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I might suggest using one of the boardgames as an introduction to the game and the world. The games are relatively quick, and it will introduce her to some of the concepts of the games like how to-wound rolls work.

I am in the camp of those saying this is a bad idea. If you have a significant other who supports your hobbies (whatever they may be), then that is already the most one can ask for. My wife bought me a Necron army piecemeal over the last three years, but she would not play the game. I bought her a sowing machine and tagged along to some fabric stores when we were out, but that doesn't mean I am going to get into sowing, quilt making, etc. In the long run, it is much better and healthier for a relationship to recognize each other's differences and appreciate them, then to try and make each other into the same person, despite your undoubtedly well intentions. Just some friendly advice.

My girlfriend really likes arts and crafts, so getting her interested in painting and modelling wasn't too hard. However she isn't that patient and has trouble with the rules, so games are a pain.

My advice would be to start her off with painting and modelling so that she'll eventually have a full army. Then play small games with her that are relatively short but interesting.

Best of luck

As her for a game any time you want to play.

Pretty much the best advice I can offer.

I'd say don't start with 40k... Way too many abstract rules from way too many sources, and leans towards a big initial investment of cost of models and time to assemble and paint said models.

Instead, go for one of the board games to gauge interest in the setting and the basics of tabletop gaming. Execution Force could be a good one, since it's co-operative. Space Hulk, Deathwatch: Overkill and Betrayal at Calth if you want to try a competitive board game. And if they don't take a liking to it, at least you've got some cool mini's to use in your own armies.

I agree with other with trying a boardgame with her first. I think a cooperative boardgame would be better but make sure your letting her make decisions for her models.

I recently got my fiancee to give it a try after a few months of asking her every once in a while if she'd like to play, and at first she was just staring at stuff like "what the hell is this and what am I doing?" However, she did start getting more into it once we got through the first two turns. Didn't finish the game, but she did enjoy herself during that time and it looks like I could get her to try it again. However my first question might be, how does she react to you talking about the game and the lore itself and such? That mIght tell you a lot right away about how she'd react to playing or trying it out, as if she can't even latch onto hearing about the game or find anything interesting in what is actually being simulated in the game then you might not have much luck. I was lucky where my fiancee liked hearing about the lore and parts of the game and would actually inquire about things I was talking about so that I might explain it further. Basically you need to see if the base concept even gets to where it can grow in her garden of interests into more than just a stump that can't grow beyond that point.

If you actually do get her to try a game, I would honestly try something like the initial turn by turn introduction setup that the dark vengeance set has you do. Things are deployed so close together that stuff starts happening right away and it is easier to see what can happen in different parts of the game. Yes you're going to be throwing a lot of sophisticated rules and parts of the actual game out the window (like not every using the psychic phase for the librarian), but if she is going to try to play, I've found it's best to do it in steps rather than throwing all of the rules out at once.

I've been teaching a few friends how to play based on how much I know and understand, and there are still rules we have yet to implement just because we're trying to make sure we actually know the basics and what stuff does thus far. When my friends saw the size of the rulebook, I can tell you already they were almost ready to give it up, but the simplicity of the dark vengeance introduction game helped ease them in.

Basically if you do get her to maybe try it, start with the KISS school of 40k and move up from there. If there start being too many rules, then you might just have to play a watered down version with her rather than what you might play with others.

Huron black heart wrote:
I have tried to get my wife to play a couple of times but she is simply not interested, if she ever did relent and play a game I know it would be because I have pestered here to do so and I don't want that to be the case.
Zombicide as mentioned above is slightly more approachable and this is something she has played (still a bit reluctantly tbh)
I'll stick to keeping the hobby to myself indoors.

Zombicide has been mentioned a few times, so I think that might be worth looking into.



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 EnTyme wrote:
I might suggest using one of the boardgames as an introduction to the game and the world. The games are relatively quick, and it will introduce her to some of the concepts of the games like how to-wound rolls work.

I'm unfamiliar with the board games? Could you please list them?
(Edit) Nevermind, I see somebody posted some of them a few posts down.

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 Grumblewartz wrote:
I am in the camp of those saying this is a bad idea. If you have a significant other who supports your hobbies (whatever they may be), then that is already the most one can ask for. My wife bought me a Necron army piecemeal over the last three years, but she would not play the game. I bought her a sowing machine and tagged along to some fabric stores when we were out, but that doesn't mean I am going to get into sowing, quilt making, etc. In the long run, it is much better and healthier for a relationship to recognize each other's differences and appreciate them, then to try and make each other into the same person, despite your undoubtedly well intentions. Just some friendly advice.

This is sound advice, thanks for sharing
The reason why I am trying to introduce her to my hobby is not to create the same person with the same interests. It is more because she does not have a hobby (like sowing) like how your wife does. So, I am trying to introduce her to mine. She may hate it, that's okay. I don't expect she will be as crazy about it as I am, even if she decides she loves it, but I will never know if I dont try. All it really comes down to is spending time together.

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This post is almost disheartening. I'm almost positive that the lore is not something that will interest her, but there is always a chance.

Well if she's someone who plays games to just play them, then the lore might not be an issue, but if they're someone who needs to know the why of the game, then there might be that risk.

Part of the trouble I had with introducing the game to my friends is that once you tell them about or show them a 300 page rulebook, they tend to be intimidated, and even my fiancee was like "holy ****" when she saw the rulebook for the first time. If that is going to be something that intimidates her too much, then you might have an issue, unless you can find a way to explain the what and why in a simple matter to make much of the overwhelming nature of the rules go away. I do wish you luck, as sharing a hobby or even having it where your significant other doesn't just view your hobby as your thing you do on your time does help things overall in a relationship. Just that when it comes to this beast, it really is something that isn't for everyone just because of how complicated it can be. Even if you've been playing for years, you kinda need to put on the glasses of a new player and consider how much they need to look at and get used to in order to get started playing the game, hence why my friends and I have been adding rules as we feel comfortable rather than trying to play by the rules from the very start.

 Meatloafwarrior wrote:
If you're a female gamer, or you know one who enjoys the game. What is it about the game that most appeals to you/them? How can I best bring her into the fold?

Well, 40k having feth all in the way of female representation doesn't help. There are women who play the game in spite of that, but for most of us being a bald Astartes isn't exactly our idea of a power fantasy. On the other hand, the amount of Girl Power on the cover of Kauyon (where Shadowsun kicks the crap out of a poor Raven Guard) was easily Over 9000.

(My roommate's a huge Metroid fan, and she actually modeled her Shadowsun to look just like Samus.)

I personally got into the lore after browsing randomly into the 40k section on TVTropes. It described the Tau and I was like "holy gak, this is a thing???" A few hours of reading later, I actually took the grimdark seriously, and thought space marines seemed like terrifying villains. It wasn't until much, much later though, after I'd already gotten into modeling via Warmachine and had a windfall from selling some stuff, that I started to seriously consider playing the game.

In my case, though, I was primed for it by being fannish / into nerd stuff already, including the miniatures hobby. For someone else ... you might want to consider the following.

* Don't bring out the rulebook. Or if you have to, use the small-format one from the 2-player sets, just so that it looks less intimidating.

* Help her pick out models she likes. Narrow it down to a faction maybe, and then just let her browse. This is how I found out my partner likes Destroyers and Canoptek models. Getting a copy of Warhammer Visions can help, since it's sort of catalog-like.

* Know which factions have female models and characters. Right now that's like Sisters of Battle, Harlequins, Assassinorum, Dark Eldar, and Tau, and maybe a handful of Craftworld Eldar also. It's up to her whether Tyranids, Daemons, AdMech, and Imperial Knights count or not. This may not be a factor with her, but let's face it; most of you guys wouldn't be here if the Astartes were an all-girls club. (And Games Workshop sold its kits through fabric and scrapbooking stores.)

* Forge the fething narrative. Idk if she's really competitive or not, but it can be intimidating for any newb to get tabled on turn one, let alone one who's the only girl in the room. (This is why the handful of competitive women gamers tend to be hardcore, like the one in my last games store's Warmahordes scene who had the Skorne emblem tattooed on her arm. They're the only ones who get past this.) So if she's not that excited about claiming objectives, try making it more of a social thing, where you roll the dice to see what happens to the characters. Have them start talking in character, even; everyone thinks it's hilarious when I have my drones talk like the Portal turrets, for some reason.

* Keep the model count low. Maybe not, if she's wowed by apocalypse battle reports (like my ex) or would really rather play Kroot or another horde army (also like my ex). But this is one reason Kill Team games are a good start, and also a reason to focus the action on small groups of elite units. You can also limit complexity by keeping out vehicles for starters, or even the entire assault phase (unless she's playing a list that depends on it).

* Keep the number of special rules low, and easy to remember. In the case of the aforementioned ex, they mostly just needed to know that Kroot had Move Through Cover and Stealth (Forests).

* Make sure it's a fight she can win. The last game I tried to run with my current partner fizzled out, because I had a Piranha wing up against a Destroyer Cult and that turned out to be an unfair matchup. (I've only been playing for like a year, okay?)

Oh yeah, the board game idea is good too if she likes the board games. I also suggest Miniwargaming.com's battle reports over Frontline's, as they're much more entertaining and professionally made, although (speaking from experience) if she doesn't know what they're rolling dice for or what "three up" means she's going to have a bad time.

The best battle reports that I know of are Wargamergirl's on Youtube. Miranda explains everything she and her opponent are doing, and overlays damage grids on the screen so that you can track warjack systems and stuff. She basically only plays Warmahordes, but hey, that's what I played first. The $50 USD starters are priced just right, and the rules make sense if you've played D&D-style RPGs. (Malifaux is another good bet for an introductory miniatures game.)

Er, sorry for rambling, good luck and stuff. >_>b


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Oh yeah,

* Respect the headcanon. There was a thing I read earlier that said guys are more into acquisitive fandom (Collect All The Things, Know All The Trivia) while girls are more into creative fandom (Write All The Fanfic, Ship All The Characters). And it speculated that the reason for this, besides women having less disposable income, was that most media assumes a male audience, so it leaves out stuff that female viewers / readers / players consider obvious or important. Which means that if they want to see it, they have to make it themselves.

So if she starts asking what seem like weird questions, or insisting that her models / faction work different from normal ("Well, my Space Marines include women.") then don't discourage her, unless you'd rather that she didn't play at all.