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I have been working on writing a short story/novel about my Deathwatch character. I have posted it on fanfiction, but didn't get any criticism or helpful comments there. I hope that you guys enjoy it and tell me what you think.

http://www.fanfiction.net/s/8516154/1/Never-Forgive

Please criticise and comment either here or on fanfiction. Also, I am open to suggestion as to which characters should die, any major battles that should happen, any potential allies it can have. IF you have anything that you think I can/should add into my short story, please tell me the idea

For all you folks too lazy to go to fanfiction and the link I provided you with... (yes... TRIPLE facepalm)

Your friend,
Lord of Night