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Recently I when to a tournament in which a Parent of my opponent was being rude during the match I was playing against his Son, I did my best to blow him off and focus on the game, but he was quite rude the whole day. Later that day, I had a few folks come up to me and tell me that he is know for doing things of that nature, some even say that he does it just to try and break the focus of the player to give his son a edge on the player. To be honest, it got so bad, I have thought on more then one account of quitting the game as it really ruined playing at that location for me. How would you have dealt with a persons like that? Do you feel as if there should be rules against non player interaction in the match?

During the game, it's probably best to just ask them politely but firmly to let you and your opponent play your game without interference.

If there is an ongoing issue, talk to them respectfully about it away from the table.

Alastergrimm wrote:Recently I when to a tournament in which a Parent of my opponent was being rude...

Thats unfortunate, I have seen that as well in several flavors: Parent, Best Friend, Girlfriend, Hobby Club Know it all, Friend whose Round is over, etc.

Alastergrimm wrote:How would you have dealt with a persons like that?

I tell the onlookers, "you're not playing this game", and if necesary, "move along" or "don't interupt".

Alastergrimm wrote:Do you feel as if there should be rules against non player interaction in the match?

Should there be rules? I guess so, but I think you should expect to defend yourself when necessary, be civil first, be firm second and be hostile if you have to.

Unfortunately some hangars on type people need a 'get the hell out of here' to get it.

EDIT: A parent? That would be a tough one, to give a 'go away' to, but I'd do it. Just another reason not to have kids in tourneys etc. irritating.

I don't play tournaments, but I like to watch. Aside from the occasional "ooh, ahh, wow, crap" expressions I keep my mouth shut and stay out of the way. Is that interfering with the game?

Alastergrimm wrote: Do you feel as if there should be rules against non player interaction in the match?

Most places I've played have an informal rule that people other than the two players are not allowed to interfere; give reminders to one player, or make comments that help or hinder either. Most of the time there's no need for it to be a formal rule; though I've see it occasionally.

Zip- I wouldn't have a problem with that at all, but when people are going out of their way to detract ya, that is what get under my skin, Comments like "Your army is *@&!, or Why not just pack up and leave, your not worth a &@!*." That is the type of crap that he pulls all of the time."


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on quite a few different players.

If you've tried talking to him adult to adult and it hasn't worked, your next best bet is to calmly report the incidents to the store owner or manager and advise him that this person is being rude to his customers, and possibly driving some away.

Alastergrimm wrote:Zip- I wouldn't have a problem with that at all, but when people are going out of their way to detract ya, that is what get under my skin, Comments like "Your army is *@&!, or Why not just pack up and leave, your not worth a &@!*." That is the type of crap that he pulls all of the time."

Is that what he actually says?

You should tell him off, man. Seriously. You don't have to go crazy, but definitely telling him that he's out of line and needs to go away or pipe down wouldn't be out of the question.

How old is the child with the parent? If I am a parent, I am for damn sure going to supervise the interactions older adults have with my children.

I would also like to hear an example of 'rude'. If the child is young, he could be attempting to coach the child which is probably reasonable depending on the age. Now that may be annoying for a tourney, but at some point stores will let customers participate in tourneys. So what is super serious business for you a store owner sees a reasonable expectation letting a young child participate in an event with supervision and help from his dad.

Now if he really is cursing in front of his child and telling people to pack up and quit, I would tell the TO to throw him out or refund my money. I do not interact with negligent parents abusing their own children. Sometimes if the owners won't handle things, you just gotta leave and influence change with your wallet and feet.

The kid was 17. So ya, not a matter of small children.

What is a 17 year old doing with his daddy over his shoulder? Sounds like the Dad should get his own army and play in the tourney too?

That is... odd.

Well 17 is certainly old enough to not need an adult standing there supervising...and especially not standing there giving you a hard time. If he had a problem with you he should have manned up and talked to you in private, rather than in a very public place in the middle of a tournament. And nkelsch...if a parent needs to be there to supervise the interactions that the "child" (17?) has with an adult, then that child should play in a junior league tournament...which our local store provides. If you play with adults, then you should be ready for adult interaction. If you need parental supervision, then quit playing with adult strangers!

In addition, the original poster said that the dad frequently did this sort of thing, during TOURNAMENTS...so it sounds to me like its not a supervision issue, and more of an issue of a guy being an a$$. In my opinion, if you're not a judge or a player, get the "f" out of the tournament area.

And if I was the player...and some guy was messing with me, I'd ask him can it wait, and I'd tell him if it can't wait I have no problem calling a 5 minute timeout and talking to him outside. Then we'd take care of the situation one way or the other.

OP...what has the store owner / TO said? Because if you go from being verbally abused in a tournament to thinking about quitting the game to the internet with no intermediary steps, there is a serious malfunction in your process.

at this point it's the owner/manager's responsibility to resolve the situation diplomaticly if possibly

The store owner/TO has said nothing to stop this parent from disrupting the tourney. The parent came into the store ranting and raving about a previous tourney's results (which he did not play in, btw... it was a game that his son played in....again). I watched her listening to this guy's rants and she never told him that he was out of line or that it no longer mattered because it was a previous tourney. I think this got him rolling on the jeering attitude. Then, when he started to interrupt the tourney flow at the table Alaster was at, she didn't pay any mind then either during the tourney(and neither did the main judge, for that matter...).
The main judge did eventually mention to the parent that his behavior was innapropriate later (we don't know if it was through his own initiative or at the store owner's request) but it needed to be stopped as the game was in progress, not a few hours later.
I honestly wonder if the TO didn't say anything to the parent because the dad is a "big spender" at the store and she doesn't want to lose customers. The problem is, if his behavior stays as consistent as it is without enough correction to make him stop, they may lose more customers (and I am not talking about just us because this parent has done this before to others).

My steps to this problem, which I have dealt with.

1. I ask the person to not interfere with the game in a calm, collected manner.
2. If he persists I immediately halt the game and notify the T.O. of the issue and have him resolve it before I continue the match.

The T.O. is there for these types of situations. It is not my responsibility as a player to police the actions of other players/hangers on past the initial polite request to refrain from interference.

Directly calling people on their behavior is the best course, in my experience. Douches like this thrive on people being too passive agressive to stop them from this assclownery.

To add another thought, Alaster did tell him to back off during the game, which he only did after Alaster got forceful and more demanding...

I know that when I played in the girls' tournament there, there was actually a rule in place that the boyfriends/spouse/significant other was not allowed to help (by any means- giving advise or reminding of rules...etc.) their sig. other during the game. It really helped us to develop our own sense of tactics. I think this type of idea needs to be in place for all tournaments- except it is simply "if you are not playing... keep your nose out of the game" (unless you are just watching).

In regards to Dashofpepper comment, I have only been playing the game for less then a year, It was just a big turn off to Tournament play for someone who is still somewhat fresh to the game, that is all that I am saying.

Some stores are struggling to stay afloat. So when the big spenders wanna throw their weight around, you know the store owner is unlikely to say anything. Money drives everything, unfortunately.


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But that's why I don't turn to the store owner/TO. If they want to step up and say something, fine. But I don't need them to...because I'LL say something before they get a chance to walk over.

The worst I've seen in my local FLGS is that someone was complaining about Wound Allocation, and well... he wouldn't stop. Well the player stopped and informed the player, if he didn't stop calling him a cheater for doing nothing wrong, he'd kindly go outside and kick his teeth in.

Well later on the player kept saying stuff, and the other players sorta in unison yelled at him to shut the up already.

But over here it's a small gaming circle. We usually get 20 people at most. On an average 12, so we know everybody, so if there's bad blood more than likely each fight is going to be one sided.

Alastergrimm wrote:Recently I when to a tournament in which a Parent of my opponent was being rude during the match I was playing against his Son, I did my best to blow him off and focus on the game, but he was quite rude the whole day. Later that day, I had a few folks come up to me and tell me that he is know for doing things of that nature, some even say that he does it just to try and break the focus of the player to give his son a edge on the player. To be honest, it got so bad, I have thought on more then one account of quitting the game as it really ruined playing at that location for me. How would you have dealt with a persons like that? Do you feel as if there should be rules against non player interaction in the match?

Personally, I would ask the person politely to stop interfering in the match or that I would call the Judge / TO over and declare that my opponent is cheating buy having somebody interfering in the match verbally. You do this enough time to the parent and they might get it that you do not want to hear them. Just imagine what will happen if all of the other players start doing this as well. It would humiliate both the player and the parent. probably enough to the point that s/he will tell the adult to please stop talking themselves so that they won't have the judge / TO called over. This also covers the store owners back because its not the owner telling them something but the players telling them that what they are doing is wrong.