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Great question, here's my advice:

In terms of being able to find a game and an active community GW games are often the best way to go. You are right to be warry of the expense but there are ways to mitigate that.

1) Kill Team: All you need are two squads and the rule book and some home made terrain and off you go.
2) Other GW skirmish game: Lots options here both in the 40K setting and Age of Sigmar.

GW's skirmish games are cheaper (relativley) to buy into, don't suffer the same kind of Meta chasing that full 40K gets stuck in and its a way to slowly build up a faction over time. My friends and I play Necromunda and really enjoy it.

They also play quick, which as a fellow dad I can appreciate as my gaming time tend to be limited.

I don't play the other two games so can't speak to rules orcommunity. From what I've seen both games have a range of models and if your a fan of Star Wars or super hero's both could be fun to play.

There are lots of rule systems out there to try. If GW rules bloat is a turn off try One Page Rules. If other periods or setting strike you fancy Osprey publishes a war games rules serries that touches on some intresting subjets with each book being about $25 USD a pop. I play a variety of their rule sets with my kid (age 12) and we have a blast.