Forum adverts like this one are shown to any user who is not logged in. Join us by filling out a tiny 3 field form and you will get your own, free, dakka user account which gives a good range of benefits to you: No adverts like this in the forums anymore. Times and dates in your local timezone. Full tracking of what you have read so you can skip to your first unread post, easily see what has changed since you last logged in, and easily see what is new at a glance. Email notifications for threads you want to watch closely. Being a part of the oldest wargaming community on the net. If you are already a member then feel free to login now.

Hey all!

awhile back I started a Warhammer Tv series thread and I thought it got a pretty good reaction so without further ado I'm bringing in ideas for a series of Warhammer Childrens books

The first in this series is Abaddon poops followed by other classic titles such as The Mutation giving tree, Miss Nelson is missing and is being interrogated by the Inquisition
The Necron that stole Christmas, Horus hears a who as well as Hop on Pop and other Daemonic summoning rituals

hope you have fun with the thread!

lol

Kharn's first slaughter. Slaanesh's story on "what that's for".


...I'm gonna be a GREAT parent!

The very hungry tyranid

Harrus Potterstein and the Black Ship

Harrus Potterstein and the Soulbinding

Harrus Potterstein and the Hard but Pious life of imperial Service

Harrus Potterstein and the Sacrifice of the Golden Throne

Draigo's adventures in wonderland

I don't think I've heard of What that's for but I can only imagine and I'll have to look that up when I'm done here lol

Lightbringer I almost fell off my chair with the Harrus Potterstein series....that is awesome as well as Draigo's adventures in wonderland...I can only imagine the tea party scene and who will be the Mad Hatter?

Excerpt from the Very Hungry Tyranid

In the light of the moon a little mycetic spore lay on a tree
one sunday morning the warm sun came up and -slup!- out of the spore came a small and very hungry Hormagant.

he started looking for some food!

On Monday he ate through one Hiver. but he was still Hungry!

On Tuesday he ate through two Sororitas but he was still hungry!

oh and one more book! Clifford the Big Red Squiggoth

One Tau Two Tau Red Tau Blue Tau - by Dr Horuess

Read with gork and mork.

See mork run.
See gork chase
Chase chase chase.
See gork smash mork.
Smash smash smash.

Goodbye Moon

A Childrens bedtime story about Abaddons Planet Killer

I think Dan Abnett was asked a similar question and his response was something about Timmy the Ultramarine and the Om Nom Nom Tyranids.

Dwypkkon'Rynkal

The story of the Necron that fell asleep for a billion years to wake up and see things had changed dramatically.

 DemetriDominov wrote:
Dwypkkon'Rynkal

The story of the Necron that fell asleep for a billion years to wake up and see things had changed dramatically.

.....does he have a beard?

Let me guess - most of these books will be written by the Brothers Grimmdark...

_Lightbringer_ wrote:Draigo's adventures in wonderland

I think we have a winner!

Emperors guide to stranger danger series
Book one- xenophobia for adolescents
Book 2- Traitors and how to spot them
Book 3- Kindness and mercy: how to avoid them

Green orks and Grots

Hrm, i thought that half of the current BL publications are aimed at children.

A story about kharn named "the gore-axe" by Dr. Horoose

 RogueMage wrote:

 DemetriDominov wrote:
Dwypkkon'Rynkal

The story of the Necron that fell asleep for a billion years to wake up and see things had changed dramatically.

.....does he have a beard?

Yes, but it's not his own.....

Logar and the 3,000 Sons on Fernis. Oh, how he huffed and puffed, and they still did not bow down.

All around the battlefield, the Jokearo chased the Gretchin, the Jokearo fired his lascannon, POP! goes the Gretchin.

A penny for a lasgun, a dollar for a bolter, thats the way the money goes, POP! goes the Gretchin.

Creed's got a Titan, and Calgar's got some bolters, thats the way the story goes, POP! goes the Gretchin.

Thomas The Tank - Stories about anthropomorphised Leman Russ tanks pounding foes of the God-Emperor into the dirt.

Where's Cypher? - Can you spot Cypher amongst the crowds as he gets closer and closer to Terra and the God-Emperor?

Charlie and the Chimera Factory - one boy's tale of how he rose from living in a slum with no job to living in a slum and serving the glorious God-Emperor with selfless toil.

Danny, Champion of the God-Emperor - one boy's tale of how he became the Chapter Champion.

The BFD - The cautionary tale of a boy's friendship with a Big Friendly Daemon (of Slaanesh) (and how he failed the God-Emperor)

The Lion found the Witch in a Wardrobe - A tale of heroism as one little boy exposes heresy in his own family home - all for the God-Emperor!

 Fifty wrote:


The Lion found the Witch in a Wardrobe - A tale of heroism as one little boy exposes heresy in his own family home - all for the God-Emperor!

You win an internetz

 Fifty wrote:


The Lion found the Witch in a Wardrobe - A tale of heroism as one little boy exposes heresy in his own family home - all for the God-Emperor!

The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe?

The Lion would obviously be related to Lion El'jonson, while Witch could refer to any psyker, possibly Magnus?

So maybe it would be a description of a confrontation between the Dark Angels and the Thousand Sons? How would the Wardrobe play into this?

Hmmmm... the witch could be Luther, as the Chaos Gods gave him psychic powers, and the wardrobe could be the nickname for wherever Lion is sleeping... Ah, I have an idea... Lion El'Jonson was originally named after a gay poet, who would have been "in the closet" or "in the wardrobe"

Hohoho

Shame it is not called the Wolf, The Witch and The Wardrobe. Then it could be Russ vs. Magnus

The Pycher of Oz.

The story of a sororitas flung to a strange planet by a warp storm. There she and her cyber-mastif join forces with a 3 space marines one from each of the Iron Hands, Raven Guard, and Dark Angels chapters to uncover the deception of a rouge psycher secretly manipulating the planet.

(The cowardly lion was a stretch, figured we'd go with the primarch's name...)

Little GoldiHorus Aximand and the 3 (4) daemons- a cautionary tale of messing with the powers of the warp

At the table there were 3 Offerings, "this offering is too small", exclaimed Little GoldiHorus, "this offering is too big!", "This offering is juuuust right" said little GoldiHorus Aximand as he plunged his knife into the sacrifice

(later in the story)

Little GoldiHorus Aximand came upon 4 beds "This bed is too moldy", "This bed is too bloody", "This bed is too soft", "but this bed is juuuuust right as it's a sleep number bed that changes to your contours"

later that night the 4 daemons came home...."Someone has been cleaning my blood!" exclaimed Khorne, "Someone has been disinfecting my germs" said Nurgle, "Someone hasn't been fooling around on my couch" complained Slaanesh, "Someone has left my bed exactly the way I left it" whined Tzeentch and there he is!!

GW has hinted that the Wizard of Oz took place in the Maze of Tzeentch in the Warp. Can chalk that up as one.

Horton Hears a Waaaaagh!

 Harriticus wrote:
GW has hinted that the Wizard of Oz took place in the Maze of Tzeentch in the Warp. Can chalk that up as one.

Source?

The CD Codex.

The Berenstain Bears Visit The Inquisition.

 n0t_u wrote:
The CD Codex.

Wait, I know that blip. IIRC It says the fateweaver or something had a little girl with a dog enter the maze of Tzeench and find her way out and that the daemons accused her of cheating. That was a Wizard of Oz ref... BAH! Never mind
Hm, thinking on it some more, there is a Lewis Carol reference in the space marine chapter named the Vorpal Swords. I consider every use of the word "vorpal" a Lewis Carol reference. Not least among their accomplishments was going into the Eye of Terror and making war on chaos right there in the middle of insanity and illogic. What do you suppose their battle cry is? "One two one two and through and through?"

How about "ABC's with the Space Marines."
A is for Angels of Absolution. B is for Black Templars. C is for Chainsword. D is for Deathwatch.

lol this is all great!

The Call of the WAAAAAAGH!

Trying to think of a good Winnie-the-Pooh title, 'twould be interesting.

The Kroot in the Boot,