Worst jokes you know?

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**BlapBlapBlap**

Hey,

Because I'm nothing if not a masochist, I was wondering what awful, awful jokes Dakka could compile into one putrid thread. No conditions. Puns, whatever, just follows standard Dakka rules.

To throw the first sticks on the fire:

My brother was a barrel. He was my roll model.
My father was a cart. He was a wheel life hero.
And for those of you who know the German for bicycle:
My sister was a bicycle. She was such a rad kid.

And... begin.

**azazel the cat**

"Q: What's the difference between a pile of dead prostitute torsos and a giant leather couch?
A: I don't have a giant leather couch in by basement."

I suspect this thread gets locked very, very quickly.

**CthuluIsSpy**

Let's help it along

Spoiler:

**deathholydeath**

Two fish are in a tank. One fish looks at the other fish and says, "Do you know how to drive this thing?"

**Cheesecat**

Spoilered might be too offensive, view at your own discretion.

Spoiler:

**CthuluIsSpy**

I will kill this thread. Super offensive.

Spoiler:

**Jihadin**

"HEY WE HAVE INSURGENTS IN THE MUDHOUSE!"
"Wait One"
............
"Spartan 3 this is 4. We talking the mudhouse on the right with the left window shutter busted?"
"4 this is 3. Good Copy. Want me to smoke for identification?"
"3 we be 4. No need. We're putting one through the door. Gunner has eyes on AK sticking out the right window."
BOOM
"2 we be 4. Did we have one go out the back?"
"Spartan 4 this is 2. Good shoot. One out the back was negative upright"

Stryker MGS is Spartan 4.....as soon below