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Well, it is a social hobby so being a decent person with your opponent is key.
Even better when you can find common things to laugh about.
I find playing a competitive game I like a close nail biter match: either side being tabled is a waste of time for both parties.
The Conan quote: "To crush your enemies, to see them driven before you, and to hear the lamentations of their women." is for that special player that needs to find an appropriate outlet for their martial leanings not in the realm of a hobby.

 vipoid wrote:
Nor, for that matter, do I see the fun in a game where 2/3 of my weapons are utterly worthless.

That would be the more detailed version of a fun game: "when I get to use my stuff".
I remember reading a "goatboy" article a long time ago (here: http://www.belloflostsouls.net/2012/11/goatboy-40k-mondays-questions-on-making-things-fun.html).
I think it is not quite enough for each side to be scraping off models but the joy of seeing things happening effectively.
Meaningful movement, shooting, assault and psychic phase.
Something needs to be happening at every turn or the game sucks.
Being able to run five models can be fun but the opponent only gets to kill five models...