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Hi guys, as you can see this is my first post; I used to collect when I was a nipper and I'm thinking about returning to the hobby, although I'm not quite sure what my girlfriend will think, hence the username. Anyway, I thought that if I did start collecting I should try and be creative as possible and create my own SM chapter. I just really want a bit of feedback really, mainly whether all my fluff fits in with the existing canon. I'm not really fussed if there are a few inconsistencies, but I would like to stay as true to the universe as possible.

So, here we go:

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The Orbus of Prandium
The Orbus of Prandium are a rogue descendant chapter of the Ultramarines, formed immediately after the destruction of Prandium at the hands of Hive Fleet Behemoth. The chapter is comprised of the surviving marines of the garrison stationed on Prandium. Shamed and angered by the destruction of their planet at the hands of the Hive Fleet, the garrison broke away from the orbiting Ultramarine fleet and disappeared into the warp. These actions were so contrary to the Ultramarines staunch and rigid discipline that the rogue company were stricken from the Chapter record and declared heretics. Unbeknown to the remaining Legions, the Orbus had sworn new oaths of Loyalty to the Emperor, pledging to absolve their failure by stemming the tide of xenos wherever they manifest. The Orbus are fiercly independent, refusing communication with any Imperial body or potential ally. They fight alone, fielding the same meagre equipment they used prior to their defeat on Prandium. This is their penance, and they bear it without grudge. Out of respect for their fallen brothers and the planet they swore to protect, the Orbus painted their armour black, although they still bear the heraldry of the Ultramarine chapter perhaps as a sign of their true fealty to the Chapter.

Little is known of the current whereabouts of the Chapter, they appear from the warp without herald, always where the threat of xenos is imminent. From analyzing sightings of the chapter, the most learned of the Ultramarine scholars speculate that the Orbus are also searching for something, what they do not know.

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So that's it for the moment, I'd love some feedback and suggestions. Obviously there's a lot of room for more fluff, such as more detailed information about the chapter structure and the commanders of the legion. In terms of how this fluff would affect the rules and army selection, I imagine it as a vanilla ruleset, but with a fairly heavily reduced set of troops to choose from. They're meant to be fairly ill equipped, so they wouldn't have access to any technology created after the fall of Prandium (745 M41). I thought about some sort of battle rage rule that would affect discipline when fighting Tyranids, maybe give a close combat bonus at the expense of unit cohesion, although this I'm unsure about mainly because I'm unfamiliar with the newest rule set. Until I have a good understanding of the new mechanics, I don't think I'd be able to create a balanced rule set.

FYI, 'Orbus' is latin for 'orphaned', although I'm not sure if that's the right grammatical tense to use, anyone with a bit of linguistics knowledge confirm this? Does 'Prandium's Orbi' sound better?

As for chapter colours, this is what I imagined, with standard Ultramarine heraldry:

Sounds interesting, very legion of the damned.

Rather than them running off and then having and "unknown" oath to the Emp, you might want to just cut that back to them running off, and then coming back and embarking on a penitent crusade to clense their honour in the sight of the Emp, and then choosing not to associate with any other Imperial forces due to being so lowly etc.

Otherwise a reasonably interesting background, and I like the idea of a dark armour with the white omega symbol. I would not paint it black though, or all the detailing will be lost. Go for a dark grey, that way you can still add areas of shade.

Edit: Also like your user name, very cool

SilverMK2 wrote:Sounds interesting, very legion of the damned.

Rather than them running off and then having and "unknown" oath to the Emp, you might want to just cut that back to them running off, and then coming back and embarking on a penitent crusade to clense their honour in the sight of the Emp, and then choosing not to associate with any other Imperial forces due to being so lowly etc.

Otherwise a reasonably interesting background, and I like the idea of a dark armour with the white omega symbol. I would not paint it black though, or all the detailing will be lost. Go for a dark grey, that way you can still add areas of shade.

Edit: Also like your user name, very cool

Hey there, thanks for the speedy feedback.

I like your idea of returning to give their oaths. If I remember correctly another battle brother needs to Witness an Oath for it to be sound. Once I flesh out some leaders for the chapter I can construct a back story involving their oath giving.

As for the colour scheme, it was meant to be a similar black to the Black Templars, so with some careful washes and highlights I think I should be able to pick out the detail while still retaining the sombre 'mourning' look.

No worries, it sounded interesting.

Yeah, sorry, I can't see the image you added as my work filters block it out, so I had to go on your text account.

Here's a link to the Bolter and Chainsaw image if that helps. Orbus of Prandium colour scheme

I've fleshed out the Chapter Master role a little bit, as before any feedback or constructive criticism would be great. Oh yeah, no jokes about sleeping with mothers please.

Brother Oedipus
Brother Oedipus was a reclusiarch Chaplain stationed in the fortress monastry on Prandium. He was incredibly devout and held great sway over the marines station there. As well as his normal duties as a Chaplain, Brother Oedipus was responsible for training future Chaplains, and it was said his monastry produced the most staunch and fervent of all the Ultramarines Ecclesiarchy. When Hive Fleet Behemoth consumed Prandium, it was the Fortress Monastry that was last to fall, with Brother Oedipus leading the defense against the insurmountable horde of xenos. Unwilling the admit defeat, Brother Oedipus was dragged from the battlefield by his brothers onto the last thunderhawk leaving the planet, moments before bio-weapons were deployed to cleanse the planet of all life.

Brother Oedipus held himself personally responsible for the fall of Prandium; striken by grief and shame he gathered the remaining survivors of the monastry garrison and fled into the warp, creating the splinter chapter Orbus of Prandium shortly after. At the thought his verdant homeworld devoid of life, Brother Oedipus scratched his eyes out as penance for his failures, refusing any occular implants and instead putting his faith in the Emperor to 'illuminate his path through darkness'. Despite his blindness, Brother Oedipus will still lead the Orbus into battle, relying on his veteran combat abilities and his unshakeable faith in the Emperor to guide his judgement. He is accompanied by a retinue of four Chaplain initiates, who act as his eyes on the battlefield.

Some say that the intense grief felt by Brother Oedipus, combined with his immediate exposure to the warp as he fled Prandium gave Oedipus unknown psyker abilities, and it was only due to his unquestionable allegiance to the Emperor that saved him from being consumed by Chaos. As proof of his supernatural powers, Brother Oedipus' eye sockets bleed constantly, a wound no Apothecary can cure. It is rumoured that the bloody tears will only stop when the Orbus have been vindicated of their failures.

'Prandium's Orbi'
Something about that seems sinister to me
To hell with grammatical correctness

Oedipus... Is that referencing the dude who wished to overthrow his father in greek/roman mythology?

I quiet like the fact they're an offshoot of the SmurfMarines because GW would never do it to their favoured sons, somebody else had to (",)

Solly wrote:'Prandium's Orbi'
Something about that seems sinister to me
To hell with grammatical correctness

Oedipus... Is that referencing the dude who wished to overthrow his father in greek/roman mythology?

I quiet like the fact they're an offshoot of the SmurfMarines because GW would never do it to their favoured sons, somebody else had to (",)

Thanks for the feedback!

Yeah Oedipus was a a character in greek mythology (a particularly tragic story). He unknowingly kills his father and marries his mother; when he finds out what he's done he scratches his eyes out and exiles himself.

Oedipus on Wikipedia

It's a good name for the leader of the Chapter because it sets out straight away that it's a "tragic" legion
(for anyone with a knowledge of mythology that is)

Especially considering the lenghts that Oed goes through to "atone" for his sins,
it sets a sense of atonement before the rest of the back story is read.

Again, cool idea..