Bullet Proof Commissar

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**Mordoskul**

The Warboss crashed through the wall. trailing blood behind him. Stepping through the hole in the ceramite wall, Commissar General Steve descended upon the fallen Warboss with his own chainaxe. Gore showered the Commissar's gas mask and cap. Discarding the chainaxe, Steve lifted the Warboss's body and hurled it at the Ork Gargant in the distance, the Gargant's cockpit crumpled as the Warboss crashed through the Ork titan's head. The Gargant toppled onto an advancing horde of Ork Boyz. The surviving Boyz were mopped up by Promethean autogun fire. Another Gargant leveled it's cannon at Steve, with a sound like the very end of the world, a massive shell emerged from the gun, racing towards Steve at super-sonic speeds. Any ordinary man would be reduced to a fine red mist. But Steve is no ordinary man! Rising in the air, Steve kicked the massive shell with one pristinely polished jackboot, back at the Gargant.

Stupid umies', thought the Gargant driver, deh Kommizar iz so trickzy. But 'e won't survive, no 'umie cun survive me Big Gunz! It was his last thought as the shell he just fired slammed back into his cockpit, killing him instantly.

The Promethean 653rd charged into the breach, firing their autoguns and slashing away with their chainswords. All the while singing Promethean battle hyms. Explosions ripped through the trenches, creating geysers of blood and dirt. Ork corpses choked the narrow passages, and the Prometheans used their chainswords to clear a path through the carnage. Basilisk cannons fired overhead, ripping out chunks of enemy infantry. Promethean Kriegernaut tanks poured bolter shells and promethium into the trenches, blowing Orks apart, and setting the survivors ablaze. It was exhilarating.

Steve lept on top of a Deffcopta, avoiding the spinning blades, punched through the glass, and lifted the pilot up and out of the craft and tossed him aside. Steve climbed into the Deffcopta and set a colision course with an Ork Wartrukk. Leaping out at the last second, the Copta slammed into the Trukk, kiling all inside. Now on the ground, steve drew his power sword, Motivatus, and charged into battle against the unmotivated masses before him. Steve could not be stopped! "COWARDS FACE US IN BATTLE!" Steve screamed, "YOU CANNOT STAND AGAINST ME!" And it was so. The battle was over before it began. The day was saved thanks to Commissar Steve.

**BossBig'un**

ROFLPWN'D! Dakka Fiction in deed

Nice.

**wizard12**

Nicccccce. Also, may I ask if the regiments name if a ME reference? Unlikely but possible.

**Black Corsair**

JAJAJ great! ..... a sword called "motivatus"???? jeje something more for my guardsmen chainswords...

**Mordoskul**

wizard12 wrote:Nicccccce. Also, may I ask if the regiments name if a ME reference? Unlikely but possible.

What do you mean?

**BossBig'un**

Reminds me of that movie Big Daddy w/ Adam Sandler... "COMMISAR STEVE! DAMN YOU!"

**wizard12**

Mordoskul wrote:
wizard12 wrote:Nicccccce. Also, may I ask if the regiments name if a ME reference? Unlikely but possible.

What do you mean?

Ah, the Promethean's were an ancient race used as a major plot device in Mass Effect 1 & possibly 2 IIRC

Its still a good name for a regiment of guardsmen.

**Mordoskul**

Ah, thank you.

**Jaon**

wizard12 wrote:
Mordoskul wrote:
wizard12 wrote:Nicccccce. Also, may I ask if the regiments name if a ME reference? Unlikely but possible.

What do you mean?

Ah, the Promethean's were an ancient race used as a major plot device in Mass Effect 1 & possibly 2 IIRC

Its still a good name for a regiment of guardsmen.

Those were the protheans.

**Mordoskul**

It's good to have a cult following.

**Ediin**

I'm wondering who's more awesome:

Commissar Steve, or Commissar Fuklaw.

**Mordoskul**

Ediin wrote:I'm wondering who's more awesome:

Commissar Steve, or Commissar Fuklaw.

In all honesty, I've been pondering such a matchup myself.