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Just like the title says. For me, the closest brush came when I was walking through a forest with my company back in my Marine Reserve days. Three Brama bulls came charging at me out of the growth about 50 feet to my right. With nowhere to easily get to for shelter before they reached me, I figured I was dead. With that in mind, I decided I wasn't going to die running away, so I charged into them. At the point when I would have been stomped or gored to death they split apart just enough to where I could get between them without being gutted by their horns.
I kept running through them until I went down over a point where I couldn't see them and they couldn't see me. After enough time passed where I figured they were gone, I went back up the hill in time to hear my platoon sergent calling for the Corpsman. It turned out they were calling a Corpsman for me since they saw me dive into the Bulls and disappear and figured I'd been carried off by the critters.

It further turned out that it was not just three that I ran through, but six. Surprisngly, I wasn't in any shaky condition but just shrugged and continued on, although it did give me a good story to tell.

I was pushed in front of a car as a child. I have no idea how I really made it out of that one. I suppose after I was pushed I quickly jumped back or something, because the car still clipped me. It wasn't going fast (probably only twenty-five or thirty miles per hour) but I was thrown and spun down to the ground pretty hard. I was pretty banged up too. No hospital stays or anything. The person driving the car actually called my school though and got the kid in a ton of trouble. Although he was just messing around, not trying to kill me.

Relapse wrote:Just like the title says. For me, the closest brush came when I was walking through a forest with my company back in my Marine Reserve days. Three Brama bulls came charging at me out of the growth about 50 feet to my right. With nowhere to easily get to for shelter before they reached me, I figured I was dead. With that in mind, I decided I wasn't going to die running away, so I charged into them. At the point when I would have been stomped or gored to death they split apart just enough to where I could get between them without being gutted by their horns.
I kept running through them until I went down over a point where I couldn't see them and they couldn't see me. After enough time passed where I figured they were gone, I went back up the hill in time to hear my platoon sergent calling for the Corpsman. It turned out they were calling a Corpsman for me since they saw me dive into the Bulls and disappear and figured I'd been carried off by the critters.

It further turned out that it was not just three that I ran through, but six. Surprisngly, I wasn't in any shaky condition but just shrugged and continued on, although it did give me a good story to tell.

I seriously have to ask if you were armed at the time, because I would have blasted those suckers to kingdom come if they were running at me from 50 feet. Good to hear you weren't hurt though.

My close call... wait, one and only? Geez, that is a pretty big commitment.

The most prominent in my mind is (do not do this kids) when I used to ride a BMX bike, and I had just gotten a new brake after riding brakeless for quite a while. I was riding down a massive hill in the rain and I saw a red light in front of me so I tried to brake. After realizing my brake was not working because of the rain (thank god for that eh???) my foot had already jammed itself brakeless style in between the tire and the frame. I quite literally ended up hydroplaning on the groundwater (it was pouring BTW... man I am smart) and stopping in the middle of the crosswalk as a big truck goes flying past me. I can honestly say that being prepared for having no brakes saved a minimum of a broken arm, mainly because I am no fool and I will sure as hell jump of a bike if I need to.

Second worst was almost getting caught in between two buses riding through down-town San fransisco, but the impact would have been placed very firmly on my bike first, so no huge loss there either. Not smart per say, but the bike was at a much larger risk than I was. I like tanks and BMX are the closest thing to it on two wheels, barring ridiculously expensive motorcycles and your just lucky to survive an accident on one of those.

Third worse was falling 20 feet off a ski lift and thinking I had broken my spine (WHEEEE... I mean gak...)

Fourth worst was nearly being reincarnated as GWjr. but we won't go into that one.

When I was seven, my dad was driving us home up a winding road, and he was a bit drunk at the time, even though I didn't know it. He started doing stupid tricks and the car slid off the side of the road and smashed sideways into a tree. The trunk almost completely smashed through the engine, and it had only been a foot away from pulverising my legs.

Other than that, I was nearly hit by a truck when I was crossing the road in the dark. It clipped my side and sent me flying off the road, but it wasn't going particularly fast, so the actual impact with the ground hurt more than the truck itself.

When I was in college I was trying to light a fire with gasoline, but the whole gas can ended up exploding in my hands. I ended up getting drenched in gasoline but had no burns or anything, it was truly a miracle that I came out of that with nothing more than the shakes.

I doubt anyone will believe this, but....

When I was in school (so 2 years ago) my friends and I stole a street sweeper that was parked on campus. The keys were in it, and the door was unlocked, so it wasn't some crime of the century deal. Anyway, we drove it around for a while (none of us should have been driving, but street sweepers are slow) and eventually decided to head towards the river (Mississippi River).

Long story short; my Afgahni buddy got it in his head that he wanted to reenact a scene from this action movie we had seen the day before (Fire Down Below). In order to do this he drove the street sweeper over one of the cliffs flanking the river; jumping out roughly 20 feet before the edge. I had gotten out about 50 feet before that.

I was stabbed in the shoulder by a psycho girlfriend once. A couple of inches lower and it would have gone through my heart.It took a few hours for that realization to hit me, and I ended up being more freaked out then when it actually happened. She's still out there as far as I know. I wish I had a picture of her so I could post it, as a warning. She's fething crazy!!!

Almost being hit by an ambulance going 75 on a street.

Wrexasaur wrote:
I seriously have to ask if you were armed at the time, because I would have blasted those suckers to kingdom come if they were running at me from 50 feet. Good to hear you weren't hurt though.

I was packing about 60 pounds of green crap with pack and all, but I was only armed with blanks for my rifle. Even if I had live rounds, a .223 isn't going to do much to a group of 1200+ pound bulls running straight at you unless you get incredibly lucky and hit them all in the eye. The guys that saw me plunge into the critters said they'd never seen anyone move as fast as when I made that charge, and it must have spooked the bulls enough to make them part just enough for me to get through them.
An interesting side notes to the trip was the C-130 we were flying down to Puerto Rico in started developing hydrolic problems over the ocean and we had to turn back to make an emegency landing in Georgia. No one on the plane was panicing though, and were just carrying on business as usual. The thought was if we were going to die, at least it would be a wild last ride. I was playing a game of chess at the time, and I could probably tell you most of the moves from that game.

garret wrote:Almost being hit by an ambulance going 75 on a street.

How did you miss that one? Are you deaf Garret?

Maybe or just they forgot to turn ther lights and siren on.

I was medically dead after drowning in a swimming pool. For something like 5 minutes, then I was revived. No NDE's or anything, sadly.

sA

The other day a friend of mine took eight 4+ saves on his Imperial Guardsmen and passed every one of them. Last time he every uses my dice.

As for real life, i've never really come that close to death. I accidently stuck a tape measure between the plug of a cassette/record player and the power point once as a child. It made for a very impressive display of sparks, but i wasn't electrocuted or even burned.

I live a life on the edge it seems...

Bitten by 2 snakes.
Fell out of a car going around a roundabout.
Run over by a car
Electrocuted 3 times
Pleural effusion caused my entire right pleural space to be full of fluid.
Had a 40kg hay bale fall off the top of a hay stack (lets say 5m) onto my head whilst I was sitting.
Hit a kangaroo whist driving at 140km/hr, writing off my car.

I had strepthroat (or some sort of bad bacterial infection in my throat) really bad one time. I mean it was hard to breathe 23.90 hours a day and this had been going on for a week. I was in pretty rough shape (and didn't have insurance). My mother-in-law is a nurse (so she's trustworthy right, right? She suggests that I take an exsasperent (or something like that) to get the mucus out. I didn't follow her advice, but I went to the doctor instead.

Long story short, if I would have followed my mother-in-laws advice my throat would have swollen shut and I would have choked to death if I wasn't at a hospital.

back in '07 I had the luck of being one of 2 people stood on the bus because of a lack of seats (the other being my missus).

Some berk decided to pull out of a crossroads without looking, causing the bus to swerve nad I shot down the aisle of the bus ending up about 2" from faceplanting the windscreen of the bus. Luckily enough I managed to grab a handrail, screwed my shoulder and back up in the process, but at least I didn't go splat.

Almost impaled by a long piece of metal from a mailbox that my colleague was trying to tear from the pavement with a crane. The support legs buckled under the force of the crane and the small bar in between the two support legs sprang loose, missing me by centimetres and embedding itself into the asphalt of the cycling path with a thunk. Oddly enough I didn't gak myself in fear until several months later.

I got hit by a speeding car while playing street hockey when i was 7, standing back up and trying to run home with a shattered knee and a busted up head is a sure fire way to get a hilarious reaction btw

I had a similar pain when Tom Brady got injured 5 minutes into the first game last season, THE CHEIFS?! REALLY NOW?!

An incident with a rope swing and a rope burn (neck/throat) when I was 7 or so.

We had a tyre swing in the yard that the tyre had come off. I was climbing the rope to get into the tree (I suppose - I have no actual memory of the event) but slipped and ended up with the rope wrapped around my neck, choking me.

I once told She Who Must Be Obeyed to shut up. I was technically killed and in a very messy way I might add, but I've been sent back until my task is completed.

This morning, tomorrow morning I'll be another day closer.

Waaagh_Gonads wrote:
Electrocuted 3 times

Those death sentences are a real pain aren;t they waughy...


Automatically Appended Next Post:

barlio wrote:

Long story short, if I would have followed my mother-in-laws advice my throat would have swollen shut and I would have choked to death if I wasn't at a hospital.

Here, I bolded the important part. Remember you're never quite good enough for her daughter...

Never really been close myself, though I have messed about with bits of dead bodies in my university's human anatomy and physiology department while I was having lessons in the dissection rooms.

The smell is one that stays with you...

I have to share this story because it is one of the craziest close calls I have EVER heard.

I used to hang out with a guy who's Father did a lot of construction, and was working on a pre-fab house at one point. So, this guy and a friend of his were up at the place with the Father framing out some rebar for a bit of concrete work on a garage they added.

The Father was walking around on the rebar (which isn't usually the best idea) and taking measurements I think. He tripped and fell into the rebar mesh getting a random bit of rebar THROUGH HIS NECK... think about that one for a minute. From what I heard it sounded like they were not using rebar caps, so this guy could very well been up for a Darwins award recommendation at the very least.

The Father ended up being okay somehow, I think that the rebar might have just been loose, but I am not sure. Miraculous really though, that is some pretty heavy stuff.

SilverMK2 wrote:Never really been close myself, though I have messed about with bits of dead bodies in my university's human anatomy and physiology department while I was having lessons in the dissection rooms.

The smell is one that stays with you...

Try amniotic fluid during a caesarian... it goes everywhere and is so sickly sweet it makes you sick.

The anatomy department at my university did have a special smell to it, I wouldn't say bad... just chemical/preserved.

Waaagh_Gonads wrote:Try amniotic fluid during a caesarian... it goes everywhere and is so sickly sweet it makes you sick.

The anatomy department at my university did have a special smell to it, I wouldn't say bad... just chemical/preserved.

I will have to take your word on the amniotic fluid.

Though I agree on the smell not being terrible... just something that you probably will not smell outside of somewhere that preserves bits of bodies. Very distictive and chemically.

I got shot with in arrow in the jaw. The doctor said I was lucky because if it had hit me an inch lower it would have gone right through my neck.

Take your pick, with approximate ages!

First up, I was an induced Birth as Mumsie Grotsnik was horrifically ill, and there was every chance we both would have popped our clogs. Both of us made it through that one.

Then, 2 weeks later, it turned out the Buildy Grots in Mumsie Grotsniks tummy tum had eaten part of the plans for my majestic body and failed to notice that my tummy tum really did need that hole in the bottom so I could process food. This was in 1980. The procedure used involved Keyhold surgery, very much a pioneering method at the time. Had I been born a year or so earlier, chances are that would have knobbled me as well.

Thankfully, the next few years passed without really threatening my life, though various Elder Brother related injuries were sustained (split lip, Playmobil spear stabbed into my ear. That sort of thing).

Then when I was 14, my most serious Elder Brother injury was inflicted, when the daft bugger lobbed me through a window, severely lacerating my left arm. Artery was missed literally by a milimetre. Even after 15 years, my hand is still a bit spazzy. Not good when it's your dominant hand (yes the other one does wear a Gimp Suit).

The following years saw nothing especially serious, barring a fork in the head which made a highly amusing 'pop' sound when I pulled it out my skull. Once again, courtest of Elder Brother Injury Services (Hurt in an 'accident'? Would you like to be? Then simply call your Elder Brother).

Until my GCSE. Specifically, the first of two papers for my History GCSE, when my appendix decided what would really help was to rupture, meaning I got that peritonitis thingy, which also should really have killed me. Thankfully being a Mad Doc I come with 'Feel No Pain' and instead of being worm food gained a matching scar for the one from when I was a sprog (which has grown with me!)

And now the past 15 years have been pretty much injury free!

I'm invincible me!

Moral of the story: MDG's brothers attempted but failed miserably at killing him for 15 years...

29 years actually. I just got 'ard enough to fight back after a while.