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Ok guys i'm seeking advice. My clan is haveing drama issues, and i have never really botherd with drama, as far as i see it, it's pointless and boring. So if people pull me into it i dont pull punches. there is one clan member who seems to LIVE for the daram shes 17 and convinced shes the only girl gamer ever, which amuses me but thats about all the interaction i bother with. She has a few "followers" middle age men who like to flirt with her. now she kicked off because the admin in one of our games changed everyones names to silly things and she didnt like it, so shes kicked up a fuss and demanded the admin be kicked. well clan leader man quite rightly said since she was the only person bother by it then the admin would stay put. So now her and a couple of her middle age followers have decided there leaving the clan *i think it's a win but thats just me*. She put up an epic post about being singled out as a girl ( she forgets about me and the other girls in the clan).

In your oppinion would you even bother trying to sort this out with them or would you *and this is my prefrance* just call it a WIN! no more drama no more pervy old dudes...WIN WIN WIN! fair enough we are 3 members down but we have 15 people trying to get intot he clan so where is the trouble?
They have asked me to do something about this and i'm not sure what that something is. Any advice please!

Roze
XhugglesX

Hmmm...

Confucius say, let creepy, dopey, and flirty go... they serve no purpose but to annoy.

Post a very cool, no-reactive response to her post, stating that there is not victimisation within the Clan (dunno what that is, like a Guild?) or sexism and reaffirm your loyalty to the Clan leadership and state why you believe in it.

As a woman in the Clan, contradicting her will greatly diminish her 'angle', doing it in a polite manner will further strengthen your cause and make her sound stupid.

Take the moral highground, don't get drawn into a slanging match, state calmly why you do not agree. We had a little drama queen try to tip the boat and stage a full takeover in our guild on eq2, it was a very mixed gender guild and in the end she left with the one guy that followed his other brain no matter what. It was, as you have said, a win and she basically played into the Guild Officer's hands by screaming and stamping her feet whilst they remained calm and polite. Potential 5th columnist removed.

Purge the drama makers.

Win.

Or just say goodbye and have a nice day.

No need to respond at all, and talking to them is only bound to enrage their delusional perspectives.

Trust me, it is simply not worth it to invest any more effort into.

MeanGreenStompa wrote:Take the moral highground, don't get drawn into a slanging match, state calmly why you do not agree.

It is a gaming club man, no moral high ground there, just fun and games... and occasionally TFG's that just need to be escorted out.

Let Gwar! talk to her.

Better yet, let Gwar! eat her .

BTW WHERE IS GWAR!? I miss him.

He got banned for, amongst other things, calling Jesus a Cosmic Zombie Jew and flaming people, IIRC.

He is banned?

I don't remember that one happening, although it seems extremely likely given his demeanor.

Find little things that drive her CRAZY without openly insulting or antagonizing her. She will have a meltdown and the attention will be on her, not you. That's being a dick. It takes practice and ruthlessness, but it's totally worth it to restore the peace.

I tried to get William Murderface being a dick Pt 1, but youtube didn't have it.

I knew he hadn't been around in awhile, but I didn't know he got banned.

Sad days.....

thanks! she already hates me so annoying her should be really easy...my presance annoys her

I'm actually considering telling the admins and mods to handle it themselves........after all i'm neither, why do they expect me to deal with it? Every time i tell he what i think they spend days shouting at me for "Upsetting her".
i'm very confused by all this.

Female gamers that think they are the only gamers are not really gamers but attention seekers. I know quite a few female gamers. While not as common as male gamers, they are not really that rare. Especially in MMO's.

I have one of these in the group I mess around with. I go out of my way to annoy her or make whatever she is currently going through worse. Its something new every day and I am always told "You don't want to deal with me right now".

But I am usually skating on thin ice as she is an Officer and her boy toys are also. But then again, the other Officers are my friends.

Anyways, what I am saying is. Give her hell, you will get a lot of satisfaction from it.

Roze wrote:Ok guys i'm seeking advice. My clan is haveing drama issues, and i have never really botherd with drama, as far as i see it, it's pointless and boring. So if people pull me into it i dont pull punches. there is one clan member who seems to LIVE for the daram shes 17 and convinced shes the only girl gamer ever, which amuses me but thats about all the interaction i bother with. She has a few "followers" middle age men who like to flirt with her. now she kicked off because the admin in one of our games changed everyones names to silly things and she didnt like it, so shes kicked up a fuss and demanded the admin be kicked. well clan leader man quite rightly said since she was the only person bother by it then the admin would stay put. So now her and a couple of her middle age followers have decided there leaving the clan *i think it's a win but thats just me*. She put up an epic post about being singled out as a girl ( she forgets about me and the other girls in the clan).

In your oppinion would you even bother trying to sort this out with them or would you *and this is my prefrance* just call it a WIN! no more drama no more pervy old dudes...WIN WIN WIN! fair enough we are 3 members down but we have 15 people trying to get intot he clan so where is the trouble?
They have asked me to do something about this and i'm not sure what that something is. Any advice please!

Roze
XhugglesX

Consider it a win. Sounds like they all have issues.

Tell them, sorry, I feel for you but I'm just locked in here (as you're shutting the literal or proverbial door).


Automatically Appended Next Post:

Cheese Elemental wrote:He got banned for, amongst other things, calling Jesus a Cosmic Zombie Jew and flaming people, IIRC.

Assumptions of permanent vacations are just that, assumptions.

But yes, let Gwar eat them. High protein, good calcium, low carb meal. He'll love it. NOM NOM NOM

LOL i wish he would eat them there making my lovely game community so miserable! Ou clan leader is to bloody nice, he's trying to make everyone happy and it's full of fail. They have made me and Admin for the servers and Mod on the site.......SO, they have said (as a comunity) what ever i decide to do they will stick by it so this is what i have done..........Please tell me if you think it's to harsh.

*flirty girl*= You have turned out to be nothing but clan headach, not to mention your accuracy sucks and your timeing is terrible, so i'm letting you know now you will not be re-considerd after your departure. Have fun.

(she has been removed from all forum activity and clan groups)

*creepy and creepier*= Your willingness to drop the clan for a peice of *bottom* makes me glad your crusty *bottoms* are no longer part of our community. Were calling this a WIN. We win because it only cost us 3 members to be rid of all the drama you freaks brought along.
Good day

Harsh? fair?
what ever it's the truth and even though the other mods are to nice i'm not I have left them on my friends list so if they want to have a go at me personally there more than welcome

You can say that here. There I'd just poffer what has been said earlier. "We're sorry to see you go, byby! Next..." No need to be impolite.

I wonder sometimes how many Mods have been bouncers, there are quite a few similarities. There is no need to be aggressive just tell them to have a nice day, most of the time trouble-makers just want attention anyway. Matter of fact I had to escort an old friend out that drank too much at my place the other night .

I had a friend throw up in my car once. Frazzled was not a happy camper!!! Not related at all, but your escorting your friend out triggered that.

So if i just stick with...nice knowing you bye now.............that would be more impactual?

If your point is to just end the conflict, most definitely. If your club is small, there need be no reason besides majority vote quite frankly. If you try and debate your decision with these trouble-makers... they will just make more trouble; imagine that .

Roze wrote:So if i just stick with...nice knowing you bye now.............that would be more impactual?

That should do just fine. If you want more of a formal message we can converse PMwise.
No need to be impactual. You just want them gone with a minimum of further drama.
Think like a parent. You don't want justice. You just want quiet.


Automatically Appended Next Post:

Wrexasaur wrote:If your point is to just end the conflict, most definitely. If your club is small, there need be no reason besides majority vote quite frankly. If you try and debate your decision with these trouble-makers... they will just make more trouble; imagine that .

Wrexy is 100% on point.

Can someone tell me WTF is a CLan? I'm, getting images of small groups of cave men, or ironically were creatures from a really bad series of books. I guess the only thing appropriate to say here is:

"What if you break the law?"
"He who breaks the law, must go to the house of pain!"

If a clan member from a few clans I've been in/admined/officer'd had tried to pull drama, they had to STFU and GTFO.

Normally it would be just a huge ostracisation.

sA

@Frazzled: A Clan is a collective of gamers under an in-game banner (aka formal Cliques). Think of them like GW gaming clubs (Wrecking Crew, SAWS, etc...), but on the intraweb. They generally have planned gaming times and a hierarchy (sp) of sorts.

Interesting.

well i did as your guys suggested, i left it at See ya *wave * and it went...well..the other way really. 2 of the 3 contacted the clan leader or rather Miss Flirty contacted the clan leader and when i woke this morning i had an e-mail about how she's back in the clan, how she was "having a rough time of it" << ERM and??>> and that i should "pretend it never happend". Lord only knows which big guns she used for that...i'm guessing tears.

If the drama is that bad, I'd suggest leaving the clan yourself. If that's not an option for you then it's probably not that big a deal, although annoying. You won't get the drama if you don't associate with the drama queens.

I’ve joined some 40K and roleplay groups over the years, and learned the hard way that gaming groups can be downright odd at times. This is especially the case with ideas about gender, while most gamers are pretty normal there is an unusually high portion of male gamers with some very odd ideas about women and even stranger behaviour. It’s been a more recent discovery of mine that the portion of female gamers with very odd ideas and behaviour may be even higher.

The big lesson is that there’s no point gaming in an environment full of drama and pettiness. If it gets to a point where you expect drama on a regular basis you just move on, and find another group. No gaming is better than bad gaming, and if it’s an on-line game it should be no problem to find a replacement group.

It’s real hard to deal with drama when it’s in your family, with your SO or with life-long mates, because you need to stick by those people. But if it’s just people you game with on-line? Move on.

Yep, sounds like you should leave the group.

They dropped responsibility on you and promised to stand by your decision, yet refused to back you up when it came down to it. Cowardly to put it lightly.

There is this fantastic new technology in e-mails, where you can block them from entering your box... it is called ignore or spam, press it already.

These are the kind of people that you are going to hope to god you don't have to work with in the future. If you end up in a work situation with cats like this, just remember to take a few deep breaths and simply be busy any time they come near you. Requests from them will lead you into numerous situations of this very nature.

The final point to this whole technique is finding out if you have a truly bonkaroo-nutso on your hands, because you will run into them from time to time, especially when it is a hot day (this is actually true BTW). When you find out someone is crazy as hell, you can take your issue to the police, mainly due to the fact that there is no practical way of dealing with it yourself. On top of this there are amazing things called restraining orders, that seem to work quite well for most situations.

If you cannot draw the line because you are afraid or simply without other options, you are going to be pushed around a lot in the future. If you have to worry about the crazies that happen to be messing with you at a given time, you don't even want to know how many there are on this planet.

the clan leader is my Best mate IRL, and 70% of the clan are people i am close friends with and have been for years...funny thing is the drama is from people who are not part of our social group anyway. Either way i think i've made my point about not being involved with them anymore. we'll see how it pans out i guess. thanks for the advice guys.