau way, far back. He had his Devilfish at about the 12" line as well, due to the way the ruins (D&D Player Books? Yeah)were placed. His Hammerheads were along the sides, and a squad of Pathfinders on the second (and only) floor of the ruins. A FW squad accompanied them. Another squad of Fire Warriors deployed near the line, with Kroot strangely behind them. The three crisis squad with the commander was behind one of the Devilfish IIRC. The other two Crisis squads in reserve. I already see error in his deplyment. Why hide your Railheads so far back when they always get a cover save if I'm more than 12" away? He boxed himself in. In my path to greatness, I decided if there is any time to learn how to multi-assault, now is the time. I deployed in about 30 seconds, he probably took 10 minutes. I think this might has intimidated him a little bit, as a friend, Thomas, who is going to start Fantasy (me Tomb Kings, as I <3 Egypt and him Empire, he loves artillery and the French) with me was watching this game. They are different games, but some concepts apply to both and he has never seen a wargame before. Anyway, it's game time!

PS- I'm 18, Thomas is 19, Josh is 20 I think. Here is a bad and first attempt at fluff.

An unnamed Chaos Lord, blessed by Tzeentch, surveys the potential site for the upcoming ritual. His two accompanying Sorcerers remain by his side, ready for orders from their dark master. As they begin to get started several vehicles, skimmers by the looks of it, peek over the horizon. He has spent too much time searching for the ideal conditions, and he will certainly not be interrupted by these trifling Tau. The Sorcerers are charged to bring souls into the empty armor of their old friends. The cadres closes in further, ready to dismantle the baroque forces that lay before them. To battle!

Chaos 1: My Rhinos, Land Raider, and one Predator charge forward and pop smoke. The Rhino that was blocking the Land Raider disembarks the Thousand Sons. The unmoved Predator fires at a Devilfish, giving it a stunned result. The Autocannon seemed to outperform the Lascannons. My Thousand Sons melt the forward Fire Warrior Squad with Warp Fire Bolts, and the Sorc casts a spell in the later phase to turn a Kroot into a Chaos Spawn. In Assault the Chaos Spawn kills two Kroot, and the Kroot take away two wounds from him. No saves versus no saves!

Tau 1: He has trouble shuffling around due to being in such a boxy formation, but he pivots a few vehicles and moves his Crisis Suits. His Railheads destroy the Rhino that was disembarked upon and stun the Predator that didn't move. His Fire Warrior squad in the ruin glanced two stun results on my loaded Rhino. The Thousand Sons squad in the open is brought down the Sorcerer and a joe. In assault phase he Frenches the crisis commander into some Fire Warriors and his Crisis Suits a little down more. Just by looking I can tell that they aren't far enough. He underestimates the power of the Dark Gods.


Chaos 2: This is the turning point of the entire game, right here, right now. I move my Land Raider forward and move my Chaos Lord/Terminator deathstar towards his suits. I position them cleverly. I move the two Thousand Sons into the Land Raider to prevent them from getting slaughtered. My predator stuns the Devilfish in front of it. Back to the cool squad. The Lord fires AP 3 shots to weaken the Crisis suit squad. I split assault his two Crisis suits and the Fire Warriors with Commander and throw the Chaos Spawn in there for good measure. No Terminators die, but the Spawn does. Let's just say that after Chainfists and insane attacks from the Chaos Lord there is absolutely nothing remaining. Cover is for bad noobs , all non-vehicles in this army have a 4+ invulnerable save. From here Josh's morale dropped a little, and I calmly explained close combat to Thomas, both mechanic wise and the Tau bone and flesh spraying onto my Tactical Dreadnought Armour from the edge of my Chainfists.

Read at your own risk:


Tau 2: Neither Crisis Squads come in. He doesn't exactly have much to do, so he unloads on the Terminators. He drops the guy with the Heavy Flamer and Combi-Flamer along with removing a wound from the Chaos Lord. After that he rolls to hit with his Railgun... Hit! Then to penetrate my armor... Miss! Then his next Railhead. He repeats. Roll to hit- Hit! (Damn!) Then rolls to pen- Rolls a six! (feth, no cover save.) Rolls a two! Weapon Destroyed! A Lascannon is torn off of my Land Raider. His turn ends.


Chaos 3: I cleverly move around my Terminators with plans for more multi-assaults. My targets: Six Pathfinders, a Hammerhead, and the two Gun Drones. Both Predators fire at the Hammerhead I plan to assault, and they manage to break through that stupid Disruption Pod! Better yet, I immobilize it! The Rhino with Thousand Sons moves up and disembarks behind the untouched Devilfish, preparing the glance it to death. I only stun it, but it's better than nothing. Now an evil grin spreads across my face. First Terminator successfully gets into contact with the Hammerhead. Then the Chaos Lord moves as towards the first, remaining in coherency, and gets into combat with the Path Finders. Now the last Terminator moves towards the Chaos Lord, remains in coherecy, and assaults the two Gun Drones. Yeah boy, it's a cluster feth. Once Justin walked into close combat, there were no survivors.

Tau 3: Now he is getting even more upset, with losing two Squads of guys and his Hammerhead. I'm having trouble hiding the beaming expression on my face. I look at Thomas and smile at him. He acknowledges my brutality. Man those +D6 power weapon attacks are nasty. Anyway, one Crisis Squad comes in behind my Land Raider. He chose a careful location in order not to mishap. At first he scatters, but he has a reroll from the Devilfish. From only the Melta Guns matter. One is within Melta Range, the other isn't by only about half an inch. The 2d6 armor pen melta misses, but the other hits. Unfortunately he does nothing. There was minor shooting that I don't remember because nothing happens. Oh, a Devilfish rams and Rhino but nothing happens.

Chaos 4: Between my consolidation and the Chaos Lord walking away from his retinue, I prepare for combat once more. I walked the Lord towards the Fire Warriors and the remaining two Terminators towards the Crisis Suits that came down. I licked my lips for the coming combat. Other minor things happened, but their importance is irrelevant considering my lust for close combat. Strangely enough one Crisis Suits survives, but his bud and drone dies. He luckily holds fast. The Chaos Lord, on the other hand, has his Daemon Weapon rebel. I take a wound, only having one left now. Both Fire Warriors hit and wound, but my Chaos Armour holds fast.

Tau 4: Crisis Squad comes in behind the Predator that moved. They shoot and only manage to stun it, unfortunately. It seems the worse his mood got the worse his dice rolling got. Shame, really. Nothing of value happened, as the Thousand Sons were brochillen and everything else was in combat or a tank. His Railguns couldn't seem to destory my Land Raider. I guess it's too quick to get hit by them. Combat happens, he has nothing left at the end of it. Only his Hammerhead, two Devilfish, and two Suits are left. He concedes.

Our unknown hero smiles as the last forces of the Tau are round up and brutally sacrificed to his dark master. Power courses through him, enhancing his brutality and strength even further. "No, it's not quite time yet, not time."

It was a good idea that he conceded. I still had most of my army ready to kill, and surely would've tabled him if we played to the end. I'm a nice guy and try to help during the game, but I didn't think that the game would end up that brutal. In fact, I didn't even think I had a good list. The Chaos Lord, Land Raider, and Terminators just waded through his army. The Predators actually did well, which is a first to me. Not only that, the look on his face was priceless when I told him my Thousand Sons were AP 3. If turn 5 would've gone down I would've moved my Terminators towards his Railhead, melted his Crisis Suits with his Thousand Sons, and used Lascannons on his Devilfish.

I told him that he really needs to work on deployment and placement with his units, which I believe to be one of the most important things in 40k. I'm also going to help him revise his list so that he stands a better chance in the future. Thomas thought wargaming was fun, so into Empire he goes! (and into TK I go, tee hee hee. I've been wanting to play them for over a year now, even when they had the bad army book!)

Questions? Comments? Concerns?

Cool bat rep. Just remember to not be too smug. It sucks to lose bad, but evem worse if some one rubs it in. But sounds like a good game and a hard lesson learned. Good job Freemason

Good read, thanks for that (: More souls for the Chaos Gods!

I only get smug with my 1k Sons, their invul is hilarious. Once I had a devastator squad fire a MM, PC, ML, and LC at them. I lost two guys lol! That squad was dismantled by my sons next turn I try to be nice and help my foe if theyre losing.

Two of my favorite armies. This is exactly how it plays out with my buddy when we play. He wiffs all his super important railgun shots that can change the game, then in go the berserkers. . .

We all know how that (usually) ends.

Tau need an update bad. as well as my CSM cohorts