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Springfield, IL., Just Gave The Key To The City To Cobra Commander
No. Really.
In a decision that can't possibly have any negative repercussions for the city's helpless residents, Springfield, Illinois mayor J. Michael Houston has given the key to the city to noted terrorist leader and snake enthusiast Cobra Commander. Ostensibly this was done as a promotion for the upcoming JoeCon, the G.I. Joe collector's convention which will be held in Springfield April 9th through 12th, but I think we all know Cobra Commander is plotting something.
Joe fans likely remember that Springfield housed a secret Cobra base in the original cartoon, seen in the memorable and quite scarring two-part first season finale "There's No Place Like Springfield," and has been popping up in G.I.Joe lore ever since. In the original episodes, Cobra filled the entire town with secret agents in disguised, and used the innocent-looking town to try and trick Shipwreck into believing he wasn't a member of G.I. Joe but a normal family man. And then they tried to mentally traumatize him by forcing him to watch his "wife" and "children" literally melt before his eyes in a house fire. It was messed up, man.
I fully expect some actual residents of Springfield to likewise melt before the convention ends. Sorry, folks. You have no one to blame but your mayor.
Awkward photo ops # 23
The poor man really has a stake in the country. The rich man hasn't; he can go away to New Guinea in a yacht. The poor have sometimes objected to being governed badly; the rich have always objected to being governed at all
We love our superheroes because they refuse to give up on us. We can analyze them out of existence, kill them, ban them, mock them, and still they return, patiently reminding us of who we are and what we wish we could be.
"the play's the thing wherein I'll catch the conscience of the king,
Everyone, relax. Anyone who is educated on these things knows that Cobra's plans may be going great from Monday through Thursday, but they always, always fall apart by Friday afternoon.
Emperor's Eagles (undergoing Chapter reorganization)
Caledonian 95th (undergoing regimental reorganization)
Thousands Sons (undergoing Warband re--- wait, are any of my 40K armies playable?)
This is what happens if you don't re-elect Mayor Quimby .
The poor man really has a stake in the country. The rich man hasn't; he can go away to New Guinea in a yacht. The poor have sometimes objected to being governed badly; the rich have always objected to being governed at all
We love our superheroes because they refuse to give up on us. We can analyze them out of existence, kill them, ban them, mock them, and still they return, patiently reminding us of who we are and what we wish we could be.
"the play's the thing wherein I'll catch the conscience of the king,
Well I'm sure Cobra is a great job creator. He was probably getting a sweet tax deal by moving his organization to Springfield. It's the same as having a military base in the town, they're just all around great for the economy.
Shoot, I live in Illinois. Out of the 178 state level politicians in Springfield, so Cobra Commander if you made a Most Evil Leaders in Springfield list, Cobra Commander wouldn't even break the top 100.
Proud Member of the Infidels of OIF/OEF
No longer defending the US Military or US Gov't. Just going to ""**feed into your fears**"" with Duffel Blog Did not fight my way up on top the food chain to become a Vegan...
Warning: Stupid Allergy
Once you pull the pin, Mr. Grenade is no longer your friend
DE 6700
Harlequin 2500
RIP Muhammad Ali.
Jihadin, Scorched Earth 791. Leader of the Pork Eating Crusader. Alpha
Jimsolo wrote: Shoot, I live in Illinois. Out of the 178 state level politicians in Springfield, so Cobra Commander if you made a Most Evil Leaders in Springfield list, Cobra Commander wouldn't even break the top 100.
Just what I was thinking. It's a well known fact that IL politicians all greet each other in public by leaning in and loudly whispering "Hail Hydra!"
I like to think that event is generally preceded by a running swordfight through city hall.
This seems less awesome, but it could get better if the whole town could be subjected to a mass marketing campaign, only to be saved by G.I. Joe cosplayers.
Klawz-Ramming is a subset of citrus fruit?
Gwar- "And everyone wants a bigger Spleen!"
Mercurial wrote:
I admire your aplomb and instate you as Baron of the Seas and Lord Marshall of Privateers.
Orkeosaurus wrote:Star Trek also said we'd have X-Wings by now. We all see how that prediction turned out.
Orkeosaurus, on homophobia, the nature of homosexuality, and the greatness of George Takei.
English doesn't borrow from other languages. It follows them down dark alleyways and mugs them for loose grammar.
My Python would love some care and attention from such lovely troops!
"Your mumblings are awakening the sleeping Dragon, be wary when meddling the affairs of Dragons, for thou art tasty and go good with either ketchup or chocolate. "
Dragons fear nothing, if it acts up, we breath magic fire that turns them into marshmallow peeps. We leaguers only cry rivets!
Emperor's Eagles (undergoing Chapter reorganization)
Caledonian 95th (undergoing regimental reorganization)
Thousands Sons (undergoing Warband re--- wait, are any of my 40K armies playable?) 
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