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Made in us
Mutated Chosen Chaos Marine







This is the tale of a Grot named Tezit, who defied all the odds. It does not begin with Tezit on an elite Commando mission to kill a Primarch or him single handedly defeating a hive fleet. It doesn't even begin with him leading troops or training. It begins with him as a rather squeamish and pathetic slave in the service of an ungrateful Biker.



Biker Narbotz Killbusta was in an understandably upset mood. His Warbike was broken, no longer capable of going supah fast or even just normal fast at all, and the slimy git Mekboy Zhuff wasn't willing to help after Narbotz knocked the teef out of his mouth during a heated argument. As such Narbotz had handed the responsibility of fixing his bike to his only surviving Grot slave, a squeaky Gretchin with unusually small ears named Tezit. "You betta fix it soon or I'm gunna be eatin' Grot tonight!" bellowed Narbotz, stomping to accentuate his point.

Tezit had never fixed a bike in his life, let alone been permitted to touch one. He nervously poked the bike and instinctively withdrew his hand. "Wot are ya doing?" the Biker demanded. "Fix it!"

Once again the Gretchin poked the bike. Once again he withdrew his hand. "Fix it!" Now, not as afraid of touching it, he examined it for any flaws. Beyond several missing wires, a cracked open engine and a large bomb strapped to the ignition, Tezit couldn't find any problems. He scratched his forehead in confusion. "Fix it ya Gobbitz!" Tezit reached forward and jammed a disconnected wire into the engine. "Therez ya go," the Biker said. He jumped onto the bike and hit the ignition. The bike made a terrible mechanical noise reminiscent of a grenade detonating inside of a Necron. yet nothing happened. "Dum grot! Fix it or I'm gonna crump ya!"

Tezit nervously squeaked, "I can't figur out what's wrong wit it! All the gas and lights and explody tings is in the right place! It don't make sense!"

"Well it betta make sense or I'm gonna crump you!" Narbotz yelled. He reached for a blood stained choppa.

"No wait! I'll fix it!" Frantically, Tezit plugged random wires in, flipped several switches, detached a tube from the engine and attached it to the handlebar. To top this off, he grabbed a hammer and whacked the engine repeatedly while screaming, "I'll fix it!" Finally he stopped and fell limp, panting hard.

Narbotz growled, "Ya better" and stepped onto the bike. He flipped two switches and hit the ignition. It was unclear what happened after that. A massive plume of fire and smoke shot forth from the bike; it roared like some sort of mechanical beast. Wheels spun at lightning speeds, burning away the ground underneath. Narbotz sailed off into the distance, his bike riding faster than ever before. A crowd watched both the bike and Tezit in silent awe. Finally, one Ork stepped forward and said, "Dis one is betta then any Mekboy." Tezit wasn't sure how to respond.



Tezit was having difficulty adjusting to his new promotion. "Fix it!" shouted the driver, a blind Ork known as Noneyez. Long ago in a freak accident the driver had crashed his prized Wartrukk and a sizable chunk of shrapnel had been embedded in his face and eyes. It was still there many years later, but chunks of it had rusted off. Right now it looked like the Wartrukk was on the verge of another accident. Loaded up with thirteen boys, a Wartrakk and the bike of Tezit's former owner, Narbotz, it had already been unstable. Following a blast from a meltagun and a Basilisk ramming it (The Basilisk was still on the Wartrukk, having impaled it on the midsection and become stuck) it didn't look like it was going to last much longer. The engine had malfunctioned and was now refusing to stop. In addition to this the steering had broke. As a result the Wartrukk was blazing ahead at top speed towards a cliff. "Fix it!"

Boyz were swarming frantically over the vehicle, yelling and fighting. Narbotz was shouting furiously, trying to fend off a Grot named Barth who was trying to steal his bike. The Basilisk hatch popped open and an oomie with a big hat and a shotgun popped out. The shotgun barked twice and two Boyz tumbled off of the careening vehicle, dead. "Fix it!" The cliff was nearing. The shotgun fired again and another Boy feel to his doom. Instead of fixing it, Tezit was having a nervous breakdown. The oomie with the shotgun noticed Tezit and the driver. Tezit ducked but Noneyez, failing to see the weapon, was too slow. A blast immediately slew him.

Another shotgun blast went by Tezit. He frantically ran to the vehicle controls and hit random buttons. The grot could see that the cliff wasn't more than forty feet ahead; the Wartrukk would hit it no time. "I'm outta here!" shouted Narbotz. He leapt onto his bike and drove as fast as he could, flying off of the trukk to land directly in front of it. Tezit could only watch as Narbotz was run down. The bike was destroyed and the Biker was pinned to the grill. He was doing something Tezit had never seen him do before; screaming. "Fix it, Tezit! Fix it!"

Tezit remembered something. He grabbed his old hammer and struck the controls. Nothing happened. "Tezit, fix it!" The grot frantically struck the controls again and again as Narbotz continued to scream. "Fix it!" Now the cliff was ten feet ahead and the vehicle was faster than ever before. He struck one last time and... it stopped. The engine exploded and the emergency breaks activated. However, the boyz and the oomie on top of the trukk did not stop moving and plunged to their deaths over the cliff. Nargotz luckily was pinned to the grill and as such remained where he was. Tezit somehow survived as well, having latched onto the steering wheel and held for dear life. Narbotz sighed in relief. "Ya did it ya stupid Grot. Now get me outta this."



Many more promotions had followed after this. Tezit was seldom known as a Grot anymore, but rather by the title of "Mekankick." He was the subject of hate by everybody Mekboy in the Waagh! He, a foolish Gretchin, had stolen their jobs and reputations. It was said that with several well calculated hammer blows Tezit could fix anything. Now this was going to be put to the test. This is the defining moment of Tezit's short life.



Warboss Grumnish Blastadeath growled, "Fix it Mekankick!" The artificial gravity briefly failed and pummeled him against the ceiling, but it quickly resumed. "Fix it!" The Ork Battleship Explod N' Die was failing fast. Its lower half had been blown off, with Orks tumbling out from the ship's gaping wounds by the thousands. Explod N' Die was surging down into the atmosphere at thousands of miles per hour and in its damaged state it certainly couldn't survive such a crash. "Fix it!" From the control room, Tezit glanced at a map of the ship. Slightly larger than a city, Tezit found himself easily overwhelmed by it. "Fix it!"

He reared his head at the Warboss and shouted, "I'm tryin'! Shut yer yap!"

"Why I oughta..." growled Grumnish, taking a step towards Tezit.

"You oughta nothing! Without me this ship 'ill never be fixed! Ya should be glad I'm doing this for free!"

Grumnish took a step back and sat down, but was still bristling with rage. "Dumb Mekankick," he muttered. Tezit ignored the comment and set to work. He flipped on array of switches, accidentally launching several hundred missiles. "That was on purpose," he explained. "We gotz to get the extra weight out." The Mekankick turned a knob and pressed two red buttons and a blue one. One large portion of the ship exploded in a plume of flame. "That was on purpose also. Ya see, most flaming things are flying, right? So that meanz dat the moar fire something has the moar likely it is to fly." Continuing on towards another portion of the control panel, Tezit flicked a switch back and forth before ripping the switch off. The artificial gravity failed and several Orks were sucked into the back of the ship. Grumnish was sent flying out the door and another Ork was crushed against a portion of the wall. The Mekankick held onto the control panel for dear life. He glanced at a holoscreen.

According to the screen, the ship was going to collide with the surface in "6." Unsure if the "6" represented seconds, minutes or hours, Tezit chose to ignore it and resumed his work. He pressed as many buttons as he could, turned several knobs and turned random switches. Finally, he drew his hammer. Glancing back at the screen, it now said "2.77777777777778." He whacked the panel as hard as he could. To Tezit's horror, nothing changed save the holoscreen, which now said "2.43." He whacked it again. "2.26." And again. "ERROR 8888888." And again. "1.7." And again. "1.3282." And again. "0.91." He realized it wasn't working.

Turning towards the Orks somehow still in the Control Room he shouted, "I need a bigga 'ammer! This one won't work!"

An Ork silently pulled out a massive, glowing hammer inscribed with ancient runes and a picture of a two headed Eagle. "Its a Fundah 'Ammer!" he explained as he tossed it to Tezit. The Thunder Hammer was large than Tezit and contained ancient technology worthy of Ghrazghkull Thraka himself. The Grot was forced to let go of the panel to grab it. As he was sucked backwards away from the panel, he struck out wildly with the Thunder Hammer. It hit the control panel with a triumphant boom. The panel exploded, sending metal plates and clumps of electronics in all directions. Explod N' Die made a horrific noise that could somehow be heard in space and beyond. People reported hearing it on a planet three systems away and thought they were being orbitally bombarded. The artificial gravity resumed and Tezit glanced out of a porthole to see that the ship was slowing down and backing away from the planet. Grumnish stormed into the room and said, "Well, ya did it Mekankick. Gud job."
   
Made in gb
Unshakeable Grey Knight Land Raider Pilot





United Kingdom

Dude, Nice story!

I like several things about it:

1) It's not about Space Marines

2) It's very Orky

3) It's not some epic battle or one-on-one face off

4) It's not about Space Marines

It's amusing how no-one seems very appreciative of his "work", but they are orks

Very nice, I'd love to hear more about Tezit's exploits! I might even make a model of him, with rules and such, with your permission of course

   
Made in us
Agile Revenant Titan






Oregon

I love this story! I shall be following Tezit's exploits as well.

Eldar -5000 points 
   
Made in us
Mutated Chosen Chaos Marine







Thanks! Feel free to make a model of him with rules; I consider it complement! I'll probably write more Tezit stories, since they would mostly follow a roughly similar format with maybe a few variations. I'm considering writing another one involving an erupting volcano, a Battlewagon, a Deff Dread and an Eversor Temple Assassin.
   
Made in us
Agile Revenant Titan






Oregon

Nice! I was actually thinking about putting a Tezit on either my FW Avatar’s spear, or riding my Broodlord.
As for the stats...
WS: 8
BS: 9
S: 10
T: 7
W: 9
I: 10
LD: 10
SV: 2+, 2+ invul

This message was edited 1 time. Last update was at 2011/10/25 00:27:06


Eldar -5000 points 
   
Made in us
Kinebrach-Knobbling Xeno Interrogator





Massachusetts

"gud job" ter you sir, for writing up that epic unique story! I look forward to more of tezit's exploits...

Skalk Bloodaxe wrote:When the Death Guard and World Eater forces split after their last battle as allies, this particular Champion simply loaded his squad into the wrong Rhino and has yet to notice.

Yggdrasil wrote:"First shalt thou take out your whole Unholy Army. Then shalt thou count to Seven, no more, no less. Seven shall be the number thou shalt count, and the number of the counting shall be Seven. Eight shalt thou not count (bloody -fanatics), neither count thou six (fing sex-addicts), excepting that thou then proceed to Seven. Nine is right out (goddn mock seers) . Once the number seven, being the seventh number, be reached, then formest thou thy first Plague Marine squad. Likewise, thou shall marshall thy remaining troops in squads of Seven, and Seven shall be the number of brothers in each of your squad."
 
   
Made in us
Agile Revenant Titan






Oregon

You must continue!

Eldar -5000 points 
   
Made in se
Unhealthy Competition With Other Legions




Filipstad, Sweden.

Great story! Original and funny. Me likey! +1

"You have ruled this galaxy for ten thousand years, yet have little of account to show for you efforts. Order. Unity. Obedience. We taught the galaxy these things, and we shall do so again."

 
   
Made in us
Mutated Chosen Chaos Marine







Thanks! There will be a new part tomorrow. Here's a preview;

It was too late. The Battlewagon soared over the lip of the volcano, the intense heat scorching off the paintjob as it did so. Tongues of flame reached out and grabbed the soaring vehicle, torching assorted Astartes and Boyz. Roaring, Grumnish tackled the Chaplain. Both figures bumped into the already swaying Deff Dread. The already swaying Deff Dread toppled and rolled off into the volcano below. Before even hitting the lava metal plates melted away, a testament to the sheer heat. Tezit could only watch. "Fix it!" yelled Grumnish.
   
Made in us
Mutated Chosen Chaos Marine







Just had tooth pulled (about 10 min ago). Delirious from pain meds. No better time to write then now.

Tezit didn't trust Mekboy Blug very much. Blug was notoriously hostile, incompetent and arrogant, always searching for real (or imagined) insults. As such, the Mekankick was surprised at the result of Blug's grappling gun. With a mechanical hiss and a loud grinding noise, a massive grappling hook to a chain shot out and stabbed into the Ultramarine Landraider, digging through the hall surprisingly easily and latching on. "Told ya it would work!" Blug shouted, risking a glance away from where he was driving to Tezit. That was when the Battlewagon hit the Terminator. To this day, it is not known who the unfortunate Terminator was or why he was there. All that is known was that he hit the Deff Rolla hard, cracking open his ceramite chest and rending apart his legs. What was left of the Ultramarine was launched by the Deff Rolla into the cockpit (a consequence of Blug's ineptness in designing the Battlewagon) and crushed Blug and the control panel. He attempted to grab his Stormbolter and fire on the Orks in the vehicle, but Grumnish's powerclaw stopped him.

Now, with no driver or controls, the Battlewagon was going out of control. It was completely dependent on the Landraider it had grappled onto. Thus, the logical course of action was to break the chain, patiently wait for the vehicle to stop and then get out and continue the battle on foot. This occurred to no one.

It appears I do not have time to finish. I will write the ending and edit this later. Sorry.

   
Made in se
Unhealthy Competition With Other Legions




Filipstad, Sweden.

Must... have... MORE!

"You have ruled this galaxy for ten thousand years, yet have little of account to show for you efforts. Order. Unity. Obedience. We taught the galaxy these things, and we shall do so again."

 
   
Made in gb
Unshakeable Grey Knight Land Raider Pilot





United Kingdom

Stop teasing us Tezits exploits must continue!
   
Made in us
Mutated Chosen Chaos Marine







Finished! Wow, this ended up really long.

Tezit didn't trust Mekboy Blug very much. Blug was notoriously hostile, incompetent and arrogant, always searching for real (or imagined) insults. As such, the Mekankick was surprised at the result of Blug's grappling gun. With a mechanical hiss and a loud grinding noise, a massive grappling hook to a chain shot out and stabbed into the Ultramarine Landraider, digging through the hall surprisingly easily and latching on. "Told ya it would work!" Blug shouted, risking a glance away from where he was driving to Tezit. That was when the Battlewagon hit the Terminator. To this day, it is not known who the unfortunate Terminator was or why he was there. All that is known was that he hit the Deff Rolla hard, cracking open his ceramite chest and rending apart his legs. What was left of the Ultramarine was launched by the Deff Rolla into the cockpit (a consequence of Blug's ineptness in designing the Battlewagon) and crushed Blug and the control panel. He attempted to grab his Stormbolter and fire on the Orks in the vehicle, but Grumnish's powerclaw stopped him.

Now, with no driver or controls, the Battlewagon was going out of control (as could be expected). It was completely dependent on the Landraider it had grappled onto. Thus, the logical course of action was to break the chain, patiently wait for the vehicle to stop and then get out and continue the battle on foot. This occurred to no one. "Kill the Sphess Mehrens!" bellowed Grumnish. The Warboss grabbed onto the chain and began to inch himself across. Without hesitation the sixteen or so Boyz left followed. "Mekankick, come with us!" the Warboss ordered.

"Why?" asked Tezit. In the olden days he would've been terrified to question the Warboss, but with his enhanced standing he wasn't afraid of Ork. The Mekankick heard a loud rumbling noise and the ground shifted; he wondered why. Suddenly, the volcano ahead of the Land Raider erupted. It was an amazing site, proving that nature was just as skilled in the art of dakka as Orks. Hundreds of tons of rocks and debris were sent flying in all directions, rolling down the mountainside and crushing Orks and Astartes alike. Plumes of smoke and ash rose up from the explosion, polluting the normally blue skies. Rivers of lava gushed down, carving molten paths in the ancient stone. Both the Land Raider and the Battlewagon rocked violently, sending Boyz and Grots flying off to their demise. One notable Grot, who had been clinging onto a flagpole, was hit by a tumbling boulder while in midair and died before even hitting the ground.

Tezit tumbled back from the impact and fell inside one of the many bunker type rooms of the Land Raider. He rubbed his forehead groggily and noticed something blue and red in his peripheral vision. The Mekankick turned towards it and realized what it was; the Terminator. He was missing both of his legs and his Stormbolter arm. His normally royal blue ceramite armor was cracked, burnt and soaked with blood. In his one remaining arm he hosted a massive powerfist. The Ultramarine slowly inched toward Tezit. "Foul Xeno," he said with a throaty voice. "My claw will be the last thing you ever see."

The Mekankick ran towards the door and noted it had slammed shut. He tried to wrench it open; it was locked from the outside. That idiot Blug had installed it backwards. Tezit turned around to face the Terminator, who was drawing closer. He searched frantically for a weapon but could only find his hammer intended for percussive maintenance. "Stand back!" shouted Tezit. "I'll fix you up real good! I'm the Mekankick!"

The Terminator laughed as he drew nearer. "I am a three hundred year old scion of the Emperor, forged in his image. My armor is a hundred centuries old, a holy relic from a distant time. My powerfist was forged personally on Mars by the greatest Adepts. My hate is undying and my wrath unstoppable. But you, you are a Gretchin, a slave to even fouler Xenos than yourself. You are nothing beyond another kill that shalled be etched on my bolter."

Tezit was terrified now. He heard a grinding noise outside and realized it was probably the Deff Dread. "If only it was in here," he muttered. Of course, the Deff Dread could never fit inside the room. It was a miracle that the Deff Dread had even been hoisted on top of the Battle Wagon at all. The Mekankick realized he needed to reach the Deff Dread somehow; but the only way out was through the broken door, which was put in backwards and had strangely locked. That was when it hit Tezit; the door was broken and therefore he could fix it. Tezit began to whack and pull the doorknob in a desperate attempt to somehow fix the door. The Ultramarine was drawing closer. Tezit wiggled it back and forth, stuck his finger in the lock, twisted randomly, pulled it out, punched the doorknob, pulled on the door and slapped the doorknob frantically. Finally, he pulled out his trusty hammer and whacked the knob as hard as he could. The door flung open and Tezit ran out.

"Run while you can, filthy Xeno! Justice is coming and you shall soon be granted the death you so dearly deserve!" shouted the Ultramarine, still inching after Tezit. He left a large blood smear while he crawled, somehow still alive from his extensive injuries.

The Mekankick sprinted towards the Deff Dread and risked a glance at the Land Raider. What he saw horrified him. Its top hatch had opened and Astartes and Boyz were wrestling on top of the vehicle. Grumnish of all Orks was fleeing across the chain back towards the Battle Wagon and a black figure with a skull mask was following him. Tezit recognized the figure as a "Caplin," something that was kind of like a Warboss for "Sphess Mahrens" only not really. They were notable for krumping their own Boyz almost as much as they were for krumpin' the enemy. Tezit reached the Deff Dread and squeaked, "I'm the Mekankick! There's a Sphess Mahren tryin' to kill me! If you save me I'll fix ya up if you get broken! Now save me!"

Stupid grot replied the Deff Dread. I dun take orders from no Grot.

"I'm the Mekankick!" Tezit shouted, horrified. He looked back and saw the Ultramarine crawling after him still and muttering something about how its always the times when you need legs that they've been blown off. "Save me!"

The Deff Dread made a horrible mechanical noise. It took a moment for the Mekankick to realize that was it laughing. An Ork is an Ork and a Grot is a Grot. "Mekankick" dun mean nothing to me. I'm twenty tons of metal killy-ness, bigger than a Warboss and stronger than one too. I dun't take orders from the Warboss even, why would I take orders from a Grot?

"But I'm the-" The Deff Dread cut him off. Hey, I see a Sphess Marine! Get outta my way "Mekankick," I'm gunna go krump it! Tezit sighed in relief, realizing the Dread was going to save him, even if it didn't realize it was. The massive technological beast lumbered past him and activated a rusty buzzsaw. Yer gunna ragret comin' on this Battlewagon ya big 'ummie the Deff Dread threatened.

"You don't scare me!" the Ultramarine shouted. In response, the Deff Dread swung the buzzsaw down. It cut through ceramite and flesh alike, ravaging the already crippled Astartes. His helmet flew off, revealing the bloodstained and badly cut face understand. Before the Deff Dread could finish him off, the Battlewagon rocked violently and he tumbled off. Tezit picked up the Terminator helmet. It reminded him of an attack squid. Despite how ridiculously oversized it was, he put it on and stood triumphantly.

Grumnish finished climbing across the chain and jumped onto the Battlewagon. The Chaplain followed, a glowing mace in hand. "Mekankick, the Land Raider's driver was blown up!" shouted the Warboss. "It's headin' for the volcano! You gotta fix this Battle Wagon so that we don't go in with it!" The Mekankick sprinted inside the Battlewagon and went through a series of labyrinthine hallways and quarters before he reached the cockpit. What was left of Blug was crushed into the seat and would be impossible to clean up. The control panel was ripped apart and destroyed. Its steering wheel was broken in half. Tezit looked out the broken window and was horrified at what he saw.

The Land Raider was dragging the Battle Wagon towards the lip of the volcano at insane speeds, going over lava patches and jagged rock with ease. Though the Battle Wagon was managing to follow, it wasn't doing well. Tires and tank treads had been shredded to bits. The metal underbelly of the vehicle was melting away. Any semblance of a paintjob had been scorched off, burning the vehicle an ashy black. Tezit realized it would be impossible to fix the Battle Wagon, as there simply wasn't enough left to fix. He didn't have the time or supplies to rebuild it either. There was only one course of action; he needed to break the chain off before the Land Raider reached the volcano.

He ran back out to the outside of the Battle Wagon just in time to see it happen. The Ultramarine Land Raider was only a few feet away from the crater and was going faster than Wazdakka when turbo boosting. It was already too late. The Battlewagon soared over the lip of the volcano along with the Astartes tank. Tongues of flame reached out and grabbed the soaring vehicles, torching assorted Astartes and Boyz alike. Roaring, Grumnish tackled the Chaplain. Both figures bumped into the Deff Dread, which was having a difficult time balancing. The already swaying Deff Dread toppled and rolled off into the volcano below. Before even hitting the lava metal plates melted away, a testament to the sheer heat. Tezit could only watch. "Fix it!" yelled Grumnish.

A massive belch of lava came up and obliterated the Land Raider but the Battle Wagon continued on. Miraculously it reached the other side and slammed into the ground. It swayed wildly, wheels breaking and rolling off as it did so. Now the Battle Wagon was going downhill and was going fast. The Chaplain, the Warboss and the Mekankick were the only figures left alive, everyone else either having been slain, melted or crushed. "We're going too fast!" Grumnish yelled as he pushed the Crozius Arcanum away from his face with his powerclaw. The Chaplain drew a bolt pistol and shot Grumnish in the face but he didn't seem to care. "Slow us down or we're gonna get krumped against a rock wall! Fix it!"

"I can't!" replied the Mekankick. "There just isn't enuf to fix!"

"Yes there is!" Grumnish replied as he was shot again in the head. Blood was streaming down his lumpy forehead and into his oversized mouth. In his weakened state he couldn't hold the Crozius Arcanum back anymore. It slammed into his chest, burning through bone and flesh alike. The Warboss grunted in pain and was hit again in the arm. It ripped off and his powerclaw tumbled away. With his remaining arm, Grumnish grabbed the power weapon and stopped it from hitting him again. In response the Chaplain shot his face again. He groaned and his arm went limp, allowing the Crozius Arcanum to hit him in the face. His jaw broke. His eye sockets crumpled in. His teeth tumbled out. His forehead became a blood mess of jagged bone. Somehow still alive, Grumnish yelled, "There always is! Fix it!"

Seeing the Warboss so determined even in his dying state stirred emotions Tezit hadn't felt since he fixed Narbotz's bike long ago. Now he only focused on completing his job, no matter how impossible or insane it seemed. He sprinted to the cockpit and whacked the broken control panel with his hammer again and again. The Battle Wagon still roared downhill so Tezit hit harder. Soon he was attacking the control panel with the power not of a cowardly Grot, but of a being so motivated he was able to tap into strength he had never even felt before. Finally the vehicle stopped.

It hit the brakes so jarringly that the Chaplain and Grumnish were sent flying. They soared over the top of the vehicle and slammed hard into the volcano rocks below. The Chaplain died instantly but Grumnish was somehow still clinging onto life. He turned towards the Mekankick and stared at him through the broken glass of the cockpit. "Ya fixed it," he said. "Gud job ya dumb Grot." He coughed; blood and teeth came out. "My life is fadin'. My Waagh! is over. But you..." He pointed with a broken finger. "You keep on fixin' till yer Waagh! ends too. Us Orkses... we need Grotz like you. We need Grotz who can fix tings even when there's nofin to fix." He brought his hand up and saluted Tezit as clumps of broken bone toppled out from his open forehead. "I salute ya Mekankick, only now when I'm goin' to meet Mork and Gork. I hope dat stupid 'oomie who broke my face gets to meet Gork and Mork too, so they can krump him with the strength of the gods." And with that comment, the Warboss fell silent.

"This Waagh! wasn't good enough for you," murmured Tezit. He saluted the corpse back.

This message was edited 2 times. Last update was at 2011/10/30 01:57:51


 
   
Made in gb
Unshakeable Grey Knight Land Raider Pilot





United Kingdom

*Girly Scream*

That was AWESOME!

I love the way grumnish survives for so long

Very good story, I really enjoyed it!
Well Done
   
Made in us
Agile Revenant Titan






Oregon

Looks great, LoneLictor!

Eldar -5000 points 
   
Made in us
Agile Revenant Titan






Oregon

Must do more!

Eldar -5000 points 
   
Made in us
Mutated Chosen Chaos Marine







Tezit shall return within the next week. Thanks for the comments!
   
Made in no
Terrifying Doombull





Hefnaheim

By the dark gods! This is hillarious, we do requier MOAR! MOAR I TELL TEE
   
Made in gb
Unshakeable Grey Knight Land Raider Pilot





United Kingdom

Your more than welcome, Mr. Lictor

Who needs the black library, eh?
   
Made in us
Mutated Chosen Chaos Marine







Here's the first thirdish of the new part. I'll edit this and add in the triumphant conclusion tomorrow. Thanks for reading!

No one was quite sure what it was. Originally it had started out as a lone DeffKopta that the Mekboy Lumbaz had spent all of his time upgrading (out of some strange compulsion). Upon acquiring a Wartrakk he had made some peculiar modifications (turning the turret upside down, removing on the trakks and attached a dead squig to the engine) and attached what remained of it to the DeffKopta. Now the DeffKopta couldn't fly and the Wartrakk couldn't run. Lumbaz lost all respect from the other Orks, having dismantled two normally functional vehicles and wasted all of the dakka that had been mounted on them. His grot servants were stolen by rivals, his shop raided and his teef busted out with the blunt side of a choppa. They left behind the mechanical wreck that Lumbaz had built because it was of no value.

The Mekboy wasn't one to give up easily. He scavenged battlefields and stole tools, hoping to continue working on his creation. He looted a Warbike and fused it on to the creation. In addition to this he also added in the roof of a Battletrukk and and the engine of a Warbuggy. Finally he made the finishing touch by finding a wreck DeffKopta, repairing it as best as he could, and attaching it to the monstrosity. It now resembled a large amount of vehicles crushed together to form a mobile platform that someone had added propellers, wings and a roof onto. Several Orks gathered out to watch its test drive, hoping it would explode. Instead it flew.

Nicknamed the Skyboat, it was a sight to behold. It could fit thirty Ork boys and contained a bizarre armament that included a Stikkbomb Chukka, Snazzgun, Shoota, Rokkit Launcher and Custom Mega Blasta. Some Flash Gits revered it as a God of Dakka. Spikes and various trophy poles stabbed out from every wall, corner, gun barrel and control panel. A strange rotating grabbin' claw stuck out from the port side. The Skyboat had three cockpits and took seven Orks pilots to fly it successfully, though on most mission it was rare that it had more than two. Mekboy Lumbaz was always at the bridge of the Skyboat making sure that his creation was being taken care of.

Now Tezit was standing alongside Lumbaz watching the Mekboy scream for dear life. The Skyboat was careening over the rough waters, waves bashing up against the vehicle and overtaking the occasional Boy. That wasn't what worried the Mekboy; it was the Piranha Light Skimmer Team chasing after after the Orks, burst cannons blazing. Scorching plasma blew massive holes in both the hall and passengers alike. Behind the Piranhas was a massive Hammerhead Gunship that was closing in. Its massive Ion Cannon was rotating toward the Orks. Aboard the SkyBoat itself the Orks were in a fierce combat with a Stealth Suit team that had somehow got on board. "Tezit, fix it!" shouted the Mekboy. A burst cannon shot blew through his skull and he fell to the floor.
   
Made in us
Agile Revenant Titan






Oregon

Oooh, a nice update!

Eldar -5000 points 
   
 
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