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I will leave the chat up
-Live Chat- http://mibbit.com/?channel=%23222&server=irc.mibbit.net

We have moved to a more friendly environment-
www.222nd.webs.com

Lastly before i go...
To the mod who shut all of our regiments down, i'm looking at killkrazy here,

Thank you for completely disregarding all of our time and effort some of us put in... i appreciate it.



My final command..

Commissarial executions of the following...

Sister of krieg
Hezekial

151-Pilot Karrick- To make a suggestion wouldn't it be a good idea to move this into Dakka Fiction? ummm sir?

The Official Report of Nathaniel Damascus, Codenamed ineptus astartes

Aboard the sanctus mauve Nathaniel Damascus looked at the customized hatch in front of him and took in the details. It wasn't the picture of a pink leman russ MBT that made him nervous, nor was it the painting an adepta sororitas battle sister in a very compromising position either.

it was simply the fact that it was there.

come on nate! said a voice in his head. back out now, and the fething commasariat is gonna hand you your head, on a spike!

Taking a deep breath he adjusted the hang of his lasgun and pushed open the door.

Taking in the room around him he noted the three occupants: in the corner behind the watch desk a man with a red band tied around his head, smoking a lho stick and scowling at a a magazine, his his booted feet up on the desk and a steaming mug of recaf perilously close to them.

Second, a grizzled looking sergeant snoozing in his cot with a five o'clock shadow adorning a broad jaw. He would have looked intimidating if not for the sleep-mask he was wearing,

And thirdly, a trooper lying on a cot, and snoring the loudest Nathaniel had ever heard with a bottle of amasec clutched in his hand and several empty assorted bottles and cans lying by his feet.

Letting out his long breath Nathaniel started toward the duty officers desk.



rivate first class Nathaniel 'Nate' Damscus walked down the hall and remembered his earliest days on Catachan. He remembered arriving at the newly finished hive city, of Catachan Secundis, and noting that not a single deadly plant grew inside its walls. He remembered waking up the next day on his tenth story hab flat and nearly being throttled by a man-eating plant that had sprouted in the hall.

But that planet was behind him now. Though, in all honestly he did miss it: the morning snake stomp the chem clearing of his room and being lulled to sleep by the detonations of the barking toads in the forest while wearing a rebreather.

adjusting the hang of his lasgun he looked at the slip of paper the duty officer had given to him, it was simple directions to his platoon's sleep-block. When he finally arrived he had joined the large cluster of green troops at the door and crowded in with the rest of them when it was opened.

By the time he had joined the throng a commissar was barking out orders to the assemblage of gaurdmen.

"I'm not going to mince words." Said the commissar "my name is commissar Wasabi."

"Now, you are going to be assigned cubicles, with five beds to each!"looking down at his data-slate, he added "Excepting gamma squad which will be, six men and their sergant, to each, owing to a lack of troops."

"You will pick a bed, you will sleep in that bed, you will make friends, in that bed-wait, no." There was muffled laughter coming from the rank and file, as the commissar struggled to correct his rather embarrassing mistake. "um...ahh....continuing!" barked the black clad officer "You'r weapons and armor are in the foot lockers." wasabi said "The bedside tables are to be used for personal effects, that cannot be hung on walls."There was silence "well?! get to it!" the commissar almost hollered.

Walking to gamma squad’s hab block, he took stock of the build; the room they were occupying was a full three stories high, and each squad block was two stories high with storage on the top, and sleeping quarters at the bottom. Stepping inside Nate took a bed on the right wall near the door. Setting down his bag he peered around the room, the other troops that were in here:

Behind his cot was another co,t occupied by a trooper about his age and hight, wearing, what appeared to be a furry, vallhalan-style hat and carrying a backpack that looked like it could fit a chem-dog tank. Shifting his line of sight to the next cot, he saw a bedraggled looking solider with sergeant's stripes standing over 6 feet tall and an impressively developed physique, even for a catachan. Looking over to the far wall he watched as a trooper with a kukri, an immense machete like weapon on which the blade curved inward on an abrupt 45 degree angle, carefully paint the name 'Stumbo' on his bedstead.

On that same wall a trooper with the name 'Garm' stitched across his chest, collapsed on a bed and started snoring. on the wall opposite the door the vox-man set down his 'caster and began rummaging in his foot locker.

nate turned to his own locker and opened it.

______________________________________________________________________________________________________________

the contents were simple, a lasgun a stubgun ten las-packs and flak amour. The only thing different, was that his footlocker contained an armband, with the red cross of the ordos hospitalars and a large medi-kit. Nate went wide eyed and picking up the armband he slipped it onto his arm.

Closing the footlocker Nate laid back on his bed, and closed his eyes.

“Hello?” Nate opened one eye.

“Yes?” he said.

The be-capped trooper was sitting on his bed looking at him “Hey”

Nate sat up “hi, who are you?”

“Russki” the solider replied

“Nathaniel Damascus, but…err, call me Nate”

Russki looked at the armband. “You the platoon medic?”

Nate glanced at the armband and grinned, “yeah, medicae was one of my courses in scholum.”

“I see, you ever shot a lasgun?” asked Russki.

“Nah used an auto-rifle a few times though.”

Russki smirked, “Yeah, me too, ‘course on catachan, you loose your breathing privileges if you don’t know how to shoot a gun.”

Nate nodded “No kidding.”
Russki removed his pistol and began cleaning it.
“Where you from?”

“Hell-town, you know, the ruins of catachan secundis, you?”

“The starport”

“Oh? I’ve been there a couple times.”

There was a sharp crackle over the intercom followed by commissar wasabi’s barking voice
“Gamma platoon, report to the firing range, three decks below. You’re working with the sniper cadre today, move out!”
______________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Nate checked the load on his lasrifle and confirmed that it was fully operational, sighting down the iron sights he lined up the target downrange.
The target was a human torso and head, factory stamped, molded out of ballistics gel. Nate noted with some amusement that the word ‘heretic’ had been quickly scrawled on all of the bases. And that the target that was upon Nate’s base it was misspelled as ‘heretick’.
As the range was somewhat close to the genetoreum of the
Sanctus Mauve, the droning of the colossal engines steering them through the warp, could be heard loud and clear under commissar wasabi’s stentorian voice.

“ Check the load, and make sure the casing isn’t cracked! I don’t want any guardsmen flambés!” “All SWO’s will ues their las-pistols, one marksman to every three troops!”

Nate, Russki and a soldier with the name ‘J.P Jenkins’ stitched to his left breast-pocket lined up in a firing line, as a sniper by the name of ‘Maa’ (according to his dog-tags) approached.

“So.” Said the marksman “I’m gonna train you whiteshields how to shoot a lasrifle, but first we will recite the guardsman’s creed, repeat after me.”

Maa cleared his throat. And held his rifle so that the Aquila was facing the ceiling. “This is my rifle. There are many like it, but this one is mine.
My rifle is my best friend. It is my life. I must master it as I must master my life.
My rifle, without me, is useless. Without my rifle, I am useless. I must fire my rifle true. I must shoot straighter than my enemy, who is trying to kill me. I must shoot him before he shoots me. I will.
My rifle and myself know that what counts in this endless war is not the charges we fire, the noise of our burst, nor the smoke we make. We know that it is the hits that count. We will hit.
My rifle has a machine spirit, much as I have a soul, and it is my life. Thus, I will learn it as a brother. I will learn its weaknesses, its strength, its parts, its accessories, its sights and its barrel. I will ever guard it against the ravages of weather and damage as I will ever guard my legs, my arms, my eyes and my heart against damage. I will keep my rifle clean and ready. We will become part of each other. We will.
Before the Emperor, I swear this creed. My rifle and myself are the defenders of my race. We are the masters of our enemy. We are the saviors of my life.
So be it, until victory is the Imperium’s and there is no enemy, but peace!”

It took several tries but the assembled guardsmen managed to get it right.

Maa jestuerd downrange at the ‘heretic’ and began to speak.

“Everyone loaded? Good, now see that bust down there?”

the three troopers made noises in the general area of yesness

“Imagine that it has a star of chaos tattooed onto its forehead, everyone got that?”

Nate nodded, Jenkins hastily stowed a bottle of amasec he had been chugging behind the sniper’s back and gave a sheepish nod, but Russki was glaring at his target like he would like to sprint downrange and beat it no a pulp wit his lasrifle.

“Great… now blast it off.”


Taking a deep breath Nate squeezed the trigger, SNAPSNAPSNAP came the high report of the lasgun. Smoke obscured the target for a moment and when it cleared Jenkins sniggered.

“We-ell” Jenkins remarked. “You certainly would have caused him emotional pain.”

“Oh?” grumbled Nate.
“Yeah, he is now…” Jenkins paused for dramatic effect “Her-tick!”

“Bah.” Muttered Nate in a good natured way. Turning, Nate noticed that Russki was still blasting his own now slagged target, with a practical, if somewhat unimaginative battlecry.

“Die heretic! Die heretic! Die heretic! Die heretic! Die heretic!”

Maa taped the infuriated trooper on the shoulder “umm I think he’s dead.”
Russki turned with an embarrassed look and mumbled “I hate heretics…”

“As do we all,” said the marksman. “You were all decent in your own way’s but you all had problems:” Maa pointed at Russki, “You did manage to ‘kill’ it but you expended 95 percent of your mag.”
Switching to Nate he said. “You fired a good three shot burst by you didn’t hit his chest or head, you shot his ‘E’.
Pointing at Jenkins he said, “you’re a decent shot, but you fired only one round.”

Maa smirked. “This is how it’s done.” Lifting his long-las he sighted down the barrel and sent three shots screaming downrange, blasting the head of Nate’s target apart in a shower of flesh colored gel and artificial blood.
The recruits jaws hit he floor and their eyes grew as big as soup plates, when a stern voice cut though their dumbstruckedness.
“All hands, prepare for emergency translation.”


Nate grabbed the railings in front of him and held on tight. As the ship shuddered violently Nate heard a clink and a cry of dismay. Turning his head he saw Jenkins chasing after an amasec bottle that had fallen out of his pocket.

“H-h-hold on too th-th-that r-r-ailing!” hollered Maa
As soon as the words left his mouth, the ship gave an almighty lurch and flung the occupants of the firing ranges across the room.
The world slowed down as Nate was flung through the air and saw the upside-down ghili-suited form of a sniper turning to look at him and recoil in surprise

“!”

SLAM!
Nate was laying on some sort of course material with leaves stuck to it, opening his eyes he noted the dog-tag three inches from his nose it read ‘JayneKateBob.’
Nate was puzzled ‘what kind of parents would name their son, ‘JayneKateBob?’

“Ahem” came higher than normal voice.

“Huh?” said Nate.

“Get off of me.”

Turning his head Nat beheld a glaring visage.
“Sorry sir, lost my footing” he said as Russki helped him up. “what was that lurch anyway?”

JKB regarded him coldly. “I have no idea” he said and walked off.

“Well he was friendly” muttered Russki.

“Yeah, I guess that’s what comes with big muscled guys.”
“What?” asked Russki.
Nate gestured in JKB’s direction. “Either he’s got huge muscle’s under that shirt or he's got huge man-boobs.”
Behind them there was a shout of triumph, as Jenkins found his amasec bottle, and hurried over.

“Hey what-” said Russki before Jenkins shoved an extra beer bottle at him.

“huh?” was all Nate could say before Jenkins handed him one as well.

“What’s all this?” asked Russki.

“contraband.” Hiccupped Jenkins happily while taking a swig.
Nate looked over at Russki, who shook his head furiously.

______________________________________________________________________________________________________________


“And then I said to him...I…I…I forgot?” mumbled Jenkins as Nate and Russki guided him unsteadily towards the hab deck.

“Boy, muttered Russki, as he got a better grip on Jenkins’ left arm, “what did he have for lunch, bricks?”

“Maybe a space marine.” Grunted Nate as he dragged the all too heavy drunk back to the platoon hab.

Russki adjusted his grip on Jenkins’ shoulder again. “You know, I- what was that?”

“What was what?” asked Nate

“It sounded like… gunfire.”
Nate strained his hearing as they turned the corner “I don’t-AHHH!”

A small squad consisting of five ork ‘boyz’ was rooting through the platoon’s hab deck. Jenkins was dropped on the floor, as the other two troopers went for their las-rifles.
Nate sprayed a trio of las-bolts at the ork coming at him which was wielding a massive ‘choppa.’ the ork flew back howling as the bolts connected with it’s arm and blew bloody holes in it.
Russki managed to blast one’s chest plate off but the ork got up again, snarling.
Before it could do anything though, there was a loud rumbling, and the orks disappeared in spurts of blood and viscera.
Whipping his head around Nate saw Pfc. Bex rush in and chamber another autogun mag.

At this point Jenkins sat up. “What I miss?”

151-Pilot Karrick-The report contains fan made fiction and so belongs in Dakka Fiction. A good idea might be to create another thread in Battle Reports and link it to this one...

purplefood wrote:151-Pilot Karrick-The report contains fan made fiction and so belongs in Dakka Fiction. A good idea might be to create another thread in Battle Reports and link it to this one...

000-Marshall Larkin- Thank you Karrick, where can i get this moved? we already have the recruitment thread in general, and i like the idea of having an in depth battle report with casualties etc posted here, i hope you don't die too soon, i could use officers like yourself in the general staff

151-Pilot Karrick-That triangular yellow button in the corner of each post should do fine... i hope so too...

000-Marshall Larkin-I'm on it, thank you Pilot.

75-Gunner Jayne - when's our first engagement with the enemy, sir?

<starts loading trucks in preparation for the move over to Dakka Fiction>

49 - Private Jerig Waelo reporting for duty! May the emperor protect!

I just want to be a sniper...

coolyo294 wrote:I just want to be a sniper...

151-Pilot Karrick-Well you get to snipe tanks with big scary looking weapons until the regiment gets issued with sniper rifles... of course there is a spare spot in Sentinel Squadron I if you're willing.

purplefood wrote:

coolyo294 wrote:I just want to be a sniper...

151-Pilot Karrick-Well you get to snipe tanks with big scary looking weapons until the regiment gets issued with sniper rifles... of course there is a spare spot in Sentinel Squadron I if you're willing.

So this means I have to be a Sentinel pilot until the regiment gets sniper rifles?

coolyo294 wrote:

purplefood wrote:

coolyo294 wrote:I just want to be a sniper...

151-Pilot Karrick-Well you get to snipe tanks with big scary looking weapons until the regiment gets issued with sniper rifles... of course there is a spare spot in Sentinel Squadron I if you're willing.

So this means I have to be a Sentinel pilot until the regiment gets sniper rifles?

151-Pilot Karrick-You don't have to be but that much steel has to be safer than flak armour...

purplefood wrote:

coolyo294 wrote:

purplefood wrote:

coolyo294 wrote:I just want to be a sniper...

151-Pilot Karrick-Well you get to snipe tanks with big scary looking weapons until the regiment gets issued with sniper rifles... of course there is a spare spot in Sentinel Squadron I if you're willing.

So this means I have to be a Sentinel pilot until the regiment gets sniper rifles?

151-Pilot Karrick-You don't have to be but that much steel has to be safer than flak armour...

Mmmkay. I want one with a Las-Cannon though.

coolyo294 wrote:

purplefood wrote:

coolyo294 wrote:

purplefood wrote:

coolyo294 wrote:I just want to be a sniper...

151-Pilot Karrick-Well you get to snipe tanks with big scary looking weapons until the regiment gets issued with sniper rifles... of course there is a spare spot in Sentinel Squadron I if you're willing.

So this means I have to be a Sentinel pilot until the regiment gets sniper rifles?

151-Pilot Karrick-You don't have to be but that much steel has to be safer than flak armour...

Mmmkay. I want one with a Las-Cannon though.

151-Pilot Karrick- Welcome to the first squadron 152
Make sure the Marshall knows what's what...

purplefood wrote:

coolyo294 wrote:

purplefood wrote:

coolyo294 wrote:

purplefood wrote:

coolyo294 wrote:I just want to be a sniper...

151-Pilot Karrick-Well you get to snipe tanks with big scary looking weapons until the regiment gets issued with sniper rifles... of course there is a spare spot in Sentinel Squadron I if you're willing.

So this means I have to be a Sentinel pilot until the regiment gets sniper rifles?

151-Pilot Karrick-You don't have to be but that much steel has to be safer than flak armour...

Mmmkay. I want one with a Las-Cannon though.

151-Pilot Karrick- Welcome to the first squadron 152
Make sure the Marshall knows what's what...

Gotcha!

Could I be a psyker?

Altzer wrote:Could I be a psyker?

165 - Lord Commissar Von Humps - HERESY! Possibly that is....Check with the Marshal, i believe he said something about a Primaris Psyker, and the position being available.

so are there any tank crew positions available? short of that are there any vendetta/valkyrie spots available (as either a pilot or air cav.)? and short of that I would love to be assigned to a heavy weapons team, for the emperor hath blesses me with a love of all big guns that make big booms, especially those of the auto variety! name is (insert rank) Arkanian.

may the emperor protect.
-thatirishguy-

SWO-106 -"pyro"- Sir? when are we gonna engage some enimies? my sqaud and I are getting restless.

000-Marshall Larkin-Morning troopers, i have updated the list. We will have some snipers soon, though i cant guarentee they will see much combat- and unfortunately, we have no vehicles assigned to us Arkanian, so i have instead forwarded you to alpha support, as our role is to be infanntry support,and thy want to use our expertise as all-terrain troopers,lastly our first battle should be about 2 weeks away, depending on warp transit time. The Emperor Protects.

This is a fun thread however properly belongs in the Fiction forum.

Kilkrazy wrote:This is a fun thread however properly belongs in the Fiction forum.

I Have used the report button to bring this to someones attention just waiting for someone to do the honours of organising transfer for the men.

Aha, thank you KilKrazy

just waiting for someone to do the honours of organising transfer for the men.

<coughcoughandwomensircoughcough>

CadianCommander wrote:

just waiting for someone to do the honours of organising transfer for the men.

<coughcoughandwomensircoughcough>

Did you ever see blackadder? if so, you are our regimental equivalent to Bob, this is meant to be an all male regiment, i have procured some snipers, so my hope is people won't notice under a ghillie suit...

the only problem is, as a sniper i can't guarantee you will see much action as they are rarely deployed with the bulk of our army

91 Pvt. Riellan reporting in! You need it killed quick, I'm your man.

I added you, really looking forward to seeing where this goes. Hope to see some good battle reports! I'm sure we dakkaites won't let you down.

If you need help with anything, be sure to let me know. This is a really unique idea.

43-pvt Chelkar reporting for duty, Sah!

Welcome Chelkar, we will hopefully be seeing active duty no more than a week and a half as soon as the first founding is complete.