Switch Theme:

Slime's Attack Squig  [RSS] Share on facebook Share on Twitter Submit to Reddit
»
Author Message
Advert


Forum adverts like this one are shown to any user who is not logged in. Join us by filling out a tiny 3 field form and you will get your own, free, dakka user account which gives a good range of benefits to you:
  • No adverts like this in the forums anymore.
  • Times and dates in your local timezone.
  • Full tracking of what you have read so you can skip to your first unread post, easily see what has changed since you last logged in, and easily see what is new at a glance.
  • Email notifications for threads you want to watch closely.
  • Being a part of the oldest wargaming community on the net.
If you are already a member then feel free to login now.




Made in us
Ancient Ultramarine Venerable Dreadnought






Illinois

Names of Characters
Slimefart Gitsmaka
Mad Dok Grotsnik
Painboy Kinstorg
Grotsnik's team of scientists
Grukk Face-Rippa
Kaptin Badrukk

[Battlefield]
(Slime is looking for treasures left behind and he finds a Genestealer head)
SLIME: Hmm...an 'ead? A perfect decorashun for me bosspole!
(He puts it in a bag jangling with stuff)

Later...

[Library on Space Hulk]
(the only ork in the library is Slime. He is reading a book called "How to beat Hive Fleet Whupass" and his bag starts moving)
SLIME: 'ello? (sees bag) I don' recall puttin' anyfing live in 'ere...
(the bag is opened and the Genestealer head bites deep into his neck)
SLIME:WAAAAAAAAAAAGH!!!!! HELP ME!!!!!! GET DIS FING OFFA ME NECK!!!!!
(After 10 minutes of running around trying to pull the head off, the head is ripped off and put in a cage. Slime has a very deep wound on the left side of his neck)

[Grotsnik's office]
GROTSNIK: By Gork an' Mork, Boss Fart, I mus be dreamin'.
SLIME: I assure you dat yeh are not, Dok. (holds up cage with head in it) Dis 'ead bit me on da neck.
GROTSNIK: I can see dat. Well, come along to da seriouz woundz unit, I can take a betta look dere.

[Serious Wounds unit]
(a painboy is tending to medical tools)
KINSTORG: What can I do fer ya, Dok?
GROTSNIK: You can get outta me way and let me work.
(Kinstorg leaves)
GROTSNIK: My-oh-my, Boss Fart, dis iz a bery deep wound. It almost reached yer spinal cord. What in the name of Gork were you doing?
SLIME: I was readin' a book, me bag started movin', I open da bag and da 'ead I got from da battlefield bites into me neck.
GROTSNIK: I'll admit yeh. I need to study da 'ead. KINSTORG!
(Kinstorg comes back in)
GROTSNIK: Put some bandages on dis wound. It's verra deep, so be verra careful. Oh, and Slime? Do you need anyone wiv ya? Besidez Kinstorg, that is.
SLIME: Call up Kaptin Badrukk and Boss Grukk.
GROTSNIK: (hits com panel) Paindeck to Grukk and Badrukk. Please report to the seriouz woundz unit on da paindeck, room 1. And don' take da shorecut. I've had ta treat 6 daemon-inflicted woundz today.
GRUKK[OC]: Whatever, Grotsnik.
BADRUKK[OC]: On my way.
(Kinstorg begins putting dressings on Slime's wound)
GROTSNIK: Just hit da com panel if ya needz me, Kinstorg.
KINSTORG: Yes, Dok.
GROTSNIK: I'll have to study dis 'ead so I know how ta treat yer wound, Boss Fart.
(knock at the door)
KINSTORG: Come in!
(Grukk and Badrukk come in)
GROTSNIK: Keep 'im awake. I don' know what's gonna happen if he lozez consciousness.
KINSTORG: Aye Aye Dok!
BADRUKK: Yes, Dok.
GRUKK: Yeah, alright.
SLIME: Grukk, keep yer temper in check. I'm in no condition to put up a fight.

[Science Lab]
(Grotsnik comes in with the cage)
GROTSNIK: Boyz! Get yer moon-suitz on! We needz ta analyze dis 'ead.
(A few minutes later, the boyz have their moon suits on)
GROTSNIK: Analyze dis 'ead. Take some blood samplez, saliva samplez, any samplez you can think of. We'll reconvene in an 'our. Am I clear?
(Silence)
GROTSNIK: Begin.
(Painboyz start working, the head snapping and biting as much as it can)

[Serious Wounds Unit]
GRUKK: So yeh were bit.
SLIME: Yeah.
BADRUKK: By an 'ead.
SLIME: A genestealer 'ead, to be clear.
GRUKK: Me squig's sick. Won' eat or attack.
BADRUKK: Strange, my gitfinda squigz are also sick. They can' see. And they won' eat.
SLIME: I don't 'ave a squig yet. Kinstorg?
KINSTORG: Yes Boss Fart?
SLIME: Have you seen any sick squigz lately?
KINSTORG: You'll hav ta axe Illyeh. I don' see squigz.

[Science Lab]
GROTSNIK: Are we done?
ALL BOYZ: Yep!
GROTSNIK: Forward da resultz to my office komputa, I'll study them to get an idea on how to heal Boss Fart.
PAINBOY: Done.
GROTSNIK: And someone investigate da sick squigz!

That is all for now. Will be updated later.

INSANE army lists still available!!!! Now being written in 8th edition format! I have Index Imperium 1, Index Imperium 2, Index Xenos 2, Codex Orks Codex Tyranids, Codex Blood Angels and Codex Space Marines!
PM me for an INSANE (100K+ points) if you desire.
 
   
Made in us
Ancient Ultramarine Venerable Dreadnought






Illinois

[Serious Wounds Unit]
(Grotsnik comes in)
GROTSNIK: Kinstorg, yer relieved.
KINSTORG: Okay, Dok.
(Kinstorg leaves)
GROTSNIK: Badrukk, Grukk, I've got someone inveztigating da sick squigz. Slime, I needz ta look at da results, but Painboy Frezone says dat he finks what bit yeh iz a new speciez of attack squig. But first, I needz ta change yer bandagez.
GRUKK: Allow me, Grotsnik.
GROTSNIK: Grukk, if yeh're gonna be an idiot, den ya can leaf. Dis is a verra seriouz wound.
GRUKK: (tenses up, then releases the tension) Whatever.
(Grukk leaves)
BADRUKK: He'z been like dis all day. Not sure wat's gotten inta 'im.
SLIME: Could I join dis conversashun?
GROTSNIK: What ya need ta do, Boss Fart, iz relax an' don' talk. Badrukk, step outside fer a few minutez while I change da bandagez.
BADRUKK: All right.
(Badrukk steps outside)
GROTSNIK: Before I change da bandagez, did Kinstorg do well while I waz gone?
SLIME: He changed da bandagez 'unce or twice. It'z still bleedin' profuzely.
GROTSNIK: (to himself) And I waz on'y gone fer two hourz...
SLIME: Dok?
GROTSNIK: Talkin' to myself, Boss Fart.
(comm beep. Grotsnik hits the com panel)
{NOTE: Grotsnik is applying dressings to Slime's wound while he is talking}
GROTSNIK: Yez?
KINSTORG: Dere's bin annuver daemon attack. I've got 2 nobz 'ere with seriouz woundz.
GROTSNIK: 'ave Painboys Jimmbio an' Illya 'andle it 'till I get dere.
KINSTORG: It'z seriouz. One ov 'em may needz a Cybork body.
GROTSNIK: I'm almos' done 'ere. I'll be dere in a minnit.
KINSTORG: All right.
SLIME: Yeh'd betta get down dere, Dok. It soundz seriouz.
GROTSNIK: I'm done anyway. Hit da com panel if ya need me. An' I'll look at da data gathered soon. Just try the stay awake. We can' have annuver dead boss on our 'ands.
SLIME: I'll try.
GROTSNIK: I'll be back.
(Grotsnik leaves and Badrukk comes back in)
SLIME: So, Kaptin. Tell me about yer relashunship wiv Abbadon da Despolier.

More to come!


INSANE army lists still available!!!! Now being written in 8th edition format! I have Index Imperium 1, Index Imperium 2, Index Xenos 2, Codex Orks Codex Tyranids, Codex Blood Angels and Codex Space Marines!
PM me for an INSANE (100K+ points) if you desire.
 
   
Made in us
Ancient Ultramarine Venerable Dreadnought






Illinois

After Grotsnik has taken care of the daemon-inflicted wounds...

[Grotsnik's office]
(Grotsnik is looking at his computer screen, and is muttering to himself)
GROTSNIK: Squig...positive? Let'z run da resultz again.
(Same results. Computer says 'New Speciez of Attack Squig discovered'.)
GROTSNIK: (hits com panel) KINSTORG! How's Boss Fart?
KINSTORG[OC]: I've jus' replaced da bandagez. Still bleedin' profusely.
GROTSNIK: Take 'im to da Surgery Ward. I'm givin' 'im a parshul cybork. I'll be dere in five minnitz.
KINSTORG[OC]: Yes, Dok.

[Surgery Ward]
(the room is grey, and has more advanced medical equipment. Grotsnik walks in)
GROTSNIK: Kinstorg, you'll moniter his vital signz. Badrukk, you'll provide da toolz.
SLIME: Wot about me?
GROTSNIK: We're givin' yeh a parshul cybork neck. Yeh should servive.
SLIME: Awright.
GROTSNIK: Allright, everyone. Dis procedure can be verra dangerouz, but I 'ave full confidense dat Boss Fart will servive. Kinstorg, apply da sleep gas.
(Slime falls asleep)
GROTSNIK: I'll remove da bandagez.

The ending is still being planned, stay tuned!

INSANE army lists still available!!!! Now being written in 8th edition format! I have Index Imperium 1, Index Imperium 2, Index Xenos 2, Codex Orks Codex Tyranids, Codex Blood Angels and Codex Space Marines!
PM me for an INSANE (100K+ points) if you desire.
 
   
Made in us
Ancient Ultramarine Venerable Dreadnought






Illinois

[Surgery ward]
GROTSNIK: (removes bandages) Kinstorg! Vital Signz?
KINSTORG: Low but wivvin acceptable parameterz, Dok.
BADRUKK: Wot do ya needz, Dok?
GROTSNIK: Hand me da cybork bug. It lookz like a green jewel.
(Badrukk fumbles around for it, and finally gets it. Grotsnik applies it to the neck wound. Almost immediately, metal tendrils start growing)
GROTSNIK: Nothin' ta worry abou'. It growz da cybork neck.
KINSTORG: Spore Prezzure, 98/63. Pulse, 45bpm. Body Temp, 97.2.
(The cybork neck has finished growing)
GROTSNIK: Reverse sleep gaz!
(Slime wakes up)
BADRUKK: Boss Fart, can yeh hear me?
SLIME: (yawns) Kaptin!
GROTSNIK: I gave yeh a cybork neck. We're moving yeh to da recovery ward soon. Yeh'll be laid up fer abou' a week. Da 'ead yeh found is a new speciez of attack squig. Since yeh were da first ork ta discover it, why not name it?
SLIME: I will name it. But not now.
(Grukk walks in, his squig trailing behind him)
GRUKK: Alright, Grotsnik! My squig'z betta now. Apparently it waz a viruz only 1 in 1000 squigz are immune ta.
SLIME: Hey, Grukk.
GRUKK: How are yeh, Slime?
SLIME: Betta now.
GRUKK: I'm happy right now. (squig bites Badrukk) DATZ A NASTY SQUIG!
GROTSNIK: (inspects Badrukk's bite) It's pretty shallow. Nothing I can't handle.
BADRUKK: Do I get a cybork too?
GROTSNIK: Nope! Just replace banadgez every 6 hourz till healed.
BADRUKK: Aye, Aye, Dok Grotsnik.
(Slime is moved to the recovery ward.)

THE END!

Hope you enjoyed.

INSANE army lists still available!!!! Now being written in 8th edition format! I have Index Imperium 1, Index Imperium 2, Index Xenos 2, Codex Orks Codex Tyranids, Codex Blood Angels and Codex Space Marines!
PM me for an INSANE (100K+ points) if you desire.
 
   
 
Forum Index » Dakka Fiction
Go to: