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Here is a short story, which lays the foundations to my Ogre Kingdoms tribe. I hope you enjoy!

Part 1: A Short Story of Warning.

“You’d like me to tell you a story? Hmmm… ok, I have one to tell, but it is one of a powerful creature and stands as a warning should you find yourself walking the lands of this world. So I hope your sitting comfortably… yes? Then I shall begin.

To the east of the Empire, over the Black Mountains, through the blasted ash-wastes of the Dark-lands, lays the Mountains of Mourn, home to the Ogre Kingdoms. Here in the predator rich snowy lands, amongst the nomadic Ogre race, there once existed a tribe known to outsiders as the “Snowstalker Tribe”. They were a small tribe with a predilection for hunting and migrating during snowfall, this was mostly to cover both their scent and tracks during such times. It was in the course of one of their great hunts that things changed beyond all measure for their number, when they happened upon a Pride of Mournfang that was of extraordinary size. The tribe became hopelessly outmatched when the vicious beasts sprang their trap on the hapless Ogres; quickly the hunt became a bloodbath for them. Hunters now became prey, and despite the Ogres vast size and brute strength they soon fled, leaving everything they possessed in an attempt to flee from the beastly mountain cats.

Soon the din of the massacre died down as the last blood curdling scream echoed through the mountains. In that moment from the Mournfang’s number, there stepped forward a hulking great male which was the Alpha of the pride, and as it made its way through the bloody corpses of the Ogres it came across the lone survivor, a small almost new born Ogreling. With trepidation, both the Ogreling and Alpha moved towards one another, and as the gurgling infant sat there in the snow, it reached out towards the snout of the giant beast. The Alpha sniffed the Ogreling in return, and licked it once across its face. Something inside the beast changed in that moment, and with a low growl the Alpha signalled to one of the others from the pride which stepped forward and took the chubby infant Ogre into its maw. The pride then strode off into the mountains towards their den, the Ogreling gurgling and giggling all the way as they left the scene of the slaughter far behind them.

There in the Mournfang’s den the Ogreling was raised as part of the Pride, suckled at first on the females, and then subsequently taught to hunt by the males when old enough. As the infant grew into adolescence and the years wound on, he showed an uncanny ability to adapt and learn at an incredible pace, despite the difference of species. Somewhat intuitively, to fit in with the Pride he took the skull and fur from a Mournfang, which had challenged the Ogres place amongst them and was subsequently killed by him in combat. Now fully accepted amongst their number, the almost fully grown Ogre had shown cunning, aggression and boldness in tactics which, led to the Mournfang’s ascendancy as top predator in the region, above that of the Ogres themselves within the Kingdom.

One dawn as the Mournfang slept within their den, the Ogre was plagued by visions in his sleep. Fitfully he tossed and turned, witnessing scenes of fire and molten ore, the smell of ash and brimstone overloaded his senses, and forced him to wake from his nightmarish dream. The images and smells shifted into one glowing light which burned like a beacon in his mind’s eye, and even upon his sweaty awakening the light still burned off in a direction he had never thought to travel before. Curiously he sat there pondering what he had seen, but it wasn’t long before he had made his choice. Silently he took off his mantle of skull and fur placing them neatly in his sleeping place, and naked as the day he arrived, the Ogre left the Mournfang’s cave towards his unseen goal.

For days he walked, crossing mountains, rivers and forests, encountering things the likes of which he could never have dreamed on his journey, constantly being drawn like a moth to flame by the beacon that blazed in his mind. It was upon his eighth day of travel that the Ogre found himself following one of the many tributaries that flowed out of the Mountains and headed south. Soon he found himself with a choice to make, before him stood the vast width of the River Ruin; should he choose to cross its unknown depths, or give up and return to the Pride which had raised him? The light which guided him this far pulled too strong on his senses, and so the Ogre waded into the slow freezing waters of the river. Ice flowed past his bulk as the waters rose around his neck, but thankfully that was as deep as the waters grew and it wasn’t long before he had crossed its cold darkness. Dragging himself from the waters, he crawled along the ground, chilled to the bone by the unnatural icy touch of the river and struggling to catch his breath. After a short rest, the Ogre regained his composure and began on his way into the unimaginably featureless plane of ash and sand that sprawled beyond his sight from under his feet, confused by the sudden change in both terrain and temperature.

On the third day of crossing the planes, after fighting off hallucinations, hunger and thirst, the Ogre spotted something heading his way. With no terrain to hide behind, he decided to adopt an aggressive stance, taking up the biggest of rocks he could find in each of his hands as makeshift weapons. Soon the shapes took on a form, making out colour amongst its size of brass and blackness, glinting in the harsh desert light. Despite the vastness of colour, as the mass approached the Ogre he realised the stature of what headed his way was much less than he had first imagined, barely the height of half his stout leg. Still wary of the tiny things before him, he stayed an unmoving statue as the wall of sixty or more tiny things stood to attention before him. The shiny warriors, who sported masks and huge beards of black which were more ornate than the armour they wore, parted to let a slightly taller one of their number out from within their ranks. This one was different from the rest, being unmasked and rather grim of nature, with heads hung as trophies from his body and other such trinkets. Soon it dawned on the Ogre, and through his fatigue he realised this thing before him was the light-beacon which had guided him here.

Pointing a finger at the Ogre, the tiny thing growled in a voice not unlike a roaring furnace, and slammed his fist into his own chest. The Ogre in return dropped his makeshift weapons, approaching the thing before him, moved to his knees, sniffed once and as he sensed something from the strange tiny thing, he lay prostrate before him. With a loud shout from the armed and armoured things, they bore arms and made to march on the Ogre in protection of their master. With a raised hand from the unmasked one, their number ceased their advance as quickly as they had begun, parting to let him back within their ranks. With a gesture towards him to follow, the Ogre got from his knees and entered their ranks nervously. With loud metallic stomping, the wall of warriors turned about face and headed back into the Dark-lands from whence they came, their new charge safely within their number.

Over the following months the Ogre was taught both the written and spoken languages of his benefactor, who he had learnt was of a race called the Dawi Zharr, as well as the world he now inhabited, and his mentors name; Dai’Khororr. He plied the Dawi Zharr’s trades and ways of war, marching with his tutor wherever he went, never ceasing with his tutelage even in battle. It was on one fateful day when the Ogre’s life changed beyond all measure; he was shadowing Dai’Khororr as he was binding a creature of balefire within runes and hell-forged iron, with the powerful arcana he could control. With a thunderous crack, something had gone wrong with the incantation, and seeing the skein of magic fail, the ogre threw himself between his master and the ruinous energy that flooded the room. Within seconds everything was quiet and the energies had dispersed. The Ogre now lay atop his master unmoving, but slowly his vast rent form shifted; miraculously they both had survived. As Dai’Khororr tended to his faithful students wounds he witnessed them knit, but upon their closing the area around them turned to stone, hardening. Within moments half the Ogres body had become movable rock, still allowing all the movement he had had before. That wasn’t the only change Dai’Khororr saw within the Ogre, for he could see the winds of magic flow through his veins, the obvious result of taking the full force of the arcane explosion.

For saving his master the Ogre was given the name Uzkul Dhralu’kau, meaning “Skull Brother of Stone”, and within days of his accident, he had mastered the power which now flowed from within him. After a lengthy discussion with his mentor, Dai’Khororr had suggested to his student a plan to benefit each other using Uzkul’s newfound abilities, and dawn the following day saw his departure from the Dark-lands. Acting upon his mentors instructions, the Ogre had returned to the lands of his upbringing, first to the Pride of Mournfang’s which had raised him to reassert himself as a friend of the beasts, and secondly to bring about the control of the Ogre tribe to which he had been born. The Mournfang followed Uzkul willingly; sensing the power within their former Pride-member, but the Ogre tribe did not succeed their power to him willingly. After a month of attrition and slaughter, the tribe pledged their loyalty to their lost son due to the unstoppable power he unleashed upon them in the combined form of arcana and Mournfang’s. From within the Ogre Kingdoms, Uzkul established a new tribe, one which moved swiftly on the backs of Mournfang, and traded slaves they took for armour and weapons with the Dawi Zharr. The tribe eventually established a permanent home in the west of the Mountains of Mourn, creating a perfect place to strike from to collect slaves destined for the Dark-lands.

So I say to you beware, if you enter the Ogre Kingdoms… if you find yourself lost in the west of the Mountains of Mourn, you may find yourself at the mercy of the “Slavetaker” Tribe, just prey they don’t take you alive…



Whats that? You wish to know how I came into the knowledge of this? Hah, that’s another story entirely I’m afraid, and one which will have to wait…”

Part 2: Size Matters.

“You want another story, so soon? Do you bother all old men for such things or just me? Ok… you win, you win… Let’s see…

Some two score years passed after Uzkul’s return to the mountains and tribe of his birth, now the Slavetaker’s thrived under his leadership, not only did they feast well, they had also amassed a substantial hoard of riches to trade with as well as to pay tithes to the Goldtooth tribe (a fact which pained Uzkul greatly, but still, anything for a quiet life). Slaves of all races poured into the Darklands, guarded by the Slavetaker’s best and strongest Ogres. The Slaves were Uzkul’s tithe to his master, one which he didn’t begrudge as for the most part they tasted “stringy”, and so their journey would ultimately take them into a (short) life of cruel servitude in the lightless depths of a Dawi Zharr citadel. During this period Uzkul had taken himself a Sow, much to the tribe’s surprise. She was hideous, even by Ogre standards, but her ugliness was only surpassed by her ruthlessness and cunning to succeed. The pair were a perfect match, and she was the first and only member of the tribe to talk down to Uzkul publically and live, but only just, having successfully thwarted an assassination attempt on his life, by eating what turned out to be a poisoned portion of Rhinoxen right off of his plate. She then subsequently shrugged off the said poison with a gut-gurgling belch, sat down, and continued eating her own vast plateful. This sow’s name was Naggi Brainclumpa, an unimaginative name granted, but it was one which reflected her aggressive yet affective method of bashing out the brains of anyone who crossed her with a tree stump-come-rolling pin. After she had saved Uzkul’s life (and some arguing later), she was awarded the title of “Taster of the Feast”. Which was not only a title of high regard, but one usually saved for a tribes Slaughtermaster, not a mere Butcher as she was. But as the position of Tyrant and Slaughtermaster were held simultaneously by Uzkul, this was mostly overlooked by the tribe, in favour of the consensus that to keep quiet was to live longer.

Uzkul and Naggi went on to rear several Ogreling’s with only a couple living into adolescence due to the brutal challenges Ogre society faces on a day to day basis. Yet despite Uzkul having everything he could want, something was missing in his life. A feeling had begun to gnaw at his very gut, and no matter what, he couldn’t shake the restlessness that ate at him. Days and months passed, and as the feeling grew to the point of being unbearable, he finally consulted the tribes Butchers, and after much debate the group concurred what the cause was. The Great Maw was calling to Uzkul, something which haunts all ogres at some point in their life, and so it was time to make the pilgrimage to the dread place where the Ogre god resides. Now nothing is known of what took place upon Uzkul’s visiting of the Great Maw, and he has never uttered a word of it to anyone, not even Naggi. What is known though, is that upon his return, Uzkul wasn’t alone; a vast hoard of Greenskins had accompanied him back from the east. Now these were not the usual tide of Gnoblars that pretty much sprang from every nook and cranny in the Mountains of Mourn, these were Savage Orcs and Forest Goblins of the Shattered Peak, a region that boarders the land where the Great Maw resides, and one which takes a particular kind of cunning to survive in, not forgetting a little madness too. At first the tribe thought Uzkul had returned with the Greenskins as some sort of meal, but after some lengthy discussion, face smashing and a lot of gesticulation, he managed to convince them all that it would be explained in a great tale at a feast to be held that very evening.

Now the feasting hall of the tribe was and is the very same chamber in which the Mournfang reside when not out hunting. When unlit, it is not only eerily small but pitch black and offers only a modicum of heat from the harsh cold. But when the braziers are lit, it truly comes alive. The first noticeable change from when it’s dark, is the sheer size of the cave, being larger than the mighty cathedrals dedicated to Sigmar, not only that, the ceiling shone brilliantly with gems, crystals and hematite that studded it in vast swathes of brilliant blacks, reds and purples. Despite the overall size of the hall it required very little amounts of braziers to be lit, needing only three, and the properties of the ceiling also stole the heat which the fires spat out and radiated it back tenfold. The floor of the great hall on the other hand was less beautiful, partitioned throughout and littered with countless piles of junk and treasure. The extreme edge of the room was used as housing during the winter season to provide welcome shelter against the ravaging snow storms. Now the very centre of the room was reserved for the Butchers; here vast cauldrons, cooking implements and fire-pits used for cooking during feast days resided, and was strictly no admittance allowed unless you wanted a part of you used in the cooking. The rest of the chamber was organised into fighting pits, cages for both slaves and live food, and the vast higgledy Gnoblar shanty town, which had appeared one night but not one of the Ogres seemed to have noticed particularly. Further still, amongst the chaotic “streets” the Mournfang made their dens, which for the most part were avoided, with the exception of their riders and the odd hapless Gnoblar which made a tasty light snack.

To say the feast that evening went without a hitch would be a lie. Uzkul’s enemies within the tribe had plotted to use the Greenskins arrival to gain some kind of political foothold against him, and it was during the presentation of the heart of a freshly killed Rhinoxen to the Savage Orc Leader that things truly kicked off. Five of the tribes bruisers strode out, the biggest of them wrenched the heart from the hulking Orcs hand, and threw it to the dirt. Uzkul was unable to tolerate the insolence and stepped forward between that of the rebellious Ogres and the Orcs leader, and he told the group to back down or face his wrath. But the Bruisers were in no position to back down now, it was do or die, or face a life of exile, and the latter was no option. Seeing the position the Bruisers were in a few dozen of the tribes Ogres stepped up to support them. With this Uzkul didn’t say anymore, and as he turned to the Orc he nodded letting out a sigh. The Orc instinctually knew Uzkul’s meaning and chuckled in a low guttural way which only a member of his kind could. The pair moved in complete harmony, complimenting each other’s fighting prowess perfectly. The lone Orc and Ogre set upon the traitors using fists, teeth, rocks, brute strength and a savage ferocity to literally tear their opponents apart. The Orc, midway through the fight, was hurled through the air head first by Uzkul at a group of eight Ogres. The Greenskin simply chortled as he flew wielding a pair of Ogre forearms as weapons which he had “acquired” moments before the aerobatics took place.

In minutes it was over, and Uzkul and the Orc stood victorious atop the corpses of the rebels, with not a single one remaining alive. One of the Butchers made his way to Uzkul clutching the dusted Rhinoxen heart, who in return re-presented it to the Orc. Who then sniffed it and raised it above his head, before bellowing the most ungodly roar known to man, and ripping huge chunks from it with his tusk-like teeth as he chomped down on it. Uzkul joined in the roar and soon the entire feast hall echoed with the sound of Ogres and Greenskins alike in celebration of the victory and soon the fest resumed. Gnoblar servants made their ways to huge tables with chunks of cooked flesh and flagons of their “home brew”. Ogres sang of battles long since fought and Orcs partook in weird fungal substances before dancing about and chanting, to which even some Ogres followed suit. As the feast wound into the small hours of the morning, Uzkul announced the Greenskins to be blood-brothers of the tribe and that every Ogre and Orc alike should make the mark and share their blood with the new kin. This just made them drink, eat and become even more raucous than before. By dawn not a single member of the Greenskins or Ogres even cared that the fight had happened, most were either too drunk or nursing sore heads. And so within weeks the Slavetaker’s had reached new heights of excellence in victory, having raided the boarders of Cathay, Ind, The Empire and even the lands further south in search or slaves and riches.

It was during this time I was taken on one of their raids through Kislev, but I grow weary now, and that my friend is a story which will have to wait…”

So with a few reads, does anyone have any comments to add, likes or dislikes, improvements or things that seem silly?

I liked it, but I play 40k so I really couldn't give any tips. All in all, seemed pretty interesting to me.

Thanks Obsidian!

Anytime !

finally i´ve read the story... read it also in your thread and i must say i particularly like the opening... this has a certain ring and feel of the old conan movies...much power...

i´ve yet havent read anything WHFB like but i think you made a good attempt to give insights into a beastly nature... (by the way... i actually had to google Mournfang...yeah...i know^^)

good work mister!

How should I say this in a polite tone.... Have you even read one ounce of Chaos Dwarf fluff? One of their key characteristic features is that they hate ANYTHING that is not a Chaos Dwarf. They would never provide this amount of aid to a mere Ogre, no mater what happened. In fact they are more likely to sacrifice it to their god. Or use it as a common slave. And the price for failing such an ritual as you described is death for any Chaos Dwarf. Failure is never an option in their lands. It was a okay read but these things I have pointed out really, really ruined it. I suggest reading more about CD and Ogres then having another go at it.

But kudos for trying

 Trondheim wrote:
How should I say this in a polite tone.... Have you even read one ounce of Chaos Dwarf fluff? One of their key characteristic features is that they hate ANYTHING that is not a Chaos Dwarf. They would never provide this amount of aid to a mere Ogre, no mater what happened. In fact they are more likely to sacrifice it to their god. Or use it as a common slave. And the price for failing such an ritual as you described is death for any Chaos Dwarf. Failure is never an option in their lands. It was a okay read but these things I have pointed out really, really ruined it. I suggest reading more about CD and Ogres then having another go at it.

But kudos for trying

Wow could you have been any more rude?

Firstly the fluff has changed and adapted. Chaos Dwarves trade all the time with the Ogres, and there is nothing set in stone to say this wouldn't happen. Background changes all the time, and considering out of hundreds of people who have read it, that you are the first to be so rude towards it shows you are in the minority.

But thanks for trying.

 Viktor von Domm wrote:
finally i´ve read the story... read it also in your thread and i must say i particularly like the opening... this has a certain ring and feel of the old conan movies...much power...

i´ve yet havent read anything WHFB like but i think you made a good attempt to give insights into a beastly nature... (by the way... i actually had to google Mournfang...yeah...i know^^)

good work mister!

Thanks Vik, I much appreciate it!

An Ogre licking your face, that is the moment before an Ogre is eating you, not showing puppylike behavior. Have the Ogre instead procastrating himself before the Chaos Dwarf. As that behavior the Ogre showed would earn him many bullets from the blunderblusses of the strange little guys. I like the read in general, except for the scene of the Ogre licking the face of a Chaos of a Chaos Dwarf. Plus they are a bunch of haters of others so such displays of loyalty wouldn't be tolerated, they are hard and ruthless, using the whip not the carrot to their slaves. Gulliver's travels would be how they would capture a Giant f.ex.

 Beaviz81 wrote:
An Ogre licking your face, that is the moment before an Ogre is eating you, not showing puppylike behavior. Have the Ogre instead procastrating himself before the Chaos Dwarf. As that behavior the Ogre showed would earn him many bullets from the blunderblusses of the strange little guys. I like the read in general, except for the scene of the Ogre licking the face of a Chaos of a Chaos Dwarf. Plus they are a bunch of haters of others so such displays of loyalty wouldn't be tolerated, they are hard and ruthless, using the whip not the carrot to their slaves. Gulliver's travels would be how they would capture a Giant f.ex.

Well the face licking was a bit I put in after watching a wildlife program on lions, when they accepted an outsider within the pride they licked it to be sure of it. I may rework that scene tbh, but I'll have to have a think on it. Thanks for the imput!

 AnUnearthlyChilde wrote:

 Trondheim wrote:
How should I say this in a polite tone.... Have you even read one ounce of Chaos Dwarf fluff? One of their key characteristic features is that they hate ANYTHING that is not a Chaos Dwarf. They would never provide this amount of aid to a mere Ogre, no mater what happened. In fact they are more likely to sacrifice it to their god. Or use it as a common slave. And the price for failing such an ritual as you described is death for any Chaos Dwarf. Failure is never an option in their lands. It was a okay read but these things I have pointed out really, really ruined it. I suggest reading more about CD and Ogres then having another go at it.

But kudos for trying

Wow could you have been any more rude?

Firstly the fluff has changed and adapted. Chaos Dwarves trade all the time with the Ogres, and there is nothing set in stone to say this wouldn't happen. Background changes all the time, and considering out of hundreds of people who have read it, that you are the first to be so rude towards it shows you are in the minority.

But thanks for trying.

Dont tempt me.... And trading with Ogers normally involves a large risk, even if conducted on neutral ground . You dont peacefully trade with something that likes to snack on anything from Humans to Giants. And post something that stays within the last update to CD fluff and I might just give you a smiley. Secondly when you ask for the opinions of Dakka dont expect roses from everyone, I dont bother with sugarcoating it. And for the last part, yes there is a reason why CD dont have friends, they see all the other races as inferior! I recommended reading Thamurkan Throne Of Chaos for more info in this, assuming you have the book

I wasn't aware rudeness is a requirement here, but it seems more and more like it. The only violation of the CD-fluff I saw was the part with the Ogre licking the face, and I explained in polite terms how to make that better. Learn some bloody politeness. A game shall be for fun and laughter not for unloading bile on anyone not up to your bloody standards.

Rudeness? You clearly have not seen me at a bad then then. And you know what, the definition of fun varies from person to person. And yes, I do like my stories to be kept within the limits set by the current published fluff. And welcome to my ignore list

Trondheim wrote:

 AnUnearthlyChilde wrote:

 Trondheim wrote:
How should I say this in a polite tone.... Have you even read one ounce of Chaos Dwarf fluff? One of their key characteristic features is that they hate ANYTHING that is not a Chaos Dwarf. They would never provide this amount of aid to a mere Ogre, no mater what happened. In fact they are more likely to sacrifice it to their god. Or use it as a common slave. And the price for failing such an ritual as you described is death for any Chaos Dwarf. Failure is never an option in their lands. It was a okay read but these things I have pointed out really, really ruined it. I suggest reading more about CD and Ogres then having another go at it.

But kudos for trying

Wow could you have been any more rude?

Firstly the fluff has changed and adapted. Chaos Dwarves trade all the time with the Ogres, and there is nothing set in stone to say this wouldn't happen. Background changes all the time, and considering out of hundreds of people who have read it, that you are the first to be so rude towards it shows you are in the minority.

But thanks for trying.

Dont tempt me.... And trading with Ogers normally involves a large risk, even if conducted on neutral ground . You dont peacefully trade with something that likes to snack on anything from Humans to Giants. And post something that stays within the last update to CD fluff and I might just give you a smiley. Secondly when you ask for the opinions of Dakka dont expect roses from everyone, I dont bother with sugarcoating it. And for the last part, yes there is a reason why CD dont have friends, they see all the other races as inferior! I recommended reading Thamurkan Throne Of Chaos for more info in this, assuming you have the book

There seem to be spaces within your fluff memory. Two tribes of Ogres trade regularly and peacefully (as it can be) with the Dawi Zharr, The Ironskin's and The Slavetakers (not my a tribeof my making but one I decided to expand upon). both keep the supply of Slaves flowing to Zharr Nagrund regularly, with no recourse or fowl play, in return for gunpowder, leadbeltcher cannons, armour etc.

Fluff for Chaos Dwarves doesn't exist purely within the old army book and Turmakhan you know. But also this game allows for personal interpretation and expansion on the story. Its free-flowing and is meant to challenge peoples imaginations.

Lastly, there is a difference between saying something how it is, and being rude. I suggest you try learning the difference some time.

Beaviz81 wrote:I wasn't aware rudeness is a requirement here, but it seems more and more like it. The only violation of the CD-fluff I saw was the part with the Ogre licking the face, and I explained in polite terms how to make that better. Learn some bloody politeness. A game shall be for fun and laughter not for unloading bile on anyone not up to your bloody standards.

Well Said.

Trondheim wrote:Rudeness? You clearly have not seen me at a bad then then. And you know what, the definition of fun varies from person to person. And yes, I do like my stories to be kept within the limits set by the current published fluff. And welcome to my ignore list

You ignore people for standing up for politeness?

silly person is silly.

I ask for open and constructive criticism, not rudeness. If all you can do is be the latter, the I ask politely you refrain from commenting.

mind you... i flinched when reading trondheims first comment... but you child gained some hefty kharma points today for such smooth and sweet talk...! i am truly humbled by your way to handle ogres and trolls alike! you are a master of the beasts it seems!

 Viktor von Domm wrote:
mind you... i flinched when reading trondheims first comment... but you child gained some hefty kharma points today for such smooth and sweet talk...! i am truly humbled by your way to handle ogres and trolls alike! you are a master of the beasts it seems!

haha, well what can I say, I'm awesome!

well known fact... well known fact....

hahahaha

Man, what a close minded ignoramus. He is two years to late for his dance with a rusty coat hanger. Cock sucker aside, awesome story. I love fluff.

Thanks Erreul!!!

in a little bit of news, I am currently working on a second part to this story. so expect it in the not to distant future!!!

My friend, this is an awesome part of fluff. You have done really well (better then the fantasy stuff I produce in my free time ).

@trondheim: For the emperors name, boy! How can a human being be just that rude! Do you like stomping little childrens sand castles for fun too?

I have updated the story to sort out the only bone of contention, the face licking scene. So I hope you all enjoy the little rewrite!

Part 2 is progressing nicely, if a little slow... but, its providing me with some laughs writing it lols.

 The Observer wrote:
My friend, this is an awesome part of fluff. You have done really well (better then the fantasy stuff I produce in my free time ).

Thank you so much, heh, it means a lot for people to like it.

@trondheim: For the emperors name, boy! How can a human being be just that rude! Do you like stomping little childrens sand castles for fun too?

I have to admit, I belly laughed at this bit...

Somebody has obviously been playing Civilization II. You got to love that science adviser, and the Elvis guy was Sid himself. Also I'm guessing someone have been watching Deadwood as well, Wu rules.

I like the change, I will likely have something else to nit-pick at the next chapter, but I suspect it to be a minor detail, but that is of little consequence. Your fluff is your fluff. Suggestions are just suggestions.

 Beaviz81 wrote:
Somebody has obviously been playing Civilization II. You got to love that science adviser, and the Elvis guy was Sid himself. Also I'm guessing someone have been watching Deadwood as well, Wu rules.

I like the change, I will likely have something else to nit-pick at the next chapter, but I suspect it to be a minor detail, but that is of little consequence. Your fluff is your fluff. Suggestions are just suggestions.

haha, true, but I like to cater for a wider audience. If I do things purely for myself then when other read it it generally doesnt go down well. And just as a sneak peak, the Dawi Zharr are still mentioned, but this is about my Tribe, so the story shifts to Ogre characters as well as their greenskin allies... thems be da crazies

Part two now available in OP ^_^

How about just posting whatever you have written directly instead of doing it this complicated.

"The more complicated a matter is, the less people will understand it."

He updated the opening post here with part 2 some hours ago. I suspect the post he made above yours was simply overlooked when he did so, especially since the linked thread has been deleted.

Opps... yes, as Avatar said lols... eeesh I forgot, you can't be as awesome as me without forgetting something every now and again

Once again a wonderful job.